#tengo tantas cosas que decir que podria ser un informe

[lucianinsanity]

Hi Lucian! How does your writing or art reflect and/or challenge the values you grew up with? These could be cultural, family, and/or personal values and beliefs.

Alright, let's see, this one's hard

Well, I do belive I grew up being taught to be accepting and kind, so I guess that reflects on the way I do art

Also, kinda fucked up, but since I grew up religious (catholic) I went to church a lot, and they really hammered in that there's value on your pain, that suffering is something you do and has value (most of my family doesn't agree with this, but you know, when you hear "place a stone in your shoe, because heaven belongs to the suffering ones " you internalize that shit), so it kinda impacts the way I write about pain and suffering

I do believe pain has value, but not as something you have to do or you have to experience, but as, a human thing that happens, and ignoring it is not good, what I was taught is to live with it, to stay silent and just be grateful of being able to do stuff even with pain

I think feeling what you feel is important, not just brushing it off, but actually sitting and feeling it, so I try to represent that, suffering is not shameful or silent, but is also not something that you do to yourself because punishing yourself makes you a good person

Also, in the aspect of being morbid, the idea that what you think hurts others even if you don't act on it

Struggled a lot having intrusive toughts and liking horror and all that, I like writing sad and painful stuff, I like making characters suffer, I like when there's scary shit, and being morbid is like "bad" or whatever, but it's just something that happens, we love hearing and telling stories where people suffer, and even now I stuggle with censoring myself when I write, I want to write a lot more tbh

And I also mean in enjoying sad stuff, a lot of people that I know in real life seem to be so uncomfortable or just confused by the idea of enjoying sad stories (or horror stories), mostly "why would you do that if it makes you feel bad", sometimes you need to, crying or getting scared safely helps a lot sometimes (and it's fun to make people upset in a safe way too, we both know what you're getting into when I tag "hurt no comfort")

In the art part, boobs, nudity is neutral, and bodies have different shapes and colors and sizes and they are all so fun and wonderful, people who don't like drawing fat people are missing on the fun of making so many curved lines (I enjoy them way too much, all my art looks squishy even when I don't want it to)

Also it's in no way subtle, but I do draw myself as a demon for a reason

And I love art unapologetically, it's hard being an artist, I do good art, I love what I do, and I truly believe this is my calling, this is what I want to do with my life, I do art with full sincerity and that makes people uncomfotable sometimes (mostly my family, but whatever)

I don't know if this truly answers what you asked me 😅

#writing #I should also probably start doing more kinky shit but you will not see that on Tumblr yet #art #bye an sanity #freedominique #answered #I just said a lot of stuff here #ay #luci an's art #luci an's writing #sigo editando esto #tengo tantas cosas que decir que podria ser un informe #mas que nada divagando sobre mi vida pero eso es demasiado personal para el internet