confused-cryptid

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sometimes when im mad i'll write "):<". sometimes i'll write a strongly worded email. sometimes i watch kung fu panda for and write a scathing reveiw. sometimes i get just a bit heated and write a seven page essay on human cloning. one day i will write a book im so furious.

#writing #anger

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wrote a small, baby, six page essay. the hyper fixation hitting strong this time folks.

#i DO NOT want to read this to a class #cant wait to be booed off the stage yet again #my teacher will hate grading this #im going to add more. screw you beth

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Feeling like this would be something for you?

Something feels wrong about that 3d model of a train

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small non-exhaustive collection of laios making That Face

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Can we all reblog and comment ‘hi’ on this post for no other reason than social cohesion?

#hi

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Kung Fu Panda 4, and The Grief That Comes Alongside It

Kung Fu Panda 4, is what some would consider the movie of the decade, a magnum opus perhaps, if, of course, they were compulsive liars and liked to watch the world burn.

With a new movie comes new audiences, better animation, new dialogue, new characters, and of course new scenes. And you may think, why not just make a new movie? Especially if every single one of those aspects is worse. Well, the answer is simple, money. If they slap a number behind a popular movie, it will not only drag in first-time viewers but will drag the diehard fans back from their graves.

Since this movie has had a fanbase for nearly sixteen years, the sequels are starting to cater to the new generations, a younger audience. While the first movie was meant for children to watch, it would be categorised as a family movie because the writers put in the effort to make it high quality and watchable for all ages. Kung Fu Panda 4 on the other hand would solely be classified as a children’s movie. This means that for most over the age of ten, this movie becomes that of boredom and nearly unwatchable.

The newest movie in this franchise has decided to make a unique choice when it comes to the animation style and character designs. This new stylized animation makes characters look tacky: their eyes are bigger, their faces rounder, their voices goofier. This also lent to the movie being portrayed more towards children. But, they cannot drastically change the design of characters from previous movies so they look less harmonious with each other because they are drawn differently. This was extremely distracting and took away from what little good this movie had.

Every character in this movie seemed just a bit off. Their words did not seem to match the previously introduced characters, and the new characters didn’t seem ever to sound right. The characters seemed to have less life breathed through them, instead being replaced by fart jokes and other childlike humor. I also really loved how the majority of the main characters took a vow of silence for the runtime of the movie, just so we could hear more of all the other new characters. 

While there were character arcs they felt rushed and didn’t expand on the minute details or the nuances within their personalities. They also relied heavily on stereotypes and patterns that characters in many movies so often go through. The moment I saw Zhen’s character, I could accurately predict her entire story arc. There was a limited amount of foreshadowing on this, but it could still be understood what would happen based on common movie stereotypes. Her redemption arc was not even done naturally, but instead choppy and rushed. There was also the main villain of the movie, The Chameleon. She had such little screen time and not nearly enough development in her character. Her motives also didn’t make sense; her actions were based on her desire to learn kung fu, but we learned in the first movie that anyone can learn kung fu no matter their size, shape, or past. I think if we wanted to have a more cohesive storyline we could instead merge Zhen and The Chameleon into one character, creating a unique storyline while also giving the villain more screen time.

And finally, I’d like to mention how creative they were using the 3 R’s: Reuse, Recycle, and Reduce. I love how the writers decided that the jokes they made were so funny that they should reuse each a minimum of three times each. They also did an excellent job of recycling scenes from previous movies but with different characters. Like the opening scene from Kung Fu Panda 2 and the closing scene from Kung Fu Panda 3. But ultimately I think their best action was to reduce. Reduce the budget that is. The previous three movies had a budget of 130-150mil, but they decided to save up their money and only give this movie a budget of 85mil.

Kung Fu Panda is a franchise I have watched since I was a child. When I was younger I would anticipate the release of every new movie, but as I have gotten older I realise that the bigger the number next to the main title the worse the movie will become. Making sequels is like squeezing the water out of a sponge. If you don’t dip it back into the bucket, it will become dry of passion and empty of love. This movie reminds me of the ever-passing time that I once called my childhood. It is passing me by so that movies I once loved will only be filled with nostalgia and every new one will seem worse than the last. I thank the writers that cared about the movies that they made even if they were for younger audiences, because they allowed them to be enjoyed by the entire family and not just for the toddlers in the audience. Ultimately, I am grateful for the time in my life when movies had passion and love going into their creation, and while I am sad to see it go, c’est la vie.

#movie review #kung fu panda #kfp 4

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i need something stronger than melatonin. like anethstisia.

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Reblog to kill it faster

#die faster

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Can we just appreciate how sexy long gloves are?

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283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.

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among us is an allegory for mccarthyism