vigilaent

[vigilaent]

how would y'all feel if i moved everything over to my multi... i really don't want to like on any front cause it's nice having a separate superhero theme over here and i love my layout and my tags but i truly feel like i'd probably be more active with them if i moved them over :/

#out. #the anxiety i feel w how slow i am over here is killing my muse lol #which makes me even MORE slow #and i Just revamped when i coulda plopped them over there to begin with but #i am good at doing things without thinking them through first <3

[vigilaent]

coal - ed eyes watch silent from underneath a mouth - less mask,  blank and blink - less as the bird flutters to its feet.     pointless,  vintage engine idle.     and yet   :   cold hands hover,  twitching movement,  rem sleep stop - stutter,  and still,  just as pointless.     action or inaction,  it's always been damned in this robin's eyes.     the last throes of a fallen angel,  false god.     no bat's boy's wonder left to spare,  so jealous it created another for prayer and called it good.     bruce sometimes finds himself perched atop a church's steeple like a lonely gargoyle,  stone demon,  daring him to cross the threshold.     to kneel for confession and offer up his soul, or if the hollowed ground would simply swallow it whole on the first step.     spit it back out. why even try ?

that's the thing about hiding in the shadows : cowardice blends right into everything else. even courage. heroism.

robin stands to his feet un - aided, and the batman watches. gothamn's knight in shining armor. and its loyal sidekick : insistent on doing the exact opposite of everything it says. “   robin,   ” it says, scraped out like metal over concrete. he doesn't know what else to say. this well known buzz beneath, twitching, stop - stutter, caught somewhere just under the eyelids, the skin, the teeth. they bite down as if something sharp might slip out without permission. spit more cherry red on the black of robin's domino. there's already enough. batman's done enough, to robin.

bruce itches to remove his mask, suddenly. how long had it been since they breathed in the same air without them ? had they ever ? report, sits on the tip of his tongue. instead, he swallows it, and takes a single step closer. “   that's not what i meant.   ” it comes out quiet, blank, blink - less, and yet : it tastes warm in his mouth. warm and fragile, spring - time ice, a careful redistribution of weight. “   what happened ?   ”

@vigilaent dick & bruce — ‘ don’t try to get up. ’

every individual blink feels heavier, each one of bruce’s footsteps sending a new jolt of pain into the base of dick’s skull. he can feel the vibrations of distant cars, there’s a metallic taste in his mouth.

don’t try to get up. well, he wasn’t going to try.

he’s no stranger to head injuries, but that doesn’t mean they’ve become any less of an absolute bitch to deal with. he would’ve called someone else, though. kori, gar, rachel even. she’d have chartered an entire fleet of ubers by now, had him tucked away in a hospital bed, costume neatly folded and tucked away in her backpack.

but he didn’t.

he blinks away the thought, vision still spotty as a different face comes into focus. he can practically hear the frown in bruce’s voice as he rolls onto his side, clumsily shifting an arm beneath his torso as he pushes himself to his feet. all the energy was sapped from his body the moment his head hit the pavement. once he’s turned around, on his hands and knees as he struggles to shift his weight to his feet, he catches a glimpse of the small red stain on the concrete.

no fingers lift to probe at the back of his head, he knows his hair is slick with blood, but there isn’t much of it, so he pushes on — takes to his feet with a wobble.

“ wasn’t planning on staying there all night. ”

#soulspent. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀dick grayson #interaction. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙳⠀:⠀batman #bruce is so annoyed bsfkdsjfls #and annoyING he's so dramatic..... but also misses his bird so badly he is going to Try #trying to mix titans bruce w unburied bruce is a TASK but i like trying to make it work <3 #single dad problems #to me

[vigilaent]

adding bburnham songs to character playlists evokes the same emotion as adding peppy tswift songs to them.... i'm the smartest funniest person alive to me

#out. #sorry. outing myself two for one post #this is about adding microwave popcorn to gar's playlist #what am i supposed to do NOT add that to thee beast boy's playlist o' mine? i am only human #also the future to dick's. and all eyes on me. embarrassing. as if it's my fault it literally fits in every way #listen it's been. a rough year #my sense of humor is a lost cause as is my taste in music. not my fault it's funny even when it's not except for when it is <3

[vigilaent]

rules have been updated !

#psa. #thinking of testing out either moving my high muses here to my main multi since i feel like i'd be more active w them if i did? #OR. just making sure my partners here are ok with a snails pace #cause i do have muse for these freaks over here it just hits in spurts vs the muses i've clumped on my main multi #i revamped this blog before my post concussion symptoms fully set in and it was not smart of me to do that <3 #especially knowing my history even before i bonked my head! #but. i am trying to at least be more accessible between actual replies on discord so pls feel free to ask for that! #if that helps with feeling ignored in actual replies yk since i totally get that #i know i probably shouldn't but i do apologize for so much unpredictability and ily for those who continue to bear w me <3 #w that i have a family zoom in an hour </3

[vigilaent]

Jason and Jason’s rivalry

#mobile. #now why would u say this.... to me

[vigilaent]

normal batman animation

#study. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝙸𝚂𝙼𝚂⠀:⠀bruce #this is just what it's like in my brain 24/7

[vigilaent]

sigh. cue extreme cat emergency. i doubt i'll catch up on any sleep tonight, and i might have to take him in the morning for an emergency depo shot, so my entire weekend might be a bust... but being here can also help w coping so i guess we'll see 🧍‍♂️

first day of my weekend spent catching up on sleep cause i am still severely sleep deprived and it's making my concussion symptoms flare up again lol BUT. as soon as i wake up after my nap i am pouncing on my drafts like an animal >:)

#srb. #pet health // #ask to tag #like i do feel silly letting my writing partners on tumblr dot com know cause real life will always come first etc #but writing is a rly good escape for me from this exact kinda stuff and i hate when even that is out of reach for the time being #like i feel silly but i'm also too exhausted to feel silly #if you see me online tomorrow i am coping very badly but writing is cool like that <3 #if you don't then i am also coping very badly and just unable to write #sorry for all this. 10mins ago i was near hysterics so i be dissociating rn #probably. thankfully my cat is back to a normal bad asthma breathing instead of respiratory distress #which has been his normal for a week now but at least i know he can survive that so. thank god #this poor guy needs a break so very badly i hate pollen season in a 100yo house

[vigilaent]

if jason clenches his teeth any tighter, they're going to snap off in his mouth. like a recurring dream, a nightmare, each pearly white rolled around on the tongue, chewed, swallowed, spat out. being presented a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich from the joker is nightmare fuel if everything else about this wasn't already. if— when. when batman gets him out of here, he's never getting another good night's sleep in his life again.

or, he'll sleep better than he ever has. hell, if he could sleep in this sorry excuse for a fuckin' chair with his hands tied tight enough to fall off, he could sleep fuckin' anywhere. he'd kill to know what day it is. joker, preferably.

the sandwich smells good, is the thing. like pre - sliced, pre - packaged whole wheat, processed to hell and back peanuts and canola oil, grape - flavored gelatin mass ; it might as well be gourmet served on a silver platter. he doesn't think about alfred packing his school lunches with them, the nasty, all - natural stuff and strawberry jam— he doesn't. instead, he clenches his teeth tighter, bites down on nothing while his stomach pangs until something ticks in his mouth. it hurts a harmony to the rest of his body, nothing new, but a part of him wishes for the joker that hurts him for fun instead of the one that feeds him. like some stray. if he's going to survive this, though, he knows he can't look a gift horse in the mouth. gift sandwich. beggars can't be choosers. except, what comes out of his mouth is : “   where do psycho clowns get their groceries, anyway ?   ”

@vigilaent asked: sooner or later, i’ll break your smile.

the threat seemed rather empty with him all tied up. the clown's smile went nowhere, but his head did crane the tiniest bit to one side. "Now, now, Jason. I don't think you'll be breaking anything anytime soon in your um..." he cleared his throat. "Predicament." hehehe. HAHA! he rocked forward in the chair he'd dragged over to sit only a foot or two in front of the other. "OOP!"

joker scrambled to catch the plate that nearly slipped right out of his hands. "Stop making me laugh, I nearly dropped your present." a sandwich. he offered it out towards jason, mismatched eyes flickering down knowingly at the vigilante's bound arms. even if he untied them, he questioned how well he could use them. were fingers usually that shade of purple? "Take it," he encouraged regardless. "It's PB&J. I made it myself." with the opposite hand, he grabbed up under his chair and dragged himself that much closer to jason.

"What's wrong? You don't like grape?" the plate was brought back towards himself, and the clown looked down at the sandwich with pinched eyebrows. "To be fair, I prefer strawberry too. But beggars can't be choosers."

#goregrin #thread. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝙻𝙸𝚅𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙱𝙴𝚈𝙾𝙽𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝚈𝙴𝙰𝚁𝚂⠀:⠀ ̶r̶o̶b̶i̶n̶ #cut to product placement <3 #i too had to try and imagine how jay even gets his jelly #sentences to say #oh to be a grocery store clerk ringing up thee joker

[vigilaent]

first day of my weekend spent catching up on sleep cause i am still severely sleep deprived and it's making my concussion symptoms flare up again lol BUT. as soon as i wake up after my nap i am pouncing on my drafts like an animal >:)

#out. #why is there no pinky promise emoji #anyway. if you leave me things in my inbox to wake up to let's hold hands and slowdance <3

[vigilaent]

method acting dick grayson by sleeping in exclusively 3 hour increments this week

#mobile. #having a 3 day weekend vs likely having to hold the same sleep schedule during it anyway fight. to the death #if my posts seem off the cuff the next couple days it is bc i am genuinely delarious <3 that is not spelled right.... #typoes also 🙏 apologies in advance bc i know i will be getting out replies regardless god bless

[vigilaent]

need more multiverse duplicates threads 🔫

#mobile. #not that i'm mutuals w many duplicates come to think of it but maybe it is time to change that....

[vigilaent]

jim and bruce have an ongoing mobile games competition hit post

#out. #trying to beat each others candy crush score #other times they play those facebook farm games and visit each other sometimes :) #boomer activities etc

[vigilaent]

@rihtual. . . raylan givens.

' what the fuck happened to you ? '

heavy hands hold that much tighter to the hot paper cup keeping him upright at the moment. the steam alone, a saving grace permeating past what feels like water - weight all throughout his body, pooling warm and unpleasant at the front of his forehead. just behind the eyes. it casts the entire room in a sick glow from all directions all at once, whether it be the aftertaste of old bourbon and beer still on his tongue, or the last several nights spent more awake than asleep, or the last several months eroding and eroding and eroding at any last dredge of faith to fix this goddamn department within reach. he's a train running out of track. he knows this. he ignores this, and takes another over - sized sip of over - sized coffee.

it takes his mind several seconds too long to process the question, and when it does, it refuses to procure an answer. a good sign of health, he's sure, if the question itself wasn't already. he's getting too old for this. yes, we'll go with that. “   long night,   ” is all he says after the silence gets too loud. these days, he's been more often than not working solo whenever the chance presents itself, but still ; he reaches back to the small carboard cup - holder at the edge of his desk, three out of four occupied, and un - occupies the opposite corner to his own. it's extended toward the other man with a simple raise of eyebrows, ignoring the slight tremor to his wrist in the movement. “   coffee.   ” it seems he's only capable of mono - syllables at this hour.

#rihtual #interaction. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝙰𝙽𝚂𝚆𝙴𝚁⠀:⠀jim #caffeine addiction <3 #alcoholism // #kind of. hinted at anyway #jim if i ignore my problems surely they will go away gordon #get him outta there..... #until then though he is going to wearily bring his coworkers coffee every morning he gets himself some #which is every day now god bless #my only other jim interaction also involves wearily bringing his coworkers coffee his is in a State

[vigilaent]

jason poses with guns like men do with fish

based on this

#study. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝙷𝙸𝙶𝙷𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝙵𝙰𝙻𝙻 𝚈𝙾𝚄'𝙻𝙻 𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁 𝙶𝚁𝙰𝙲𝙴⠀:⠀jason #his instagram is so cringe i know it is #transmascs see his top surgery scars and message him like omg wtf they put in ur T and he just messages back. lazarus pit. logs out

[vigilaent]

fuck it unburied based bruce :) unburied and 2022 + arkham influences, because i can complain about the politics of thee batman ooc all day, baby! however, the bruce in my other muses backstories will remain separate from my bruce and truer to the vague reputation most other media + comics portray him with. there is some overlap, but i'd like to make the distinction because there will be differences. this is of course subject to plotting with other canon muse mutuals!

feeling torn re: my bruce portrayal cause on one hand there is the batman that i love as an active critique of brutality and vigilantism thin blue line rhetoric repackaged in a bat costume and a man who learned better kind of narrative over time but then on the other hand there is batman unburied bruce who would not fucking say any of that <3

#srb. #out. #this is 90% because as far as what kind of bruce i'm interested in /writing/? unburied is like a little dandelion blooming in my head :) #other canons i can simply rant and rave about. or make an upon request verse or something #anywayy. blending batman 2022 and batman unburied bruce together into a funny little soup #winston duke fc though bc i love him <3

[vigilaent]

myhiraeth​. . .

@vigilaent sent: ❝ are you okay? you’re not hurt? nothing? ❞  from gar for jason in their titans verse perhaps 🥺

[i lost my batboys icons pls forgive] 

“No,” he snaps, shrugging Gar off him in a jerky motion, “I’m fine, shut up.” He throws his mask on the locker room bench, followed quickly by his cape, and in those few moments he realizes that part of him doesn’t want Gar to shut up, or to leave, and he sighs loudly, hoping to stall Gar in case he was about to leave the room. “Maybe like, a little bruised,” He allows, his voice a little gentler than it had been a minute ago. “It’s no big deal though. Don’t tell Dick- last thing I need is him having another excuse to bench me.” With that he does look up at Gar, trying to gauge if the other is going to rat him out, or if they can keep this their secret. If he can trust the other, maybe confessing his bruised ribs would make them stop hurting so much, if he could say it out loud maybe it would seem less serious.  

talking with jason is a lot like walking on legos. sometimes. the rest of the time, it's. . . well, like legos, again, but fun instead of awkward, some makeshift structure built between training mats and san fran asphalt, a current, constant thrum, like the same kind of yellow - green electricity that lives in gar's very veins maybe lives in jason's too. but it's not the same, not really ; gar's is some tuning fork buried halfway in the ground, a stick of metal jabbed up toward the sky to catch all the static right out of the clouds while jason's is. . . the clouds themselves, perhaps. always shifting, moving, to and fro with each gust of wind come his way.

they aren't the same. gar can pretend, sometimes, for their own sake, but while there's something innate to gar, down to the fingerprint, always reaching out, pulling close, jason will always pull away. it's a mirrored likeness, nothing more. still. that's exactly why they could make a good team. right ? gar likes to think so, anyway. but it's almost predictable, gar's shuffle - step forward, jason's slinking back, some stupid dance gar knows all the steps to, but it still feels precarious, chewing through the words on his tongue lest they come all up without his permission. like a single misstep might crack something porcelain. something precious. but jason's not made of porcelain. he's not made of steel either, no matter what some have tried to forge, refined in fire, their own image, no matter that jason himself has. he's just. . . flesh and blood. bone and bruises. human. [ more than gar can say ] and gar couldn't miss the way jason's body pinched and arced in on itself as they returned to base, even now, stood there like he's going to bolt any second unless gar beats him to it.

of course, they don't. no, instead, they hold very still, at least for a beat, adrenaline - warm blood curling cool in their chest before dispersing in a quick breath. more like a laugh, or something like it, almost, before gar seals it back in with a mimed zipping motion. “   mums the word,   ” they swear, expression smoothed and serious and splintering on a small grin. “   though, i mean— you should probably. . . get that checked out, at least. or dick really will have an excuse to bench you, trust me.   ” at this, they take just a single step closer, shoulders purposefully lax, gaze easy instead of soft, not wanting to chafe on something sharp. baby steps. on top of legos. “   can't keep a secret from dick unless you're thee batman himself, i think. second greatest detective or something— it's honestly kind of off - putting ? you'd think he's more psychic than rachel, sometimes. he's weird like that.   ”

#myhiraeth #thread. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝙶𝙴𝚃 𝚂𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙻𝙸𝙵𝙴 𝙸𝙽 𝙼𝙴⠀:⠀beast boy #please let this formatting be normal... #sorry this is so long i did not mean to ramble that much..... iam incapable of shutting up <3 #so is gar! which works perfectly :) #also sorry if this is clunky i haven't written gar in ages but hell if i missed it!!! my boy [gn] #verse. . .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝚃𝙸𝚃𝙰𝙽𝚂

[vigilaent]

feeling torn re: my bruce portrayal cause on one hand there is the batman that i love as an active critique of brutality and vigilantism thin blue line rhetoric repackaged in a bat costume and a man who learned better kind of narrative over time but then on the other hand there is batman unburied bruce who would not fucking say any of that <3

#out. #cause like they cannot exist in the same space in my head they are entirely different people #2022 and arkham based bruce is antithetical to unburied bruce and idk which one i would wanna write </3 #cause like. the former is kind of integral to my dick and jason's bg considering #less dick but definitely jason since he IS arkham based #cause like. bruce not killing joker is easy across the board but the level in which my jason Hates bruce #depends heavily on bruce's entire shtick as this savior to gotham who loves dishing out violence but refuses to commit to it #fancies himself a hero who never kills while finding in perfectly acceptable to like. maim human beings lol #and who fancies himself one of the GoodTM rich guys while at the same time wasting millions on tech and new batmobiles and suits etc #idk. which. i do like! cause irl batman as this famous superhero figure literally everyone on planet earth knows about lol #i like critiquing what he stands for while believing in his ability to change legitimately #like bruce's whole thing is learning from the people around him for the better #BUT........ UNBURIED BRUCE...... #is so. so good and i need to write him like now now immediately #and i also feel more confident to write him? idk </3 #like if i write unburied bruce he will exist on a different plain that the rest of my muses #like. threads with them will not be within the same canon as the threads w bruce #cause their makeup is just wrapped too tightly in an entirely different batman #idk what to do!!!!!! rah..... unburied brainrot taking me apart piece by piece rn #girl help