#tw internalized fatphobia

[wolf-tail]

Still in my Dadbod Guilliman Era and I am full of THOUGHTS!

Tw: Internalized fatphobia

He'd be embarrased by it at first. Internalized fatphobia go brrr, and he's ashamed at not being able to force himself to meet the Perfect Ideal God Body standards.

He'd try to hide it, wider togas to disguise his chubbier gut and thicker thighs, holoprojectors if he gets really desperate,while he desperately tries to lose weight. He'd end up falling back into unhealthy eating patterns, forcing himself to take smaller portions and eat less often, ignoring his rumbling stomach and dizzy spells the best he can, but his body has needs he can't just ignore if he wants to stay functional. But the final straw comes when he realizes that he can't comfortably fit in his armour anymore and every battle is the 9th Circle of Autism Sensory Hell because he has to squeeze himself in. Poor thing would despise himself for lacking the "self control" to stay skinny :(

Imagine being his S/O who's there to comfort him by telling him how gorgeous and powerful his new body is💞💞💞

@ms--lobotomy @kit-williams @egrets-not-regrets @angronsjewelbeetle

#warhammer 40k x reader #x reader #warhammer 40000 #roboute guilliman #tw internalized fatphobia

[ben-man]

Text:

"you hate this photo, your mother kisses it when she goes to sleep, she kisses it like a rosary. she holds it like a prayer. she asks herself where you went. she tries to forgive herself for not knowing one day would be the last you smiled wide enough to scrunch your nose up. she forgives herself for not remembering it. you hate yourself. you hate the way the fat on your body rolls and undulates, you know the flesh on your bones in this picture must be an illusion, its unbefitting of g-d."

"your father asked you to do a second photo 'with a nice smile this time'. you want him to be happy, and smile when he sees you."

"when they bury you it is in a closed casket, they tell your mother what you have done. she can't hear them over the way you laughed in 1991. her baby is 5. 5 and still growing."

#light yagami #death note #death note fanart #my art #tw: fatphobia #tw fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia #tw: internalized fatphobia #I like light yagami a lot #I wanted to draw a childhood photo of him #and write about his mom #and the way he smiled big and ugly as a kid #and him having a closed casket #im very normal about him #also for any confused goys wondering why g-d is censored #im very jewish #also he looks at himself when hes five and can only think about how imperfect and ugly he looks #when he was barely old enough to count and still climbed into his mothers bed when he had nightmares #anyway hope my abnormality about him is appreciated by someone #I was originally going to have the final text be 'my baby what have you done?' #I just think he had a lot of self worth issues as teen. I mean what teen doesnt but cmon. he looks like a supermodel and it just honestly #makes more sense if thats because he has some terrible issues and also hes light yagami #he cant be fucking normal about anything #its all the mask and the illusion #not to make the overdone patrick bateman comparison #but ya know

[narcpocalypse]

Idk if this is a thing for anyone else but does anyone also have this insanely different image of themselves in their head to motivate you to be sexier only to also have the executive dysfunction to kill those dreams? Bc. ME! Internalized fatphobia moment when I visualize myself as this skinny hunk who's charisma is oozing out of my abs. No I'm just a Pillsbury dough boy. I'm like "yeah I'm gonna look like this one day" no u won't ur built like a circle (/pos) and don't need to conform to beauty standards. Reminder u can be unconventionally attractive and hot!

#i will never truly believe this ab myself but a man can try #narcissistic personality disorder #narcposting #npd #actually narcissistic #actually npd #actually cluster b #npd safe #cluster b #cluster b safe #narc #fat #tw internalized fatphobia

[inthenight-inthedark]

Food has no moral value. Your weight has no moral value. Food is the fuel that keeps you alive and weight is just a number

#internalized fatphobia is affecting one of my kids today #trying to teach her that she will be ok #she’s an athlete too - top of her sport - and she thinks she’s fat and needs to cut weight #like no baby no!!!! #anyways #internalized fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia #fatphobia #tw fatphobia #tw food mention #food mention #mavspeaks

[flirts-with-dragons]

I hate myself at my current weight like I'm supposed to be a little twink butch but instead I gained a lot of weight this year and now I don't look like how I'm supposed to

I did mention I cried at the gym yesterday because I looked in the big mirror and saw what I really look like (I don't have full length mirrors at my house). That's because of my weight and my never-ending face acne (dermatillomania shit).

So I decided to stop taking my birth control pill that was causing the weight gain and I know my endometriosis is gonna have me puking every period now but augh. I just can't like myself at this weight I just can't it doesn't make sense for me to look like this

#tw weight #tw weight gain #tw weight talk #internalized fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia #weight gain #weight talk #i cant really find any other trigger tags #just tell me to tag it something and i will

[theharddeck]

I hate looking at old pictures

ugh I need Javy Machado to kiss the side of my neck and tell me I’m beautiful

I didn’t feel skinny then, and I know if I made myself miserable and lost 50 lbs to get back to there, I’d still be insecure. I just hate that when I look at these pictures all I can think is that I looked prettier. so yeah fuck internalized fatphobia, fuck the women who pinched my arms then, and click their tongues disappointedly when they see me now 🖕🏼 and an enormous fuck you to the man who told me he loved me and that’s why he wanted me to watch my weight

#tw weight #tw internalized fatphobia #sana things

[leafboy-the-great]

I know it shouldn't be an issue, and I always love myself until there's a romantic or sexual relationship involved.

I was taught that my body was undesirable by anyone except bbw fetishists.

Since i was 7 i was fundamentally aware that finding love would be so much harder due to how I was born.

Especially due to the fact that my body developed strangely, and my body is extremely disproportionate

I'm just so tired of every single bit of love for myself I had being ripped away from me because of one dumb intrusive thought society taught me was true

#vent #tw fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia

[tirednapentity]

I’m thinking about how i can barely ever reblog fat positivity posts on here because they hurt all over again, the way it hurts to clean a wound. I’m thinking about how i want to run every time someone talks about BMI in my vicinity and how can’t because there’s nothing that makes me feel worse than running - a girl i know approached me to say how the others had made fun of the way the fat on my stomach jiggled when i ran in PE. She was furious on my behalf and i told her it was fine. I can count the times i’ve run since that day on one hand. I don’t participate in PE anymore. I’m thinking about that guy the other day saying how being vegan was an eating disorder and how furious i was. My eating disorder was the first thing I’ve hated myself for, you do not get to trivialize that. I’m thinking about my mother denouncing health at every size and how i still think she was right. I’m thinking about how i’ve been told to hate myself for the way my body looks for my entire life since i was six years old and how i can’t even begin to move away from that because honestly? I’ve always known they were right. 

#vent #fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia #sorrrrryyy i promise I’m still silly

[honey-mice]

i wish i didnt think i need to be skinny to wear cute clothes... it just makes me never wear cute things.. and its so hard to lose weight cause mental illness... and its not even a problem that im overweight.. i just hsve really bad internalized fatphobia :/

#vent #tw internalized fatphobia

[the-everqueen]

postponing my usual run bc i had to put in a maintenance request for our bathroom (yay plumbing) and i'd prefer to be home if they come. hopefully that gets resolved before i have to go to a work event! but also this mild disruption to my usual routine is making the ocd go nuts.

#yada yada #it's INCREDIBLE how fast my brain can flip from ''this is a good body day!'' to ''feel every fold and bit of fat and SCREAM'' #ostensibly nothing has changed #ostensibly doing a quick hiit run while sore would not have changed much #i can do it tomorrow before class instead! #it's literally fine! #even if i skip a run this week entirely that's also fine! #sometimes shit happens! #(my brain insists i have immediately doubled my weight and ruined any fitness progress) #anyways cool that's. going on. #tw body dysphoria #...can you imagine if i ever managed to get a therapist who could address this shit and i believed them? #(...all my past and current psychs/therapists have unwittingly encouraged my relationship to exercise) #tw internalized fatphobia

[ben-man]

Please tell me more about fat Light. I’m so curious

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW EXCITED I AM TO TALK ABOUT THIS I am quite literally physically vibrating. I grew up fat and remain fat so please for the love of fuck nobody be rude about me being just unfiltered about this.

Light Yagami is so obsessed with his exterior shell. His like beautiful ornate carapace. His mask. He's obsessed with his image, and a huge reason for this is his fathers position in society and being the perfect son to make his family proud and the fact that he is empty. There is a certain type of childhood where you grow up with a pit in your gut and anger in your heart and no reasonable place to put it or explanation for why you feel that way.

He is a young boy given the power to kill people, and an unnatural boredom borne of his privilege, nature, and power. He's unchallenged by school, he finds no connection in those around him, the distance between him and his family may as well be a chasm. There is no 'real' Light Yagami you will find under that flesh he cloaks himself in (because he doesn't even know who he is himself, he never got the opportunity to.)

I write this fairly often but I hate the characterization where Light is written as if Light and Kira are two different people. Kira is a young boys realization that if he acts sweet and remorseful enough he can get away with breaking other kids toys. It's the fucking feeling in the air when someone's position gives them the power to do whatever bloody cruel thing they want. Kira is a round-faced boy with a terrible weapon to kill. Many people forget that when Light first killed someone (in the manga) he basically cowered under his bedsheets for an entire night. He is bored, and he is empty, and to him excitement and feeling comes when he is so nervous he feels bile in his mouth.

In my mind he grows up fat, he's a pudgy fucking kid. And you know when you're young and fat and you are meant to be fingerpainting you crawl up that step stool and look in the mirror wondering why your soft, fat, unmanageable body doesn't look good enough.

And when you become an adult, for some the doorway to changing your body opens. It can fucking eat you whole man! And I write Light Yagami with these issues and interpret him as having a fuck ton of internalized fatphobia and body image issues, and now he's thin, unhealthily so. I usually write him struggling with eating.

When I do write him having the happy ending he doesn't deserve, I write him gaining weight as a good thing, and that means a lot to me! Internalized fatphobia makes you bitter and cruel not just to yourself but to others. He gets a very prominent double chin and gets larger gradually as he ages I think.

Also my friend @kattidiot wrote a BEAUTIFUL (unpublished) Light Yagami drabble about him being a child and crushing ants and his mother teaching him to bake so he directs that energy not toward covering his fingers in bug guts and he's looking back on that childhood and describes his fat little boy hands and how he doesn't want to add too much butter or sugar and so it always comes out wrong and his cruel perspective on his own baby-faced self is like so well written its like electric.

Anyway yeah diversity win the deranged mass murderer is fat.

#light yagami #death note #tw internalized fatphobia #tw: internalized fatphobia #tw: ed mention #tw ed mention #tw: fatphobia #tw fatphobia #for everyone who has it blocked #anyway THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK made me sohappy to talk about #also everyone follow katt :3 #I am so very very normal about Light Yagami #I relate to him which is a curse and probably a very bad sign #anyway one very important thing that was written by me and katt together #was the idea that his mother taught him to bake coffee cake #because he wanted to be like his dad #and drink coffee #and he doesnt remember what his favorite food is as a teen/young adult and couldnt tell you if you asked #but its coffee cake #I write about him and his mom a lot #his feet arent short enough to swing through the air as he kicks his feet from atop a kitchen stool watching her cook anymore #and he's a man now #and men arent supposed to bake with their mothers #and shes ugly now because shes graying and dyes her hair and he cannot be normal about women #he has to pity her because thats what old married mothers are for #even though he is much more pitiable. ya know. #I am the worlds most normal person about light fucking yagami #hope my insanity is appreciated by someone #thank you anon

[drakonovisny]

tw eating disorder mention

my old photos are triggering my eds again. feeling the urge to start counting calories like before, even if i know that the whole thing is bullshit

#it never helped #i always felt miserable about my body #on all of those photos #but the restriction made me feel in control #tw eds #tw eating disorder #tw fatphobia #tw internalized fatphobia #why am i having these thoughts the night before the most important exam of my life???

[eldritchwhispersofficial]

I am confused as fuck

because on the one hand plus size people are beautiful and get way way way too much judgement

but on the other hand I have severe trauma from watching my bio mom slowly gain weight due to her medical condition to the point where she could no longer walk

and I am horrified that I might inherit that condition and blow up to the size of a fucking Macy's Day Parade balloon

I have a BMI of 26.3 (5'6", 163 pounds) and I am TERRIFIED. I already have really REALLY bad body image issues (made worse by the fact that I'm trans) and this isn't helping.

I wear a small mens or medium mens (medium womens or large womens) and yet I am horrified about my weight and want to drop sixty pounds.

All bodies are beautiful. Except for mine.

#overweight #plus size #chubby #large #fat #all bodies are beautiful #except mine #tw internalized fatphobia #tw selfhate #tw vent

[ah-fuckme]

i want a thigh gap and i want to be so skinny people are jealous of me

#tw ed implied #tw @na #@nor3×14 #tw internalized fatphobia #ed not ed sheeran

[rottenmarquee]

Hate how my double chin show when i suck dick :(

#tw body insecurity #tw internalized fatphobia #idc when its on others why do i care when its ME?

[karometeenk]

Ugh also i'm gaining so much weight and it's not even showing on the scale this is so concerning. Like i look fatter i feel fatter my clothes which usually hang loosely fit perfectly now (which is a plus ngl) but the numbers are just staying low. Which leans i'm losing an insane amount of muscle mass during my two weeks off from uni.

#tw: weight mention #tw internalized fatphobia