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dislyteshack · 10 months

Text

Another fic

Angst Pining Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism Drinking Sad Ending Dreams Suggestive Themes

Language:

English

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He couldn't sleep again.

He would check the time had he not done so twice now in the same five minute span.

Now he's sitting up, now facing a clock that barely registered as midnight. It wasn't rare if he went days without sleep even, no matter how tired his soul and body were.

Yun Chuan didn't want to admit this to anyone else in the Union, that his habit of drinking went deeper than just something he wanted to do.It was something he needed, he wouldn't sleep these days without a drink.

He swore to himself he'd stave off drinking but attempting to fall back to sleep wasn't working out at this point. It'd let him have those dreams again.

dreams of a different time, of an old flame now lost. hands cupped against his cheek , sweet nothings whispered inches from his ear .

It was wrong, this should be wrong. He knows what Xiao had done to him, yet the memory of the man who saved him, the version of xiao who cared for him chuan could never forget

He resented what he did, he also resented himself for wishing to forgive him.

At the cliffs, the temptation to stay was almost too strong for Chuan to resist. Walking away after the harm he caused by his own fists took almost every bit of willpower he had

The past seems so preferable, he wants to think he's moved on. That he's never regretted any of his decisions yet his thoughts lingered

Wishing for the dark shadow to clear over and allow them both to pick up where they left off.

Where they were happier-

He shot out of his bed to reach for where he'd hidden a stash away. The familiar burning taste of wine met him, straight from the bottle he indulged himself

It would just be a few drinks

…. Or a few bottles

Baiju stopped having a burning taste a long time ago, and with his transformation? Health risks were a non-issue when blessed by a diety

He doesn't remember when he last checked the clock, he's been at this for what felt like hours.

He just wants to pass out in this dorm, to retreat in his mind.

A thud met the floor after the lastest one's contents had been half emptied, its liquid contents spilling out. Chuan has since returned to his bed seated and hunched over, he reached futilely to retrieve it

His dog had awakened from his own slumber, whether on his own free will or because screamer had sensed his owner's sadness, chuan didn't have the mindset to ponder

The hound nudged the bottle away from arms reach, signalling to chuan that he'd reached a limit in its mind

The world was getting blurry, Chuan was furrowing his brows for clarity. How pathetic he looks in that moment, a hero consumed by their vices. allowing the memory of a coward to control him.

The humiliation was almost as bad as the pain he feels inside It burns up and down in his throat

The soft touch of a familiar hand began to rest on his chest, a figure sitting above him. Dream and reality no longer mattered

His eyes look up to face pools of crimson, white streaks of hair with black sprinkled in trailed down their shoulders

Yun chuan began to reciprocate by wrapping his arms around them

"Please…. Stay with me this time"

It was a desperate plea

There was no response from the figure…li xiao never responded to him

Soon ,he'd be engulfed in ghostly touches; teasing and coy . This was the part of the routine he adores the most, one moment he allows himself to surrender to the vixen

Yun chuan was holding on by a thread, a whine slipped past his lips. These touches weren't enough anymore, years of the same dream was maddening.

"Xiao …"

His voice shook, a great contrast to how he acted usually .

Xiao's careful hands guided Chuan to the edge of his bed, his back meeting with the bed frame.

Those gentle hands went to work once again, with Chuan as his puppet; the puppeteer repositioned him to his whim, allowing their legs to intertwine. Each touch by the other was heaven, pure electricity that could break down even the strongest of wills

His heart was so heavy in his chest , it was pounding so fast as well

he swore if he ever let go, xiao would be gone too. He didn't want that, he couldn't lose him again. His head buried into the crook of the other's neck, savouring every last drop of love unlimited

Chuan hated how his voice cracked as he tried to continue,detested how he stumbled over his words to profess his love even as the image of Li xiao became harder to visualise

He wants to stare into those pools of scarlet, he wants to be lost in them, this was his reality.

This is the reality he wants, the reality Yun chuan sees. He pushes down any part of himself that tries to argue

And now just to cement his reality, he begs for a response. Anything to be given back, his eyes looked on in awe and expectedly

And was met with nothing

silence

Xiao's form was loosening and in distress, Yun chuan scrambled to keep it together, to salvage his reality.

Nonononono not again

He can't go back

'i can't go back '

Not this again

Please

He begs for him to stay again

He makes promises he can't keep

Nothing works

Nothing ever convinces him to stay

….

It was all blank space

His arms were wrapped around air and only air

A dream

A dream he lost once again, just as he lost the previous one , always just out of reach.

Shame creeped up on him.He couldn't help the tears that gathered at the corners of his eyes and slid down his cheeks in an endless stream.

A nudge…Chuan didn't want to look up, whimpering from screamer was hardly registered.

He really was pathetic, he tore his eyes away from the hound. Chuan wished not to fall back asleep again with the knowledge that even his dog knew he was hurting

In reality, he'd curled up in his bed, Holding onto himself, for a false recreation of what could have been.

#dislyte #dislyte yun chuan #dislyte fanfic #fanfiction #pining

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mutedwoodlands · 11 months

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Jin Quan / Human Screamer (Oldish) [AU/ OC?]

Some older unfinished art of my version of human Screamer. He’s the esper of, Xiaotian Quan, like Screamer technically is, but human.

Would this be considered an OC? It’s kind of what he’s become, but he’s still very heavily based on Screamer- since that’s who he is in a sense. He has is own lore, and I’m trying to make a backstory, so if you guys wanna know more about him, just let me know.

I made him back in March with some help from my friend @dislyteshack

Sorry if his design is bland! I didn’t know what to draw him wearing, but I felt like he’d dress like Yun Chuan and Li Ling. I still need to come up with some cooler cloths!

If you have any questions, feel free to ask!

Ps. Please don’t say anything weird about him. Yes he has muscles, and he’s he shows skin (Like Yun Chuan and Li Ling do), but that doesn’t warrant any weird comments. He is based on Screamer (a dog), and I, the artist, am a minor.

Anyways look at my silly!!! I love him!!

If you guys like him I will gladly do an art dump of all the oldish drawings I have of him!

#art #dislyte #dislyte fanart #Dislyte oc #Jin Quan #screamer dislyte #Dislyte Yun Chuan #Dislyte li Ling #dislyte screamer

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