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tender-rosiey · 3 years

Note

hey dear (yeah im deffo addicted to your writing) just checking on you i hope your doing good and taking care of yourself. I would also like to drop a one shot request of Chuuya falling for mori's god-daughter (also an executive) who has an ability which allows her to summon and control demons while singing but she ends up getting captured and goes missing for 2 years then one day they find her and he confesses to her after she gets rescued (rlly fluffy). thanks in advance love Safiyah <33

❥—Cassiopeia

❥—Chuuya Nakahara x Reader

❥—Fluff

ᴀ/ɴ: i am glad you enjoy my writing and i hope you are doing great as well; hopefully you like this one too 🥺💘 also let this cure your hearts after the last one- also the chant is inspired by Obey me ❣️

“Chuuya, I would like for you to meet my daughter.”

Right then a beautiful and fair lady came out of the door. Chuuya beweildered by her beauty went silent; such a beautiful creature existed?

“Y/N, meet Chuuya; he is one of the best executives here!” Mori introduced you smiling, to which you wave your hand to the ginger and smiled warmly “Hey Chuuya! Pleasure meeting you.” Chuuya smiled shyly and waved back “S-same here..”

Mori then smirked and questioned “Chuuya what’s the matter? You seem rather uncollected.” The said male waved his hand around in denial as he was stopped by a giggle from the lady beside him. “You are quite cute; I hope we get to know each other more.” You said before exiting for your mission.

Chuuya let out a sigh of relief putting his hands on his knees as blush crept onto his face. He made a total and utter fool out of himself; Isn’t he the strongest executive? Why was he so damn shy around you? The thought started clouding his mind until Mori snapped him out of his daze and asked “Are you perhaps interested in Y/N, Chuuya?”

Damn right he is. You were so sweet and kind and that just hit bullseye in his heart. Ever since then he would take almost any opportunity to be with you and talk with you. You were slowly getting to know each other better.

You have been together through tears and giggles and pain and sniffles. He knows you deeply and you know him just as well. After all 3 years of friendship isn’t a minuscule period of time; there multiple moments he had seen you in that made just how much of a wonderful person you are even clearer.

You got along with everyone.

Akutagawa, you both were like best friends and would tell each other everything. You were one of the few he accepted help or their company and you were always a great duo in battle.

Kouyou, the woman that took him in adores you. What more could he ask for? Kouyou helped you and guided in your times of unknowing what to do and how to do it. You were sisters and she valued you deeply, she would always hang out with you and talk with you about anything and everything.

Mori, the man who you addressed as your father. Despite Mori not being biologically him but he treated you as such, as if you were his daughter. He gave you all his love and made you feel appreciated and took care of you.

Seeing your kindness towards your allies Chuuya was dazzled, how could someone so sweet and kind be in the Mafia? His thoughts were completely erased when he saw you in battle.

Multiple screams, all saying the same thing “Beware of the Port Mafia’s devil!” Chuuya was wondering about who are they referring to, was it him? He suddenly heard someone singing behind him.

“Hear me, denizens of darkness, you who are born of shadow and you who give birth to it. Hear me and do as I command! I, Y/N, call upon you to send forth one of your number! I summon the demons of chanting despair!”

That voice, it sounded so angelic but the words were venomous. He turned around to be met with the sight of you floating, eyes glowing purple as demons from around you rose from the earth and attacked all the men in front of him.

‘Woah..’ He couldn’t be more in love. Your elegant movement while fighting were a sight to behold. Your voice was enchanting yet deadly, he would be grateful if it was the last thing he heard before his death.

He loved how there was a total difference between the way you treat your peers and your enemies. Did he really deserve if your feelings were mutual? It was new for Chuuya to doubt himself. But there wasn’t any route to choose when his heart now belonged to no one but you and that made him helpless before you.

“Look at the stars, Chuuya !” Right, you loved looking at constellations, and he loved how the stars shined and danced in your eyes as if they were their ball room.

He looked up and saw a weird look star, maybe a constellation? He then pointed at it and asked “Y/N, what constellation is that?” You smiled brightly before answering “That’s Cassiopeia! It represents love.” You then turned to the ginger finding him close to you and somehow both of you involuntary moved closer, slowly about to close the gap between you.

“Hello Y/N.” You both jumped and looked at the owner of the voice to see that it’s Mori. Chuuya saying every cuss word in his mind while you both were as red as roses, however Mori was grinning mischievously. It’s nice being a party pooper at times.

However that’s all in the past.

Now you were gone, no one knew where you were taken and if you were even still alive. 2 years too long for the ginger, too long because of his suffering and sadness through them.

When he first found out you were taken he was devastated and went on searching everywhere with the mafia men; everyone in the Port Mafia was searching for their Y/N.

At the night he found out he couldn’t sleep, and wanted to start the search as soon as possible but days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months and then into years. Chuuya was starting to lose hope but still searched. Everyday he thought of you, he would drink wine and anything to wash it all away.

Even now after all what happened and the two years that had passed since then they still didn’t stop searching. He didn’t stop searching.

He was walking down the streets returning back from a mission as he came across a warehouse, it looked rather sketchy so to quiet down his thoughts he entered it and his eyes could not believe what he saw.

You all beaten up and bruised. Body looking as weak as a stick and something to silence your screams and chants on your mouth, his body loved involuntary and hugged you tightly quickly freeing you from the chains that hampered you from fleeing from your misery.

He sent the location to the Port Mafia and now everyone was going to come and make who did this to you pay. He picked you up and as he looked behind him he found Mori with wide eyes barely himself believing that indeed you were alive.

The old man took you from the hands of your savior and inspected your face, those who did this to you will go through hell. “Chuuya take her back.” Mori said sternly and Chuuya nodded, he wasn’t going to let you go out of his sight again.

And there he was with you on a bed, multiple tubes sticking to your skin and a oxygen mask. You looked really weak and pale, but it didn’t stop him from loving you. He loved you even more because you managed to live through that and made it back to him at the end.

Chuuya fell asleep as he was waiting for any sign of your awakening, and you woke up instead adjusting to the light and your surroundings. This wasn’t the dark and frightening warehouse you were in...you were finally saved. After two years of misery you were finally saved.

You looked to your side to find the ginger fast asleep alongside you, you smiled softly and gently played with his hair. Chuuya felt something on his head and slowly woke up to see you pulling your hand away, but he held it tenderly and put it back.

“I have to tell you something when you recover, Y/N.” He said as he was enjoying the feeling of your touch. “Why not now?” You questioned while he looked up at you with a smile and mumbled “because it’s something you need to be told outside of this white chamber.”

And so as time passed you were finally back to how you were. He blindfolded you and led you to a garden and went behind you. “Chuuya where are we?” You wondered while he chuckled and took your blindfold off and said “See for yourself.”

Your eyes were now looking at the garden you last saw Chuuya before your disappearance, but right now there was a picnic set and surrounding it were petals on a shape of a heart and candles lighting up the the space. He then pointed above and looked at you.

There it was, the constellation of love, Cassiopeia. He placed a hand on his heart and softly said “Love is what I feel for you. Very deep and strong love.” He walked towards you and held your hands between his bringing them up to his lips and placed a light kiss to them.

“I never stopped loving you, and from the moment I saw you took my breath away, you made me the prisoner of love and the poor who seeks for your love and touch. Everything about you is beyond description, I can’t find the words to describe it and I am afraid that it had already eaten me up. I am afraid that now you are the only who can calm the beast of love and adoration that only wants you and won’t accept anyone but you. So will you please give me a chance and let me show you how much love my heart feels towards you?”

A smile made its way into your face and vision getting glossy. You pulled the ginger towards you and connected your lips as gentle as one would touch a flower’s petal. The light of the stars shining on both you, it looked like a scene from a movie.

A portray, a beautiful portray, that could be drawn by millions but never be as beautiful. And Cassiopeia was the witness of their true and never ending love.

“once I believed

love poems were foolish

now I read love poems

just for the sake of it

and yet perhaps I want

to reach a higher state of poetry

I don't know if that's right or wrong

but such a feeling persists anyway

and sometimes irritates me

provoking outrageous desires

once I believed

love poems were foolish

yet now I do nothing

but dream about love“

-from “Exhaustion” by Nakahara Chuuya

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

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beneaththemasks · 4 years

Text

Beast, Fifteen, Dead Apple and Fyodor´s ability put togheter

The first time I watched Bungou I didn't pay much attention to be honest and that lead me to committing a big mistake and that big mistake is what brings me here today.

This is a theory I´ve been working on for a long time now.

Before anything else I have to tell you that this is something I came up with entirely by myself, I don´t know if anyone has already written something similar to this, so any similitude is pure coincidence.

DISCLAIMER: this contains spoilers from the manga and light novels and is quite long, so read at your own risk.

Any hateful comment will be simply ignored, this is just something I'm sharing with you because it makes sense to me and I want to know what you think.

Please excuse my english if it gets bad at times since it isn't my first language.

Let´s begin:

I´ll start talking to you about some guy named “Randou” who was presented in the light novel ''Fifteen” as the responsible for the mafia´s predecessor return and the Arahabaki incident.

For those of you who don´t remember him, here´s a picture.

Ok so, you might wonder why I'm bringing him up.

If he was supposed to be a forgettable face from the beginning, another extra character in the story, then why didn´t I forget him? Why do I mention him before anything?

The answer is simple: I can forget a face I´ve seen once or twice but not one I´ve seen thrice.

“What do you mean? we only saw the man one time”

You´re totally right, however that wasn´t the case for me.

Confusing his face was the big mistake I made and the one that lead me to building this net of theories and clues that I'm putting together right here right now:

Even though the first time we see Fyodor´s face is at the ending of the second season and then again in Dead Apple, I remind you that I wasn't paying attention at all (like literally guys I already told you about how I would call tachihara “bad tanizaki” just because they looked the same to me). Due to my lack of attention, after finishing the “cannibalism” arc. and becoming more familiar with Fyodor´s face it occurred to me that he was the same guy involved in the arahabaki incident.

Why? because I can so I did.

My brain automatically assumed these guys were the same person just because they were dressed as if they were going to sleep on the top of the Everest for a whole month and because their faces were equally sad...

Of course, when I finished the anime and started reading the manga I was totally confused when Dazai asked Fyodor what his ability was, since I thought him and Randou were the same person, therefore I thought they shared ability.

After that I had to rewatch the whole anime and then realized how high I was when I watched it the first time.

But even when I managed to get the whole story right I still couldn't stop thinking about Randou, he was still a mystery, but more than the man himself, his story and the order in which they were presented by Kafka were somehow strange.

So after reading “Beast'' I came up with a few theories about the book being canonically in that alternate universe, because for me, even if Beast was supposed to be just a spin off written to promote the release of Dead Apple, it couldn´t be that and only that.

I just can´t accept that “Kafka wrote a 200-page novel to promote a movie that had nothing to do with it when he was asked to just write a 50-page short story” because he just felt like doing it. I knew from the deep bottom of my heart that he was not the kind to write just for fanservice.

So I came up with this idea: “What if the release of Beast and fifteen are more important than we think?”

Despite the first time we see fyodor´s face being at the end of the second season, the first time we see him meeting Dazai, is during dead apple. However, he seems to be just an extra character, someone who doesn't seem to add much to the story at first sight (except for when he turns Shibusawa into a big dragon).

But if we think about it, the same happens with the mentioning of the book in “Beast” and with Randou´s appearance in “Fifteen”.

In these three stories, the book, Randou and Fyodor are like an app running in the background of your cell phone, they are responsible for some kind of event and or incident that we cannot see now but that eventually will go out to light.

These are all very small hints, but that's why it is important, the smaller the better.

We can´t forget that Kafka has always been a mastermind of hiding evidence in plain sight.

He wrote and published 3 stories at the same time that have nothing in common and then used them to promote each other. He decided not to wait any longer nor release them earlier because they´re relevant to each other even when they don't seem to be. They are like a building in the middle of the city, we see it but we never get the chance to observe it because of all that's happening around it.

But as far as we know Randou dies at the end of fifteen. How could he possibly be related to Fyodor if they never met?

The importance here is not his death or them meeting, maybe not even Randou himself but what happened before his entrance to the PM and after his death.

As far as we know, Randou used to be an european spy tasked to investigate a powerful entity of power in japan and sent to steal it. However, during that mission he was betrayed by his friend who tried to kill him but is Randou who ended up killing him instead.

Nevertheless, in the story we never get to know why his friend betrayed him nor what is that so called “source of energy” that the japanese government has been secretly guarding.

never

know

until now (?)

Towards the end:

What if that “source'' is actually the book itself and his friend tried to kill him to keep it for himself and escape with it?

Even more important:

What if Randou, after killing his friend, decides to steal the book but forgets about it and it´s power after losing his memory in the Arahabaki incident?

These explanations can perfectly fill a void we never even noticed was there: Randou dies without remembering that he has a very important item with him, which is the reason for which he was once chased by the GSS (an agrupation that is connected to the Guild who we already know was searching for the book as well) and the same Dazai could have stolen after the Port Mafia kept his belongings when he died.

Please please pleaaaaaaseeee finish the idea.

After writing for 2 days, tying knots and untying them, reading and rereading, remembering details and searching for others i couldn't remember, this is my final conclusion:

Fyodor´s ability could be nothing more and nothing less than the book itself.

The proof of that being:

-All we know is his ability “Crime and Punishment” is presented as a perfect complement to one another. When he explains why Sibusawa´s mist didn't affect him he says “it´s because crime and punishment are good friends” which can mean that for one to appear, the other has to do something, that is to say, he has to commit a crime to receive punishment.

-We can assume that as someone whose objective is to free everyone from the sense of morality (as Gogol explains) he's the one to decide whether he commits a crime that deserves punishment or better said, his ability “the book” that can only function following the rules of karma.

-He probably doesn't need to communicate with the outside at all and is trying to deceive Dazai since the plot is going according to his plans and to how he planned to write the story on that single page.

-We know he has a page since the beginning and he also knows everything that´s written on it (for example that sigma´s existence was written on it 3 years before) but it's never mentioned how he got it.

-He literally joined the Guild to search for that book (´cause it belongs to him).

-Despite everything, Dazai is not worried about his plans either (he says all he has to do is observe him) because he's confident that everything is gonna turn out in his favour (you can see the little bitch didn't mind sending Akutagawa to his own death) since he stole the book from Randou long ago.

-What Dazai could've done with the book is nothing more and nothing less than creating the “Beast” universe after leaving the PM just to give Oda a proper farewell and because since he discovered the real power of that book he decided the best was to hide it.

However none of them can reveal any of this for obvious reasons.

Well I´ve nothing more to say, this is all I have for the moment.

I know some of these ideas sound very complicated and even excessive, however in the end everything fitted perfectly to me (and I swear I came up with 3 different theories before putting this one together).

If you managed to read this far, thank you very much :,)

If you feel like commenting something feel free to do so :)

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #bsd manga #bsd light novel #bsd dead apple #bsd beast #bsd fifteen #dazai osamu #fyodor dostoevsky #asagiri kafka #harukawa 35 #long post #as you can see I have no life and a lot of free time #bsd spoilers

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masked-buffoon · 4 years

Text

Chapter 2: Twisted (Part 1)

Warnings: violence

Author notes: let’s start chapter 2! Do you think there is not enough warnings...? That’s because it’s only the beginning...

My arm was trembling and my vision was blurred, results of my tiring way of life and days spent without being able to sleep while training to become a proper mafioso. Never had I been so exhausted, even when living in the slums. As a consequence, I could barely see the target in front of me, and lamely missed the last bullet of my gun — my last chance to be rewarded by the executive Dazai Osamu. When I heard his footsteps coming toward me, I already knew what would happen, and braced myself for the upcoming pain. As expected, his hand flew fast and hit my cheek without holding back. The strength of the blow made me lose my balance and sent me to the ground like a lifeless chiffon doll. I felt heat coming from my swelling flesh, and rubbed my cheek in a desperate attempt to calm the pain down, my head spinning and making my fatigue much worse. The coldness of my fingers did appease the burning sensation of the bruise, but they soon were not enough anymore. That was the recurrent ending of my training everyday.

"Don't expect to survive if you can't even bear this slap." Dazai-san curtly said, looking down at me "Now, stand up. Quick. And do it again."

The wall was the best support I could find to lean on my trembling legs. How long...? How long could I endure this training without dying...?

When I had arrived in the Port Mafia, after willingly following Dazai-san, that day, I had been given everything. With his playful smile, he had shown me the shabby room I would use as an apartment, saying it was just a temporary situation, and had even bothered taking my measurements to provide me with new clothes. Noting I was hungry, he had offered me a meal, before showing me around the headquarters so I could familiarise with my new surroundings. The first night, he had even offered to cancel my ability, thinking I could perhaps have my first taste of sleep if the thoughts haunting my mind could quieten. He had touched my shoulder, and I had fallen asleep a minute after. He had been nice to me. So nice I had completely dropped my guard and had not predicted the hellish situation I would find myself into the very next day.

"It is simple." Had he declared with a grin "If I consider your training successful, I'll reward you with sleep. But if you disappoint me the slightest... I don't need to tell you about your condition, do I~?"

I had thought, perhaps, that with some training, I could easily shoot an immobile target. I had already killed two people with a gun, and he had told me I had potential. However, his training involved fighting against him, and he was unbeatable. Perhaps with more strength and more rest I could at least throw my fists toward his chest, but in my state, it was pointless. It appeared more like a punishment than a training, and instead of truly focusing on my skills, I would end up suffering from his kicks and strikes endlessly, wishing he would end our session. I thus failed training every day, and had not gotten any sleep since I had entered the organisation. Sometimes, I wondered what utility he could find in mercilessly sending me to the ground. Was there a reason? There had to be, I always convinced myself, without much conviction. I believed he resembled a child cruelly torturing an insect for the sake of playing, except I was the insect and Dazai-san was a child prodigy of the underworld.

An implied rule, a silent precept of the underground organisation was putting any pride aside as soon as one became a member. Mafiosi were dogs serving the interests of the Boss, replaceable pawns he could move on his chessboard and sacrifice any time he saw fit. The only ones worthy of being respected as human beings were the five executives assisting the Boss in his decisions, counselling him, but still obeying his every orders. Their power, in terms of politics, equalled the parliament's; they reigned upon the world of mafias and illicit trading. I had that luck that many newbies did not have, which was working under direct orders of an executive. In that sense, I was not a mafioso, but Dazai-san's protege, a person who had some importance in the organisation, which granted me protection against being used as mere cannon fodder. I had heard he had another protege named Akutagawa, but I had never seen him... Did he suffer as much as I did? Even so, despite fearing him and resenting him for making me suffer so unjustly, I could not help respecting my superior, for it could not be denied that he had both strength and intelligent. He was incredibly manipulative, easily read people's intentions and established strategies which never failed, and that, in a way, forced my admiration for him. I was conflicted. I wanted to hate him, because who would not detest a ruthless man who looked down onto his subordinates' lives? His dearest wish, I had come to understand it, was to die. He was bored of the world, tired of living and absolutely annoyed by human beings, whom he toyed with all too easily. I had already taken part of his torture sessions with prisoners, and had been completely taken aback by his efficiency. He never used any tool, and never dirtied his hands. Instead, his best weapon was his tongue, which he cleverly employed to make his victim confess, in less than ten minutes. Psychological torture... I believed it was worse than physical one.

I was barely stable on my legs, but a powerful kick sent me back toward the wall. This time, I did not have any willpower to stand up anymore. I was exhausted, my whole body hurt, and this headache had come back despite my pain relievers and other pills I took every time to relieve my suffering. It was enough. Why did he not kill me, so we could end this game of torture...?

"There is something I hate." He crushed my shoulder, earning a wince from me "Being wrong. When I foresee one's potential, I like for that person not to disappoint me. You are a letdown, and you frustrate me. I should just send you back to the auctions."

"I... I cannot..." I coughed.

Dazai-san grabbed my collar, pulling me toward him forcefully, and I was obliged to stare at his single, menacing eyes. He was terrifying. My instinct recognised him as a threat, and I yearned to run away from him.

"Stand up. Face me. That target has not suffered a single damage since the beginning of the training, and it has been four damn hours!" He barked aggressively "What are you here for?!"

"I... I..." Tears started swelling in my eyes "Will..."

He dropped me harshly on the ground, sending me his deadliest glare.

"Tomorrow, I will leave for a mission. You'd better improve during this week without me." He threatened, turning around.

"Yes Dazai-sa —"

I was interrupted by a powerful cough. Whatever the cause was, I doubted it came from the training; my executive was rough, but he had never caused any internal haemorrhage — for now. Actually, my cough was different from anything I could have experienced before; it felt as though my lungs were coming out, along with my other organs. And I could not stop. Months spent in the shallows had, without a doubt, altered my health, but... Why did it feel as though my body was rejecting itself...? Why did it feel as though it was casting my life away...? I took a deep breath, trying to calm down and regain composure, but the blood on my palm was enough to alarm me. Why...? I had done a checkup when arriving at the headquarters, and I was not sick...

"Ogawa-kun?" He glanced back at me.

I hid my hand behind my back, raising my eyes at him.

"Yes, Dazai-san...?"

"Nothing. I'll see you in a week." He left.

I sighed, wiping the blood away from my hand with a tissue. I would not want him to take advantage of this new weakness, would I?

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athina39 · 6 years

Text

Dead Apple Movie Report/Summary

as promised, here’s my reaction thread/summary/speculations/theories about the Dead Apple Movie!!! sorry it’s a day late orz

everything under the cut because IT’S LONG. the CR subs comparison is c/o Fayto-san!!!! i watched the movie in SE Asia, so it’s a different company who handled the subtitles/distribution (it’s ODEX).

here goes! (also a warning/enticement: i’m shamelessly biased towards chuuya and soukoku)

Extra Notes:

- we probably got ourselves perma-banned so many places yesterday (the restaurant where we had lunch, the coffeeshop we went to pre-movie, the foodcourt where we had our post-movie drink, the entire mall itself....) because we were..... quite wild haha

- we took up a whole row in the cinema and there was another group that had their own row behind us! they're chuuya fans too, which is always awesome. the girl behind me is educating her new-to-the-fandom friend to ship soukoku "even if dazai is an asshole", which is Big Mood.

- certain someones (lol) cough "walking dead show" whenever soda is onscreen;;;;; if only They Knew that was the actual theme of the show (more on that below)

- our group was the loudest in the squealing/shrieking ahahaha. and aside from the obvious chuuya and soukoku scenes, we were the loudest at: (1) ALL THE GIRLS (each time yosano/agatha/tsujimura/kyouka's mom appeared, there's guaranteed squealing; Kyouka is Best Girl); (2) akutagawa's Dynamic Entry & akutagawa's curl-up lol; (3) that scene in the OP with the pm dazai & ada dazai; (4) the backstab scene; (5) dazai's handcuff escape & pill swallow. we were also fairly loud at some of atsushi's scenes, but it was more out of laughter??? like.... tiger son, you're kinda unintentionally funny/narmy this movie;;;;

- the people behind us each time there's an atsukyou scene: "BUT. SHE'S. 14." / "she's cuuuute" / "but. she's. 14."

- drinking game: drink for (1) each time atsushi yells kyouka's name - you won't make it out alive within the first 30 mins. slightly easier version: drink for (2) each time there's an orphanage flashback. fast-paced version: drink for (3) each time the "CLAWSSSS" was repeated

Movie Itself:

- chuuya's dynamic entry is so cool, pink motorbike included. like 30% of movie budget probably went to the animation of that scene. it's also asdfghk;da that chuuya tooling/destroying buildings is like, part of his theme in this movie. also, it makes me excited to see a pm days!soukoku driving a car to a mission - they both drive like hell lol

- dazai's "hi, chuuya~" haunts me until now, like. stop sounding so sassy and flirty, gdI but then again, dazai's teasing voice when he talks to chuuya the entire time is sassy and flirty so. asdfhgla

- dazai's “It would have been interesting if Chuuya got struck with lightning instead.” made us shriek because pre-movie, we were discussing that the French term for lightning strike, "le coup de foudre" is associated with love at first sight

- dazai complaining that because chuuya arrived 5 mins late, dazai had to get hit 3 times & chuuya just rolling with that = old married couple vibe much;;;;

- on a more serious note - it's very interesting to see this side of chuuya - in his previous appearances, he was the type to immediately blow his fuse whenever dazai says something to infuriate him, but this time, while he still bickers with dazai, there's a serious edge to it? chuuya's about to deal with the cause of death of his sheep fa(r)m, after all.

- (also - wtf was that dude holding a gun to dazai's head doing??? he just allowed dazai, his hostage, to fucking talk in the communicator the entire time???? bro, you ok??? are you sure you're a villain??? it would be funny tho if the 3 smacks that dazai was talking was 1 smack per sentence that he said on the communicator - because he did say 3 hahaha)

- chuuya activating For The Tainted Sorrow wordlessly (come to think of it, he has never said anything to activate For The Tainted Sorrow? like, everyone else says their ability name....) and on a whole building range = fucking lit. i wonder how's the range/control for his ability... because he managed to knock every single one of the mooks (incl the Lightning User) on that building rooftop in like, 3 seconds. and he managed to do it *without* crushing his bike, which is also on the roof, so he's able to do fine-tune who can be affected.

- chuuya so very tsun-tsun and dishonest when he wants to "help"!!! like aside from destroying buildings, being married w/dazai and being beautiful - one of chuuya's themes in the movie is that.... he does things that others tell him to, in two ways. one is if it's an order/job - which he'll only take from his superior/boss. another is if it's a debt he has to repay.

- soukoku then meets shibusawa; dazai says that all the gems that shibu's throwing away are wasted and it would have made for a good gift to women. chuuya asks for shibu to return the sheep fa(r)m, but shibu says that the sheep won't return because they committed the (apple) suicide. (so the sheep are Ability users? at least these six?)

- in the crunchyroll ver, shibu calls chuuya (&dazai?) "boring guests", while in odex ver, he calls them "bored guests"

- upon hearing confirmation that sheep fa(r)m is deader than dead, chuuya activates corruption wordlessly and tells dazai to not stop him. dazai actually acquiesces to that order w/o mouthing off, so it's good to see that he actually acknowledges how important it is for chuuya to avenge the sheep fa(r)m, despite the events in 15...

- building with soukoku&shibu explodes....... and camera pans to dramatically billowing in the wind coat of fyodor as he watches the proceedings, and calls it great entertainment. (so fyodor has already seen corruption at work? hmmmmm)

- re: the ADA briefing re: shibusawa....... like. ranpo-san. if you already knew how everything will happen/end......can you like.......inform the rest of ADA too......

- the fog events where a fog appears then disappears after a *few minutes* leaving behind a corpse of an Ability user started 3 years ago. the info that they have on shibu is that he's 29, he's an ability user, he goes by "collector", and he's the person responsible for the fog events

- also laughing at how... the meeting kunikida & tanizaki went to, to meet with the Special Ops agent... so shady hahaha. though apparently, this is the first time that the "calling card" of a stabbed, juicy apple is left behind.

- tanizaki: "why an apple?" / kunikida: "how should i know?" asd;sfha;ds why is that your main concern tanizaki, there's a dead person there in front of you hahahaha

- (flashback to bar lupin - dazai asking soda if he knows about apple suicides & soda replying that it's cinderella..... and dazai saying that soda is really interesting because of that.....dazai, your definition of interesting.... is if people don't know cultural/literary references? and soda's an aspiring author at this point??? do you sure??? and dazai giving such motives to snow white ahahaha, the definition of overthinking....;;;)

- dazai gets ambushed by ango in front of bar lupin after dazai took the pill (that would supposedly eventually act as an antidote) (like.....how the fuck did dazai end up hiding that pill in his mouth for that long and he kept on talking a lot and it didn't slip or melt wHAT) & ango says that dazai's the one who brought shibu back to yokohama;;; dazai doesn't get captured by ango's team, bec that's when the fog appears

- (atsushi sleeps inside kyouka's closet???? like............why. i thought he had his own dorm room before??? and kyouka's apparently living (in the dorm???) that's quite far away from the agency itself, bec they had to walk a long way to reach the agency?? i was initially thinking it was like, just behind the office or just the next street over hahaha

- ADA budget apparently is spent on high-tech communicators (just use special satellite phones asdj;asd) and fancy gun storage. i'm a bit disappointed that there wasn't a flamethrower. also, the gun that kuni gave atsushi??? had so many fucking bullets.

- ango and his team is able to monitor the fog in yokohama so they're.... not in yokohama? do they have like an airship or something? the fog is apparently able to remove any non-ability users in the vicinity & separate the ability user from his gift. ango reveals that the HQ of the enemies is an abandoned tower called Mukurotoride in the middle of yokohama and i'm just.... did nobody ever think that an abandoned tower in the middle of a busy city isn't damn suspicious???? it's apparently been there for a long time ffs

- (atsushi has this one-track mind that because dazai saved him, then dazai must be good at all costs, which is. i'd love to say it's because he trusts dazai, but it's more like those fanatic belief, really. it would be great if the manga can explore this deeper - because atsushi's hypocrisy is a really interesting facet of his character. atsushi who doesn't even want to point his gun towards the enemy abilities in the beginning and who say that 'even if he's a villain, we don't know the type of person he is...' 'no matter how bad they are, there's no need to kill them', but when akutagawa says that bec dazai is an enemy now, he'll kill him, atsushi reflexively points a gun at aku...)

- ango's subordinates track chuuya (A5158) down and sends him a message to "pay his debt to professor glasses"

- bitch trio scene! shibusawa's theme of boredom bec he's apparently that much of a genius whose intellect can't be surpassed. dazai says that he's just like shibu before, bored beyond belief. when shibu asks dazai how he's surpassed it, dazai claims that he's going to show shibu and that shibu doesn't know what's dazai's true intentions. shibu shoots it down by saying that it's only dazai who thinks he's fushigi mystery. dazai says that shibu needs salvation.... by either an angel or a demon.

- and because call a demon and he'll appear, fyodor appears. who tells the two that they're the only ones who think they're being mysterious because they're pretty easy to read. (shibu then calls fyodor "Majin Fyodor-kun" ahhh). dazai claims that fyodor's the one most likely to betray shibu, which fyodor agrees with. shibu just says that there hasn't been anyone who surpassed his expectations, so he's looking forward to it.

- during the entire bitch trio scene, there's a focus on apples and a certain skull.

- aku telling kyouka that she now has the opportunity to kill him in an ability-less world asdfgh;lasd

- the PM apparently has made an emergency passage specially made to counteract ability user-attacks and can't be penetrated by the fog?? i wonder how they made it?? a nullifying ability from dazai??? hmm

- aku says that the fog is a "dragon's breath" & aku schooling atsushi on information gathering is asdfjg;asd (i wonder who gave the info to aku though....? probs mori haha)

- at this point, i'm gonna jump the explanations and go with - during this entire movie, shibusawa is already dead. he's a walking dead. except for That One Flashback, shibu is dead.

- shibu then welcomes the bitch trio to his collection room, Draconia. which is filled with crystallized abilities. the room has abilities that are bright red and dull red - apparently, all the ability users that is engulfed with the mist will have crystals in the room - once the ability user has been defeated by their ability, the ability will be crystallized and will become a bright red gem inside the collection room. the collected ability can then be taken and used by anyone who's holding the red gem.

- fyodor says that the collection is enough to make a devil jealous, while shibu says that fyodor sold him information about most of the ability users in his collection, which is how he was able to collect them. (remember in the Fyodor v A chapter - fyodor got himself captured so he can steal the notes/docs about Port Mafia members. *more on this below)

- Shibusawa: But how did you gather all that information? Fyodor: Every city is filled with rats. Dazai: Meow.

- that meow also haunts me hahahaha

- shibu then basically says that he's actually just looking for That One Special Ability to make the collection worthy

- akuatsukyou arrive at the end of the passage? but it's foggy, so either the fog is stronger, they're outside of the passage, or aku's lying about the passage being impenetrable by the fog asd;fasd

- Shibusawa: To me, people are nothing but machines of flesh, behaving in identifiable ways. But there is just one person I fail to comprehend. Myself. Dazai: Don't you have any friends? Shibusawa: I don't need friends. I understand everyone's mind, after all. I will surely go to the world beyond, between my lines, past the blank spaces. Dazai: You wouldn't be saying that if you actually had friends.

- this exchange is just so asdfgj'asds like pls you two

- akutagawa summarizes rashomon's ability as.... "to change a cloth to a blade and send it flying towards the enemy". i'm so proud of how aku's able to utilize that ability and create so many things (so demon armor is literally like a suit of blades??? damn son);;; (also, this brings to mind the saying "silk hiding steel" hahaha)

- aku defeating rashomon by slapping it towards the vat of lava..... damn son again;;;; aku going "just as planned", then rashomon apparently survives and aku changes it to "just as i expect from my own ability" ahahahaha.... and aku telling rashomon that he should quiet down and that he belongs in there (in his coat).... ahh bless him

- atsushi shattering the crystal on Byakko by shoving the blade inside its mouth.... is apparently Foreshadowing for something later

- chuuya complaining that he's being expected to go to ango's facility by one phone call.... but chuuya.... you still went..... ;;;;;

Chuuya: You've got some nerve, expecting me to answer your phone call like I'm on your beck and call. Ango: May we have some time alone? This is a government facility. You don't expect to get away doing something like this, do you? (referring to chuuya probs destroying a dozen doors in the process of him reaching ango's office) Chuuya: I'll be the one to decide if I do or not. Not you. Ango: You have a debt to me. Chuuya: No, you have a debt with me. Ango: What are you talking about? Chuuya: Don't act dumb. Do you think I'm stupid? It's about what happened six years ago. Ango: What do you mean? Chuuya: It was the government who sent Shibusawa into the Dragon Head Conflict. It was supposed to end the conflict that had engulfed all of Yokohama. But he never had any intention of maintaining peace. All you did was create more corpses. You sheltered him anyway, because he's a gifted that can help in protecting the nation. That's why, not only did you turn a blind eye to all the corpses he'd produced overseas, you covered it all up. Ango: All for the peace in this nation. Chuuya (grabbing Ango): Watch your mouth, professor glasses. If you hadn't sent him out, all six of my friends would be alive right now. Ango: Will you kill me? I wouldn't mind. I've been prepared ever since I'd decided to ask for your assistance. Chuuya (throwing Ango aside): It's a deal, then. I'll accept your job. And you'll pay with your life.

- back at the creepy beautiful castle:

- fyodor and dazai utter the "keikaku doori" line, which means shit is about to go down - apparently fyozai had made a team-up to sneak into the collection room w/o shibu knowing - dazai reveals that he worked to "guide" shibu in yokohama because shibu is someone that can't be touched because he has the protection of the government... which means that he'll just continue filling up his collection room with ability users and japanese gov't will just turn a blind eye to it, and therefore shibu must be stopped by other means - fyodor says that even w/o dazai meddling with shibu, shibu would create a fog in yokohama. - fyodor takes out 2 abilities. 1st ability can summon all ability users in the area and teleport them to a single place. 2nd can turn the abilities of the gifted who touch it into crystals. (was A a foreshadowing for this all along? A's ability is to change the lifespan of his subordinates to jewels....what is with fyodor and ability users re: gems hahah) - fyodor holds up the 2 gems so that dazai can touch it and nullify it

- (a side note: at this point, here are the characters who've been shown to still retain their abilities: Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor*more on this later; Dazai because his nullification still works; Chuuya, because he still had that glowy red when he dealt with ango and cracked an entire office wall in the process)

- the logic is that, if dazai touches the 2 gem abilities... the crystals will be broken and the abilities will return to their "former state"*** (v important) and the ability to summon all ability users in one place (aka The Fog) will be cancelled and therefore fog will disappear

- fyodor offers the 2nd gem first... dazai touches it.... but instead of the abilities returning to their owners, the abilities escaped from the crystal shells inside the collection room and fused into one

- before dazai can work on dispelling the fog by touching the 1st gem, shibusawa stabs dazai in the back with a fruit knife. shibu says that he expected this, bec nothing surpasses his expectations. dazai just blandly says "i see... so this is where the betrayal happens", bec fyodor had supposedly locked the door to the collection room when they entered it, but woopsie, apparently not, because fyodor values entertainment

- dazai asks shibu what's his next step, but shibu says that his target is dazai anyway, so there's "no next"

- dazai says that he didn't expect a fruit knife to hurt this bad, so there must be poison in it

- shibu tells dazai that he can now taste the death he's longed for dearly

- in CR subs: dazai says: "How could you? This feels great" while in ODEX subs, dazai says: "What have you done? This doesn't feel great at all", which i think makes more sense

- fyodor says that "with the owner dead, the ability leaves him", and dazai "dies" and "no longer human" crystallizes

- (a side note: so it's confirmed that if ability user dies, ability leaves him.... but what happens to it next? is it transferred to a next person? how about its effects? the people that yosano healed... will their effects be gone and therefore the people will regain their wounds??)

- shibu holds NLH in his palms. shibu's very excited to see NLH crystallized because it very blue (as opposed to the red-gem abilities), the blue changes to red, gemblocking him.

- (presumably, NLH activates?? but.... fyodor held the two gems before and they didn't really activate.... but maybe they didn't because they were already active??)

- Fyodor: The merging ability (the 1st gem, aka: The Fog, aka Shibusawa's Ability) and the disabling ability (NLH). With the two contrary abilities becoming one, a singularity is born. Even with Dazai's special ability, what you really desire-- your lost memories-- will never come back.

- fyodor then says that he'll help shibu recover his memories, and slits his throat

- (joint orphanage flashback time!! c/o atsu and shibu as shibu regains his memories! shibu experiments on young atsushi by electrocuting him. shibu says that the president was mistaken about atsushi's ability, implying that atsushi's real ability isn't Beast Underneath the Moonlight. it's apparently a Very Special Ability, but atsushi's not able to use it properly because of his youth/inexperience. shibu says that even he isn't able to pull the ability out and collect it with his fog.

- in CR subs, shibu says that: "It's the only special ability that won the envy of all other gifted." // in ODEX subs, shibu says that: "It's a special ability that can grant the wishes of other ability users"

(a side note - if his real ability is an ability that can grant his wish, it's possible that atsushi probably read a picture book somewhere or got influenced into thinking that Tigers are Bad. his ability goes haywire, bec it was too strong and he was too young to control it, so atsushi's ability has formed into a tiger because atsushi needed something to blame. something beastly. something monstrous. he can't accept that he himself is the one who's hurting others, so he has formed his ability to turn to a tiger. the regeneration, the shounen power ups... they're not very "tiger-like" or it'd make for a very OP tiger, so his ability could be to make his wishes to reality, like "i want to heal!", "i want to be strong!" and the tiger is just the form that atsushi can deal with/can understand. you can even say..... that byakko is his fursona;;;; *gets kicked*)

(more side note: irl!atsushi wrote a story Tiger Poet, which features a man changing to a tiger....that is a poet... so he might have read that story and got an idea re: the tiger. there's a quote there, "We are all the trainers of wild beasts and the beasts in question are our own inner-selves.", which could be atsushi getting the idea of personifying his ability as a tiger so he can "tame it", aka control his ability)

- anyway, young atsushi didn't enjoy the electrocutions, the tiger takes over and claws shibusawa's face off, killing him

- shibu then says that the reason why he targeted atsushi to begin with is because he heard from a Russian named Fyodor that atsushi's ability is special (see the same contrast betw the CR and ODEX subs noted above)

- present time, fyodor then confirms that shibu died at that point. But. upon death, shibusawa apparently inherited a new ability - the ability to split himself (his soul? spirit?) away from his corpse. his body (aka, the skull that's been there the entire time) is the one who remembers death while his mind doesn't remember it and has retreated into a room (the Collection Room) to deal with his Feelings. (so it means that the shibu soukoku faced off in the beginning is walking dead shibu as well, because apparently shibu has gone for the gem collection quest after his death)

- a side note: so Shibusawa's Real/Original Ability is The Fog (1st ability can summon all ability users in the area and teleport them to a single place....and presumably "pull" the ability away from them). after dying, he got the ability to separate his mind from his corpse (redefining mind over matter), presumably given to him by fyodor?. he then gets the ability to turn abilities into crystals, presumably given to him by fyodor too?, then because he's basically a ghost wandering around earth, he tries to find a reason for "existing" to fulfill the void, which leads him to gathering abilities (*more on this later)

- the abilities continue fusing to each other, creating a huge mass. dazai's "dead" body is sucked into that mass.

- fyodor comments that dazia is quite greedy, because even in death, he intends to watch the city fall into destruction. fyodor then says that as congratulation for their anniversary of being friends (LOL; also - they've known each other for a year already? or is fyodor gigglesnorting here and considering that very same day as the start of their friendship?), he'll tell the dead dazai the reason why he managed to keep his ability in the fog.

- a "2nd" fyodor appears, the personification of his ability. he looks exactly like him. they say the "I am crime. I am punishment. Did you know? Crime and punishment are close friends." line ahahaha

- fyodor merges with his ability

- the mass of abilities that sucked dazai in changes for to a dragon

- fyodor reveals that the dragon is the form of the chaos of special abilities. (remember that "original state of abilities" that fyodor said above? apparently, it's a dragon)

- the singularity anomaly readings are over 9000, more than the events 6 years ago (aka, the opening scene). ango checks on chuuya's location to see if he's on his way

Ango: Chuuya-kun... Dazai-kun is almost certainly eliminated by now.Do you understand what that means? (implying that if chuuya ends up using corruption, there's no dazai who'll nullify it, therefore he'll also die) Chuuya: I don't care. Ango: Are you sure? You haven't taken your reward... My life. Chuuya: Don't get cocky, asshole. You were a just lowly infiltrator six years ago. It's not like anyone would have listened to you if you had opposed their plan to use Shibusawa. (Chuuya lowkey implying that he actually doesn't blame Ango all that much, despite all his talk earlier) Chuuya: This is nothing but that idiot's plans. That Dazai is still inside there. No doubt about it. I need to give him a smack, or I'll never get over it. I'm hanging up.

(can i just say.... chuuya.... even though he has no proof of it whatsoever, he believes that dazai's still alive and waiting for him. ango, who can see the readings of the ability users, knows that dazai's dead. but chuuya----he doesn't need that kind of logic. unconditional trust is here, folks. also, the theories about chuuya actually being able to read dazai's plans/motives??? hell yes)

- chuuya's in a plane approaching the castle (so confirmed that ango's office really is floating over yokohama??? or at least not near it?)

Tsujimura: We're approaching the target. Chuuya: You're that chick from way back. Tsujimura: I'm Tsujimura. Are you really going? Chuuya: Yeah. Tsujimura: It's no use. No human can defeat it. That thing is a monster beyond human comprehension. Get overconfident and fight it, and you'll die. (lowkey spoilers about chuuya being beyond human, thanks bones) Chuuya: That's not a reason to chicken out and go home. Do you know when it's all right to chicken out and go home? Tsujimura: I do not. Chuuya (jumping off the plane): There is no such time.

(chuuya's badass way of removing his gloves and jumping off and his hat and coat flying off???? the whole cinema SCREAMED)

- chuuya chants the "grantors of dark disgrace" line and corruption activates

- chuuya lands on a building, breaks it down to chunks and launches them at the dragon (with dazai inside hahaha)

- extended battle scene with chuuya just battling a dragon, which is the force of a fuckton of ability users' abilities combined, and nailing it. like. just. think about it. the dragon is formed by the force of all the abilities. and there's like, more than 128 of them (as per the initial briefing with ADA). chuuya actually defeated the force of that many ability users. fuck.

- chuuya jumps down to a huge-ass building, floats it and uses it to beat up a dragon. a building is being used as a baseball bat to hit a dragon. the sheer scale and ridiculousness of how powerful he is??? amazing.

- chuuya ends up ramming the building to the dragon's mouth. that's how the fight ends. he makes the dragon choke on AN ENTIRE BUILDING.

- chuuya then yells "DAZAIIIIIIIIIIII" as the dragon explodes (while he's still in corruption mode)

- chuuya reaches dazai, who's inside the dragon, and chuuya (still in corruption mode) punches dazai in the face

- the punch is apparently the key needed for dazai to bite down on the pill, releasing the antidote to the poison (if only romeo and juliet knew about this method...)

- dazai lives. chuuya coughs out blood from using corruption for too long.

- they float in the air and dazai. just. softly touches chuuya's cheek, disabling corruption.

Dazai: You believed in me and used Corruption? I'm so touched I could cry. Chuuya: Yeah, I did. I believed in your disgusting craftiness and refusal to die.* Dazai: That was a somewhat violent way of waking Snow White. Chuuya: You're the one who planned it by hiding an antidote in your mouth, knowing I'd punch you.

...JUST.

dazai's voice.

chuuya. admitting that he believes in dazai. in ODEX subs, it was "i believed in the fact that you wouldn't die", which is extra doki in that ----- even though they've said "i'll kill you" to each other so many times (even in the beginning of the movie) and even though chuuya knows about dazai's double suicide longings.... he still believes that dazai wouldn't die.

and just. dazai implying that he's snow white. and chuuya just rolling with it????? dazai implying that chuuya's the prince who woke up snow white. and chuuya just rolling with it????????

this is high-level flirting i CANNOT

and chuuya KNOWING that him being here is part of dazai's plans and him being here anyways knowing that (even though he had mentioned about dazai's plans always toying with him---)--------------- i CANNOT

Chuuya: Let go, asshole. Dazai: (*dazai presses down on chuuya's head to prevent him from moving*) Don't move. The fog hasn't cleared. I don't want to have to protect you from your special ability in this situation. Chuuya: It's still not over? Dazai: No, it's just beginning. Chuuya: Shit. I can't even move a single finger. (Chuuya collapses into Dazai's thigh, his face/chin landing on Dazai's upper right thigh/hip) Dazai: I predicted things this far. But the rest is on them.

and of course. the lap scene. the scene that killed everyone in the cinema. just. there's no words that can bring it justice. the fuwafuwa atmosphere. the shoujo music background during the floating then the lap scene. the sound of dazai's hand patting chuuya's head. the body placements. the camera angles. that pic in the magazine???? oh boy the actual scene, the extended scene is 10000000000x gayer.

just think.

dazai. who shoved atsushi off when he fell on him.

dazai. who had chuuya fall on his crotch and legs and just. let him stay there. like yes, the point is that dazai has to keep on touching chuuya so he can nullify chuuya's ability and therefore not have his powerful ability have a separate form that can fight them. but they didn't have to stay in that position, did they? i mean, chuuya can't move but dazai could have shoved him off, right? he could have touched him using anything else but keeping him between his legs and patting his head/hair right.

.............BUT WAIT.

dazai.

before he "died".

he.

already nullified the ability to form abilities to crystals. the only ability left is shibusawa's fog, which can trap ability users in one place and extract the ability from them (and just that. the abilities shouldn't be trying to hunt down their "owners" anymore, because no more moon crystal power. right???)

so.

dazai........didn't really have to keep touching chuuya then?

.......is that so. huh.

.....i see.

sasuga dazai.

(i mean even that conjecture is incorrect - as in the Fog can also make abilities fight their owners, aside from just extracting them..... did dazai really have to touch chuuya like that????? .....he really did, huh. i see. sasuga dazai)

.........also. the ability, even if given form, only attacks the owner. (except for that lol-worthy case of rashomon and the tiger having different ideas and attacking each other). so if dazai, as he says, really hates chuuya and wants him to die...... he can..... just let the ability kill chuuya, right??? he doesn't *have* to protect chuuya from it, right? his keikaku that will allow him to use the antidote pill is done, right....? ....ah, but he has to protect chuuya... i see.... sasuga dazai) (unless dazai thinks that chuuya's ability would also hunt him down, in which case.......... dazai, you think yourself that important to chuuya that his ability will hunt you too, huh...... i see.... sasuga dazai)

....also.

dazai.

saying that this is within his predictions, while he's holding the collapsed chuuya to his thigh. still with his hands on chuuya's head. dazai....... why are you predicting that chuuya will end up in your lap. more importantly, why does your predictions END once you have chuuya in your lap. you're leaving the akuatsukyou children to fend for themselves and didn't predict the next parts because you got chuuya in your lap already. .....i see. sasuga dazai;;;;

(a sidenote. from above. fyodor sold the port mafia's information re: ability users to shibusawa. the ability users that shibu knows about will be in the collection room, their abilities getting taken from them. chuuya has his ability The Entire Movie. he didn't lose for the tainted sorrow, at all. so.

- chuuya's ability too strong and can't be extracted, just like atsushi - OR chuuya's ability not in port mafia records - OR chuuya's info is there, but incorrect/incomplete - OR chuuya's info is there, fyodor kept chuuya's ability's information and didn't sell it (a good theory for fyoya fans???) - OR collection room can only get abilities from humans?

(signs point to the first one....... but the other options are also hmmmmm)

- fyodor planting a broken crystal of shibusawa's original ability crystal on the skull's head (it looks like a goddamn horn) so that shibu becomes the "point of singularity" in lieu of the dragon bec dragon is dead. fog continues.

- shibusawa realizing that all his plot?? at collecting abilities? is just his way of trying to cope with the fact that his real thirst lies with atsushi. no really. he just really, really, really wants to see atsushi again.

- another sidenote: AGATHA IS A QUEEN. also, we're laughing about how Agatha is in command of EU. (no brexit in BSD world, apparently) (but also crying a bit because..... Verlaine and Rimbaud and the Trancendentals could be part of the clock tower order??? because there's 12 Transcendetals, there's 12 #s in a clock and they're from france, therefore europe, therefore part of EU therefore----)

- THAT FUKUMORI BACK TO BACK SCENE. MOTHER OF FUCK. mori having faith in dazai's keikaku..... but he's wrong.... because dazai's keikaku had already ended a few minutes ago, with chuuya in his lap. (but really. so mori can't 100% predict dazai, apparently. because mori thinks that it's still within dazai's plan, but dazai says it's not anymore, so.) also. mori being able to kill the ability-elise but not doing so because of the power of cute??? wow, just wow.

Mori: Fukuzawa-dono. Fukuzawa: What a coincidence, Mori-sensei. Mori: Are you having a problem? Fukuzawa: I've just had a glimpse of a solution. Mori: Excellent. Is it not at times like these that your daily actions speak? (They attack each other's abilities) Fukuzawa: I thought you only used your scalpel. I'll be careful from now on. Mori: No mercy, even for an endearing girl. The lone swordsman, Silver Wolf. You are indeed full of sin.* (CR: you are indeed guilty; ODEX: you are indeed, full of sin) Fukuzawa: That was nothing but a demon. Elise: Hey, Rintarou! What the heck are you doing, leaving me behind?! Mori: It's the real Elise-chan~ Fukuzawa: I think she's a demon either way.

- the akukyouatsu v shibu fight continues, with shibusawa basically saying, "ATSUSHI THE LIGHT OF MY LIFE" in repeat. the reference re: tiger v dragon is brought up. shibu says that he's not bored anymore bec atsushi's there.

- the tiger and the dragon are enemies. (more on that here: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TigerVersusDragon) apparently, because the dragon represents all the abilities fused together, the tiger is the opposite (......so..... tiger = no abilities? hmmmmm. no wonder fyodor wants him. it's the fulfillment of his goal of a world without abilities, then?). shibu says that atsushi's ability is the opposite of all the abilities, the most special ability of all. atsushi's ability crystallizes, but before shibu can take it, atsushi grabs and says "that's not an ability, that's me!"

- (side note:

- i wasn't expecting that atsushi (whether it's the beast underneath the moonlight or the possibility that his is an ability that takes the form of his desires/wishes) would be the opposite of all the abilities. i would think it's more of dazai's or someone who can erase an ability, but. MC powers? - then again. all of shibusawa's info came from fyodor. so it's also highkey possible that this is all Fake News from fyodor)

Shibusawa: I understand everything, now. Why I'm here, why you appeared before me, and what his words mean... You... You must be the angel who saves me.

- shibu proving dazai right that "an angel" saved him, though technically a "demon" saved him "from death" before too....

- atsushi kills shibu for the second time by crushing his skull

- AGATHA. BEING DISAPPOINTED. THAT YOKOHAMA IS SAVED. because. "The scent of a burning nation goes well with tea." AGATHAAA

- at the end of fighting, chuuya's propped up against the wall of rubble (YOU KNOW THE ONE). his hat apparently landed a few feet away from him. (did dazai drag him there so he can be near his hat? did dazai look for the hat?? did the hat get magically pulled to where chuuya is??).

akutagawa appears.

chuuya asks what the hell is he doing here, then says that the idiot dazai is safe.

akutagawa..... bows to chuuya.

like damn.

akutagawa "DON'T YOU ORDER ME, YOU FOOL" ryuunosuke, bowing down to chuuya. a+++++++++

but then akutagawa starts to leave chuuya behind ahahahaha

and chuuya goes..... what, you're just gonna leave me here when you see i can't walk what. but seriously, his line is: "Oi. Lend me a shoulder."

(so.... dazai and chuuya were together till daybreak, in time for chuuya to wake up, for the spoonDI cover to be shot, for them to have matching bruises on their lips in that photo, huge smiles in their faces, for dazai to change clothes, for chuuya to be unable to walk.......... i don't to say they banged in the rubble, but they totally banged in the rubble.)

- dazai basically saying that, welp i did this keikaku and harmed so many things! - atsushi: but dazai is helping yokohama!!! - Dazai: Do I look like such a good person?

- atsushi.... i want to say it's your trust or that it's your naivete, but...... are you sure you have eyes lol

- dazai reveals that he hopes that shibu managed to fill his boredom and loneliness..... dazai, stop projecting your issues on others. stop helping others with your same issues achieve happiness.... do it to yourself first please.....

- as the ending song plays... we have this scene from ango:

Ango: Given the complexity of the three masterminds' motivations, we still don't have a full picture. Dazai-kun's the same as usual, and demon Fyodor's intentions are impossible to comprehend. But, beyond all the scheming and lying, the incident may fundamentally be very simple. How is a man like Shibusawa, so intelligent that others look like alien creatures to him, to act, to be destroyed, or to be saved? To be one of three aliens in the world, in isolation and loneliness... I can't even imagine it.

.....like, given the movie. it really is a good summary. all these genius aliens.... they actually have such simple thoughts.

- shibu did all of that, but he just really wanted to see atsushi again. - fyodor did all of that, but he just really wanted to be a bitch and have fun. (and maybe kill all ability users eventually) - dazai did all of that, but he just really wanted to try an apple suicide and be saved just like snow white.

.....one of it is not like the others, ahahaha;;;;;;

- chuuya looking beautiful in the ending scene, as he talks with mori

Chuuya: Were you aware of the trick, Boss? (*referring to dazai not really dying? and using that antidote pill?) Mori: Dazai-kun was acting on his own, and I expected he would need your help. As a forerunner. Chuuya: So I was an opening act? Mori: Dazai-kun decides the star. (in ODEX: Dazai-kun was the one who decided on the star.) Chuuya: And what do I get in return? Mori: The return of order in this city. Chuuya: The peace of this city, huh? Mori: Good work. Chuuya: You don't need to thank me. It was your order, so I'm just doing my job.

- asdfgj;asd - mori #1 soukoku shipper confirmed. like. even if he has that much faith in dazai's plans (see above), he also has a lot of belief that dazai's plans will work if chuuya's there to help.

and that "dazai decides the star"/"dazai decided (on you) being the star.... and chuuya....... just rolling with it. he's not ok with simply being an "opening act" ahhaahh. and mori knowing that dazai made the plan with chuuya having the starring role. and chuuya Knowing that too.

and here comes chuuya's concept of "reward" again.... does this boy get paid.......

chuuya's reward being yokohama's peace???? is he really part of the mafia??????????? a pure boy. someone give him the yokohama peace prize.

- second to the last scene is fyodor still creeping on them:

Fyodor: Everything is but entertainment. But in order to end this world, rife with crime and punishment, I really do need that book. The blank novel sleeping in this town.

(so Book's location is confirmed to be in Yokohama at this point)

- final scene with ADA doing business as usual and atsukyou going out for a mission? to buy crepes? to buy chazuke? idk

#dead apple #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs: dead apple #DA Spoilers #soukoku #nakahara chuuya

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pinkgirl94 · 6 years

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Summer Party - Part 2

At the outside of the grand gate of Shibusawa’s house, a young boy stood in front of it while carrying a watermelon he bought from the fruit shop. Droplets of sweat flowed down on his cheeks and neck. His heavy gasping can be heard due to long walking under the scorching sun.

“Finally, we’re here. Come on, guys. We’re already late for the party,” said the boy called his friends to pick up their pace. Two boys finally appeared before him.

“So, this where the party held, huh?” said a red-haired boy. His name is Nakahara Chuya.

“Are you sure Dazai-sensei is in that house?” said another boy whose appearance has a pale complexion named Akutagawa Ryunosuke.

“Yes. You already know that he’s working with a well-known writer as his assistant, Akutagawa. You said that you wanted to desperately to meet him, right?”

“Dazai-sensei is an author that I admire the most. I knew not just being an assistant to Shibusawa-sensei but also working as an editor to publish books. I thought that this my chance to see him and hear his opinion about my work I’ve been doing until now.”

“Then why didn’t you just send it to his publish company?”

“I’d rather give it to him directly than someone else.”

“......huh……” The boy dumbfounded by Akutagawa’s answer.

“Oi, Atsushi! Are you sure that it’s okay for Akutagawa to come here? He’s not his student like you and Dazai’s one who invited me only so that he’s gonna tease me throughout the party in front of everyone.”

“Shibusawa-sensei said that I can invite someone here so I thought of you guys to come along. The more the merrier the party as he said,” said Atsushi with his bright smile.

Atsushi then proceed to press a doorbell and waited for a while until one gate slightly opened. A human head popped out of it. It was Dazai to greet him and others.

“Hah! You guys are finally here. You too as well, Chuya,” said Dazai and showed him his mischievous smile to signal that he was ready to drive him out of his wit. Chuya get pissed because of it.

“You bastard, you better not to do that like last time. I only came here because the kid said that we’re having a watermelon smash. I’ve been wanting to break something for letting my stress out.”

“Hence I bought this big one here so you can enjoy give it a good smash. Anyway, sorry that we’re late, Dazai-sensei. Shibusawa-sensei must be worried a lot.”

“There’s no need to apologize, Atsushi-kun. Come on, we’re going to his garden at the back.”

“Then thanks for letting us in.”

Dazai let Atsushi, Akutagawa and Chuya into Shibusawa’s house and everyone went straight to the garden to meet a teacher. They finally met Shibusawa who was sitting at the veranda while caressing his cat.

“Welcome, everyone. Glad that you made it here.”

“Good day, Shibusawa-sensei. Sorry that we’re late. We’re trying to buy this watermelon but never thought that the shop locates pretty far from here.”

“As long as you and your friends safely come here then it’s fine. That’s a pretty big one you bought.”

“Well, since you said that you invited another friend of yours to come here along with these two as well, so I thought that maybe I bought this size.”

“As thoughtful as always, Atsushi-kun,” praised Shibusawa to Atsushi with his slightly pink blush shown on his both cheeks. Akutagawa walked towards to Dazai for introducing himself.

“Ah, you’re one of Atsushi-kun’s friends, right?”

“My name is Akutagawa Ryunosuke. I am pleased for meeting you in person.” Akutagawa bowed his head in front of his respectful writer.

“I really admire your writing style since your first work published and I would-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down there and we’ll talk about your written work later. There’s also no need for being formal here. Just relax and enjoy the party.”

“......Right.”

As everyone were preparing for the party, a sound of doorbell rang. Dazai went to the front gate to find another man, carried a few books on his hands. His face looked like he did not get enough sleep as his eyebags shown under them. He was wearing his office clothes since he just came from his office.

Fyodor Dostoevsky

“Fyodor, you finally here!”

“Yes, sorry that I’m late. I just hardly search the books that Shibusawa wanted to borrow for his student back then.”

“No need to apology. The party’s just getting started. Come on in.”

“Thank you.”

Two men headed to the party at the garden. It was nothing like the ones that people usually set. In the middle of it, there was a watermelon placed on the ground. Not far from the veranda were a small garden table with its two chairs. On the table, there were a jug of cold water and two glasses to drink. Shibusawa sensed the presence of men from behind and turned his head to see who.

“Fyodor, I’m glad that you made it.”

“Thank you and here are the books that you wanted.” Fyodor lend the books to Shibusawa. The books were all fiction & philosophy novels. Suddenly, Atsushi appeared in front of them out of nowhere while grab a stick and blindfold on his hand.

“What are those? Are they new books? I’ve never seen those titles before,” said Atsushi with his cheerful and enthusiastic voice as if a small child found his new toy and wanting to play.

#nakajima atsushi #akutagawa ryunosuke #nakahara chuuya #dazai osamu #shibusawa tatsuhiko #fyodor dostoevsky #bsd fanfic #my fanfic #bungou stray dogs

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oniusagimaru · 6 years

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[Akutagawa/Atsushi Fanfiction] Collide (7/?)

Title: Collide Pairings: Akutagawa/Atsushi, Akuatsu Author: Oniusagimaru Rating: T Warnings: None Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters Summary: All it takes is one chance meeting and Atsushi’s life slowly becomes tangled up in Akutagawa Ryuunosuke’s. This has to be some kind of cosmic joke. A/N: Two whole chapters of feels...

Atsushi knows he possesses the bad habit of helping others when it was not in his best interest to do so. Even in high school where he knew nothing good would come of helping his fellow classmates, he still did so because sitting around doing nothing was just not in his nature. He once returned a lost pencil case to someone, and was immediately accused of stealing, the person in question slapping him hard enough to make his nose bleed.

Pain was never a deterrent for his actions, so of course he’d treat exhaustion the same way.

The first time Akutagawa invited then uninvited him out at an ungodly hour, Atsushi had nearly missed his morning class, and Kunikida had chewed him out so badly for being late on test day that he ended up feeling very small for the remainder of the class. He at least got a break during Chuuya’s class, because as soon as he walked into the room he noticed the dim lights and his teacher with his head down at his deck, the words ‘review’ written sloppily on the whiteboard behind him. A hungover Chuuya meant a free period, and Atsushi took that time to catch a few winks. He’d been lucky, but that would not always be the case.

It’s another three weeks before he received another one of Akutagawa’s late-night texts, the vibration of his phone jolting him awake around 2 AM. All the text said was ‘park’, and Atsushi groggily hauled himself out of his apartment to meet the other there. As soon as he arrived, he bought the two of them bottled tea for the vending machine before sitting down next to Akutagawa. That time things remained silent, but Atsushi knew he hadn’t been called out there to casual chat up the other. He’d given it a lot of thought since their last meeting, but he could not understand why Akutagawa had contacted him. It wasn’t until he noticed the slight tremble in Akutagawa’s hands during the second night did it finally click.

Something happened, something that he shaken him up enough to seek company to calm his nerves. Atsushi wasn’t there to talk, he was there to be a…silent, emotional pillar of sorts. He wasn’t sure how to take that, especially since it meant Akutagawa had put some level of trust in him. When that happened was a mystery, but then again Atsushi had braved the late-night hour out of pure concern so clearly their relationship had evolved further without him realizing it. How had he missed something to big? When he things become…somewhat comfortable between them?

Before leaving, Akutagawa opened his mouth a few times, but simply closed it before turning on his heel. Atsushi waiting until he couldn’t see his back anymore before heading back, and plopped face first into his futon as soon as he arrived. As soon as he woke up, things started to go downhill. Atsushi battled a splitting headache throughout most of the morning, and by the time it subsided that afternoon it felt as if his head had been placed in a fish bowl. He could barely focus during his classes, and at one point he had to put his head down to gather himself. His behavior was apparently bad enough that Akutagawa took notice of it, and the firm grip on his bicep followed by a low, slightly annoyed ‘are you…all right?’ had startled him.

He simply bushed him off, telling Akutagawa that he was fine despite how off he felt. Another bad habit Atsushi possessed was his desire to not make people worry about him, so he’d downplay his own issues in order to put others at ease. The last thing he wanted was to bother someone with his problems, and the poorly hidden concern on Akutagawa’s face had made his stomach twist uncomfortably for just that reason. He was given a hard look before the other slowly began to release him, but Atsushi couldn’t help but notice that he didn’t look totally convinced.

They parted ways, and Atsushi had only meant to take a short nap once he returned home. When he was awakened by sun’s rays shining through his window, Atsushi panicked. It was already morning…he’d slept through not only the afternoon but the night as well. His first concern was checking on Kyouka in order to ease her concerns, because how could she not be when her brother had spent so much time in bed? Atsushi only made it a few steps before he blacked out. He vaguely recalled the sound of people talking, the smell of something cooking, and the feel of wetness against his forehead. But more than anything, he could recall a cool, thin hand touching his face, and it felt far too large to belong to his sister.

Once he finally came to, Atsushi groaned as the full weight of his illness hit him. His entire body ached, and whenever he moved the dull throb in the back of his head would intensify. Despite having been out for an undisclosed amount of time he felt exhausted, but his headache made it hard for him to fall back asleep. When he heard the door to his room open, he’d expect to see Kyouka trying her best to not let the concern she feels show. He did not expect Akutagawa to walk in, a look of surprise on his face that quickly turned into a frown. Atsushi stared dumbly as the other looked away, and after a few seconds of silence he begins to explain the situation.

Kyouka had frantically called Gin and told her the situation, and Gin had (in his words) dragged him along to see if they could do anything. His temperature was taken once they got him back on his futon, and even though he had a fever, it wasn’t high enough that the paramedics needed to be called. So, they took it upon themselves to take care of him; Gin and Kyouka made sure the washcloth on his forehead remained damp to help bring his fever down, and Akutagawa spent his time in the kitchen cooking. After a while the girls left to pick up some cold medicine from the store, which meant Akutagawa had to watch him until they returned.

It took him a few seconds to process all of Akutagawa’s words, and once he had, a wave of intense guilt slammed into him like a sledgehammer. He’d not only made Kyouka miss school but had disturbed the Akutagawa siblings from their normal routine, and that did not sit right with him in the slightest. Atsushi knew they had done it out of concern, but that did not stop him from apologizing. In fact, whenever he got the chance he apologized for inconveniencing Akutagawa, because he knew the other had better things to do than look after him. He felt even worse when Akutagawa hissed out a ‘shut up’ before he could get another apology out, his glare harsh but not undeserving since it dawned on Atsushi that he was probably annoying him with his words. He almost apologized for apologizing so much.

Sucking in a deep breath, one that caused him to cough into his hand, Akutagawa told him point blank that he wasn’t there out of pity…he was there because he felt responsible. His confession left Atsushi in a state of shock. Why in the world would he feel responsible for him getting sick? It wasn’t like Akutagawa was sick himself and had infected him, so he was at a loss as to why he believed the burden fell on his shoulders. And then he said it…his voice was barely above a whisper, so Atsushi almost missed it.

‘You should’ve ignored my text and gotten some sleep dumbass…’

He stared, because not only had Akutagawa brought up the texts, something they hadn’t even had a proper conversation about, but he blamed himself for the exhaustion that had potentially let to Atsushi’s sickness. He didn’t know what to say, but when Akutagawa began to mutter that he’d no longer send him those kinds of text, Atsushi shouted ‘NO’ before the other could finish. His head throbbed from how quickly he sat up, but he ignored it for the most part because he was not going to have Akutagawa thinking he shouldn’t confide in him anymore.

Akutagawa had trusted him, allowed him a glimpse of his vulnerable side, and Atsushi was not going to take that for granted. He told the other that they’d figure something out, and all the while Akutagawa gaped at him like he had suddenly sprouted an extra appendage. Even Atsushi had been surprised at his own forwardness, so much so that his cheeks began to burn with embarrassment as Akutagawa continued to stare. After a while Akutagawa muttered a ‘whatever’ before leaving his room, but Atsushi did not miss the way his eyes quickly flashed with an emotion he couldn’t quite decipher.

For three days the Akutagawa siblings came over to help Kyouka take care of him, and he hadn’t been shocked when Gin told him her brother had taken it upon himself to handled most of the tasks. It was during those days that he learned that Akutagawa could cook rather well, and even if it was simply dishes, they still tasted better than anything Atsushi could make. He’d asked the other if he could make him chazuke once, and Akutagawa had wrinkled his nose, saying that it was a ‘terrible waste of tea’.

Despite complaining the entire time, he still made the dish for him, much to Atsushi’s surprise.

He even made an extra copy of the notes he’d taken his class for him, and Atsushi’s eyebrow had quirked in curiosity since the other had also handed over notes for classes the two of them didn’t share. He pitied the poor soul Akutagawa had approached for those. Atsushi couldn’t help but tease him a little, and every word earned him a scowl that held more annoyance than danger behind it. But it isn’t until he jokingly calls Akutagawa a ‘diligent friend’ that he shuts his mouth, and the air around them quickly became awkward.

Atsushi had hesitated to label the relationship they had, and Akutagawa hadn’t voiced any concerns about naming it either. Just being seen as the guy that’d been paired up with Akutagawa for an unfortunate assignment Dazai had pushed on them was originally enough Atsushi; however, the more time he spent around the other, the more his ‘for the paper’ mentality began to sound like an excuse.

His slip had accidentally put it out there that he could and did see the two of them as something other than an unclassifiable thing, and there was no taking back such a significant revelation. So, Atsushi began to babble, asking if Akutagawa was okay with being called his ‘friend’. After a long pause, Akutagawa told him that he didn’t care, his gaze falling everywhere but on Atsushi. A warm feeling blossomed in his chest, and he couldn’t contain the goofy, lopsided smile that had formed on his lips.

Once he’d gotten better, he and Akutagawa fell back into their usual routine, though with the added title of ‘friends’ hanging over their heads. Every time Atsushi thought about it, the more surreal it felt. Had anyone told him months ago that he’d end up friends with Akutagawa, he would’ve laughed at the sheer absurdity of such a statement. But…the world had a strange way of working, and Atsushi was just happy that for once it wasn’t working against him.

Yawning out loud, Atsushi buries his hands a little deeper into his coat pockets as he makes his way to Akutagawa’s apartment. The seasons were changing, and it became apparent with each day as the temperature began to drop. He’s never been the biggest fan of the cold, which is another reason he’s happy Akutagawa has taken to calling him when he needed some emotional support instead of inviting to the park. Atsushi usually did most of the talking, but sometimes they’d remain silent and he’d only head off to sleep once Akutagawa ended the call.

It’s fortunate Akutagawa had texted him to come over; one of his co-workers had come back from visiting family in Hokkaido and had been kind enough to gift everyone an assortment of loose teas. He figured Akutagawa might like a couple, and maybe he could learn how to make a decent cup of tea since the other always complains whenever he attempts to make any. One of the teas also helps soothe irritated lungs, because recently he’s noticed that Akutagawa has been coughing a bit more.

Now that Atsushi thinks about it, he’s been a little out of it as of late.

He frowns at the thought of Akutagawa catching a cold, especially since the other didn’t always look like he was in the best of health. Of course, he’d help Gin take care of him or at least come to check on him like they had done for him. Shaking his head, Atsushi knows he’s thinking too hard about this. He’ll deal with the problem once it appears, but this afternoon is about making tea with Akutagawa. Well…attempt to make tea, since he has a feeling the other will bark orders at him then push him aside to he can do everything.

Once he reaches the right door, he knocks three times, a smile tugging at his lips as he hears Rashomon ‘boof’ from the other side. He can just see the little dog standing firm in front of the door until someone answered it, and even if the small dog isn’t the most intimidating thing in the world, Atsushi finds his protectiveness enduring. He hears feet against the floor on the other side, and once the door is flung over, he’s met with a scowl.

“I told you the door would be open,” Akutagawa says as he crosses his arms.

“And I texted you back saying it feels weird just walking into your place since I don’t live here,” Atsushi says with a huff. “Also, hi.”

With an eye roll, Akutagawa moves to the side to allow him access to the apartment. Slipping inside, Atsushi begins to remove his shoes and jacket, and he can’t help but spare a glance at Rashomon. The dog gives him a ‘oh it’s just you’ kind of look before retreating to his bed next to the couch, and Atsushi can’t help but giggle a little once he notices Rashomon nuzzle the chew toy he’d gotten him a week ago.

“I’m beginning to think you only come over here to suck up to my dog,” Akutagawa says as he closes the door.

“That’s not true, I like hanging out with Gin too,” Atsushi says, and the other gives him a warning look.

He doesn’t know why though; he has very little interest in his sister outside of friendship, and she has, on more than one occasion, proudly announced that she has zero interest in men. ‘I hope I get a cute girlfriend’ is her motto. So, he brushes off the look in favor of reaching into his bag, his fingers grasping one of the small canisters inside.

“A co-worker brought everyone back tea from Hokkaido, how about we make some?” he asks while holding the canister up.

“…I’ll make the tea.”

“Since you hate the way I make tea so much, why not give me a few pointers?”

It takes all of Atsushi’s willpower to choke back the words ‘since you’re such a tea snob’, knowing his pettiness (even if playful) will get him nowhere. After giving him an annoyed look for a few seconds, Akutagawa groans before heading to the kitchen. Atsushi follows close behind him, knowing that’s as much as a confirmation as he’s going to get. He watches as the other swiftly collects an electric kettle, two round infusers, and mugs.

“What kind of tea is it?” Akutagawa mutters while holding the kettle under the sink faucet, filling it.

“Herbal.”

Akutagawa hums as he places the kettle down.

“Each tea has a different water temperature and steep time…do you even know that much?” Akutagawa glances at him from over his shoulder, brow cocked in that condescending way that Atsushi can’t help but make a face at.

“Yeah, I do,” He shoots back.

“…Do you let the green tea for your chazuke steep for more or less than three minutes…?”

Atsushi refuses to answer that question…because he’s gone well past three minutes when steeping his tea. Hell, sometimes a good ten minutes goes by once he remembered he had tea to attend to. A victorious smirk forms on Akutagawa’s lips, and this time Atsushi does call him a tea snob under his breath because he’s a sore loser. Instead of saying anything, Akutagawa sets the temperature for the kettle and they begin their wait.

Atsushi takes out his phone, figuring that by the time he played one song, the water would be done. He could feel Akutagawa staring, but he doesn’t allow his gaze to distract him since it’s the first time he’s playing on a higher difficulty than normal since there’s an event going on. Akutagawa had previously stressed that events were important, especially since it’s sometimes the only way to get certain rare items and idols, which is something Atsushi is always in need of. He hasn’t gotten good enough to reap all the rewards said events have to offer since he usually ranks extremely low, but he does try his best at them regardless.

He is, however, always surprised to see that Gin usually ranks somewhere in the top 100, while her brother always manages to take a spot in the top 50…That kind of skill level seems beyond him.

“…So, you can play on lunatic difficulty now?” he hears Akutagawa says just as the song ends.

“Just for events and certain songs, but as you can see I can barely manage to clear the live,” Atsushi says with a sigh as he stares at the results on his screen.

“No, it’s…” he looks away for a second while leaning back against the counter, “you’ve gotten better.”

Slowly he looks away from his phone, his eyes meeting the other’s profile. Atsushi briefly wonders if he’s hearing things, because that…sounds almost like a compliment. No, that definitely sounds like a compliment. He’s not sure what to say since ‘Akutagawa Ryuunosuke’ and ‘positivity’ are two things he never thought could go together. He stares dumbly for a moment, a smile gradually creeping across his features as he shuffles awkwardly from one foot to the other. It’s such a small bit of praise, but he knows it’s a big deal for the other to say something like that, so he takes it heart.

He begins to say thanks but stops once Akutagawa brings his hand up to his mouth, a cough escaping him. The first couple seem fairly harmless, and Atsushi asks if he should get him some water. But the next bout is harsh enough that Akutagawa jerks forward, his eyes tightly shut as his body shakes. Dropping his phone, Atsushi grabs Akutagawa’s shoulders as he doubles over, and brings him down as gently as he can to his knees.

“A-Are you okay? L-Let me get Gin-”

“S-She’s…not here…” he rasps out in-between coughs.

Shit, right…he hadn’t seen her shoes near the front when he came in. Akutagawa removes his hand to seemingly catch his breath, but before he brought it back as another fit seized him, Atsushi could clearly see specks of blood peppering his palm. Panic starts to set in as Atsushi grips his shoulders tighter; his mind swirls with thoughts of what he should do, but the sight of Akutagawa violently coughing, body trembling from the intensity of each cough, paralyzes him with fear.

He only snaps out of it upon hearing tiny paws shuffling against the floor, and he immediately snaps his head in the direction it came from. Rashomon paces back and forth while whining a short distance from them, clearly distressed by what’s going on. And then his senses finally get slapped back into him…he’s the only one in the apartment that can do something. If he wants to help Akutagawa, he needs to get himself together now. Taking a deep breath, he tries to calm his nerves as best he can, though he does flinch at a particularly nasty sounding cough Akutagawa gives off.

“Okay, I-I’m…” Atsushi clears his throat in an attempt to sound less shaky, “going to call someone, probably the paramedics, then Gin. J-Just hold on-”

“D-Don’t…”

“What? No, you’ll be all right, just let me- “

“N-No…”

“Akutagawa-”

“Atsushi…”

He shuts his mouth quickly.

Even if his voice is gravelly from all the coughing, there’s no mistaking what Akutagawa said. For as long as they’ve known each other, Akutagawa has never referred to him as anything other than ‘you’, and on some occasions ‘Nakajima’. He never thought it’d get any deeper than that, and Atsushi had been content with that. So, to hear him say his given name, voice full of desperation as he gives him a pained look, Atsushi can’t help but feel taken aback. The resolve he’s built up begins to crumble, because if he’s distressed enough to resort to calling him Atsushi, then Akutagawa’s clearly serious about him not calling anyone.

Akutagawa rasps out that ‘it’ll pass’ before covering his mouth again, and Atsushi clenches his jaw at his words. In the back of his mind a voice is screaming at him to do something, to not just sit there and allow the other to suffer. But if this is something Akutagawa is familiar with because it’s happened before, then…Atsushi should trust that the other knows what he’s talking about. With a frustrated groan, Atsushi sits back, his hands balling into fists on his lap. The coughing fit goes on for almost another minute, and all the while Atsushi is on edge.

Once he presses his forehead against the floor, breath coming out in ragged pants, Atsushi takes this as a hint that it’s over. Hesitantly, he reaches over and places a hand on Akutagawa’s back, the other’s body tensing for a second before it began to relax. Despite his body still shaking, Akutagawa tries to raise to his feet, and Atsushi is quick to help him. He sways a bit but manages to lean against the counter so he can rinse his hands off in the sink, and once he’s done he instructs Atsushi to help him to the couch. With a nod he takes the other’s shoulders again, and the two of them slowly make their way over, Rashomon following right behind them.

Atsushi seats himself next to Akutagawa once he gets him situated on the couch, and he opens his mouth a few times before deciding it’s probably best to not speak. Akutagawa’s voice already sounds shot, so asking him anything would right now would probably just strain his throat further. The silence the fills the air is thick, reminding him somewhat of the first time Akutagawa had invited him to the park. Atsushi knows it’s because Akutagawa is feeling vulnerable, and he completely understands why. He looks so…fragile, and even if Atsushi has come to know him as more than just an intimidating figure, seeing him like this is jarring.

“…I’ve never been in the best of heath,” Akutagawa says, his hand coming to run through his dark locks. “My lungs get irritated easily, so this happens sometimes…the weather changing isn’t helping at all.”

“I see...” Atsushi says, voice small.

“It’s been a while since I’ve had an attack that bad…though in high school it was much worse. Participating in gym usually landed me in the nurse’s office…”

Slumping forward, Akutagawa places his elbows on his knees, and Atsushi can’t see his expression from the way his hair covers his face.

“It was so…frustrating…” he says, and Atsushi feels his chest tighten.

He can only imagine the anguish Akutagawa is feeling right now; he’s someone that doesn’t like to show weakness, so to have his own body betray him, showing everyone just how weak he was…it must’ve eaten him up inside. Just like before, Atsushi hesitantly reaches over for him, his hand gently gripping Akutagawa’s upper arm. They stay like that for a little while before Atsushi realizes there’s something he can do to help, and he quietly slips off the couch and heads back to the kitchen. Since Akutagawa’s lesson was cut short, he still doesn’t know how to brew a proper cup of tea, but he doesn’t have time to dwell on that.

Taking a sip of the finished product, Atsushi wrinkles his nose at how bitter it is, and he’s not sure if it’s because he over-brewed it or because that’s what the tea actually tastes like. At this point a gross, bitter, hot cup of tea is better than nothing. Knowing full well that Akutagawa is going to complain about it, he reluctantly brings the cup back to the living room. He presents the cup to the other, who simply stares at it like he’s showing him something otherworldly.

“Here, apparently it’s good for coughs and your respiratory system,” he says, and he tenses as thin fingers take the mug from him.

All it takes is one sip, and Akutagawa pulls the cup away from his lips to scowl at him.

“I know, I know it sucks, I know I can’t make a cup of tea to save my life, but…I also know you’re probably in a lot of pain right now, and since you didn’t want me calling for help this is the best I can do without feeling utterly useless to you. So, please…drink the tea.”

Atsushi’s words are a frantic, jumbled mess, but now of all times he doesn’t want to deal with the other’s snobbish behavior. Akutagawa gives him a look of surprise, and he averts his gaze to the side as he clenches his jaw. Instead of saying anything, he brings the cup back to his mouth to take a small sip. Atsushi lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in, and he watches as Akutagawa slowly drinks his tea. The mug is handed back to once it’s empty, and Atsushi mutters a ‘thank you’ before taking it back to the kitchen. He seats himself next to Akutagawa again, and this time the silence that falls over them is comfortable.

“…Here,” Akutagawa mutters, and Atsushi notes that his voice sounds a lot better.

He watches as the other slips a hand into his left pant pocket, and once he removes it, Akutagawa extends his closed fist towards Atsushi. Tilting his head to the side, his brown quirks in curiosity as he brings his own hand out to receive whatever is being given to him. Something drops into his palm, and Atsushi brings it back to he can inspect it more closely. It’s a charm, and dangling on the end of the thin black strap is a small disk with a chibi illustration of one of the idols he likes. Akutagawa says he won it from a capsule machine near his job, adding that giving it to him is a better option than letting it collect dust somewhere since she isn’t one of his favorites.

Atsushi looks between the charm and Akutagawa, and he can hardly stop himself from practically beaming. He’d been given a gift by Akutagawa Ryuunosuke…his friend. It’s hard to describe what he’s feeling, but Atsushi knows the warmness that surges through his body means something good. He’s quick to reel himself in before he says something that could ruin the mood, so he thinks of a better way to deliver the words that are on the tip of his tongue. Of course, he wants to say thank you, but there’s something else he wants to add, something that might be considered overstepping.

“You, um…called me Atsushi earlier,” he says, and he can see Akutagawa’s body go stiff.

“You must have misheard me-”

“It’s okay, I don’t mind if you call me that,” Atsushi quickly interrupts, “so, u-um…is it all right if I call you Ryuu…?”

It goes quiet just as he expects, but he’s more than willing to give Akutagawa all the time he needs to think this over. He’d pretty much dropped a bombshell on him after all, and Atsushi nervously fiddles with the charm in his hand as he waits. He’s already decided that whatever decision Akutagawa makes he’ll respect, though this resolve does nothing to calm his nerves.

“…Fine…” Akutagawa say, eyes seemingly falling on everything but Atsushi.

“R-Really?”

“Yes…”

“Thank you so much! And thank you for the charm,” he feels a blush begin to creep across his face, “R-Ryuu.”

It’s hard to miss the deep red that spread across Akutagawa’s cheeks, extending all the way to the tips of his ears.

#fanfiction #akuatsu #Akutagawa Ryuunosuke #Nakajima Atsushi #Akutagawa/Atsushi

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