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Season 1, Episode 9 (Bonus Episode)

Julian: Hello, you guys, hello, hello, hello, hello! I just wanted to say, first of all, it’s so nice to be able to just talk to you now. Thank you so much for all of the incredibly kind and-and wonderful things that so many of you wrote along with your questions.

Okay, so now I’m gonna answer some questions! Some of the questions were too good, which means that, um… well… they’re things that are gonna be revealed and I don’t want to give away anything that’s gonna be revealed. I’m just gonna talk about things that won’t ruin anything if I talk about ‘em.

Um… the question that a lot of people asked was “What are some inspirations for the Orbiting Human Circus?” Um, things that I’d heard or listened to and, um, probably the biggest inspiration for me about what you can do with, uh, recorded sound and what that can be actually were these letters that my grandmother used to send me on cassette. She used to make these, uh, recordings on tape, she was kind of obsessed with tapes, and she made all these recordings on tape. She was… she was a really, really magical woman.

She lived in this crazy, rambling house out at the border of Queens in New York, and this place called Newhide Park, and, uh, it was just full of all these old things from a world that didn’t exist anymore, I mean, except in her house, and that I got to play with and be around, and there were all these buckets of rainwater everywhere, she collected rainwater, and I used to get to, I just have all these memories of playing with rainwater and she used it for all these different things and, uh, she was… just an incredibly creative, original, very free-spirited person and, um, her sisters were blind, um, and so I don’t know if this is where it started but she always did letters, her letters were cassettes and she would send me these tapes and it would be my favorite thing in the world when they would come, and I would put it on and it would be my grandmother’s voice and she’d be answering questions that I’d asked her in the last tape that I’d sent her – we’d send tapes back and forth.

I’d record in my tape recorder talking to her and she’d record in her tape recorder talking to me, and so, much like this, she’d be answering questions and she’d stop and she’d listen to my tape and listen to more questions and then tell me the answers to those questions and then, um, she would record things – she would just go places! Like, if she was going out somewhere, she’d bring the tape recorder with her and she’d just hit record and she would carry it around and she’d just record what was happening, not even narrating it or anything, like the tape recorder would just be going for twenty minutes, it would be sometimes a whole side of a cassette, and uh… and it was just, you’d be in this environment with her, and so I’d listen to all the sounds and I’d imagine all the things that were happening in the places that she were—was, and I would disappear into them.

I loved her very much, and I’m gonna try to make this recording for you guys, um… much in the spirit of those recordings that she made for me, so… that’s what we’re gonna do, and, uh… alright, I’m gonna answer another question, hang on.

So, um, one question was about the polar bear, and what became of the polar bear, and, um… the answer is that the polar bear was never found, actually, it disappeared. There were millions and millions of theories but nobody could figure out what happened to it and, um, it very quickly became a, uh, kind of a folk legend that parents would tell their kids to get them to, you know, come in before it was dark out. They’d tell ‘em that the polar bear was gonna get them, and, uh…

But, um, I wanted to strongly encourage everybody not to judge the polar bear. Everything that happened was just not its fault, so I want… I ask if you can, please keep an open mind towards it.

Also on the subject of polar bears, another question was “What is Julian’s connection to polar bears?” Um, and that’s a question I’d like to answer, and as is actually the case with a few of these questions, I’m not sure whether the Julian referred to is Julian the janitor or the particular Julian who’s talking to you right now, but actually the answer is exactly the same which is that the polar bears, the connection to polar bears comes from our great-grandfather.

Another question that somebody asked that’s good, I think – my favorite things about the world are things that are sort of the meeting place between the imaginary and the real, um… Like the Great Recitating Platypus, the Great Recitating Platypus is one of those stories that parents tell their kids, um, and it’s passed down from generation to generation and the story is something that the parents know is really a dream, it’s like, you know, if your child is sick, the idea is if they’re good, then the platypus will come when they’re asleep and will recite these poems while they’re sleeping, and then they’ll wake up, the kids will wake up healthy, and by the parent lovingly telling their kid that story, they’re sort of creating the perfect circumstances for the kid to have that dream and, you know, if the kid does have that dream, like many things in life, it’s very likely that while the dream is an imaginary thing, they will feel better, and, um…

And of course, if they wake up and a bit of the dream lingers, as a cannon does and they see the platypus and they make a wish, um, you know, anyone… I think we’ve all been, if we’ve been alive for a while, we definitely have seen pretty irrefutable proof that if somebody believes that something they’ve wished for is gonna happen, it’s much much more likely to happen than in any other circumstance, and, um, you know, for the kids it can become—it can be real, the way that imaginary things for kids can be real, which is, I think, to say that there isn’t really a wall yet, that they don’t need necessarily a wall between what is quote unquote real and what is not real, because I think for a kid the functionality of imaginary things is just so clear and present, it doesn’t need to be delineated or separated out, um…

But to me, I feel like so many of the most important things in the world and in this universe are in the realm of what you’d call “imaginary”, you know, like the parents lovingly telling kids a story like the Great Recitating Platypus or Santa Claus or anything, is an act of love and, you know, that love is not material, um… there aren’t any, you know, material representations of love, there’s just, um, material expressions of love and, uh, I don’t think there’s anything in the world more important to those parents or to those kids or anybody, you know, than love, and…

And so, I think so much of the substance of life actually is, um, what you would describe as imaginary and only really a part of the substance of life is real, what you’d call real, and yes!

Um, one big question that got asked that I think is pretty neat is, uh, were there things that were in season one or in episodes that didn’t make the cut for different reasons, and the answer to that question is yes, there’s a lot of things, um, and uh, and several people have asked if I could, if those things existed, if I could tell you about some of them, so I thought that would be kind of fun, um, and one that I really like that the janitor told, um, was actually about, I think this is gonna possibly scandalize some people, uh, but it is in universe, so I think it’s okay, but anyway…

One thing the janitor told about was, uh, these visits of, um, a special friend of John Cameron’s to the set of the Orbiting Human Circus, to the ballroom, um, a very special friend of his named Carey – well, his real name isn’t Carey, his real name is Archibald; John Cameron calls him Archibald and that’s how the janitor knew this, but everybody else knew him as Carey, and he’s a very special friend of John’s.

As a matter of fact, there are a lot of rumors about the fact that they were very, very special friends, and, um… the janitor did see something that reinforced that idea very strongly one time, um, something innocent but something that let on that they were more than friends, and, uh, everyone in the Orbiting Human Circus would freak out, of course, when this fellow would come visit, which would be a few times a year, because he’s a movie star and so everybody was kind of dazzled and the janitor had seen him in movies, the janitors—one of the janitor’s favorite movies was called “Holiday”, and Carey was in this movie, and, uh, you know, the janitor was just completely… star-struck whenever he’d come around and he was, he’s just a very, very sweet person, and he was very, very elegant and handsome.

I don’t think the janitor had a crush on him or anything like that, uh, but he was just incredibly objectively handsome, which, you know, and kind, and uh… and so when he would visit, it would always be this very interesting thing, and I think it kind of fascinated—he kind of fascinated the janitor, and watching Archibald and John together was very fascinating for the janitor, um, and so there are different stories associated with his visits that—hopefully some of which will make it into season two, I hope I haven’t just ruined season two for you. I mean, it’s a very small thing, but that was something that, as a matter of fact, the jacket that John Cameron gave to the janitor was actually Carey’s, it was something that Carey had left behind and Carey always leaves his clothes everywhere, he’s very forgetful, and being a movie star, he could avoid lots and lots of jackets, so that was actually where the jacket that John Cameron passed onto the janitor came from.

Uh, another thing that’s an answer to another question, there’s, uh, that I think would be fun to tell is that, um, it was a question about the hypnosis episode when the janitor accidentally hypnotized everybody and the janitor himself was hypnotized into believing his greatest fantasy, which was singing on the show, was happening.

And, uh, the question was about the janitor forgiving John Cameron and, uh, John Cameron’s motivations, and one thing that I think is pretty important or worth knowing was that I don’t believe that John Cameron knew what the hypnotist was gonna do. I think he knew that the hypnotist needed subjects and he knew John Cameron, like everybody, had heard that the janitor’s great-grandfather’s the stage hypnotist, of course, and John knew that stage hypnosis was very special to the janitor and he knew the janitor was important—uh, was excited about the hypnotist coming and he wanted to do something nice for him, and so I think in John’s mind he thought he was doing something really, really sweet by letting the janitor come on the show and be a subject, but he wanted it to be a surprise, and, uh, and so…

When the hypnotist brought the janitor out, and the kiddie pool came out and the lederhosen and the janitor was in a trance, I think John was a little bit horrified, uh, or wasn’t… I don’t know if horrified’s the right word, I think he was turning red, but John is, as you’ve seen, one of the truly great and consummate natural showmen, and that he shares something in common with his John Cameron Mitchell, who portrays him, in my opinion, and, uh, so John just did what John Cameron would do, which is kind of turn red and play along with it, and ultimately keep the show going, he couldn’t really focus on those feelings.

That’s a tough show to keep running, so that’s kind of what happened there.

Another question that somebody asked was “How much of the janitor’s story is real versus part of his imagination in contrast, I imagine, to the radio show?” You know, so things like his great-grandpa and his polar bear boyfriend and all of that. And the answer to that question is that all of those things are real.

One question that was asked was “Are the people of the Orbiting Human Circus” – and I think that means Jacques and Laeticia and Francois and Pierre and, um, John Cameron – “are those people from the janitor’s life or were they people that he completely imagined?”

And, um, the answer is, which you would find out anyway, will find out, but I think I can tell you, um – the answer is that they are all people from his life, from his real life, not his imagination. They’re all people that he has a relationship to and that he knows, and his imaginings of them, which is what you experienced in the show sequences, um… were very much like them, um, and some of them are even based on real experiences he had with those people, just some of the superficial details were mushed around. Others of those experiences were his imaginings of interactions he might have, and imaginings inspired by his understanding of those people, or his interest in or his affection for or his fear of, depending, of those people. And you’ll get to know them even better.

You know, their roles in real life and the things that they do might be slightly different, but even that is, I think, in a pretty neat way, so there.

Oh, another big question that a lot of you asked, uh, was “Is Julian not straight?” And, um, like the polar bear question and a couple of other questions, I don’t know for sure if the question was referring to me or the janitor, but I understand the question really well, because I know how important it can be at different points in people’s lives to be able to relate to, you know, to find characters in things that they love or like that they can relate to or to find people who make things that they like that they can relate to or they feel like are like them, and so I’m happy to answer that question on both of our behalves, me and the janitor, and the answer is the same – neither of us are straight.

Another question about Laeticia was “What’s the heaviest item that Laeticia can deadlift?” And all I have to say is that she didn’t really need the handtruck to lift the polar bear box up the stairs. As a matter of fact, the handtruck wasn’t originally in the script.

One question about Jacques that someone asked was “Is Jacques as tough as he thinks he is?” And the answer to that, I think, is Laeticia is as tough as Jacques thinks he is. I think Laeticia beat him at arm wrestling, although I think that he really doesn’t like to talk about that or think about that.

Okay, a really good question that I got was, um, ��Can all crickets tell stories?” And the answer to that is yes, crickets are the greatest storytellers in the world, um, and it is true that if a bird catches a cricket, it gives it a chance to tell a story and if it’s a good one, the bird will spare the cricket’s life; all of that is absolutely true.

So somebody asked me how the Narrator first met the janitor or how the janitor first met the Narrator, and they first met, um, when the janitor was quite little. It was the first time that the janitor ever tried to sneak out of the house. His stepdad had tied all these sleigh bells to the doorknob of the house, he said to keep burglars away, but it, you know, was probably to keep the janitor in, and the floorboards creaked and stuff like that, and the janitor’s parents left the door to their bedroom open, um, to hear what he was doing, uh, but he did try to sneak out this one time, and as he was trying to do it he just found himself narrating his experience, which made him feel more like he was in a story or was a, was a hero of a—of a movie or something, and he was able to follow through the sneaking out.

Now, um… you all know from when the janitor talked about it in episode two, that—you know, the time that the janitor’s stepdad hit him in the ear, and of course there was the ringing in the—in the janitor’s ear, and then that ringing actually turned into this [exhaling] sound that was kind of like a, well, it was kind of like an audience, and the janitor had been imagining that there was an audience, and suddenly the janitor was filled with this feeling that there were all these people there cheering for him and supporting him and he didn’t cry.

And he stood up to his stepfather for the first time, and he was able to stand up to his stepfather because he just felt like he had all those people behind him, you know, that everyone was with him and rooting for him, and that sound, that [exhaling] sound in his ear actually stayed for quite a long time, and so did the feeling that the audience was with him and that was how he started imagining that he had an audience, and that feeling gave him the strength and the courage to run away.

Now, somebody asked if in the show, the Narrator was addressing the janitor’s imaginary audience or the janitor himself. The answer is both, because in the end when the platypus finally came for the janitor after he had spent his whole life hoping it would, and the janitor made that wish, um, it was, you know, the janitor knows that the platypus is just a dream, but he also believes that if you see it and you make that wish, that it’ll come true, and he believes that his—his wish came true and that you exist.

You know, of course, for him that’s just a matter of faith, you know he’s right.

Someone asked if that wish made the radio show, uh, the Orbiting Human Circus, real as well. And I think the answer to that is, if you exist, and you’ve been listening to it, well then… it’s a real show.

Thank you, and… bye!

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