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cooking-pot · 2 days
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that chimera ain't right
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cooking-pot · 2 days
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Being polyam is FR like "I'm not aro/ace but I believe in their beliefs"
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cooking-pot · 3 days
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apple car^
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cooking-pot · 4 days
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has anyone else ever had a fanfic that just... haunts them? like it's been months and maybe even years since you read it, but it just lingers with you and you can never truly leave behind the imprint it made on you? and maybe it's just a single line, one sentence that you can't shake off, that takes up residence in your mind and stays there, feeding into your psyche and subtly influencing your brainspace and maybe even your writing or other works?
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cooking-pot · 4 days
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i should make a side blog where i pretend to be human and try to explain anatomical/social questions from others but without research and how i think humans probably function thatd be fucking hilarious
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cooking-pot · 4 days
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cooking-pot · 5 days
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pranking the new kid in the firing squad by telling all the other guys not to pull the trigger during his first execution
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cooking-pot · 6 days
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you can do more than one of these if you want
actually, you can do anything you want
live unapologetically and without restraint
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cooking-pot · 6 days
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Hi hello my ask is i want more size 3 frames. thoughts? bc Barbarosa might be the sexiest coolest best mech in the game but sometimes you want variety you know
Strap yourself in, my friend, because have I got the fucking Core Bonus for you.
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IPS-N is the premier manufacturer for gas station mech pills, or as they like to call them, Structure Enhancing Engineering.
Simply slide some of this shit into your favorite Size 2 mech and your dreams have come true!
What dipshit's gonna try to tell a Size 3 Gorgon what to do? Fucking nobody who ain't about to experience episode 12 of G Witch.
Y'all should watch G Witch by the way
Remember, Fomorian is Gaelic for "Here's a list of mechs you can make Size 3 by taking three levels in IPS-N"
Sagarmatha
Drake
Lancaster
Tortuga
Monarch
White Witch
Balor
Gorgon
The Fucking Enkidu because I guess we're putting a goddamn cinderblock on the fucking gas pedal and releasing the parking break and letting RA sort the rest out
Iskander
"Big Sal" Saladin
Genghis Mk. 1 "Worldkiller" Actually maybe pump the brakes here, buddy.
And if you really wanna be a size queen about your mech, put this in your Barbarossa and piss off everyone in a 12 mile radius by blocking out the goddamn sun.
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cooking-pot · 8 days
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I think this might be a masterpiece
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cooking-pot · 8 days
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Hi there @imperialinquisition ! It's less than 6am for me, and sleep is a lie! .
To start with, Vex is absolutely right. Putting players against player statblocks is a really bad idea. They just aren't balanced for pvp, and it's really easy to get into an unfun game state. That being said, with standard NPC classes and templates, you can still get a pretty decent approximation to the HA catalog.
Our goal isn't to match play style and abilities 1-1, but to mimic the general aesthetic and mechanical themes of each mech. Remember, regardless of how much a line of Shermans might look exactly like the battle you're envisioning, if you stack too many NPCs of the same type than your players aren't like to have a good time.
Let's start with the Sherman; the classic Harrison Armory mech and second most common chassis in the galaxy. Of note are its powerful heat management systems, and focus on energy weaponry
A very close NPC analogue is the Scourer, a mid-range striker whose powerful damage output is offset by the high self-heat imposed by its energy weapons. Its Thermal Lance is analagous to the Sherman's Sol-Pattern Laser Rifle or Andromeda-Pattern Heavy Laser Rifle, and the optional weapon Pulse Laser has a line template similar to that of the solidcore. The scourer punishes parties that let it alone, allowing it it Focus Down targets, and activate its Cooling Module to clear heat.
Continuing with HA's most iconic mechs, the Saladin was the chassis of choice for John C. Harrison I. "Big Sal" is generally known for its ability to protect allies with a variety of shielding technologies, as well as its own sizable chassis.
Here you have a couple options, with both the Bastion and the Aegis embodying different aspects of the Saladin's strengths. The Aegis more closely matches the Saladin's energy shield systems. The Defense Net trades mobility for a burst shield imposing difficulty, similar to the Enclave-Pattern Support Shield, and the HA Blackwall optional system, though imposing involuntary movement for crossing it instead of damage, mimics the LoS denial and crossing penalty of the Hardlight Defense System. Aegis have strong defensive abilities, but have trouble moving once they are set up; players are encouraged to find a way around them rather than through them.
On the more physical side of things, the Bastion does a better job if you're leaning into the physical bulk of the Saladin. Matching "Big Sal" for size, and carrying similar ability to act as cover. The Near-Threat Denial System proves an analogue to the retaliatory abilities of the Tachyon Loop and NOAH-Class NHP, punishing attacks originating near the bastion.
The very first mech frame, the Genghis Mk I was built to burn worlds. Though its descendant, the Genghis Mk II has been toned down in line with ThirdComm expectations, it is still notorious for its use of heat and flame. The Pyro works off of very similar concepts, boasting similarly high armor and low speed.
Like the Genghis, the Pyro boasts a Flamethrower, Explosive Vents and inbuilt Insulation that work very similar to their player character counterparts. The Napalm Bomb optional is a decent stand-in for HAVOK Charges, and even the less common strategy of using the Genghis's excellent heat management for heat-intensive flight can be approximated by the Explosive Jet. Pyros as extremely slow nonetheless, make sure that they are placed in a position where they'll be a relevant part of the fight.
k im tired now so these last bunch aren't gonna be so fancy or good at all. The Barborossa is really big but also basically artillery. Use the goliath if all you care about is size, but otherwise the bombard, maybe a size or 2 larger than typical is a good idea. Iskander is a seeder. push people around, push em into mines, make everything explosive. check out grav-spike and det-spike for things like clamp bombs.
I got no idea how to make a tokugawa, its whole exposed shtick isn't something I think is replicated in npc stuff, but the Enkidu is already introduced as a size 2 ultra berserker. hellfire projector, superhot, unstoppable.
napoleon is also basically a bastion. sorry if you care about napoleon. give it pause engine or like death counter
Sunzi's whole teleport everything deal is pretty similar to the mirages. Be careful though, mirages can be really annoying because invisible. remember to reflavor the text and stuff, the mirage names are all implying that its sensor ghosts and shit but the sunzi actually teleports so yeah
lancer question: can I use PC mech licenses as NPCs? It seems a bit strange to attack a Harrison Armory installation and fight Assault NPCs rather than Shermans, but I don’t know if the mech was balanced for that.
Do not pit your players against PC mechs. The game is not balanced for that.
It's nearly 6 AM here and I need to sleep. Send me an ask later about how to make equivalents of the PC mechs using NPCs.
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cooking-pot · 10 days
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Is word of mouth really gonna make me watch the Fallout show....
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cooking-pot · 10 days
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more adhd things
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cooking-pot · 10 days
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Marcille: "Uhhh . . . I'm so hungry . . ."
Laios: "We should have waited until we were at the end of this maze to kill and eat the minotaur. Senshi, what do we have left?"
Senshi: "We're good on water due to that aquifer leaking into the maze, but otherwise all we have left is my spices and this unopened bottle of benadryl."
Laios: "Hmm . . ."
Marcille: "Laois, look at me. Benadryl isn't food."
Laios: "I know that, but what if we were to kill and eat the Hat Man?"
Chilchuck: "WHAT?"
Senshi: "What's the Hat Man?"
Marcille: *sighs* "It's a shared hallucination, generally induced by certain kinds of drug intake. Some mages have tried to study if it's real but were unable to prove that it stayed tangible or present after they sobered up."
Senshi: "So that benadryl would lure the Hat Man to us, and give us a chance to fight it? That will be tough. Sounds like we will have to kill, cook and eat it all before the medicine wears off if it will lose tangibility otherwise."
Laois: "That's it! If we need only one or two of us to kill the Hat Man, then the rest can be dosed up only right before the meal is done cooking."
Senshi: "There's one problem with that. Dwarves are basically immune to any tallmen drug that isn't prescription strength. I'll need half the bottle just to have enough time to eat the meal. Chilchuck, you'll be able to use it the most efficiently because of how little you weigh. I can make sure that the fire is ready, but you'll have to fight the Hat Man alone and dose Marcille afterwards to help you with the cooking prep. Laios and I shouldn't risk taking more than needed just to eat."
Chilchuck: "ARE YOU CRAZY?! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW IF THE HAT MAN IS REAL! And I don't do the fighting in this group! There's NO WAY that-"
Narrator: And so with their plan formulated, Chilchuck took a heavy dose of benadryl and prepared to fight the Hat Man in single combat.
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cooking-pot · 12 days
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“I’m going to drive through Appalachia, should I be scared of the inbred hill folk and the cryptids? 😱😱😱😱” no bitch, be scared of sliding off a mountain into a valley and not being found for months or years.
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cooking-pot · 12 days
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If your regular everyday clothes* were put on a mannequin, and placed in a group of other mannequins that are dressed in regular street clothes of your region, could the people who know you spot the mannequin who is "you" from clothes alone?
*if you are of an unusual size or build, assume for the sake of this thought experiment that they've found clothing items that are otherwise identical to yours, but able to fit to a standard mannequin
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cooking-pot · 14 days
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