#she's just so fucking mean wtf

[reallydumbdannyphantomaus]

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Spectra sucks. Dunno what else to tell you. (ao3) (masterpost)

Part 3: Chapter 1

“So,” Danny said as they approached Casper High, “today's the first day with the shrink?”

Kwan groaned, then clutched at his side as his rib ached. He’d been cleared to return to school, but was supposed to limit his activity. No gym, or stairs, and Danny was carrying his backpack for now. It was more annoying than regular school. “Don't remind me,” he said. “Let's talk about your creepy half-ghost uncle again instead.”

“Low blow, dude. Also, definitely not my uncle.”

“That's right, he's your future stepdad!”

Danny shoved lightly at him, careful to avoid his bad side. “How did you manage to go even lower?”

“It's a talent,” he said. “Besides, there is at least some good news from the whole Vlad-thing.”

“Oh yeah? What?”

“You probably aren't going to destabilize and dissolve any time soon!”

“Well, gee, thanks for reminding me of that possibility.”

“Always happy to help.”

They lapsed into silence as they crested the hill. Kwan's appointment was scheduled for immediately after school; his detentions with Lancer had been postponed on account of both the other teacher's continued hospital stay and Tyson dying. Thus, Principal Ishiyama had said he could use that time instead for his therapy.

Ugh. Therapy.

“So how long are you gonna see her for?”

“Who?”

“The shrink.”

“Right,” Kwan said. “I convinced my mom to let me have just a thirty minute appointment to start.”

“Cool,” Danny said. “I'll be waiting? At the big oak?”

Something warm bloomed in Kwan's chest. Dash would never have waited for him, even if he'd asked. Danny always waited, after detention and now with this stupid counseling. Maybe it was because they were both each other's only friends, but still. It was... nice. “Yeah,” he said, voice breaking in a way that he could only hope Danny hadn't noticed. “I'll find you after.”

Walking into first period gym with a doctor’s note, Kwan still couldn’t help but smile.

-----

“You're in a good mood,” Valerie said at their lab table, measuring out the baking soda.

Kwan startled, twinging his still-healing rib, then looked around to see who she was talking to.

“I'm talking to you, dumbass.”

“Since when?”

“I can always stop.”

Kwan raised an eyebrow. “Then why start at all?”

“Well, with... recent events—I don't know.” Valerie stared at her hands and dropped her voice. “Paulina lost it on Dash. For crying at Tyson's thing.”

“Yeah,” Kwan said with a wince. “I kinda figured.”

“Yeah, me too. But then, I started thinking... what the fuck kind of relationship do we have where that was expected?” Valerie sniffed. “She wouldn't even let me talk, y'know? I had a lot to say.”

“Val...” Kwan reached for her hand.

She jerked it back. “I'm not saying you're right or anything. Just—you knew him. And her. And you're not dating her. So.”

“So I was your best option to complain to?”

“I guess. I'm not gonna abandon her. Them.” The like you did was blessedly unspoken. “But, I don't know. Maybe—maybe I don't really blame you anymore.”

“Okay,” Kwan said. “But you can't talk to me if you want to stay her friend. You know that, right?”

“Obviously.” Valerie rolled her eyes. “But we're lab partners. We have to talk sometimes. For class.”

Kwan hid a grin. “Of course.”

“Of course.”

Valerie finished measuring out the materials and passed them to Kwan. “So,” she said, “what’s got you in a good mood?”

“Nothing!” Kwan squeaked. He could feel the heat rising to his face.

“Oh?” Valerie leaned toward him, a teasing smile dancing around her lips. “Did you finally boink Fenton?”

“Boink?”

“So you did.”

“No!” Kwan waved his hands around desperately. “We’re just friends.”

Valerie gave him a calculating stare. “Hm,” she said. “Too bad.”

“You want us to—”

“Me? I don’t care. You, however, clearly do.”

Somehow, his face got even hotter. “I don’t!”

“Kwan,” Valerie said, “you are somehow even more obvious about this than you were about your crush on Dash, and I watched you give him a massage once just because he mentioned his shoulders were a little stiff.”

“What—I didn’t—”

“Kwan. Kwan, look at me.” Valerie leaned down and made sure that she was looking Kwan in the eyes. “Did you… not know you had a crush on Dash?”

“I—” Kwan stopped himself and thought back to the way his eyes had always sought out Dash first and foremost whenever he entered a room. The way he reached for Dash’s hands and his arms whenever he could get away with it. The beating of his heart when Dash smiled.

“Fuck,” he said. “I liked Dash?”

Valerie bent over with laughter. “Congratulations!” she said, gasping for breath. “You’re officially the last to know. Well, aside from Dash.”

Kwan buried his head in his hands. “Oh my god. I had a crush on Dash.”

He felt an awkward patting on his back. “Yeah. You sure did.”

“And… you think I have one on Danny?”

“Dude. You should see your face when you look at him. Or think about him. It’s disgusting.” She fished out her phone and turned on the front facing camera, shoving it in his face. “You’re literally making it right now, look.”

The Kwan on the camera mostly looked confused at having a camera shoved in his face.

“Okay, so you look constipated now,” Valerie said. “Whatever. Just trust me. You looked soft as hell like two seconds ago.”

Kwan thought about it. He thought about long nights, staying up and trying to finish homework except they kept getting distracted by trying to one-up each other’s jokes. He thought about how Danny watched football with him even though he didn’t understand it, how he tried to play Doomed even though he sucked because it made Danny happy. He thought about Danny, saving his life from the ectopus, from the Lunch Lady, from the shapeshifting gorilla ghost.

He thought about Danny smiling. He thought about Danny laughing. He thought about the warmth in his chest whenever he saw Danny.

Well. Shit.

“There it is again!” Valerie pulled back out her phone just as Kwan buried his face back in his hands. “Dammit, are you conspiring against me getting a picture of your smitten face?”

“Valerie,” Kwan said through his hands, “I’ve got a crush on Danny.”

“Once again,” Valerie said, “congrats on being the last to know.”

“As glad as I am to see you two talking again,” Ms. Okorafor said, startling Kwan and Valerie, who had both missed her approach, “I do need you to do the lab today.”

“Right,” Kwan said.

“Yeah, sure,” Valerie said.

Like a spell had been broken, they went back to doing their lab in silence. Still, Kwan caught Valerie’s eye from across the table and she smiled, just a little.

It felt like progress.

-----

Kwan hadn’t expected to wait to see Dr. Spectra, but the student before him had still been inside when he arrived in her office. So he was stuck in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs right outside, with an odd little man with gray hair and green eyes staring him down.

Kwan shifted in his seat, then groaned as his rib ached again. Right. Keep his torso steady.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the door opened and out stepped… Dash.

Dash spotted Kwan, then turned his nose up. Dash wasn’t having doubts like Valerie, then.

Still, with Dash pointedly ignoring him, Kwan had the opportunity to study his face. He’d had most of the day to come to terms with his old crush on Dash, but now he wanted to see if those feelings were still there or not. He didn’t think they were, but he hadn’t known about them to begin with, so his judgment was clearly not the best.

But instead of renewed feelings, he found tear tracks on Dash’s cheek.

Right. Of course. Dash was here to talk about Tyson. That made sense, because the two were still friends. Unlike Kwan and Tyson, who hadn’t spoken in over a month.

Kwan bit back a sigh of frustration. Why had Mom insisted he be here, instead of letting someone else who actually needed it take this time slot? He didn’t really understand why she was so insistent that something had to be wrong.

Whatever. He was here, and he’d promised, so he’d do it. He just didn’t have to be happy about it, was all.

He stood up as Dash walked out, waved on by the odd secretary. He knocked on the door twice and a voice called out, “Come in, please!”

The room itself looked like any other office. He’d half-expected to see one of those long couches designed for lying down like he’d seen in movies, but this was a public school. They would never be able to afford that. Instead, there were two more of those uncomfortable plastic chairs right in front of Dr. Spectra’s desk, which was scrupulously clean. The walls were covered in generic motivational posters. The one right behind Dr. Spectra’s head had a picture of a young oak tree with BELEAF IN YOURSELF written on the bottom.

And, of course, Dr. Spectra herself sat at the desk in a high-backed office chair. Her hair was bright red and her eyes the same shade of green as her assistant. Maybe they were related somehow?

“Hi there,” Dr. Spectra said, gesturing for Kwan to sit down. “You’re Kwan, right?”

Kwan dropped in the chair in front of her desk, barely restraining from rolling his eyes. “Yeah,” he said. “That’s my name.”

“Lovely to meet you, honey.” Dr. Spectra looked at him from over her glasses. “Now, why are you here today?”

“Because my mom thinks I have problems.”

“Do you?”

Kwan shrugged. “Doesn’t everyone? Mine aren’t any worse than anyone else’s though, so I don’t get the point of this.”

Dr. Spectra hummed. “Well, therapy doesn’t have to be just about feeling better. It can be about being better, too.”

“What do you—”

“I mean, I’ve heard from your classmates who’ve come to see me that you recently lost all your friends? Had a fight with them?”

“Well, yeah, but—”

“Including the poor student that passed recently?”

Kwan flinched. “I guess you could say that.”

“Oh, sweetie,” Dr. Spectra cooed. “I don’t mean anything by it. Just mentioning it because I thought you might have some… regrets.”

Regrets? Sure, he had plenty. Mostly about being a dick since the start of middle school. But he didn’t regret dumping his old friends. They deserved it, and he needed to be better.

“My friends sucked,” he said after a long moment. “I wanted to be better. They were the ones who chose not to change. That’s on them, not me.”

“Of course, of course,” Dr. Spectra said. “You’re on a journey of self-discovery! Very commendable.” Her smile stretched across her teeth.

Kwan bit his lip to keep from sighing. So far, this grief counselor wasn’t impressing him much.

“I just thought that maybe,” she said, “you felt like you could have done something to stop this tragedy from happening.”

Kwan stiffened. “Why—what makes you say that?”

“Oh, it’s very common. Survivor’s guilt. I thought you might feel like since you stopped being friends with poor Tyson, you weren’t there with him the day he died. Maybe you could’ve saved him if you were.”

“Why would I think that?!” Kwan’s fingers dug into his arms. If possible, Dr. Spectra’s smile stretched even wider.

“Oh dear, of course it isn’t true. I just thought it would be a reasonable response to a horrible situation. That’s all.”

Could Kwan have done more? He was at the mall that day, after all. He had advance warning. He’d gone along with his mom, and let her take Danny away, instead of letting Danny help. He hadn’t just not saved Tyson, he’d helped prevent the only person who could have saved Tyson. Mom hadn’t seen for herself how useless the Fentons were, but Kwan had. Kwan knew that Danny was their best chance, and Kwan had packed him away in the car anyway.

Acid burbled from his stomach into his throat. He lurched forward and vomited into the trash can at the side of Dr. Spectra’s desk. His rib burned.

A hand rubbed at his back. “That’s it, dear,” Dr. Spectra said. “You’re okay.”

Kwan coughed and spat out the remnants of bile. The taste was almost bad enough to make him barf again, so he poured some water in his mouth and swished it around before spitting it into the trash along with his vomit.

“Oh,” Dr. Spectra said. “I wish you hadn't—I mean, I feel bad for the janitor who has to clean that up.” She laughed and waved her hand as though waving that idea off. “Of course, not your fault, dearie.”

Mom was so stressed now, because he'd brought this whole thing upon them. Him, not Danny. He'd dared Danny to go into the portal and all of this had happened. Danny kept getting hurt. Mom was about to collapse under the pressure of keeping them both safe. Even now, he was making Danny wait on him while he worked on his own problems.

How selfish could he be?

No, no, he'd done nice things for Danny, too. Comforted him. Helped keep his secret. Destroyed his only other friendships.

Fuck.

“Am I—am I ruining people's lives?”

“Of course not, sweetie. What on earth makes you think that?”

“I just—I was a jerk before, and I'm trying to be better, but maybe I'm not as good as I think I am. Maybe I'm only being better because it gets me what I want.”

He did have a crush on Danny, after all. Being nice to Danny was a way to get him to like Kwan more. This whole time, he'd probably been trying to get Danny's attention. He was taking up his time because he craved it, just like he'd craved whatever Dash had been willing to give him. If he really wanted what was best for Danny, he'd try to fix his actual friendships, with Manson and Foley, not hoard him all to himself.

Dr. Spectra hummed. “Well, I suppose that's possible, but it's nothing we can't fix!”

“Really?” If this was all his fault... well, of course it was. How stupid of him to think that just dumping his friends was enough to make up for anything. Instead, here he was focusing on his own happiness and making everything worse.

“Of course. I'm here to help.”

“You said, at the beginning...”

“Yes?”

“You said this didn't have to be about feeling better.” Maybe he didn't deserve to feel better. Not yet. He thought he'd gotten better, but here he was making everything worse for everyone around him. “You said it could be about being better.”

“Of course!” Dr. Spectra's smile stretched impossibly wider. “Is that something you'd like? A self-improvement focus?”

“I—yeah. Yeah, I'd like that.” He couldn't be a problem for his mom or for Danny anymore. He needed to start being a solution. If Dr. Spectra could help...

“Excellent!” She tied off the garbage bag, but Kwan could still smell the sour stench of his vomit. “Let's get started, then, shall we?”

#dp switch #danny phantom #kwantent #spectra time baby #bug posts #she's just so fucking mean wtf #my fic #my writing

[opens-up-4-nobody]

I feel like I'm losing my mind. Like this has to be a thing right? It's a thing I experience at least. Please please please tell me abt ur experience if u do 🙏

#all the literature i find is like yeah pmdd can be mistaken for bipolar but then they dont talk abt mania or hypomania #so im like ??? wtf is happening? #i mean i wasnt looking that hard but its still weird to me bc i tell my mum i possibly had a hypomanic episode and she instantly was like #hm could b hormones and she was 1000% percent right bc it happens mostly in the days before bleeding starts #so like i cant b the only one out there. and it doesnt happen all the time. and usually its not that extreme #like id say its mostly just elevated mood and it mostly just lasts like 3 days or so. so i dont think it counts as hypomania. but thats wha #ill select bc i had one time that felt so fucking crazy it felt like there was something seriously wrong with me. it was fun tho #before i crashed so hard i had to leave work in the middle of the day bc i couldnt stop crying lol #anyway. im curious #menstruation #pmdd #pms #its always depression this depression that. why the fuck do i wanna run around in circles screaming until i die? riddle me that batman

[hazel2468]

I'm feeling salty so I'm just gonna say-

If you can't handle the idea of feeding live prey to something.

Do not get a pet. That requires you. To feed it live fucking prey. There are SO MANY OTHER OPTIONS!

Also don't be that fucking weirdo who goes on other people's socials and bitches about how it's "inhumane" or "gross". They'd be doing it out in the wild. It's a little something called nature. And no, you cannot find an "alternative" for your mantis.

It's a MANTIS. It is like. One of the most famous predatory insects. It is infamous for eating its prey alive.

If you're going to be a little baby about feeding live prey. Then get a pet that doesn't need that. And shut the fuck up.

#its just annoying as fuck like #if you don't like the idea of predation in animals then like... don't get a predator #i've been in the hobby for all of a month but this shit is everywhere #and its not new! #i used to own a pair of lizards when I was in high school and I was seeing this shit back then too #because I would give them crickets once a month as a treat instead of their usual veggies #and people are so WEIRD about animals eating other animals like #wtf is wrong with people? #it's a CRICKET calm down #like sure all life is sacred yadda yadda but fucking #all life being sacred doesn't mean that death never happens #because if my mantis doesn't eat he dies #if my spider doesn't eat she dies #it's called nature you chucklefucks #Reaper Man and Bracken would both be eating bugs if they were out in the wild #Bracken is actually a species native to my general area so like #there are spoods out there RIGHT NOW eating bugs #she just gets to have a cushy life with no predators and carefully controlled humidity and big fat flies on the regular #and a cute little hide #same for Reaper Man he gets a nice cushy home and all the food he could need #and people are really out here bitching about how its cruel fuck the fuck off #if you come into the bug keeping world and whine about this I just think you're a moron

[bear-at-the-museum]

Annabeth: *let's percy get beat up and then shoves his injured ass in a lake*

Percy: we're not friends

Annabeth: *deeply offended* >:()

#idk its still early and im rewatchin the episode #its just so funny #like all shes done is bully him and then shes like #'wtf do you mean we're not friends' #and i get it #gods do i get it #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #annabeth chase #percy jackson and the olympians #i didnt even notice that was the fucked up tag until going back through them i just autoselected it #dyslexic ass fandom 😂

[dmclemblems]

“Claude in Hopes is exactly the same way he is in Houses! He’s always been like that and has the same feelings/morals!”

Claude in GW/Hopes:

Claude, literally, in Houses:

Let that speak for the fact that Claude was written with a 180 characterization in Hopes.

Claude wants peace and to bring everyone together; not to tear them further apart. That is his character.

#I’m still in the middle of answering this ask I got but yeah #even Edelgard noticed Claude really loves bringing ppl together in WC #when she says ''you really value that sort of thing don't you'' after the Eagle/Lion (+Deer >.> ) battle #like if Claude's goal was to destroy Fodlan and just leave a mess of it A+++ you did an astounding show stopping brilliantly done job #if your goal was peace well you fucked that up pretty good buddy #in Hopes too like he's literally arguing with Lorenz about it while Lorenz is like ??? bruh wtf ??? #literally who cares what some politicians did 300 years ago certainly not Houses Claude #in fact Claude said fuck our history sideways with a cactus let's make peace and be friends #AND he got the approval from the whole roundtable and that's all we know on the topic bc it's all we needed to know #versus in GW where it's explicitly stated that it took some doing for them to allow Claude to be king #meaning the roundtable was not up for what he was suggesting and needed to be convinced #they needed it enough that Lorenz pointed it out to everyone and from a narrative standpoint #AM Claude doesn't need to say how the meeting went and all we need to know is that it worked out #but in GW it's told to us that the meeting was very long and it took some doing for them to trust Claude's judgment #the meeting is presented in a more uncertain light with how the lords felt abt it whereas in AM #it's not told to us how things went bc it's not important. a negative aspect (i.e. the roundtable not being able to come to an agreement) #is an important thing to note and if there was any negative aspect of it in AM they would've put it in there #meaning the roundtable trusts AM Claude's judgment enough when he tells them he wants to put their two nations together again #idk how else to explain that so I hope you get what I mean lol #I just find it completely baffling that people actually say both Claudes are the same person and that he was always like how he is in Hopes #like you can like his character in Hopes and enjoy that portrayal of him but at least admit he's written differently you know? #I hate when I see people say that Claude fans didn't understand his character in Houses at all bc they don't like him in Hopes #when you have literal staunch polar opposite sentences coming out of his mouth in these two scenes #the Claude we get in AM is the same Claude - the same person at his core - as he is in VW and all the routes #Houses Claude does not blame whatever the fuck Leicester and Faerghus did 300 years ago on the people living in their present #he also doesn't blame Dimitri or anyone else presently in power for Daphnel #GW Claude there is just grasping at unimportant and insignificant straws to justify his invasion #pretty sure AM Claude would be like ''hey dimi lemme borrow failnaught back real quick'' and smack GW Claude with it #then kindly hand it back to Dimi and smile and wave

[blakbonnet]

-

#so we might lose Eva #I mean she is 11 which isn't young for a dog but also she's a baby and will always be #and the prognosis is capital b Bad #so I'm going to just work and work more and keep myself distracted #and look at flight tickets later to fly back home #and the world is a shitty fucking place where pets die and there is nothing you can do about it #we just got her!!! she's 3 months old and we just got her #wtf what is wrong with the universe

[hermidetta]

[ 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 ] : sender is voicing their negative opinion about a person who appears to be close with the receiver. / bernadetta von varely, as your professor, i feel it's necessary to inform you that I believe Mr. Bearkley is holding you back from your true potential. you're not shooting for the stars. you're not giving it your all, and Mr. Bearkley is enabling this behavior. Think of your untapped potential. Let's put aside our beef and focus on getting you in tip top shape.

* for you i would.

i dont have a fakedeep poetry line caption for this. ive been trying and trying to think and just cannot even make one up. odin dark of norway you have insulted mr bearkley and you simply must perish never mind i got it. uhhh something something you think you're the shit but you aren't even the fart. or how did that one go again? ah fuck never mind. here we go

professor dark is a funny little man. he wears funny flip-flops attached to his pants, he bellows from the thesaurus glued to his lungs, and he strikes poses in public that her mangled corpse could not be caught doing if all the saints and their mothers possessed her right now.

bernadetta has heard the lecture before. she has heard it from seniors and students alike, and the first half of it nearly puts her to sleep. her lips twist down in an affronted curl.

potential this, potential that. some of them mean well—she feels all the more rotten whenever they're kind—but all of them learn. they all eventually learn she's impossible to deal with. stupid, ugly, whiny, worthless. why bother?

they all give up. she is fine with that. she gave up on herself, too, ages ago. bernadetta is fine with slinking back into the shadows, letting herself be forgotten in sweet peace...

...yet when odin dark dares accuse the only friend and confidant she's had for years, her eyes snap open. bernadetta recoils, her arms tightening around the armored bear stuffy as her body half twists to obscure it from the madman.

"what are you talking about?!"  the fight in her flares up, a petite spitfire in the fray. feathers ruffled, she quips with a tiny stomp of her foot.  "mr. bearkley doesn't have anything to do with this! bernie's stupid and worthless all on her own! you don't know him, or me! so... so there! y-you can eat your fell flip-flops, mister!"

she doesn't mean that, not really. clumsy and rash on occasion as she may be, bernadetta knows—she knows, she knows so much more than she is equipped to convey. she knows she isn't being fair. she knows mr. dark only means well. she regrets every mean thing the second it flies out of her mouth, and it shows in the way her eyes fearfully flinch. but that is mostly all she really knows—she holds her sword by its knife end and wildly, frantically swings.

she freezes like she's been hit, a half-stammer of syllables caught like rocks in her mouth—sorry, i—but no, it's too late. it's always too late. she made her bed and she instantly dives into it. she staggers, she spins in the opposite direction. the rapid patter of bernadetta's boots is the last thing odin hears of her.

#fellpurpose #asks / #saradin von tag tbt #i know you said this was a shitpost but idk wtf is possessing me over here on bernadetta cuz why am i writing so much #WHYS HER MUSE GOT A DEATH GRIP ON ME #i promise she doesnt mean it mr dark she just angy. another thing btw i always picture her expressions as animal crossing villager #so when she bawls or does a huffy little stomp ITS JUST SO FUCKING ANIMAL CROSSING VILLAGER LOOKING AND NON THREATENING #LUV U SARA LUV OUR SILLIES DW SHE WUV HIM TOO I PROMISE

[bunnihearted]

sometimes i fantasize abt being the one with the clingy gf instead of being the clingy gf ㅠㅠ

#like... #getting tons of texts all the time. having playlists made for me. uhh what else do the clingy gf do??? #ask me abt every single detail of my day and life and personality. hmm write love letters to me. make a collage book w memories for me #read a book where on girl did that for the others and she belittled it and ridiculed her and i was like WTF?!?!? #if a gf did that to me i would DIE FOR HER!!!!! wtf that is so cute #i dont know sometimes i just think that'd be nice #to instead of being the clinger i'd have her clingy for me #well it's all just daydreams idk i was just imagining a scenario w a gf who blew up my phone when i was at work #i dont have a job but like it was all a fantasy lmaoooo. and ig the thought is nice bc irl #im the clingy one and i feel so anxious bc i mean im so fucking annoying and i talk way too much and i psuh everyone away being so awful #idk if 'she' would be clingy w me i like now i love her and can reassure her #so rlly its just all about me..... hmmm selfcest? 👀

[soldier-poet-king]

Should not be feeling prideful abt the fact that I treat housekeeping staff like Actual Human Beings unlike MOST of my office and therefore I got to hear all about her kids and was shyly asked if I could help design & print smthn bc her kids are coming home from college, but like, I AM, this is my crowning achievement at work but really it should just be like. The baseline of human decency. And YET.

Not to be like We Live In A Society but :/

#franposting #anyway its also like. maam. youre old enough to be my mom. im ur kids age #idgaf that i have a desk job and my own office you are clearly My Superior and i will walk across hot coals for you #everyone is SO mean esp to english as additional language learners #and im just. i will fucking kill you all #also the ABSOLUTE like. messes people leave? or just ignore the staff? dont stop and chat? #like yeah we dont speak the same language and sometimes conversations are hard but like. try ur fuckin Best #anyway this isnt even really pride this is just #rage and disgust at how middle class white collar workers treat housekeeping and maintenance #maybe i just got used to growing up poor and working class #and now working an office job im like. wtf. yall really act like this to another human being wtf #theyre not even actively rude its just like. omg dont create extra work thats not her job #stop and say hi and chat. TREAT HER LIKE A COWORKER BC SHE FUCKIN IS #SHES NOT UR GODDAM NANNY SHES A HUMAN BEING I S2G #its made worse by the fact that mt workplace is REDACTED and therefore should know/do better

[p4nishers]

can we actually take a moment and remember swan upon leda? can we actually shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down and think about our lord and savior swan upon leda because i'm tired of doing it alone every single day guys

#the title itself!!! THE FUCKING TITLE #swan UPON leda #god he's an actual genius THANK U HOZIER SO FUCKING MUCH #i hate how that myth is portrayed and received and objectified bc they make it out to be such a funny little chuckle story like 'hahaha led #is SO easy that she fell for a swan isn't that actually the funniest thing you've ever heard omg like women are literally so easy to please #whatever whatever blahblahblah yes that's fucking hilarious matthew thank u SO much for that absolutely fascinating commentary on a women #getting raped by a god really truly an amazing insight into ur pea fucking brain #like fuck sorry but i just absolutely despises how this myth is made out to be and i remember learning abt it in class and being literally #nauseated bc guess fucking what it's literally not hard to understand wtf is happening and while u r laughing away about i repeat a WOMEN #getting RAPED some fucking of us have brain enough to be mortified #jesus ANYWAY #hozier dropped that song after roe v wade was over turned and i just i love him so fucking much he cares SO MUCH and before anything else #he's an activist and he actually gives a shit about women's rights and he dropped this song as a comfort as something to hold onto but also #as a social commentary and he linked charities and resources to help women and keep them safe and this song just means everything to me #bc greek mythology often gets reduced to children stories bc most ppl know myths from children books and obviously a book for kids not gonn #outloud say the word rape or even imply that that's what's happening and that's fine ig but bc so many ppl know it from there it gets #reduces to a joke and a raped women gets ridiculed but hozier actually took one of the few poems about leda being raped and it being a rape #at all and made it into a song during a time that was so traumatizing for ever afab person in the world basically and it just says 'i see #you i see what you're going through and i'm listening and i actually care and i want to help you' and he's helping by writing a song yes bc #he's spreading the word that way bc that's how movements are spread and people listen to him when he's singing and that's how he helps and #i did i mention that i love him? bc i'd actually do anything for him and to meet him and tell him how much he fucking means to me #the line that always gets me is 'a crying CHILD pushes a CHILD into the night' bc yes she was a fucking child who had to deliver 4 KIDS BC #AN ASSHOLE DECIDED SHE WAS PRETTY ENOUGH TO FUCK and nobody ever cares that she was just a child and her child helen was just a child when #she was abducted and raped and impregnated (JUST LIKE HER MOTHER) by theseus a supposed great hero and im genuinely sick she was just a #child like so many women or girls in greek mythology and ik it was a different time back then or wtv but they were just GIRLS and nobody #cared about that or cares now. but this song does. #bc of course it does it's hozier. #hozier #swan upon leda

[da-proti-toku-grem]

why can't anyone understand that everyone is different and not everyone likes the same things and that it's completely okay AND normal for someone not to like going out and preferring to stay at home :/

#honestly i understand that my parents care about me and they don't want me to be feeling bad #and that they ask me bc they just want to make sure i'm okay #but i've explained to them what i feel like and they just don't get and i get mad but i akso know it's not their fault and just... oughhhhh #like yeah i have a weird kind of social anxiety according to my therapist and even she doesn't know exactly how to help me yet #but there are just so many reasons behind why i don't like going out and it's not just bc it gives me anxiety #or why those situations give me anxiety in the forst place #1. i'm just a very introverted person that doesn't like going out #2. crowded places/closed spaces/places where there's not enough ventilation/loud places (be it people talking or just music) overwhelme me #3. all said in 2 + flashing lights give me huge migraines that can linger for over 3 days #4. i am very much a night owl and i'm forced to live in a society where that isn't fucking acceptable apparently and i'm called lazy for - #- not being productive in the morning when the only reason behind it is that i am a lot more productive at night #but no one ket's me do that bc 'why are you doing stuff when you're supposed to be asleep?' #i have been the same since i was little. literally nothing has changed #and people where always like 'oh she's just shy' #but idk wtf changed #maybe it was that i became and 'adult' or maybe the fact that i started therapy and they told my parents that i have social anxiety. idk #but suddenly every single person in my family is worried about it and they're genuinely making me feel like there's smth wrong about me #i mean. i have my problems i'm not gonna go telling you that i'm perfect bc i'm pretty much not #but is there really smth that wrong with me that i need to fix #or is society just a bitch that doesn't understand that there's different kinds of people and everyone is different & IT'S COMPLETELY OKAY #have they ever thought about the fact that maybe these situations cause me anxiety bc i've been forced all my life to do them #even if i don't like them #instead of thinking that i don't like them BC they cause me anxiety?? #i mean. i know i have to go out more and that there's tons of things i can do ofc #but you can't just force me to do things i don't want to and put on a good face while doing it *every.fucking.day* #aaaaand i could add a lot more things but i'm once again reaching the tag limit so i shoukd just shut up #it's just driving me crazy bc i know they're trying to help but it really is not helping at all............. #ranting

[im-smart-i-swear]

webby would have LOVED mystery flesh pit national park

#my funky guys #shed be sooo fascinated w it #shed be pissed about the comercialisation of it n shit BUT. at the same time if she could take a hike in there? #she would. 100%. and shed be having a blast tge whole time #like. shed have a love hate relationship w the whole national park thing and how irresponsible the whole situation was #bc it WAS shitty and sketchy as hell #but on the other hand she just really really loves the idea of being able to walk around the insides of a colossal beast #so shed be like 'ofc nobody should be allowed to fuck around in there like that wtf dude thats so dangerous and irresponsible #.except for me. they should let ME fuck around!!! fuck the corporation and tourists i would treat her right!!!!!! #*I* would be careful and wouldnt exploit the resources and keep distance from the fauna unlike SOME PEOPLE' #ok well. i mean weblums exist so i suppose she COULD walk around the insides of a giant organism #but still the mystery flesh pit has that certain allure. a vibe. weblums are cool as hell but theyre not an eldritch underground horror #weblums are cool space whales but the mystery flesh pit is .well the mystery flesh pit. cant rlly compete w that #anyway. the pit may be a deatrap but not for her. shed survive. shes special like that the giant lobsters wouldnt eat HER #also webby would be very much on the pits side. its not ITS fault people are stupid?? its just chilling!!! its not evil!!!!!! #'ohh but those arthropods are scary!!! WELL. theyre WILD ANIMALS DIPSHIT ofc theyre hostile. and plus theyre cool as hell'

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#aaaand thats a 3rd doctor. a psychiatrist. who listened to me ans thought: mm sounds like bip0lar lol #me: wow its so easy to get diagnosed as bip0lar. thats bc u r exhibiting lots of depression and a limit amount of mood elevation. that's #like. thats what bip0lar is. she was like yea ppl with bip0lar 2 spend like 75% of time being depressed and a lil elevated mood... which #sounds like what u r describing. me: #...yeah. but again its complicated by the 0cd and spectrum issues. but she independently brought up 4dhd. just when i was like no its all #0cd. here we r again. stuck back in the messy overlap. but whatever i got proscribed bip0lar medicine. lam1ctal. we'll see #bc everyone i talk to is like. we need to control the mood 1st. like so u dont die. and im like hm yeah good call lol #she seems super cool tho. like i would love to just talk to her. ugh. she wants to get a handle on the mood and then maybe add a stimulant #bc shes had it happen in thr past where someone comes in with debiltating 0cd and got treated with lam1ctol and a stimulant and the #obsessive rumination stopped. so well see. idk if ill actually qualify as 4dhd enough. well see. fingers crossed #my mood is a lil elevated rn so its all fun. well see if we tip off a cliff bc im getting less sleep and go go going #unrelated #ugh im scared to start the medine tho bc the ssri i got proscribed fucked me up so much. which is also an indicator of bip0lar #god dammit. if this works im gonna have to actually accept the idea of being bip0lar. i mean. it makes sense being on that spectrum #is just sounds insane and i was not expecting it despite my fucking obsession with understanding wtf my deal is #idk. whatever. doesnt matter

[evilkitten3]

so i'm at my mom's and i decide to round up all the naruto volumes we have in the house (currently i've found 37, 45, 50, 51, 53, 54, 56, 58, and 60) bc that's where my brain is these days and i flipped through 'em a bit and like.

ok so in volume 53 (the birth of naruto) there's a flashback to the kyuubi attack and a bunch of people dying. we see naruto's parents (mostly kushina) monologue to him pre-kicking it, we see iruka's parents giving their lives for him, and then there's kurenai's dad.

"you're a girl so make sure you live long enough to give me grandkids" bro i hope the kyuubi got you and i hope it hurt

#naruto #we never see him again like. ever #i think he showed up in one of the databooks or something and that's why we know his name but. dude wtf #iruka's parents: it's a parent's duty to sacrifice their lives for their child #naruto's parents: we love you so much #kurenai's dad: make sure u live long enough to get knocked up #like i know it's meant to be referring to the fact that she was pregnant in canon at that point but like #the scene is set up in a way that implies that he's gonna die and that's the only thing we see him say to his daughter #what the hell man #also it's really sad that sasuke goes from genuinely caring about his teammates in vol 45 to what happens in vol 51 #like both times with karin specifically #when amaterasu hits her juugo just goes ''well she's fucked the rest of us should go right now bye karin'' #meanwhile sasuke cares so hard he figures out how to stop the fire that's whole thing is not being stoppable #then when danzou grabs her he's just. nah girl ur too slow fuck u #i mean i know a lot's been going on but yeesh man #like he saves her at least once (maybe twice? not super clear) in vol 50 #so. idk maybe seeing danzou's arm pushed him over the edge #naruto shippuden

[themyscirah]

Wait omg..... Jessica Cruz probably did rifle... my specialized sports knowledge coming in CLUTCH

Okay so I barely practiced and made it to regionals like once so im NOT the expert here but uh headcanoning that Jess did air rifle when she was a teen. Like idk if it would be as part of a team like with a high school (what I'm familiar with) vs like an individual thing vs like a travel/competitive team (it depends on the sitch in her area growing up) but she definitely went to some national matches (probably including JOs/JO quals like i think she was GOOD). I think she probably would have quit competitively following a bad shot at nationals (relatable) along with anxiety about competition (ALSO relatable) but still kept up with shooting casually for fun and relaxation and to hang out with friends etc.

She definitely would have shot smallbore competitively too but I never did that bc I was lazy so idk to much abt it competitively

#and by bad shot i mean a 0 #it hurts me to even think abt doing that during a match actually esp at fucking JOs #a girl on my team did that and im sure it was devastating (we never let her live it down after too) but like dang. i feel that pain #im just saying she would vibe sooooooo hard with rifle. like canonically they just said she did it but im talking air in particular #also in the panel they said six which first off. humphries bro thats TOO young ik youre trying to be impressive but youre talking abt rifle #here. if someones let their kid have a gun at 6 theres actually smth wrong with them. and not even a bb or smth wtf #ANYWAYS you guys haveeeee to understand this. jess would go so hard for rifle she would fit right in w every competitive shooter ive ever #met istg- #she would be out there on the porch 35° weather in full gear mid match crying w the rest of us it would be great #wait wait shoutout to the time i had to get smth from my car and there were like 4 ppl out there crying during the middle of standing #like i literally FEEL THAT SO HARD (weve all been there) but also like... awkwarddddddd #4 is an unusually large amount though. normally its like 2 ppl at a time first relay. with more 1st relay ppl crying after than during #gosh rifle omg this is making me miss it #<<<<freshman/sophomore me would kill me for saying this btw. i HATED practicing so bad then omg #OH and Jess would be a kneeling girlie. fave position. why ? bc i said so shut up #no but bc its my favorite position (yes i know its the worst okay. im aware of all the reasons kneelings sucks and why everyone hates it. #but you know what? kneeling hates everyone equally and i respect that) no but uh yeah ✌️✌️✌️✌️ #top 10 posts that are 80% jargon and only i care about 😘 #anyways this is canon to me now actually #like idc what you say she was down in the trenches (the range) w the rest of us #also ik she almost certainly would have shot paper but in my mind she practices mainly w electronic bc thats what i used (even if its super #uncommon and is only used at the nice ranges) if she was super competitive she would probably have driven to shoot electronic. lets just say #there was a paper nearby and an electronic scoring range a bit farther or smth #anyways yeah #WAIT OMG SHE DEFINITELY MET HER FRIENDS FROM HER BACKSTORY THROUGH RIFLE #and the dating drama too omg rifle drama was INSANE. like i was almost always out of the loop bc i never practiced and didnt have snapchat #but like the drama was INSANE. fucking wild. at least to my nerdy ass self. so her relationship drama makes total sense now okay babe fr #jessica cruz #blah

[storm-of-feathers]

if the branwen twins were my pharmacists id forgive my pharmacy for so much

#its been like a year but im actually still kinda angry ab the time they called me an addict to my face #well okay it wasnt said *to* me #it was said *about* me in front of me. which is kinda worse tbh?? #and then when i was like wtf she was like ''oh its just our lingo'' like bitch i know what drug addiction means. whats wrong with you #she doesnt work there anymore and i never escalated that incident (partially bc i was so shocked in the moment) but it stuck with me. #like what the hell and fuck. even if i was (still) an addict... thats irrelevant to me trying to get antibiotics for a uti. like come on. #who is out here snorting amoxicillin