#try to change my fuckin mind

[dkettchen]

it's been a year of blondes, boobs, and one piece apparently

#art vs artist #art vs artist 2023 #one piece #barbie movie #nimona #something about lemons #live action one piece #zosan #sanami #and my 10 year web comic anniversary #and getting fms #and getting my T dose raised #and moving across the country #and trying to get into and being broken by stupid media industry to the point of changing my whole ass career plan smh #((fuckin hell was that all this year is that why I'm this tired god)) #but NO BIG DEAL LOOK AT BIG TIDDY SANJI INSTEAD (available in two whole gender varieties) ye ye ye ye ahahahahaha #guess who had too much one piece art to make up his mind and decided to collage it instead #(there was more this isn't even all of the *renders* let alone the sketchy comics)

[spiderwebbd]

Happy blorthday to @arcade-unknown you are SO cool/gen

Quality is so bad but. Have a little doodle :D

#I wanted to draw olivur (thats how u spell it right I can't check rn) but it is almost midnight and tomorrow is Monday so womp womp #I HOPE UOU DON'T MIND HOW WONKY IT LOOKS I RLLY SPEEDRAN IT I'M SORRY DJFHFHFH #soda art #<- I'M GONNA CHANGE THE TAG SOON I SWEAR #Ure actually so fuckin cool I'm so nervous JSHDHFHFJF #Phighting! #I AM STILL LEARNING HOW TO DRAW CHUBBY PEOPLE PLS I'M TRYING MY BEST GUYS DON'T BULLY ME/GEN #I think it's the shoulders eugh will take notes for next time 👍

[angelnumber27]

Last night I made a list of all the ways drinking has been negatively effecting me, my relationships, those around me, my body and mind, and my life as a whole recently.

There are 45 separate things listed on there so far

#it’s just .. idk how to go from a pint of vodka a night to nothing #if I try to taper or ween off I’ll just keep drinking too much #I can’t sleep without it anymore either even when I take like 300mg seroquel #literally need fuckin at least 8 drinks to even sleep anymore.. #if I do get to sleep it will be like an hour before my sleep is disrupted #I’m fed up #and I don’t want to do this to myself anymore #but it’s so much easier said than done #I know if I continue on this path my body and mind will both continue to be damaged #and I know that if I don’t do something very soon I could end up drinking like this or worse for the rest of my life. #I want and deserve better than that #there is so much more to life than this #and I intend to experience as much of it as possible. without needing a substance to get through the day #ah #I don’t want to be like this anymore #but I really fear it’s too late to change or turn back #sorry lol a lot on my mind

[soldier-poet-king]

My father, talking abt how one of his co-workers is maybe autistic. My brother, immediately, well as long as he's high functioning. My dumb ass trying to explain why the term high functioning can be harmful and while a lot of professionals still use it, autism self advocates are trying to push away from it. Deliberately trying to explain this without using any sort of "fancy" terminology or strange concepte. My aunt, disdainfully, ugh all this terminology it's changing everyday I can't keep up.

Being assertive and Present is going. So well.

#franposting #why do i fuckin bother #trying to be like. a person. and a good person. its not going well #this is why i shut up and dont say anything #unless im drunk or extremely mad #i will simply. stay out of the way and pretend i dont exist #its easier #and im tired of being disappointed even in my quote unquote more resonable family members (ie. my aunt) #how at the end of all things is my mother the most resonable open minded person #not to b like terrible hallmark movies and primetime tv shows have changed her #but like. even the bullshit tokenism on tv. helps sometimes? my mother is like. oh i saw a gay/trans/disabled/etc person in this shoe #show* and suddenly shes like. even the slightest bit more accepting or able to see them as human beings #its so fuckin stupid. and conflicting #and i still hate her so much of the time. she caused so much of my trauma #god i need to get out of here but god everything is so expensive and im a coward #and im afraid i dont know how to be a person on my own anymore. if i ever really did

[moonlitlunas]

it's actually so so soo cool to me that miguel's suit is a hologram and performs like an LED screen on his body; i love that they added this detail bc it gives so much depth to his suit that would otherwise be lost like it makes the meso american inspired patterns on his suit such an enagmatic glow and makes his suit so cool to look at!!! just a million stars glowing on him !!!

SEE !!! THE CIRCUITRY... ITS SO FUCKING COOL !!!

#i just think he's neat #little fuckin nerd miguel trying to make himself a cool looking suit after he literally expanded to twice his previous size lol #he has the pantone app open on his monitor #“lyla change the red from DF1F2D to B11313” #my personal hc is that he for sure added the mesoamerican influences much later on bc he had a spidey moment with a little latine kid #saved a kid downtown from those public eye goons and the kid looks up half scared/half in awe at his stature #the kid's guardian yells something in spanish while running towards them #so naturally #he squats down to be eye level with the kid and says something along the lines of “everything's gonna be alright kid” in spanish #and he swings away #but just out of his peripherals he sees the kid lose their mind #he picks up a faint gracias or other term of gratitude and lets a small smile escape his lips #and then he starts to notice just how many spider ppl have incorporated their heritage/nationality into their costume #and he's reminded of that kid #how excited they were to share something as binding as their mother tongue with thee spiderman #now all of a sudden he's spent the next 16 hours trying to incorporate traditional mesoamerican patterns into his costume's design #maybe it's lyla's idea to make them golden looking so they're endlessly shifting in a stunning contrast against the red #my miguelito #yeah #im totally normal abt him btw #idgaf actually #spidey #i can fix him #miguel o'hara #atsv miguel #miguel spiderverse #miguel spiderman #spiderman 2099 #spiderman atsv #spider verse

[eebie]

we are deconstructing gender on Google docs tonight boys

#this is stupid LMAO im annotating stuff from a guy from liek the 1400s who prolly didnt even give a shit #when he wrote that In the spirit realm the concept of gender is nebulous at BEST #if not just totally absent #he was like.. ya spirit beings change their genders all the time They switch tey can be combinations they can be nothing #reading that like Hemm…. well 1 big belief Thats held in christianity is that people are spirit beings underneath all the flesh #so what does that mean for the people who are dead set on Sex Organs determining peoples personalities ? idk. makes you think #gender means jack shit basically. #a lot of people raised male tend to behave in certain ways Not because of their sex but because of expectations And norms #and same with people raised female #and that shit goes alll the way back 2 the stone age #obligatory Nothing wrong w falling into gender stereotypes if its stuff u genuinely like!!^_^ #anyways i rambled #i would have rambled more if tumblr wasnt trying to kill itself as i was typing #my rambles #my little peewee brain is sometimes capable of coherent thought But calling this coherent migjt be a stretch #bc im hardly in any mind 2 decide if im making sense . its like a fuckin echo chamber up in my brain N every echo becomes more n more warpd #until it eventually sounds normal 2 me ^_^ but when i voice it. the. suddenly i realize Wow thats fucked! #which is why. i usually keep my mouth shut !!! #but thats also bad .real bad If ur opinions always go unchallenged you may as well not even have them #should alwayd know Why you think what u do

[dolokhoded]

"people wanting to be happy doesn't mean they wish you ill" and the 'wanting to be happy' in question is wanting to fund zionists who have openly expressed support for joe biden (and SPECIFICALLY his contribution in the palestinian genocide) and choosing to actively ignore anything that doesn't personally affect them simply because they have the privilege to do so instead of advocating for those who don't. they do wish people ill actually yes

#🧅 #'but dolokhoded how dare you be a hypocrite you used to like this person' yeah and then i got all the facts and educated myself and fuckin. #idk changed my mind? and decided i have to do better? u should do it too. #fuck the lot of you #the 'little things <3' that y'all find (non-substantial) happiness (your happiness can't depend on a tv show!) in are supporting people who #are actively trying to keep people quiet about palestine. so yeah like probably find something else to watch.

[simpledyiing]

Sneak peek to Don't Stand So Close To Me - Part two

As I mentioned early, this story entails Pete's Birthday but I also decided to do a little flashback into how the relationship between Pete and Y/N started (context for this sneak peek) But I'm trying to finish this up while also trying to complete a govt course lol but I'm trying to have part two out by Wednesday

~

The back door swung open to reveal Ron "Slider" Kerner’s head poking out to burst their bubble “Y/N, your father is looking for you, maybe shorten your ‘puff’ break huh..” it was an almost comical 360 slider took when noticing Maverick sitting across her on the porch steps “Y/N anything he has said about me is a lie” the breath of laughter condensated in the night’s sky “Wow someone is either really full of themselves or paranoid, for your information we were talking about Christmas movies” the exaggerated eye roll from the older man triggered her own before an outstretched hand appeared once again in her peripheral, as the mere thought of having him touch her again with those rough, callous hands, a wave of heat was shot through her body. She couldn’t help but feel disappointed as his hand dropped from her own, as he helped her upright. Until Pete placed it casually on her lower back as he guided her towards the entranceway that Slider just retreated from. Y/N felt her knees buckle at the sweet, confident smile he sent her way as he held the door open, the huff of air forced itself into the air filled with the overlapping conversations taking place in the living room. As Y/N willed herself to take the first step into the doorway Pete’s voice stopped her in her tracks “Y’Know we could watch the best Christmas movie after dinner, if you like?” the laughter bubbling through her lips was the only confirmation he needed “Only if you sit by me during dinner” she felt like she could die just by his smile alone until he winked at her… once again the feeling of overwhelming heat coursed through her system “Deal”

~

“Sweetheart, I’ve been looking for you, where have you been? Your mother is throwing a fit, considering ‘you disappeared on her an hour ago’… I think she’s being dramatic like usual but dinner is about to start, so shall we?” Y/N looked back over at Pete before linking arms with her father as they made their way through the dining room.

To most people, they saw Admiral Tom “Iceman” Kazansky as a calculated pilot with a cold exterior that was off-putting to what he considered "sensitive" people but at this very moment, he was a doting father that was putty in his youngest daughter’s hands. As if she was the most important thing in this world, and she was to him. It didn’t help that Y/N was gleaming up at her father as he pushed her chair in, before sitting right beside her at the head of the table. The older Kazansky children couldn't help but roll their eyes in disgust as their father displayed his favoritism towards their sister so publicly, he didn’t even spare them a glance nor the people seated around them.

~~

If you want to be tagged for future installments please let me know

Masterlist Here

#ICE IS SUCH A GREAT DAD #try and change my mind #YOU FUCKIN CANT #Top gun #Top gun: maverick #Top gun imagine #Top gun: maverick imagine #Top gun x reader #Top gun: maverick x reader #Pete “Maverick” Mitchell #Pete Mitchell imagine #Pete Mitchell x reader #Pete Mitchell smut #Pete “Maverick” Mitchell smut #Pete “Maverick” Mitchell imagine #Pete “Maverick” Mitchell x reader #Maverick Mitchell imagine #Maverick Mitchell x reader #Maverick Mitchell smut #Maverick imagine #Maverick smut #Maverick x reader

[sea-jello]

so you asked for ocs and if you're interested I have an oc blog called clouds-oc-corner?? and I have all my guys listed in the intro post (along with the art tag) so

yeah?

i feel like drawing other peoples shit is kinda fun so if you have?? an oc blorbo?? or an au mf?? send em over in the asks and i might scribble them out. i’m friendly i promise please send them. kill the part of you that cringes

i GOTCHU cloud

i can’t decide between the eyes so you get both

!!this is @forecast-rain / @clouds-oc-corner ’s oc sylvia!!

fun fact my first oc i made when i was like 9 was also a catgirl 💀💀 so i felt obligated to do this one first but I WILL DO MORE. maybe not all of them but i have Ideas

anyways yeah!! she was really fun to draw and if anyone wants a free janky commission of their ocs or au blorbos send them over in the asks!!

#please tell me which version of the eyes look better i can’t tell #the first one looks a lil janky i’m ngl 💀💀 #this was?? my first time trying out coloured lineart?? #I KINDA LIKE IT YK #i have vague ideas for mike and tina #i’ll get there. soon i promise #idk how the sitting would work w the tail so i improvised #i hope i didn’t get the personality (??) wrong cause idk if she’ll sit like that #i dunno it’s a very specific pose #my artstyle keeps CHANGING #free fuckin commissions guys get them in #oc art #not my oc #jellos scribbles #im signing my shit now 😌😌 i’m so PROFESSIONAL #i hope you don’t mind i signed it help

[daincrediblegg]

My dad really just tried to shake my love for RDA by showing pictures of him “then and now” as a bedraggled grey haired old man… jokes on him that I’m into that shit

#literally some tabloid article trying to be like ‘look at how fuckin old and bad they look! you wanted to have sex with that once!’ #clown behavior #I’d fuck the living daylights out of that old man he was hot then and he’s still hot now and you can’t change my mind #well maybe not that old man bc thats one who actually IS older than my dad but like #theoretically I am down #and these people have absolutely no taste

[snekdood]

probably my greatest strength is getting out of suicidal episodes by myself.

#however it makes me resent humans as you can see #i think id rather resent humans though than to needlessly punish myself just bc other ppl dont like me #whether for reasons i just dont understand. some dumb thing i said once or bc they believe bs ppl say about me #like theres no reason i have to punish myself for that. for yall like that. fuck you. #like for some of you. ill never be goodor woke enough. even if all the bs ppl make up about me is proven false. even if i clarify #what i meant when i said whatever thing bc im bad at communicating my thoughts through text. even if i became jesus fuckin christ #yall would probably still just hate me for no fucking reason. theres no way i could be good enough or perfect enough or anything #theres no way i can change and modify my behavior and stand on my head that will satisfy you. #and with that in mind. why should i give a fuck about trying? who tf are you to assert that i need to change myself for you #some random fucking person online. #get fucked #you do not know me. #i will never be the thing you want me to be #i will never be the perfect version of me that you want me to be #im going to become the better version of myself that i think i can be and should be #but im not going to turn into the better version of myself that YOUUUU think i should be. #especially since yall dont even give me an alternative. you tell me not to do things and im left to just sit perfectly still #god forbid i move a muscle. thats the better version of me to you. motionless and mute. #and if thats what you believe i hope you shove a jar up your ass and it pops inside you. #im going to be my loud ass bat self and theres nothing you can do about it unless you wanna try to actually fucking kill me. #step up or shut up.

[mikkaeus]

me trying to edit anything complex i dont think it’s working out lads

#im throwign this away i give up this is so fucking funny #simple text it is #(this was me trying to plan a gif) #always plan with images before you sit through ten hours of VS processing time only for you to change your mind about the ratios.... #also all i can think of is that fuckign meme #like with the sad guy that's like reflected #BUT I CANT EVEN REMEMBER IT THAT WELL SO I CANT FIND IT #u know the guy that's like singing??? but sad #lik eoverdramatic #WHAT IS IT #OH MY FUCKIN GOD I FOUND IT #DRAMATIC DIMITRY #ramblings

[zebruh]

fuck me my grandma still needs someone at the hospital with her and None of the other family can cause they're either bedridden or out of town and I'm the only one showing up every fucking day for this woman I don't know what the hell to do cause I've been burning the candle at both ends for a week now and this is the second week of he rhsopialization I'm at my wits end I wish I could have some help but fuck I'm fuckin going crazy here I already am going insane with worry but now I'm sleeping thru all my alarms and can't wake up on time for anything I'm fuckin exhausted I need a break please fuckin anyone show up and stay with this woman more than five minutes I canr do this shit anymore i need to stay at home and stare at a wall for a week straight now I'm fuckin exhausted

#vwitty banter #i cant wait for he rto get out the hospital so i can REST #fuck im tired im so fuckin tired sleep doesnt fix it anymore and i was getting restful sleep!!!! but fuckin hell not anymore #especially since Every Day my grandma goes on about how i need to save myself from the rapture or else ill regret it #i jeep telling the woman i try to respect her religion but once she starts forcing it on me its rude and im not changing my mind #so shes being nothing but rude about my religious choices #which she calls a lifestyle #like just shut the fuck up and worry about eating your damn food woman we need you out the hospital before i fuckin strangle you

[vagueiish]

what are you supposed to do when the thing you want also happens to be a thing that has a high chance of kicking off a major spiral of self-loathing? and it’s something that’s apparently kind of necessary to be a fully actualized human being???

#what i want: friends. community. as most of us do i’d wager #(it’s not all i want but like…..it’s what i’m talking about) #but i don’t really have any of that #and i know the way to change that is to not isolate and be among other people #but then i’m exposed to other people who generally clearly…belong #seeing other people wanted by those around them when you don’t feel like you belong is uh……. #it’s fuckin painful lmao #and inevitably it kicks off those thoughts of ‘what the hell is wrong with me that i cant do that?’ #but isolation (or near isolation i suppose) isn’t the actual answer because that just… that just reinforces it all right #but i’ve lost my ability to socialize and i don’t have anyone or anywhere to practice because if i fuck up in the practice #….idk. i cant to afford to fuck up #all those posts about being annoying is inevitable. it’s human. those who matter wont mind etc #all well and good. #must be nice to be confident in your standing with people #cant afford that myself but you do you i guess #it’s easy to take that kind of risk when you know you’ll be loved no matter what i’m sure #whatever. had another point i wanted to hit but got lost on the way #isolation is safe and the way to go. community is overrated. until it isnt #but it doesnt matter if youre not wanted. yknow? #community only exists with reciprocation #and maybe i’m generalizing like hell when i’m like ‘well *nobody* would wanna connect with me’ #and i’m just fulfilling this shit myself when i don’t even try #but. like. why would i be wrong here? evidence suggests i’m not worth knowing #and i have nothing to give #so…. yeah #to the void with love

[arolesbianism]

You see oni is great because it's full of the lamest nonbinary people you've ever met except they're also all just some guy except they're also all massive freaks and also there's more of these freaks that are binary gendered it's just lame freaks all the way down

#rat rambles #oni posting #like even the ones that maybe seem likw they could be cool on the surface are so fucking lame its because theyre all loser ass nerds #every fun fact abt these guys is just yep this is nails theyre a rubix cube champion this is devon they have a blog abt toast #and then they hit you with the fucked up shit and you just stare into space for half an hour processing it all #and by space I mean the space tab in game as you close the database tab after having offhandedly clicking on the new log notification #quinn and amari honeys Im so fuckin worried abt what happened to yall #this is a bit win for me though the number one and only quinn fan #Im sure they would both be horrified and proud of my quinn's existence and acomplishments #oh yeah I finally moved quinn back home I felt kind of bad since the new colony was starting to look rly good but joshua had already almost #died to prepare for this so I couldnt just change my mind last minute #also I accidentally printed two lindsay's since I didn't realize one of my mods kinda broke the prints #but its ok it may be a bit awkward having two of them on the same planet but I can just imagine them as fun twinsies or smth #I actually do plan on making lil designs for all my dupes once Im done as a way of trying to fight artblock #I wanna lean into them being their own lil guys I am ocing the hell out of them #also yes I will be furryifying some of them but not all of them #would you believe me if I said that I did this because of olivia stuff and not because of furry stuff? #the correct answer is no but I do have olivia thoughts regarding this #and I shall proceed to not go into them because its late and I need to shower

[fr3shteeth]

no bcuz the way some of my (former/ex) mutuals just fuckin’ dunked on anyone + everyone who previously were bigoted WHILST REALIZING THEIR BIGOTRY IS WRONG + ACTIVELY CHANGING FOR THE BETTER, MIND YOU, is something that never ceases to amaze me (heavy sarcasm)

like on 1 hand, yeah, nobody owes these people forgiveness, let alone should their bigoted actions not be scrutinized because of it, but at what fucking point can you claim someone is a bigot when they’ve not only acknowledged their wrongdoings, but have also been making strides to be proactive about the changes they want to see in themselves + others.

like...some of you say that you’re “open to change,” yet you can’t be bothered to not get pissed when someone who has previously said/done shitty things and is actively acknowledging + wanting to change themselves away from it.

#teeth's ramblings #maybe it’s bcuz when i was a pre-teen who had pushed stupid fuckin’ narratives on others (which was never okay + still isn’t) and has- #-tried to change myself into someone who *isn’t* that ever again and it all just. #it gets to me!!!! nobody should cover my ass for my [ex]transmed bs + it’s nobody’s responsibility but my own to- #-recognize that hey!! what i’d said was fucked!!!! and continue to work on myself to this very day #keep in mind i’ve been working on myself for *years* now. even after i got myself out of that bullshit. #but like. if you’re gonna shit on some1 who’s trying their best 2 change for the better...you’re also apart of the problem. #to even say “once a bigot/always a bigot” is so fuckin’ idiotic because shocking as it may seem...people can change over time!!!!!