This is barbaric! This is no way for grown men to settle… oh, fine! Let’s just haul out our swords and start banging away at each other! That will solve everything! I’ve had it! I’ve had it with wobbly-legged, rum-soaked pirates!
One: because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two: that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire Royal Navy is out looking for me. Do you really think there is even the slightest chance they won’t see it?
At least when Filavandrel's blade kissed my throat, I didn't shit myself. Which is all I can hope for you, good lords. At your final breath, a shitless death.