#you’d think lloyd would be the responsible one but actually it’s none of them

[mossghosst]

diaster cousin scribbles. no one gets them like i do

#they are so family to me #listen #not ship #don’t tag as ship #you’d think lloyd would be the responsible one but actually it’s none of them #morro is the oldest and therefore just doesn’t wanna deal w most of their bullshit #they rope him into shenanigans anyway though #ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago fanart #lego ninjago fanart #morro wu #morro #ninjago morro #lloyd garmadon #harumi jade #harumi ninjago #ninjago harumi #mossghosstdoodles

[rosiehunterwolf]

@fabro-de-omres HOLD UP BESTIE, I GOT ONE LAST FIC FOR YOUR LIST-

Star-Ninja!

Prompts: Siblings and Competition

Word Count: 5,884

Characters: The ninja

Timeline: Snapshots throughout the series

Trigger Warnings: None

Summary: What happens when the loveable gremlin the ninja adopted off of the streets introduces them to Starfarer comics?

Chaos ensues, of course.

Read on FFN.net

Read on Ao3

Tumblr work under the cut

“Take that! And that! Oh, yeah-” Jay leaped to his feet, grinning. “Die, lava zombies, die!”

Level complete. The words flashed across the screen, and Jay whooped. Only one more level and he would beat Zane’s high score.

“You could’ve beaten it faster if you had taken out the little guys first.”

Jay whipped around to see the little wispy-haired kid draped over the arm of the couch, staring at the TV screen with a glazed, listless look in his eyes.

“What are you doing here?” Jay snapped.

“I’m borrrred,” he whined, kicking his legs against the couch. “Can I play with you?”

“No.”

“Can I use the training course?”

“No, you’re not a ninja.”

“Then what am I supposed to do?”

“It’s not our job to entertain you, kid.”

“I didn’t ask to be kidnapped by you,” Lloyd snapped.

Jay felt his face flush. “So you’d rather still be with the Serpentine?”

“Well no, I just wanna have a choice!”

Jay stared at him for a moment. I don’t know his whole story. He’s a kid who’s been dealt a bad hand in life. He exhaled slowly. “Look, Lloyd, you’re just a kid. I know it’s hard for you to understand- but you’ve caused a lot of trouble. The Serpentine are dangerous, and you don’t know enough to deal with them. You just gotta trust us, okay?”

Lloyd sighed dramatically, sliding off of the couch and onto the floor. “Yeah, whatever.”

Jay rolled his eyes. “Can’t you find something to do for a little while? Please? I’ll talk with Sensei about what we’re going to do with you as soon as he gets back.”

To his surprise, Lloyd actually left him alone, and Jay turned back to his game. He knew it wasn’t a very responsible move, but he had never agreed to babysit the kid. Besides, they were going hunting for Serpentine again tomorrow, so it would likely be Jay’s last chance to have some downtime for an entire week.

By the time Jay had finally beaten the top score, his fingers were sore from playing. Flopping onto the couch, he glanced up at the clock. It had been an hour since he had sent Lloyd off, and he hadn’t heard so much as a peep from the kid.

Jay had only known him for a couple of days, but already that seemed like suspicious behavior.

He headed into the storage room that Sensei had scrapped together into a makeshift bedroom for his nephew. Lloyd was sprawled across his mattress, reading a book.

I guess he’s not up to anything. I shouldn’t have been so quick to judge him. Jay turned to leave before stopping suddenly and whirling back around.

“Hey!” he yanked the book out of Lloyd’s hands. “Is this a Starfarer comic? Have you been snooping around in my room?”

“No! I haven’t touched your stupid stuff. Figures, the one time I actually didn’t do anything wrong, you blame me.”

“Have you not heard of The Boy who Cried Wolf?” “What?”

“Nevermind.” Jay examined the comic. It was an old edition, but not one he owned. Besides, the cover was wrinkled and there were dog ears on several pages. Jay would never treat his comics so harshly. “If it’s not mine, then whose is it?”

“It’s mine. Is it so hard to believe that I don’t steal everything?’

“No, I mean, you like Starfarer?”

“Of cou- I, uh, I mean, Starfarer’s for babies, ha. I’m only reading this because it’s the only book I have and you wouldn’t give me anything else to do.”

“Oh, that’s too bad. I guess I’ll have to go enjoy my Starfarer comic collection on my own, then. Since it’s too babyish for big kids like you.”

“Your what?” Lloyd was suddenly sticking to him like a barnacle. “You collect Starfarer comics?”

“Not just comics.” He grinned as he watched Lloyd’s eyes widen. “Movies, posters, action figures- you name it.”

“No way! Can I see? Please, please? Just for a second-” Jay put a hand on his shoulder, holding him back. “Hang on, kiddo. I thought Starfarer was for babies?”

Lloyd shifted on his feet. “Well, I didn’t really mean that, I just- I was just testing you!”

Jay raised an eyebrow, smothering a laugh. “Uh huh. If you’re such a master, why aren’t you reading the new comics?”

Lloyd looked down, shuffling his feet. “I… this is the newest one I have. We didn’t really get many opportunities to buy what we wanted at Darkley’s. Especially not a book about superheroes. Because we were super busy being evil and stuff, heh.”

Jay felt his heart twist. Am I really pitying Lloyd Garmadon right now just because of some comics?

Although, when he looked at Lloyd now, he didn’t see the annoying, mischievous son of a villain. He saw a wide-eyed, naive kid looking at Jay with such hope that it was hard not to feel a strong urge to protect him from the burdens of the world.

Jay crouched down next to him. “Y’know what? I’ll show you my newer comics. You can even keep some, if you like.”

“Really? You’re not messing with me?”

“As long as you promise not to treat them like that.” Jay gestured towards the wrinkled comic. “Seriously, dude, you better go wash your grubby little hands before I even let you within five feet of my stuff.”

Jay didn’t think he’d ever seen Lloyd be in such a hurry to do anything.

---

“What’s this do?”

Nya snatched Lloyd’s hand away from the control panel. “Don’t touch that!”

“But what about-”

“Or that! Just-” She took a deep breath, running her fingers through her hair. “Don’t touch anything unless I specifically tell you to, okay?”

“Well, then what am I supposed to do?”

“I don’t know, find something. I’m not here to babysit you, Lloyd, I’m managing the comms. It’s important to make sure we stay in touch with the guys when they are on their mission.”

“I don’t need a babysitter,” he huffed. “Why couldn’t they take me with them? I am a ninja now. I could’ve bashed in some Serpentine heads!”

Nya glanced at him, glaring defiantly in his oversized gi. “I’d hardly call you a ninja, squirt. You haven’t even grown into that gi yet.”

“Yes, I have! See, it fits me perfectly!”

“...Lloyd, those pant legs almost completely cover your shoes.”

“They do not! Uncle Wu said I was a ninja.”

“A ninja in training, at best,” Nya corrected.

“What’s the use of being the green ninja if I don’t get anything fun out of it?”

“One day, green machine. You just have to be patient.”

He groaned loudly, flopping onto the chair. “I hate being patient.”

“No! You? Impatient? Who would’ve guessed?”

“Can’t you at least show me how to turn on the alarms?”

“No. Alarms are for emergencies only.”

“It is an emergency! I’m going to die of boredom!”

“Fine,” Nya relented. “What do I have to do to get you to leave me alone- and stay out of trouble? Can I rent you a movie?”

“Ooh, can I watch Zombies: Back for Revenge? Or Ghost Story? Or Dawn of Destruction?”

“Nope, nope, and nope. Too scary, too mature, too violent. Pick something more family-friendly, Lloyd.”

He pouted. “Kai got to watch those movies.”

“Yeah, well, Kai’s older than you and is responsible for his own actions. If you watch those, you’ll be up all night with nightmares and Sensei will never trust me again.”

“I won’t have nightmares! He’ll never know! Please, Nya.”

“No. End of discussion. Pick something else or nothing at all. Remember, it’s my money paying for the movie here. What about those… space wars movies you love?”

“It’s Starfarer,” Lloyd snapped, although his expression looked considerably lighter. “There’s one I haven’t seen yet…”

After Lloyd showed her the movie and she paid for it, Nya turned back to the control panel and checked for messages from the guys. Still nothing.

She really hated when they left her in the dark like that.

There were sounds of explosions from behind her, and a cheer from Lloyd- she glanced over her shoulder to see him grinning gleefully at the screen as the main characters blew something up. She shook her head- what was it with young boys and explosions?- but she couldn’t stop a smile from creeping onto her face. Glancing over at the comms, she double-checked that no one had said anything.

The guys obviously weren’t taking the effort to communicate with her. It wouldn’t hurt to take a quick break.

Sitting down next to Lloyd, she focused her attention on the movie. It seemed nonsensical and boring at first, but after a bit, Lloyd started explaining things to her, and, to her surprise, she found herself happy to listen. As it got later, his talking slowed, and at some point- Nya couldn’t quite identify when- Lloyd was leaning against her side, snuggling with their shared blanket.

Nya watched him carefully. She hadn’t cuddled with anyone like this since she had been younger, with Kai- but then, she had been the younger one, the one being protected. Now, she was experiencing what she imagined Kai must’ve felt, and despite how annoying he could be, Nya felt a strong urge to pull him close and never let him go.

She understood their reluctance to let Lloyd fight fully now. She didn’t want to ever send him off into battle, especially not the Final Battle.

How could this sweet, stubborn little wisp of a child be the green ninja?

Many hours and three movies later, Nya was afraid to even look at the clock. Rubbing Lloyd’s head, she murmured, “It’s way past your bedtime, kiddo.”

“‘m not tired,'” he mumbled in an obviously tired voice.

“I already let you stay up way later than you should be.”

“Just one more movie!” “Lloyd! These things are two hours long!”

“I promise I’ll go right to bed after!”

“That’s what you said after the last one.”

“Well, I really mean it this time.”

“No way.”

“Please?” Lloyd suddenly looked a lot more nervous, twisting his hands together. “Just… just until we hear something. From the ninja.”

“Oh, Lloyd.” She put a hand on his back. “It’s okay. They’re okay. Most likely, they just forgot to report back. They do that all the time.”

“But we don’t know that.”

“...Yeah. You’re right. We don’t.”

“Is it always this scary? Waiting for them to talk to you, not knowing what’s going on?”

Nya nodded slowly. “Yeah, a lot of the time it is, bud. But eventually, you learn to trust them. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t worry about their safety, but I know they are strong and capable and can take care of themselves.” Lloyd nodded. “That makes sense.”

He still didn’t look quite content with her answer, though. Nya leaned in, murmuring to him.

“Tell you what. What if we watch half of one more movie?”

Man, she was turning into such a disgustingly gross softie for this kid so fast, wasn’t she.

But the wide, genuine smile that split across his face made it worth it.

---

Kai stood in front of the long expanse of bookshelves, stacked with dozens and dozens of comics.

“Excuse me,” Kai gestured to the nearest bookstore employee, and he walked over. “Which part is the Starfarer section?”

The employee blinked at him. “You’re already in it. This entire wall is Starfarer.”

Kai gawked at the wall in utter amazement. There had to be at least a hundred books there. How were these many Starfarer comics even possible?

“Which one is the best one?” he asked the employee.

The man pushed his glasses up his nose, looking increasingly annoyed with Kai’s lack of Starfarer knowledge. “That’s hardly a straightforward question. Starfarer is our most popular franchise, they’re all popular. It’s impossible to pick one book. If you’re looking for our most popular selling comics of all time, that would be volumes 1, 32, 45, and 79. As for comics trending right now, that, of course, would be the most recent ones, 273 through 282. Although volume 13 has seen a sudden influx in readership. If you are looking for those with the best ratings-”

How do I say, ‘which comic is best for my little brother who was just aged up several years, without warning, and I want to help him regain his sense of childhood?’

Deciding this wasn’t going to be helpful, Kai gently dismissed the employee and began looking on his own. He tried to pick out ones with interesting covers, but ended up throwing many of them back after skimming the summaries on the back.

That wasn’t working very well either, and Kai was just about to throw the towel in and grab some random comics and hope for the best- or worse, call Jay and ask for help- when he decided to open one comic to skim it.

This quickly turned into a mistake, because before Kai knew it, five minutes had turned into an hour, and he had completely finished the comic. One comic turned into two, then five. He only was able to yank himself from his reading when he got a text from Zane asking where he was and that dinner was going to be ready soon.

Gathering up a large handful of the comics he had liked, Kai headed back towards the Bounty on his motorbike.

He found Lloyd on his bed, staring up at the ceiling with earbuds in. He pulled them out when he saw Kai, his gaze darting curiously towards the stack of comics.

“I got you these,” Kai said, setting them down next to him. “I know things are… different now, with you being older, but you’re always going to be my little brother. And I wanted you to know that just because you’re physically older doesn’t mean you have to stop doing the things you love. So if you still want to make doodles for our fridge, or make your food into shapes on your plate, or read Starfarer comics, no one’s going to judge you.”

Lloyd picked up a comic, slowly leafing through it. He was quiet for so long that Kai began to worry that he had completely messed something up. But when he finally spoke, he simply said, “You read it.”

“I… what?”

A smile spread across Lloyd’s face. “You read these before you bought them. Didn’t you?”

Kai spluttered. “I- what? That doesn’t make any sense! You have no proof!”

“The pages are creased over here. You always crease back the pages when you have a book. And there’s a slight depression here that shows the presence of fingers. Too big to be Jay’s or Nya’s, and too small to be Zane’s or Cole’s.”

Kai blinked at him. “You pay way too much attention to people, don’t you?”

“Hey, I paid attention during training, y’know!”

“More than we give you credit for, apparently.”

“I just can’t believe I spent all those months trying to pressure you to read Starfarer and you suddenly pick it up when I’m not even forcing you.”

“Shut up.” Kai shoved him gently. “It was a one-time thing. I was only doing it so I could find a comic you would like,”

“Yeah, so it makes sense you would look at them for five hours.”

“How did you- I mean, I didn’t go to the bookstore right away! I was doing other things! I only went there a few minutes before I came home!”

“Oh, yeah?” Lloyd raised an eyebrow. “What ‘other things?’”

“Uh, very important ninja business, like, um… patrol?”

“Cole returned from patrol two hours ago.”

“Well, this was a super-secret different patrol that Cole doesn’t even know about.”

“Really. Does Sensei know?”

“Nope. Just me.”

Lloyd elbowed him playfully. “You’re gonna have to watch all the movies with me now, y’know.”

“No way. Aren’t there like, fifty of those?”

“Twenty-seven.”

“No, thanks.”

“You have to! It’s part of the experience. Wait until I tell Jay you’re into it now.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“You bet I would!” Lloyd looked over at the pile of comics again, examining them more closely. “Nice, these are some good ones. Which ones did you read?”

“Um. The ones I bought?”

Lloyd looked up at him, his grin fading. “But like… not just these, right? You read others? In between them?”

“No… is this supposed to be some sort of poke at me being a slow reader-”

“No! I just can’t believe you read them in this order! Seriously, you couldn’t have gotten it any more wrong! You’ve ruined the whole series for yourself!”

“Oh, that’s such a shame, guess you better not tell Jay, then-”

“Oh, no way, you’re still getting into the fandom. We’re going to fix this. Come look at my comics. We’re going to read them together, and I’m gonna show you how to do it right.”

“Oh, is that Zane calling for dinner-”

“Nice try,” Lloyd smirked. “But you’ve entered the Starfarer fandom now. You’re in it, good and deep. There’s no coming back from this, Kai.”

“Glad to see your psychotic gremlin tendencies weren’t lost in the tea,” Kai grumbled. “Probably the one thing I could’ve gone without.”

---

“Are you out of your mind? The movie adaptions of Starfarer are way better.”

“Okay, there is clearly no hope left for you, Lloyd. The show is far superior to any of the movies.”

“Are you kidding? The budget for the show was so much lower! They just used a bunch of cheap, corny special effects, the movies were much smoother!”

“Visuals aren’t the most important thing, Lloyd. The show had a smaller storyboard team, meaning their ideas were more consistent and developed. The plot is overall much more in-depth in the show, and the extended time also gives them more space to do what they want.”

“It also leaves a lot of space for pointless filler! The movies are more direct. Every scene is important. Whereas I can name half a dozen episodes from the show- and that’s just on the top of my head- that were completely useless and would not change the plot at all if discarded.”

“You’re insane, every filler episode had importance! Some just showed it in smaller ways than others.”

“They could’ve fit the minor details into the other episodes!”

“Yeah, but filler is nice sometimes. Getting some more chill episodes between all the action is good.”

“No way, they’re boring and ruin the pacing. The movies have you on the edge of your seat throughout the whole thing.”

Zane sighed, glancing over at Jay and Lloyd. Their argument was getting increasingly more physical, with each boy attempting to tower over the other- not an easy task, considering they were both short.

“Can you two please be quiet? Or at least take this somewhere else? I’m trying to watch the news to make sure there aren’t any danger reports in Ninjago City.”

Jay suddenly whirled on him. “Zane! That’s it!”

“...What’s it?”

“Zane should decide! Which is better? The Starfarer movies, or the show?” Turning to Lloyd, he added, “Since he’s a nindroid, he’ll be the least biased of all of us.”

“One problem,” Lloyd said. “Zane hasn’t watched either.”

“Well, then, he’ll have to watch them,” Jay shrugged.

Zane glanced back and forth between them. “You want me to watch twenty-seven movies. And all seven seasons of the TV show. Just to help you win a disagreement.”

“It’s actually eight seasons,” Lloyd corrected.

“Exactly!” Jay beamed. “You’ll do great. Get back to us when you’ve watched them all and have formed an opinion. The sooner the better, so that I can prove Lloyd wrong as quickly as possible.”

“Hey! If anything, I’m going to prove you wrong!” “No way! The show-”

“Okay, okay, I’ll do it!” Zane stood up suddenly, putting his hands between them before another argument could break out. “Just stop fighting. Please.”

“You got yourself a deal,” Jay winked.

Two weeks and over a hundred hours of content later, Jay and Lloyd were staring at him expectantly over the dinner table.

“Well? What’s the verdict?”

Zane blinked at them with glassy eyes. “They were both very good. I enjoyed them. However, I feel like I never want to watch a minute of Starfarer ever again.”

“Seriously?” Lloyd fumed. “We waited all this time for him to not even properly answer the question?”

“Who cares about the question?” Cole grumbled. “Zane was so tired from watching your guys’ dumb Starfarer stuff, he messed up the gumbo.” Cole drew a spoon listlessly through the stew. “This is my favorite meal. I’m never forgiving you guys for messing it up.”

“Starfarer isn’t stupid,” Jay and Lloyd cried at once. They blinked at each other, surprised, and Kai and Nya laughed.

“I think that’s the first thing they’ve agreed on all week,” Nya grinned.

“It won’t last,” Kai murmured to her as the green and blue ninja set on Cole for his statement on Starfarer. “I give them two days to find something else to bicker about.”

---

“Hurry, Nya, he’s almost at the navigation!”

“I’m trying!” Nya bit her lip, an iron grip on her video game controller. “He’s sabotaged the security system!”

“No-”

Game over flashed across the screen, and Jay leaped to his feet, cheering. Nya rolled her eyes, tossing down her controller, while Zane, Lloyd, and Kai watched with disappointment.

“I can’t believe he won again,” Kai huffed. “How is he still undefeated? We’ve been playing this game for weeks.”

“I thought you were supposed to be good at this, Lloyd,” Nya grumbled. “You’re the Starfarer expert. You’ve got so many hours logged on here.”

“I’d like to point out that I’ve gotten closer to beating him than any of you have,” he snapped. “The last time I was only seconds away from winning.”

“Yeah, well, close isn’t good enough,” Kai said. “We need to beat him. Otherwise, it will get to his head.”

“Clearly none of us are going to be winning any time soon,” Nya groaned.

“There is someone who hasn’t played against him yet,” Zane mused. “Someone who has a track record of beating Jay’s top scores in games.”

Five gazes drifted towards the chair on the other side of the room. Cole looked up from his book when he realized the others were looking at him. “What do you want this time?”

“You gotta beat Jay in Starfarer: Alien Invasion 3,” Lloyd insisted, at his side immediately. “He’s undefeated. You know how unbearable he gets when he’s cocky.”

Cole blinked slowly up at them. “I don’t know the first thing about Starfarer.”

“I can teach you,” Lloyd begged. “Just do it. Please. Since when have you passed up an opportunity to beat Jay in something?”

Jay grinned. “Admit it, guys, I’ve defeated you. There’s no way Cole will ever win against me.”

Cole stood up abruptly. “Oh yeah? We’ll see about that. Lloyd, give me that controller. Jay’s about to get a serving of humility.”

For what appeared to be just another mundane rendition of a classic monster-fighter game, it surprised Cole to find it was actually much more complex and engaging.

It would’ve actually been really fun, had Jay not been so ridiculously goated at the game.

“What? Your character is invulnerable to the imperial sludge? How is that fair?”

Jay scoffed. “If you had read the Aliens Strike Back arc of Starfarer comics, you would’ve known that.”

“This totally isn’t fair. You have a bunch of background knowledge on Starfarer that I don’t.”

“It’s not our fault you’re the only one who hasn’t read or watched any Starfarer,” Lloyd said.

“Oh no,” Cole groaned. “You guys are dragging me into this too, aren’t you?”

---

“Where’s my copy of issue 117 of Starfarer?”

Jay looked up from the counter, where he was munching on crackers. “Like I would know, Lloyd. It’s not my responsibility to keep track of where you put your stuff.”

“I know exactly where I put it. But it’s gone now! I left it on my nightstand last night, right next to my bed. I haven’t touched it since.”

“Well, evidently, you have, since it’s not there now.”

“No, I didn’t touch it! Someone must’ve moved it!”

“And? I don’t see how this is my problem.”

“Everyone knows you’re the biggest Starfarer fanboy on the team apart from me, and I happen to be aware that you don’t own that particular comic.”

“I didn’t steal your comic, Lloyd.”

“Oh yeah? Then what happened to it?”

“Don’t ask me!” “You know that’s my favorite issue, Jay.”

“So? You think I’d take it just to spite you?”

“I think you’d-”

He cut off as Kai meandered into the kitchen, eating crackers and reading a comic.

Lloyd’s eyes widened. “Hey! That’s my missing comic!”

Kai glanced up at him. “You said I could borrow it.” “I did not! And give it to me, before you get cracker crumbs all over it!”

Kai rolled his eyes as Lloyd snatched it from him. “Alright, fine, take your dumb comic.”

Jay crossed his arms. “I think you owe me an apology, Lloyd.”

Lloyd stuck his tongue out at him, and Jay returned the gesture.

“Hey!” They turned to see Nya strolling into the room behind Kai, elbowing her brother sharply. “You said I could have that comic once you finished it.”

“Seriously, Kai? You can’t go around giving my comic to people without asking.”

“I wasn’t going to give it to her! She’s lying!” “Excuse me? You literally just said that like ten minutes ago-”

Zane and Cole joined them not long after, glancing around. “Guys! What’s with all the racket?”

“Kai promised me his Starfarer comic after he was done-”

“It’s not Kai’s, it’s mine! And he took it from me without asking and just auctioned it off to Nya!” “I didn’t auction off anything, it’s not like she paid me for it. Although, that's honestly not a bad idea…”

“What is this, a monopoly?” Jay asked. “We’re not paying for comics we already own, that’s dumb.”

“Yeah,” Lloyd agreed, “especially when they were mine in the first place.”

“Liar! Most of them were mine!” Jay insisted. “I should get dominion over my own comics!”

“Just because you own the most doesn’t mean you own all of them,” Lloyd countered. “You may have more comics by sheer number, but I have more rare comics than you and, overall, my comics have a higher value.”

“I’m sick of you two always deciding everything about Starfarer,” Cole said. “Why can’t one of us regulate the comics?”

“Whoever gets control over the comics is just going to have bias and distribute them to their advantage.”

“I think I would be the most responsible man for the job-”

“Stop lying to yourself, dirtclod, I’d obviously be better-”

“Better than Kai, yeah, if you’re trying to set the bar low.”

“Excuse me?”

“Guys,” Lloyd interrupted, slamming his fists down on the table. “There’s only one solution to settle this. We have a competition. Winner gets control over the Starfarer comics for… let’s say, the next six months.”

Kai cracked his knuckles, grinning. “You had me at competition.”

---

“When you said, ‘competition,’ somehow I was expecting something a little more grandiose than this.”

The ninja had gathered around the kitchen table, glancing down at the box Lloyd had dropped there. Starfarer: Galaxy Wars, it read.

“Yeah, Lloyd,” Cole agreed. “A board game? Seriously?”

“Not just any board game. The most popular, most difficult, most fun game out there. It is truly for the Starfarer master. Part roleplay, part strategy, part trivia- it puts your Starfarer knowledge to the test. That way, we know whoever wins this didn’t just get the win out of chance, but actually deserves it.”

Nya raised an eyebrow. “I mean, I guess. But you better not be an expert at this game.”

Lloyd shook his head. “I’ve only played it a few times, I promise.”

“Okay then,” Kai said. “May the best ninja win.”

As usual, that lasted about five minutes until they were all yelling at each other.

“Oh, come on!” Cole threw down his card. “I got stuck in the Imperial Sludge Swamp again?”

“Ha!” Jay leaned forward, moving his piece across the board, jumping over Cole’s pawn. “Next time you know to pick a character with better environmental perks.”

“Cole’s character is more well-rounded, though,” Zane pointed out. “If you are unable to gather enough energy before the end, it is likely the aliens will take you out.”

“Quit your yapping and let me take my turn.” Kai snatched the dice from Jay’s hand and tossed them- landing a perfect 12.

“You’re cheating!” Nya snapped. “That’s the third turn in a row you’ve rolled higher than a ten. Are you using weighted dice or something?”

“He’s using the exact same dice I just used, Nya.”

“It’s called skill,” Kai scoffed. “Maybe someday, you can be as good as me.”

“Rolling dice is completely based on chance! If the best skill you can boast is being able to roll high numbers, I think I’m doing pretty well.”

“Yeah, well, we’ll see how useless it is once I win this thing and get total control over all the Starfarer comics.”

“Fat chance,” Nya huffed as Kai moved his piece.

“Oh, look at that, I found a pile of scrap metal! I get to roll again!”

“Are. You. Kidding me!”

“Wait,” Zane put a hand on Nya’s shoulder. “He’s right by the alien spaceship. If he gets an 11 or less, he’ll be on their turf and they’ll shoot him down, kidnap him, or confront him, depending on his stats. The only way he could possibly get through this without negative consequences is by rolling a 12.”

“There’s no way he’ll do it again,” Cole agreed. “Nya, this is your chance to overtake him.”

“Let’s see.” Kai grabbed the two dice and shook up his hands. He shook and shook, stopped to blow on the dice, then shook some more-

“Just roll the stupid dice,” Cole snapped.

Kai dropped the dice, and time seemed to move in slow motion. Lloyd held his breath, leaning forward-

And watched as the dice rolled one six, then another.

A perfect roll.

“Cheating!” Nya cried. “Cheating, I tell you! There’s no way this is possible.”

“We can’t let him win,” Jay groaned. “He won’t share any comics with us.” “Not true! I’ll let Lloyd have one.”

“Only one?” “That’s better than none at all,” Jay snapped. “At least he’s giving you something.”

“He’s not going to be giving me anything, because he’s not going to win.”

Kai grinned, gesturing at the dice. “Sure, be my guest. See if you can beat me.”

Lloyd rolled, earning a seven.

Jay hissed between his teeth. “Tough luck, green bean- you get injured and robbed by aliens.”

“Actually,” Lloyd said, slipping a card from his pile and slamming it down on the middle of the table. “I don’t, because I play this special ability card, allowing me to pick the number of spaces I travel. I choose 10, landing myself on the abandoned spacecraft. Then I use my character’s high level mechanics skills and use this card-” he slammed down another card that showed scrap metal reserves- “to instantly fix the ship. Then I spend my energy points to get another turn, use the gas from my generator to fuel the ship, and then am able to fly the ship back to the base and restore the artifacts. According to the manual, it would take three days from my location, and Kai, the closest, would take five days in his slower spacecraft, meaning it is impossible for anyone to beat me back, and I win the game.”

For a moment, they were silent, gaping at him.

“How?” Cole murmured. “Dude, how did you do that?”

“He just crossed half the board in one turn,” Kai spluttered. “And I was about to win! That shouldn’t even be possible!”

“How many moves were you planning ahead?” Zane shook his head. “Your strategy appears to be far more complex than any of us were anticipating for this kind of game.”

“I knew something was up when he kept stashing his ability cards,” Jay groaned. “We were all using ours, but he hardly used any- he was saving them up to use them all in a big power move and catch us off guard, the little rascal!”

“You liar,” Nya hissed. “You said you only played this game a few times! This was way too complicated of a plan for a novice player.”

“Technically, that’s true,” Lloyd grinned. “I have only played a few times. But I never said how long I played for each time.”

“You conniving little gremlin.”

“Now, Nya,” Lloyd scolded in a sagely voice, barely able to suppress his laughter, “I’d be careful how you speak to me from now on. If you’re rude, I may not give you any Starfarer.”

“Yeah, this is going to get old, very quickly.”

“I can’t believe it,” Jay sighed. “You never share comics with us.”

Lloyd gawked at him. “Are you kidding? It’s because of my sharing that you guys are even into Starfarer in the first place! Jay was the only one who knew about it before I came, but even he didn’t tell anyone else he was a fanboy and kept stuff hidden in boxes. When I showed interest, do you remember how excited you got? You took everything out, just for me.”

Zane shook his head, smiling. “I still can’t believe you got me to binge the entire series.”

“Or how I spent hours investing in that game and tracking down all that information in the comics just to beat Jay’s high score? Which I crushed, by the way.”

Jay scowled. “For the last time, you beat me by five points! You didn’t crush anyone.”

Cole scoffed. “Someone’s just jealous. If it weren’t for Lloyd, I would’ve never beat you.”

“You showed us all something we love, huh, squirt?” Kai ruffled his hair, and Lloyd pulled away, like usual, but grinned at him, bumping his shoulder gently.

“Remember when you used to get all upset at me for slacking off and reading Starfarer comics during training?”

Kai reddened. “That was different! We were preparing you for the Final Battle, there was a lot to be done.”

“Hypocrites,” Lloyd whispered, giggling as he ducked a swing from Kai.

“Well, what are you going to do now, ‘master of the comics?’” Jay asked. “Hoard all the books to yourself? Read in front of us to taunt us?” “Tempting,” Lloyd said, “but I think first, I want to play another round of the Starfarer board game.”

Cole blinked. “Lloyd, it’s seven pm. And this took us like five hours to get through the first time.”

The ninja blinked at each other.

“Oh, it’s on!”

#ninjago #ninbingo #my fic #rosie writes #lloyd garmadon #jay walker #ninjago kai #ninjago nya #ninjago cole #ninjago zane #ahhh this is my last bingo fic! #its been so fun thank you all! #I'm especially grateful for Fabro :) #without this event we might've never been anything more than just acquaintances :) #im so glad we're friends now #luv u bestie #thanks for being so supportive and for hosting this event! #thanks for reading! #reblogs and comments greatly appreciated!

[lloydskywalkers]

hey idk if you’re doing requests but if you are can you give us the fluffy kai and lloyd sibling content we deserve?? like ummm maybe kai helping lloyd to do homework or something even tho they don’t go to school lmao 😂 i just need something pure :)

i am so very behind on replies but!! in my defense, i started a response for this, got about 10K words in, then realized i needed to give it an actual structure. this is not the 10K words one, but it is, technically, fluffy Kai and Lloyd sibling content? i hope it’s something along the lines of what you wanted :’D

Lloyd decides he wants his ear pierced at three forty-five in the debatable hours of the morning, which isn’t the oddest thing Lloyd has ever decided he desires at that time. But it isn’t usual, either, so Kai decides he probably does, at least, need to ask what brought this on as he begins superheating the edge of the needle so neither of them end up with tetanus, or something.

He’s a responsible brother, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to tell Lloyd no. That would require Kai pretending his own piercing never existed, which is impossible, since Lloyd was the one to help him out back when it got infected and Kai almost lost his entire upper ear.

“It wasn’t that bad,” Lloyd rolls his eyes. “You were just being a baby about it.”

“Oh yeah?” Kai shoots back. “Look who’s talking. I haven’t even touched your ear yet and you’re already wincing.”

“You’re taking forever,” Lloyd says testily. “Why can’t you just pierce it already?”

“Excuse me for trying to make it look good,” Kai says. “But if you really want an off-center piercing, be my guest.”

“No, no, make it look good,” Lloyd protests, straightening where he’s sitting across the bedroom floor from Kai.

Fortunately, they’re in the monastery tonight, otherwise they’d be crammed into the bathroom, or wherever else in the Bounty they wouldn’t wake everyone up. They’ve stashed away in Lloyd’s room, since he’s the furthest from Zane and therefore the least likely to be caught, if something goes wrong. Not that anything’s going to go wrong, of course, but you can never be sure, with them.

“Where’d you want it, again?” Kai asks, as he squints at the tiny earring stud they scavenged from Nya’s bag. He figures she’d support this as a worthy cause enough not to mind. Hopefully.

“On the right side?” Lloyd drums his fingers on the edge of his knee, a bit anxiously. “I sleep on my left more often, so yeah, the right. Just — just the normal ear piercing, for now.”

“For now, huh,” Kai mutters, carefully measuring out rubbing alcohol over the earring, before deciding to drown it in the bottle, for good measure.

“Well, I might decide I want another,” Lloyd crosses his arms. He winces. “Unless Sensei or the others kill me for this, first.”

“Lloyd, if piercing your ear is the worst thing you ever do as a teen, I’ll give you all the piercings you want myself,” Kai says. “And if anybody gives you trouble about it, just make some snarky comment, like, ah—”

“An earring is better to be stabbed with than a knife?”

“…FSM’s sake,” Kai sighs, staring at the bottle of rubbing alcohol and briefly entertaining how it’d taste. “Sure. Why not.”

Lloyd doesn’t look entirely reassured, even with his fun little jokes. “It is better than being stabbed with a knife, right?” he asks. “Like, I can do knife-stab pain, but I was kinda hoping it wouldn’t hurt that bad, you know…?”

Kai rolls his eyes. “It’ll hardly hurt at all,” he assures him, as he reaches for the little cotton balls and soaking one in alcohol. “I promise. You’re a ninja. With the pain tolerance you have, you’re probably not even gonna feel it.”

“Uh-huh, if you say — hey!” Lloyd flinches back from his hand, eyes wide in betrayal.

“Would you relax, it’s just the alcohol,” Kai frowns, going for his ear with the cotton ball again.

Lloyd makes a face, but lets him dab the alcohol on this time. “It’s cold,” he complains.

“Keep whining about it and we’re going back to the clip-on earring plan.”

“No, no, I want them pierced,” Lloyd says quickly. Kai smothers a laugh at how he attempts to appear relaxed, swiping the cotton ball over his earlobe once more for good measure. Satisfied that Lloyd, at least, won’t suffer any immediate crippling infections, Kai grabs for the needle they’re using, soaking the tip in alcohol.

“You…you know what you’re doing, right?” Lloyd asks, suddenly apprehensive now that the needle’s come into play.

“Of course I do, who do you think I am?” Kai says. “I pierced Nya’s ears when she was younger. I would’ve pierced Jay’s the first week we met, but he chickened out last minute.”

Lloyd presses his lips together, hiding a laugh. “If you’d come up to me with a needle the first week we met, I probably would’ve booked it, too.”

“I wasn’t bad,” Kai huffs, kneeing him in the side.

Lloyd runs a hand through his hair, spiking the edges up as he scowls, pitching his voice deeper. “I’m gonna be the green ninja, and none of you losers better get in the way—”

“I never said that!” Kai exclaims, swatting Lloyd across the head as he cackles. “You watch it, or I might slip up with the needle.”

“Sounds like something a green gi-stealer would say.”

“You’re such a brat,” Kai grumbles, hiding the heat rising in his cheeks by busying himself with the earring packaging. “I never sounded like that. And you’re one to talk, with that squeaky little evil laugh you used to do.”

“Alright, I’m dropping it, I’m dropping it,” Lloyd says hastily, his teasing faltering at the threat of turning the tables.

Kai smirks, shaking his head. “Alright,” he says, flexing his wrist once. “I’m gonna ice your ear so it’s numb, then do the actual piercing. You want a count down?”

“Surprise me,” Lloyd says, his hands fisting anxiously in the edges of his sweatshirt.

“Sure thing,” Kai nods absently. “So,” he starts conversationally, as he presses the ice to the back of Lloyd’s ear. “What did bring this on? And don’t give me the teen rebellion thing — seriously, this time.”

Lloyd hesitates, then sighs. He bites his lip, his eyes staring somewhere beyond the ceiling. “I dunno,” he mutters. “I just remembered, the other day, that I’d thought they were super cool as a kid.”

Kai stifles the urge to remind him that he’s still a kid, and continues to listen instead, nodding at him to go on.

Lloyd makes a face. “I don’t know. The mission today was — it was dumb, and I didn’t like how I felt afterwards, so I guess I wanted to do something stupid.”

“Ah,” Kai exhales quietly. He’d had a feeling it was about the mission, but he couldn’t be sure. It hadn’t even been that bad, on the whole, but the sound of Cole’s head cracking against the floor was enough to escalate it right into terrible territory.

Kai’s still thanking his stars that Cole’s got such a thick head. Concussions aren’t fun, even when they do have the chance to treat them immediately.

“I just…I thought maybe it’d be nice to mess up on purpose, for once,” Lloyd continues, his voice quiet. “When I wasn’t trying not to.”

Kai’s frown deepens at that one, his hand hovering where he’s caught the edge of Lloyd’s ear, his thumb pressed against the end of the needle. His sudden concerns over Lloyd’s potentially earring-destroying, Oni/dragon blood are swept away by the plaintively depressing tone Lloyd’s using. He opens his mouth, then shuts it, hesitating.  

He understands the sentiment, of course — probably too well to really put into words. Kai’s not exactly a stranger to messing up. He’s definitely not a stranger to beating yourself up after you mess up, either. He also understands, too well, how it can all build up sometimes — the constant fear of failure, the pressure not to mess up.

Sometimes you’re just struck with the irrational desire to mess up on purpose out of pure spite. Kai gets that. And Lloyd’s at least rational enough to pick something that won’t hurt anyone, and is more likely to get a laugh out of them all, if anything. Kai tries not to roll his eyes fondly.

Plus, Kai would be lying if he said it doesn’t warm his heart that Lloyd’s come to him for it. Which he should, of course, Kai’d better have first dibs on Lloyd’s first piercing, but still. The sentiment, and all.

“Well,” Kai finally says, realizing he’s left Lloyd hanging. “I don’t know about messing up, because this looks pretty rad. But it was definitely your call, so remember to tell Sensei that when he sees it.”

“Yeah, sure.” Lloyd takes a breath, squeezing his eyes shut. “Okay, I’m ready. Stab my ear, Kai.”

“I already did, moron. Did you miss what I just said?”

Lloyd’s eyes pop open, and he blinks. “Huh? For real?”

“Told you,” Kai snorts. “Ninja pain tolerance. Ear piercing’s got nothing on Cole when he scores a hit on you in practice.”

Lloyd’s frozen for a moment, then he scurries over to the mirror, brushing his lengthening hair away so he can get a proper look at it. Kai hovers behind him, suddenly slightly anxious.

“Do you, um, do you like it? You can always take it out, if you don’t. It’ll close over on its own, and you can like, get an actual professional to do it—”

“Shut up, Kai, I love it,” Lloyd beams, tracing his finger over the little silver stud. “I look cool.”

Kai lets out a tiny breath of relief, smirking in satisfaction instead. “As close to cool as you can get, beansprout.”

“Whatever,” Lloyd rolls his eyes, before returning to admiring himself in the mirror. “You’re just jealous I have a super cool piercing, and you don’t.”

“Hey, I gave you that piercing,” Kai scowls. “Just wait until my ear finally heals, I’ll show you cool.”

“Gee, yeah, I can’t wait to see what cheap skull earring you infect yourself with this time.”

“Alright buddy, you’re toeing it dangerously close to the line,” Kai grabs Lloyd in a headlock, digging his knuckles into Lloyd’s thick hair as he yelps, struggling to pull himself free.

“Ow, hey, Kai, watch my ear—”

“Little jerk,” Kai finally releases him with a huff.

“Too bad you’re stuck with me forever,” Lloyd replies, making a face as he brushes his hair back into place.

“Plenty of time to watch you make more mistakes, then,” Kai replies, easily.

Lloyd briefly tenses up, his expression working. Kai slings an arm around his shoulder, briefly squeezing.

“It wasn’t your fault, Lloyd,” he says, gently. “Cole’s gonna tell you the same thing, ten times over.”

“Y-yeah, okay,” Lloyd murmurs, staring at the rug. “I got it.”

Kai eyes him for a brief moment, then shakes his head, carefully flicking the edge of his ear. “This, however? Is definitely your fault. So don’t go selling me out when Sensei bites your head off for it.”

“I’m not a sellout,” Lloyd huffs. “This’ll be nothing. Wait ’til you see what he says about my tattoo, that’ll be the real meltdown.”

Kai barks a laugh out at that, sweeping the cotton balls back into the bag. He then pauses, Lloyd’s word choice hitting him.

“Hey, what do you mean, your tattoo.”

“Oh, would you look at the time—”

“Lloyd, I swear to FSM, if you went and got a tattoo without me—”

#answered #ninjago #lloyd garmadon #kai smith #tumblr pleASE format this right for once #my fic #bees-go-buzz

[williamismyhomeboy]

Interview from www.popmusicfan.com 2005

If you only choose one new band to listen to this year, don't let it be anyone other than The Academy Is. With a brand new debut CD out on Fueled by Ramen records and a tour with labelmates Fall Out Boy and Gym Class Heroes, this band is ready to show everyone that they take their music seriously -- but still have fun while doing it. We hung out with lead singer William Beckett on the April 14th stop of their tour and somehow braved the freezing Florida weather.

How's the tour going so far? William: Well, the tour has been pretty spectacular so far. This is our first tour having had the record out and it's been really overwhelming, the response from people and from the other bands as well. We're good friends with all the bands on tour, we didn't know Silverstein until like two days ago, but they're really cool guys. But yeah, it's been great, I miss Midtown... but there's always next time. If you had to choose three bands for the ultimate tour, either to go see or to play with, who would you choose and why? William: Fleetwood Mac because I love Fleetwood Mac, they're one of the great rock bands that did it in a pop way, in a really classy way, too. Led Zepplin.. to go see or to go play with? Jennifer: Either one. William: Oh, yeah, it'd be the same anyway. Pink Floyd, I wouldn't want Pink Floyd because it'd be bad to play with them, they're just too conceptionally profound. Their show is far too extravagant, we'd look like amateurs. Jennifer: Well, if you were just going to see them... William: Oh, yeah, so Pink Floyd. What are your pet peeves about the other guys in the band? William: I've never been asked this before, this is interesting. Yeah, there's a lot. It's a cool thing about being in the band, you never spend that much time with anyone ever. Even married couples don't spend that much time together and that's not even just one on one, that's seven or eight dudes sleeping on a bus. So yeah, we have our differences, just being different people, having different personalities. One day we'll be in a bad mood, one day we'll be in a good mood, one day someone will smell bad and we won't, you know... But for the most part, it's a really brotherly love/hate relationship like most brothers and sisters. For us, we're like a family, the way that we sort of stick it through, for the most part. If you found out you were adopted and you had two celebrities as your birth parents, who would you want them to be and why? William: Wow, I haven't been asked these questions before, this is really cool. If I found out I was adopted... do they have to be like during the same time? Jennifer: Nope, whoever. William: For a mom, I'd probably go with Audrey Hepburn and I'd probably go with... this is tough. I should pick someone like Abe Lincoln or someone crazy. Yeah, I'm gonna pick George Bush. Jennifer: Which one? William: GW, I'm gonna pick GW. Jennifer: Do you like Bush? William: I don't want to talk about it. But his kids seem to have a good time. [everyone laughs] Jennifer: True! William: Right? So there we are.

What's the most embarrassing CD you have in your collection? William: Well, I have a lot of guilty pleasures, stuff most people would think is like, 'What?' Like Rod Stewart and Prince, a lot of stuff that you guys probably don't like or listen to. But my first hip hop CD that I ever bought was Ginuwine so bad. Jennifer: That's not that bad, it could be worse! William: No way, that's so bad, that's so terribly bad. Jennifer: What about Sisqo or something? William: Well, that's... wait, is that you? Jennifer: No! [everyone laughs] Well, I do have his CD, but it's from like seventh grade! William: Yeah, Ginuwine... well, Sisqo's probably worse. But at any rate, I'm a big opera fan, too. That's not really an embarrassing thing, but yeah. Jennifer: Have you seen Phantom of the Opera? William: Yeah! Jennifer: Was it good? William: Uh, no. I've seen the actual opera before... Jennifer: I did, too! On Broadway? William: Yeah! And it's amazing, I was raised on the Andrew Lloyd Webber performance disc and then I saw the movie and it was cool, but they changed some lines and it was just really Hollywood. The singing wasn't great, all the actors actually sang so it was cool but they just didn't do it very well, I don't think. Who's the most famous person that you have in your cell phone? William: Probably, like... I don't like name dropping. Jennifer: You can do it, we'll forgive you. William: [laughs] I should make a joke... Pete Wentz, and that's a joke, but Pete's getting pretty famous. That I actually talk to? Jennifer: Um... yeah. Or do you have any random people in there that you just got from a friend or anything? William: Yeah, I have Jakob Dylan's number but I never use it. I have, I don't know, I don't really look for famous peoples' numbers but the most famous person I have is probably Lyor Cohen, you probably don't know who he is. He owns Warner Brothers and Electra and Atlantic. He's like a multi-billionaire and he's one of the coolest guys in the world. I've met a lot of label people before but yeah, he's probably the most admirable one. If you had to describe yourself in five words, which ones would you choose? William: Myself? I'm really bad with self description, I'm really good with self reflection and creation and song writing and things like that, but actually flat out 'this is who I am?' Honest, passionate, polite, moderately-conservative... hyphenated! And, uh, sexual. Jennifer: Oh, that's a good one! Just kidding. William: I'm actually kidding, that wouldn't be my top five. Jennifer: None of them? William: No! None of them wouldn't except for sexual. Kidding once again, there we are! There we are, just joking. So there's my four. What's the biggest purchase that you've made since getting signed and everything? William: Other than my laptop... uh, yeah, it's my new Mac G4, I don't know I feel like a nerd talking about it. But yeah, my new laptop, probably. I try to conserve, to save my money, I don't really like to spend it on a lot of things. What are one of your favorite lyrics from one of your songs? William: It's really hard because... I think you'd have to take each song for it's whole, the song in it's whole is the work, you know what I mean? But I guess in the bridge of "Down and Out," I don't know if you know which song that is, but that song is the closest to me personally. The bridge is really cool and really close to me and all of our friends, just because we name dropped all of our good friends who really helped us and who we wouldn't be here without, and a bunch of records that we were influenced by during the writing process. Like, uh, Johnny and Tony, if you know the lyrics, they started a small record label called LLR and we had our EP on there. I had a solo project in high school.. Jennifer: Wasn't that Remember Maine? William: Yeah! Wow! You did your homework. So that was sort of like the moment in my life where I was making the decision to do music versus going to school, and no one believed in me really except for me and Johnny and Tony. It was a little bit later on that Tony came into the picture but Johnny was and is my best friend and the reason why I'm here, so he helped us get our foot into the door and we've sort of had this success since then which surpassed what they did for us. But we kind of took them with us, like now Johnny is head of retail at Fueled by Ramen. We were like, 'Hey, Fueled by Ramen, this dude is awesome, pick him up!' And Tony is our tour manager, on tour with us, so it's great, it's awesome. That's pretty much the bridge. Jennifer: We were kind of talking about that last night, about how random all the names are and stuff? We were wondering about that. William: Well the song sort of starts with this story about domestic abuse and escaping and getting away from something that you're afraid of or harmed by, it's sort of really dark. But the whole essence of the song, we didn't want to just focus on that, we wanted to focus on the ups and downs of life and growing up. The second verse says a lot about that growth process and friends and coming to that realization that most of your friends in high school, you're going to have to say goodbye to relatively soon and that's something that's hard for everybody I think, to say goodbye to anyone, be it death or be it whatever someone chooses or ends up having have happen to them. But for us it's not about like finding a dark corner and hiding and blaming other people and getting angry and aggressive, it's about accepting darker times and sort of welcoming those things when they happen, you know, to better understand and appreciate the great things in your life and the people that love you. Are you okay? Jolene: Uh huh! William: You're just cold, aren't you? Do you want my jacket? Jolene: No, it's okay. William: Are you sure? Jolene: Yeah, I'm fine! William: So yeah, for us it was really fitting to make the song about more than just that instance, you know, to make it a little more well-rounded so that was just, yeah.

What's something that people would be surprised to learn about the band? William: Probably our seriousness and what we're trying to accomplish. We have a lot of fun, we do, we indulge but our main scope isn't to be a big band and get famous and get chicks, or to get drunk and do drugs and be like this icon. Like, no one will tell you that unless they're just straight up rockstars, but for us, we really want to help people and change the world in the smallest way or globally and that's really what our end of the road goal is. To transcend age, to transcend sex, to transcend race, to transcend languages. Bands like U2, bands like Pink Floyd and bands that I was talking about earlier, bands that shaped generations and shaped people. It's like, 'You're playing these indie tours, you're playing to these young kids, how are you supposed to change the world?' But for me, I see that as an opportunity also. I also want to appeal to older crowds, I want to appeal to people our age, or maybe people that are a little bit older, like twenty-six, twenty-seven years-old and I think that our record does and will once they hear it. But for the future, as we expand and grow and as our minds grow and as our musicianship and our scope and those things grow, we want to be one of those bands that can make a difference and can help people. We want to be that band that you saw when you were fourteen, like our parents loved the Beatles or whoever when they were fourteen years old and they still love them today, and they're like fifty or sixty years-old. That's the band that we're going to be, because we're going to be the band or the songwriters that stick with the generations. I think the way you do that is being fucking straight up honest and genuine and unselfish. If you write about things that are self-loathing and very trendy and very high school angst, those are the people you're going to appeal to and that's it. You know, your mom's not going to listen to a band that sings about slitting their own throat or hanging themselves or crappy metaphors that are in like, Goosebumps books, you know? I think being genuine and honest and smart and unselfish and really looking at the world in a different light... if you have a minute, I try to do this exercise every morning. I think about people's minds, in this example let's think about the musician or whoever that's on a label that's writing these lyrics, okay? I sort of think of their creative mind as a room and let's take one of these singers that sings about one of these things like self-loathing or slitting wrists or something. So they're in this room and it's totally dark, and they have this candle in front of them and it's creating this light that they can only see like three inches in front of their face. They can only relate to those three inches in front of them which is their own little isolation bubble where they can't relate to anything beyond that because they don't know it exists. So they're so wrapped in themselves, writing about how much life sucks and how much it's unfair and about how much they've been mistreated. Or also things that are very self-righteous, like, 'I'm the best, this is how you do it,' things like that. There are those people everywhere, they're in high schools, they're parenting children, they're on their death beds... they're everywhere, you know? These people, I think, especially these artists are too wrapped up in themselves to realize that there might be a wall behind them with a light switch and if you flip that switch there's this whole room around you that illuminates. And for me, that's the world around me, that's everything. That's this tree, that's you guys, that's my family back home, that's this show, these people that are here, the people that are staying at this hotel. It's how it's cold and you're cold and I'm sorry that you're cold, you know? It's the world around you. Every morning I try to wake up and turn on the light, I try to turn on my creative room light to make sure that I'm always viewing the world in the way. I think if more people did that, a lot of things could change for people in their own lives and in other people's lives. That's one of the main things that I'm trying to convey, especially in our newest stuff that we're writing for the next record, so yeah, that's sort of something that people probably don't know about me or us. Jennifer: You're awesome, I decided that. Just now. What's the strangest voicemail or answering message that you've ever received? William: Received? I've given a lot of crazy ones. Probably the strangest one I've ever received... man, it's on the spot, you got me again. I'm tongue tied. Ohhh yeah, this is awesome! [everyone laughs] There was a point when I got a lot of prank calls when people hated me and stuff, it was that stupid, like... Jennifer: Jealousy? William: Kind of, but it was before I had really any success, it was just myself going for what I believed in. Since I was doing something different and not going for a screamo band or something, so it was a big deal when I was playing an acoustic guitar and singing melodies, so it was like 'What the hell?' It was a big uproar. So I got like crazy ones like, 'You're a faggot, you should kill yourself,' stuff like that. Jennifer: That's so mean! Jolene: That's terrible! William: Yeah, but it's awesome, though. No, for real! It's so funny, I know for a fact that that person has grown up and has seen me live by example and that I went for my dream and it's totally paid off, and it's going to pay off in the future more fruitfully than ever. Instead of me feeling anger and being like, 'Fuck that guy, I hope he's burning in Hell' or whatever, I hope that he realized that the way that he was living and the fear that he had about being his own person, I hope that he turned that around, so yeah, it's kind of funny. Jennifer: What about one of the funny ones that you've left people? William: Oh, man, there were some nights that I just called people singing crazy songs that I totally made up at four in the morning, I don't even know, man. I can't really get into too much detail, there were some wild ones. I do voices, I'll be like, 'Hey, yo-a, it's Johnny from over at Auto Repairing, I got your car and it's looking sweet.' [everyone laughs] I have this British voice and this gay voice and some other shit and it's hilarious, I would leave people messages like that and not tell them who I am. What's the last movie that you saw? William: Last movie? Oh, man, that's bad, that's terrible. I had a journal that I write on the website and I actually just talked about this. I'm on this weird horror movie kick right now, and I'm into crappy old horror movies right now. Not even old, like eighties or nineties. I don't recommend them to anyone, it's like Pet Sematary and From Dusk Til Dawn. Well that's like a Quentin Tarantino movie so that's actually a good movie, but the last movie I actually watched was House of 1000 Corpses. [everyone laughs] Jennifer: Oh, God. Jolene: Did you like that? William: I think it's great! For two reasons, alright. One, it's not original by any stretch of the imagination as far as a horror film, it's like Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets something vile, you know. It's basically like Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets a strip club, that's what that movie is. But, BUT-- Jennifer: Oh, I want to hear the but, because I don't think there's any defending this movie. [everyone laughs] William: The way that the movie is edited and the way that the movie is shot, with the color contrast and the way that it looks is just fucking phenomenal. I think the movie is so cool purely because of the way that it looks and because of the cinematography of it, but I'm just a geek like that, those are the kinds of things I look for. But if we're talking about movies that are actually good, go buy Big Fish, it's a great movie. Jennifer: Is it good? I heard that it's really depressing. William: Did you? No way. Jennifer: I work at a video store and that's what everyone's told me, I haven't watched it. William: But those people that told you that mind be those people-- Jennifer: Oh, the close minded ones, yeah. William: The people with the light off! If you watch that movie it's so cool because it seriously confronts some issues like death and memories and relationships being parents and fathers and mothers and their children. I thought it was a really heartwarming movie, especially at the end. It's not this cheese fucking Hollywood ending that everyone wishes would happen but doesn't, you know, but yeah I think it's a great movie. Jennifer: Have you seen I Heart Huckabees? William: I have not, yet. Jennifer: It seems like a movie you'd like. William: I'm sure I would like it. Jennifer: It's kinda like, off the wall, it seems like one you'd like. William: My girlfriend got it and said that it was pretty cool and I'd probably like it. Yeah, I should probably get it. Jennifer: Yeah, I didn't like it that much. William: You didn't? Jennifer: I like my stupid girly movies. William: Like what? Like what? Jennifer:: Like, have you seen the Notebook? William:: I haven't seen that one yet! Jennifer: What?! It's so good. You will cry, I bet. William: I'm one of those dudes that cries in movies, like seriously. Jennifer: Everyone cries in that movie! William: Dude, I even cried in, this is so embarrassing, I even cried in A Walk to Remember. Jolene: Oh, I cried in that one. Jennifer: That movie is so sad! William: I cried like seven times in that movie ALONE, I was alone! I have a huge crush on Mandy Moore, too, like a Hollywood Crush. Jennifer: That one was really sad. William: But at the same time, you know, it's also very... Jennifer: No. William: You don't think so? Jennifer: No! She should've lived. William: But she did through him! She changed. Jennifer: I know, I know! But wouldn't it have been better if she just lived forever? William: Well, it's not Hollywood. Jennifer: I know! What's in your pocket right now? William: Like, seventeen cents in change and a guitar pic, and that's it. Oh, and my cell phone is in my jacket, if that counts. Jennifer: It counts! William: These are cool questions! Did you make them up, too? Jolene: No. [laughs] William: Maybe you should let her make some up next time! Jennifer: I tried! I was like, 'Jolene, help me think of some questions.' She said, 'We're going to do it on the way there.' Two and a half hours later, oh no, no questions. [everyone laughs]

What's in your CD player right now? William: I have an I-Pod. Jennifer: Well what's on your I-Pod that you're listening to a lot lately? William: I'm just going to be difficult. No, I have an I-Pod, sorry. [everyone laughs] I listen to tapes, I don't even have a CD player. No, uh, what am I like loving right now? I'm loving Ryan Adams right now. I'm loving Muse. Jennifer: Oh, they're so good! William: I was on this huge Muse thing and I totally forgot about it and didn't listen to it for forever. I listened to them again today and I was like, AH! I was like, [does Italian voice] yes, yes, yes, this is so good. [everyone laughs] I'm listening to a lot of Radiohead, I'm always listening to Simon and Garfunkel, I'm a huge Simon and Garfunkel fan. Prince, I'm listening to a lot of Prince, a bit of Bowie. It's sort of today's little shuffle encompassed, so that was that. What's the last concert you've went to, other than one that you've played at? William: Damn... I was at South by Southwest but I didn't see any bands, I was just wandering throughout the streets. Last time I was at a show, watching bands... oh, yeah! it was an acoustic show in Chicago, it was Bob Nanna from Hey Mercedes and Justin Pierre from Motion City Soundtrack. They just played acoustic, it was really cool. What are some questions that you hate hearing in interviews? I probably should've asked you this at the beginning so I wouldn't have asked you any of them. William: [laughs] Yeah, right! There really aren't any questions that I really hate, I encourage tough questions. I enjoy people asking tough questions. Hard hitting questions or ones that are condescending because it's their right as journalists to ask those questions. I wouldn't ask somebody, 'What songs do you hate? And I won't write those.' No, I wouldn't ask anyone that, I would just write what I love and write what I want. So yeah, that's my answer. What's a question that you've been wanting an interviewer to ask you but they haven't? William: I haven't thought of one because with every interview, with a few exceptions, I've been asked new questions that I haven't heard before, like today for instance. That's enough for me to keep interested.

#the academy is #william beckett #2005 #interview #text #early 2005 #no specific date #mine

[firefighterkingdom]

#13 Oklahoma Smoke Divers – Elite FireFighter Training & Why It Matters

Oklahoma Smoke Divers! These guys are not only bada**es but are helping to take firefighter training to the next level. Our guests are Chad Miller and Bryan Lloyd of the Oklahoma Smoke Diver Association. Both are District Chiefs for Tulsa Fire Department (TFD).

The organization conducts advanced firefighter training known as the Oklahoma Smoke Diver course. The association allows Smoke Diver instructors a philanthropic platform to improve the fire service.

Robert Sanchez: So what’s up? Hey, this is Robert Sanchez, host of FireFighter Kingdom. We’re back with my co-host Vince Trujillo and producer. Vince is the guy who makes everything look nice. You see all the graphics on our Facebook and our social media, and thanks to Vince Trujillo for all that. He always gets off on our community segment, starts talking. But we’re fortunate today to have two of Tulsa’s greatest, Bryan Lloyd and Chad Miller.

Chad Miller: That’s debatable.

Robert Sanchez: I’m actually extremely honored to have teached with Chad Miller in the PEP instructor program through the IAFF. Thanks Chad, you’re a great instructor I’ve taught with, and I won’t say that ever again so don’t tell the other PEP instructors, man. How are you doing, Chad?

Chad Miller: Good.

Robert Sanchez: How are you doing Mr. Lloyd?

Bryan Lloyd: Good. Great, man.

Robert Sanchez: Let’s get started here. I just wanted to talk. I was interested, I just started hearing about this smoke diver program. I’ve heard about it just across the country, there’s been teaching and just hearing about it more and more and I was interested and I said, “I’m going to give Chad a call,” and see if you guys would come on and talk about your program and so I’m glad to have you guys. We’re lucky. The FireFighter Kingdom is lucky to have you guys and the rest of the United States or the world, in some cases. We actually have people who download throughout the world and listen to this podcast, so we’re lucky for that.

So let’s just get started. So both of you gentlemen are District Chiefs there in Tulsa District… Correct me if I’m not saying the correct rank structure, but…

Chad Miller: That’s correct.

Robert Sanchez: Okay, so District Chiefs in Tulsa, Oklahoma. And you guys are also the top elders of the Oklahoma Smoke Divers Association, is that correct?

Bryan Lloyd: Yes sir.

Chad Miller: Yes.

Robert Sanchez: Nice. So, Chad, tell me a little bit about yourself, man, the fire career and how’d you get started in the smoke diver program and your career there in Tulsa?

Chad Miller: Man, I’m a third-generation firefighter. So I grew up as a little boy, watching my grandpa and my uncle in the fire service. My dad had a 20-year career as a volunteer in the town that we grew up in, so I got interested in it pretty quickly after school, started as a volunteer firefighter, moved to a paid department in a small town next door in a suburb community of Tulsa, and then Brian and I got hired in the same class, 20 years ago this past April. So we both came to Tulsa at the same time and have just progressed up the ranks.

Just I’m the newest promoted District Chief in our department, as of about a week ago, and, like you said, I’ve done some teaching. Teach with the International Association of Firefighters, I’ve done a little bit of union work for my local. And then teach a lot, also just around the state for various fire service organizations.

Robert Sanchez: Nice, congratulations on the promotion, brother.

Chad Miller: Thank you.

Bryan Lloyd: So, like Chad said, I came on in 2000, and we came on together. I was never around the fire service. I didn’t know any firefighters. How I got into it was, I grew up wanting to be in the military. I knew from age 10, I had the army stuff on my walls, and joined the military. I did six years active duty, I did one deployment, and then I was just at a slow time. There was nothing going on, and I was getting ready to do a third enlistment, and I thought, “Man, if I’m in this one more time I’m going to make this a career.”

Bryan Lloyd: And my uncle was actually a cop in Tulsa and he kept telling me, “Man, I wish I had been a firefighter.” And he’s like, “All these guys are always hanging out.” And anyway I was home on leave, and he’s like, “Man, you need to go check it out. Go talk to them, because you’d be perfect. You’re used to being in a group, being in the military.”

I went down and talked to some of the guys and I said, “You know what?” There was a test coming up, an entrance exam, and I just said, “If I do good on this entrance exam I’m going to get out and if I don’t I’m going to stay in the army.” I did good. They’re like, “Yeah man, you did great. We’ll probably see you in the next class.” So I get out of the army and then I didn’t get hired. So, welcome to the fire service.

But anyway, I just got some job, got hired my second time. And Chad and I had pretty similar careers. We both came out of the academy, we were both on the rescue team, the rescue taskforce. Both of us were different stations, but always liked the training. So our careers always gravitated by each other. The smoke diver thing, how it got going was, in 2003, I was working out at our headquarters gym, and a chief came in. And he goes, “Hey man, you want to go to the most challenging training that I’ve ever been to?”

And he’d just come back from Mississippi’s program. And I said, “Yeah.” I’m 27 at the time, I think I can do anything. I’m like, “Yeah, bring it man, let’s go.” So me and another dude went down there and I completed Mississippi’s program, and loved it. At the time there was three or four guys in Tulsa that had been through. I was still a firefighter in the back of the truck, and I was still learning the job. I just shelved it. Like, “Man, this training would be cool to deliver some day.”

And fast forward 20 years, fast forward about 17, 18 years, I was promoted to District Chief. And I thought I was going out to a district and they came to my station and said, “Hey, congrats, you’re promoted. As of today, you’re the new Training Chief.” So I got in there, started learning that job and I thought, “Man, I got the platform to get ahold of my old contacts and maybe we can bring this program to Tulsa.” A lot of guys were interested in it, and it just took off from there, man.

Robert Sanchez: Nice. So good thing you passed your firefighter test a second time or you’d be a cop, probably, because that’s what always happens.

Bryan Lloyd: Man, I don’t know. I joke around, I agree. I don’t know how old you are, man, you’re a lot younger than me, but I grew up watching Miami Vice. They had the fast cars and the boats and everything, and I thought that was being a cop. Once I realized that that’s not it at all, I’m like, “I’m out man, give me the firefighting gig.”

Robert Sanchez: Right, right. Yeah, that’s what I tell all the cops around here, man. There’s some friends of mine, I say, “You couldn’t pass the firefighter exam, so you’re cops now, so you’re stuck with it. Look at this dream now,” that’s what I tell them. No, they’re really good friends of mine.

So I’m sure everybody watches, or used to watch Live P.D., man. Tulsa, there’s some crazy things that happen down there. I didn’t realize that.

Bryan Lloyd: Yeah, man. We’re friends with a bunch of those cops, and yeah, it’s crazy. It’s not that big of a city, but for whatever reason a lot of crazy stuff happens here, so [crosstalk 00:06:54] …

Robert Sanchez: Well, it’s like Albuquerque. I’m sure you hear about them. Breaking Bad and everything else, but.

Bryan Lloyd: Oh yeah, I’m an addict.

Robert Sanchez: Yeah, so I mean, over here it’s crazy with this COVID thing. I mean, I don’t know, is it as crazy down there as it is over here? How is it in the fire station?

Bryan Lloyd: That’s what he’s doing right now is the COVID response and all that.

Chad Miller: We’re like everybody else, man. At one point in team, we had literally 15% of our field personnel off on quarantine at the beginning. And we’ve been monitoring that since the beginning. I had a unit up there that is… We track all of our people that are sick or in quarantine. And we’ve gotten a lot better. Over the last few months, we’ve made some changes to putting people off versus putting them on a monitored schedule, so they just watch their self for two weeks.

And it’s really helped our numbers a lot. But it’s crazy, man. We went from, “Hey, you can’t go anywhere,” to now you go into a restaurant, you got to have a mask on when you walk in, but as soon as you sit down, apparently, at the table, it’s good, you can take

Bryan Lloyd: You’re safe. You’re safe at the table.

Chad Miller: You’re safe.

Robert Sanchez: Right.

Chad Miller: So none of it makes sense. But we’re just getting by like everybody else.

Robert Sanchez: Right. Yeah, same here, man. It seems like most of the fire houses and fire stations across the United States are dealing with the same stuff. Like you said, at first, it was, “Everybody wear them,” constantly. And now it’s… I shouldn’t say “lax,” because it’s still a requirement here in New Mexico. I mean, you can’t go anywhere without wearing a mask. But like you said, in a restaurant, as soon as you sit down to eat, you don’t have COVID no more, I guess. Or there’s no chance of spreading it.

But anyways, yeah, I was just curious on that. So with the smoke diver program, so how many states… I just noticed there’s some in Georgia, correct? Did you say Minnesota, Oklahoma, how many states actually have a program?

Chad Miller: Like Brian said, Mississippi has a program that runs on its own. I believe Florida was actually the first smoke diver program in the country. Georgia, Indiana, and Oklahoma. All three of our programs are… Georgia was the first one. So back in the late ’70s, some Georgia guys went to the Florida program, and then came back and started the Georgia Smoke Diver’s program. And then off of that program, Indiana’s program and our program, we’re… I don’t know if subsidiaries is the right word, but those two states based their program off of the Georgie Smoke Diver model.

Bryan Lloyd: I think Alabama. There’s five or six states that have them. Florida, Indiana, Georgia and Oklahoma are all our six-day programs. Mississippi’s is five. I think it’s Alabama that has a four-day. So maybe six, seven states. But then there’s no copyright or trademark. So if you Google search it, you could pull up 30. Anyone could use the name, “Smoke Diver.” There might be a one-day smoke diver course in this state. But as far as week-long programs, there’s five to seven states that have a program.

Robert Sanchez: Okay. So the five states that have them here in the United States. Is the curriculum similar through all the states or does every state change it up a little bit, or is it different?

Bryan Lloyd: So, that’s a great question. And pretty much Georgia, Indiana and Oklahoma are all… Georgia, they started it. But they all joke, say, “Hey, we’re taking over the world.” And then we do the Doctor Evil laugh. But it’s pretty much, they have the outline. And then each state, Indiana and us, we follow their outline, but they also encourage us, if we want to change an evolution… Because the premise of the program, it’s taking line-of-duty deaths and then recreating those scenarios and putting firefighters in those scenarios and then showing them how to successfully mitigate the incident.

Bryan Lloyd: So when we were in Georgia last year, they just had a collapsed incident, where luckily the firefighter, they got him out just in time. But they were building a scenario for that. So Georgia and Indiana, we always talk back and forth. So hey, if you have something come up that happens in Tulsa, we have a core number of scenarios that we want to run every class. But maybe if something happens three months ago that we feel like we need to, It’s plug-and-play is what I’m saying. We have the same seven or eight we do every class, but if something happens and we want to change them, there’s no hard, fast rule that says you have to.

Mississippi’s I only know because I went through theirs years ago. It’s a little different. It’s run by the state fire school. And so they have dedicated instructors there that, these five guys are in smoke diver, these five guys are rescue, these five hazmat. So theirs is the same, it never changes. And it’s pretty similar. It’s pretty similar, same premise, taking bad scenarios and showing guys how to get out of them. Theirs is a little more stuff using ropes. You have to be able to tie a Swiss Seat.

So there’s some rappelling stuff. Nothing crazy like that rescue that FDNY did [crosstalk 00:12:35] …

Robert Sanchez: That was crazy, huh? That’s a true rescue right there [crosstalk 00:12:36].

Bryan Lloyd: Yeah, and those guys train all the time for that kind of stuff. But the different on Mississippi’s is, there’s a little more of that kind of stuff like rappelling down. So yeah, but they’re all pretty similar for the most part.

Robert Sanchez: Right. So tell me a little bit about the program. Because I mean, I’m amazed watching the videos and going through firefighter training, obviously, myself. And you know how hard it is and how tired you get. I mean, I don’t think the general public really knows, having the gear on. I mean, we’ve all been there, feeling the heat and all that stuff. And just watching some of the videos and talking to your chat a little bit, and just some other firefighters around the country that I’ve talked to that’ve been through the smoke diver programs. I mean, I wouldn’t argue that you guys are some of the elite, right? I mean, it’s a tough program to get through. And tell me a little bit [crosstalk 00:13:33] … I’m sorry, go ahead.

Chad Miller: Elite, I don’t know that I would put that word. I mean, at the end of the day, man, we’re like everybody else. It is, by far, probably, at least ours, the six-day structured programs, physically and mentally it’s going to be the hardest thing most of our people have ever done unless they’ve been in the military or some other type of service like that.

But our programs are built to Oklahoma, Georgia, Indiana. There’s a PT component built-in the front end of ours each day, and the PT’s not to get you physically fit. It’s not to punish you. It’s to make you tired, both mentally and physically. And then we teach the first half of our class or teaching day. So we teach you skills and then the last half of that class, we’re going to put you into scenarios and we’re going to test the skills that we taught you.

And like Brian said, the goal is to take line-of-duty deaths and give our firefighters the skills they need to be adaptable to get out of those situations. At the same time, you’re developing critical decision-making in as high-stress of an environment as you can get in a training scenario. All of our evolutions are 1403-compliant where we use the live fire and those types of things. So everything is still within the standard.

So we’re trying to make it as stressful as we can. And we’ll use the PT in the day. You do PT like that for six days straight. At the end of day six, you’re whooped. And so, lot of times, you know Robert, as well as we do in the fire service. Bad things don’t happen the minute you get off the truck. It’s after you’ve been there and you’ve worked through two bottles and you’re tired. That’s when the bad stuff happens, and so we have to train that way.

Robert Sanchez: Right. So what’s the main goal? So you go through your program, and not everybody makes it, and I could see why. What’s the main goal? When you have participants come out of your program, what do you want? What’s your goal? What do you want them to have? What tools or training do you want them to have when they get out of your program?

Bryan Lloyd: So that’s a great question. And backing up to the last one you asked is, we came in. Georgia’s program has been around, like Chad said, since the late ’70s and they spearheaded Florida and Georgia. They spearheaded this whole thing. And the motto on the logo, it’s, “The elite few, strong in mind and body.” And for me, it’s hard to wrap my head around that because I’m just some regular dude and I’m like any other firefighter. I don’t think I’m anything special. But I am proud of the accomplishment that I was able to make it through the program.

And if you ask 10 guys what they think it’s about, you’d probably get 10 different answers. But for me, there’s a couple things as the chief elder of the program that I want guys to take away from it, and girls. I went through… In Georgia, there’s a female. [Melissa Russell 00:16:54]. She was the first female that had come through in 30 years. And made it about halfway through the week and went out on a scenario. Well, she came back and made it through with Chad in his class.

So it’s male and female. But what I want guys to bring out of it is, like Chad said, unless you’ve been in the military or played sports at a high level, or done… I don’t know where else, but most guys don’t know what they’re capable of mentally. And the Navy SEALs re-popularized that 40% rule. The militaries use that. I heard it when I was in the military 20 years ago, 25 years ago. It is, when you think you’re done you’ve got so much more left in the tank. But most guys are not ever put in that position. They don’t ever get that kind of adversity. They don’t even know what they’re going to do when they get there.

And that’s what the program, to me, it’s, we want to train guys. It’s like Chad said earlier. Most stuff happens when you breathe down that second air bottle and you’re so tired, you just want to lay down. We get firefighters, we train them to that point and then we put them in these intense scenarios on the fire ground, and we’re just showing them that. We’re teaching them that, to dig down and persevere. The program to me, 50% of it’s teaching men and women mental toughness.

And we always joke. We were teaching class the other day, some subfloor rescue, and we said, “Well, what would you do here?” Like, “I don’t know.” Well, there’s no one else coming. When you call 911 it’s us, man, and you know that, Robert. And we’re trying to teach them. We’re trying to train people to just be able to unlock the potential they have inside of them, okay? And to teach them that when something bad goes wrong, I can stay calm.

And it’s like the military. I was in six years in active duty. And they would put us in this really intense training to show you that, when you’re here in real life, you can reach back in there and say, “Hey, I’ve been here before. I know what to do here.” That’s the smoke diver program broke down to the bare essences. We’re going to take men and women, put them through these horrible scenarios. The first three days, we’re going to give them the tools to be successful, and then we’re going to put them back there. High heat, zero visibility. And we’re going to show them that by relying on your training, by staying calm, you’re going to be able to successfully mitigate this scenario.

But then from there, once they successfully pass that class, we want them to go back. The military calls it a force multiplier. And what that means, they call the special operations, force multipliers. So they will drop a special forces team of 12 men in and then those 12 men will train hundreds. And the reality is, not everyone that comes through the training is going to make it. But myself, Chad, seven or eight other guys from Tulsa made it, and then we were able to come back and take that training, whether everybody can make it through or even wants to make it through, we can still take that training back to our departments and deliver it to the men and women.

And we’ve been teaching classes for a couple years now, from what we learned that one week. So I could go on all day, but in a nutshell, it’s mental toughness and then it’s teaching servant leadership. That’s the two things you hear all week, is that you are nothing special because you had this training, that your goal, your expectation, is to take this training back to your department, back to your community, be a humble public servant. And then give it to the men and women in your community and help them be successful.

It’s not about, “Hey, I’m some bad*** because I’ve been through this program.” Because just like when we referenced that rescue in New York the other day. Those guys have probably forgotten more than we’ve ever learned. All we are is a couple dudes in Oklahoma that are trying to… That saying in the fire service. “We’re trying to leave it better than we found it. We are not the experts but we’re trying to make a difference.” And that’s it, man.

Robert Sanchez: Right. And it hits hard there at home, and I’ve actually had the honor of teaching our fire academy for a year back in 2011. But I mean, when you say firefighters are trapped or if they’re in trouble, like you said, man, you’re not calling 911 because we are 911. There’s no one you’re going to call to help, so you better calm down and help yourself. There’s nobody out there that’s going to come and help you.

So that hits hard. I would say it’s a prestigious honor to be a smoke diver. I mean, just all the training they go through. I mean, I was even just researching and just, like I said, the firefighters I’ve had the good opportunity to talk to in the fire service, but there’s even some smoke diver programs that even have a pool aspect where they throw the firefighters in a pool in full bunker gear and SCBAs. Do you guys do that in your program?

Chad Miller: So we just had our first class back in March, and that is definitely… It wasn’t part of our curriculum in March, because logistically, we couldn’t find a facility to do it. But the Georgia program does it. I believe Indiana does it as well. It’ll be incorporated in our program as we get our logistics worked out. You and I have talked before that… So we had a bad winter storm come through here back in 2007, and one of the fires I went to that night, we’re in the back of this house in a pretty nice neighborhood and one of my guys literally steps off into a pool. I mean, it’s right there at the back door.

And so, you think about, “I’m never going to wind up in water in my gear.” Well yeah, you could. My wife’s family members have a house that has a pool inside the house. So it’s not uncommon to be in situations where we could get into a water scenario. Basements, elevator shafts, in all of your gear. So the purpose of all that is to literally teach our guys that, hey, stay calm, here’s a technique to get out of that gear. You can breathe, that SCBA, that apparatus will breathe underwater, even though it’s not designed to do that.

And if you stay calm and use that air that’s trapped in your gear, you’ll float. As heavy as all that stuff is when it gets wet, if you don’t panic and remain calm, you’ll stay above the water, you can keep your mask on, and you can slowly disassemble your firefighter clothing and then get yourself out of that situation.

Robert Sanchez: Yeah, when I was watching and just talking to you, Chad, I mean, it’s true. I mean, sometimes the things that you think aren’t going to happen, they happen. Like you said, if they have swimming pools in their homes and it’s dark and smokey, we all know what it’s like to be in that situation, it’s hot. And you’re crawling and you fall into a swimming pool. I mean, sometimes firefighters don’t think about that. I know the public don’t think about it. It’s just another danger that we have to be cautioned with in the fire service when you’re doing search or suppression or [crosstalk 00:24:25] …

Chad Miller: Brian and I worked the last year in the same district. And one of the buildings we have, and we actually went and did a survey, is an old hotel that’s been boarded up and the homeless people have gotten in it. And it still, to this day, has a pool on one side in the corner of the building that’s full of water. So you roll off in that thing, making a fire, pitch-black dark and you could make the wrong turn or take the wrong step, you’re neck-deep in that stuff. So it can happen. I mean, it’s a reality, a possibility, more than we probably think.

Robert Sanchez: Right.

Bryan Lloyd: Especially here in Oklahoma, Robert. I don’t know about New Mexico, but we have real bad flooding here. The weather in Oklahoma, tornadoes, every year I ask myself, “Why do I live in Oklahoma, man?” Because the weather’s just crazy. But we have real bad flooding. And then we had a line-of-duty death a few years ago. Chad was actually friends with the guy, and a drowning. So it can happen. And it’s something… Is it a one-in-a-million deal? Probably. But hey, we got a couple extra hours during the class, it’s awesome training. The military does a similar training, they call it drown-proofing. So yeah, it’s definitely… Maybe it’s one-in-a-million, maybe it helps somebody. But it’s also pretty fun too. It’s pretty cool.

Robert Sanchez: Right. Well, I mean, just watching videos sometimes or just watching the news, sometimes these small departments in the United States, it seems like, when they’re ice rescues or even river rescues, it seems like some of these departments are still wearing bunker gear. And so I mean, that training could come hand-in-hand with a department that still wears bunker gear. I’m not sure it’s the wisest thing to do, but, you still seem them out in boats or rafts in their bunker gear in the middle of a lake or whatever the case may be. So I guess that’s a situation where that training could also come in handy.

Chad Miller: Yeah, it absolutely good.

Bryan Lloyd: I mean, when we teach the… Because that’s something that we’ve actually thought, some departments around here, they were interested. And the first thing we say is, “This is not the uniform for flooding or around water.” You don’t want to be… We’re not showing you this so you can wear the gear around water. In Tulsa it’s like, PFD helmet, and then our shorts and a T-shirt. That’s what we wear on water stuff.

But yeah, like I said, we taught it around, and it’s just that one-in-a-million bad day. It’s just another tool in the toolbox. If it happens, here you go.

Robert Sanchez: Right. Absolutely. And just going back to what you said, Brian, about that New York firefighter, that rescue, I mean, that’s going to be huge news. Those guys are definitely great firefighters. We know they’re in New York, and just watching them, I mean, doing a rope rescue from the rooftop. I mean, we’ve all done rappelling and rope rescue but I mean, doing it with fire, having the chance for the rope to burn. I mean, that’s a great rescue.

Bryan Lloyd: That’s the thing about firefighters and soldiers, athletes. The regular person sees that and they’re like, “Oh, that’s horrible.” I guarantee those dudes, without even knowing them, they’re like, “Oh, hell yeah, this is awesome.” You’re waiting for that your whole career. So we love… You know what I mean? Those dudes were probably… I read a article that said one of the dudes, I think it was the guy that was hanging out. I think his name was Brian something. But he said they’d literally been practicing that technique a few hours before, that day at the station.

So is that something that we’re going to practice in Oklahoma? Yeah, actually, I mean, we do. There’s actually a little component in the smoke diver where it’s bailing out or lowering yourself down. But I promise, when I lived in New York City and I was surrounded by high rises. You know those dudes are practicing that stuff all the time. So I bet those guys were so pumped.

Robert Sanchez: Absolutely.

Bryan Lloyd: Awesome, man.

Robert Sanchez: You know that’s not their first time. I mean, you know they’ve trained a lot, quite a bit and you could tell. So those guys are definitely [crosstalk 00:28:44] …

Chad Miller: Yeah, they made it look easy, man.

Bryan Lloyd: Awesome.

Robert Sanchez: They do. It was great, man. I don’t know, I put it on record, I just watched it a couple times and it was great. So in your guys’ program, what does a firefighter need? How should they prepare to go through your guys’ program and the smoke diver program there in Oklahoma? I mean, obviously you have to be in good shape or you’re not going to pass a program. I mean, what do you suggest? Just quite a bit of running, cardio, upper-body strength?

Chad Miller: Man, so when we started our program, so we’ve trained, in about a three-year time period, Robert, we’ve taken over 20 Tulsa firefighters to Georgia. And so the first time it was me and Brian and six other guys. And we train. The one thing I can tell you, above anything else, is you have to train in your gear. Because you’re going to be in… Everything we’re going to ask you to do, including PT, you’re going to do in your gear.

So there’s a big difference between training in shorts and tennis shoes and training in bunker gear. It’s a game-changer. But our philosophy… And so, if you went and asked a Georgia guy, I think the answer would be, “Hey, find another smoke diver and they’ll tell you what you need to do.” We took a little different approach because we are a new program, and we want our… The program is hard enough all by itself. You don’t have to add any adversity to it. So we actually train… If we’re taking Tulsa guys to Georgia, we have a 17-week program. And it’s crawl, walk, run. And so we build up capacity just in regular PT gear, and then we transition to bunker gear and we break that and we go back. And then we build capacity up in our program.

But we’ve posted all of our stuff online. If you go to our Facebook page, Oklahoma Smoke Diver’s Facebook page, our 17-week program is there for anybody to see. It’s exactly what he and I both done and what we’ve trained other people to do, to go there. And all it’s going to do is physically prepare you for the course. If you show up there thinking that PT is going to get you ready, you won’t make it past the first 10 minutes. Because our PT sessions, they’re created for a purpose. They’re hard. They are difficult. And other than just about every day that you do PT, you’re going to do it in bunker gear with a pack on your back.

Bryan Lloyd: But like Chad said, the PT… And there’s all kinds of stuff out there about this program or that program, and it’s been perceived by some people that the PT is to punish people. So I can say, the one difference between Mississippi and then our program or Georgia’s or Indiana’s is, Mississippi, there’s not PT but you’re doing a lot more evolutions in the day. Mississippi’s program, which it’s awesome. There’s no teaching component. You show up, day one, you do the PT test, you hit the ground running. You’re doing eight evolutions a day. You pass or fail.

Where our programs are… So the point is, by the end of the first day, you’re in full gear, mask on all day doing all this. You’re getting tired by the end of the first day. Where our program, it’s teaching. You’re teaching more the first three days. So we had to figure out a way to get guys tired like Mississippi does, so by the day four, when we’re putting the guys through the scenarios, they’re tired. I can tell you that, I don’t know… Well, actually I do know who runs Indiana’s. Georgia and ours, we’ve got almost every guy that’s on the PT field are ex-military. We had a guy that was army ranger. Got a couple guys that were marines.

So it’s run very professionally. It’s not punishment. It’s just to get the guys fatigued, do it for about an hour, move on, we start the training. So, like Chad said, the 17-week program. But if guys get on the Facebook, what they’ll also see is it’s not all just physical fitness. We might have a day where we say, “Easy three-mile run, practice the Denver Drill.” Or practice forcible entry. We’re still incorporating skills into the training.

But the thing is, once we get past the first month or two, almost everything’s in gear. And we use the analogy of, in Oklahoma, football is the sport in Oklahoma. Almost everyone played football here. And so every group we start training, we’re like, “Hey, when you played football you started off in shorts, and then you went to pads, and then you were training in full gear in preparation for the season.” So, so many firefighters, they don’t train in their gear. They train over here, but then they show up to a house fire and they got all this stuff on and it’s a total game-changer. And you guys know this.

Just putting the gear on and your heart rate, your adrenaline. By the time you walk to the house, you’re at 110 beats per minute if you’re in shape. So if you’re not practicing and all that… It’s like the military used to say, train like you fight. That’s one of our mottoes.

Robert Sanchez: It is.

Bryan Lloyd: Now obviously, we’re wearing clean gear. We’re fortunate that we had about 50 sets donated to us that were out of date. So we’re not saying, train your frontline gear. That’s ridiculous. But we’re fortunate that we have the gear that we can let the guys wear through the training.

Robert Sanchez: Very nice. So for all the firefighters out there listening in FireFighter Kingdom, how do they apply or is there a prerequisite? How do they get into your program for those that are interested?

Chad Miller: So if they just go to our website, which is www.oklahomasmokediver.com, there’s a contact. It looks like most websites. On the top right is a contact tab, and then Brian and I’s email information is both on there and they can send either one of us an email that just says, “Hey, we’re interested in your program.” We’ll send them back a little link so they can fill out some information for us, and then we keep their info and then the next time we are getting ready to do qualification tests for a class, we’ll send them an email.

The other thing is, really, just follow us. Either on our Facebook page or our Instagram, and our links are there on our website as well. Because we put out a lot of information. Even right now, our next class won’t be until March of 2021, but we’re still putting out, “Hey, this is what we did for training today,” or, “This is something we’re doing.” So we kick a lot of information out via our social media platforms.

Robert Sanchez: Okay, great. So we have, my co-host Vince Trujillo, we have a community statement here. And sometimes when you gentlemen and I are talking firefighter stuff, and we use some lingo that maybe the public don’t understand. So we have Vince Trujillo here, he has a few questions for you guys. And so what’s going on Vince? How you doing, brother?

Vince Trujillo: All right, yeah, thanks Robert. And thanks for having you guys on, too. This has been just amazing. I loved hearing about this. So from the public perspective, I’m not going to rehash some of what Robert’s already gone through, but it sounds like this is a program that we really need nationwide for some of these firefighter areas and giving firefighters an advanced sharpening so that they can… As you were saying, you go to this advanced training, you go to this elite training, you get trained in scenarios, in your school anyways, that were maybe, you said where people had died in, firefighters had died in. And then they can take that training back to where their local fire stations.

I’m wondering, why isn’t this accredited or maybe this is supported in training because it sounds like something that would be very, very useful? I know that would have to have somebody come up with a program that everyone accepts, or… I mean, what do you think is the best use of this if you wanted to grow it?

Bryan Lloyd: So, that’s a great question. And I’m going to be a politically correct as I can, here. So Georgia, back in the day, they did it through the state, their state fire college. And the short version is, once you get it in through an accredited agency and start pushing out of the state fire college, they weren’t happy with the pass rate. And people are paying to take this course. It’s not like every fire course you go to, where everyone gets their certificate at the end. And without getting too involved with what happened to them, they want to control their program. They wanted to be able to say, “This is what we’re going to focus on.” They just wanted control of it.

So they stepped away from the college and they started a 501(c). And that’s exactly what we did. $1.50 will get you a cup of coffee, but pretty much why it’s not… We want to keep control of it. We want to be able to say, “These are the things that we’re going to train on.” And the reality is, some people don’t like that everyone doesn’t pass. And that’s a real point of contention with a lot of departments. They don’t want to pay the money and send their firefighters to the training if they’re not going to pass or get a certificate.

But the interesting thing about this program is that… And we’re new. But Georgia’s kept a lot of data. And I want to say, and Chad, correct me if I’m wrong, but over 50% of people that don’t pass, they come back. Because even the guys that were just there for a couple days, you’re learning so much that they’re coming back. So without talking all day, it’s something that could definitely benefit every state, but it’s just hard to get a collegiate, to get a college and this program maybe on the same page. They’re looking at, students are paying and they’re giving them their hours. We’re not worried about that. We’re worried about teaching firefighters things that are going to save their life.

So in a perfect world, we could marry them together. And we’re actually in a unique situation here in Tulsa where we have a partnership with the community college. And that conversation has been had of, “Hey, could we offer this?” They’re still interested in it, but once I told them the pass rate, they balked a little bit at it. So that’s the hangup right there, to answer your question.

Robert Sanchez: Well, let’s be honest. So we’ve been firefighters for awhile, right, Brian and Chad? So there’s a way sometimes that you train, and then there’s a way sometimes that you do it on the job. Sometimes that happens. And I think my research with you guys’ program, I think you guys basically are training the way you play. You know what I mean? You’re training the way you actually go out and do the job in the field. And I see that’s the way your program rolls.

Chad Miller: And then the other, probably, part of your question is this. And Brian and I have been… He’s been the chief of training, I was one of his training officers. There’s no knock on fire departments. Every fire department is going to train their new hires coming in, and they train to a standard. This training is not for everybody by any means. And it’s not a knock. Because we fight that a lot. When we were beginning this program we were going to donors. We got that question asked of us a lot. “Why isn’t this just normal training for our firefighters?”

It’s a hire level, like you said, maybe. I don’t know that I would use advanced, but when you break it down at the end of the day it’s very basic skills. We’re not teaching anyone skills that aren’t taught to them in most of your basic cadet academies. The difference that we’re applying is the physical and mental fatigue that’s being applied to them. And like I said, all of our scenarios are 1403-compliant, but we’re trying to make that learning environment as stressful as we possibly can, to recreate that stress and get them to develop some critical decision-making skills.

So what we hope is like Brian said in the beginning, is, everybody that comes through our program is going to go back home to their department and they’re going to share. And that’s how you make the impact around. Brian joked about, we’re taking the world over. That’s what we want. We want smoke divers in every state, in every department and we want them to go back and teach. But we want them to do it humbly and with the servants. Servant leadership is a big staple of our programs and…

Vince Trujillo: Go ahead.

Chad Miller: Go ahead.

Vince Trujillo: So it just sounds like that would be ideal if you could get into more states, and I guess that would just be interesting to see how that could happen. And I think you are, maybe not advanced or elite and you want to be humble about it, I think the line-of-duty training is exceptional way of, let’s look at the biggest mistakes or maybe some of the biggest scenarios we’ve heard from, and then you train people up on that. That sounds just like a great thing to do, and I think that would just be very beneficial if you had that in more states. Do you have any plans on how to get that in more states, or do you have some kind of outline of that?

Chad Miller: So our program, if you look at the United States, we’re obviously the furthest west. We’re calling it the Midwestern Division, if you will. But luckily, when we had our first class, we had candidates from six states come to our qualification. Oklahoma, Texas, New Mexico, Kansas, Mississippi, or Missouri, and Arkansas. And when we graduated our class in March, we put the first smoke diver in Missouri. We put the first smoke diver in Arkansas. We added smoke divers in Kansas, Texas and Oklahoma.

So we’re slowly moving our way across the country. And anyone from the U.S. can come to our program. Like I said, Georgia has guys from Idaho, Oklahoma, Indiana. We’ve got a guy from Wisconsin. We’re spread out everywhere. So the goal is just to keep pushing and maybe somebody comes through our program from New Mexico and goes back and says, “Hey, I want to start a smoke diver program.” That’s the way it expands.

Vince Trujillo: Okay, that sounds great. So last question, thanks for everything you all do and the training that you have been going through, and trying to grow this. I think it’s an exceptional program, I’d like to hear more. So I made a mistake, actually. I actually talk to these guys and I called them smoke jumpers, and they said, “We’re not smoke jumpers.” So this is the stuff when I’m working with Robert now, I make mistakes like that. I don’t want to mess up someone’s rank or anything, but I do that all the time. So for those listening out there, smoke divers, that’s particular to your program or the group of states that you have? They all call themselves smoke divers?

Bryan Lloyd: Yeah. So, whenever I went through the program in 2003… I’m a big research nerd. I like to read, so I tried to track down, “Okay, why smoke divers?” Because at the time, my dad was living in Montana. They have the smoke jumpers there. So I have a smoke diver shirt, and everyone would assume I jump out of planes. Now so many people ask I just say, “Yeah, I jump out of planes.”

But basically, I heard from some older guys that have been through it, was firefighters used to just dive off into the smoke when they rolled up to a fire. Dive off into it. Jump off into it, dive off into it. Smoke divers. That’s how it was explained to me. So yeah, man. But yeah, I’ve been asked probably 100 times if I jump out of planes and now I just say, “Yep.” It’s easier than going into a half-hour explanation [crosstalk 00:45:49] firefighter.

Robert Sanchez: Exactly. It’s better. Especially if you don’t have time, just say, “Yeah, I jump out of planes.”

Vince Trujillo: Hey, thanks so much for having you guys on. I appreciate that. So, if people want to know how… So some of the firefighters listen, like Robert said. You had the website. Who should apply and how does that help you expand it into your state? So someone should apply who not only wants to test themselves, go through the rigor of it, have a challenge, but also have a servant attitude and someone who may want to bring that school to their own state? Is that who should be applying right now? What’s your pitch to some of these people listening?

Bryan Lloyd: Initially, Georgia, their informal policy was they wanted guys with, I think they used to say, two to three years on. But we want guys and girls that have been on long enough that learned how to be a firefighter. Would it help you coming straight from cadet school? Yeah, you’re still going to learn. But have a year or two or three years. Have a couple years on and get in the groove. You need to learn your job first, focus on that.

And then it’s really all of the things that you said, Vince. If you just want to tighten up your game or if you’ve got a servant’s heart and you want to go and bring this stuff back. Or maybe you’ve got a dream of bringing the program to your state. I can tell you this. I joke with the guys in Georgia that had we known how much work was involved, I don’t know that we would have done it. But once we started, it was like most firemen. It’s the challenge. “Oh, okay, you think I can’t do it? Well, watch this.”

But this program, it’s been a labor of love. No one gets paid. That’s another cool thing. I want to give props to our first class. We had, I don’t know, 80 instructors from Georgia, somewhere around there. We had instructors from Texas, all over the place. They all came into Tulsa for free. The Georgia guys, again, they compile data. It actually cost all the Georgia guys, I don’t know, I think it was 50 grand or something in all the time they took off and shift trades and getting covered. They all came on their own. No one’s getting paid.

That’s what’s so awesome about this program and why I love it so much, is we’re around like-minded people that… We’re here because we want to make the fire service better. So if that sounds interesting, or you want to just challenge yourself. All of the above, Vince. It’s anyone and everyone. You can benefit from this program.

Vince Trujillo: All right, yeah. Thank you all for being on so much. If everyone needs to get some information give us the website one more time.

Chad Miller: It’s https://ift.tt/3kmgbp6.

Vince Trujillo: All right, thanks so much guys. I’m going to turn it over to Robert now. I appreciate you on.

Robert Sanchez: So, all right, Chad and Brian. Well hey, it was an honor to have you guys on, man, and it was a treat for sure just to have you guys on. And I enjoy talking to firefighters all across the United States and that’s why I enjoyed being a PEP instructor also with Chad and just learning about things that are out there. Sometimes I think firefighters just don’t know everything that’s out there, and there’s a lot of things to learn. And your program seems like a good program.

One thing I think’s going to sell your guys’ program is just being that you teach your students to be humble when they go back to their community. And you encourage them to train the other firefighters on the techniques that you guys provide in your program, so I think that’s great. So again, thank you very much. Share us on your Facebook and we’ll put you guys in the FireFighter Kingdom Facebook also. And we’ll go from there. And again, Brian and Chad, thank you. It’s been a great time and some good information to share with the firefighters in the United States.

Bryan Lloyd: Thanks for having us on, man [crosstalk 00:49:45].

Chad Miller: Thanks for having us, man. It’s going to help our program and the more exposure we get, who knows? Maybe we’ll have four or five dudes from New Mexico in the next one. Because that’d be awesome.

Robert Sanchez: Absolutely. And yeah, when I’m next time in Oklahoma, man, I’ll meet up with you and Chad and we’ll have a cold one [crosstalk 00:49:57].

Bryan Lloyd: Oh yeah, for sure man.

Robert Sanchez: Me and Chad know what that’s like, right Chad?

Chad Miller: For sure.

Bryan Lloyd: All right, thanks again, bro [crosstalk 00:50:02].

Robert Sanchez: Have a good one, man. Thank you guys.

Bryan Lloyd: All right, later man.

Robert Sanchez: All right. Signing off from FireFighter Kingdom, Robert Sanchez, your host, and my cohost, producer Vince Trujillo. We’ll see you until next time.

Vince Trujillo: Hey, and everybody who’s listening right now, make sure you go to Apple Podcast, Spotify, you can also go to www.FireFighterKingdom.com. Check out our Facebook page too, FireFighter Kingdom, and we’ll see you on the next episode.

Robert Sanchez: Thank you.

The post #13 Oklahoma Smoke Divers – Elite FireFighter Training & Why It Matters appeared first on The FireFighter Kingdom Podcast.

from FireFighter Kingdom https://ift.tt/33vB22h

#FFK

[kelphero47]

The Marvelous Adventures of Echo Zane - Chapter 7

Another chapter for whoever is still reading this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was safe to say that setting down the Bounty somewhere outside Ninjago City would have been a better idea than trying to avoid crushing cars in their current situation. The group had decided to go shopping since they were running low on food and other necessities. Nya was at the controls as Cole and Kai lent over the rails on deck giving her directions, yet somehow even with three people involved the task was no easy feat. Echo was certain they had already scratched five cars.  

Nya huffed in annoyance as her said 'left' yet again before saying 'right a little', this was getting old. Before either of the ninja on deck could say anything, she cut power to the engines allowing the ship to finally rest on the ground (squeezed between a couple of cars). She may have heard the sound of at least six car alarms go off as the ship shook the ground but she chose to ignore it.

The Ninja gathered on the deck together in a line with Echo standing behind his brother. Wu stood in front of them, "We all know how this goes. We shop for what we need then leave, quietly, and try not to destroy the store... Again." Echo already knew the story of what happened at the graciously named, 'Battle of Bargain Bin', in which the Ninja had accidently wrecked the store after another group of teens insulted Kai and then put gum in his hair. They hadn't been allowed back since, mostly because the store was still trying to repair the giant hole in the roof.

The group nodded, with Kai looking sheepish at the mention of said mishap, and left the ship quietly. They stood in front of the store as Lloyd spoke seriously, "We all now our missions?"

"Me and Cole are on sanitary duty." Kai looked over the list he'd been given, why they needed so many different soaps was beyond him.

"And snacks!" Cole added enthusiastically as he held up another list of his own, this one somehow longer than Kai's.

"Echo and I will be handling groceries." Zane smiled as Echo nodded in response, the younger being distracted by all of the people passing the group. He still wasn't used to big crowds.

"That leaves Jay and I to get everything else." Nya held up their list, turns out 'everything else' wasn't all that much.  

Jay took the list from her hand the glance over it quickly, "Who wrote 'coffee machine'? I thought we already had one, did someone break it?" He looked over his friends questioningly.

"I broke it by accident." Cole admitted quietly before continuing, "I was trying to make coffee and my hand kept going intangible so I ended slapping it off the counter." The others fell into an awkward silence at his admittance, making the black ninja shuffle nervously.

Lloyd cleared his throat to get back on subject, "Anyway, since we all know what we're doing we should get going."

"Wait, what are you doing Lloyd?" Echo asked as the green ninja turned away from the group.

"I've gotta get this stuff for Sensei at the store down the street, so I'll see you guys later." Lloyd replied holding up his own list. He left the others to watch him cross the street and disappear behind another building. None of them really knew what to say so they left it alone and instead proceeded to finally go inside.

The store itself was quiet. The few people that were milling about moved at slow, relaxed paces as they went about their tasks. Without much prompting the remaining Ninja split up leaving Echo and Zane on their own with their shopping cart. Echo took the job of pushing it alongside his brother as the older gathered the items on the list and instructed him where to go next. The pair fell into a comfortable quiet, exchanging words only when needed, as they shopped.

After a while Echo lost interest in just solely looking at the cart and the various objects placed in it. There was so much to look at in the store that he just couldn't help but wander off, if only for a moment.  He stepped cautiously down the aisle and moved into the next. With how quiet the room was he could faintly hear the sound of a generic pop song playing in the background, which given his solo circumstance was actually kind of unnerving.  

Turning yet another corner into the next aisle Echo chanced upon a lady struggling to reach something from the top shelf. Echo watched for a moment as she gripped the edge of the shelf, as if to try and boost herself up. Not wanting to allow her to struggle he closed the gap between them to reach over her head for the can she had been reaching for. She gave a huff returning to her normal height as Echo held out the can in front of her.

Echo smiled apologetically as she took the can from him. "I apologise if my actions insulted you in any way, but you seemed to be struggling."

The lady laughed waving him off, "No harm done, I appreciate the help. My wife usually grabs the stuff from the top shelf but she ran off earlier. Leaving me with half a shopping list." She gestured to the basket on her arm, "Most of it was on the lower shelves. The name's Jean and you are..."

"Echo, it is very nice to meet you." He held out his hand which she shook slowly.

"Say, have I seen you somewhere?"

"Most likely, my brother is one of the Ninja." He watched as her face lit up with recognition.

"Oh yeah, the white one. My nephew loves them." She nodded, then looked at the list in her hand frowning.

"Is something the matter?" Echo spoke in concern as Jean shook her head.

"It's nothing..." She sighed before glancing at the top shelf, "I'd hate to bother you but... Would you mind helping me with some of this?"

"I would be happy to help."

**With Zane**

He had only turned for a second. A second. Echo was gone. His little brother was missing in a place where who knows what could happen. He'd been pacing next to the cart of who knows how long before he was suddenly jerked back into reality by the realisation that his foot was stuck. Frozen in ice, to be more precise. "Okay..." He spoke to himself taking in shaky breaths, "Okay... Just calm down... And breath."

After a couple of seconds of listening to his own instructions and doing just that he watched PIXAL pop up at the edge of his vision. She looked worried, reaching out in front of her as if she wanted to comfort him, and he smiled in return. They fell into a comforting silence for a while before the sound of someone walking quickly came from around the corner. The sound was followed by the appearance of Kai and Cole skidding past the corner entirely and out of Zane's line of sight. The couple smiled as the pair came back into view nearly tripping over themselves.

Cole was nearly hidden under a mountain of soap, hair products and various kinds of snacks while Kai leant on the side of the cart. Neither ninja spoke for a minute as they caught their breath. Kai was the first the recover looking at Zane worriedly, "You okay man? I felt it get cold in here for a second and thought you might be in trouble."

"I could use some help..." Zane gestured to his still frozen feet, "I let my emotions get the better of me for a moment."

"Woah, what happened?" Cole asked as Kai moved to thaw out his friend's lower legs.

"Echo is missing."

"Wait, what?!"

**Back with Echo and Jean**

"So, you're telling me you lived on an island by yourself for months and never considered leaving until last month?" Jean questioned as they wandered through the aisles. They'd discussed various things, including Jean's wife among other things, and were now onto talking about Echo's life. The android nodded silently, not really knowing what to say. The pair fell into a tense quiet as he passed her another thing off the list, almost jerking away in fright when she spoke again. "Why?"

"I... Um... Just didn't really question my father's departure and rather chose to accept it." He looked at the floor in interest, somehow unwilling to look at her.

"What about a mother or something?"

"Well, there was Gizmo but he wasn't much for conversation. I'd compare him more to a dog but don't tell him I said that..." Echo explained growing quieter with every word, "I never actually had a mother." He finished as a whisper, feeling that lump in his throat he'd previously felt at the interview. He finally looked up at her to see Jean smiling sadly at him with tears forming in the corners of her eyes.  

She reached out to pat him on the head lightly before enveloping him in a hug, "Well if it makes you any better, I'd be happy to be your mom." She whispered back pulling back to look him in the face and let out a small laugh as Echo stood there in shock. "Well technically you'd have two moms since there's my wife, who you still have to meet."

"Okay..." He nodded at her drastic change in emotions, humans were so confusing sometimes. Yet the thought of having more people to call him family made somewhere inside him radiate with warmth.

"Oh, I just had a lovely idea! We should have you round for dinner someday, I make a mean Mac n' Cheese." She nudged him playfully in the side with her elbow making them both laugh, "You'd have to ask your brother of course."  

Those words brought all of his other thoughts to a grinding halt. He has completely forgotten about Zane and the others. What if they'd already left? Finished their shopping and went back to the Bounty without him. The idea didn't sound like something they'd do but they hadn't come to find him yet so... What if they had? The thought made Echo's legs feel less stable, as if someone had replaced them with paper. His distress must have been written on his face because Jean was shaking his shoulder to try and snap him out of his own thoughts. "You okay?"

Echo spoke shakily as if his voice wanted to match how his legs felt, "I'm fine... I just expected to see Zane by now, and..."

"And?"

"Do you think they left without me?" He felt stupid for saying it out loud, his fears were completely unfounded but somehow he just couldn't help it. Echo put his head in hands as his legs finely gave out allowing him to sink to the floor. Jean followed him down as she kneeled in front of him, she smiled at him despite everything. "It's okay to doubt things you know." Echo looked up from his hands at her statement, "Like people do it all the time, it means we have insecurities... Fears. I'm no psychologist but I think it's sweet that you care enough about your family that you're afraid of losing them."

"Really?" Echo seemed unconvinced.

"Of course, why else would you be on the floor of a not too busy store with me otherwise. Besides from what you've told me about your brother he's probably in here looking for you right now." Jean spoke as she got up and dusted herself off. Not knowing what else to do Echo followed her lead with standing up before she patted him on the shoulder. "Now, since you helped me I think it's only fair I help you. And so... We're gonna find your brother."

"You don't-"

"Pfft, no buts." With that she looped her arm around his and with a surprising amount of strength began dragging him down the aisle. "Now if I was a ninja where would I be?"

Echo took a moment to recover from yet another drastic change in emotions from the other. Feelings are so complicated. Yet he found comfort in the fact she was willing to help him and smiled, "Produce."

**With Zane, Cole and Kai**

The three sped through the store Zane hastily grabbing items from his list while Cole tried to sneak more things into his cart without Kai noticing, the second task being easier than the first with the fire ninja more preoccupied with finding Echo. They'd already had to stop him from climbing on the shelves to get a better view, Zane insisting they wouldn't be able to support his weight. So they settled for speed walking past people to cover as much of the store as they could.

"Do you see him?" Cole asked as Kai looked around the corner into the next aisle.

"No..." Kai sighed putting his hand under his chin in thought, "I don't get it. We've checked everyone aisle and he isn't anywhere."

"Perhaps it would be wise if we stayed in one placed and waited for him to come to us." Zane suggested crossing off things on his list, "Since I have finished my portion of the shopping there is no reason for us to move now anyway."

"I guess it could work." The trio stood there waiting for something to happen, the low chatter of the store surrounded them. Cole began humming as the minutes went by this then developed into tapping his foot, patting the side of the cart and nearly reached him singing before Kai cleared his throat beside him. The earth ninja sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, "Sorry." They fell into a quiet again, Cole still lightly tapping his foot.

Zane however was focused on his surroundings as he glanced up and down the aisle they were currently situated in. An overly excited female voice caught his attention as another meeker voice replied in kind, a voice resembling his own if not slightly gravelly due to the lower grade speakers used in his construction. He watched in tense anticipation as a duo came from a nearby aisle wrapped in a conversation, despite it seeming quite one-sided.

Echo giggled at Jean's story as the two of them walked through the store. She was about to continue when she gasped. He was going to ask if she was alright but instead focused on the direction she was looking. Jean was staring at none other than Zane, as the nindroid stood beside a pair of packed shopping carts along the ninjas of earth and fire (both of whom seeming very bored).

Neither android hesitated in moving towards each other to meet in the middle for a hug, before Zane quickly pulled away to inspect his brother for injuries. Echo smiled at Zane's protective nature as he was given a thorough look over only to brought back into another hug. They parted for the second time as an 'aww' sound was let out behind Echo. They both turned to see Jean smiling at them and shyly waving as they focused on her.

Zane glanced between his brother and the strange until finally settling on Echo, "Where have you been? Do you know how worried I've been?"

Echo smiled sheepishly as he looked at Jean, "I've been helping Jean with her shopping. I'm sorry for wandering off..." Zane sighed as Echo watched her walk over at the mention of her name.

"It's my fault really, your brother was helping me reach the top shelves." Jean admitted, "But he's safe and sound, I promise."

"I can see that", Zane patted Echo on the shoulder. "Thank you for watching him, things like this don't happen this often."

"It was no problem, a pleasure in fact. He's a helpful young man, you should be quite proud."

"I am." Zane smiled admiringly at Echo as the android gave his best impression of a pout. "We best be going now, thank you again." Zane turned to leave while Echo gave Jean a small wave goodbye.

"Oh wait!" Jean made them pause as she pulled out her shopping list and a pen from her pocket. "Almost forgot... This is my phone number, if Echo ever wants to come around when you guys are busy just call." She handed the slip of paper to Zane, "I'm usually free." The ice ninja nodded before leaving with his brother to meet up with Kai and Cole, who were sitting on the floor waiting.  

Kai looked up at the pair before glancing quickly behind them to see Jean leaving as well. He smiled at Echo, "Looks like someone made a new friend." Echo nodded to himself thinking, 'And maybe something closer'.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shopping is the best and worst thing ever.

Until next time...

#ninjago #echo zane #zane julien #ninjago kai #oc #ninjago cole #ninjago pixal

[risysir]

Reply

wendyOctober 11, 2012 at 12:12 pm ∞Reply

AlecDecember 15, 2012 at 7:41 pm ∞Reply

Timothydean Clark!March 12, 2013 at 6:05 am ∞Reply

JKTJune 22, 2013 at 7:16 am ∞Reply

JaySeptember 26, 2013 at 6:43 am ∞Reply

manuelOctober 13, 2013 at 2:58 pm ∞Reply

michaelNovember 21, 2013 at 1:53 pm ∞Reply

RheaNovember 25, 2013 at 10:54 am ∞Reply

handsomeDecember 6, 2013 at 9:44 pm ∞Reply

FerryDecember 8, 2013 at 8:02 am ∞Reply

sergeyJanuary 31, 2014 at 11:28 pm ∞Reply

Azn dudeFebruary 18, 2014 at 4:35 pm ∞Reply

azn n dapantsMarch 12, 2014 at 12:29 am ∞Reply

DavidMarch 20, 2014 at 12:18 am ∞Reply

DavidMarch 20, 2014 at 4:54 pm ∞Reply

DavidMarch 20, 2014 at 7:20 pm ∞Reply

meApril 1, 2014 at 2:14 pm ∞Reply

Mario David Alvarado AmayaMay 15, 2014 at 3:36 pm ∞Reply

SleepyMay 31, 2014 at 4:59 am ∞Reply

tylerJuly 29, 2014 at 4:07 pm ∞Reply

edwardNovember 6, 2014 at 9:11 pm ∞Reply

edwardNovember 6, 2014 at 9:14 pm ∞Reply

JamesDecember 31, 2014 at 9:46 pm ∞Reply

MikeJanuary 16, 2015 at 9:48 pm ∞Reply

KevinJanuary 24, 2015 at 11:44 pm ∞Reply

SteveFebruary 22, 2015 at 4:02 am ∞Reply

KevinApril 13, 2015 at 9:45 am ∞Reply

KevinApril 16, 2015 at 12:40 pm ∞Reply

Lawrence RallsMay 16, 2015 at 2:20 am ∞Reply

Brad NichelsonMay 25, 2015 at 10:07 am ∞Reply

QuisMay 27, 2015 at 10:35 pm ∞Reply

WillJune 12, 2015 at 8:30 pm ∞Reply

the readerJune 23, 2015 at 9:29 pm ∞Reply

JCJuly 4, 2015 at 3:26 am ∞Reply

DonBravaJuly 7, 2015 at 7:59 pm ∞Reply

brianJuly 14, 2015 at 9:31 pm ∞Reply

PaulJuly 15, 2015 at 3:06 am ∞Reply

RandyJuly 22, 2015 at 10:26 am ∞Reply

BillAugust 7, 2015 at 7:13 am ∞Reply

jon snowAugust 7, 2015 at 9:41 am ∞Reply

Karen HsuAugust 24, 2015 at 8:22 am ∞Reply

RobSeptember 17, 2015 at 2:10 am ∞Reply

cryptblood1986October 8, 2015 at 7:20 am ∞Reply

DavidOctober 14, 2015 at 12:54 pm ∞Reply

donteOctober 23, 2015 at 1:28 am ∞Reply

TimNovember 7, 2015 at 10:34 pm ∞Reply

jordieNovember 8, 2015 at 9:20 pm ∞Reply

OniallNovember 9, 2015 at 5:53 pm ∞Reply

EdgarNovember 18, 2015 at 2:16 pm ∞Reply

Jskuu1November 22, 2015 at 1:08 pm ∞Reply

Geraldo MasonNovember 29, 2015 at 3:20 pm ∞Reply

MattDecember 6, 2015 at 7:07 pm ∞Reply

DannyJanuary 1, 2016 at 10:33 pm ∞Reply

IvnJanuary 2, 2016 at 2:34 am ∞Reply

IvnJanuary 2, 2016 at 2:35 am ∞Reply

ScottJanuary 3, 2016 at 7:51 pm ∞Reply

GeoJanuary 10, 2016 at 11:18 pm ∞Reply

KevinJanuary 28, 2016 at 3:20 pm ∞Reply

TruthtellerFebruary 13, 2016 at 4:28 pm ∞Reply

Steve lloydFebruary 29, 2016 at 3:01 am ∞Reply

Mega SelfianaMarch 8, 2016 at 12:42 am ∞Reply

Hans HuberMarch 14, 2016 at 11:57 pm ∞Reply

Hans HuberMarch 15, 2016 at 12:00 am ∞Reply

nu.mai.sunt.la.modăMarch 16, 2016 at 6:19 am ∞Reply

PalenakaMarch 17, 2016 at 6:42 pm ∞

love this post! i think it’s tricky because when someone goes to hit on you at a bar, it’s essentially because they found something about your looks intriguing (and race does play into the way you work, clearly), but why they think a racial pick-up line would work is beyond me.

Fermin GualFebruary 23, 2015 at 11:07 pm ∞Reply

harrysanOctober 13, 2015 at 8:47 pm ∞Reply

I am a Hispanic man, not dark of skin; but not white (far from it). I could relate to the dilema you face. Personally: I like Asian Women, not because they are physically different; but because they are more loyal than 90% of the other women.

wcMay 30, 2015 at 9:42 am ∞

charleyOctober 17, 2015 at 4:01 pm ∞

You like Asian women because “they are more loyal than 90% of the other women.”?

Isn’t this exactly what she is railing against? More loyal then 90% of what other women? You’ve obviously never been to a Thai hostess bar have you?

Way to completely miss the point of the article lol

You mean I should talk to Asian girls just like I would any other girl?

Radical concept……but that’s what you’re saying right?

I moved to Vancouver a number of years ago from hickville Nfld. The only Asians I had seen outside of TV were at a Chinese restaurant 150 miles away. Moving to Vancouver….well….law of averages says I’ll date at least 1 Asian girl….I dated a few actually, and ended up marrying a Japanese girl 13 years ago.

She liked that I didn’t know shit about Japan, or try to relate things to her ethnicity. The fact was, her family had been Canadian for several generations, and mine, only 2. So she was more Canadian than me,

She liked that I didn”t always talk about the fact she was japanese…and she thought my “never give up” attitude towards chopsticks endearing.

Bravo! i love how u’re not only pointing out the issue but also presenting these guys with solutions. In my opinion, these guys simply don’t know what to say, so they pick a characteristic that’s seen right of the bat AND what they presume would be unique and relatable. Except they’re really not that original or appropriate.

Thank you for the tips; I appreciate your candor. I always gravitate towards Asian girls and tend to ask about their specific ethnicity, because I am fascinated by the struggles that Asian-American girls faced growing up in America. The question is not part of my one-line pick ups that I default to in hopes that It will ignite a desire for me. Email me if you’d like to continue this conversation; I’d like pick your brain on this topic.

AradFebruary 15, 2015 at 4:41 pm ∞Reply

Soren Fde HolmOctober 29, 2015 at 1:00 pm ∞Reply

jordieNovember 8, 2015 at 9:22 pm ∞Reply

Can we go on a date

So fucking what? you can get past most of woman’s bullchit simply by NOT caring what they think. 4.3 billion asian people in the world . half are woman. thinking about what she like or don’t like is the first mistake you make while approaching a woman.Just move on ;)

GOD THIS IS A SAD ATTEMPT LOL

Thanks Chin for your advice i’ll try it out soon and see where it gets me although i’m one of those guys unfortunately who find all Asian women simply irresistible and desirable and I melt in there presence. I’m a warm hearted and very pollite guy but get lost at first base. Incidentally got any girlfriends in Sydney Australia I could practice with. Love the colour of your hair in the pic above you look a bit clique but none the less amazing.

I like how the last two comments are guys trying to act interested so they can hit on you or a friend.

dailychinupsNovember 25, 2013 at 12:54 pm ∞Reply

Ha yep. They help prove my point so I leave those comments on here.

Jskuu1November 22, 2015 at 2:00 pm ∞

“Yea e-mail me so i can pick your brain as well!!!” Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah…. my first comment about guys not shouldnt use racial pickup lines and that being common sense, yea i take that back!!!’ Most guys have no clue what to say so they say the first thing that pops in to their head and don’t even think if it is offensive, racist, or even tasteful. Reading some of these comments deff give guys a bad name all over… but they are deff entertaining

So this is a white girl in an Asian body, lost count on them a while back. In general some girls are worth talking while the rest are over decorated feces. The reason why out of every 100 girls one talks to only 15% are good candidates lol.

dailychinupsNovember 25, 2013 at 12:53 pm ∞Reply

Don’t pretend like you know me, and how dare you call me a white girl. It must be fun for you to hide cowardly behind an anonymous account and leaving hateful comments on the internet for people who try to provide helpful genuine points of view and share a piece of their real opinions.

Your dumb comments just serve as evidence why I felt like I needed to write articles on this subject.

“So this is an ignorant internet bully, disguised as an expert on the subject. Lost count on them a while back. In general, some people are worth my time while the rest are haters with no lives.”

JohnDecember 4, 2013 at 4:53 pm ∞

JayDecember 5, 2013 at 6:00 pm ∞

dailychinupsDecember 9, 2013 at 11:30 am ∞

JayMarch 23, 2014 at 5:53 pm ∞

dailychinupsMarch 24, 2014 at 7:45 am ∞

JayMarch 24, 2014 at 7:29 pm ∞

mikeMay 25, 2015 at 4:59 am ∞

JamesNovember 22, 2015 at 2:14 pm ∞

Nothing wrong with being white. But I can see why you’re offended

I didn’t pretend to know anything about you, you easily gave that away.

” Your dumb comments just serve as evidence why I felt like I needed to write articles on this subject.”

No, you do this because you have nothing else going and vent your frustrations here online for others to comment and critique. Nothing coward about that or it seems you can’t face criticism and only expect positive feedback to make yourself feel justified.

I don’t see were I put expert in my original post ( You made that up) Ignorant? Please specify Internet bully? I just gave you the flip side on your article in a fraction of the size

Haters with no lives? First I don’t have a reason to hate you or hate on you, second yes I do have a very busy life style. (see how long it took me to reply back to you?) So you just enjoy the rest of the day :)

Honey, I took 2 months to reply to your first comment. I think it’s time you learn some basic math. http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2013-10/enhanced/webdr05/24/13/anigif_enhanced-buzz-7251-1382635074-27.gif

You are not cute and can’t act cute I have talked to women with more common sense and look beyond what your limited thoughts bring out of you.

I’m going to borrow the wise words of Erin Gloria Ryan a writer from Jezebel here: “You may not agree with a woman, but to criticize her appearance — as opposed to her ideas or actions — isn’t doing anyone any favors, least of all you. Insulting a woman’s looks when they have nothing to do with the issue at hand implies a lack of comprehension on your part, an inability to engage in high-level thinking. You may think she’s ugly, but everyone else thinks you’re an idiot.”

¿Ugly? ¿Idiot? Well anyone has and will be doing idiotic things from time to time, all humans do that (you are no exception). But far from that you are now being childish and stupid, it seems you have very big issues and take it to heart when your views are placed into question. Your responses are nothing more but desperate moves to make yourself think you are on top, who are you really kidding? Yourself? You enjoy your evening.

Dear: You should not even feed into that negativity….. pls don’t stoop to their level!!! I’m very attracted to Asian women and I find myself at lost for words to strike a conversation so I just don’t say anything and I know its my loss if you don’t have nothing nice to say to people….. then don’t say anything!!!!!

Way to keep a cool head… don’t let assholes stop you from you from writing on any topics with genuine intentions… and im from Phiily so Im not saing these things to get into your pants… you just seem like a helpful, caring person and i wouldnt wanna see retarded assholes change the way you are or stop you from trying to help people or writing on any topic that you have genuine feelings toward for fear of what a few immature or ignorant idiots that like to hide behind keyboards

Why would you help the dumbasses pick up girls your interfering with a possible upward trend in the gene pools. Jkin there’s really now way to predict shifts in prevalent traits / attitudes but I r bored.

Hi, i live in Norway, i have a chinese girlfreind (in china) i have traveled there several times, month away 6 weeks home, you only get one 30 day visa at a time, I fell very in love with her beacause she is great kind and wonderfull person, nothing else, any girl can be this, not matter her racial origins, it is so wrong to make rude remarks to a nice girl and try to pick her up with lewd comments about ethnic origins, this auther is too kind to explain to the idiots what they are doing wrong,

Michael PriceFebruary 15, 2015 at 6:18 am ∞Reply

Hi, how did you meet your girlfriend, and howbased is best way to meet a lovely Chinese girl when I’m London based?

Michael PriceFebruary 15, 2015 at 6:38 am ∞

Sorry for the poor English grammar

So my boyfriend confessed to me that he likes the fact I’m Asian, because he thinks that Asian girls are raised to be and better at keeping themselves fit and healthy. He points to the fact that I’m always conscious about eating enough green veggies and not afraid of trying other weird-looking dishes. At the same time, I’m not going to starve myself. We met each other at a dance club, which keeps us both pretty active.

I wonder what you think of this stereotype? Is there some truth to it or is it just as aggravating as the other “Giants-fan” stereotypes you go into detail in your Yellow Fever article on bolditalic? And what would you think and say about the man who admits these prejudices?

dailychinupsNovember 25, 2013 at 12:46 pm ∞Reply

Hi Rhea,

I mean it sounds like your boyfriend just likes you for who you are. You are healthy, fit, and adventurous not because you’re Asian. You just are. Being Asian is definitely a big and important part of our identity. Why shouldn’t your boyfriend like that you’re Asian?

My main issues with Yellow Fever are when men expect certain behavior/personality out of Asian girls, and then they get mad when we aren’t like that, or when they don’t spend the time and effort to get to know and understand Asian women as unique individuals. Your boyfriend doesn’t sound like he does either of those things to me.

I think it’s healthy that he admits his preferences to you openly. He’s not trying to hide anything from you. Unless he makes gross generalizations about Asian women or force you to act a certain way, I wouldn’t worry about it.

Thanks for leaving this thoughtful comment!

P.S. I love dancing too! :)

EliApril 28, 2015 at 3:30 pm ∞

Hello, I think you shirked it with Rhea…. Why?

” So my boyfriend confessed to me that he likes the fact I’m Asian, because he thinks that Asian girls are raised to be and better at keeping themselves fit and healthy. He points to the fact that I’m always conscious about eating enough green veggies and not afraid of trying other weird-looking dishes”

That is a silly utterance and a self serving one from her boyfriend! So only Asian girls eat healthily and are best at keeping themselves healthy? I completely disagree. I like Asian girls but it is not due to them being healthier than other races or being fitter, nope, they most certainly are not :) That fella displays a serious case of jaundice.

If I was in the market for a girlfriend, I’d simply travel to Asia. I’m there most of the time and I like the fact that the girls there lack the baggage and insecurities that weighs down British Asian girls or Asian Americans etc. An example of this is BBC, ABC, CBC?

I hasten to add colour does not come into it but you stand accused of not dealing the brothers in :)

twinkie

dailychinupsDecember 9, 2013 at 11:27 am ∞Reply

Of course, any Asian Americans who speak out against Asian American stereotyping must be a twinkie because there’s no way that Asian Americans are unique individuals just like everyone else, right? http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2013-10/enhanced/webdr01/24/11/anigif_enhanced-buzz-4532-1382629227-29.gif

Hi, I live in The Netherlands and I am myself also from Asia. To be specifically from Indonesia. I am now a woman though, so I cannot talk from experience what you describe. I have been living here all my life , I was adopted when I was 4 months old. I have a brother and sister that were adopted too from the same city where I was born, but they have different biological parents. Your story is really great in that it shows how stupid American guys can be. Here in my country people are very open-minded and they tend to look inside the person rather than the outside. Dutch men are in general interested in other people when they found out, especially when they have contact with them for a longer time, for example at work. My experience is that Asian people in Europe, but certainly in my country have no hard time about what you describe. Of course, there are guys like you describe, but they are really a big minority. Nowadays its harder te be from muslim origin than from Asian origin.

I find nothing bad about men trying to pick you up in such way.First of all, the path to the girls pants is the main target,and there is no single way for it. Some asian girls find it racist if they attract white boys because they are asian. The other will tell you that you are an ass…ole because you don’t appreciate their cultural background. And so on. The point is it is wrong to use such cheap pickups, and it is also wrong to judge guys in such way. Maybe he was shy and didn’t know what to tell you,so he uses the old way. When I go to Asia, I am not offenden when girls approach me just because I am white or have money. If somebody wants my buritto, then I don’t care about the reason they like me and why they approach me in this way,as long as I like that person.

P.s michael Man, we will see how you talk in a year or 3, after you are divorced and broke. And your girlfriend is hanging out with Sebastian de la guerta on Hawaii )).

I don’t see what is so wrong or offensive about an Asian guy wanting to know your exact ethnicity. I do it all the time and the Asian girls I ask don’t mind it. Be proud of whatever ethnicity you are, and that question won’t bother you anymore.

Ni hao ma? Means “how are you?” not hi lol

dailychinupsMarch 20, 2014 at 9:02 am ∞Reply

I’m fluent in Mandarin and Traditional Chinese, so thanks for the unnecessary lesson.

the guy who said “another white girl stuck in an Asian girl body” was spot on. you are an Asian girl who wants to be a white American chick. why deny it? and you all have a sick fetish for white dudes…why is that not wrong for you? oh it is just a “preference” come on…admit your shit too.

dailychinupsMarch 20, 2014 at 9:07 am ∞Reply

Stop putting words in my mouth that I never said. You don’t know me but if you read my other blog entries or author info, you’d see that I am not “trying to be white American” and I do not have a “fetish for white dudes.” What laughable ideas.

Why don’t you admit that you’re an internet bully who thinks he has the right to make rude and judgmental comments without bothering to really read my writings?

haha…you call everyone who calls you out a “internet bully”. jeesus. really?

dailychinupsMarch 20, 2014 at 5:19 pm ∞Reply

You said “you all have a sick fetish for white dudes” about Asian American women. I’m out in the open writing about my real personal experiences on the Internet with my full name, background, contact info, and pictures associated with my identity. Meanwhile, you hide cowardly behind just one first name and an e-mail address making negative sweeping generations about me and women supposedly just like me. That is what internet bullies do. Look it up because I’m not going to waste any more time on you.

“generations”? or generalizations? wow..every ignorant brat have a blog now. smh

nameless internet bullyMarch 23, 2014 at 10:25 am ∞Reply

wow

I just had to comment on this. I LOVE LOVE LOVE your post!!! ;) I can honestly say that most men won’t change. It seems that it just seems to get worse and worse every year as well as the new generations do not understand what chivalry is anymore.

I also believe that these knuckleheads that speak to girls these ways are kinda on the cocky/confident side. If cat calling is something lots of guys do in your area, then you just have to blame the girls who gravitate to that type of behavior. After all, if it works on a few girls, then why not try it on all girls?

I have seen how girls flock to these types of guys which make it hard for a nice guy who actually has respect for girls, to approach them. I tested this out while I was a bit younger. I found that being nice doesn’t always attract the attention of girls. I usually have a habit of holding doors open for people and well…this one time, a girl said “I can do that myself!”. Umm, I said, “sorry, I just saw your hands full”. I still do nice things for people, but I was told that I was looked weak for doing this. When I acted a bit cocky, I saw that girls looked at me different. It was pretty sad and well, I don’t like to be with those types of girls who are attracted to jerks.

I guess overall, people are entitled to give their opinion. We’re all raised differently…so just prepare for the worst and hope for the best out of each person…right? ;) Best of luck to you girls who are having these issues. Maybe one day you should tell a guy off for cat calling? It might just give him some food for thought. ;)

JayApril 11, 2014 at 4:05 pm ∞Reply

Yes you are forever to be friend zoned and whipped.

I don’t understand this but it really depends on the girl. some girls like to be complimented on their breast and butt. some like when you tell them your cleavage looks awesome on that dress. And it doesn’t necessarily has to be an Asian woman, it can be any woman in general. and honestly why bother posting something to advice guy on how to pick up girls?. women should know by now that they will always get hit by guys in any way possible, it is nature if a guy looks at your ass or breast or your entire body in general it doesn’t mean he is a creep. It simple means that he is sexually attracted to you in ever possible way and obviously will try to get in your pants, which is normal.

Now that being said, you can’t discard this man simple by the way he looks at you, give him a chance.. unless he is a completely ugly ball of hair, then I understand, but I had been in many situations in which I like this woman and only one stare accidentally at their ass or breast they dismiss you completely. even though they don’t know your motives yet. So then she goes and tells her friends that I am some kind of creep because I looked at her improper. Excuse me?… what is a proper way of looking a woman then?, guess what… there isn’t. its called sexual attraction there is no love sort of speak, every relationship between a woman and a man will always end up in sex which is procreation, that ensure the survival of our species. but most woman nowadays, have come up with the most stupid arguments against man. don’t get me wrong, not every woman is like that but in my personal experience, it seems that woman is turning into this callous iron shell of creature that judges man improperly.

Again.. no man is a creep ladies, if a man is looking at you so bad that it bothers you, don’t blame him. blame his sexual instinct, sometimes this excitement can’t be stopped, sexual urge is difficult to conceal or relieve. if a man its “creeping” at you it just means his instincts are being triggered by nature.

Interesting topic, I love Asian people in general, they have many of the manners the west has forgotten, but as a western male, i think if you really like the people and you want to meet Asian Women, then you will meet them without having to try to pick them up, they will gravitate to you, if they find you interesting. if they do, be interested in them, and don’t push, and don’t act like you’re the best looking guy in the jungle and maybe the worst Scenario is that you end up with a friend who will make you much happier than you could ever wish

Well i don’t have any of these problems. lol Can i get some advice on how to handle anti-American parents? I really am at a loss for that.

Hi my name is edward,i just read your page i think it would realy help me in the long run,up till now i didnt know what to say to my friend who is all so asain now i understand that it dont matter what race she is as long as i treat her like a human bean and not a peace of meat she might be in to me.thanks again it mean so much to me even if i have no idea of who you are your words were a Bigg help opening my might to all posibilitys.

Lol just read my comment also and mind instead of might lol once again thanx:)

Chin is right on the money here with some simple, sensible, non-confrontational ways of showing an interest in ANYONE regardless of race, sex or any other particular trait. And that’s the point that many seem to miss. Just treat everyone the same – and don’t be overtly forward when introducing yourself, it won’t impress anyone.

Focusing on one particular external characteristic without knowing a person somewhat demonstrates a lack of credibility and imagination. Judging by looks alone will only get you so far. If that’s as far as you want to go, then good luck. If you genuinely are looking to meet new interesting people and maybe even a partner then take her advice and take a little time to really understand why their personality, character, behaviour and ALL aspects of appearance spark your interest. It’ll make conversation all the easier.

It’s worth that little effort.

I found this site off a Google search trying to get pointers on how to pick up Asian women. (I find Asian women unbelievably beautiful.) Why do I need pointers? Because it seems like Asian women don’t dig me. (I’m Hispanic.) I don’t hit on them and I don’t try to pick them up. Rather, all my interactions with them consists of my dealing with an Asian woman working at a Korean cafe or restaurant. I’m friendly, they’re friendly, but I always get the impression I’d strike out if I tried flirting with a Chinese or Japanese woman. Maybe one day I’ll summon up the courage to ask one out on a date.

I don’t understand why the “ni hao ma” line was inappropriate. Since it was another Asian guy perhaps he was Chinese and since you are Asian perhaps he was guessing that you spoke Mandarin. If someone says “How are you” or “Que pasa” they are just trying to start a conversation……

I did like reading your page, although at the end day, you should have said that guys who want to date asian women, should just be themselves as in dating any other woman, not to try to be something they are not.

I have been in two relationships with asian women one born Malaysia, educated in England the other born in the US, educated again educated England, both of them employed in English Healthcare.

I was just myself when I met these two women, I didn’t try to relate to their asian backgrounds, as western guy I would be out my depth if I tried, thats for learning later in the relationship.

What attracted me to them, mainly it was their smiles, the first wasn’t a so call online thing, it was a face to face, we worked in same place, we joke around for a while then it just happen.

The second was online thing, again facial attraction more than anything, we were just being ourselves, I’m not most attractive guy in the world, but its what you say that counts and that relates to any woman at the end day.

Although I did fall for both these women, behind their sweet smiles, they are very driven women, who can be very straight to the point and not to mention controlling of their men. So beware guys!

How about this angle. You say racism is always inappropriate? How about the fact that u didn’t include black males. I am a guy who REALLY doesn’t care what colour the girl I date is so I believe I have the moral authority to speak on this. You know this to be true. A lot of Asian women hold HUUUUGE racist attitudes and are unbelievable scornful of black men. They often feel by trash talking black guys with there Asian friends and white friends that they elevate their social status some how. It makes them feel very western and very white. Now Asian women that like guys are JUST INTO BLACK GUYS AND BLACK CULTURE. I DARE YOU TAKE A POLE OF 100 Asian women and watch their reaction it will either be EEWWWAH! Or U’ll see the minorety that real dig black men. Look into ur heart and examine urself. U may not like what u’ll find . Not saying ur racist but IM JUST SAYIN!

TedApril 13, 2015 at 9:55 am ∞Reply

*I meant Asian women that like black men JUST LIKE BLACK MEN AND ARE INTO BLACK CULTURE ( which is not homogeneous btw )

You prove my point to the letter my friend. One of the ugliest aspects of racism is exclusion. Could u not intelligently respond to my points? I said these things because I was informed of this from YES my Asian girlfriends in the past. They have sat in some of these hateful, scornful and stereotypical discussions about black males.

Thank you for sharing your perspective, and you make some good points, but TBH your “treat me like any other American” stance has a some sticking points that you need to be careful on, and I would love to hear your opinion on them. First, barring that he’s made any crossing-the-line type statements, if a guy actually has GENUINE interest in the language or culture stemming from your ethnicity, then why is it a problem? As long as it’s NOT the ONLY piece of your individuality he appreciates, it shouldn’t be; diversity is a beautiful thing in this world. But just as racism doesn’t have any place, nor does unjustifiably assuming things. All in all, in the name of fairness, just bringing it up that you’re Asian shouldn’t be an immediate deterrent. Next, I think we can all agree that simply asking where you’re from is fine. I ask that question to just about everyone I meet. It’s the asking where you’re REALLY from that, understandably so, annoys. But how about asking if you can speak another language? Irritating as it may be to you or other Asians with the same mentality, that’s a perfectly reasonable question too. And if you do speak Chinese or Korean, there shouldn’t be any reason not to express it. My point is that even though your mindset is such that revealing your ethnicity has no place or relevance in flirting, please don’t let past experiences or emotions get the best of you. You should never HAVE to shy away from who you are. It wouldn’t correlate with being proud that your Asian. Lastly, and to sum up, what you said is true, “We all just unique human beings trying to find some love in this world.” But sometimes WE can’t choose what’ll stimulate our interest or attraction, and that may very well include you being Asian. In maintaining your perspective/stance, you have to realize that there is definitely a line, and until your suitor crosses it, you gotta be fair to. It’s the only way you can expect to be treated fairly.

This post is a few years old now and I’m not sure of the likelihood of you reading this, but I just wanted to say a few things in response, hopefully not to be taken as mean hearted.

I could not speak of the nature of the original intention of this post, that would be foolish to attempt to know that. However, it seems that the purpose is less to give advice and more to scold men. I would like to point out that if women had the need to flirt; the use of fumbling, idiotic and cringe worthy tactics for pick up would absolutely be used. The fact is the vast majority of women simply need to accept a free drink and giggle. As a rule of thumb many women hate excessively being hit on. I get it. But some facts of life need to be accepted, and the sooner the better. And how would someone know that a woman has been getting hit on a lot? Should guys ascertain by the level of beauty that a woman has hit the proverbial ceiling limit? It is a bit bothersome that you never explicitly outlined as to why your ex was “missing the point” when he stated basically that shitty people are shitty people? As a matter of fact; that is the single most undying, relentless, unwavering, most true and steadfast notion there could ever be while living a human life. There will be a day when all of that wanted or unwanted attention will be turned off in your life forever. Again, it’s just life.

Life or the planet as a whole is not made a better place by opinion blogs (nor are responses to them, I understand that). The course of evolution will not take a quantum leap through awareness. It simply does not work that way. [Actually, I don’t fully believe that. If every human on a planet all had the same beautiful balanced image of peace in their minds eye at exactly the same moment, brain power connectivity might actually do something globally transcendent and unbelievably wonderful.]

If someone went up to an attractive black woman and asked her if she would like to go to KFC with them, that person is what we call “stupid”. Inept. Socially incapable. They are fools in every aspect of life, and they multiply much faster than capable, respectful people. Again, this must be realized soon, or choose to forego a night destination that is 100% guaranteed to have these people.

There are worse things in life than being hit on, even if it is A LOT. Being pretty is a tough life isn’t it? If I were asked if it hurt when I fell from ivory heaven (said in some kind of a way that was clearly meant to be harmless) every 8 minutes, every day of my life, the flattery felt would never truly die. Too bold to say, since there is no way for me to experience it until I am reborn as a curvy 10? Well, I am an adult and I know when to not shit on people’s good intentions, no matter how ill progressed that person’s frontal lobe is. Seems ironic after reading this novella though right?

I’m glad that some people got some good stuff out of your post, honestly. Hopefully that will continue. I wrote what I felt, even if the sentiments aren’t shared are even read.

Oh, and I know that you don’t like anonymous keyboard warriors so I will sign in with my FB account. Feel free to drop by.

Pretty cool notes. And we get front row seats to some of the examples . Haha. I’m terrible with with women, maybe because I lack confidence , but I guess I make up for it in courage . It’s pretty obvious why I am on this page. So thanks for being in the right place at the right time. That’s why I love asian girl . They are always on time. Lol. So many references can be made from that. Lol jk.

Stumbled across this article while searching information on a recent attack on a girl on a Sydney train, intrigued I read the article, was shocked and thought you were overgeneralizing people’s stupidity – then I read the comments. Guys trying to pick up in the comments section of an article describing their goofiness.

Ah, this life. So beautiful.

Hahaha another dumb bitch trying to get a date using a blog and its sad this bitch is a retarded white bitch in a Asian body haha when will these desperate hoes learn well all bitches are the same y’all hoes need to be put in a big ass cage and sent to a unknown island p.s u make us Asians look bad

i know you said not to say it…. but really you are beautiful

11:21pm I should be sleeping but this blog is retardedly funny. Few comments.

A) Internet has made us all dumber. B) Guys will always be weird perverted human beings. It’s in our genetic code. I’m one of them! C) Who ever writes in this blog has most likely an interest in Asian women. Thus this is a biased population sample and no statistican interpretation and is valid and no generalization can be made. D) B + C means that some guys like tall, some guys like short, black, white,big boob, small boob, skinny, curvy, asian, mixed, native american (I’ve never heard anyone talking about Eskimo girls btw, so sad face for them I guess) etc. For example, I most likely have some brain cell programming that makes me like short skinny asian girls, because in my eyes they look attractive and young, so who cares, whatever. E) who ever hates her(the author) point of view, you still contribute to her blog by increasing her traffic and valuation so the joke is on you/us.

Bottom line, here is my humble opinion. I don’t believe any guy who says that they like Asian women because they “behave” and “treat them nice”. Go marry an ugly/fat/old redneck woman. She will treat you like a prince. (I have nothing against ugly/fat/old redneck women so don’t jump on me because first of all you admit you are ugly/fat/old and second of all I’m ugly fat old for some girls out there). We are superficial. We need to satisfy our vision after all and go with something that is visually appealing.

PS saying we are proud to be Asian / American / Italian / white / black / smurf / is kinda silly. We didn’t do anything for it, we were just born that way. We should be proud for things we achieve and put some effort into.

After writting all this I am sure I’ve contributed nothing to this world ha ha.

BradenJuly 26, 2015 at 6:05 am ∞Reply

Haha I agree. extremely late on the original post. I found this topic because I seen a pretty girl I tried to talk to. Her primary language was madrain she only spoke to me in English, but I was having a hard time understanding her accent was looking for help about it. But every comment section is exatly the same on this topic for any post even though the posts differ slightly. They have good information about culture. Yes American is a culture and it differs by area to. I like your thoughts on this topic. I laughed when I read the part about people thinking you where dressing as an anime. My first thought was street fighter to be honest. Nothing to do with race but gave me a smile after thinking about it. Figured I’d put my 2 cents on on this topic.

What if there is someone in the world that really just wants to be in love with someone?

I am looking for a nice beautiful asian girl what talent with personality is so humor and outgoing nice go out to have fun but get to know that person and she did to me to get to know me I am a man looking for a beautiful asian girl is very kind very sweet and talented I like to go out diner clubbing walking movies walking sure everything else to possibly leave if I give me the girl feel good and comfortable make her understand me me understand her see how life goes by beautiful asian girls are beautiful they are create in mind of everything that’s the type of person I am looking for please get back to me and let me know what you think my name is full dangelo I’m from Philly Pennsylvania I am 15 years old of age 55 on 35 pounds medium built or working man in my life for last 32 years and I’m looking for somebody right now in awhile for me for the one with someone but if it’s you I hope I catch a ride with you to see how things go I hope you get back to me it seemed like going to picture of this photo is seem like you are very beautiful girl I like to me thank you

I usually find that starting a pleasant conversation with a woman of any race will open the door for you and if she’s into you shell give you signs that she is and if not well you just talked to a beautiful woman so good for you

Hello. This blog may be dead but I thought I’s a comment anyway as I have a perspective different from other posters.

I’m a Caucasian American expatriate who has worked in Greater China (HK and Taiwan) for over 10 years. My spoken and written Chinese is highly proficient.

I’ve travelled extensively all over the world. Meeting women of any ethnicity has always been easy for me. Simply be confident and make the other person smile and hopefully laugh (with you, not at you). Be aggressive without being creepy. Be a good and active listener. Be positive and upbeat. Be polite and move on if she’s not interested. It’s very easy and no special skills are required to meet a Chinese / Japanese/ Korean/ etc. woman as opposed to a Lithuanian / Panamanian etc. woman. I’ve dated them all.

I agree with most of the author’s advice. For example, it’s thuggish and abusive for a guy to approach an Asian woman and say “I like Asian chicks because they are tight.” I’d probably drop any guy who said that to an Asian female friend of mine. But a blog shouldn’t be necessary to explain that. I think the author is right that avoiding remarks about ethnicity INITIALLY is the right move, but after you’ve spoken for awhile it should be fine.

I think the author is overally sensitive, however, about certain things. I’m in a tiny minority of Caucasians living in Taipei, and people here–men and women–frequently ask me about my nationality, ethnicity and family heritage shortly after meeting me. I’m not offended, although I’m disappointed in women who tell me they will ONLY date white guys, or are most interested in Americans, etc. This is extremely superficial and not a mark of intelligence.

I really don’t understand the author’s hang-up about being asked her cultural heritage. Asians in Asia do it to Caucasians ALL THE TIME. It’s an icebreaker. In my experience, Chinese / Taiwanese who get pissed about being asked if they are Korean have racist feelings toward Koreans.

I also think the author’s anger at the Asian guy (probably ethnic Chinese) who said “Ni hao” to her is hard to understand. When I happen to stumble on another Caucasian foreigner in Taipei, I’ll usually smile and say “hello”. I’d be shocked if any Caucasian (or Taiwanese, for that matter) would be angered because I didn’t say 你好 in Chinese. I can say with certainty that the Chinese and Taiwanese guys I know would consider the author very rude if she expressed anger at them for daring to speak in Chinese, since she herself is ethnic Chinese.

MarkDecember 4, 2015 at 5:04 am ∞Reply

I agree with you completely. I’m a mixed origin westerner who spent most his adult life in Taiwan and the PRC, but I did live in SF Chinatown for a year. Most people there were Cantonese speakers with maybe 1/3 also speaking Mandarin and much fewer speaking English.

My first time in the laundromat on Waverly st., I saw all the clothes washing powder machines were out of order. So I asked a 20 something woman there “唔該, 洗衣粉賣在哪裡？” and she totally lost her shit at me for speaking Chinese. About 10 seconds into that, a woman who looked about 70 walked over from another washing machine and told me the machine was always broken and pointed down the street telling me where I could buy some. I thanked her and started to leave to buy some detergent and the younger woman looked dumbstruck and said something like “oh, you want detergent…”

She could actually understand Chinese, but thought I was flirting with her and just went into attack mode without even thinking! Even when I got back with the detergent and was loading my clothes into the machine, she still asked why I spoke Chinese and I actually had to pull out my TW ID card before she let it drop. Honestly, I think she was the one with racial prejudices and she’d never have done that if I’d been 華僑.

Fortunately, I didn’t meet that kind of aggressive person often, but it did happen more than once in SF. In Asia, people often make all kinds of racial assumptions about me (like being stupid or unable to use chopsticks or lazy) but at least they aren’t openly hostile at me for just trying to communicate with them in my best guess of what our common language is. Even a hyper nationalist Beijinger is better that IMHO.

lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

Race is non-existent. There is only one “race:” and it’s called the human race.

There may be different tribes. Or customs. Or skin color differences. But there is no such thing as racism.

Just tribalism.

And – ALL women get hit on. Asian women sometimes forget this. And guys are dumb.

So there ya go.

wow, you seem a stuck up asian girl, and you aint that hot anyways, aussie asian girls dont have a inferiority complex like you do,,, get over it……..I think youre exaggerating about how many guys actually hit on you

So here are my general guidelines for straight single men trying to talk to ANY WOMAN you’re physically and or psychologically drawn to:

Compliment her on her looks or outfit but be specific without being creepy. The words “You’re so hot/gorgeous/beautiful” are so overused and trite, but you might be the first guy to tell her “I really like your modern haircut” or “Your necklace is really cool” this month. Just don’t cross the line over to sexual like “Your ass/cleavage looks amazing in that dress.” Smile and say something along the line of “Hey, how’s it going? My name is _______.” Observe her behavior for a while and try to find something relevant to say or ask or joke about. For example, if she’s watching a sports game, ask for her predictions of how it will turn out. If she’s waiting to order a drink at your neighborhood bar, ask her if she has had your favorite drink there yet. Joking around is always good provided that she shares your sense of humor.

^Call bullshit on this LOL. Also, I agree with others, your shit only works with gay looking white guys. I’m sorry, but I’ve tried all these on over 50 Asian women online. And they start to lose interest after 10 minutes in a convo. Clearly mental cases around lol.

Also, the problem is not with men. The problem is with you Asian women being overly sensitive and way too fucking picky. Why are men easy to talk to and not easily offended? Why do we have to follow guidelines to talk to women? This is dumb.

Hi Chin. I’m not going to hit on you, so you can let out a little “Phew!” right about now. I fell in love recently in Tay Ninh, with the sweetest, most decent, funniest, sharpest-minded girl in the world. I plan to spend the rest of my life with her, and she with me; right now we’ll live in Vietnam, but neither of us knows the future, other than that ours must be together.

I spent 4 months of 2015 in Barcelona, Spain. I hit on dozens of girls there, most of them Oriental (I’m British, btw, so “Asian” has a different meaning to us: most Russians are Asian, as are most Turks, all Pakistanis and over a billion other folks whom the average American would be confused to hear me allude to as “Asian”). I had an on-off-on again-off again gf in Bcn who was Chinese. I dated and got toyed with or rejected by plenty of Koreans (they tend not to use compass points in their nationalities, though, for sure, none of them was a northerner), Chinese girls Singaporeans and, inevitably Spaniards and South Americans.

Here’s the thing, Chin. Not once did I ever ask where any new person I met was from, much less where they were “really” from. And I always used to playfully respond to that meaningless, dull question with: “I never divulge that kind of information on a first date. So, anyway, what is your earliest childhood memory?”. Either that or, as you sagely advise here, I would ask them to tell me more about X sport that I knew they were into, or their experienced backpacking in Y city which they’d told me they had just visited prior to Bcn, and so forth.

I’m amazed, disgusted and disappointed in equal measure at how ubiquitous the casual racism you talk about seems to be; and I’m astounded that any guy expects to endear himself to the focus of his desire by “noticing” and remarking on such alienating banalities. But I did notice skillless “charmers” getting lucky regardless, all the time. And it was (forgive the racist stereotype, please, Chin!), usually a lanky, golden-haired Australian with a surfboard under his arm who would take home, on any given evening, the pretty girl whom I’d invested an hour or more of my evening in making giggle and making feel good about her lovely, very uniquely wonderful self.

So, laudible and worthwhile as your observations and inducations are, there’s a certain kind of man, and a certain kind of woman, who are so impenetrably superficial that, well, stupid “egg-fried rice” quips and such like will always be ok for them.

I know this sounds disappointing. But your experience, too, must surely confirm the reality in what I’m telling you, right?

All Asian women are beautiful, and no, i’m not here to pick anyone up… i just wish i lived in Japan, I like love their culture, plus i love hearing about their history because American history is so boring and depressing… my dream girl is Asian and im holding out for her.. im gonna start saving up for Rosetta Stone, just to make that 1st effort toward finding her

This is one ugly girl.

Woah this was really interesting to read! I’m a blonde Caucasian female and I get hit on a lot too but not in a way that’s racist! I agree I think its a huge double standard. I guess I can’t speak for all Caucasian girls but for me, I’ve never really had a lot of people ask me questions about race. I think the furthest its ever come was “Are you into black guys?” which is a question I’ve only gotten twice from a white guy and the other time was a white/Asian guy. Wow I also just wanna say you’re super pretty! I’m not half as pretty as you but I understand your pain of creepy guys coming onto you 24/7. But damn! I still cant believe guys constantly bring your race into it that’s just stupid. Especially the “you know my ex was Asian” line… that’s gotta be one of the worst ive ever heard.

Hi! I’m a Chinese girl who moved from China and I don’t get offended at any of the things you mentioned. People think we are more traditional because most Chinese are and it IS part of our culture. And asking someone where they are from is not offensive to me. I love to know where people’s from and get to know more about them. Even if you are from SF, know what ethnicity you are helps start conversations and getting to know your background! I know I’m interested in where people’s from or where ur family is from. I usually ask about ur background from another country because I find another culture interesting. Hell, my ex boyfriend was blonde and his grandpa was nazis. But of course, I’m missing the point. The point is, to me at least, you might be sensitive on a lot of issues. I think most people are not intentional racists. They just more into certain type of girl.

First of all, THANK YOU! Secondly, yeah I know this is an old post but whatever…

I can relate. I’m not Asian. I’m not female…but I can relate. I am hispanic, mexican, chicano, latino…pick your favorite one…that’s me (just please don’t label me Spanish!!!). I refer to myself as an American of Mexican heritage, I was born in Cali, my parent (yes that’s singular) she was also born in Cali, but whatever.

I work in a corporate environment for a big global tech company and I’ve experienced countless comments, questions from “well-meaning” peers, biz partners, etc.. It’s unfortunate that race gets shoved into just about every social aspect of our lives. I’ve lost count of how many times people have asked me about how to cook some Mexican dish…it’s like “…dude, I don’t even know, like…my grandma didn’t even make that!”.

So back to my sincere thanks to you – I mean it. I too am guilty of being attracted to Asian girls. And I too have fumbled about trying to smooth talk my way into their hearts, and it can be hard to find something to break the ice with. Sometimes my stupid pick up lines work, other times not so much but my point is that I appreciate the time you took to make a point about using race. I never really thought that I would ever make someone feel the way my peers at work have sometimes made me feel, especially towards someone that I am trying to get “romantical” with.

Oh and for the record, I don’t like Asians because of some weirdo 18th century idea that all Asian women are conservative, THEY ARE NOT! Or that they are all extra “tight” (lol ewww) they are all not that either. For me it’s mostly because I grew up in a diverse population and had mostly Asian or hispanic friends and so if I see an Asian girl coming my way then I’ll inevitably turn into George McFly – not smooth.

-Edgar

As a white American male whom is attracted by the Asian female I didn’t get much from this… All I can say I got from this is don’t use racial stereotypes when hitting on Asian females which, to me anyways, is common sense when hitting on any race of females, lol. But I guess from your previous encounters the guys hitting on you didn’t have much common sense… Then again common sense isn’t that common anymore this day and age!!!

This article is complete bullshit. First Asian women predominately like white & Asian man.. very rare you see them with black & hispanic. They’re just as racist because they tend to date lightskin males culturally, only thing that makes them different from whites iare they don’t have the Sepremacist title in their history. And Asiam women overall are just weird, unappealing women, men only find them exotic because they look so different from anyone else…but if you take out the face they just crazy, shallow, dumb bitches.

Wow you are so into yourself!! Lame girl.

I really enjoyed the tips u have provided and can only hope to muster up the strength to one day be able to express how I would really love to kiss her cute eyes n run my fingers thru your silky smooth hair to wake every morning to say Wo Ani to you and only you as a Hispanic 1/2 Puerto Rican 1/2 Dominican Republic, born in Brooklyn New York raised in Miami Florida it’s so challenging to me to be fortunate enough to be able to truly find my Asian queen wish I knew where to find you now that I have return to my native state of New York.

I like Asian girls because of the shape of their eyes and usually their high cheekbone. I mean I like Asian girls because I think they’re more beautiful. Am I pervert or sick? For the rest I think they’re just like every other girl, no fried rice nor whatever. Actually during the period I’ve been living in Japan, it has been pretty frustrating for me being treated like an object only because I was Italian. I treat people as people without caring about the ethnicity, but I like Asian girls more. Do I deserve a medical treatment?

I like Asian girls because of the shape of their eyes and usually their high cheekbone. I mean I like Asian girls because I think they’re more beautiful. Am I pervert or sick? For the rest I think they’re just like every other girl, no fried rice nor whatever. Actually during the period I’ve been living in Japan, it has been pretty frustrating for me being treated like an object only because I was Italian. I treat people as people without caring about the ethnicity, but I like Asian girls more. Do I deserve a medical treatment??

So then in the end you cant open with anything related to race such as being Asian. But if your goal is date an Asian woman simply because you find them beautiful then you cant say that either? If all that leaves you is to say “nice day today, huh?” wouldn’t that come off as boring? What if there is a natural curiousity there and I said “”I caught that Joy Luck Club and I just wondering if you can relate to any of it?” Would this be an offensive opening? Great post, funny.

I know many Asian women they tell me the same thing how white,black and Latino men make there comments thinking how easy they’re to pick up. Iam a Hispanic man who has dated Asian woman all I can say is be your self don’t try to hard to impress them show respect and take your time talk about family talk about there day show up with flower become there friend and be patient don’t kiss on the first date meet her family and you can’t do this then then you will never meet a nice girl This not just for Asian woman it’s for all women

Wow. All this time, I was doing it wrong. My line was: “Yo Hogigamashinto, wanna go boom boom on some eggroll? I like the yellow hot mustard baby!” Now I umderstand why all those Korean, Japanese, and Chinese girls said “no speaka English!” I thought it was just because I was at the airport terminal waiting near JAL, Korean Air and Air China. Hmm…

Seriously, are you serious with this Chin? What crazy guys are you attracting? Sorry you experienced such idiots, but your advice smack of an unsaid underlying assumption that non-Asian men would have such racist thinking, and that assumption is itself racist, especially by comparing other non-Asian men to the one that flaunted he had an ex-girlfriend that was Asian.

For the record, I’m white and grew up in a diverse neighborhood. I can tell you, you speaking for “Asian women” plays into the stupid American simplification of Asians as all one homogenous group. They most certainly are not. Its like referring to “Euorpean women,” thinking what appeals or would generally apply culturally to an English woman would apply to a Serb would apply to a Swede would apply to a French woman. I assure there is no magic underlying formulaic approach.

Lastly, having dated a Korean and Chinese-American girl in highschool and college, I know Asian can be nasty racists asses, especially the family members of the girl being dated and well treated. No race had a monopoly on racism or ignorance. A woman being of any given race is not an issue. What is is her nature and compatibility. And I’ve lived long enough now to know the only univerisal commonality uniting people is ignorance and prejudices and a want to be respected and loved.

I’m late to the party but I found this site while trying to find statistics on black/asian interracial relationships in San Francisco.

Why?

Because I noticed that similar to my hometown Seattle, San Francisco has a huge population of asian people and a low-ish percentage of black people but it seems to me that asian/black relationships were much more popular back home and are practically non-existent here in the bay area, save a few asian guys I’ve met with black girlfriends.

Anyway, being a black male I totally understand where you’re coming from on this topic. People assume I’m aggressive all the time, assume that I must be pissed off since im not as extroverted as they expected, and my personal favorite, turn on their playa playa swag to talk to me only to realize I talk “like a white guy.” Wamp wamp wamp.

I’m giving you these examples to illustrate a couple of things… 1) That it’s not just asian girls or people who are sometimes treated as some type of exotic fetish, everyone experiences it to some degree (more so if you are not white), and 2) It’s common. Some people are curious, some people are stupid, and sometimes people are both. Bad combination. Consider yourself enlightened and use it live an enriched life. Most naturally with those who have similar life experiences.

I’m single. :)

Dudes, the lady has left the room. Your words are just blowing in the wind

Lalalalala.. all creatures are equal in God’s eyes and very beautiful…

I don’t know how I got this site of yours, but it’s hysterically funny. I know exactly what you’re talking about, I am an Asian male with two sisters. I have seen it all my life. I have been with white women and Asian women. Text me for any insight. 808 283 0877

I don’t know how I got this site of yours, but it’s hysterically funny. I know exactly what you’re talking about, I am an Asian male with two sisters. I have seen it all my life. I have been with white women and Asian women. Text me for any insight. 808 283 0877 I know my name sounds super German. But I am hapa. Mom born and raised in Japan. Text if you feel like it. You caught my attention.

beautiful girl, I’m very attracted to your asian amazing lips (hope I wasn’t racist there hahah) and I like your attitude also :D I can see, a conversation or something more than that with you can be interesting.

what can I say.. come to Europe! I don’t know how it is San Francisco but for sure you’ll be amazed by east countries of Europe., here you can see a lot of beautiful landscapes and another things, nice experience.. and who knows, maybe I’ll be your guide in this journey if you let me to bite your lips ;)

see you

Aloha,

I believe your a victem of your own words. Me personally I love cultures, I have often approached Asian Wahine and during the initial conversation ask what there nationality is rather then where they are from so I can find something in common with my experiences. Myself born and raised in Hawaii and being a minority I grew to love the cultures of the many different people living there. In fact I speak many languages and eat, cook and live by different beliefs, spirituality and I practice hula and many different martial arts but I’m not from an Asian or the kanaka maoli race. Does that mean I hate my own race or nationality? No. I am American and hapa and i love diversity. The problem today is it’s not ok to be unique. Political correctness demands we all be the same. It’s ok young lady to be described as kanani or nani for having features relatted to your nationality or race. This is a compliment. But I also understand where you conning from too. It really depends on the spirit of intent of the person approaching you. Often I find it’s just lack of knowledge or ignorence rather then being disrespectful. For example, do you know how many stupid questions I and others from Hawai’i that move to the mainland get from people who know nothing about the islands? Try does everyone surf? Do you guys live in huts(seriously)? Do you speak Hawaiian(I do a little but not everyone does) I think you get the point. But I found most are just curious and they ask out of curiosity not to be disrespectful. It’s hard to believe that just 10 years ago there were places in our country that have never been exposed to anything other then Apple pie culture or the Caucasian race. A lot of people approaching Asian American girls may just be in awe to expierence something different. Not everything is negative. Myself growing up on Hawai’i i took for grantted the beauty of Asian woman because they are everywhere on the islands. But living the last decade in areas on the mainland that are just Caucasian I have come to appreciate Asian woman again and every woman of different races as being uniquely beautiful. In conclusion, political correctness is also racist became it doesn’t recognize or respect the uniqueness of each culture or its right to exist but wants to create a one universal culture. We see this in the gentraficatiin of anything unique in this country and the islands. Mahalo for your time.

[newstwitter-blog]

New Post has been published on News Twitter

New Post has been published on http://www.news-twitter.com/2017/02/09/la-times-jack-nicholson-as-toni-erdmann-when-right-minded-ideas-come-out-wrong-18/

La Times: Jack Nicholson as ‘Toni Erdmann’: When right-minded ideas come out wrong

Maybe it was just coincidence that I was sitting in intermission of Glenn Close‘s revived “Sunset Boulevard” when this news of the Jack Nicholson “Toni Erdmann” remake came through. It sure felt like fate though.

There I was Tuesday night, watching Close as Norma Desmond. There are good reasons to stage theater revivals and bad reasons to stage theater revivals (and, these days on Broadway, really bad, cynical, money-grubbing reasons to stage theater revivals). I won’t offer a thought on what animates the new Andrew Lloyd Webber production; you could make various cases. But Close — who also played the part in the earlier Broadway production —  is indisputably a good reason to see it.

Of course, the actress didn’t have the original role: Patti LuPone did. LuPone was the one ready for her close-up when the show opened in London in 1993. And she was set to reprise the part on Broadway — so set that when she didn’t get it, she successfully sued Lloyd Webber. None of that mattered to audiences who saw Close tackle the part on Broadway. Nor will it matter to those seeing it now. This is Glenn Close’s role. Whatever LuPone did on the West End, Close does it just as well; in fact, she does it better. You can’t imagine anyone else doing Desmond. Nor, with apologies to Broadway’s original Eva Peron, should you.

Which brings me to Nicholson. It is great — unquestionably beautiful and great — that Nicholson is returning to the screen. He hasn’t been there in seven years (James L. Brooks’ “How Do You Know?”) and, if we’re being honest, really hasn’t been there in a decade (Rob Reiner’s “The Bucket List”). At 79, he’s been in a kind of unofficial state of retirement.

But is it great he’s doing it this way?

“Toni Erdmann,” in case you’re not down with the foreign scene, is the German-language, largely Romania-shot movie that tackles big issues like globalism and feminism in the context of one of the most complex, human and funny parent-offspring relationships in recent film memory. Nominated for the foreign-language Oscar (and in theaters currently), it explores the dynamic of a goofy-but-vulnerable older dad, Winfried, who adopts the titular alter ego as a way of connecting with his progeny, his uptight and barely indulgent corporate daughter, Ines. The movie manages to make these people come alive — it manages to make our own relationships come alive, if that doesn’t sound too hyperbolic.

A great sophomore director, Maren Ade, made it, and she assembled both a terrific cast of people with great theater backgrounds — the Austrian stage great Peter Simonischek plays Winfried and East German-born star Sandra Hüller is Ines. (Here’s more on what’s in “Toni Erdmann,” and the incredibly handmade process that went into creating it.)  I think it’s the best movie of the year. I’m far from alone.

Nicholson apparently loved the movie too. Per the Variety story that broke the news, he adored it — so much so that he persuaded Paramount to buy  the English-language remake rights as a starring vehicle for him, with the project attracting Adam McKay to produce and Kristen Wiig to star as the Ines character.

The idea of liking “Toni Erdmann” is good. The idea of more people becoming familiar with “Toni Erdmann” is good. But this remake is a bad idea‎.

It’s not that remakes of foreign-language film can’t work, though I can’t think of many recent ones that did. (Scorsese’s “The Departed” is one of the few that comes to mind.) It’s that this particular foreign-language remake can’t work.

Right off the bat, the setting is a problem. The sub-surface tension of “Toni” concerns Western Europeans working in Eastern Europe (Ines is involved a Romanian deal for her multinational); it’s a plot line that illuminates so much about modern European capitalism; when Ines comments on a giant mall built for no one, it hits home with anyone who’s ever witnessed the false promise of globalism across the Continent.  Sure, you can imagine Nicholson’s version as some American bigwig in a hardscrabble foreign place too. But it loses that specificity.

The tone is a bigger problem. There’s a kind of absurdist, at times even gleefully nihilist, spirit to “Toni Erdmann.” And it’s not just Winfried — Ines at one point throws a “naked party,” and at another sings karaoke Whitney Houston, in two of the wildest scenes you’ll see on screen this year. And let’s face it: Absurdism and gleeful nihilism are modes that Americans just don’t do particularly well. (We do a lot of modes well. Those just aren’t among them.)

Maybe the biggest problem, though, is the people making this movie. Which director can ably take on such a mix of tones; who can find slapstick comedy and poignant humanism in the same film, sometimes even in the same scene? Jim Brooks in his heyday, maybe. Lawrence Kasdan, possibly. But who actively working today? David O. Russell is the closest name I can come up with. And I’m not even sure about him. (Another remote possibility, someone with an outside shot of pulling it off, is McKay himself. Perhaps knowing the foolishness of the errand, he’s keeping a producerial arm’s length, at least for the moment.)

And then you get to Nicholson.  Part of the joy of the “Toni” character is that even though he’s a fundamentally silly figure, he’s also at heart a rather sad one. This is a man who puts on false teeth and pretends to be a life coach while simultaneously mourning the loss of his dog. Ade called what Simonischek was doing as Toni was “making it so that you can see past the jokes into his soul.” And I’m just not convinced you get that with Nicholson. I think what you’d get if you looked past the jokes with Nicholson was more Nicholson. (And yep, that takes into account “About Schmidt,” maybe the closest thing to this role he’s done.)

It would be unfair to beat up on the resident of ol’ Bad Boy Drive though. It’s not his fault. We just don’t have actors who can do that antic-but-heartfelt thing. Run down mentally the American actors of that generation who might fit the bill. Steve Martin? Too glib. Bill Murray? Too dark. John Malkovich? Too emotionally inaccessible. Some British actors come to mind — particularly those with Monty Python-esque backgrounds. Even they seem like stretches. The American actor who actually most comes to mind is sadly someone no longer around: Robin Williams.

The truth is “Toni Erdmann” shouldn’t be remade not because it’s too sacred, or because remakes are inherently bad, or because any of a dozen cliches you read in curmudgeonly posts when these things like this are announced. It’s because to do it as an American “Toni Erdmann” is to erode much of what made the movie so special in the first place.

Basically, this isn’t a Glenn Close situation. In fact, it’s the opposite of a Glenn Close situation. You can’t imagine someone else taking on the part and running with it because you can’t see a single flaw in the original performance, and you can’t see a single conceivable improvement made by someone else.

But there is good news. The announcement of the “Toni Erdmann” remake comes at a propitious time. Final Oscar voting begins Monday. And “Erdmann” — which was criminally shut out of a prize at Cannes, not to mention Ade ignored entirely for best director — could use a boost. Voters, many of whom no doubt haven’t seen the film, will be sitting down to fill out their ballots. They may not know Toni Erdmann from Tony Dorsett. But they know Nicholson liked it. And that may be enough to get them to vote for it and spur it to Oscar victory. Sometimes it can be good to be ready for your close-up.

See the most-read stories in Entertainment this hour »

[email protected]

Twitter: @ZeitchikLAT

ALSO

The long, strange odyssey of bringing Oscar fave ‘Toni Erdmann’ to the screen

Review: Comedy and heartache make perfect bedfellows in the magnificent German comedy ‘Toni Erdmann’

‘Toni Erdmann’ is in a sense autobiographical, except for that naked party

This post has been harvested from the source link, and News-Twitter has no responsibility on its content. Source link