#the cruel reality of life

[rayyzcosmos]

the one who notices and remembers every tiny details about everyone, is the one who is ignored the most.

#sad but true #its the overthinkers #bro its so sad #the cruel reality of life #self deprecating humor #dark humor #this fucking hurts #feelings #hurts #aesthetic

[izhape]

no offense intended really but this genuinely must be coming from someone who has no experience around cattle. there's a huge difference between putting an animal out of its misery humanely because it will absolutely suffer and die a slow painful death and comparing this to disabled people is just so ucky to me....

#txt #no shade to this person i understand where they're coming from but. it isn't kind at all to make these animals suffer for some moral high #ground. source: lived on a ranch and my family are ranchers #it's not because 'its just an animal' that's a cruel way to see it #also my rancher family is INDIGENOUS we know how to properly take care of animals they are not colonizer settler ranchers. to clarify #this is about the two-headed calf that got popular on here for a while #anyways um. cows can't tell you how much pain they're in a majority of the time. it's great that we want to try our best to help them live #a happy life even if it's short it is genuinely a nice idea but in reality she was going to get sores and infections and she was in constant #agony

[ahdriking]

I've been thinking a lot about Porsche post season 1, and it's honestly taken me a really long time to come to terms with what I think the future holds for him (and a potential season 2, my version of it anyway), but I think i've finally figured out that niggling feeling at the back of my mind telling me that this is the calm before the storm.

This isn't Porsche's happy ending. How could it be? The show went to great lengths to demonstrate to us and remind us time and time again that Porsche hates loan sharks and predators, and that's exactly what he's become. And it is what he's become. The show may never give it to us in explicit detail, but we're made aware that the role of the second family is very different to the first family. Their role is the dark, bloody, messy bullshit that the first family can't afford to sully their hands with. It's the racketeering, extortion, drugs, torture, gang wars, murder and violence that is typical of the real mafia world. Porsche, an orphan who spent his entire life under the yoke of loan sharks, is now responsible for operating a bloody and violent criminal empire. And that's supposed to be his happily ever after?

In reality, I don't think Porsche would ever have accepted the role and the ring if Kinn hadn't been the one offering them to him, and even then I don't think Porsche would have accepted the role unless he knew that if he didn't, he would lose Kinn. Because, as much as Kinn loves Porsche, as much as he wants him and would never hurt him willingly again, as much as he would never choose to leave him, Kinn was raised an heir. Kinn was shaped and molded to take up the mantle of his fathers legacy. Kinn bears the full weight of the responsibility for his family on his shoulders, and he has for the majority of his life, a life that has never completely been his own. Kinn cannot walk away from it, he would never be able to live with himself, he wouldn't be himself, and I think Porsche knows that. Kinn may be soft and loving and affectionate in private, but in public, Kinn is cold, calculated and ambitious-- but there can't be one without the other. Both are what makes Kinn who he is.

So Porsche accepts the ring and the role as head of the minor family because he knows that if he doesn't, he's forcing Kinn to choose between his family and Porsche, between his dark side and his lighter side, and I think Porsche, rightfully, is terrified that he doesn't know what Kinn would ultimately choose.

So the choice ends up being Porsche's, and he chooses Kinn. We know this, because he explicitly rejects the idea of belonging to the second family, emphasizing that it's Kinn's side he's on, demonstrating that his position is entirely contingent on Kinn. He makes the sacrifice of becoming everything he once hated, just so Kinn doesn't have to make an impossible choice.

But how long can that last?

How long will Porsche be able to cheat and lie and extort and murder before it starts to really get to him? How long is he going to be able to act like the tough, unaffected mafia boss when he hates everything he now stands for? How long will it be before he starts to resent Kinn for it? How long before he loses himself?

THAT'S what I think would make for a fascinating season 2: Porsche's descent into darkness, his abandoning of himself, for the sake of the man he loves. Porsche trying to reconcile the things he has to do and the man he has to become, all for the sake of Kinn. And Kinn watching Porsche's joy and brightness and goodness slowly flicker, fade and die, knowing that it's for him. Because of him.

I think there's only one way that it all ends: Kinn has to make a choice. Kinn has to choose. Either he becomes the man his father meant for him to be, following in his footsteps and adopting the mantle of ruthless criminal leader, or he rejects his father, and by proxy his family, and chooses Porsche. The longer Kinn waits to make his decision, the more of Porsche he will lose.

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche meta #JUST SOME RAMBLING AND PONDERING #JUST HAVING FEELINGS #honestly this may just be me projecting my darkfic thoughts #but id love that version of a season 2 #dark and gritty and fucked up and messy #its not lack of love that becomes their challenge its not infidelity or poor communication or any other bullshit trope #its the harsh and cruel reality of the life they live #and the untold toll that it takes

[silenthillbunni]

🌧️🫧💭

#i shouldnt have fav mutuals bc i get sooo sad when they soft block me #which *always* happens like im not joking the day will come when they're just like nahhh bye #🥲🥲 nd i cant help but get sad #nd i dont even agree w that anon who said that 'no wonder everyone blocks u' bc im never mean to anyone #i think it's just bc im fundamentally unlikable and unlovable and the time will come when smth abt me #ticks them off nd nothing abt me is ever tolerated i always have to be perfect for everyone so then i just get cut off like dead weight lmao #also it shows that i get attached so easily but in reality ... ppl are not at all as attached to me 💀💀 #like i care abt them but they dont care abt me nd it makes me feel so stupid #why do i so easily care for ppl?????? why do i have to care nd like ppl when it's always gonna end the same way #me being me is bad nd wrong and nobody could ever truly know me nd still like me #i have to live my life constantly hiding parts of myself and making sure im not too authentic or too open bc then i will make ppl dislike me #it rlly is that. im never mean. i never fight. ppl just see smth abt me nd go 'oh ewwwwww' nd then leave #nd if it hasnt already happened it will at some point nd im constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop #whenever i realize i say or did smth wrong im tense waiting for the moment where they'll leave me will arrive #ok this might sound silly bc i was like 'triggered' by smth small but like #all my life thats just how it's been. im not even mean or cruel. i just exist and ppl dont like me or who i am or what i think #i can never be truly myself anywhere. that is sure to result in being all alone 4ever. but i dont like hiding parts of myself #but i have to. but its hard when im trying to hide nd be lowkey but i still manage to make ppl dislike me T-T #idek what im supposed to do bc i just exist nd im not likable. i try to be that but im still not. idk what to do #anyway.. who cares.. j'appartiens seul #but yeah it is bc it's like this for me all the time nd ig that triggered me lmao #i mean just w my sisters.. their issue is just who i am. my personality. i havent been cruel to them. or bullied them. or put them down #they just get irritated from my personality nd who i am. thats what makes them mad. nd they kinda want me to just stop being me nd idk how #to do that and therefore we arent even talking. havent talked for a year #i wanna cry like????? what am i supposed to do??????? im so extremely fucking horrible that just by exisiting nd not being mean or cruel mak #es me unworthy of everything. idk idk like. omg i feel so stupid for being triggered by that #maybe if i had irl friends and a job and a life i wouldnt care but im a fucking loser failure worthless good for nothing idiot. ofc im this

[craycraybluejay]

Guys pls don't make my post Tumblr famous, I don't think the masses are ready to hear my beliefs on thought crime :/

#i actually discussed my activism and posts w my therapist #and she also thinks yall are stupid and really cruel to people who likely have issues other than the percieved issue of a bad attraction #hell she even has to remind me 'thoughts are thoughts' bc i am a person and i do second guess my feelings #unrelated to attraction feelings to specify #just stuff ab life #they really are aren't they? just thoughts. #i imagined a fucking goliath of an albino snake nearly eating me but i wasnt actually nearly eaten by a snake #i thought of hitting someone who yelled at me but i didnt do that #you know? #it's really strange to have a better grip on reality than 'saner' people #i guess it makes sense though with the experience of hallucination and whatnot #you kind of have to reality check yourself a million times more in a month than an average person's lifetime #if you want to stay on top of the real world #idk i guess its just baffling to me that people with a relatively abled grip on reality seem to opt to ignore it on purpose

[lilaccoffin]

Wishing for a fic where Meryl and Vash talk and Meryl shares this with him and they have a nice heart to heart of sorts

#god help me #they're both such softies who get hit so hard by the cruel realities of life #vashmeryl

[mad--sad--bad]

I only live in nostalgia and scenarios..

#nostalgia #scenarios #don't want the real life #reality is boring #reality is cruel #i need more #i don't belong here #i belong in my dream world #exhausted #bpd #traumatized #mentally ill #can't stand it here #i need this safe space #need my scenarios #i have to lose myself in it #don't want to be human #want to be free

[1introvertedsage]

Man is the cruelest animal. ~Friedrich Nietzsche~

#Friedrich Nietzsche #Friedrich Nietzsche quotes #man #animal #cruelty #reality #quotes #what we are #cruel #humanity #facts of life #greed #lha #1introvertedsage #learning #corporate greed #money #evil #poverty #royalty #see #heal #be love #growth #healing

[johndonneswife]

not a sad ‘woe is me’ post so don’t send me weird messages but: the thing abt cycling through every ED possible and being bulimic for like 10 yrs & making yourself vomit up to 10x times per day on ur worst days is that your teeth and gums will eventually give out on you (bc it doesn’t make a difference if you’ve been good & it doesn’t matter how well you’ve taken care of your teeth for the last x years) and u will be 30 years old crying to your very sweet and kind dentist when she tells you about the 1 million things that are wrong with ur teeth

#anyway i feel strongly compelled to quit my job and dedicate my entire life to speaking out abt eating disorders #& doing research & writing & advocating for people who are suffering #women who are suffering #i think this is honestly my life’s calling!!!! i just don’t know where to start #you know movies glamorize having anorexia & it’s always like: she is the most beautiful girl in the world…but so sad…she doesn’t eat :( #i need to make movies that have scenes like that one chapter of i’m glad my mom died: #where jennette has been throwing up like 15 times a day and her tooth falls out #and she’s literally just like: yeah i’ll deal with that later #& instead of writing about a beautiful skinny white girl who is upset about eating carrots at inpatient #i would just force people to read/watch the things in this thread: #https://www.reddit.com/r/EDAnonymous/s/H1C3JZyvFK #because that’s the reality #the one comment in that thread ‘i ate something poisonous because i hoped it would make me puke’ #like yeah same. LOL. & i always thought i was the only one so fucked in the head #anyway society is very cruel to women and i need to do something about it. genuinely whereeee do i even begin #i guess i have been writing a lot abt my personal experience and all the disgusting things ppl like to avoid talking abt #and how my mother made me this way etc #i could def make a memoir out of it. maybe i’ll do that. #i would love to have more options than just. trauma porn. #ah anyway maybe i’ll open a nonprofit. IDK. i just need to make a lot of noise somehow

[halothenthehorns]

I need to learn how to draw! I was struck with the sudden image of Percy jumping on Ariel's rock with a starfish stuck to the side of his head, his hair a mess, barechested with jeans and throwing his arms up as he tried to reenact Part of Your World for Estelle

#pjo #life is cruel #why don't these awesome ideas ever occur to alternate reality me who's posted this image for me to find #estelle pjo #Percy Jackson #the little mermaid

[sylhea-raemi]

the nero and airi connection is so important it's not just bcs theyre my faves

#sylhea talks maydare #i swear i made a post abt this somewhere but rn im remembering why them meeting and talking was may fav chapter it's so so important #like look theyre both- in a way- 'taken in' by kanon. kanon chose airi to be the saviour while kanon saved nero bcs he's essential #airi got kanon's 'hero' while nero got kanon's 'king'. one of them feared kanon while the other admires him #and yet kanon is their saviour. he took them away from a world that is cruel to them. yet airi and nero have different circumstances #oh my god wait there's more similarities than i thought #both of them were taken just after their important people had died and in a vulnerable state #airi back thwn had a childish (not meant to be /neg) mind while nero in the past was just a child #both are given a responsibility and both accepted them in different ways. while airi was in the delusion she's the 'protagonist' of maydare #nero understood what his purpose and what he's supposed to do. but also both of them wanted something they desire. they wanted 'peace'. #both of them wanted to be in a world where they can live freely. airi wanted to live the most of her delusions while nero wanted to live #the most of his life as a normal student. different but to its core they only wanted peace and be themselves freely. #and in the end both of them understood that they have to act their role in order to achieve that peace in this worl. they know they had to #face forward and fight. #IT'S THIS LONG AND IM NOT EVEN GETTING INTO WHAT MADE ME START THIS 😭 atp their parallels is the main focus here #so all of those and there's more. makia. their connection to makia. #nero is a friend of makia while airi is a friend of kazuha. and the people who knew about makia's past. #i'm guessing nero only knew makia's past life as the scarlet witch and dont know about her other past life #while airi only knew about makia's past as kazuha and didn't know about her being a reincarnation of scarlet witch #nero talking to airi about makia was also very important bcs yes makia already slapped airi into reality and makia was able to do it #bcs not only is she born and raised in maydare she also have memories of the other world. nero who is PURELY from this world and donxt know #about the other world helped airi accept that this IS an actual world. makia ACTUALLY lived in this world and she learned that from nero. #lmao i know that wasnt the intention bcs the intention was nero saying all that so there's proof makia really is the reincarnation of makia #but i'm already this far bro nero who's purely from maydare that came to know of the other world from someone else #and airi who is purely from the other world and isekai'd by someone else to maydare #it's so fascinating #god when this chapter comes to manga im hoping ppl dont immediately ship them #bcs to be honest i dont think airi is interested in men at all and nero is interested in romance in general #plus nero is 16 y/o while airi is 20 y/o so there's that LMAO #it's so insane to me how much damage airi actually had her experiences was actually REALLY traumatic

[quietwingsinthesky]

even deserves gentle forehead kisses

#and so do i but thats another problem #dw oc #thinking about. touch in their original environment is function only. necessity when it happens. #it is not a cruel thing. or not intentionally not by those doing it that even interacts with. because even does not. as a rule. interact #with anyone ‘Important’. #they are all simply following the same patterns they were raised with and have little reason to question because of the intense isolation of #space travel. i think a lot about. the inciting incident of even leaving is Sci-Fi Problems but more specifically. the death of someone #they were both attached to and felt responsible for. their older and previously injured coworker who would not be alive without even lying #about how much work he’s doing that they’re taking care of in reality. (which is a whole other thing. really the first things to know about #even are 1) that they will willingly put themselves in a position that endangers/harms them without hesitation if it means helping. and #2) even is a liar. that is what love does to them. for better and more often for worse. if it hurts — even will lie. #AND ANYWAY WE’RE GETTING OFFTRACK HERE #but the point is that what sticks in my mind that will go into a scene if i ever write anything about this #is that when that person dies. that person who even has built their life around protecting. buying just a little more time. #when the doctor is trying to pull even away because the danger is still present they are not safe it is still a threat. instead even squirms #away from him so that they can take their friends hand and put it on their cheek. and its still warm. #this is the person they were closest to. and this. this simple thing this simple contact. this is not something even has ever felt. #and their hand is growing cold. #anyway moving on from that this is why they should get cuddles #even headbonks the doctor to show affection like a cat pass it on.

[connorconsumestrousers]

just finish moral orel about 20 minutes ago.

yes I know it's. 1am

yes I know I should be sleeping

but I can't. all I can do. is sit here, thinking about that ending.

thinking. about them.

.....

them.

#thoughts #moral orel #past midnight thoughts..... #its. so late. #but. i cannot SLEEP #thinking abt them.... #crying/neg #bawling my eyes clean out of my head. #“i love you” SHUT UP SHUT UP SHut up sh- #ueueuueueueeueue...... #moral orel ruined my fuckinh life /hj #cod why did i watch this show #why did i think itd be anything but a nonescape from a cruel reality I live every day #an unloving father and a sad mother... and an ANNOYING BROTHER.... #at least clay is bbg #thats a huge plus #also.... gay ppl #canonical gay ppl and i love all of them #i love. complicated characters #they make everything better #but uhm. yeah #its almost 2am... #maybe i should. sleep #maybe...

[aysshhh]

I cannot seem to contort myself back into the shape of a dutiful child.

The Cruel Prince, Holly Black (The Folk of the Air)

The moment you break out of the path you've followed since birth, is the day you're actually born. Until you stop letting them decide for you, judge you, mould you, you will never be responsible for your wins or losses. But once you break free, you find that you can never go back. You're not the innocent child they've always viewed you as.

Depending on no one is as liberating as it is difficult. It is difficult to find and create your own paths in this beautiful yet cruel world. At the same time, being able to choose for yourself and finding your niche in this world will be the best thing you'll ever do in your life.

Burn beautifully, you wild heart. ♥️

#quotestoliveby #life quote #holly black #jude #the cruel prince #the folk of the air #fantasy #reality #beautiful world #cruel world

[chipped-chimera]

I'm about to choke my entire country's government with my bare fucking hands.

#kerytalk #auspol #good news! I qualified for medicinal cannabis #bad news - I have to pay out of pocket for it and even though it's discounted through the study it's fucking expensive #thought I should apply for the disability payment since I currently qualify #but the fact is I have no clue if this will improve my condition enough to work a little in the next two years which now disqualifies me #I AM NOT PSYCHIC I DON'T KNOW #also that doesn't change the fact I have to pay #out of pocket #an insane amount for medication to just make my life /liveable/ #ok great if I can work #well what if working is only enough to PAY FOR MY MEDS AND NOT LIVABLE #WHAT FUCKING THEN #I'm sick of being under the boot of everyone else I just want to live my goddamn fucking life #without having to constantly bribe myself to stay alive because that's the reality here #the fact this is all because of damage that has been dealt to me by cruel people over the years fucking kills me inside #this has been a tag rant

[the-kipsabian]

.

#i also feel like a major fucking disappointment to all #i was so happy for like a solid week after the trip and all. even with being ridiculously sick and everything #and now its just. back to this. the usual sadbitch hours #im sorry. i was genuinely enjoying myself for a while but i cant keep up with that when the hype wears off and we're back to the cruel #reality that my life is. and that i am. with being a nonbelonging failure of a being and all #i really need to stop talking now. im sorry im just bringing everything down. i dont like myself either #okay bye #night is an absolute mess on main