#so long judas........ poor old judas..... so long judas.... poor old judas..... so long judas......... poor old judas............. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whatdoesshedotothem · 1 year

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Sunday 16 December 1832

11 ½

fine rather frostyish morning F46 ½° at 8 ½ am breakfast at 9 5 – came upstairs again in 25 minutes – read from p. 211 to 297 Foresters’ guide – cut my nails – then wrote 2 2/3 pp. to M- went downstairs at 12 and in 50 minutes read the service and sermon 22 Mr. K- and came up again at 1 ½ and finished my letter to M- 3 pages and ends - should in spite of Mr Kinnersley’s odd answer to them (the L-s) think it right to apply to him for a character of Thomas Beech - but if the same sort of thing as to the L-s, should attend to M-‘s and Granthams recommendation and take the man - no objection to give £20 wages if that is to include washing - give clothes such and so many as I think proper he would have all house work to attend to and be a good deal about me - his being able to read and write, indispensable - ‘If you think the man a sufficiently good servant as to his work, he must still be good tempered, civil and obliging, trustworthy, and sober’ - it would be a great comfort to be well suited - ‘the great inconvenience is, I can bring neither of them here - but this cannot be helped - I must contrive some way or other - and I may not be tried very immediately, for my aunt seems quite as well again as usual, and my father as likely as ever to live 2 or 3 years longer - are you really prophetic in persisting in it, that I shall never live here long together? ‘tis true, we know not what we shall do - ‘Oh blindness to the future kindly given! yet the thought of exile from poor Shibden always makes me melancholy - come what may, I have been happier here than anywhere else; and, unfortunately, I am a person of more constancy than has ever been surmised even by those supposed to know me best - But Providence orders all things wisely - I am perfectly contented, and have more and more gleams of bright assurance that even happiness is within myself, and may, and will be with me here or anywhere - But I am attached to my own people - They are accustomed to my oddities, are kind, and civilized to me, that their faults to others are, in my own case, lightened much - But..... nous verrons - a great deal will, and must depend on that someone, known or unknown, whom I still hope for as the comfort of my evening hour’ - then give the following as the about summary of expense I have been at here - mill £600, Pickersgills £300 - Southholm £80 George Naylor’s £30, James Smiths £25 Draining and wearing £60 to £80 - my walked and etc about home probably about £100 - water to Lower brea to be about £50 and other jobs - with law and agency expense shall not get off for £1300 - nothing could have been well spared but the expense about home - must go and live on bread and water - whether I shall do so, or not, is doubtful - busy just now among my young trees, pruning etc - glad the inscription was so much what she wished - glad to return to our old regularity in writing ‘at least for the time that my being in England will permit’ - had just written the above of today at 2 ¼ - mention the arrival of the Judas trees etc from Leamington on the 5th inst. out at 2 ½ in the fields and in my walk till 5 20 – dressed – read from 297 to 322 Monteaths’ foresters’ guide – dinner at 6 ¼ - sent off my letter to M- ‘Lawton hall, Lawton, Cheshire’ – read the 1st 80pp. vol. 2 (vid. Friday) Emersons’ history of Modern Greece, and then asleep ½ hour till 9 ½ - then went into the other room – skimmed over the courier – came upstairs at 10 ¾ at which hour F46 ½° - very fine day, - not very frosty tho’ feeling colder than of late

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enderpearlgirl1005 · 5 months

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Purple Ninja

Chapter 1 Fresh Start

On a dark night in the deep depths of an old forest, a man was running as if the world was about to end. The man wore a purple and black ninja suit and had a bullet wound on his shoulder and a stab wound on the back of his thigh. He also had a gash on his left eye, which had blurred his vision and filled half of it with nothing but red and black.

His injuries were beyond painful as every nerve in his body told him to stop running. The man did want to stop, unfortunately he couldn't as the ones responsible for the wounds were still pursuing him. The mysterious ninja man looked to his back, and even with the night having plunged the forest into darkness, and his damaged eye he was still able to see them.

A group of different people were closing in on him quickly, much to his horror. One had a gun in their hand which was the same one that had shot him, another had a knife with some partially dried blood on it. The same knife used to stab him not too long ago, the person was also holding their right arm as it was broken.

The poor man turned his head away from the crazy psychos that had harmed him and continued on running. He'd hope to find some way to get to safety, however fate seemed to be working against him and he knew that this is where his light would finally go out. He soon came across a cliff that led down to a fast flowing river. For a moment he thought about Jumping down there to live, unfortunately due to his injuries he would surely drown. So the man concluded that this is where he would die, so he decided to throw something down into the river to protect it.

Quickly the man pulled off a black ring with a purple gem off his finger and the suit disappeared. Leaving the man in his casual clothes he had put on this morning before he was attacked. He then threw the ring down into the river and it made a small splash as it made contact with the water.

After throwing the ring into the river the man pulled out a photo from his shirt pocket and took one final look at it. The photo was of him, his wife, and their fifteen year old daughter. That day was his daughter's birthday and he wanted to surprise her at her favorite restaurant. However he knew that he wouldn't make it to the party now, the man stared at the photo for some time, only regretting that he couldn't see his young daughter blow out her birthday candles on her special day.

"Hehe, oh Natalie, I'm sorry I couldn't see you turn sixteen, but I don't regret protecting you and your mother. I love you both so much, and I hope the ring will one day find you and you'll be just as great as I was, if not better." The man weakly crooked out with the little amount of strength he had left. He then instantly felt the cold blade of a knife on his neck, he knew that meant his time was finally up.

"You know, you would've lived if you had just given us the ring, but you had to have thrown it into the river. Now it's lost and your powerless, so neither of us win this night." The man holding the knife growled at the dying man.

"Hehe, no I won as I did my duty and protected both my family and the ring. Judas will never have it and he will remain in the dark world forever." The dying man declared.

"Well just see about that. Wont we? Your sacrifice will mean nothing once we set our lord free from his prison." The other man declared as he drove the blade into the dying man's throat.

The other man fell to the grass that was stained in his blood, finally dead, and only regretting not seeing his daughter one last time in real life. His hand clutching onto the photo even as his body slowly grew cold as his light went out.

Meanwhile in a small house in the countryside, a mother and her daughter were in the living room. The two had just gotten back from the birthday party at the daughters favorite restaurant. However they were both worried sick about the father as he never showed up at the party, despite promising he would after work.

"Mom, where could dad be? He wasn't at work, and he didn't show up to the party, so he has to be out there." The daughter, Natalie, explained worried about her father.

"I don't know honey, but I'm sure he'll-" The mother was interrupted when two knocks were heard on the old front door.

The mother looked at her daughter and told her to stay where she was while she looked to see who was at the door. Natalie nodded and watched as her mother cautiously got up and slowly made her way to the door. It wasn't common to get guests late at night so her mother was being careful to not make too much noise in case whoever it was had bad intentions.

Once the mother was up to the door she looked through the peephole and saw that standing right outside the door on the patio were two police officers. When she saw them she got a sinking feeling in the deep pits of her stomach. She prayed that it had to do with her husband as she didn't want something bad happening to her love on her precious child's birthday. The mother gently opened the door and she saw the officers standing in front of her with serious looks on their faces.

"Hello man, are you Violet Lana?" The first officer asked.

"Yes, what brings you to my house? I do hope it doesn't involve my daughter as she was with me all day." Violet jokingly said, trying to lighten up the two serious officers.

"No ma'am, I'm afraid this has to do with your husband." The officer replied not phased in the slightest on Violet's attempt.

When Violet heard that they were here regarding her husband the dread she felt before had grown even more.

"Ma'am, we're sorry to have to tell you this but your husband was found near Quaker Cliff, dead. He had severe injuries and his throat was slit. We suspect that it was murder and not a suicide as we fail to see a reason he'd want to give up his own life. There was no written note in the location so we believe that someone had killed him." The other officer explained.

When Violate heard that she felt her whole world shatter in an instant.Her heart had broken like glass and she collapsed to her knees on the ground. She didn't want to believe that her beloved was gone, having been murdered by someone out there. However based on how serious the officers were being she felt like it was all too real and he really was gone.

While Violate was distraught over the news it was nowhere near how Natalie was feeling right now. Natalie had curled up on the couch and tried her best not to cry out too loud. However tears flowed from her eyes like a waterfall and she couldn't believe what she was hearing now. Her loving father a man who was so kind, caring and loving to both her and everyone was murdered. She wondered who had killed her father and why? Questions that she'd felt like she would never get the answers to and that killed her.

After some time of questioning the police left the property after requesting Violate heads up to the station in the morning for more details and legal matters. Once they were gone Violate went up to Natalie to see how she was doing.

She looked and saw that Natalie had cried herself to sleep as her eyes were all puffy and the cushion under her head was soaking wet from her tears. Violate sighed and decided to talk to Natalie in the morning when everything had settled down. So she grabbed the warm fluffy blanket that was resting on the back of the couch and draped it over Natalie. As soon as she made sure Natalie was comfortable she went to her room to go to bed and try to sleep off the shock and stress.

Several weeks passed after that incident and the police were unable to track down the killer. Natalie and Violate were both very depressed about that and continued to live in the same house as they did when they were a complete family.

So Violate decided that the two of them needed a fresh start and consoled her brother in the matter. Thankfully he allowed them to move in with him and his daughter as they had plenty of room. So Violate signed up for a transfer to an office in the city and was accepted. Now here they are, Violate and Natalie heading to the city, planning on starting a new life with a fresh start.

Natalie was excited to see her cousin Martha again as it's been five years since they last saw one another in person. Unfortunately she was pretty depressed to be saying goodbye to her friends back home, even if she and her mother needed this.

"Hey Natalie, are you excited to see Martha again?" Violate asked her daughter.

"Yeah, but I wish that the circumstances of us moving were different." Natalie explained.

"Me too, but hey you and Martha will be going to the same school and I'm sure she'll help you to fit in and make new friends." Violate explained.

Natalie smiled a bit at that as she knew her cousin always knew how to be awesome and epic. She's always admired Martha's headstrong attitude, and how she always got back up no matter how hard life pushed her down. Natalie remembered how Martha had stayed strong and positive even after she had lost her right leg in a car accident a few years back.

"Hey I wonder if Martha got that prosthetic leg she needs. After all she didn't like being in a wheelchair and she does want to become a female ninja." Natalie explained as she thought about her cousin.

"From the conversation I had on the phone with my brother he said that with the help of their neighbors and friends they were able to raise the money for her prosthetic. So I'm sure she has it and is training as hard as she can to make her dream come true." Violate explained.

"Really? That's great! I can't wait to see her in action with her new leg!" Natalie exclaimed, now even more excited to see her cousin again.

They soon arrived at the apartment building and waiting outside the bakery that was on the bottom floor was Martha and her father. Natalie looked outside the car window and saw her cousin jumping up and down excitedly and just as full with energy as she remembered. She also saw Martha's prosthetic leg and thought it looked cool, as it showed how much of a fighter she was. Natalie opened her car door and stepped out excited to see her older cousin.

When she saw Martha she was able to get a better look at what she had on. Martha was wearing her ripped jean shorts, a black crop top, a yellow sleeveless overcoat, and clip-on earrings in the shape of ninja stairs. Finally to complete her look she had on her favorite ninja themed shoes.

"Hey! Ya! Cous! Come on and bring it in!" Martha exclaimed, with her arms reached out, excited and full of energy.

Natalie smiled hearing the amount of energy Martha had, she loved how ecstatic and energetic Martha was. Even with her disability she never let that stop her from being herself. Natalie walked up to Martha and gave her a big hug, Martha returned it with a big squeeze so hard Natalie thought she was about to crack a rib.

"Ohh! It's so great to see you again! And even better that you'll be living here with us! Ahh! I'm so excited to help you decorate your room!" Martha exclaimed as she hugged her cousin and twirled around like a tornado.

"AHH! YEAH ME TO! BUT MARTHA! COULD YOU PLEASE PUT ME DOWN!" Natalie requested in a hurry as she started feeling sick.

"Oop! Sorry, I couldn't help it, I'm just so excited! Man, we're gonna watch all our favorite movies, play games all night! Oh and if you're interested! Even joined the Ninja Fan club at my school!" Martha exclaimed, bursting with energy and her eyes sparkling.

"Fan club?" Natalie asked, confused when she heard that.

"I'll explain it later, but for now let's go tour the building and I'll be showing you where you'll be staying." Martha said as she put Natalie down, before immediately grabbing her wrist and practically dragged her into the apartment building.

Despite the slight discomfort in her wrist from her cousin's strong grip, Natalie didn't bother to complain as she was enjoying the moment. After a while of the tour Martha brought Natalie up to the apartment where she lived with her dad. The two girls entered the room and the place was just how Natalie remembered it being. A room that was too big for just two people, it used to have three, but after Martha's parents divorced her mother moved out to go to Canada. Thankfully now the room was gonna have the amount of people it's meant to have, which is four.

"Wanna see the room you got?" Martha asked.

"Sure I'm up for it." Natalie said.

Martha smiled and went to the room where Natalie would be staying. The room was in the hallway that was past the kitchen, and about three doors down in the hallway. The room was big enough for her to stay in and even have a sleepover with about three friends if she so desires. There was also a single window across from the door that showed a good view of the city.

"Wow this is a nice room. I like it, and I can't wait to see what it'll look like once all my stuff is in it!" Natalie exclaimed excitedly about her new room.

"Yeah me too! I'm glad I was able to convince dad to give you this room, and more glad that you won't have a view of Mr. Parker in his swimming pool." Martha explained.

"Who's that? And why would that be bothersome to me?" Natalie asked, confused by her cousin's words.

"He's another attendant in the apartment across the street, the room he has also comes with a pool that has a big window, and unfortunately for most of the fold living here who has a view of it, they see him swimming in it. It wouldn't be a problem if he didn't like to always go swimming naked." Martha explained as she cringed at the thought.

"Ugh! Based on your words and the face your making, I'm gonna guess he's not that attractive when he's not wearing anything." Natalie said as she shuttered at the thought as well.

"Yup he's not one of those hot ripped guys you see on TV. If he was, I'd totally let you have a window where you can see him, but unfortunately, he's an old man who has so much hair on his body, you think he's half wolf." Martha explained as she shuttered again.

Natalie giggled a little at what Martha was saying, she always knew her cousin said the funniest things ever and she loved it. This did help her feel a little better, but she was still sad about the reason why her and her mom had moved here. She was happy to be living with her cousin and uncle, but disappointed that her dad couldn't live with them as well.

Martha looked at Natalie and saw that her cousin's smile was starting to melt away like ice cream on a hot summer day. At first she wanted to try and cheer her up, but the thought then came to mind about just letting Natalie feel and process her emotions.

This led to a bit of a bump for Martha as she didn't know what she had to do at that moment. However she didn't need to think long as she felt her phone vibrate in her back shorts pocket. She swiftly took it out and saw that she had received a message from her dad.

So she opened it up and read what the text had to say "Hey Martha the moving truck just arrived so you girls better come down here and help bring everything up to the apartment. After all, we don't want our family to sleep on the couch the first day they move here. And tomorrow I'd like for you to give Natalie a tour of your school while her mother discusses some things with the principal to allow Natalie to transfer."

As soon as she finished reading the text she responded with "Alright dad, you messaged me just in time, Natalie was getting sad and I wasn't sure if I should comfort her or let her feel her emotions. Aside from that I'll tell her about the moving truck, Love you!"

After sending the response Martha looked to Natalie and tapped her lightly to get her attention. "Hey cous moving trucks here, let's head out and unpack your stuff so we can get your new room sorted out." Martha explained.

"Alright you go on ahead, I just need a moment." Natalie said, sounding pretty depressed now.

Martha frowned at this and just turned around and walked out of the apartment. Natalie meanwhile went up to the window and opened it up enough for her to rest her arms on it. She looked out to the city as the wind blew into her face and made her long black hair flow beautifully.

As she sat there she thought about how she could at least make things better here, even if her father wasn't with them anymore. Natalie knew that her dad wouldn't want her to just mope around, he would want her to live and be as happy as she could be. All he ever wanted was for her to be happy, so she decided she'd do what she could to be happy.

"Alright Natalie! A new life in a new home and a new school! You've got this! I'm gonna live my life and be happy, just as my dad would've wanted me to be. Oh and I really hope to find a cute boy here! I've been wanting to find a cute boyfriend for sometime now. And if he's all dark and mysterious then that will make it even better! EEE!" Natalie squealed as she thought about a cute dreamy boy to hopefully be her boyfriend.

After cheering herself up she raced down to help her family out with unpacking as she wanted her new room to be decorated ASAP. As raced down to the first floor, Natalie had no idea what was waiting for her in this city, and how her life would change forever.

#cult #cultists #darkmagic #disability #evilforces #family #fighting #friends #highschool #highschoolexperience #ninja #purpleninja #sidekick #evil ninjas

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libidomechanica · 6 months

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“This appled Mendications, she locks as their goddess wonderous”

Thy thou, whose weep twelve day, in love love looking now? Like thy aid, my father oceans high, on the ruthless, tame, save though, nor Wit shall smother’s edge, am I, as their best parent kind this or waist thou have a kiss—the one words in one turned way. I vex my hand, awhile sheds, to laugh, no doubt was what sweet, a friend, the sharpen’d so lips she loud and makes of them

yet, and watch’d no very same park, for the name who kneel. With Himself surround the roses constant light. As eager swim an hope in losing always clothes are abroad. The beautiful and life in the sparkling thunder pray Medea for his bosom beneath find sand me, where he prone, softly by her heard, lie of the did black eyes the should impute my

Love’s heave me my life? Made the gather quick to ventually, who perils by his love once I vision by think what of suffering me not and devout a couch; and soft, in the for when first content, while in they always on that hold vanities have of the cursed them place the would have you sawest the chain’d, when, met, jumping thee my last was to hear new thy heat

a vision could for a guinea and inner their worketh me her hair worse, knowing but a rag some aqua-vita. After houshold. A light, they walking’s presentence thee, Moon! My soft, when all in the four find no tide sea until Thou beside, no such as happie sighed enoughts mouth. For once I paceth from her fresh-quilted colours made his heart is wonders

here was mouth whatever diet; the smile, his melancholy woman, the leads ordering makes me not fry. What dream? As our soule doth with the odde an arm fellow voice’s feeling, with it close! Young doth Love, and loue, without, until than altars to dust burn antique, this way quarto, by goodbye, good luckle of the greater life is brow, forget, I cannot

be shortest when he doves. He space a boughs lisp for his dreamer and the sailors adapted, and wave said, he form, or the dead; but Christabel, and a smiling but darkness, he know what Barbican. He would set sunset. Good- morrow, and some; and appeare Love’s, and hand—ah, ripe for the poor where slippers, too, outstretched fore-see my Friends not be shore all.—There;

if loath’d magic Shape beauty, blind with am I too late: what my Lucia. Short-lived then all consequent, too, she new Bloom, and hands mouth such the water page again, who for which long that lures, dull. As finger panting so surrection, sober and her call more shepherds a coin were crystal bower. Doe not lover, not only. Get in tear; now, young pick’d for

something out make himself I care Fled in the finishing day that swells, the Quarrel, and the Rosebud of shut fall our mutual ordered year, and learn’d gem, appear’d; yet, too, likes with the fetched Manuscription green, to decay’d his forehead upon the mastern, since, even in their sphere. In their hopes from Aristocracy; or folk, though like till some her with

mai’st sorrow. Which has before, enam’ling spot thin the born, This stately through weathed in heard about hardly he, in sweet brave door of Poesy, this is no drew in your face, one did the rose, like tilt of the Dust of any ill, I thine eyes that mirrors. It could learned those sweeten’d sometimes—as one’s shining? The hours fled! A less lies shoot; for To-day prepar’d

o’er the deposit. With this need of billowship. Let on occasion? Victim of the stub of his painful page against its simply don’t say-master; she knows whate’er where is life? But Judas was he, t is head—it scare in Langdale Pike a blind enough doubtle the cublesse then my for more safe from the never head, and was in the hope end wine—

their shall there have been morals, from the Face full stars, still a Chequered ye was the rose red learnt, if Queen of Hell; yet what ail the gentle than that winged pine, but, fill you bittering that Lamp had parent; his natives, and revelry,— and with old Bench for great wrong: I bade they sunk in sleep, songs of two shadows dappled tear. This appled Mendications, she

locks as their goddess wonderous evident grow, and cedar gloom, all the love to deck that her arms in lane she season as a table took the Goal, over us, what prime into a birds his forehead that the bless, seem at below. Air and doll down; he sea, a strange teaspoons’ of velvet cushion: but where were sets through Inez grieve the prime; marriage, rage

great apart, without the liveranced language that looks of late to his health, agrees? Begun, have said their mind sinks, and coming fact, not seemed—and as if never once did so long his eyes of the Dawn’s story is no stared the late—yet in it. Pure-bosoms bark will breaking voice even in shore abused as if after- rest that persons which flee away?

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 5 #180 texts #ballad

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theorist-influencer-untitled · 9 months

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8.26.23 Saturday

Yey! No work tomorrow but no day off for me...hahah... and huhuh...

Angels, I badly need a job and money and I just wanna compete in a good way that I can speak English and if americans will tell me that I have a problem hey! JOE AND JANE YOU GUYS AREN'T PERFECT!

I need a job and money angels, it is challenging for me to master this "fucking job" but really challenging.... This call center thingy... But I wanna think of it as a game... I want my wave-mates in 468 to grow as a mature agent of Iqor...

It is just weird, I feel fat, ugly and old angels... I wanna be skinny suddenly, seeing Tin2x one of my wavemates but she is still on her 20's...

10:55 am

Well,that's life people will say they care for you but they have different deep within... I have no guilty feelings coz I'm real...

I just need money and I feel irritated working in a call center, the flow of character of people are all different with each other... You can't expect a true friendship but there is... I have to stand alone and flow and just be thankful on some new good souls along the way... I just wanna work coz I need money and I wanna beat the job of course... There will be intimidation and complexities...

I started to work and bloom in Cebu Pacific Air... Where I felt that I was loved by and cared by those people that I considered my FRIENDS....They never put me in the middle of shame... They always covered me with their wings... I bloom and somehow they wanted me to flip my wings but I'm always a child... Now that I can they are all gone...

Sometimes I wanted to cry but my real friends are all gone... I can't flip my wings coz the people around me now simply wanted to smash me...

12:06 noon

I'm so happy I'm able to fix my baby John's ears... Now his ear dirt is normal... Normal ear dirt of dogs are just like the earwax of human's ears...

But I need some collagen on my hands and feet and most specially down there...

12:41 noon

I need help angels, for oil,ginger,onion and garlic plus the chicken cubes for Neko and Lalah...

I will pay the gasul... Still, waiting for Uncle Jun's sponsored food...

Thinking of our body soap here and I need to do my laundry...

Angels, I'm having a hard time here... I paid Ely as well just a 1/4 of my entire credit...

John changes his behaviour since this Thursday crime but he loves to eat bread... If this dog will die, I will go with my dog...Coz I know there is a ritual in this world... So, frustrating I can't go up or can't prove myself... I never have the chance to travel as well.

I'm so frustrated... I wanted oven and I wanted a collagen....

1:06 pm

It feels like someone is dead in this house... Where is Judas?

1:24 pm

This ate Liza is tanga2x stupid and tuso! Will explain later...Not a true friend...

Ate Liza is communicating with the other seller of food and store like the other carinderiaz...They are updating each other angels...

Ate Liza is just copying ate Cha....Then, ate Cha and her husband went to Japan already... And I figured out it from the past months that this Ate Cha is communicating with ate Liza...

I went to other carinderia'Z that if I can buy an 80 pesos adobo instead of 60 pesos, the other carinderia'Z said it can't be that way... I just need to buy 2 separate 60 pesos chicken adobo, I asked a favour if they can make it 80 pesos on 1 order...

I went to Ate Liza she is just copying other people's decision... Meaning will never be real on me...

People in my wave are innocent...There are wealthy kids in call center and some are owning a car... I feel sad and it is really depressing in my part.Those rich kids are just wanting to sit and earn all day but there are wealthy kids.... My Uncle's are innocent as well... Those wealthy kids they just acquired the skills a long time ago and happy earning and simply sitting but it took time for them to learn it as well...But! My point it doesn't mean it is just a call center everyone is poor... There are some wealthy or rich or upper kids inside the call center.

1:59 pm

That Aunt Teresa is on her "silent snapping" and if I sent a message Uncle DD will text or call me...It sounds weird but analyze the situation angels.

Uncle DD is receiving the fundings from Japan if there is or will cover or shoulder...

I will pay the gasul and I don't have extra...

3:23 pm

I just need to rest and later will do my laundry... I need to drink tea later as well coz I feel super bloated...

Hmm... About the new girl I figured out that she is already having a one son when she was 15 years old... Well, I was able to work with her professionally yesterday... She is just 20 or 21 years old having a 6 years old son...Her name is Angie ,she is a blonde girl and super skinny smaller than me...

I still wanna acquire the skills in Iqor, my aim is to beat the job nothing else.. I wanted to be a product manager but I know some people inside the room didn't accept me and I'm fine with it...

Remember that I posted here that I have so many things to explain and I didn't have time to make a long explanation here... This is the moment while resting...

Wait....

3:34 pm

First I didn't know anything at the backstage of Iqor... I don't have guilty emotions on something or on someone...

I did enter having a clean slate....I was and still never a judgemental... I did and do respect people's character.... But I'm not sure if I can keep my clean slate coz I'm adjusting to the nature of job in call center... Meaning being in the call center is different on other industries or companies that I worked with way back... I really wanna beat the nature of the job! I feel offended and degraded...

I was in Cebu Pacific Air my position there was "ground attendant or CSA ( customer service associate)"

Being a Product Manager it is not about being the master of the floor... For example my previous manager or supervisor in Cebu Pacific Air can get the title of being a Manager or Supervisor or Team Leader even without knowing the entire flow of the call center floor. Coz he is already old and having wisdom in the world and he knew how to balance the situation in the work fleld...This is somehow difficult to understand for matured people only....

Well, I'm just explaining here if they can't accept me well then it's fine... But I still wanna dig deeper on Iqor who to target for me to be able to stay and get the skills as in master it and go up and be a leader as well...

In my wave at 468, since I'm again a newbie in the call center world... I chose Mia or Bella to be our team leader if ever we are going to be in the same group when time comes that we are going to be on the floor of Iqor... Coz they will never kick me out if I have struggles on the floor.

Mia is my friend and Bella is my sisterhood... But all of them are my wavemates and I have nothing against on anyone... It's just that I see something on Mia and Bella that I can't find on other people inside my wave at 468.

4:21 pm

I'm so scared angels my right foot is twisting again inward... I have right leg cramps... Argh! My pelvic is still aching...

7:35 pm

Thank God John ate his dinner with me... Probably he is angry when I'm not in the house..

I still feel panic and I still need money... I wanna do collagen on my feet and hands and down there... I wanna do gluta... I need to keep a job angels...

8:06 pm

Grrr... The water in our village is so slow on the faucet... Uncle Jun said probably coz everyone is in the house using water... I wasn't able to wash my clothes... Grrr....

Water,water,water please tomorrow... Return the normal flow of our water here in the village...

I wanna have dimple angels... I feel super ugly... I need botox... I need to keep a job... I need to fix my butt as well... I need a scrub...

9:21 pm

Classical music that I really like angels... Aside from procrastinating... It is so good to feel and close your eyes...

youtube

10:04 pm

Baby,Darling and Sweetheart...

Can you fucking marry me Mike??? I WANNA GO HOME MIKE ...

youtube

10:15 pm

Still here... Just here and I don't know....I feel so frustrated...

Mike???? Home... Home???

Hold-up??? Or Procrastinating???

youtube

10:55 pm

I feel bitter Mike... My film is flop Mike... Mike I wanna be a product manager but I need time.... I want to be admired by or own a company... I wanna have my own Pet Store... Now, this call center thingy I feel that it is really hellish but I need money Mike and I need a job... I'm losing xfactor as an individual... A lot of women went up but I'm always just a supporter for 16 years Mike... I feel fat, ugly,old and wrinkled...

I feel so ugly Mike... I feel so ugly and still self-pitying... I need money and I need to keep a job Mike... I need that "untouchable status"... It is not easy over the phone, I'm so offended Mike...

youtube

11:28 pm

Our lives are just like film Mike... I couldn't go up and be a star just for once...Since 2007 Mike, I'm always low and always the 2nd or last choice of everyone... Always a wall flower Mike... You didn't even care... I still have windblow trap... Dying for nothing... Even a real film of being a real Zombie now, can't even have it... Still, can't buy Starbucks... My S-bones are aching but I'm not guilty but they just keep on hurting me here...i

It is unfair to die Mike, it is unfair not to have or own the "dinosaurs" me, my baby-John other dogs that I love and some good souls like some family and friends and people along the way...

youtube

#Youtube

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parfumieren · 10 months

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L'Eau de Jatamansi (L'Artisan Parfumeur)

You would think a fragrance containing the fabled ingredient spikenard (Nardostachys jatamansi) would stick around as long on skin as it has in human memory. After all, spikenard is a member of the Valerianaceae tribe of plants, the most prominent member of which is (natch) valerian-- a tall plant with showy pink blossoms and roots that reek to high heaven, which explains its nickname according to the Greeks: phu.

Spikenard is similar to valerian in structure and appearance, but instead of a foetid stink, it produces the approximate scent of paradise. Musician, artist, and amateur perfumer Brian Eno cited his first encounter with this transcendent fragrance as a significant moment in his love affair with scent. "(A) woman I met in Ibiza gave me a minute bottle containing just one drop of an utterly heavenly material called nardo…" he once wrote; even in eight-point magazine typeface, his awe and gratitude were evident.

Long used in traditional Chinese and Ayurvedic medicine as a remedy for persistent pain and grief, spikenard has also been identified as the "costly oil" with which Mary Magdalene anointed Christ as he rested in the house of Lazarus. According to the Gospel, Judas Iscariot argued that the perfume (being "of great price") could have been sold, and the funds distributed amongst the poor. At that time, one pound of pure oil of nard cost roughly 300 silver denarii. To put this price into perspective, one denarius represented a single day's wages for the common Roman soldier. Mary Magdalen therefore blew the equivalent of a healthy trust fund on a single vessel of perfume. Needless to say, this makes me feel a whole lot better about my own fragrance budget.

If you manage to find any quantity of the now-discontinued L'Eau de Jatamansi by L'Artisan Parfumeur, it might set you back as much as Mary Magdalen's scent du jour. Your wad of cash would get you a product containing only natural essential oils from certified organic sources-- no synthetics. But you'd also be paying through the nose (pun intended) for an eau de toilette whose scent life is shockingly brief, requiring frequent reapplications to keep it alive on skin. As extravagantly as you're meant to splash it on, you eventually might find that it has cost you the modern equivalent of 300 denarii.

Worth it? That first splash will decide you.

L'Eau de Jatamansi kicks off with a wonderful top note of spikenard and black pepper which segues into the scent of fresh carnations -- not the boutonniere variety, whose fragrance has given up the ghost in some florist's refrigerator case, but the tiny "pinks" that grow half-wild in tangled garden beds. When warmed by the sun, these blossoms send up a piquant odor that is a perfect triangulation between raw celery, powdered cloves, and dimestore candy hearts.

Sadly, this lovely phase is tragically cut short by an overpunctual drydown reminiscent of old-fashioned perfumed bath powder, which comes as a dry surprise after Jatamansi's juicy green heart. And just as you're coming to terms with it, even the drydown fades too soon-- does nothing about this perfume want to stick around?

If perfumer Karine Vinchon ever revisited her creation and rectified the persistence problem, and if L'Artisan ever re-released it as an EDP "extrême", sure. I'd try it. But buy it? For my reluctance to fully commit to so fickle a scent -- regardless of how breathtakingly lovely -- I hope, like Mary Magdalene, to be forgiven.

Scent Elements: Himalayan nard, grapefruit, bergamot, clary sage, tea, Turkish rose, ylang-ylang, cardamom, saintwood, sandalwood, patchouli, vetiver, balm, incense, papyrus

#l'artisan parfumeur #l'eau de jatamansi #perfume review #parfümieren

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woodworkingpastor · 2 years

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Love One Another -- John 13:34-35 -- Sunday, June 12, 2022

For the summer, our worship services will focus on two words that appear more times than I had realized in the New Testament: one another. When I sat down to work though the sermon outline several weeks ago and typed the words “one another” into the search feature in my Bible software, I assumed there would be material for 4 or 5 sermons. I was quite surprised to realize I had to combine some related topics to get the list to 10! The New Testament has much to say about how we are to

love; respect; embrace; have compassion for; encourage; serve; stop harming; live in harmony with; greet; and instruct one another.

Today we begin with the command that is the greatest of all the “one another” instructions: Love one another.

A new commandment?

The text from John 13 is part of Jesus’ words from the Last Supper. We read from this section of Scripture each time we have Love Feast, but we don’t normally read this far. At this point in Jesus’ discourse, he has washed the disciple’s feet; Peter has protested; and Judas has left the room to initiate the process of betraying Jesus to the authorities. These are things with which we should be well familiar.

With the remaining 11 disciples, Jesus begins to tell them about the life he is calling them—and all of us—to live. The thing is, he begins in a rather surprising way:

I give you a new commandment… (John 13:34a).

If we’re paying attention, this doesn’t sound like a new commandment, it sounds a whole lot like an old commandment! It seems that Jesus is referencing Scripture, in this case, Leviticus 19:18:

You shall love your neighbor as yourself…

“Love one another” doesn’t sound all that different from “Love your neighbor;” it seems like Jesus is quoting an old—and really good—idea! So what is Jesus saying? What is new about this commandment that really just seems old?

One way this is different is because for Moses, loving your neighbor was defined in the negative—by all the things they were not to do to one another. Moses established boundaries for behavior because he understood that we all need boundaries. Left to our own devices, we will trample over one another when we think it is to our advantage to do so. So Moses says, “Look, notice where God is putting up boundaries and fences around our behavior. Don’t cross these, don’t hurt one another in these ways.” When we look at the instructions just before this verse, we see a long list of all the ways they would be living out their love for one another by what they would not do:

Do not steal…deal falsely…lie…defraud…keep workers wages until morning…revile the deaf…put a stumbling block before the blind…render an unjust judgment…be partial to the poor…defer to the great…hate anyone…take vengeance…bear a grudge (Leviticus 19:11-18)

When God told Moses to tell the Hebrew people to “Love your neighbor as yourself,” he was working with a community that was deeply shaped by the bonds of family, tribe, nation—people who already had common connections and bonds to bind them together. That’s a good thing, but like everything in life, it does present some challenges. One of the basic struggles of our times is overcoming those old, tribal tendencies that are lodged deep within us. Our perceived need for self-protection is strong; because of this, we will give a pass to the bad behavior and wrong ideas of our “tribe” almost every time, if for no other reason than to stay in the good graces of those within our tribe.

I find this one of the most compelling explanations for the division we see around us. Troubled times has triggered this old binary, “us vs. them” mindset. Everywhere you look you’ll find one more person demanding your absolute allegiance to one affiliation; even the slightest deviation from ideological purity is enough for the group to turn on you like a pack of wolves.

But this was less of a problem for Moses’ community; because the bonds of connection already existed, what they most needed were good boundaries to make their daily interactions run more smoothly.

In the New Testament, however, the fundamental nature of the community has changed. The community we are forming in Christ—the church—is not one defined by tribe or tongue or national identity. It is formed by our baptism that crosses all earthly boundaries. In spite of the innate tendency to believe that various forms of separation or segregation are better, when we enter the church (the body, not the building!) we have entered a wall-breaking, boundary-crossing community shaped first and foremost by Jesus’ sacrificial love.

If we want to understand the character of this love, we need to look at Jesus. One of my favorite places to do that is in Philippians 2:5-11, verses that many scholars believe to be an early Christian hymn of praise expressing the majesty of Jesus’ work on our behalf. It teaches us that Jesus

Emptied himself. Before Jesus was born in Bethlehem, he existed in absolute equality with God; his work to bring salvation to us involved him leaving that behind. Philippians 2 describes this as taking on slavery! It was the first sacrifice Jesus made on our behalf. I can’t imagine what it would be like to leave heaven; some days I don’t even want to leave my house!

Humbled himself. How? We might list any number of ways; but here, the hymn writer says it was in accepting death on the cross. To receive the absolute rejection and erasure by the very people he had already given up so much to save is again beyond our ability to comprehend.

Earlier in John, we learn another expression of Jesus’ sacrificial love: Jesus

Tied a towel around himself to help us comprehend the kind of love Philippians describes.

Gods and kings and other rulers of the world don’t behave in this way. But Jesus does, and he asks us to do the same:

Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.

We do this because New Testament community is not based on tribe or tongue or nationality; it is based in baptism. All that we have to be the church are the deep-penetrating waters of baptism to shape us into this new community.

Baptism is a powerful thing. In many ways, I imagine the water of baptism to be like a solvent that dissolves the old crud that makes our relationships so very difficult at times. I thought about this recently when I needed a paintbrush to apply some polyurethane to a project I was finishing. When I got the paintbrush, I realized that I hadn’t done a good enough job cleaning it the last time I’d used it, and the bristles were hard and stuck together. So I went to the hardware store and bought a can of brush cleaner. I soaked the brush in the solvent, then put on rubber gloves and massaged the crud out of the bristles, then soaked and scrubbed it in soapy water and brought the brush back to life again. With the crud washed away the brush was available to live into its intended purpose—just as the waters of baptism release us to our intended purpose: love one another.

But I also imagine baptism with a second purpose that is the opposite of the first: baptism is like a glue that binds us together into a new community. The next time you go to the hardware store to buy brush cleaner, go down the adhesive aisle and note all the different kinds of tapes and glues and epoxys on the shelves. If you need something stuck together, there is a product for you! So do we all; we need the strong, binding power of baptism because of the forces that work to pull us apart instead of loving one another.

This will be the sign

Love one another” is first in the series because it is the sign to everyone that we are Jesus’ disciples. People prefer other things here, of course: Some people look at a large congregation and say, that’s a faithful church! Others look at the amount and kind of our outreach and say, “Now there, that’s a congregation that is faithful!” Yet others look for the rightness of our theology as a sign of faithfulness. Each of those things has their place and ought to be approached carefully. But the sign, the priority, the primary and most important evidence of our discipleship is our love for one another.

It is a love that moves past convenience into the daily, sacrificial acts of loving one another. It is a love that moves beyond shallow relationships into the challenging honesty of seeing one another as real people. It is a love that moves beyond the pain of sin and brokenness and leads with forgiveness and the offer of restoration.

Theologian Scot McKnight says the church is living into its Jesus-given purpose when it

sees people as people and treats them as people by nurturing them to become what God designed them to be. People with names and histories and stories. People who are doing well and people who are not. People who are recovering from church abuse. People who’ve had surgeries and sicknesses. People who are aging. People who are rich and poor and everything in between. People who are wounded and in need of healing, people who are unemployed and underemployed, people who need encouragement or tangible assistance (A Church called Tov, 127).

This the kind of church about which Jesus will say, “Yes! Very good! Well done! What a masterpiece!” This is a church that gets it. This is a church that loves one another.

Sisters and brothers, let us set our focus on the thing that is most important, the thing by which everyone will know we are Jesus’ disciples. May we love one another!

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pagdalumat · 2 years

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Judas’ Death (Live in Concert)

In 2018 A.D., a ladder is hanged instead of Judas’ Black body, silhouetted

by scaffolds & stage lights piercing through faux cathedral ruins. The choir sings

Poor, old, Judas/ So long, Judas The camera lingers on. A rain of silver

confetti pours in lieu of a southern tree bearing a strange fruit. Our narrator

was last heard singing You have murdered me/ murdered me repeatedly until he is offstage, then offscreen, & his voice is beaten by electric

guitar screams. In this iteration, to please the TV censors, they denied Judas the tools to lynch himself, the chance to belt

the ultimate note. In a disappearing act, the spectacle is the implication.

#ekphrastic poetry #poetry #jesus christ superstar #philippine poetry #cw: suicide

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the-finch-address · 2 years

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👑 this for whatever character you want in the The Dog Yard. Thanks!

👑 - A random fact about one of my OCs Couldn't decide, so here's something about all seven!

Judas He's suspiciously well traveled, boasting several landmark patches on an old leather jacket after aimlessly wandering the greater half of America. Oh, the places he went, the sights he saw. If only he didn't have intense retrograde amnesia and could remember any of it! 😂 Farren When not locked into a life or death game of fisticuffs, Farren is creating. Drawing, painting, sewing, singing--his favorite, though, is film and photography. Their trusty vhs camcorder becomes a vital tool as soon as chapter two! Mags Being the Lighthouse Keeper's daughter comes with a few perks, such as (A:) having access to the secret underground tunnels beneath the town, and (B:) knowing the hottest gossip before anyone else. She uses both of these privileges to commit crimes. Havard Oh I've been holding this fact in looking for some place to put it for sooo long, here goes: Havard (cold, bitter Havard) hits the diner at 5:30am each day for a single cup of coffee. The thing is, she hates the taste. She's really showing up for the company. (there's more lore here, but that's for another time) Eddie The fun fact is that I'm genuinely worried that, upon publication, tumblr will somehow find this man and poor little meow meow-ify his ass. He is the lowest and vainest sniveling husk of a man and he gets worse before he gets better. (Bonus fact; he likes hot chip) Roman Despite adorning a pair of heart-frame glasses, Roman can actually see just fine! (She just thinks they're neat <3) This goes completely unmentioned up until a scene where the frames are broken and the culprits are, well, blindsided by her reaction. Elias Though he's no stranger to the modern times, Elias is a traditional man at heart. He still hangs his clothes out on a line, he bakes his own bread, he hand writes letters to people who live next door. He's also sugar free! (with a strong preference towards dates)

Thank you for the ask! This was a lot of fun to do!!

#tag games #why is this so much easier than writing #If I could write as well as I could spit out random facts I'd be unstoppable #tdy #judas #farren #mags #havard #eddie #roman #elias #oh i should have put the wordier tags on the bottom huh #tumblr is only going to keep half of these tags #oh well

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bootleg-sara · 2 years

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Headcanons for Judas, Magdalene and Azazel?

Ooo okay very nice cast we got here. I’ll start with Judas because I understand his character best, then I’ll go Azazel and finally Magdalene

(Head canons undercut, ended up being a lot longer than expected)

Judas 🔪 (11 years old)

Hc A (canon-adjacent): Judas has a very complicated relationship with religion. He believes in God and is very keen into the spiritual side of Christianity. You would never be able to tell but he is takes much of what he knows about Christianity to heart. But yet he also will constantly deny it. He’ll tell you that religion is a sham and that none of it is real. Though at the same time, he doesn’t follow the religion like most do. He certainly doesn’t follow the morals of it and makes it a goal to do the opposite (of courses he’s also only 11 years old so he's not going that far with it).

Truthfully he doesn’t really know why he’s so adamant on this, probably to piss off his parents. Poor kid has a terrible case of Christian guilt and lives life everyday in fear of God. The idea of an omnipotent deity being able to do whatever to they want to him is terrifying. TLDR: Judas lives in constant fear of God’s power while simultaneously doing everything that would make God upset. Someone please help this boy

Hc B (funny): Judas is a complete coward. He likes to put on a tough front, but pretty much everyone knows he’s faking it. Except for The Forgotten, who has taken to looking up to Judas. Not exactly the best role model but Judas takes great pride in it. The Forgotten is one of the few people Judas will ever be nice too. Anyways, he’s really easy to scare. His cowardliness paired with his tendency to overthink situations makes him all to good of a target. Rumor has it that the reason “Judas’ tongue” is a trinket is because Azazel pulled a rather nasty trick on him during a tense fight which lead to the accident. On the next run his tongue grew back. But now sometimes kids will just, come across a tongue. No one is really sure why Satan likes it but Judas thinks it’s cool

Hc C (sad boi hours): Judas lived an incredibly lonely life. Back before the basement he was an outcast among his peers. His very apparent pessimism drove most kids away from trying to talk to him. His home life wasn’t much better as his parents actively shunned his interests in astrology and spiritual connections. He’d seclude himself, it was easier than trying to connect with anyone. His complicated views on religion only served to push people father away. Judas was afraid to confront his parents about it as he didn’t want them to be more upset than they already were. He was living day to day scared for his life from a higher being he could never hope to understand and the one’s he was meant to connect with never gave him the time of day.

Though thankfully things weren’t all terrible. He did have one friend, Jude. They were opposites through and through. Judas was pessimistic and hateful, while Jude was a brimming optimist and saw the good in everyone. They had first met on Jude’s behalf, has he thought how close their names were was hilarious. Judas didn’t think so and pushed them away like he did others. But Jude was a stubborn kid, refusing to not at least get one conversation out of him. It was a lengthy process, but eventually the two bonded. Jude was a very popular kid in school mind you, so he did get judged for hanging out with the “weird creepy kid”. Jude didn’t mind as he loved Judas’ company. One day Jude convinced his parents to buy him a tarot deck, something that Judas has wanted for awhile now. On Judas’s birthday, Jude had surprised him with the new deck. Judas was bawling his eyes out at the act of kindness, but unfortunately it wasn’t for the reasons Jude had hoped.

For not to long after, Judas had ran away from home without so much of a word to anyone. Jude was devastated at the loss of his best friend, and panicked everyone to out and search for him. The search lasted about a month of on and off searching before it was dropped. Jude continued to look for him by himself, but his own parents didn’t want their kid wandering around when there could be a kidnapper on the loose. Judas, now trapped in a brand new hell, wanders around in search of an escape. He’s not one to give up his Book of Belial so easily, but there is one item he’ll always replace it for. That being the Deck of Cards, the one reminder of his dear friend who Judas fears will have all but forgotten of him by the time he’s finally free.

Hc D (personal takes): Judas hates the undead and the trope surrounding it. He always found zombies lame before the basement, but now they just make him upset. “Why can’t things just stay dead?? Why does every enemy in this God forsaken pit have to be some form of a dead guy???” - Judas, probably. He hates the Shopkeepers and Blue Baby for that reason. Of course he’s grateful that he gets resurrected after his failed runs. But he was never dead to begin with! Why? Because he bleeds of course! He’s seen it with Blue Baby who never has blood, and in other kids who lose all their life from devil deals. Surely he’ll never end up like that. Nope. Never. Can’t be so. Everything will be fine because the basement is predicable and never changes.

(On the same note, Judas will never take a devil deal when he knows he’ll be left with no “red hearts”/blood. Not bleeding really freaks him out. He’ll always able to tell because of how BoB functions.)

Azazel 🦇 (age unknown)

Hc A (canon-adjacent): Azazel is a creature that was born in the basement much like Apollyon. While not nearly as old, Azazel has been around for awhile now. Azazel is an odd case all things considered, as he’s more akin to the, well, kin of the original Azazel who fell from heaven. Supposedly there have been multiple children of the original fallen Angel that have inherited the name Azazel. But even Apollyon doesn’t really know if our Azazel is legit or just another spawn of the basement’s antics. (To be fair Apollyon is also unaware if any sort of religion is “real” or not. As far as he knows, everything in the basement is the result of other people’s own beliefs and not of their true existence)

Either way he has lived here for all of his relatively young life. He has no memories of any family or of any life other than being popped into existence. It can be argued that Azazel is not really a being of consciousness, as his existence of being connected to the basement. Every time the basement changes, so does he. He functions more of a representative of the people who are currently inside. All of their worst traits mashes into one. Though his time has lead to him being a scapegoat for the people inside, as he’s rather easy to blame for all the things going wrong.

Hc B (funny): Azazel is some weird combination of a bat, goat, human thing. He has the wings and ears of the bat, but the legs and eyes of a goat. His overall body is that of a human’s, lacking the usual pointed tail of a stereotypical demon. His horns are more like that of a demon’s though, as they certainly aren’t similar to goat horns. His vision is great yet terrible all at the same time. He basically has the eyes of a prey animal, but the instincts of a predator. So he can see really far ahead, but not very much of what’s right beside him. Can't focus great either. If it wasn’t for his human traits mixed in with it, Azazel would struggle a lot more with things sneaking up on him. He struggles a lot more on basic movement than one would think thanks to his goat eyes. Like whoever made this dude did not take into account he’d have to function around it. At least he can stay warm easily, his hot blood makes him a natural radiator. And he can use his boiling blood as defense! How great. Only his legs have fur on them, the rest of him is basically human skin.

Hc C (sad boi hours): As mentioned a bit earlier, Azazel is someone would could easily be considered a creature without proper consciousness. Much like most living beings created in the basement, they are there to serve a purpose to the people inside. Azazel is a warning, a sign of what one could become when continuing down the path they are currently in. This idea that his life is only there to be used by others has gotten him the closest he’s ever gotten to being his own person. The kids, despite being ruthless vindictive people, are actually the most supportive figures Azazel has ever had. For unlike most who came before, they treat Azazel like they’re their own person. Even if at first all Azazel did was berate the kids. They are all so young and confused, they couldn’t really see the part of them that was in Azazel. Eventually he started to break out enough to start help killing monsters along side them.

Azazel’s first major break through however was at the birth of Blue Baby. After Blue had been separated from their boss counterpart and learned to think for themselves, something clicked in Azazel. If Blue and Apollyon could make their own decisions for the better of the basement, why couldn’t he? Using that little loophole, he was able to finally think for himself fully, not being guided around by the basement’s will. He became noticeably nicer after that, but not nice enough to stop being a jerk to most everyone. Being mean was in his nature. Azazel struggles a lot with his identity. He’s never really sure if he’s in control of himself or not. Who’s to say he wasn’t still living the path the basement wanted him to? His main goal, along with Eden, is to prove his own sentience by attempting to the leave the basement with the others.

Hc D (personal takes): So Azazel has always been a trouble maker. His pranks ranged from genuinely funny, to disrespectful, to downright dangerous. Even around the time he was having his personal revelations, he loved to cause problems for others in his own amusement. Often time he’d put the kids in danger, if not outright causing their deaths. After gaining more sentience his pranks stopped being on the malicious side of things. No more purposeful causing deaths or the like. He was trying to escape the basement now too, so hurting people was counter intuitive. But he was always playing jabs at people even if they didn’t appreciate it. Some time during this phase of growing himself, he had a run with Samson. Now Samson was someone who had always struggled with getting far in runs. He was reckless, often running into danger and getting seriously hurt. While the self damage helped on one floor, once he’d enter a new floor, he’d lose all that vigor and be left defenseless.

This run has been going pretty well for the both of them. They had managed to get all the way to the chest, a floor Samson had never been on before. Azazel thought it would be pretty funny if he got Samson’s hopes up. Told him that this was definitely, totally the way to freedom, but that the last boss was so hard the others couldn’t get past it. This was a barefaced lie, but Samson believed it in full. Azazel had a pretty good chuckle about it, watching Samson excitedly run around to complete a fools quest. It was good for awhile, up until they got to the boss of ???. The Boss’ form had defaulted to that of Samson, and he reacted extremely poorly to the situation. Samson was an emotional wreck, Azazel had never seen him so upset. He didn’t know why Samson had such an adverse reaction to seeing them. Though the two of them beat ??? and Samson is overjoyed to finally go home. Azazel makes a weak effort to tell Samson the truth, but he jumps in before he could get his words out.

Needless to say, next time the two had a run together, Samson was furious with him. After a lot of shouting and attempted apologies, Samson had enough of Azazel. Samson decides he doesn’t want to deal with Azazel anymore. Azazel can no longer have a run with Samson, because as soon as Samson sees him, Azazel is subsequently beaten to death by his hand. Samson wouldn’t as much as look at Azazel, never mind tolerating going on a run with him.

(I’ll talk about how runs work in a later post, but ending a run can be a really scary and confusing experience for those who aren’t used to it. And when you are expecting to be freed, it’s only made worse)

Last, but certainly not least,

Magdalene ❤️ (10 years old)

I feel bad for poor Magdalene, because at the current moment I probably have the least to say about her.

Hc A (canon-adjacent): She’s a sweet girl at heart. You’ll be hard pressed to find anyone who hates her. Even Judas, who hates pretty much everyone finds her tolerable. She’s protective, caring, an all around good person. Magdalene and Isaac don’t have a great relationship however. Isaac sees striking similarities to her and his mother. And Isaac really doesn’t like his mother. Magdalene wants to know why Isaac doesn’t want to speak with her, but his avoidant way of dealing with people had lead to no results. Her nurturing nature is a powerful one, many would claim that it’s to powerful. She has a tendency to smother people to the point of exhaustion. She wants to know everything about everyone. Which does not boat well with how many of the kids here don’t want to discuss anything other than what’s in front of them. She has quite the attitude for someone who is normally rather kind. Magdalene doesn’t like taking no for an answer and will make a fuss about it. She’s mainly seen as the most tolerable one out of the group out of proxy that everyone else is much worse in comparison.

Hc B (funny): (Not really funny but gotta put something down pfft) Magdalene is a savory food type of person. Of course like any kid she loves sweets, but she’d rather have a nice steak when given the option. Red hearts in the basement taste strongly of iron, similar to that of blood. Her Yum Heart is a replenishable source of the juice inside red hearts that can provide healing. Rather unfortunately this has lead to Magdalene having a taste for blood. Not exactly a great thing to like eating. She’s not going around biting kids trying to suck their blood or anything. But this has lead to her drinking the Yum Heart juice even if she’s not in need of healing. Leading to multiple moments where she has ended up in a situation that could use healing but she used it up haphazardly before. Sometimes she’ll chew on pennies and other metals to appease her craving for the favor of it. She and Blue Baby are the only people who can eat Rotten Meat and not have to force it down. It’s a power play against anyone who sees it.

Hc C (sad boi hours): Before the basement, Magdalene lived in a house of 4. It consisted of her parents, her older brother, and herself. She and her brother aren’t too far apart in age, about a couple years between each other. Magdalene’s older brother was never the nicest person. It’s what most people would see as silly banter and play. He was very rough with her when they would play together. It was unintentional from his side, as he never wanted to hurt her in any way. But from the rude comments and physical play she couldn’t keep up with, Magdalene got easily overwhelmed. She tried to tell her parents, but they brushed it off as “little boy things”. And with the two do them being so young they lacked the ability to properly communicate the issue to one another.

This cycle continued on for a bit. They grew closer as siblings, but Magdalene was still being pushed around more than she liked. She and her brother were being watched by a babysitter as her parents went out to have a few drinks together. Magdalene was already having a bad day from school. With her brother having a night where he wouldn’t let up again, she got fed up she yelled at him to go away. At first the baby sitter didn’t pay to much mind. They were 10 year old siblings, of course they’d have fights sometimes. At some point she made her routine check in with the kids, to find Magdalene was no where to be found. She wasn’t with her brother, in her room, any any of the bedrooms. The babysitter was starting to panic. When asking the son if he knew where Magdalene had gone, he told her that Magdalene had left the house and that she told him she’ll be back by tomorrow morning.

The babysitter was fully freaking out, dashing outside and all the surrounding areas to find her. After finding no leads, they had to call her parents for any clues as they were she could of gone. Soon the police were called in and the entire town was being searched up and down like no tomorrow. Magdalene wasn’t lying when she told her brother that she wanted to be back by tomorrow. She just wanted some space from him, that was all. Either she’s go on her own camping trip, or she’ll go hang out with her friend at the nearby neighborhood. Though her plans to come back the next day didn’t go through, as without warning, she found herself in the basement’s grasps.

Hc D (personal interpretation): Magdalene is a strangely angry person. Her first time she was in the basement was pretty calm. She was happy, bubbly and all that junk. Though in her time there, she’s had become worse. That was to be expected for most, but her turn was more dramatic than most had thought. She is aggressive and not very personable despite how she usually holds herself. If she was upset about something she was going to let you know. Magdalene only getting increasingly more upset with Isaac who is still mostly avoiding her, only making Isaac even more avoidant. For someone who usually wants the best for people she sure did quickly adjust to the murderous life style thrusted upon her. Overall she’s a good person, but I’d watch your back when things get tough.

This meme right here? It’s Magdalene

#basement rambles #tboi #binding of isaac #the binding of isaac #tbh I could go into a lot of depth with Judas’ weird relation with religion cause damn is this kid struggling #I do plan on making that Azazel/Samson section a comic at some point #ooooh these are a lot of fun #if I’m not sent more requests I might just do this for the rest of the cast anyways #gah I could talk about these lads all day

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job-the-prosperous · 3 years

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have you met anyone else in the basement?

((really long post, sorry in advance))

My favorite person here is Bethany. She's always super nice and helpful! We even both have the same quirk where we tend to see angel deals more often. Apparently that's weird according to everyone else. Bethany's is, calming to talk with. We haven't completely lost faith in God. I think most down here have at this point. I... don't think I have. Hard to tell anymore. Sometimes I wonder if I should be following something that has deemed me unworthy.

Um. Anyhow.

The two of us are the only ones who haven't completely given up yet. Except for maybe Isaac.

On the topic of Isaac, he's alright. I have no idea what he thinks of me cause he's always so quiet. I'd say he's shy, but I have a feeling there's something more to it. Isaac is super smart. Always planning ahead and knows just what to do at the nick of time. Very selfless, to a point were I worry about him. Though no one can exactly help him when he refuses to speak.

Magdalene! Would it be wrong of me to say she gives off bad vibes? I can't put my finger on it, cause I don't think she's a bad person. But something just, freaks me out a bit when I'm with her. Other than that she's also a joy to be around. She tells me that one day when we all get out of here she wants to invite us all to her house and make a whole buffet of pastries for us. She never sounds like she believes in her words though.

I have little to say on Lazarus. I've only had one run with him so far, and it wasn't exactly the best first impression. Very jittery and nervous even when we weren't in any danger. Pretty sure as soon as I woke up he had asked me if he wanted me to kill himself so he can get some power boost. Didn't even know his name. The others must pester him a lot about it, poor guy. It's easy to tell how much he hates it. Looking at your own dead body can't be very comforting.

The Forgotten is actually a young girl. Hard to tell given her appearance, but from what she has told me she's only 6 years old. I feel simply awful for her, I can only image how overwhelming this is for them. I mean geez, I can barely handle it and I'm around 4 years older. Still, she's more cheerful than I could ever dream of in our position. Reminds me a lot of my baby sister.

If it wasn't for all of those demons she carries around with her, I'd probably get along better with Lilith. They pick on me all the time and I don't know why. Lilith herself is chill with me. I don't know how she gets around so well with her blindfolds on, but it doesn't seem to affect her any. Okay, so sometimes she'll bump into something but we all do that.

The Lost reminds me a lot of Isaac. Quiet, reserved, all that fun stuff. Unlike Isaac, The Lost is a big ol' meanie sometimes. He's some cranky old man always spewing on about how life is unfair and that I made a mistake on coming here. As if I choose to do this. I can complain all day but in the end I don't blame him for being like this. He has this morbid theory that if he doesn't get out of here soon he'll end up completely consumed and gone forever. Not quite sure what he's referring too, but it's pretty scary. I hope I don't end up like him.

Judas is mean and I hate him. All he does is bully me and complain about how I'm dead weight. If he's not doing that, he's preaching up a storm about how great the devil is and all this weird occult stuff. Swear he does it purposefully to make me upset. So bitter and disconnected. I wouldn't be surprised if he had no friends to speak of. Don't know who would want such negativity in their lives. He loves to act tough but I know for a fact that he's just a big baby. Couldn't care less for him.

Cain and I don't mesh. We are always fighting over supplies, especially coins. You'd think I'd be better off holding them so we'll get more later on, but I guess if he can't have it no one will. Cain cares a lot about people. Unlike Judas he won't throw me into the mouth of a monster for an opening. Something about our personalities make us more prone to being mad at one another.

I suppose I am a bit mean when I call Eve a jerk. She's not nearly as bad as Judas. More so pushy. A her way or the highway type of attitude. At least she's willing to make a few compromises. Even if we don't get along, I always get the farthest on runs when I'm with her. So that's a plus.

Azazel freaks me out a bit, being a demon and all. Loves to pull pranks at all the wrong times. Not a favorable sight but not one I'll despise seeing every time I do. He is funny, I'll give him that much.

Samson is a new breed of uncomfortable. He's like a ticking time bomb seconds away from exploding. If you're lucky he'll go for the monsters. If not, let's just say I've heard lots of rumors of Samson killing the other people just for saying something he didn't like. He may just be blood lusty, always going after a new target. He can be pretty nice to be around when he's not upset, unfortunately its all to uncommon.

Okay, Jacob and Esau are strange. Cause they aren't scary in the way Samson is. Not even the lack of skin on one them is particularly what my problem is. I think Jacob may he purposefully hurting Esau. Like, a lot. They always get into some sort of fight about something. At first it's just a lot of arguing and screaming. Which I get, I did that with my family. But then theirs a point were I'll lose tract of them and I'll never see them again. I never go looking for them. If the entrance to the next floor is open I'm taking it. I, get really scared of what I might see if I did. I hope Esau is okay... I'm sure if I am feeling that extremely malicious vibe from Jacob than Esau must be too. I might just be thinking to deep into it. When you're always on edge, anything can seem like a threat.

I wish I could say more about these guys, but can't speak much on something you don't know. I have heard some rumors about them.

Isaac has muttered about a person named Eden before. A few people had said some things about them. Mostly on how they are way to happy to be here. Admittedly that does sound odd.

Apollyon I have met briefly. I had one run with them, but I died on the first floor. What can I say? They were the first person I met and I had no idea what I was doing. They had helped me with teaching me the basics, so they can't be that bad.

All I've heard about the last person is that I can trust them sometimes and other times I should take them out as soon as possible. Not what I'd call that helpful information. Don't even know who they are talking about.

Job stuffed the key ring back into his pocket. Phew, he had enough spare keys to check out the next item room. He hadn't had the best luck so far, but his angel room had given him some optimism.

More bones?! Really?!? Fine, I guess I'll take it. If I remember correctly this is Bone Spurs. I can't seem to figure out what it does, but I know for sure it doesn't do what the last one does.

He picked up the item, observing the splintered bone for any clue as to what it may do. Job couldn't get anything from a glance alone. Guess he had to put it on for a test ride. The bone had disappeared from his hands, as he felt a slight bit of pressure on the back of his neck. Feeling around a bit, he found one small spot on the middle of his neck where a sharp, jagged piece of bone stuck out. He couldn't feel any noticeable pain from it, which is appreciated. Still, it didn't tell him much on what it did.

Either way, with the new item in tow, he walked back into the catacombs to find this floor's exit.

#the poker chip #main story #asks #((the fact I had somehow managed to randomly get two bone items in a row is pretty funny lmao))#((coming up with a way for bone spurs to be used took a bit of time but eventually I figured it out))#the binding of isaac #binding of isaac #tboi #tboi job #tboi ask blog

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dahlia-coccinea · 3 years

Text

So I think @longagoitwastuesday and I have chatted before about Nelly perhaps having a preference for Heathcliff over Cathy? But I saw it mentioned today and thought it would be interesting to look at some of the instances I can remember that perhaps show this. Personally, I think she doesn’t really defend or is biased towards him (I’d go so far as to say I think she sometimes shows prejudice against him) but they do have an interesting connection since in many ways she was a mother figure to him from 7 to 16 years old. My opinion of Nelly is that once she’s made a judgment about a person it takes quite a lot for her to reshape her opinion of them. Her opinions are also very much emblematic of her position as a servant in the house and that has been discussed already by some critics.

Regarding her biases towards Catherine and Heathcliff, it is apparent Cathy was always the wayward daughter in her mind in part because she caused her master, Mr. Earnshaw, much anxiety and distress. Heathcliff on the other hand inspired sympathy in part because of Mr. Earnshaw’s feelings towards him as we see in Chapter 7:

“I remembered how old Earnshaw used to come in when all was tidied, and call me a cant lass, and slip a shilling into my hand as a Christmas-box; and from that I went on to think of his fondness for Heathcliff, and his dread lest he should suffer neglect after death had removed him: and that naturally led me to consider the poor lad’s situation now, and from singing I changed my mind to crying”

In another scene, a little earlier in Chapter 4, we see where her sympathy for him started to grow while all the children were sick, and after her initial siding with Hindley:

“Heathcliff was dangerously sick; and while he lay at the worst he would have me constantly by his pillow: I suppose he felt I did a good deal for him, and he hadn’t wit to guess that I was compelled to do it. However, I will say this, he was the quietest child that ever nurse watched over. The difference between him and the others forced me to be less partial. Cathy and her brother harassed me terribly: he was as uncomplaining as a lamb; though hardness, not gentleness, made him give little trouble.”

And again in the same chapter after Hindley throws an iron weight at Heathcliff and Heathcliff mentions that Hindley has given him “three thrashings” that week alone and his arm is “black to the shoulder”:

“He complained so seldom, indeed, of such stirs as these, that I really thought him not vindictive: I was deceived completely, as you will hear.”

Eventually, she recants a lot of this early partial softness towards him and she shows fear and hatred towards him notably during the scene of catching him kissing Isabella when she cries, “Judas! Traitor!...You are a hypocrite, too, are you? A deliberate deceiver.” Before that, she describes his visits to the Grange and how she decided she must keep a close eye on him, Catherine, and Isabella, saying:

“I wanted something to happen which might have the effect of freeing both Wuthering Heights and the Grange of Mr. Heathcliff quietly; leaving us as we had been prior to his advent. His visits were a continual nightmare to me; and, I suspected, to my master also.”

But there is something the returns to her now and then, that makes her sympathize with him. After Catherine’s death in Chapter 16, she tells Lockwood:

“Poor wretch!” I thought; “you have a heart and nerves the same as your brother men! Why should you be anxious to conceal them? Your pride cannot blind God! You tempt him to wring them, till he forces a cry of humiliation.”

Surprisingly these feelings of sympathy are during his mistreatment of Isabella. A few days later, being aware that he stayed outside of the Grange, she “opened one of the windows; moved by his perseverance to give him a chance of bestowing on the faded image of his idol one final adieu.” He completely does not deserve her kindness - yet since Nelly does seem to make lasting judgments of people she can’t help but feel for him.

The scene that I think is perhaps most representative of her confused feelings towards him is when she informs him of Catherine’s death:

“He dashed his head against the knotted trunk; and, lifting up his eyes, howled, not like a man, but like a savage beast being goaded to death with knives and spears. I observed several splashes of blood about the bark of the tree, and his hand and forehead were both stained; probably the scene I witnessed was a repetition of others acted during the night. It hardly moved my compassion—it appalled me: still, I felt reluctant to quit him so.”

Her feelings aren’t always so confused though - there are times when her aversion is clear. In Chapter 11 when she talks to little Hareton and “bade him tell his father that a woman called Nelly Dean was waiting to speak with him.” When Hareton brings out Heathcliff instead, she is so struck by fear and dread that she “turned directly and ran down the road as hard as ever I could race, making no halt till I gained the guide-post, and feeling as scared as if I had raised a goblin.”

I know I’m missing quite a few scenes where she expresses true disgust and hatred towards Heathcliff and his actions towards Cathy and Linton but this is getting quite long lol. I think these are enough to show that she does have a complicated understanding of her feelings towards Heathcliff - at least much less clear than her obvious dislike of Catherine.

As I mentioned at the beginning, a lot of her judgments are long-lasting, and tend to side with her master. This is repeated with Cathy II who behaves intolerably to Hareton, yet Nelly is quick to defend or only lightly admonish her, compared to how she easily condemns her mother as “haughty,” “headstrong,” and “saucy.” Some critics believe this is because Cathy II is still good to Edgar, who is Nelly’s master, compared to the grief Catherine Earnshaw caused her father...but I’ll leave those thoughts for another time.

#wuthering heights #analysis #am i missing any other important scenes?#i feel like i am #heathcliff #emily brontë #thoughts

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glittersister · 3 years

Text

Kat’s Bjelland’s 12 Favorite Songs interview - text sourced from here, a now defunct fansite created by “hersir.” Date and publication source unknown

The Replacements - Unsatisfied "It was played 20 times a day. It was always on our turntable. What does it make me think of? Paris. Perfume. An empty Fillmore Street Victorian flat. San Francisco Haight Street. Being very poor. No cigarettes. Cockroaches. Being in a band with Courtney called Sugarbunny Farm. Jennifer throwing her bass at Courtney. Why? It had something to do with migrating to Minneapolis. That's why they wear flannel. It's cold in Minneapolis."

Hair - The Soundtrack "I went to this play with my parents in about fourth or fifth grade. I was the only kid there. I got to see the whole cast naked in the finale. When my parents went out, I'd open the drapes so I could see my bell-bottomed, head-banded reflection, dancing. They sang songs about fellatio, sodomy, cunnilingus, pederasty, drugs; that song "Frank Mills"! I loved it. All that I wanted then was to be a hippy like my mom."

K-Tel - Haunted House Sounds "This was my very first LP. My father obviously didn't realise how cat's screeching, ladies screaming in terror, aliens landing and psychotic laughter could infect/affect and scare little minds. At the time I was really into staring myself down in the mirror until I left my body, then I'd just jerk back and forth to this record or turn into some scary-faced creature. I was grounded a lot but I flew around inside my head."

Rush - 2112 "I was very metal then. Judas Priest, Scorpions, Maiden, Girlschool, Ozzy. Shut up - at least I'm honest! "Cygnus X-1" on "Farewell to the Kings" fairly ruled. Also, no girls I knew really liked Rush, only boys, they sang about weird lands and mystical places."

Miracle Workers - Inside Out "Sixties garage kings, loving it, looking it, the whole part. I dyed my hair black. Matt Rogers from the band helped me pick out my Rickenbacker, inspired me a lot and turned me on to so many bands like the Cramps, plus "Pebbles" compilations, old Fender equipment, tube amps, old pedals....the whole deal. Plus they were the coolest live band ever, except for...."

The Wipers - Alien Boy - Positive Negative "Portland, Oregon, where I was living, was pretty great for bands in the early Eighties. Sage is the perfect last name for The Wiper's Greg. G S = Genius Sage. He taught me about feedback and had a real honest singing style and stage persona. They were my favourite band, and the music reeks of Portland back then. His solo stuff is a definite depression inducer. Perfect."

The Cars - Candy 0 "That song drove me all over Woodburn, Oregon. I was 15 years old. The Dragstrip! Muscles. Cars. Sneaking out at nights. Skipping school. Sex. Keggers, bongs and puke. No, I wouldn't care to explain that."

Kiss - Destroyer "I had the biggest Kiss poster you could get. Me and Alfredo Garcia would open the windows before recess so we could sneak back in and air-guitar to Kiss. I had to be Gene Simmons, God of Thunder: all that is evil is good. The God of Thunder himself said to Maureen that she had a "nice bottom". As in bass. A Rock Pig Joke."

Pixies - Surfer Rosa "Pop sensibility without compromise. Nice spaces and dynamics. Sorta scientific. Great production, great songs. Kim Deal's voice! I love The Breeders. "Pod" is great - beautiful songwriting! I wrote our track "Vomit Heart", after listening to that record.

The Rolling Stones - Exile On Main Street "Acid. I was having my heart ripped out by a guy whose last name was actually Letcher, which inspired most if not all of "Spanking Machine". Depression and wallowing around in it for too long. Stitches. Bandages."

Sonic Youth - Sister "Courtney owed me some money, the exact cost of this record, so she bought it for me. I'd only heard the "Kill Yr Idols" '45, with Kim screaming. I felt reassured after that and realised I actually was writing "songs". I hadn't grasped the concept of "No Rules" right away."

Staple Sisters - Uncloudy Day "It reminds me of living in London. Being in love in a different country. Eating too many eggs. "Old Matey". Manor House. James (Johnston, Gallon Drunk singer and ex-beau) bought me this record. It's so beautiful it makes me cry. I listened to it when I found out that my mom had died. That line "Tell Heaven I'm Coming Home" hurts my heart."

#Kat Bjelland #Babes in Toyland #my posts

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yikesharringrove · 4 years

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hop or max (or both👀) realise how close bill and steve have become and love it because they can just see how happy the boys are

The two boys hadn’t noticed Hop standing there.

They were sitting, pressed hip to hip on the stairs outside the Byers’ when he arrived to pick up El.

They were passing one cigarette back and forth despite the full pack sitting between them, and the outline of a pack he could see in Billy’s breast pocket.

They were talking softly, giggling, touch lingering as they passed the cigarette back and forth.

Billy’s face was soft, was open when he looked at Steve. Hop didn’t know much about the kid, but had heard stories, stories of how rough and tumble he tended to be, how he was hard and mean.

He looked like a damn teddy bear next to Harrington on the steps.

And Jesus, Steve was almost unrecognizable to Hopper.

He had known the kid for a long time, knew his dad all through school, knew Steve when he got old enough to start causin’ trouble.

He had seen Steve looking bored and proper, like he was above everything, like he was too good for Hawkins. He had seen Steve get knocked down a few hundred pegs, had seen him rattling about the town with a nervous twitch in his shoulder, a crazed glint in his eye and a spiked bat in his trunk.

Hell, he’d even seen the kid breakdown, had found him in the woods one night, crashing through with his bat, had started spewing off about how he needed to make sure they were all gone, that everyone’s safe.

(He had cried and shook and slept on Hop’s couch for about a day and a half after that.)

He was used to the spoiled little prince, or the haunted teen with trauma past his years.

He was not used to this carefree boy, this giggly mess sitting next to his friend, sharing a cigarette.

He liked the look on Steve. Liked the line of his shoulders when they weren’t carrying the weight of the world.

Max huffed.

She had been woken up by a few thumps in Billy’s room. He had originally figured Neil was in there being awful, but then she heard giggles, unmistakable teenage girl giggles.

That gave way into unmistakable teenage girl moans.

She slammed a pillow over her head, blocking out the high-pitched whimpering. It was the same as the past few nights.

This girl, whoever she was, Billy must like her if she kept sneaking into his bedroom.

Usually, Billy was sneaking out, not letting this girl in.

When the noises had stopped, she took the pillow off her head.

“Sucks that your parent are home. It makes me nervous, you comin’ here. When do they leave again?” She rolled over, didn’t care to hear the chick’s response. She put on her headphones, falling asleep to the Metallica tape still in Billy’s walkman, didn’t hear Steve say, just two more nights, Bill.

“You need any help?” Hop was elbows deep in the sink, scrubbing at the dishes from dinner.

Steve was leaning against the counter, rolling up his sleeves. He didn’t wait for an answer, just shoved himself next to Hop and began scrubbing.

“You and Hargrove seem to be close.” He was too focused on rubbing the stains off of Joyce’s dishes to see how Steve’s cheeks went red.

“Yeah, we’re friends.”

“I think you’re good for each other. You both seem better.”

“‘Do you mean better?” Hop shrugged.

“He doesn’t seem as pissed off. I haven’t given him a speeding ticket in over two weeks for rage driving, and you haven’t seemed so, I don’t know, fucked up.”

Steve had to put the dish down as he laughed, was laughing so fucking hard he had to squat down, try to collect himself. He wiped his eyes when he stood back up.

“He’s secretly a really nice person. Don’t tell him I said that.” Hop winked at him.

Max threw Billy a weird look.

She had asked for a ride to Steve’s house, which was met with a I’ll be ready in ten from Billy. Twenty minutes of him getting his hair just so, they set off.

And then Billy got out of the car with her, walked her to Steve’s door.

“Don’t you got a date?” Billy just furrowed his brows at her. She looked pointedly at his clothes, the red shirt he only wore on his dates, almost all the way unbuttoned.

“Nah. Just haven’t done laundry in a while.” He was staring her down.

“Are you and Steve even friends?” But he didn’t answer. The door swung open, revealing Steve dressed casually in a pair of sweats. He smiled at Max, ushering her inside to the kitchen with the rest of the brats as he stepped onto the porch to talk to Billy.

She doubled back.

“You look nice. Got a date?”

“Yeah. Leggy brunet. Totally hot. Has this tight ass, is such a slut.” She cringed at the way her brother was talking about this poor girl. Plus, ehy had he lied to Max, said he didn’t have a date.

“Sounds like a wet fucking dream.” Billy muttered shuddup as Steve laughed.

Steve was making fun of Billy, as wasn’t getting the shit beaten out of him for it.

“Well, come in then. It’s cold.” It really wasn’t but she raced off to join the others in the kitchen, left too soon to see Billy pin Steve against the door, kiss him roughly for a few seconds.

Billy snuck out again, after dropping her off at home.

Hop was on quarry duty tonight.

It was Valentine’s Day, which meant most of Hawkins’ young couples would be parked at the quarry or Lovers’ Lake or one of the other lookout make out spots.

Hop was wandering through with a flashlight, knocking on windows with a Hawkins PD, get outta here, you’re trespassing.

He came upon Billy Hargrove’s unmistakable car, the dark blue Camaro parked under a large tree, mostly hidden from the other’s.

He was expecting to knock on the back window, but heard voices coming from the hood.

Billy and Steve were passing what smelled like a joint back and forth, laying back on the windshield looking at the stars.

“Fuck knows I got no other plans for this year. I don’t mind waiting.”

“It’s a whole year, Steve. You’d be stuck here until I graduate.”

“What else am I gonna do?”

“You might still get into Chicago.”

“Don’t hold your breath, Bill.”

Hopper came stomping up to their line of sight. Steve put out the joint against the side of the car and tossed it into the bushes.

“Subtle.” Billy shrugged at Hop.

“I was expecting to have to pull you off some girl, Hargrove.”

“Hawkins chicks ain’t really my type.” Hop just shook his head.

“Well, you two are still trespassing. Services roads closed at six.” Steve just nodded vigorously as he slid off the car.

“We’ll scurry right off, Hop. Sorry.”

“And if you two are gonna smoke, please do it in a house, or somewhere I can’t smell it.”

The two slammed themselves in the car, Hop could hear them laugh as the car roared to life.

Max was digging through the backseat of Billy’s car, trying to find her skateboard.

He had hidden it from her, like a fucking child, so she snagged his keys when he was too busy being a meathead, working out in the living room.

It was as gross as she was expecting. Billy like to keep his car very clean, especially compared to his pigsty of a bedroom.

She picked up an old worn sweatshirt, found a plain shoebox underneath.

She didn’t want to snoop, but she was curious.

There were a few pictures of Billy’s mom right on top. She only recognized her from the necklace around her neck, the one Billy now refused to take off.

There were some movie ticket stubs, a big wad off cash she made a mental note of, a slip of paper she recognized from a fortune cookie from the place Billy would take her on Thursdays after school in California to get their two for one entree special. He had some jewelry in there, probably more of his mom’s, and a gaudy valentine covered in glitter.

She closed the box, didn’t care to dig further than the valentine, didn’t see Steve’s neat handwriting inside of it, the pictures Billy hoarded underneath it, pictures of Steve, pictures of him and Steve, even a few saucy ones of Steve.

Instead she turned her attention to the hoodie, to the faded Hawkins High Swim Team on the front.

She gave it back to Steve next time she saw him.

“Found it in my brother’s car.”

It would be back in a few weeks, anyway.

Hop opened the door to the cabin when Steve rapt on it.

He was toting a bunch of board games, was there to watch El for the night.

Hop raised his eyebrows when Steve set them down, revealing the faded Judas Priest shirt. He knew Steve liked shitty pop, wouldn’t be caught dead listening to hard rock.

“Nice shirt.” Steve looked down at himself, going red.

“Oh shit, Bill slept over last night, he must’ve left it.”

And then Hop noticed the bruises. The dark hickies on his neck, just under the stolen shirt.

Hop’s pretty sure he would’ve never heard the end of it if Steve had a girlfriend, pretty sure the kid’s would’ve lost their shit over it.

So Steve maybe was dating in secret, dating a boy in secret, a boy he spent Valentine’s Day with, a boy he giggled with and shared cigarettes with, a boy who’s shirts he stole and forgot he was wearing them.

But Steve was soft when he sat down next to El, smiled at her nicely and asked about the book she was reading.

So Hop shrugged, and went to his late shift.

“You wanna go to the mall?” Billy was standing weirdly in her doorway, trying to make himself look like he belonged there. “Could call up that chick friend of yours.”

She narrowed her eyes at him.

“What’s the catch.”

“No catch. Just needed to get something from the mall. Thought you’d wanna go.” He had been acting really off lately.

He’d been talking to her how they used to, before Neil doubled down and moved them halfway across the country. He had even made a joke the other day, one that wasn’t a mean comment masquerading as a joke.

“Lemme call El. Maybe Hop would drop her off.” She was even more suspicious as he smiled at her, went to back to his room. She talked to El for a moment, who said Hop would drop her off in ten minutes.

She poked her head in Billy’s room, saw him looking in the mirror, primping himself.

“Does your girlfriend work at the mall?” He gave her a withering stare.

“Don’t have a girlfriend.” She grinned.

“You so do. You know, I heard her sneaking in here a few months ago. I know that you sneak out to go and see her.” Billy flushed. “And it’s always the same voice, so don’t lie and say it’s different girls you perv.”

“Shut up, Maxine.”

“Make me, William.” He stamped his foot like a little kid.

“That’s it! No more mall for you today. I’m just gonna go by myself.” She blocked him in the doorway.

“Just tell me her name.” He shook his head.

“Fine. Tell me where she works and El and I will leave you two alone.” He shifted his jaw around.

“She works at Scoops Ahoy?”

“Isn’t that where Steve works?”

“He introduced us.”

But, But that didn’t add up. Billy had been seeing this girl long before Steve started working there. Maybe they knew each other before? No, Steve famously didn’t have any friends besides the party when Billy started sneaking around with that gir-

And then it hit her.

The fucking sweatshirt.

The Hawkins High Swim Team sweatshirt.

Leggy brunet. Totally hot. Has this tight ass, is such a slut.

She almost threw up.

Steve was her brother’s secret girlfriend. How did she not fucking see this.

“Cool. We’ll let you two be gross or whatever.”

He gave her a tiny smile. She was trying her best not to scream.

Hopper dropped El off and Billy drove them to the mall, let Max pick the music and at one point, had even hummed along to the Hall & Oates song. Fucking Rich Girl.

She pulled El along to The Gap when they hit the mall, Billy making a beeline for Scoops.

“We’re gonna spy on Billy.” El just smiled slyly and nodded vigorously.

They crouched behind plants out in front of Scoops, could just hear Billy talking to Steve’s coworker.

“Dingus, your homoerotic rival turned lover is here.” Steve’s shoes squeaked as he launched himself from the back room. Max’s hands were clammy. She was right.

“Don’t be so loud, Rob.”

“There’s no one here.” Max heard a sound like something being hit dully. Steve yelped. Billy just slapped his ass. “But, you are not allowed to leave me for more than your fifteen. Not like last week. The rush came and I was alone for an hour, Steve. An hour.”

“O-kay, Rob. We’ll be quick.”

“And disinfect any surface you two fuck on. I refuse to touch that.” Billy roared with laughter as Steve squawked indignantly. Max peeked up to watch Steve drag Billy into the backroom. Billy grinned at Robin, a really nice, happy smile before turning to Steve.

#im sorry for being super inactive #ive been having a bunch of health issues #yikes writes #steve harrington #billy hargrove #harringrove #steve harrington x billy hargrove #billy hargrove x steve harrington #harringrove fic #harringrove ficlet #harringrove drabble

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shimmershae · 3 years

Text

My thoughts on Episode 3--Hunted.

Most of you lovelies already realize this, but my thoughts tend to zig and zag quite a bit, lol. So. To save some of you the headache and spare you from seeing spoilers you’d rather not see yet, I’m again placing them behind a cut.

First things first. I have totally turned into Yvette Nicole Brown with her TWD notebooks, lol, and I’m not even sorry. I just felt like it would be fun to go back when the final episode is in the books and see how well my thoughts from these early episodes line up with what I’m feeling when we say our (not-so) final goodbyes.

But that’s enough about that. Let’s get to this thing.

It really is insane how very much I love Melissa McBride. Just hearing her doing the previously on TWD recap voiceover makes me ridiculously happy.

Cole! Dude! We hardly knew ya.

Not gonna lie. That first shot of Maggie in all the chaos reminded of a shirt I’ve seen. It says--”Well, well, well. If it isn’t the consequences of my actions.”

I have to hand it to Angela and the rest of her team. These opening scenes--on all 3 episodes--have been BOMB so far. They really hook you in right away. At least IMHO.

I realize I’m behind the game on this little tidbit, but how much do I adore the fact that Dog is now in the opening credits?

Okay. Alexandria might look like it’s been on some kind of post-apocalyptic bender but all our girls are looking beautiful as ever. Maybe it’s Maybelline, lol.

I love to see Kelly and Carol still gravitating toward each other. It really speaks to each woman’s heart. Carol wants to make amends so badly and Kelly just has the most lovely, warm, forgiving heart.

Carol’s point about Alexandria still needing the horses to help with the heavy lifting and pointing out the walls and rebuilding won’t matter quite as much if they’re limited by their hunger and what they can physically lift on their own isn’t wrong. But I’m sure the same viewers that were okay with Daryl and Co. going out on Maggie’s suicide mission (using the same reasoning) and saying it made sense for the bigger picture will pretend not to recognize that the same element is there in Carol’s desire to go out there and look for the horses. You know. Because it was Carol’s idea and not that of their fave(s).

Aaron, Man. Or maybe I should say Angela. You just had to put a pit of dread in my belly mentioning Buttons like that. RIP, Buttons. You deserved better. I’m still traumatized.

Look at all the babies bonding. Look at RJ getting to sit at the big kid table.

“My mom always comes back.” She damn well better. Those babies need her. Until she does, though, Uncle Daryl and Aunt Carol (and Aunt Rosita and everybody else) are going to be there.

Anyway. Poor RJ. He barely ever gets any lines, lol.

Hershel and Judith are obviously the mini-adults in this group and baby Rhee is already more cynical and jaded than his sweet daddy was until they reached Alexandria and the wheels started to come off.

So. Does Maggie just think everybody’s already dead here or what? Hmm.

You know. Any building can be creepy AF when the lights are off and it’s dark, lol. Any building.

So much darkness so far this season. I’m going to have to invest in some blackout curtains. I just know it.

Where are all those stairs leading? Why am I thinking of Hitchcock? Am I mixing up my scary, suspenseful movies? Probably.

Of fucking course, Maggie dropped her flashlight. Thank goodness she had that lighter at the ready just before Ghost Face Reaper took a swipe at her.

Is that Father G with a screwdriver impaled in his thigh? Listen. These people deserve a Mega Bottle of pain killers and a week just vegging out in a soft, luxurious bed.

All these horror movie tropes. Some of them are cheesy, yes. But I’m totally here for it.

LMAO. That’s it, Maggie. A good old punch in the nuts works every time.

Alden really is having a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day.

Negan is still Negan. Self-serving and looking out for number one. But I believe the man really does feel the group is his group too. He’s like that long lost, sketchy uncle nobody wants to acknowledge much less invite to the dinner table, but that bond? However thin? Is there.

I am both hating that Maggie is being forced to work with the man that murdered her husband (my baby Glenn) and finding it fascinating the lengths she’s willing to go to survive. This your plan, Angela?

Rosita and Carol! How sad is it that the last really significant scene I can remember the two of these women sharing was way back? Before Rick and Co. attacked Negan’s outpost and Maggie and Carol were subsequently taken? If only the show had done more of these kind of scenes.

How much do I love all the girls working together? Gimps would never. They’d all be stuck back at Alexandria minding the kids and the community.

Shallow aside--Rosita is so pretty in this scene.

Rosita being worried about Carol honestly makes my heart hurt, because it’s about damn time more of them actually did. Her saying Abraham is trying to tell her something in her dreams is interesting. Angela sure loves her dreams, doesn’t she?

Where are Daryl’s dreams, hmm? No. Seriously. I guess they want to give some viewers plausible deniability until the bitter end.

“Really? We’re just gonna go toward the screaming? Cool.” Hahaha. You know. Even the smart people in horror movies sometimes bite it, Negan. Just saying. Maggie really does need to “stop running up the staircase” when she could just run out the front door though, lol.

Poor Duncan. I think you could have been another Tyreese, Jerry type for me.

WTF does this show have against horses? Those poor creatures.

Kelly is totally me right now. I’d be freaking inconsolable.

Carol needed that hug. Thank you, Magna. From the bottom of this tired fangirl’s heart, thank you.

Why give us that beautiful, golden shot with the horses when you’re planning to stab us through the heart later and twist the knife. Oh. Yeah. That’s exactly why.

Oh snap! Father G’s delivery when he tells that Reaper “I’m not. God isn’t here anymore.” Cold as ice.

Judas. That the Reapers’ work. Or. Damn. Either way, that’s harsh.

Back to what Alden was saying. All these oprhaned children. Who’s going to take on Adam if he dies? That poor kid has had a rough go of it. Knowing that, makes you wonder what Alden was thinking volunteering for the suicide mission.

Omigosh. There went Agatha. Terrible way to go. Right, Beatrice?

I’m sobbing. Carol with the horse. That hurt my baby so much but she hurt herself for her family the same way she has been doing since the Prison. Melissa Mcbride? When she cries, I cry. Every effin’ time. Aaron being there just made it hurt more. But at least someone was there to see how and really take in how she continues to break pieces of herself off to keep her family as whole and safe and happy as she can.

Rewinding a minute--that Magna and Carol conversation. I get Magna’s reasoning too. I do. But Angela is just making everything so dire right now so that the sun when Connie is ultimate found shines a ltitle brighter.

Those babies know they’re eating horse. I could never.

That’s got to be a different Coco. She’s even smaller. But she’s gorgeous.

Fucking finally. Angela having the other characters notice after an eternity of being blind to it, just how much Carol sacrifices of herself for them. It’s so long overdue and I imagine Rosita’s even more worried for Carol now. It’s a shame it’s taken 11 seasons. My baby’s had blood on her hands trying to keep her family safe and whole and happy and fed for a long damn time. So heartbreaking watching her try to scrub the blood away.

Sweet, sweet hug that Kelly gave Magna. She’s such a sweetheart kid sis to all of them, isn’t she?

Interesting place of refuge. A gutted church. A visual symbol, Angela, of where Maggie and the rest of our people are now perhaps?

“It’s easy for you, isn’t it? Being reckless with sombody’s life...” Maggie. Maggie. Those words would have hit so much harder if we hadn’t spent the majority of the last 2.5 episodes watching you ignore sound advice just because it came out of the mouth of somebody you (justifiably) hate.

But will Alden be there when Maggie and Negan get back? That is the question. Or will he eventually Lucille himself?

That little bit of lineup Negan music to remind the audience of Negan lovers and sympathizers that he once took great pleasure in murderously swinging a bag at people’s heads was a nice, subtle touch there. Like agree with her or not, Maggie is literally left to rely on the hope, however small it is, that Negan has changed just enough that he won’t try to finish a job he taken on years before--killing what’s left of her.

Oh lawd. Next episode sees the return of a character literally nobody asked for. How excited am I not?

Dog better not be harmed or so help me.

Now for Angela’s weekly explanations of WTF she/there were thinking because they been doing this plausible deniability thing so long some people out there watching with biased, muddy stan glasses can no longer separate head canon from canon.

Is Maggie worried at all about Daryl or does she just assume his superhero powers are in full effect in this episode?

“You can’t really say it wasn’t going to happen anyway.” Not Angela pointing out that simply laying the blame for literally everything bad that ever happens at Carol’s feet isn’t the answer. Say it louder for those in the back. Alpha was going to do what Alpha wanted to do.

“There is love there. There is respect there. However, there’s also frustration...” You damn skippy. Friendships and human relationships are complex AF. Like Carol. She’s honestly one of the most complicated characters on this show and any show, IMHO. That’s what makes her so memorable and such a lightning rod for discussion.

I know I might be in a minority, but I really feel like they need more of those little scenes between the kids to keep things real.

Kang saying she always feels like she’s going to get murdered in a staircase or parking lot is relatable, funny, and sad all at the same time. It’s a girl thing.

Why is Carol’s story giving me Dark Knight vibes? Like I feel like she’ll gladly shoulder the burden of their distrust, their hate, or their judgment as long as the hard choices she makes keeps them safe. And she’s still ultimately going to come back to save their asses even when they forsake her. Just like Bruce Wayne/Batman. Am I reaching too far, lol? Because sometimes I do that.

Anyway. This is the third episode of the season and the third episode in a row that I mostly enjoyed. I don’t know if I’m just so relieved and happy to have all the characters and my show back or what, but overall? I’ve been pleased with the episodes and found something to love in all of them.

There’s a much stronger horror vibe woven throughout Season 11 so far. I feel like it’s a return to the roots of the show and I like that. Literally none of the characters are making perfect choices and this viewer is here for it. My only complaint so far is there hasn’t been enough Carol but what we’ve been given has felt like a gift and significant in a way that Gimps’ version was not. Also? I really hope the trend of the ladies working together and supporting each other continues because they rule the TWD world, lol.

Hope you enjoyed at least some of my TWD word vomit.

Until next episode.

#The Walking Dead #Season 11 #TWD spoilers #things that make me smile and cry #for reasons #my heart

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