#sotong txt

[bisexualrapline]

idk why but every time namjoon types a romanized word into the chat and refuses to let it go i cry laughing

#i actually SCREAMED at J-BOSEOK #LIKE FKSKDKSDLDLD. #and then SOTONG #he’s so fucking funny i’m still crying #.txt #run bts

[pekorosu]

i rly wanna know what’s going on off-frame here

#if those are even real legs LOL #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

it’s honestly so funny to me how the only reason spn got so much attention the past few weeks was bc of cas’ confession in 15x18. if it weren’t for that, the show would have died quietly like it should have. im sorry if you have good feelings for the show and maybe the scene meant something to you, but for me, the fact that they genuinely thought doing that sort of thing without following up on it was in any way OKAY in 2020 is just. wow. wooooooooohoooowowooooooooowwwwwwwwwwww. they deserve to be dragged thru the mud forever for that alone.

#i know they discussed it among themselves blahblah it still doesnt make any sense #it's not just that it's a bad trope in general but like #incredibly stupid considering the series' reputation for queerbaiting (whether u believe its true or not thats their rep) #and mocking and deriding shippers #doesn't matter that they had the best intentions at heart #this is what they left behind. this is their legacy. nice. congrats #they raised their own stakes when no one asked for it and for what? just to fart all over it? lol #and im sure they knew they'd never address it ever again so why even go there? #at least if they didn't they could still have plausible deniability #(and better reception to the ending lmao) #but nope. thanks to that ep they've just /cemented/ their reputation as biggest queerbait #im not even mad im just very confused #since they could've easily done without it #anyway woop woop gonna move on now #got better things to spend my time on #also probs gonna delete some posts later don't want my blog cluttered up with salty spn posts lol #sotong txt #supernatural #spn

[pekorosu]

it's already been 2 years since i got back into banana fish. wow. this is probably the longest i've ever stuck with a series that is not ongoing.

i think it's helped that i've generally stayed away from fandom to keep from burning out too quickly. what usually happened in the past was that i would get into a series, make a sideblog for it, get SUPER INTO FANDOM like tracking the tag, reblogging and liking lots of stuff and engaging with every little thing, and then exhaust myself within a few months or so. and then i would move on.

i didn't want that to happen with BF, so i made a point of NOT making a sideblog, and after the anime ended i pretty much cut myself off from fandom (besides occasionally engaging with a few ppl who were super nice to reach out to me, bless their hearts). i just didn't want the fire to burn out before it was time, bc i had (and still have) so many things i wanna draw... and this author's fics that i wanna translate... 

i know i don't have to make it sound so permanent, like, why don't i just take a break and come back later, right? but the thing is, i’m not sure if i actually can?  that was what happened with ace attorney... i still have folders full of WIPs for that one, and something inside me just says i'll never be able to go back to them again even when i want to. for some reason, the moment i left, that phase just became permanently over. (i still wanna play DGS someday tho. someday.....)

but it's so weird, isn't it? i should be looking forward to moving on, shouldn't i? having new interests, having new things to fall in love with... those are good things. but i don't know. i feel like i'm not ready to let go yet.

hate to compare it to this but it feels like having a smelly blanket and not knowing when someone is going to snatch it away from you now that you’re too old for it. it sucks to have no control over this, to have your brain stuck in one gear and the moment you switch it’s just... gone forever.

#sotong txt #nth important... just personal fandom-related musings

[pekorosu]

hi hello all how yall doin?

#i apologise for taking forever to reply to some people #just feeling a lil wack lately #on the plus side i finally have a degree now #kinda useless in this economy but hey at least i finished smth for once in this measly life of mine ha ha #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

btw... made these hokkaido chiffon cupcakes again last year but didn’t post it

#the reason was bc i wanted to start a jp-only blog where i can practise writing ONLY in japanese #and these were going to be in the first post #(not my recipe tho) #...anyway i gave up on that plan ._. #food #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

im glad guardpollo still remains the top post for my ace attorney blog. a crack ship is the perfect representation of that shitpost central. good times.

#sotong txt #shit ive been here too long need to log off now

[pekorosu]

lowkey annoyed that fandoms have moved to twitter and then now discord... like, i want to interact with ppl but i absolutely hate instant messaging style stuff. tumblr is already bad enough as it is but people keep moving to faster and faster mediums. i hate that everything moves so quickly these days. kinda wish things would go back to forum/lj style.

#sotong txt

[pekorosu]

hehehe...

hehehehe..........

#a reward for completing most tasks i planned to do today #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

im going to try to put away ALL distractions for the next week or so, only allowing myself 30 mins on them when i get up and before i sleep, because i have once again committed the crime of procrastinating until the last minute. wish me luck

#sotong txt #AGAIN #I NEVER LEARN

[pekorosu]

haven’t read BL in a loooooong time but i picked one up today! no regrets :)

初恋、カタルシス。(First love, catharsis) by Hatokawa Nuko

so basically it’s your usual fluffy slice-of-life romance, except the protag tsukishima ikki is nonsexual! (aka “romantic asexual” in english)

spoilery thoughts ahead:

the story revolves around him and his boyfriend karakida touma, who is your average label-less/straight-with-an-exception BL dude. in contrast, ikki explicitly identifies as nonsexual. 

that said, there still are sex scenes, so it's very much an “asexual who’s okay with sex” depiction. THAT SAID, ikki is also sex averse to a certain extent... and that’s where the consent gets a lil iffy. but it’s the kind of thing that most ace people would understand, i think. the conflict between wanting to assert your boundaries but feeling guilty for not being able to “provide” in that sense, and genuinely wanting to make your partner happy by indulging them...

i mean, karakida is a chill loving dude, but also a v sexual person and so, his pushiness kinda borders on dubcon? particularly so in one scene, which ends up leading to a breakup. and it’s obvious that ikki’s not always okay with it, even when he says he is. although, by the end of it all, they seem to have come to an acceptable arrangement.

personally tho, i can relate and am okay with the gray areas, but i know some people might not be okay with anything that’s not active enthusiastic consent so i’m raising flags here just in case. considering the genre’s infamy for rape tho, i’d say the issue with consent here was tackled realistically.

but speaking about sex scenes, what i absolutely LOVED was the fact that there was NO anal sex at all. heavy focus on relationship moments and NO RIDICULOUS OBSSESSION WITH STICKING IT UP THE BUTT BEING THE PINNACLE OF TRUE LOVE? IVE BEEN WAITING FOREVER FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS IN BL GOD FUCKING BLESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i do think it's super convenient that the “uke" is the one who's nonsexual tho, bc well, being a “prude” and constantly being pestered by the horny seme is like THE traditional BL setup lol.

but anyway, i don’t actually have an issue with it bc i feel like ikki’s nonsexuality is treated with proper nuance without it being too in-your-face or preachy, if you get what i mean? i get the feeling that it’s probably personal to the artist, or at least, they’ve done their research and isn’t just using this as a quirky trope.

the manga probs won't be very satisfying for ppl who want to read about aces in committed romantic relationships without sex, but well. it's rare enough to find one that acknowledges it's possible to be in love without experiencing sexual attraction, so i consider this a godsend.

also the character interactions are adorable, haha. don’t wanna end up quoting and spoiling everything, but rn my mood is that lil extra where karakida’s like “look snow! don’t you wanna play?” and ikki’s like “how old do you think i am?” and karakida just launches him into the snow and ikki’s like “...pls do it again.” lol

oh yeah, there's a scene where karakida sorta conflates gender with sexuality? he tells ikki "you’re fine the way you are, you’re you, you’re ikkigender" or something like that. idk if it’s a mistake or a cultural difference or meant to highlight karakida’s cluelessness... i’m inclined to think it’s the last one, bc ikki replies with “i have a dick, you know” (implied: i’m still a man) which. eh. casual cissexism but p standard fare /shrug. but anyway for a moment i was like uhhhhhhhhhhh ok. lol.

the art style is nice too... it swings from a clean and beautifully detailed style, to a very uniquely hilarious one imo. see below:

i esp love it when their noses just vanish. looked a lil awkward to my eyes at first but ended up growing on me. so silly looking hehe

anyway if you're interested and can read japanese, feel free to give it a go. i purchased mine from pixiv, but it’s probs available elsewhere :)

#a BL manga with an asexual protag??? #yes you read that right #this isn't a proper review just jotting down some thoughts ya #hatsukoi catharsis #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

havent had mcd in so long. probs weird to describe fast food this way but it was absolutely decadent (*´﹃｀*)

#why are they selling prosperity burger in december tho? #not that im complaining :x #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

had a dream that i met this white, long haired dog and i asked it, “how do you spell ‘puppy’?” and it went, “PUPPY??? P-P-I-P” and then i laughed so hard i think i laughed out loud while asleep

#wth man... #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

high feel. feels high.

#sotong txt #genuinely cannot remember why i wrote this

[pekorosu]

hepi new year..... 🎉

#tbh have been feeling kinda down lately #and also kinda in denial that its already 2021 #gonna go have a floor day ._. #sotong txt

[pekorosu]

i like the idea of making a fanzine with some like-minded people, but the banana fish fandom feels big and distant and has so many talented people that it scares the shit outta me and i feel like i’m Not Worthy, so i'm thinking it would be nice to do one for this other fandom i'm in, but that fandom is so tiny (it literally embodies that "when u love smth but the fandom consists of 6 ppl and a shoelace" post) that idk if it's even worth going through the trouble of making a zine (sides, there’s already a yearly gift exchange event over there). also i've never done a zine before. idk how it would work. that one ace attorney doujinshi anthology doesn't count btw, bc all i did was submit my part and didn't have to worry about the nitty gritty details re: formatting/printing/publishing/etc. also it would be really depressing if no one even wants it LOL. also i shouldn't be thinking about this right now. got a freakin exam to cram for. /punches myself in the face

#sotong txt #maybe someday