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#while my dad preps his sunday school lesson right next to me
faeriefully · 5 months
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girls really do be raging a war in their own head whilst sitting silent in their living room
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hilarieburtonmorgan · 3 years
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Hilarie Burton Morgan On Home Beyond Hollywood And Working Beside Her Husband On ‘The Walking Dead’
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From her standout performances on beloved television series to a recent bestselling memoir, Hilarie Burton Morgan continues to take us along on her journey called life. Beginning her career as a MTV VJ in 2000 to regularly lighting up the small screen ever since, the 38-year-old actress and author wears multiple hats these days, with an even more important title of mother & wife leading her charge. Now with several exciting projects on the horizon, including her long-anticipated introduction into the expanding world of The Walking Dead beside her husband Jeffrey Dean Morgan , Hilarie is no doubt maintaining a lasting impression.
To truly appreciate her on-screen chemistry with Jeffrey, it would be helpful to know how they first connected off-screen. “I knew right away,” Hilarie tells Forbes about how soon she knew Jeffrey was the person for her, while sharing the story of how they met. “My very dear friend Danneel Ackles is married to Jensen Ackles and I would stay at their house every time I would go out to LA. When I was 26, I went to stay at their house and I think they got sick of me dating drifters. So Jensen was like ‘I’m going to introduce you to someone that I want to hang out with’ and he introduced me to Jeffrey, who had played his dad on Supernatural . It was pretty from the jump. He started sending me packages right away of books and love letters and he laid it on nice and thick and it worked! Here we are 12 years later.”
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AFP via Getty Images
Easter Sunday on AMC, The Walking Dead will reveal to viewers the backstory of Jeffrey’s character Negan and his ailing wife Lucille, played by Hilarie. Even though this important “Here’s Negan” season finale episode will be the first time you will actually see Lucille in action, Hilarie points out that her character has played an integral part on the hit series for some time now. “The mythology of Lucille has been around as long as Negan has been around,” Hilarie explains. “When it was introduced that he had a baseball bat that he used to kill people named Lucille, obviously there were questions surrounding who that was named after and he has been pretty forthcoming throughout the series that his dead wife was the inspiration for the name and he has talked a number of times about her cancer diagnosis, about her death, about what that loss meant to him. While Negan and my husband have been vilified over the last five or so years, to me what Lucille is, is a real glimpse into who Negan was pre-apocalypse and the man that she wanted him to be.”
Hilarie says being a real-life married couple portraying a married couple on television was an experience they really enjoyed together. “It was really wonderful. We have a really similar energy on-set. Neither one of us takes ourselves very seriously. We like joking around.” Hilarie also hopes that fans will better understand the violent ways of Negan after they get to see the love and heartbreak that he came from. “If there was ever a time for people to understand Negan’s aggression or his way of doing things, I feel like the entire world has been prepped for that over the last year. So Lucille comes in as the person who loves him the most and loves him even with his flaws. Perhaps the audience if they don’t already love him, which they should, perhaps they can follow Lucille’s example and love him through the tough stuff.”
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Josh Stringer/AMC
In reality, Hilarie’s life with Jeffrey and their two kids is far less dramatic. When their son was in preschool, the couple decided to set roots as a growing family in Upstate New York and ultimately build their home on a farm. “We rescue animals and we got tons of chickens and ducks and cows and llamas and an emu and a donkey that are in love. We have got a really large vegetable garden that we definitely expanded on during quarantine and our son just turned eleven and our daughter is three and they are fully onboard with getting involved in there.”
Following the unexpected death of their local family friend Ira Gutner, Hilarie and Jeffrey decided to become co-owners of Samuel’s Sweet Shop to keep Ira’s storefront from closing, with the help of a handful of nearby friends, including another familiar face, actor Paul Rudd. “It has been such a wonderful experience for our kids because they all know what their first job is going to be,” Hilarie adds. “It has been fun for our community because we have been able to use it as the trophy case for all our food artists in town. During quarantine, when you can’t celebrate with the people you love, we hired all new people and created a new space to do gift baskets. It was so wonderful that our community and people from all over the country were supporting a small business, because we know what lockdown did to those this year.”
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AMC
Last May, in the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, Hilarie published her memoir The Rural Diaries: Love, Livestock and Big Life Lessons Down on Mischief Farm . In the book, which she says is meant to be a love letter to her husband, her community and her children, Hilarie very openly discusses the miscarriages she endured and says she did not expect so many people to connect with her story over the past year. “This has been a book that people have gifted their friends or their loved ones during a really difficult time. For me, the responsibility of being a voice for people who have felt like they needed to keep miscarriages or infertility a secret, I’m very serious about it. I never want to cheapen that for anyone because I know how terrible it is to fall asleep at night devastated.” Hilarie is currently writing a second book, which she hopes to have done by next year.
Even as new projects continue to pop up for Hilarie, her nostalgic fan-favorite projects from yesteryear also seem to have the possibility of returning in some capacity. When discussing her role as Sara Ellis on the stylish con artist series White Collar and her commitment to finding a way to work with that cast family again through a revival series or simply together on a new project, Hilarie says, “We’re going to get the band back together, hell or high water. We love each other.”
Hilarie’s six seasons starring as Peyton Sawyer on the hit drama series One Tree Hill has led to her having a substantially large and vocal fanbase for nearly two decades now . “Peyton was the Negan of One Tree Hill because there are people who really hated her and then there were people who really loved how messy she was. Those are the characters that I have always been drawn to, which is probably why I am so defensive of my husband’s character. I love Peyton Sawyer. I put so much of my real self into that character and really fought for her a lot behind the scenes.” When reflecting on the longevity of this series that ran from 2003-2012, Hilarie has noticed the loyal One Tree Hill fan community growing larger and larger as time goes on, as younger generations are now experiencing the series for the very first time through the in-demand world of video streaming. “It’s going to be weird when my son or my daughter comes of age and has to reckon with all the dumb stuff their mother did in her early twenties because it’s there forever,” Hilarie jokes.
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FilmMagic
When referencing her One Tree Hill co-stars, which include Sophia Bush, Bethany Joy Lenz, James Lafferty and Chad Michael Murray, Hilarie says, “Those are going to be the people that I’m close with forever. Those are the people who were with me when I was most unsure about myself and we’ve all seen each other fall in love and break up and been through it. All of those life experiences matter, now that we are almost twenty years later and we’ll love each other forever. We’re always scheming on how to continue to work together.” When hoping Hilarie will elaborate further with any hints for fans, she responds, “I will say that the girls in particular are very, very close. We went through a lot together on that show and we evolved together on that show and so we may have some things in the works that we will be excited to promote later this summer.”
As Hilarie strives to make time for her new and revisited projects, she is consistently striving to make her family’s schedules work as one. “We definitely take turns. Jeffrey’s Walking Dead schedule is obviously the thing that takes precedent. So if I can maintain my side hustles around that (laughs) . The kids’ school year is a big deal for us and what has been really lovely is that in the time we have lived in the Hudson Valley, the film community there has really blossomed. Everything is about making it work for the family and I think once you have that as your center point, it makes every other decision that rolls around it very easy.”
Hilarie wrapped up our conversation thinking about other women in the world right now that have to juggle many responsibilities at once during this life-altering era of the pandemic. “For me, the struggle is always between being a good mom and working and quarantine pulled so many women out of the workforce. When I see those numbers of the amount of women that had to leave work to be able to take care of their children because schools were closed and because we didn’t know what this virus was going to do, that’s heartbreaking. Being able to be a working mother from home and take my kids to school and take them to dance class and write my book and produce movies is something I don’t take for granted at all. I want a shine a light on all the women who are doing it. Homeschool and working and cooking dinner and cleaning the house and just all of it. You’re never good enough. So for the women who out there trying their absolute best, I just want you to know you’re good enough and you’ve kicked ass and your kids are going to be great and they saw how much you cared and how hard you worked and that’s important.”
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SNS Summer Week 2017 Day 5 Prompt: Family
Title: A Day in the Life Alternate Link: AO3
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Dark, bleary eyes slowly opened to the dimly lit room.  It was oddly quiet this morning.  Was something wrong?  Pft, of course that would be his first thought.. Traces of a dream he couldn’t quite recall flickered on the outskirts of his memory, before disappearing completely as the sound of the glass door being slid open echoed throughout the near-silent room. A shock of blond hair appeared, dull in the first traces of morning light that seeped through the doorway.  Blue eyes turned to catch his, widening. “Sasuke?  I’m sorry – did I wake you?”  He whispered, as if the man he addressed might not actually be awake. “What time is it?”  The raven murmured, raising a hand up from beneath the warm covers to brush back a lock of hair that had stuck to his forehead sometime throughout the night. “Mmm, prolly a quarter past 6?”  The blond hummed, quietly shutting the door behind him as he made his way back towards the bed, where Sasuke had pushed himself to a half-sitting position. “The alarm didn’t go off..”  He frowned, his eyes trailing towards the traitorous object sitting on their bed stand. “I turned it off.”  Naruto quickly intervened, preventing the clock’s early demise at the hands of the Uchiha.  “Thought I’d let you get a little extra sleep while you could.”  He smiled softly, scratching the back of his head. It wasn’t like the raven to sleep in though.  Even if his alarm hadn’t gone off, it was only a short matter of time until his internal alarm would go off instead, telling him to wake up for the day.  There wasn’t really much around that.  Before he had a chance to tell the other that it wasn’t necessary, there was a loud slam of a door heard from down the hallway. “Ah, one of ‘em’s up already.”  The Hokage just chuckled, moving to stand from his previous seat on the side of the bed, the mattress becoming lighter as he stood. “I should probably go get breakfast started.”  He leaned over, planting a quick kiss to Sasuke’s temple before making his way towards the bedroom door.  Sasuke just hmm’d in response, pulling himself from the warm bed and making his way to the attached bathroom.  In the hallway, he could hear his husband quietly scolding whom he assumed was their youngest child, who had a bad habit of being unnecessarily noisy - a trait clearly taken from their equally unnecessarily noisy father. Taking his time, the recently ex-Anbu captain went about relieving himself before brushing his teeth and washing his face for the day.  He’d been easily less than 10 minutes, but by the time he’d exited the bathroom, traces of sunlight were already beginning to seep through the balcony door, the soft glow illuminating the cool, hardwood floor of the bedroom. No sooner than was he dressed, his bedroom door slid open, a bright tuft of orange hair, nearly matching his father’s in intensity, stuck its way in.  Cool blue eyes met his almost immediately, and he couldn’t resist the soft smile that melted across his features “You didn’t knock.”  He reminded, and his son quickly apologized.  He knew his kids were pretty good at this, but often let their guards down when they knew their parents weren’t in the same room together.  Still, manners. “Haha says it’s time for breakfast.”  His thumb immediately went to his mouth, something the boy had been growing out of, but still did when he became nervous. “Don’t let him hear you call him that.”  Sasuke nodded, moving to the door where his son moved aside for him.  He leaned down, gently knocking the red-head’s hand away before kissing his head.  “Don’t suck your thumb.” “I’m nooot.”  The boy fussed, pulling away and quickly turning to trot back down the hall, just slow enough so that his father couldn’t fault him for running inside as well. Amused, the eldest Uchiha followed him, pleasantly assaulted by the smell of food as he entered the bustling kitchen - the heart of their home.  Yuki was at the counter, helping Naruto with the finishing touches of breakfast, while his youngest son hustled over to plop down next to his twin, who was already patiently seated at the table. “Don’t break the furniture, Kyou.”  The blond spoke, never missing a beat as he quickly poured egg over steaming bowls of rice, handing them one at a time to Yuki, who helped carry them to the table. “It’s not broken.”  Kyousuke countered, sticking out his tongue at his dad’s back. “It will be if you keep jumping on it like that.”  Sasuke shot him a glance before taking his seat at the end of the table, conveniently placed right next to his rambunctious three-year-old. Kyousuke pouted, but quieted down once his food was set in front of him.  “Itadakimasu~” He sing-songed, digging into his meal.  Yuki finished setting the table and climbed around to his seat on the opposite end of the bench that rounded out their breakfast nook.  Naruto poured tea into small cups set around the table, save for Kyou’s place, where he’d already set a cup of juice. “Coffee?”  Sasuke asked, and Naruto just smiled, a cup already appearing in his hand.  “Gotcha covered.”  The raven smiled in thanks, sipping it and humming his pleasure as he noted the fresh lemon in it.  His dobe seemed to always know when he needed the black stuff. Naruto sat down at the table last, a small gap between him and Yuki on the bench as they all began to eat. “Where’s Ayumi?”  He asked, a dark brow raising curiously at said missing resident. “Ah, she left early with her friends.”  Naruto spoke after chewing his food - a lesson he’d been forced to abide by since having kids, much to his chagrin. “This early?  Did she eat?”  He frowned, glancing at the clock that hung on the kitchen wall, noting that classes didn’t start for at least another 45 minutes, and the academy was only a 15 minute walk, tops. Naruto just waved his hand.  “She had some toast, no worries.  You know how she’s been - it’s fine.” “She should have at least waited to walk with her brother.”  Sasuke frowned, motioning his head towards Yuki, who sat across from him. “I can walk by myself.”  Yuki piped in, looking up from his tea. “I know you can; that’s not the point.” “I don’t mind.” “I know, but your older sibling should take care of you.” “I don’t need taking care of - I’m safe, I promise.” Sasuke sighed.  It wasn’t like Yuki to talk back, but he knew he was only trying to reassure him.  It wasn’t so much his safety he was concerned about, so much as it was that Yuki might feel left out. “I know you are.  I trust you most to be safe.”  He praised, letting their middle child know he wasn’t upset with him.  The white-haired boy smiled at that. “Why do you trust him most?”  Kyou looked up from his half eaten food. “Because your brother is very mature for his age.”  Naruto chimed in, leaning over the small table to wipe the rice from his face.  “Be neater with your food.” “You’re one to talk, dobe.”  Sasuke smirked before taking a bite of the leftover veggies they’d had from last night’s dinner. “Hey!  I’m not messy!” “Mhm.” “I’m not!” “. . .” “Teme, I--” “Can I have soy sauce?” Black and blue eyes immediately looked over to their second youngest son, who had been quiet up to this point. “Sure, Katsu.”  Naruto immediately smiled warmly before standing to fetch it.  Sasuke inwardly questioned if the boy had only intervened to avoid conflict, seeing as he didn’t typically like salty things.  Katsutoshi was a clever one, and he smiled at him, the boy only shyly looking down before the blond returned. “Want me to pour it for you?”  Naruto offered, and Katsutoshi quickly nodded.  There had been a few soy sauce disasters in the house, and his dad knew he didn’t like it very much to begin with.  The blond helped drizzled a small amount over his rice before setting the brown liquid aside. “Baby.”  Kyousuke elbowed his twin.  “I could pour my own soy sauce.” “Don’t tease your brother.”  Sasuke swatted his hand, causing the boy to huff dramatically. “It’s not my fault he can’t even pour his own sauce!” “I can to.”  Katsu countered. “Then why’d you have Haha do it?” “Kyousuke, don’t call me that.”  Naruto intervened. “Sorry.” There was a brief moment of silence as the twins spaced themselves apart on the bench, eyeing one another. “I’m done.  Thanks for the food.”  Yuki announced, not waiting for Naruto to get up before taking his now empty bowl and sliding under the table.  Moving over to the sink, he went about washing the few dishes used for prepping breakfast that morning.  It was Tuesday, and Ayumi and Yuki typically took turns throughout the week doing the dishes, save for Sundays where Naruto and Sasuke would switch off. “Do you want me to walk you to school?”  Sasuke offered, also moving to stand, taking his bowl and plate over to the sink. “That’s okay.”  Yuki shook his head. The Uchiha stared a moment longer, but said nothing else. Naruto and the twins took their time eating, and Sasuke offered to finish the rest of the dishes so he could head to class. “I’m off!”  Yuki shouted over his shoulder. “Have a good day.”  Naruto and Sasuke mirrored. No sooner had the door closed - “When can I go to the academy?”  Kyou chirped, wriggling in his seat. “When you’re older.”  Sasuke spoke as he cleared the counter.  “Finish your food.” Kyousuke stilled, going back to eating his breakfast.  Two bites later, he looked up again. “How long is that?” “When you’re tall enough to wash the dishes by yourself.”  Naruto chuckled, standing now and adding his dish to the sink where Sasuke stood before fetching himself another glass of tea. “Tomorrow?” “You don’t grow that fast, stupid.”  Katsu chided. “You don’t know that!” “Don’t fuss you two.  Katsutoshi, don’t tease your brother.  Kyousuke, you can check again tomorrow if you’re tall enough if you’d like.”  Naruto moved over to stand next to the table, a cloth in hand. The boys both nodded in sync.  “Okay.” “Are you done eating?”  The blond motioned to their bowls. “I’m done.”  Kyou nodded, sliding down from his seat. “Take your bowl to your father if you’re done.”  He reminded the boy, thwarting his attempt to escape. “Okaaay.” “Can I save mine?”  Katsu frowned, his chopsticks pressing the rice around in his bowl awkwardly. “Are you not hungry?” He shook his head, red bangs swaying in his face.  “Uh uh.” “Okay.  Make sure to finish the rest at lunch, okay?” “Okay.” The Hokage took his bowl, setting it on the counter and placing wrap over it for later. “Can I go play now?”  The youngest boy tugged at his pants leg. The blond tilted his head towards the cloth he’d left on the table.  “Wipe down the table and then you can go play.” “Okay~”  He quickly went over to the table, where Katsu was excusing himself. “Don’t miss anything.” “Okayyy.” Naruto just chuckled at his youngest’s response, ruffling his wily orange locks. “You should be get heading out too.”  Sasuke spoke, wiping his hands dry on a dish towel now that he’d finished up the rest of the dishes. The blond just groaned, mumbling “yes, yes” under his breath. Sasuke smirked, sneaking a peck onto Naruto’s whiskered cheek. Kyousuke made a noise, sticking his tongue out at his parents’ antics, but neither of them paid him any mind.  Katsutoshi had already wandered off, likely to play with his toys in the living area. “Think you can handle the twins while I’m gone?” “I think I can manage until you get home for lunch.”  Sasuke rolled his eyes.  “Who’s dropping them off at Sakura’s today?” “Mm, I can do it.  I had to talk to Lee anyways!”  Naruto chirped, heading over the grab his cloak where it hung by the door. “I’m leaving now!”  He called over his shoulder. “Be safe!” A trio of voices called after him, and he couldn’t help that smile that spread across his face. Sasuke made eye contact with him once more, the two speaking in their own unspoken language.  They communicated with each other in a way that transcended words, in a way only they could. This was just another morning.  Another day in the life. Neither of them would have it any other way.
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kailasquires · 6 years
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In Case You Missed It...2017 In a Nutshell
In 2017 I pulled a bit of a Disappearing Act, and deactivated most of my online and social media presence, which was already pretty limited to begin with. This was somewhat of a cleanse for me, as I gave up drinking alcohol and deleted my Instagram account for the entire year, and deactivated my Facebook for a large part of the year. I must say that life without drinking and excessive social media browsing has forced me to engage in alot more self-reflection and for that reason I’ve decided to re-introduce my blog. I tend to be a pretty private individual, but for my final activity in 2017 I wanted to be open and vulnerable.
There’s no real topic for this post, but it’s centered around personal life, career, faith and relationships. Instead of simply boring you with a long monologue, I’ve chosen to create a list of 50 things I experienced, learned or appreciated this year. I hope you enjoy. 
Top 50 List of 2017
1. There’s power in the tongue. Start speaking things into existence ! 2. Time is of the essence, so live your best life while you’re still alive 3. That being said, don’t try to rush things. God willing we have 70+ years on this Earth, and that’s a lot of time to fill with love, laughs, accomplishments, failures and new experiences 4. My year sober taught me to be bold, shoot my shot and take the things I wanted in life. Lesson Learned: If you need help with something, don’t hesitate to ask. If you want something, Go GET IT!  5. Don’t ever rely on another person for your happiness. If you haven’t found your happy place whilst being alone, that just means you haven’t spent enough quality time with yourself 6. My brother wins Dad of the year, and I’ll fight anyone on that 7. I love to receive and give feedback. If we’re not constantly improving ourselves, what’s the point of living? 8. Jesus was a servant, spreading love and salvation to all. In the end, The Word of God will ultimately judge us, so I’m making sure I’m aligned with His Word  9. The way to my heart is comedy and food 10. Maggie is one of the most resilient people I know. Keep shining SB!  11. Applying to business school was one of the most arduous, mentally draining and stressful processes of my life, but I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat :-) 12. Child rearing/parenting is one of the greatest responsibilities a person can undertake, and it often goes unappreciated or unnoticed. No parent is perfect, but it’s important to still say thanks to the ones who raised you. THANK YOU MOM & DAD!!! You did an incredible job with my brother & I  13. If a person de-prioritizes you, don’t get angry or question why. Instead respect their decision and repurpose your efforts elsewhere 14. MLT  is one of the greatest organizations I’ve ever been a part of. My MBA prep class is filled with impressively talented, accomplished and fun black and brown folks. I’m forever grateful for the experience I’ve had with you amazing people #BosslandAwaits #CoachJTaughtMe 15. I dated a man with whom things just seemed to click naturally. He was honest, funny, caring, and NOT petty(lol). I believe we both brought out a side of each other that those around us had never seen, and for that I’m thankful. Although this kind of puppy love is exciting and heart-warming it is often times short-lived 16. Chance the Rapper was my favorite artist of the year. He has a God given talent and I pray he never stops shining his light    17. Noise canceling headphones are the best thing to ever happen to a New Yorker who enjoys a quiet commute to and from work. #ThankYouBose 18. I believe in every single one of my friends wholeheartedly and am proud to say that I’m surrounded by incredible people who I am 100% certain will be the industry leaders of tomorrow #WholeTeamWinning 19. Fellas..When I love, I love DEEP and can be a bit crazy at times. Enter at your own risk. *evil smile* 20. But I’m hella fun and you’d have amazing life experiences with me lol 21. I should’ve bought Bitcoins back in the day when I kept telling people to invest. Note to self: Heed your own advice  22. Emotional Labor is real 23. Black women are Dope! 24. People who don’t fit the description in the above comment should NOT take offense to that. I’m sure you’re all amazing as well, I just think that this group of individuals needs to hear it more often. 25. When Isi tells you to wear a life jacket, DO IT!!! Thanks again for saving me from drowning off the coast of San Andres into the Caribbean Sea :-*  26. 🗣Life is too short to waste time dealing with fickle people  27. This scripture single-handedly helped me fight against all the angst I felt while applying to business schools:  “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” - Philippians 4: 6-7 28. I find it terribly rude when people don’t return phone calls or texts. Like I know you saw my message, the least you could do is say “ok” lol.  #PetPeeves 29. I held up an Uhaul distribution center over a disagreement and went on a twitter rant the next morning; Probably the most gangsta moment of my life, and a great showcase of my millennial sense of entitlement #SorryNotSorry 30. Everyone should engage in the self reflective, soul searching elements of the business school application process: it’s always necessary to press pause on life and take an inventory on where you are and where you say you’d like to be in the future  31. Bikram yoga was one of my favorite practices of the year. I always left feeling empowered and rejuvenated 32. I find inspiration in almost everyone I come in contact with. I’m amazed by people’s stories and wish we could publicly recognize everyday people more often. Low key, I wish I could meet every person in the world.  33. In hindsight, not getting my promotion at work in 2016 was the wake up call I needed to grab a hold of my life 34. I would love to work for Bain & Company in 2 years #SpeakingItIntoExistence 35. All Men Are Trash!!!!!!! 36. Good guys of the world, don’t take offense to the previous statement but with the rise of this #MeToo movement it’s become so apparent how many men impose their hypermasculinity upon us women (ie. inappropriate touching, unsolicited peen pics, street harassment etc.)  37. Barbados might actually be paradise, and it took me 26 years and a vacation with my friend to realize it. Moral of the story: some of the greatest treasures in life might be right in front of your eyes, you just need the right circumstance to help you see it  38. I love to see people smiling and enjoying nice hardy laughs 39. I tried Ramen for the first time this year and it blew my mind!!!! Gotta go to Japan ASAP! 40. Never trust when a man says “I can’t” because when he says I can’t, he ain’t a man. Okay maybe I stole this from Love & Basketball, but I’ve learned it’s so true though! lol   41. I want my next relationship to be God-centered. Period 42. Moving to Harlem has been incredible!! I love the culture, communal harmony and overall liveliness of the area. I can only imagine what the place was like during the Harlem Renaissance #RespectTheCulture 43. This year I limited my traveling to save money and focus on the GMAT, but I still was able to sneak in a few new cities: Budapest(Hungary), Salzbergen(Germany),Medellin(Colombia), Albuquerque, Tulsa and Greenville!  44. One of the best things about moving back to NY is being able to minister  at my home church again, as the resident saxophonist. I feel so much more fulfilled on Sunday mornings 45. This year i was determined to rid myself of gossip, idle talk, & foul language. I’m hoping to speak peace and prosperity into people’s life from now on #BuildingABetterMe 46. In a relationship, “women cannot go backwards in lifestyle” . Chris Rock taught me… 47. God has been too good to me to just sit on my gifts and talents. Laziness is far from Godliness. Disclaimer: This is not a direct quote from the Bible, just my own interpretation haha 48. This year I tried to be very intentional about the words I speak to myself and others. These days I find it’s so easy to say empty words, make & break promises and to be a “yes woman”. I’m hoping to be more genuine and true to my heart from now on 49. I’ve tried dating apps for a bit this year, and still think there’s nothing like meeting someone organically in a cafe or at a nice bashment. However, I can say there are some gems that are so hidden that you need to mine for them electronically ;-) #CoffeeMeetsBagel 50. By God’s Grace I was accepted into all 3 business schools that I applied to. Next year I’ll either be moving to Boston, Philly or Chicago. See you later NYC, I’ll be back in no time :) #WontHeDoIT
Thanks for listening. Peace n Love 
Kaila
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How To Sell teacher.
That Else Wants To Appreciate instructor.
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katherinemoller-blog · 13 years
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My father…
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I write this post under the saddest of circumstances. My father passed away on Monday night. We had just had a family picnic and were sitting down to have drinks…
So, here is Wednesday, and what do I have to say for myself. Well, my father and I were very close. We always were! Thick as thieves for the past 33 years. My father was a professor of biology at UNB for many years (from 1972 until he retired), but music was always one of the things that we shared. I started playing the violin when I was six because he played the violin around the house. My older brother had also started lessons, and I wanted to join in. One of my favourite photos from my childhood was of me standing on the footstool moving the pistons on Dad’s tuba while he played. This goes back a long time! Other than music, we shared a love of the outdoors and of the water.
As mentioned, my father was a prof. He loved his work and did a great job at it. He had a reputation for being tough… no bird courses with him, but he was fair and always aided those who seeked help. At the end of his career he was in essence a guidance councilor to undergraduate students on top of his regular teaching assignments. A dedicated man who caught the 6:30am bus to work… A man who prepped all of his lectures the morning of… The man who never had lecture notes for students to copy…. It was all in his head!
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We played music together from the time that I started playing the violin… Violin duets, fiddle duets, tuba/violin duets, and, of course, family fun… This meant that every Sunday night the whole family (me on violin, my mother on clarinet, my brother on viola, and my father on tuba) would play music together. Classical, Broadway, Australian Drinking Songs… This was a tradition that we continued every Christmas eve right up until the last Christmas. If he and I were in the same house, there was always music!
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Recently (five years ago) I had started both a fiddle group and an amateur baroque music string ensemble, and my father joined both. The fiddle group was really more to be with me and my mom as the music was no challenge for him, but the early music group was something that made him push himself and work on the violin more than usual.
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My father ran the Fredericton International TubaFest. This is a two-day event to which he invited usually at least three clinicians and a pianist and at which we usually had 15-20 participants. The last one he ran in 2011 was our 8th year. One of our clinicians had passed away (John Griffiths) and we had a memorial to him during our 7th annual event. Mom and I are thinking of running the event one final time in 2012 as a memorial to Dad. My father had been attending tuba conferences around the continent and had decided to hold one in our hometown. He was dedicated enough to this event to take it on singlehanded and to be willing to bankroll it if necessary. It never came to that, but he would have been willing.
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So, what else can I tell you about my father. He loved to travel, and instilled that love in me early on! During my childhood we lived in New Zealand twice and Texas once. We drove across Canada in a van one summer and drove down to Texas the year we lived there. We traveled to Hawaii and Puerto Rico as well. Since I moved out, my parents have also lived in Australia and British Columbia. I made the trip to visit both times.
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My father passed way during a family vacation to Maine. My family owns a small island on a lake in Southern Maine where my aunt and uncle reside during the summer. This island is where my father spent his summers as a child. He loved the water… Loved being in it and on it, a love that I share. We have enjoyed many an early morning paddle on the lake before the wind picked up and before most everyone else was awake… that magical time when the water is still warmer than the air and there is mist rising off of it.
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My uncle read a letter to us this visit that his mother had written in which it mentioned that my father had just come in with yet more fish, and that he had been called off of the lake to come do his chores. It is a nice circular situation that led my father back to the place of his childhood for his death.
My father had been short of breath for a few days and was going to visit the doctor upon our return to get everything checked out. He did not want to miss this vacation. We had a really good day on Monday with him coming for a swim with us. He had actually commented on how good he felt that morning, and he seemed to have a bit more of a spark in his eye. Mom and I had gone for a canoe and picked some blueberries as well. In the evening we had a cook-out with hamburgers, chips and dip, and then were settling in to evening drinks when my father’s breathing became very laboured and he essentially lost consciousness for a couple of minutes. As we were in the process of calling 911, he came to. He wasn’t sure why we were all panicking and wanted to know what was wrong. We told him what had happened and that we were taking him to the hospital. We only got him part way to the boat to shore before he collapsed. He never made it to the hospital.
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There are lots of good things about this story. My father was well right up to his death. He was able to come on vacation with us one last time to his childhood summer home, a place that he loved! He felt pretty good and was able to participate in the activities of the day, although he did feel tired. He got to visit with my brother, his wife and children just last month. I was here with my mother, and she was surrounded with family.
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Also, my father had that one final lucid moment with us… He didn’t understand why we were panicking. I asked him to raised his arms, speak a sentence, and my aunt got him to stick out his tongue. He did everything we requested, although when he stuck out his tongue, he did wave it around a bit and roll it up just to poke fun at us for our worry. I will always remember that moment!
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So many fond memories of my father… When I was in high school we went to the Gaelic College in St. Anne’s, Cape Breton together to study fiddling. He and I were in all of the same classes, sat next to each other, and were generally considered to be trouble. Also in high school he and I shared a music stand in the local community orchestra. We were enough trouble there that I was moved to first violin while he was kept on second violin. We still managed to sit next to each other and cause trouble! My father lived a great life, and if he were here, it seems to me that he should have no regrets. He and my mother traveled a lot, and traveled even more after he was retired. Just last winter they drove to Arkansas to visit my aunt, went to Nashville, Branson, Arlington… The spent a month and a half traveling around. They still had plans for places to go, but were not putting anything off for later. A full life with more dreams left. I feel lucky that my parents were still planning. They were not in a home, they were not incapacitated in anyway… My father in essence died the way that most of us hope to: quickly, painlessly, after a great day, and surrounded by family. Also, my mother has been left with lots of support! It will of course be hard, but there are still lots of us around to help out!
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RIP Richard T. Riding, born Jan 6, 1943, died August 1st, 2011.
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