ashofthecosmos

[ashofthecosmos]

This is a formal goodbye to this blog.

It was a nice run, it really was, and I’ve made so many friends as a result! I’ve laughed with many, created things with others, and overall had a blast. 

However, due to personal reasons, I’m not going to be on this account for any longer. I will be creating a new account, though I will not link it here because I do not want to keep getting attacked nor do I want to keep running due to someone making false claims about me and those close to me. I appreciate everyone who followed me, read my works, and were there since the beginning. I appreciate every single one of you and I hope everyone has a good life. 

You can read more about the incident here. Do NOT attack, fake-claim, or ANYTHING to the person mentioned in the post. I do not want to start anything. I hope, one day, they’ll be able to grow and prosper and get out of their abusive situation to hopefully be okay. As for me, I’m moving on from this situation in this way. I hope they’ll find a way to move on too.

#Serious post #The End #false accusations #the inkwell system tw #grooming allegations #tis tw #clearing things up #ashofthecosmos #soulofangst #stardusted-menace #the inkwell system allegations

[ashofthecosmos]

this unit on yo mama jokes will be on the midterm, but you will not be expected to know the original categories. instead, we’ll be focusing on the kinds of dadaist reinterpretations we’ve been doing in class. if you’ve been paying attention and keeping up with the assignments you should do just fine.

[ashofthecosmos]

A PSA

It has come to my attention that @/the-starry-inkwell and, by extension, their new group of friends, is spreading lies about @ashofthecosmos, @soulofangst, and myself again, this time via their tumblr bio or otherwise, I'm not sure- and are sending hate asks that simply assume they are correct. Either way, I have come on all three of our behaves to tell the whole, actual story, since otherwise, on surface level, you would have to take their word for it.

(A NOTE: PLEASE LISTEN TO ANY AND ALL ACTUAL GROOMING AND OR INNAPROPRATE MINOR EXPLOITATION ACCUSATIONS. MOST ARE NOT LIKE THIS CASE, AND ARE EXTREMELY SERIOUS.)

I met Inkwell around 2018 via a roleplaying server centered around an at the time pseudo-famous deviantart artist GraWolfQuinn, and in this, they immediately decided to roleplay a character with extreme suggestive nature towards mine. I was 15 at the time, meaning from the age gap, they were around 13-12. I had no clue of this, and continued right along as if they were my age, due to the server's rules. All innocent, all in good fun, except for their characters who had a backstory deep-rooted in rape and torture. (They would later INSIST this was the influence of another friend.)

Over two years, we bonded and became the best of friends, laughing and supporting each other- or rather, I supported them, as they'd often threated suicide and self harm several times and I would have to repeatedly talk them out of it. They were in an abusive situation, which is why I kept accepting this behavior as normal, and not toxic. They'd ignore my ideas, ignore me, and treat me overall like trash, under the guise of being my friend. I introduced them to my friends, Super-parad1se and OoodlesOfDoodles, and Parker, who was my partner at the time- exactly my age, at 17 years old. I also helped them realize they were trans, and a DID system, though they are not diagnosed. (I will not begin to fakeclaim, please do NOT go fakeclaiming them, they are still presumably in that abusive situation and need help and therapy that I could not begin to provide to them.)

Then, in 2020, inkwell introduced me to AshOfTheCosmos. We were shy at first- he was 17, yet to turn 18 due to a late birthday, and yet we were fast friends. Not too long after that, however, I made the worst mistake of my goddamn life.

Inkwell asked to date me. I did not bother asking how old they were- I simply assumed. Their writing style, to my immature brain, seemed to think their writing style and handling situations to be around my age, instead of three years below me. (I was in an abusive situation as well, and thus completely missed the social cues that might have strayed me from this mistake.)

And so, I agreed. I had genuinely adored their company, and as much as Parker warned me of dating someone I didn't truly know, I figured it would be fine. Ash also fell for this trickery, being in a similarly abusive situation, and asked them, completely unaware. We both identified as Asexual, yet they forced sexual situations on us, despite similarly identifying as Ace. They changed this label, as did Ash and I, though I was because of being attracted to Ash, and Ash simply had hormonal blockage due to a medical condition.

Regardless, skipping a few dropped friends, all three of us were happy, for a while- especially when Soul came into the picture. I met Soul via a Henry Stickmin blog, and I helped them be okay with stimming again. They didn't quite fall for the trick Inkwell was pulling- but they had revealed themself to be a very pushy and impractical person, and unfortunately, they convinced them Soul, Ash, and myself that it was okay. I tried to cut it off when I turned 18, truly unsure about the relationship, but they told me it was okay for me to stay. From there, they kept answering differently when asked their age- 20's, 30's, 40's, you name it, all under the name of their DID.

Then, in 2022, we found out their true body age. They were 15 at the time, and are most likely 16 now. I asked out of curiosity, because the way they were handling situations were... a tad childish, and had the air of not being mature enough to understand ones faults. When they confessed to being 15, all three of us immediately ended the relationship, disgusted with them for convincing us it was okay, and disgusted with ourselves for ever thinking of a minor that way, even accidentally. We then ended our friendships with them, as they really didn't like the breakup and even cussed us out and told us we were being horrible to "a suicidal child".

We, understandably, slowly ended contact with them, one by one, me being the last. I stayed because I foolishly thought there was maybe SOME redeeming qualities to them, and I tried to save them, and didn't want to leave them without a friend, without someone to turn to, even if I hated what they did to me, to us all. I just wanted them to have a stable support group. This led to frequent bouts of depressive spirals and anxiety attacks, until Ash implored me to see what I was putting myself through.

So, I finally cut them off, in which they accused us all of grooming, like they didn't lie to us, and left. After the worst panic attack of my life from cutting off someone I'd known for four years (not to mention them immediately going around and spreading lies), I apologized for any and all hurt we may have caused, an apology from all of us, and blocked them anywhere and everywhere I could. I'd hoped I'd never have to hear from them or about them ever again.

It's funny, really, that this happened now of all times, because I was just beginning to forgive them for all the things they did, all the times they hurt me, hurt us, baited self harm and suicide (as in saying a knife now had blood on it as we panicked and tried to talk them out of cutting, to which they then laughed and said it was pizza sauce), accusing us, hurting us, manipulating us, forcing sexual situations on us. I was beginning to think they could move on just as well as I, that they'd find a support group, that they'd grow and change and get the help they needed.

I suppose the joke is on me, for ever trusting them again. I hope they someday find peace and love, but I will never again trust them, and I will always ask for an age before every single in-depth interaction, and reject any conversation with anyone below 18.

... Truly, I should've been doing that anyways, but I suppose life teaches you its lessons the hard way, when you're not already taught.

Thank you for reading, I appreciate your affinity for learning the truth, instead of blindly following what someone says. I hope everyone's day goes well, that everyone on the east coast stays safe from Hurricane Ian, and that everyone has a wonderful day.

[POST LAST EDITED 9/30/2022]

#the inkwell system allegations #the inkwell system tw #grooming allegations #tis tw #clearing things up #ashofthecosmos #soulofangst #Stardusted-menace

[ashofthecosmos]

Hello, I just heard about you and a few of your friends from someone named the starry inkwell who has just exposed you and your friends for being adults in a relationship with a minor. And don't use DID or any other mental disorder to try to excuse your gross behavior because at the end of the day you are but an 18 year old in a relationship with a 14 year old and that is very disturbing and gross.

We're not in a relationship with them. Please check in with both sides before you assume, thank you.

And I wouldn't dream of using DID as a form of excuse for anything. We own up to mistakes and pride ourselves in it. Also the person you are referring to is actually an ex-friend of ours, who is 16, not 14.

Edit: 16 since we last saw/talked to them. Not sure of their age now, but I’m just going off of that.

#ask to tag #proshipper tw #tw proshipper #Again idk how to tag this

[ashofthecosmos]

You and Soul have just been publicly exposed as being adults in a relationship with minors. Don't say "proshipper dni" and then pull a classic proshitter move of grooming minors. That is wrong and gross and nothing can excuse gross behavior like that.

We're not in a relationship with minors lmao? Besides when we were also minors. I genuinely don't know what you're talking about. You should honestly check with both sides before you accuse someone of such a horrible thing instead of going off of what you first hear. I understand how one can jump to conclusions, it's human instinct, but it'd be nice if you checked in with the other parties involved. If you don't mind me asking, where did you hear this? You don't need to give names. Just "a friend" or something can suffice! You don't even need to answer. I just want to know. :)

Thank you for your time!

#Yeah we're not in a relationship with minors #we think that's gross #uhh how should I tag this though #tw proshipper #ig? #ask to tag

[ashofthecosmos]

every child matters 🧡

September 30th is known as Orange Shirt Day, the National Day for Truth and Reconciliation, across Canada and North America in remembrance of those who suffered in US/Canadian Indian Residential Schools. We recognize the harm done to generations of children by the Indian Residential Schools and share our collective histories as an affirmation of our commitment to ensure that Every Child Matters!

Remembering the estimated 150,000 Indigenous children who endured the residential schooling system, and its trauma that continues to be felt to this very day by survivors and their families.

Children were taken around this time of year to attend these ‘schools’, and often enough, when the school season was over, they were not returned to their families. We knew many suffered and passed, but could have never guessed the atrocious number of children’s remains that we are now finding.

As of May 2022, The remains of over 6,000 children have been recovered from unmarked graves at the locations of these former residential schools within Canada, and 500 have been discovered at 19 schools in the US. However, the Interior Department said that number could climb to the thousands or even tens of thousands.

For reference to help you digest how large the numbers will become when all schools have been properly investigated, there were approximately 139 schools in Canada and so far only (as of May 2022) 36 investigations have been completed in Canada. The US has identified more than 400 schools that were highly supported by the U.S. government during their operations, and more than 50 associated burial sites, a figure that could grow exponentially as research continues.

This wasn’t as long ago as you might think. The last residential school closed in 1997, only twenty-five years ago.

“Kill the Indian, Save the man” was a common phrase in these schools. Being Indians was savage, but we were ‘savable’ in the eyes of their Christian / Catholic God if we were stripped of the things that made us us.

I am lucky enough to know survivors. I am alive because of survivors.

Survivors taught us younger generations about the horrors they dealt with in residential schools. Beaten, tortured, murdered. Watching other children die from diseases grown in their unclean living situations. ‘Forgetting’ what tribe a child is from and giving them to another reservation to care for until the following year when they’d be taken away again. Raped girls who survived traumatic births at a young age only for their babies to be thrown in the furnace. Sterilizing boys and girls so that if they were released they couldn’t create any more ‘indians’.

These children were ripped from their homes, watched their parents die if they fought to keep their children, were forced to cut their hair (our hair is as sacred as our traditional clothing), and beaten if caught speaking in their native languages. As a 'reward' for good behavior in school, certain children were sent away to live with white families as slaves to 'learn the white way' during break periods between school semesters/years. 

Today, keep the families of those who lost loved ones who never returned, and the survivors who lived through unimaginable trauma in your hearts. Wear orange. Join a protest. Support indigenous peoples. Share our stories. Educate yourself on our history, not the false history written in books by white men, churches, and governments that supported and endorsed these institutions.

Because Every Child Matters.

Resources where you can learn more:

orange shirt day org

npr

interactive map (scroll to find)

[ashofthecosmos]

Reltadune

[ashofthecosmos]

[ashofthecosmos]

Drawing characters I've never really drawn because my moots like them

[ashofthecosmos]

in honor of the new mp100 season and the greatest post of all time

[ashofthecosmos]

A library in britain created an alien mascot that uses they/them pronouns as part of a program to promote youth reading and terfs are now demanding the library explain how the alien fucks

[ashofthecosmos]

YOU HAVE ENTERED

RADICAL SATURDAY

[ashofthecosmos]

loved the lana skye case it was so intense!!! and a lot of fun

[ashofthecosmos]

hi smurg and i have come to bring u our gospel

[ashofthecosmos]

hi smurg and i have come to bring u our gospel

[ashofthecosmos]

King: The Roomba vacuum cleaner just beat me to a piece of popcorn I dropped on the floor

King: This is how the war against the machines begins

[ashofthecosmos]

Coloring an amazing art made by @the-other-cross-san !!

I'm so amazed by your artstyle! ✨️✨️ It's nice to be able to collaborate with a pro artist like you! Thanks for your pictures of Narumitsu~ I love it very much! Keep up the good work and stay healthy💕💕💕💕💕