thedevilsattendant - Tumblr blog

thedevilsattendant · 9 days

Text

I forgot how absolutely ABSURD the anti-lucifer league is.

Lesson 17-20, Satan and Belphie create the Formerly Anti-Lucifer League and drag MC along to do their first prank. They need to break into his locked/warded study in the library, and are trying to guess the password Lucifer would speak aloud to gain entry.

.... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your spoken fanfiction, boys, please. Don't mind me. ????? 😂😂😂

Like okay, the Diavolo is everything, I would die for you Diavolo, fine, we're trolling. I get it. He's a little too fond of his prince.

But the I love you so much it hurts? The there's nothing I wouldn't let you do to me?? The in fact there's so much I wish you WOULD do to me??? I think I've read those smutty fanfics, did they read the same ones or were they ghost-writing those?

Anti-Lucifer League meets up once a week to read their DiaLuci fanfic to the group. Mephisto is part of the fanfic shipper club. They sit around a laptop furiously typing up their 73 chapter slowburn romance novel of Diavolo and Lucifer, where Lucifer is a desperately daydreaming sub longing for his prince and not realizing the affections are already returned.

They end each club meeting by reassuring each other this is definitely trolling Lucifer and they all definitely hate him and this whole thing is just because they don't like him at all and that's why they're doing this and for no other reason.

(Diavolo has Barbatos steal him a copy of their work in progress and he reads it as a bedtime story. He wanted to give them notes but Barbatos pointed out that would alert them to his theft of their secret project and would likely halt its completion and also humiliate those involved.)

#barb reading this as a *bedtime story*#im absolutely cackling #i love this #obey me! shall we date?#obey me!#obey me! lucifer #obey me! diavolo #om! lucifer #om! diavolo #om! shall we date #dialuci

534 notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 12 days

Text

What I think the Obey me! characters favorite sports would be!

Lucifer: Golf.

Mammon: I kinda see him as a soccer guy, but I also could see him enjoying gymnastics.

Leviathan: Esports obviously. And swimming.

Satan: Lacrosse so he can beat his enemies with a stick

Asmodeus: Dance and Tennis/Badminton

Beelzebub: Football, rugby, basketball

Belphegor: Also golf because it’s simple.

Diavolo: I think he would like Track and field because there are so many options.

Barbatos: Synchronized swimming and Archery

Luke: Badminton

Simeon: Fencing and Archery

Solomon: Ping pong

Thirteen: Hockey or lacrosse

Mephistopheles: What’s that one sport where they ride horses and hit balls….? Polo. He would love polo

Rafael: Javelin

#imagining lucifer in golf trousers has me *cackling*#obey me!#obey me! shall we date?

85 notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 12 days

Text

“Hey, Lucifer,” you chimed.

The demon came to a stop mid-stride and turned around to look at you suspiciously, providing ample time for you to catch up. He decided to give you the benefit of the doubt, despite knowing his brothers use that same tone when they’re about to pester him with nonsense. “What?”

You tilted your head, “would you still love me if I was a worm?”

Lucifer sighed and continued on his way. He had no time for frivolous questions. You scrambled after him. Lucifer was a struggle to keep up with when he wasn’t matching his stride to yours.

“Well?” you demanded an answer. Though, your brisk jog didn’t make you look as intimidating as you would have liked.

He rolled his eyes. You couldn’t actually see, yet you knew. You summoned your most dramatic acting skills.

“I could be cursed to turn into a worm someday! I have to be prepared for anything! Pray tell, would you still love me?”

Without looking back, he responded, “you’re human. That’s already hardly different from a worm.”

You stopped to gasp scandalously. Lucifer threw his head back and let out a deep, devilish laugh.

“Demon!” you scowled.

Lucifer paused again to meet your gaze with a taunting smile. His haughty attitude was at max power, and while arching an eyebrow he asked, “well? Am I wrong?”

It was hard to act mad when he was being so handsome, and he knew it.

#omg #“hardly different from a worm”#💀💀💀💀💀#😂😂😂#although i would also be begging that terrible old man to tell me im the best worm 🥺#obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date #obey me! mc #obey me! lucifer

664 notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 22 days

Text

and today, simeon ✨️

#om! shall we date #obey me! shall we date?#obey me!#obey me! nightbringer #om! nightbringer #om! simeon #obey me! simeon #macrame #bracelet

2 notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 23 days

Text

“Don’t,” you warned Lucifer. You saw that self-assured grin on his face. You knew what he was planning.

“What? I just came to see what you were doing.” He leaned on your shoulder with enough weight to tilt you several inches sideways, no matter how much you pushed back. “Don’t mind me, carry on.”

“Don’t you have more important things to do?” you retorted, but it was too late. The others were catching on.

“Hey, hey! What’s going on?” Mammon came over and pushed against your other shoulder, tilting you back upright. “What are two of my favorite people doin’?”

You tried to shrug them both off, to no avail. “We’re not doing anything. We can stop this.”

You couldn’t stop it. Asmodeus was on his way and wasted no time crossing his arms over your back, happily leaning into you from behind. You tilted forward. “Hey! What’s happening here?”

You sighed, “we’re not doing this again.”

Asmodeus teased you with honeyed innocence, “doing what, hon? Something on your mind?”

These three demons thought they were so funny.

A passing Satan made eye contact with you. In that exact moment, you used every bit of imaginary telepathy you could muster. Surely Satan would understand. He could save you. He could free you before it really was too late.

He observed what his brothers were doing, nodded, and approached with a congenial grin. Mission failed.

“Traitor!” You regretted ever agreeing to join this exchange program as Satan slowly fell back into you. You didn’t even try to catch him, you were too busy trying to remain upright under the combined weight of four demons. They were hardly even holding back.

You couldn’t see who was running up, being too busy blowing Satan’s blonde hair out of your face, but at this point it didn’t matter. They were all coming for you.

“Let me in on this!” Leviathan said cheerily.

“Yeah!” “Come on!” Asmodeus and Mammon gladly made some room for Leviathan, which was difficult because you were sinking lower and lower, and you felt another weight pile onto your back as Levi cozied up to your torso. This scenario had played out enough times now that the brothers could somehow keep you from falling over like a Jenga tower, but it was still only a matter of time.

Belphegor squeezed his way in between Satan and Lucifer and wordlessly collapsed onto you as if overcome with narcolepsy. He sure looked cozy. He smirked while you lamented, “I’m never forgiving any of you, ever.”

“Beel? Are you coming?” Lucifer summoned the cherry on top of this ridiculous parfait. You braced as Beelzebub licked the crumbs off his fingers in preparation. He knew what had to be done.

“Are you ready?” At least he had the decency to ask, unlike six other degenerates. The six lumps of dead weight each grabbed a part of your body, shifting from leans to awkward hugs. There was no way to run.

With an exaggerated “hah!”, Beelzebub’s weight and outstretched arms were enough to send everyone crashing down. You were protected from any real damage by the shell of demon brothers, but they soon had you pinned down against someone’s chest in the world’s most embarrassing cuddle pile.

“Aren’t you guys too old for this?” you asked. “By like, ten thousand years?”

“We were just checking up on you,” Lucifer said.

“Yeah, how did this happen? Hmm..!” Asmodeus’s voice dripped with sarcasm.

Satan draped his leg over yours and not-so-accidentally kicked Lucifer. “You should have told us what you were doing.”

“I think it’s fun.” Belphegor was the only one to admit the truth.

Hands were running through your hair and over your stomach. Somebody was pushing the edge of your mouth up into a smile with their finger. If these guy were so touch-starved, they could have just said so, like sane people.

“My! What do we have here?”

You groaned, partially because everybody was really heavy and partially because you really didn’t need Diavolo to arrive just then.

“My lord, it appears we have walked in on something quite interesting.” Et tu, Barbatos?

”Indeed! Is there room for two more?”

Your “no!” was drowned out by seven resounding yeses.

#hehehehehehe #i love the idea of these idiots taking it in turns to plan a cuddle ambush #obey me #obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date

3K notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 24 days

Text

👁️👄👁️

#oh he's too pretty #his eyes 🥺#obey me #obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date

683 notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 24 days

Text

asserting your dominance over the demon brothers

01. You sit on Lucifer's desk while he's trying to work and slowly, slowly push things off. A pen here, a memo pad there. You make direct eye contact with him the entire time. If he attempts to get up (either to pick things off the floor or to get away from this ridiculousness) you use your pact to make him sit back down.

02. You sit in the driver's seat of Mammon's car. He gets a little grumpy. Mammon thought he was going to drive you around, and generally he's the only one allowed in that driver's seat. When he tells you as much and says to get up, you hit the gas pedal and drift forward. He runs to catch up. When he reaches the car you cheekily do it again.

03. When Leviathan looks away, you grab the controller for Player 1. He can be Player 2 for a few rounds. Upon noticing, he's just confused and thinks he picked up the wrong controller. Until the envy sets in. "But that's my controller," he pouts. "Does it matter? Are you cheating or something?" "No, but..." he doesn't have an excuse, and can't think of any good argument to get his controller back aside from "it's my game..." You get to choose the stage for the next round, winning easily because Leviathan is too distracted by his Player 2 status.

04. You walk up to Satan and put your arm in his empty jacket sleeve. He's not using it. He's at a loss for words trying to figure out what you're up to. "Are you cold? Do you want my jacket?" "No. I'm good." He furrows his brow and stares at you, trying to read you like a book. When he tries to walk away you drag your feet, keeping your arm firmly in that sleeve.

05. You agree to meet Asmodeus out on the town and show up in the most uncoordinated, eye-bleeding outfit you can assemble. You had to raid some of his brother's closets to create it, thus it doesn't fit properly. It turns heads because of how mismatched it is. It's pretty comfortable to wear. Asmodeus is hesitant to approach you. He offers to take you shopping and you turn him down, saying you like your current outfit. You tell him it'd be nice to match and that you'll prepare him an outfit just like yours.

06. You are diligent in your magic studies, always learning new things. Things like body enhancement spells. Spells that will make you really strong for a really short amount of time. Enough time to walk up behind Beelzebub and pick him up like a sack of flour. A guy like him isn't used to that. Beelzebub stiffens up. He's proud you've gotten so strong, but couldn't you have asked first if you wanted to use him for muscle training? It's a little embarrassing. You lift him above your head victoriously and make the most of holding him until your magic wears off.

07. When Belphegor falls asleep with his outdoor clothes on, you take the opportunity to put stuff in his pockets. Fruit, rocks, a Polaroid picture of himself sleeping. They jut out and poke him in the side when he rolls over. He knows it's you behind these mystery items, but you refuse to acknowledge it. If he keeps trying to make you confess, you might have to tie his shoelaces together.

#oh i *cackled* at the first one #and if my mc did that to beel that would be so funny #hes tiny #like genuinely miniscule #an actual microbe #obey me #obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date

1K notes · View notes

thedevilsattendant · 24 days

Note

do you have a picture of lucifer dressed as diavolo's butler please

// I do not :(

I have this chat from the OG game tho :)

Let your imagination go wild~