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whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst · 3 years

Text

Texts from the Lost Tomb part 6.1

🎶 Back on the bullshit I never got off🎶

Is this another unnecessary story arc?? With three sections??

Yes.

Wushanju Crew Chat

Wang Meng: You know, I’m someone who appreciates consistency in my day. My life is pleasant, very few issues indeed if you ignore the big ones. And yet. Yet here we are. With unresolved messes at the end of a day.

Wang Pangzi: SOMETHIN YOU NEED TO SAY MARY POPPINS

Wang Meng: We need to talk about Huo Daofu and the glittery bead curtain.

Wang Pangzi: MY FAVE TEEN WIZARD SERIES

Wu Xie: did you turn on that suggested word thingy lol

What glittery bead curtain

Wang Meng: I closed the shop at 6:00pm this evening on the dot. I locked all of the doors in and out of the shop very carefully, especially in light of recent events. The hall leading to the back office was empty. I filed the day’s paperwork, updated and sent emails, and then spent an extra hour organizing receipts and dusting. When I came back out, there were glittery iridescent bead curtains over the front entrance to the shop.

What could this mean?

Wu Xie: uh that you need to spend less time at work?

Wang Pangzi: LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ONE FOR THE DETECTIVES. THE MYSTERY OF THE BEDAZZLED THRESHOLD COMMENCES

Wu Xie: I think we can be relatively secure in thinking a glittery bead curtain isn’t a hostile threat

Wang Pangzi: SAYS YOU

I REMEMBER YE OLDE EXPLORATION TIMES HOW FAST THINGS GOT FURIOUS

BEANBAG CHAIRS SET AFLAME AND LEFT ON DOORSTEPS AS A WARNING

GLITTERBOMBS FOR DAYS

PANIC AT THE DISCO

Wang Meng: Ugh, forget it. I should have just taken them down, regardless of who they belong to.

Zhang Qiling: They are not mine.

Wang Pangzi: A BOLD STATEMENT COMING FROM OUR PRIME SUSPECT

SOMEONE QUICK GO DRAW CHALK AROUND THE DOORWAY TO MARK THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

Wang Meng: Do we know anyone who *would* sneak in and put those up? For whatever reason, legal or not? Even as a joke?

Wang Pangzi: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING WHETHER WE KNOW ANYONE WHO IS CHAOTIC, AN OUTLAW, A PRANKSTER AND/OR SNEAKS INTO PLACES

BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN OUR SUSPECT LIST IS LITERALLY EVERYONE WE KNOW EXCEPT FOR YOU.

Wu Xie: okay let’s think about this; for starters, I didn’t break into my own shop

Wang Meng: You would be in danger of doing some work in the process, that’s true.

Wang Pangzi: LOL

Wu Xie: ANYWAY let’s keep going. For example, Xiao Ge would only break in somewhere for a good reason. Xiao Ge, did you do this?

Zhang Qiling: No.

Wu Xie: okay who’s next

Wang Pangzi: YOU REALLY MISSED YOUR CALLING IN INTERROGATION TIANZHEN

REALLY PUT THE SCREWS TO HIM

IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE;)

Zhang Qiling: How can we be certain *you* didn’t do it?

Wang Meng: Admittedly that was my guess, too.

Wang Pangzi: WOW I SEE HOW IT IS

BLAME PANGZI AS USUAL

ANYWAY HOW DOES HUO DAOFU FIT INTO THIS

Wu Xie: Oh yeah him! Oops I got distracted

Wang Pangzi: UR ENTIRE HISTORY IN A NUTSHELL

Wu Xie: Ugh fuck off

Wang Meng what abt Huo Daofu??

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wu Xie: oh sorry xiaoge I didn’t realize you wouldn’t have spent much time around him last year

He and I go way back

Zhang Qiling: Way back where?

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: I CANNOT BELIEVE HE IS BUYING YOUR INNOCENT ACT

IF YOU EVER TURN TO EVIL WE ARE FUCKED

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO HUO DAOFU IS

YOU WERE EXTREMELY POLITE AND BORDERLINE FRIENDLY TOWARDS HIM

Zhang Qiling: I wanted him to feel welcome. I wanted to be sure he understands he has a place here. A specific place.

Wang Pangzi: FOR A SILENT GUY YOU ARE A MASTER AT SUBTLE POWER PLAYS IM ALL TINGLY

LMAO THE IDEA OF WU XIE LEAVING YOU FOR HUO DAOFU IS HILARIOUS AND ALSO NOPE

Zhang Qiling: Rationally, I understand that.

Main Chat

Wang Meng: Huo Daofu is coming for the weekend—didn’t Wu Xie tell you? Wu Xie asked me to check in a week ahead so we could start getting ready for his arrival

Wu Xie: oh yeah I did do that

Wang Meng: Fortunately I know you and so I already went ahead and took care of everything.

Re: the trip

He made a deal with Wu Xie’s doctor that he would do periodic checkups on him here at Wushanju

Bc Wu Xie hates being in the hospital

And frankly the hospital hates him too

Wang Pangzi: FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT LOL

I FORGOT HUO DAOFU WAS DOING THAT

A VERY CHIVALROUS GESTURE

WOULDNT YOU SAY

XIOAGE

Zhang Qiling: Is it safe for him to be here with a criminal loose on the premises?

Wu Xie: Right, back to the curtain! Let’s focus on the curtain, hmm?

Wang Pangzi: I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS WEEKEND.

ALSO WE CAN RULE OUT XIAO BAI FOR THE CURTAIN SHE JUST SENT A SELFIE FROM NORWAY COVERED IN GREEN SLIME WITH ZERO CONTEXT, UR PROTEGE INDEED

Wu Xie: okay but who else would do something so oddly charming yet illegal and—wait.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: hey, Glasses hasn’t been in touch lately right?

Li Cu: uh nope

Unless u count the outdated memes

Why, is money or Xie Yuchen missing

Or is this curtain related, I saw Wang Meng’s tweet

Wu Xie: haha no nothing to worry about really

(I mean maybe? but who knows)

Wang Meng is probably just getting a little paranoid in his old age

Li Cu: better than getting reckless and stupid as hell in ur old age

Wu Xie: …hey:(

Unknown Number: Li Cu, we discussed this.

Wu Xie: ????????

Li Cu: *sigh* fine, reckless and stupid as heck

Unknown Number: …close enough.

Wu Xie: EXCUSE who is that

Madame, Sir, Non-Binary Tree Spirit, etc—whomst the fuck

Are you

Li Cu is underage FYI

So Im staying on this chat

Li Cu: okay first of all, it’s not like that

Second of all I’m literally not underage I s2g

u threw the embarrassing surprise bday party, okay so u should remember

And C, that’s my counselor and I invited her. She wanted to meet u and I knew u wouldn’t agree to a visit so I added her to our chat

we have been discussing u

Wu Xie: Oh wow!!!!!!!

What a surprise:)

hi so nice to meet you:)

Main Chat:

Wu Xie: RED FUCKING ALERT

FUCK THE CURTAIN FUCK THE VISIT

IVE BEEN TRICKED INTO FAMILY THERAPY BY A SMUG TEENAGER WHO TEXTS UNKNOWN NUMBERS

Wang Meng: I assume that means something to someone here?

Not my problem? Good.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHA GOD I LOVE LI CU

HES LIKE ADORABLE KARMA FOR ALL THE SHIT YOUVE PUT ME THROUGH

IM RAISING HIS ALLOWANCE

Wu Xie: wait i give him an allowance

has he been collecting on two allowances??

Zhang Qiling: Three. I knew about both of yours.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: so uh may I ask your name?

Unknown Number: you can call me Ms. Lee.

Now, if you’re comfortable talking in this format, why don’t you tell me how things have been going?

Wu Xie: oh everything is normal and fine and safe as usual, why do you ask:)

Li Cu: I heard about ur necklace thing. nice of you to NOT mention it.

another dangerous adventure. again. prick.

Ur lucky your cool boyfriend cares about you so much or you’d have already died like ten years ago

Wu Xie: lol try twenty years ago

Li Cu: That isn’t funny.

Unknown Number: …What?

Wu Xie: shit ur right, okay that was a bit glib, my apologies.

…I use humor as a coping mechanism?

Unknown Number: and Li Cu, how do you feel about that?

Li Cu: he doesn’t even know what that phrase means

He doesn’t cope, like ever

In fact

It’s kind of why we met

Which is a funny story in retrospect tbh

Wu Xie: haha what are you talking about sweetie hahaha need I remind you of certain anecdotes that could idk send me to jail maybe lmao

Unknown Number: …You know, perhaps an in-person meeting might be more effective?

Wu Xie: haha such a nice idea but why

Main Chat

Wu Xie: If I go to jail, I’ll have to create alliances for protection, right, that’s how it works on tv

Who do we know who spends time in jail

Other than Hei Yangjing, he’s only ever there for like 12 hours and i suspect he just gets himself arrested bc he enjoys the breaking out process

Also how’s the curtain case coming along

Zhang Qiling: Has someone threatened you?

Wu Xie: well not yet but soon I’m sure

Wang Pangzi: WHERE WAS THIS PARANOIA WHEN WE GOT TAKEN TO THE TEA HOUSE HUH

Snake Eyes Minus Your Fucking Therapist Chat

Li Cu: okay how tf did u pull off spy and undercover shit

u are sus as hell

Wu Xie: damn son is it pick on Wu Xie night

I missed the flyers or I would’ve invited my uncles

Also re: the curtain it’s been mostly solved

Li Cu: I’m not your son, idiot.

Wu Xie: …oh. Sorry, sorry, you’re right, bad choice of words, haha

Forget i said anything

Delete this chat even

Li Cu: shit I meant

Legally, biologically, I meant—

shit

…I turn into an asshole as a coping mechanism?

Wu Xie: oh that’s all okay! I have to go do something else now let me know if you need anything okay kid thanks!

Li Cu: goddamn it calm down who’s the kid here

lemme organize my thoughts so I can articulate my emotions fuckin healthily or w/e

Ugh maybe for like one afternoon we could go to Ms. Lee together? She knows how to word stuff

Wu Xie: uh…okay.

Li Cu: Anyway you don’t need to worry abt jail

As if you would survive prison for one day you’d piss off half the place in like an hour or less

I gave Ms. Lee the heavily edited version of the desert highway to hell roadtrip and i discussed it more in terms of like “nightmarish but still wouldn’t take any of it back”

Well maybe the sand

that shit was everywhere

Wu Xie: oh kiddo. It’s fine, really…You don’t have to explain yourself to me.

Li Cu: no, no it’s just

I do technically have a dad

who is an asshole. Being a son doesn’t really mean shit to me bc it sucked.

So you need to stop backing down just cuz ur guilty abt stuff. I’m really really glad ur not my dad in a good way. Do u get what I mean there

Where’s the mafia widower I followed into hell, huh

Wu Xie: Ur a good kid, despite my influence. I’m really glad you have someone to talk to after everything I…after everything. Wow this talking through feelings thing is kind of weird but nice ur right

Jfc no wonder it took me and xiaoge so long to—you know what, we won’t get into that

Li Cu: ew tmi

Also re: this week’s recent necklace fuckery

I moved my stuff here, I live here now

So you can’t die anymore

Or else…Idk I don’t have a threat planned

anyways abt the curtain

Wu Xie: oh my god, kid…kid you have no idea

I am in tears.

Li Cu: see this is why I can’t be nice to you I can sense the hallmark channel from here

Ugh don’t be sad in ur room that’s dumb

Go hug Pangzi or something

Maybe delete this chat

Or the curtain thing

Focus on the curtain thing

Just stfu and go away

Wu Xie: <3 screenshotting this <3

Li Cu: I take back everything I said. This is why Xiao Ge sleeps on the roof. I hope the ghosts of the Wangs put up that curtain to strangle you somehow. Go die in a stupid way, it’ll suit you.

Wu Xie: lol don’t worry I’m not gonna embarrass you with it or anything

Main Chat

Wu Xie: omg guys look how cute my kid is *sending screenshot*

Wang Pangzi: I MEAN

HE IS WISHING YOU DEATH

BUT SURE

CUTE I GUESS

Wu Xie: no but read the whole thing:):):)

Zhang Qiling: It is indeed very hard to remain angry with you. And you are welcome to join me on the roof.

Wang Pangzi: UH NOPE

NOT WHENI HAD TO BLEACH THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN

DONT TRAUMATIZE THE EARLY BIRDS THEYRE ALREADY FREAKED OUT BY U YA HOODIE CRYPTID

Wu Xie: ok true but babe ur like a sexy cryptid

Wang Meng: so, are we just accepting that there is a glittery curtain of unknown origin, and Huo Daofu is going to have to see it while he’s waiting for you at Wushanju bc you’re going to family therapy?

Wu Xie: right

Wang Pangzi: SHOULDA TAKEN EARLY RETIREMENT HUH

Wang Meng: I’m going to go dust something.

Unnamed Chat:

Unknown number: so the curtain…

Unknown number 2: yep, not my best work but I kinda panicked last minute u know

Unknown number: what is in the water at Wushanju that makes everyone dumb and attractive

Unknown number 2: relax they’ll figure it out

#ultimate note #whomst #wu xie #dmbj #the lost tomb #pingxie #iron triangle

36 notes · View notes

jbuffyangel · 5 years

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Legacy: Arrow 7x12 Review (Emerald Archer)

Spoiler alert: I loved the 100th episode. I know this is a controversial opinion because it is universally hated in the fandom (I think), but I truly loved the episode for where Oliver was at in his story. So, I didn’t go into the 150th with a lot of expectations. The 150th didn’t need to fix anything for me. Were there some misfires? Yeah and we’ll get into those, but overall I enjoyed this episode.

Let’s dig in…

Queen Family

William is home and our Queen family is reunited. FINALLY.

Yes, I know it’s technically the Queen-Smoak-Clayton family, but nobody is really expecting me to hyphenate three names over a dozen times? If you are then that’s crazy. I won’t do it.

Oliver and Felicity are overjoyed to see William,

but unfortunately the sentiment is not returned.

Source: olicitygifs

“Emerald Archer” introduces us to William’s alter ego: THE MOODY TEENAGER.

This may be the toughest foe Oliver and Felicity have ever faced.

Kidding. Not really. I’m knee deep in preteen years and the teenage ones are barreling at me with lightning speed, so I identity with this storyline A LOT.

Felicity deftly navigates the creature otherwise known as MOODY TEEN by complimenting his ability to find her virus (our budding computer genius. I am so proud.)

and then lovingly prodding William into discussing whatever is bothering him

by threatening grounding (for a rude & sassy attitude).

Source: felicitysmoakgifs

Y’all I am taking notes. MOM ICON AT WORK.

William is ticked because his parents didn’t bring him home for Christmas. Is that what happened?

It’s so hard to figure out what holidays Arrow is acknowledging. Oliver said in 7x08, “Christmas vacation seems like 20 years from now,” so I assumed William came home sometime after 7x09, but I guess not.

Yeah, I get it kid. That sucks. #TeamWilliam.

In your parents’ defense they were hashing out the emotional evolution of their marriage while Oliver was body swapping with Bart. But that’s just a regular Monday for Arrow, so I understand the kid’s beef.

Source: ebett

Oliver playing television star (hehehe SO META) via this documentary doesn’t exactly scream crisis to William either. But-but-but all the shaky camera shots for gritty realism are cool though right honey? Yeah, William doesn’t care.

HOWEVER, if I spoke to my mother the way William spoke to Felicity and violently shoved an electronic device she paid for in her face while making demands regarding the wifi security (which she also pays for), I would be taking my life into my hands. My mother would have removed me from this earth, which is her right.

Same goes for my kid. I once asked my child during a temper tantrum if she wanted to do this the nice way or the nasty way. She put her little hands on her hips, all of age 3, and said with absolute conviction while glaring at me, “NASTY.” She is now 11, going on 12, and I assure you she has never made that mistake again. So, I commend Felicity’s reserve. I’m afraid I do not share that level of parenting patience.

Why is Felicity taking all the heat when it was Oliver who screwed the pooch by going to prison in the first place? Well, yes one can always trace the source of the problem back to the biggest pine tree to ever live,

but in this particular circumstance I agree with William. It was Felicity’s decision to send him away to boarding school. I’m not saying she shouldn’t have done it. Felicity had extremely good reasons to send William away.

Source: ebett

However, a large part of Felicity’s beef with Oliver after his release from prison was his constant Monday morning quarterbacking of her decisions. Oliver can hero however he wants, but he doesn’t get to question how Felicity deals with the consequences of his heroism. That was the agreement right? RIGHT. Felicity said the buck stops with her. So, the buck stops with her. Sending William away was her call, so now she’s dealing with some fallout.

Source: felicitysmoakgifs

Don’t worry, I fully expect Daddy to get looped in, but I like how they are focusing on William and Felicity first. It’s rare to run into problems with your child when both parents are in the room. One or the other fields the play first and then you loop your partner in. At least, that’s how it works in my house. (Seriously, I don’t know how single parents do it. Y’all are kings and queens among peasants.)

Side note: you never ever contradict your partner’s parenting decisions in front of the little human. It shows weakness. The wee nugget can smell it like fear and it gives them a tactical advantage. These are tools of the trade. Get a pen. Write it down.

It was just William and Felicity for six months. They built their own family without Oliver together. Of course, Oliver was still a part of the family and they missed him like crazy, but the day to day was just the two of them. Some of those decisions are coming home to roost, so it makes sense to me Felicity is taking the parenting lead. She was William’s only parent for quite some time.

Felicity, being the super hacker mom that she is, figures out what is really going on – William is lying to her. It seems he has been expelled from school. Oops.

The reason for his expulsion will be revealed to us next week I am sure, but I would say now is the time to loop Dad in.

Source: felicitysmoakgifs

These scenes between William and Felicity were the best in the episode and it never ceases to amaze me how far their relationship has progressed in such a short amount of time. There is nothing Felicity can’t do and no man she cannot smoak. Life with a teenage William is going to become more complicated and the parenting more challenging. But William will be a better person for having Felicity in his life. No matter where this story goes that’s a solid fact.

Olicity

It’s been 150 episodes and we’ve come a looooong way with Oliver Queen.

He’s so at peace with himself in these interviews.

Oliver has merged both personas, the hood is down, mask is off, he's married to the love of his life, his boy is home, and his life is filled with purpose.

Source: smoakmonster

This man was snapping necks in the pilot and now he’s the softest teddy bear to ever exist because his son is home from school. MY HEART IS FULL.

Source: olicitygifs

To begin where Oliver began, and to be where he is now, is nothing short of miraculous. He may not be a saint, as Curtis notes later, but that’s exactly where he is headed. That’s who fully realized superheroes are.

But we still have some road to travel. Oliver’s only real area of doubt is his leadership abilities. I still don’t understand what mistakes Oliver made with Team Arrow.

Source: smoakmonster

He’s constantly referencing these “mistakes” particularly in “Emerald Archer.” This is a failing of Season 6. I truly think the writers believe the NTA versus OTA storyline was evenly handled, but in reality Oliver was completely in the right and the Newbies were acting like spoiled toddlers.

Oliver went to jail in some part to atone for his sins, but I do not feel any of those sins happened in Season 6. I view Oliver’s stint at Slabside as atonement for killing.

We can debate the necessities of that atonement, but this season feels like an ultimate purging of Oliver’s sins – venial and/or mortal. Whatever debt Oliver owed society, he paid it and then some. This only makes his soul more pure. If you don’t believe Oliver deserved to go to prison at all then it just adds more fuel to the martyr fire - all good things in the evolution of a saint.

However, now Oliver is questioning his ability to lead because of these so called “mistakes.” Based on statements Oliver has made in previous episodes, those mistakes would be lack of trust and lying.

I’m with him on the lying. Time to nip that in the bud, but that doesn’t mean Oliver owes everyone the truth immediately. He’s perfectly within his rights to take some time, yes even a month, to process the introduction of a new sister in his life. The man still has a right to some privacy and space.

Oliver’s guilt over not trusting the Newbies is fairly ridiculous since they gave him very good reasons not to trust them.

In case Oliver has forgotten, Dinah had a secret criminal boyfriend and Rene sold him out to the Feds. These are untrustworthy actions and they have consequences. I can’t remember what Curtis did, if anything. His crime is unceasing uselessness, so Oliver can and should ignore the man.

Oliver is not sure he’s meant to lead, which of course means he is absolutely the right person for the job. Only true leaders question their worthiness.

Source: smoakmonster

He returns to the destroyed bunker with a renewed commitment to rebuild the bunker

(with handy dandy deputy badges for the team) and learn from his mistakes.

Source: smoakmonster

I imagine Oliver’s new leadership style will be more trusting and democratic, but inclusion only gets you so far. Team Arrow may be the kindling in the Star City fire, but the citizens need Oliver Queen to set it ablaze.

The Team Arrow table is round both in the destroyed present and flash forward bunkers. It gives it a very Knights of the Round Table feel. Everyone can have an opinion and equal say, but in the end it was King Arthur’s kingdom. He pulled the sword from the stone, built Camelot and paid the ultimate price for his dream.

Oliver is King Arthur and Star City is his Camelot – or what he dreams Star City may one day become. He may pay the ultimate price for that dream like Arthur, but ultimately the loss of the hero teaches us the dream isn’t possible without the hero. Oliver may need Team Arrow, but the team and the city will soon discover they need him even more.

Source: ebett

This is something Felicity Smoak has always understood. Her belief in Oliver Queen and crystal clear understanding of who he is has never wavered in seven years. Even when they were separated romantically, Felicity saw Oliver as the man who would save Star City.

This belief became a compass for Oliver- his North Star. Felicity became the voice in Oliver’s head guiding him on his hero’s journey.

Her belief made Oliver believe and thus became a self fulfilling prophecy.

Edward: So what happens after he climbs up and rescues her?

Vivian: She rescues him right back. (Pretty Woman)

There is no Green Arrow without Felicity Smoak and there is no Felicity Smoak without Green Arrow. Each is dependent on the other. Their love is amalgamation of give and take & push and pull. Oliver and Felicity never cease in their pursuit to become their best selves, yet remain a beautiful example of unconditional love, acceptance and forgiveness.

Love changes us and it cements who we are. It is a constant drive of two diametrically opposed forces working in perfect cohesion. We find clarity in the swirl of finding love, falling in love and then settling into love. Oliver and Felicity found themselves in each other. It’s how we all do, regardless of whom or what you love.

All it took was one sweet and simple smile for Felicity to know exactly who Oliver Queen is.

Yet, who is he is equally about who they became together. Felicity saw Oliver’s light because of how brightly hers shined. Their heroic evolution is perfectly entwined.

Source: @olicitygifs

So, there is no better person to speak on this topic. The word vigilante falls woefully short. It cannot encompass everything her husband is or what their love has built together. It barely hints at the goodness Felicity saw hiding behind a ridiculous lie and a bullet ridden computer.

Felicity’s interview doesn’t shine a big enough spot light on her own contributions, but I think that’s primarily because she hasn’t been outed as Overwatch to the city. However, she has always been the truthsayer of Arrow and that’s her role in the documentary as well.

Felicity understands who Oliver is because she is his equal in every way.

Recognition of his heroism is recognition of hers as well. And someday the world will see everything Felicity sees with unwavering

clarity.

Source: @olicitygifs

Should there have been more of Felicity and Olicity in "Emerald Archer”? Yes, absolutely.

My thirst will never be satiated, but I’ve long since acclimated myself to quality over quantity. This was Felicity as she’s always been. I love whenever this show showcases her ability to cut through the bullshit and shine a light on the truth. The scenes between her and William were the best in the episode too. That said, an Olicity kiss and/or joint interview wouldn’t have killed them.

Welcome Back Guest Stars!

A good returning guest star angle works for me 99.999% of the time on any television show. What can I say? I’m nostalgic. Let us wile away the dull hours and spin a tale or two about the days of old.

Nostalgia in these types of retrospective episodes can get a little tricky. You need a good reason to bring back five or six actors who’ve left the show and we’ve heard almost nothing from for a few years, particularly the dead characters. Arrow’s documentary film idea for the 150th episode really works for me. It gives a legitimate reason to bring all of these characters back, but not necessarily keep them around. It’s not aliens so right there we’re already light years ahead.

HA! Get it? Light years? Yeah, you might not be laughing now but you’ll realize how funny that is later on.

Source: fatedxdestiny

Arrow starts with Quentin and boy is that ever the right call. This documentary is very pro vigilante. It was put on the shelf because Star City became anti vigilante, so who better to advocate for the masked heroes than the man who ran the SCPD for the last twenty odd years?

Quentin was always the touchstone to the real world. He was the bridge between Oliver and the citizens of Star City. He was also someone Oliver wanted to earn the respect of and that’s what he’s trying to do now. He’s trying to earn Star City’s respect EVEN THOUGH THESE UNGRATEFUL TWATS SHOULD ALREADY RESPECT HIM. Even though I believe it was time to let Quentin Lance go, I still miss him and whenever Paul Blackthorne comes on my television screen I cry big baby dumbo tears.

Source: fatedxdestiny

Then we roll right into the reason Oliver began this mission in the first place: FAMILY. Family for Oliver is and will always be Thea Queen. I shrieked when I saw her. I officially take back my “We’ll never see Willa Holland again” prediction. I was happy to be wrong.

Thea being the representative for all her dead family members is the most Thea thing this show has ever done. Kid is a walking poster child for bereavement. I think it’s really important to remember Starling City was a hot mess before Oliver showed up. This city wasn’t hitting anyone’s nifty top fifty places to raise a family. There was a serious cost to all the violence and Thea’s interview is a powerful reminder.

Oliver is seldom given his due. The newbies, Star City, officials, villains, and other superheroes are always ragging on him. But when Thea found out Oliver was the Arrow she thanked him. She was one of the few people who understood right from the start the good Oliver was doing. (Felicity is the other few people).

Oliver started this fight for many reasons, but chief among them was his love for his family. Thea has always returned that love tenfold. She is ride or die for her big bro and even though we had AMAZING Queen sibling scenes in the 100th it’s nice to see them honor their relationship no matter how far away Thea is. They do lose points for zero Queen sibling interaction though.

Source: fatedxdestiny

Sara gives one hell of a speech doesn’t she? It’s in a similar vein as Thea’s – reminding Star City of the cost of unchecked crime. She acknowledges it doesn’t matter whether or not a person is wearing a mask. This is a classy way of calling out Star City’s double standard. Honestly, who cares if it’s a cop or a guy dressed in leather saving your ass? What matters is someone stepped up to save your life.

It’s also a nice subtle acknowledgement of Felicity’s contributions. Sara has worn a mask as the Canary and fought without one as White Canary. She knows what matters is a person’s heart and not what they wear. Sara has always understood the importance of the unmasked in this line of work.

This feels like a not so subtle way of sticking it to anti Felicity fans, but that’s just me.

Source: fatedxdestiny

SIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE YOU BEEN BABY GIRL? Honestly, my biggest annoyance with these return guest star scenes is we didn’t get much of an update on where the characters are at. Does Sin have a home now? Does she know Sara is alive? I have questions.

Sin was a fairly minor character in Season 2 and even more so in Season 3, but seeing her brings back all those Season 2 memories.

Memories, Like the corners of my mind Misty water-colored memories

Sorry. Sidetracked by Barbara Streisand.

Again, the use of Sin is brilliant because she represents the people Team Arrow has saved. We spend a lot of time on Oliver’s mistakes. We remember all the people Oliver couldn’t save and how deep those losses cut him. However, we seldom talk about those he has saved and Oliver has saved THOUSANDS – maybe even millions. The man deserves a cookie at the very least. Sin is a box of double chocolate chip.

Oliver is not the only unmasked vigilante – Ragman is too. He’s out doing good, but the people know he’s Ragman. We don’t know if he unmasked before or after Oliver, but I would bet after. Oliver is always the first domino to fall in this universe.

Rory’s interview is super short and is therefore criminally underused. He is primarily used to set up the Star City Slayer. Ragman’s mask is among the first Oliver found. Even the angles on his documentary interview have an artistic/retrospective/forlorn feel to it like we are seeing someone who is gone. I swear to God if this serial killer killed my Rory I am going to light things on fire and throw them. I’m not even sure killing Curtis will ease my pain (but it’ll help).

Rory’s albeit short message is pretty simple as is the premise of this show.

“People need help.”

What matters is there are those in the city willing to help the helpless (NAME THAT SHOW). Their methods matter less. Rene, Curtis and Dinah COMBINED still do not compare to Rory Regan. How we ended up with those three louts and lost that beautiful sparkling jewel of a character remains a mystery and still chaps my ass.

Source: fatedxdestiny

Who invited Bart? I am only tolerating his appearance because he needs to pay his respects, but – UNBELIEVABLY DAMAGED??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? YOU BETTER COME UP WITH SOMETHING BETTER THAN THAT YOU LITTLE DICKHEAD BECAUSE YOU WOULDN’T HAVE A SHOW WITHOUT THE UNBELIEVABLY DAMAGED OLIVER QUEEN. Oh wait he’s still talking. Rewind... alright, Barry said some nice stuff. I’m better now.

Honestly, just the way this scene played it’s like the writers anticipated all my yelling after “unbelievably damaged.” They wrote the rest of the scene like Barry was reacting to my yelling as he cleaned up his statement. HAHAHA. That’s damn right fool. I’ll come for your ass. You better run.

If you’re going to pick a character among the four shows Arrow has launched I guess you go B*rry All*n. It makes a statement about Arrow’s influence on the DCTV universe, which I appreciate for the 150th episode. This was something extremely lacking in the 100th episode. Arrow is the reason a whole lot of people have jobs, so it’s an apropos time to pay due respect.

We’re constantly stuck in this Barry is light and Oliver is dark comparison and it annoys me to no end because I don’t believe either character is that clear cut. Both men have light and dark. But I do love how Barry acknowledges that the darkness Oliver survived also fuels his light.

Oliver Queen is incredibly protective. He doesn’t want anyone to suffer like he did, which includes not only his family and friends but strangers. Oliver uses his pain for good. He finds the light in the darkness, which why I love him so much.

Barry isn’t saying anything Felicity or Diggle haven’t already said for years. However, as the likely pass-the-torch candidate, Barry is commending the essence of Oliver in a way the insanely disrespectful crossover failed to do. Of course, we all know there is a reason for this disrespect – Oliver must be persecuted even by those who “know” him before he can be seen as the Messiah of superheroes.

But we are Arrow fans. We know the truth. We see Oliver for who he truly is and for just one moment, in this 150th episode milestone, the comic f*ckboys’ fuzzy bunny, rainbow puking superhero acknowledged the truth.

Also his faux shock about Oliver being the Green Arrow was hilarious.

Source: flashallens

Diggle and the Newbies

Sweet holy Moses. There are times this show is so tone deaf it truly blows my mind. It’s sort of like watching Wile E Coyote barrel off the mountain top. Does he see the ledge or does he simply not care there is a ledge? These are my deep thoughts for the day.

Diggle didn’t even know Emiko was Oliver’s sister. That’s where we’re at folks! These two brothers could finish each other’s sentences and predict one another’s movements at one point, but now they are like strangers. Ugh, I hate this. FIX IT NOW.

Arrow is going to fix Diggle in an extremely Arrow way. Anyone who has listened to Watchover with Jen & Calli knows this is what we said would happen. The writers are never going to dive deep like I do in these reviews. For one, they aren’t crazy and two it just ain’t the show fam. The Arrow way of fixing a problem is:

1. Pretending it never happened.

2. Slap a bow on it and call it fixed without doing any of the actual character development to earn the moment.

Annnnd that’s what we got. Things are a little tense between Diggle and Oliver. John is put out Oliver didn’t clue him in about Emiko, even though he’s known for about a month. Oliver correctly points out Diggle hasn’t run in his circle for the better part of a year, so he gets the info when he gets it. YASS! PREACH IT SON.

John at least has the good sense to admit what Oliver said was true. He also decides this superhero slayer is too much for the SCPD to handle (isn’t everything though?) and it’s time to get the band back together.

Source: legends-of-today

There’s some back and forth between the two men about the other team members risking jail, but Oliver going to prison never sat right with Diggle.

Source: fatedxdestiny

It is good John is acting honorably, steadfastly having Oliver’s back, and just generally dispensing some good old fashioned Yoda wisdom.

However, he says what has to be the most ridiculous line I have heard on this show in a loooong time.

“Oliver when you were in jail we had each other’s backs.”

I swear to God I screamed. And then I fell off the chair laughing because NONSENSE.

Arrow ignores its own storyline when it doesn’t fit with the goals of the episode. It’s so blatantly obstinate and counter to what their audience wants, hell I almost admire them a little for it.

Writers: The storyline is not what you’ve witnessed on screen. The storyline is what we tell you and that will change week to week.

Us: Umm that’s not how television works but okay. Have at it.

Obviously, the writers wanted to reunite Team Arrow in a very “Ra Ra Go Team!” way, but haven’t done any of the leg work so the moment feels earned or makes any sense at all.

Of course, the team didn’t have each other’s backs.

Diggle abandoned Felicity and was upset when any of her attempts to free her husband interfered with his useless A.R.G.U.S. soldiering. His annoyance, admonishments, refusals of help and threats weren’t limited to Felicity. It also included anyone who helped Felicity like Rene, Bl*ck S*ren and Emiko. He also did bupkis to help free Oliver from prison. But okay, you had their backs John.

Maybe he’s speaking about Curtis who joined A.R.G.U.S. John seemed okay with Dinah policing. Perhaps he has a highly compartmentalized way of looking at team support. Regardless, it’s a ludicrous statement and is one that makes you wonder if the Arrow writers actually watch Arrow.

But as I said, we were expecting this because this is typically what Arrow does. Sometimes they force the story even when its counter to everything we’ve seen for weeks on end. That’s what happened in “Emerald Archer.” The writers are done with the team fighting. They want everyone to reunite and rebuild the team, so it has to begin with Oliver and Diggle.

Team Arrow started with the two of them, which is why they repeated their iconic handshake basked in the sunlight. And yes, to a certain extent what Diggle said is true. They are family and families fight, but it doesn’t mean you stop being a family.

Source: legends-of-today

But you also don’t get to act like a selfish jackass for the better part of a year and then sweep it all away by playing the family card. Families have to work through their issues by 1) being honest about what those issues are 2) talking about the issues 3) and apologizing. The writers missed steps 1 through 3.

The scene felt like Oliver was apologizing to Diggle when really it should be the other way around. When did this become about Oliver’s mistakes and not John’s? Am I watching the right show? Let’s not forget in the midst of all this bromance healing the one who really needs an apology is Felicity.

I’m not too mad because I don’t think this is the end of the conversation. I think Arrow put the cart before the horse and reunited Oliver & Diggle before they actually dealt with their issues, but what else is new? They decided it was time for the reunion because it was the 150th episode. Uhhh... okay then.

It’s entirely possible additional conversations are coming though. Hopefully ones including Felicity. Diggle still has to confess about Diaz, which he was about to do but was interrupted. It should drop a bomb on OTA and kick up some very much needed, no holds bar, come to Jesus style drama. We have ten episodes to go which is a lot of season left. I haven’t given up completely on Diggle’s arc for this year.

But also, I’m tired y’all. If they aren’t going to examine John’s actions with a modicum of reflection then I’d prefer for it to be over as quickly and painlessly as possible because this is terrible storyline. I’m sick of Pod Diggle. I miss his friendship with Oliver and Felicity. I hate whatever the hell he’s doing at A.R.G.U.S. I’m tired of everyone doing their own thing. I miss OTA. I want the show to go back to vigilantes hunting bad guys.

And yes, that goes for the Newbies too. They aren’t going away – well two of them aren’t. Arrow is completely ignoring all of their horrible behavior in Season 6, so fine. They will never resolve this storyline to my satisfaction so let’s just be done with it. Does the reunion fall flat because Arrow refuses to deal with the consequences of the Newbies’ actions in a truthful way? Yes. But I can’t care more than the writers do. So, I’m done. Moving on.

This will not preclude me from snarking however. Nothing ever will stop the snark. Dinah and Rene were in rare form in “Emerald Archer.” Both were pretty snotty.

I actually liked Rene’s interview, but then he has the nerve to cop an attitude with Oliver. Apparently, Oliver didn’t fawn over Rene enough. This is their first conversation since Oliver’s release and Rene is bitching about Oliver not asking how he is. FOR REAL???? There is only one person who should be asking how the other is doing and it’s the one who turned state’s evidence.

He’s also annoyed Oliver has gainful employment with the police department while Rene “I Can’t Go Down That Road With You Hoss” Ramirez is left out in the vigilante cold. POOR BABY. Maybe if you hadn’t sold Oliver out to the feds the team could have stayed together.

Dinah cops an attitude as well (pun intended). Oliver is about to share deeply personal information with her and admits he’s had the information for some time. Dinah says it’s par for the course with him. ANY NEW SECRET BOYFRIENDS DINAH? I do not know where the Newbies got the idea they were on the moral high ground, but this horrific writing keeps perpetuating that myth. For the love of God writers REWATCH SEASON 6.

On to happier developments.

Source: legends-of-today

Curtis called Oliver a hero, had a cool moment with his T-spheres and remarked about being a team “even if it was for one last time.” Cue close up and Oliver looking fondly at him as if Curtis was already a ghost. Of course, he’s talking their impending jail sentences for breaking the anti vigilante laws, but we know different. CURTIS IS GONNA DIIIIIIIIIIIE.

I was supposed to be pressed when Diggle, Curtis and Rene were arrested, but they all were annoying me so they can go to prison.

Finally the show does away with one of their more ridiculous plot holes. The mayor deputizes all of Team Arrow so they can fight crime in leather, but legally. Did she not see all the other times Team Arrow saved lives? They are only worthwhile if they are saving her life? They are friends with the DA too. BS is not going to press charges. So, why even have a law the DA won’t enforce? You know what? I’m not even gonna go there. Whatever.

It took Dinah several episodes to show some loyalty, but she was prepared to resign if her friends went to jail. Of course, Oliver “I’m Trying To Be Jesus” Queen puts his head on the chopping block again for these dinks too.

“After speaking with my family, I’m here to turn myself in.”

YOU SEE HOW EASY THAT WAS OLIVER? NOT SO HARD IS IT BIG BOY? THY NAME IS CHARACTER GROWTH!

Here’s something I’ve been mulling over. Clearly some of the Newbies are here to stay and a great deal of the 150th episode was devoted to this concept of legacy.

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

These characters exist so what Oliver has built can live on beyond him. It doesn’t automatically equate to Dinah, Rene and Curtis being good characters, but Arrow is incredibly invested in the idea of Oliver Queen’s legacy.

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

We want the show to be about Oliver, Felicity and Diggle. They want the show to be about more than Oliver, Felicity and Diggle. And thus an immovable force meets an unstoppable object.

The problem is Arrow, once again, is putting the cart before the horse. They are focusing on Oliver’s legacy (and all the superhero characters he’s launched), but he hasn’t achieved what he set out to do. Camelot doesn’t exist yet! Oliver’s legacy can’t be built until the dream is achieved. There’s still work to be done. We need to focus on Oliver, Felicity and Diggle before worrying about the next generation. I wish Arrow could do both at the same time, but they can’t.

Do I think we’ll ever get that kind of focus? Nope. Arrow is committed to these new characters and their definition of legacy. It is what it is my friends. Either I make my peace with it or turn the channel, I guess.

Flash Forwards

Blackstar’s name is Mia. I couldn’t be happier.

I still think it could be a nickname for Moira, but they aren’t going to cough up that golden nugget yet. Obviously, yes all the comic f*ckboys are going to think she’s Mia Dearden and Oliver’s ward. Go ahead and keep thinkin’ that. We’ll see who lands on top.

Source: smoakmonster

Mia obtained a bootleg copy of the outlawed vigilante documentary and she practically bored holes into the television watching her father speak. There is no other reason to shoot the scene like that, with Oliver reflecting in Mia’s eyes, if she’s not his child. The shot clearly communicates a connection to OLIVER. She wants to find the location of Team Arrow’s bunker and the video provides the necessary clues.

Source: amunetblack

JJ, Diggle and Lyla’s son, makes his flash forward debut and he tags along with Mia. I felt a protective vibe from him. I think Mia gets into trouble all the time and JJ tries to keep her out of it, but absolutely they are ride or die. I may have been picking out wedding dresses for her during the scene. If Arrow does not put Diggle’s son and Oliver’s daughter together and make OTA in-laws then it is a crime against humanity.

I don’t know why JJ is going by Connor Hawke. He adopted the moniker in the Legends alternate future because he didn’t feel worth of the name John Diggle Jr. Frankly, I think Connor Hawke is a code name similar to Blackstar and the sole function of it is to make us think John is dead. But we know Diggle is alive because David let the cat out of the bag. *blows kisses to that beautiful man*

Mia hates vigilantes because the vigilante lifestyle stole her father and childhood. Simple is that.

Source: amunetblack

I don’t have all the answers yet. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know how the Queen family was separated. I don’t know why William doesn’t know his own sister, but I certainly wasn’t expecting Mia to call Oliver “Dad” anymore than she would call Felicity "Mom” at this point. Answers lead to more questions and I am perfectly content with Arrow revealing the truth when they are good and ready.

If you refuse to believe Mia is Oliver and Felicity’s daughter, fine. If you are convinced she’s Bl*ck S*ren’s daughter, fine.

There is literally no evidence they hired the lead of Shadowhunters to play a supporting character’s daughter, but go off I guess. And no, Oliver is not cheating on Felicity with BS. Take that nonsense somewhere else.

They held off on introducing JJ because Diggle is one of the three main characters, but sure they’re keeping Bl*ck Si*en’s kid a secret. Not Oliver and Felicity’s kid, ya know, the characters who are the male and female leads of the show. Nope. Bl*ck S*ren’s daughter is the big surprise.

It doesn’t automatically make them mother and daughter simply because Bl*ck S*ren was singing the anti vigilante party line and Mia hates vigilantes. By that logic, Diaz, Quentin and the Mayor all have a shot at Mia being their progeny. If BS was as anti vigilante as she said then she would have pressed charges against Diggle, Curtis and Rene. She didn’t. Thank you. Next.

My point is I am convinced she is their daughter. Every episode just adds more evidence. My belief is unwavering. You won’t convince me otherwise, so save yourself the energy. You believe what you want and I’ll believe what I want. Then we’ll see how it shakes out in the end.

Stray Thoughts

Director Pedowitz might be one step over the meta line, but also hahaha.

Documentary intro was sweet. Can we make that the permanent one? Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

Did they reshoot old fight scenes for the documentary? That feels like a lot of work. I wonder if it was film they had on hand but didn’t use from the old episodes. Either way it looked legit and I was impressed. Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

Slightly odd how Oliver or anyone else on Team Arrow never mentioned they are being followed around by a camera. That’s just details. Imma let it go.

It is official. Star City knows Oliver is the Hood, the Arrow and the Green Arrow. We can stop debating. This means these thankless twiddle twits know he saved them from Merlyn, Slade, Ra’s Al Ghul and Damien Darhk. HOW MANY MORE TIMES DOES HE NEED TO SAVE YOUR SORRY ASSES TO GET SOME RESPECT?

Why does no one ever remember the undertaking on this show? Moira Queen admitted to a long term plan, led by Malcolm Merlyn, to destroy the Glades. This plan was hatched while Oliver Queen was on the island. No wait BEFORE the island. There was a freaking trial! How the hell does this make the Undertaking Oliver’s fault Madame Mayor?

Overwatch is back and the world makes sense again. Source: arrowdaily

Oliver shading Curtis with Felicity's superior abilities is LIFE AFFIRMING. Source: olicitygifs

Bl*ck C*nary fighting looks equally as ridiculous on documentary film as she does on regular film, so that question is answered and we can go on with our lives.

I really can't listen to Bl*ck S*ren pretending to be E1 L*urel Lnce. It's too annoying. Zip it fishnets.

I can’t pin point what “season” Thea’s interview was filmed during and it’s kind of bugging me, so hit the comments with your guess.

I’m not talking about Diaz. I cannot even believe they included him in the documentary. He’s gone here for a minute.

Didn’t love the Annie Hall look on Dinah. Misfire. Source: redfield5x5

One of the reasons why writers choose to film a faux documentary is so their characters can constantly tell the camera operator to turn the camera off. It’s a trademark of the trope.

“We need to come up with a better name immediately.” PREACH IT SON.

Baby William and Baby Zoe making friends is adorbs. Rene is all worried William is gonna make a move on Zoe. First of all, they are like 14. Calm down. Second of all, William is a short stop for the other team, but feel free to twist yourself into a pretzel Rene. The wasted energy will amuse me enormously. Source: feilcityqueen

This serial killer seems to collect masks regardless of whether or not the vigilante is actually dead, so I’m holding out hope Rory Regan is alive.

The documentary film shots of the fight scene were AMAZING. The last action scene was pretty sweet. It was nice seeing the team work together cohesively again. Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

I know I’ve said this before but Rene and Emiko are so happening.

“Fans have a strange way of showing their affection.” Oh yeah this guy was a hired gun by Stan the Fan. Kevin Meltzer was recently released from a psychiatric hospital which I am sure Stan has seen the inside of a time or two. No way is that line a coincidence. Or it’s a commentary on fandom. One or the other.

I had no idea Dinah’s vigilante identity was still secret.

Hahaha. Rene didn't know Emiko was related to Oliver. He's the new L*urel. I just decided.

Bl*ck S*ren agrees to give an interview for the documentary, but later on acts like she didn't agree to be on the documentary and threatens the camera operator. Yeah, that sounds about right.

This cupcake owns my heart. Source: ebett

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