aickerman-s

[aickerman-s]

Mr. & Mrs. Ackerman 🖤

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Леви и Микаса в Рождество под омелой. Кстати говоря, я прочитала, что это ошибочное суждение, что если пара встанет под омелой, то обязана поцеловаться. Поцелуй под омелой - не спантанное решение, так пара объявляет о своей помолвке. Вот так :)

Последняя цифровая работа на неопределённый срок, увы, но мой графический планшет окончательно сказал мне «ариведерчи!»

Если захотите мне помо��ь насобирать на новый, то можете задонатить на карту или подписаться на бусти:

https://boosty.to/art_pizhma

4276130023711157

Моральная поддержка приветствуется, буду рада подписке на телегу, там я более активная:

https://t.me/artpizhma

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AU The Last of Us 🍂

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Fear and Fidelity - Chapter 4: Children No Longer

After unpleasant encounters with both Mr Kirstein and Captain Ackerman, Mikasa reflects on her duty to her family.

Chapter 4 is out!

#my fics #rivamika #rivamika fic #rivamika fanfic #rivamika fanfiction #levi x mikasa #levimika

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*cough* years

Me, once every couple of months:

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This is more a less a note to myself…

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😗💋

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❤️‍🩹

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😙 Hehehe...

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For my dear @onigiri-dorkk 🌕✨

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your constant support to my work and for creating beautiful stories and drawings of our beloved Rivamika.

This illustration is based on the fanfic This isn't a date, I leave here the link so you can read it.

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RivaMika - By The Lake

YouTube | DeviantArt

Mikasa wanted to have a memory of their date by the lake, and Levi isn't really one for pictures but he accedes anyways.

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We will always be together. In any of the worlds. In any dimension. In any event scenario. I'll find you, just call.

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My Rivamika fic “Night Changes” according to the AI. It’s so beautiful that it physically hurts 🥺

#Obsessed with the last mikasa 😍

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ACKERKIDS' ACKERKICK

YEARS LATER

[aickerman-s]

Hello again👋

Hey all, long time no see.

For those who uhhhhh still remember me lol, I wanted to write a little update post on where I've been/why I disappeared etc.

So, I've probably not logged on to tumblr for about a year and there's many reasons for that. I've been debating whether or not to explain them at all for a while now, but I think I wanted to just get it out there and be open about stuff for a bit. This blog, and this community has meant a lot to me over the years, and the support I got from it all in my writing is more important to me than y'all know.

Basically, there's a (very!) good/positive reason that I've been away, and also a not-so-good one. Details below:

First, the good reason! The very good exciting awesome amazing reason: I got my dream writing job! I had the amazing opportunity to work as a video game writer on a project I'm so proud of and so incredibly grateful to have been a part of. Understandably, I was quite busy with that for the better part of 2023! The game is out now, and if anyone would like the link/to learn more about it please feel free to send me a dm! (Like, please, I'd love to brag about it!) Not going to post the link publically simply because I've always preferred to keep my blog free of irl/professional details, etc.

Some of you may remember I was briefly part of another game project a few years ago as lead writer, which fell through. Ever since I've been trying to get my first published credit, and now I have it <3 I'm a professional writer!!! 🥳 I'm very proud of the work we did, and I hope some of y'all will try it out!

But if working two jobs for most of the year wasn't enough, there's been something else that's kept me in a strange place this year - the not-so-good reason I've been quiet. This one is a bit more personal, and something I didn't want to reveal until now: content warning here, for both physical and mental health discussion.

Nearly two years ago now, I developed some rather debilitating symptoms of an unknown medical condition. While I've had chronic pain from another condition for most my life, the symptoms this new condition left me with were, quite frankly, terrifying. And terrifyingly, they appeared pretty much overnight. While I don't want to get into all the details, I've had to change and adapt a lot of things in my life to try and come to terms with this new normal - because sadly, these symptoms have not went away.

For the first 10/11 months or so of this condition, I was pretty much brute forcing my way through it - trying to tough my way through life as normal as if everything wasn't suddenly so much harder than it already was. About a year ago, I reached a breaking point. I had been hoping that all of this was just temporary, and was beginning to see that it wasn't.

While I had started the incredibly long and draining process of tests, hospital and doctor's appointments to try and investigate my condition, I realised at the start of 2023 that I had also become scarily depressed. I've struggled with and overcome depression before in my life, but this felt like so much uncharted territory. To be perfectly honest, I've always been proud of my own willpower and determination when dealing with depression in the past, but this year was the closest I've ever felt to truly giving up.

...And that's scary to admit - to myself, let alone anyone reading this! But admitting it pushed me into seeking the extra support I needed (therapy) throughout this journey. And a journey it is - while I'm much better mentally than I was in January, and I'm now on some medication to help alleviate the worst symptoms of my condition, my diagnosis is still a ways off. In the meantime, I've been coming to terms with the changes I've needed to make in my life, and the ones still to come.

It's been a lot, this year, trying to juggle a new disability and a new dream job - on top of the old job, poor mental health, and the complexity of coming to terms with the word 'disability'. There were times throughout the year when I wanted to open up tumblr and just browse through some rivamika internet goodness.

But I couldn't. My perfectionism and imposter syndrome and all these other factors led to me putting quite a lot of pressure on myself - every time I thought about tumblr I thought "I can't log on, I don't have any new chapters to post; I haven't responded to people's messages; it's already been way too long since I've updated; I'm such a terrible fanfic writer I've been inconsistent for years; I'm not allowed to log on unless I update a fic, and even then I'll have to apologise for being so late-".

So, I didn't. In all the weirdness I managed to convince myself that I would come back to... I don't know, interrogations or something 😂 It sounds quite silly now that I type it out. But I'm in a better place now, and I'm hoping I can get back to the no-pressure fun of writing fics soon.

As for my fanfics, would you believe me anymore if I said I still plan to finish them? 😂 I've even had drafts of the next chapters of both A Man, in a Bar and Fear and Fidelity sitting here for ages, but I'd managed to convince myself they weren't good enough to post. I've been thinking about them a lot lately, which is a good sign I think. I've been itching to write Levi and Mikasa again. So while I won't make any promises or such about updates/schedules or whatever, I just wanted to let it be known that I still want to continue these stories. (If I, and the readers, can even remember what happened in them😅). I might even take some prompts soon to get back into the swing of things!

But yeah... that's my update! It's probably the most personal I've ever gotten on this blog, and I hope that's okay. I felt like I needed it - to clear the air, of sorts. I sincerely hope everyone in this lil' community has been doing well, and is having a safe and happy holiday season. Thanks for reading, if you've managed to get through this big personal post! I love and appreciate everyone I've interacted with through this blog, and hope to get back into it again <3

#personal #long post #cw: health #cw: mental health #hope this explains my abscence and infequency #apologies to anyone I might have totally ghosted over the last year or so #😅

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1 hour drawing

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— I love you, Captain...🥀

You're late

AU: Levi is dead