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unusual-raccoon
Idiot Writer
bbasmos
i don't wanna be a monster anymore
ruhikafabric-blog
Untitled
jessybarnes
"No! Not without you!"
emilerosewater
EMILE JULIUS ROSEWATER
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oh bby u r so fine. u wan sum fuk?
Jennie, please marry me.
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Aspirations I won't accomplish
To pass the time, I listen to music and imagine scenes that would pair well. I'm not sure if all people do this, but I feel I do it much better than you would. That is the honest truth. But I doubt I'd do it better than others (pardon me if composition is your profession).
Before you start, no. Daydreaming isn't my aspiration. My underlying interest(s) rest in music. I study in a field of knowledge that is forcefully far apart from the arts. An area that tries to implement itself as a science and mocks everything that's lower. Expectations are made, standards are set high, failure to succeed is crushing and the world is competitive. Doing what you love must be nice. It's okay not to make it big, it's okay not to be the elite. I'd like that. But the world sadly, is not so nice.
I wish I could make "being alive, wonderful" a reality, but I can't. It's brutal. I would love to stay home, learn to sing, become a better guitarist, learn the theory behind music, learn composition but I can't. I won't make excuses, I just can't do it. Call me cowardly, call me weak, sticks and stones may break my bones but my commerce degree will sue your ass and you'll pay for my damn medical bills.
I really admire Henry Mancini. He captured every emotion a director had in mind. Perhaps I just love film too much, and I'd be better suited to learning film. However the actuality is, I'm a student that doesn't really like what he does. A student that has too many things he'd like to do, but is apathetic to his core. No, that's too noble of a description. I'm a student that has given up.
That sure got depressing.
See You Space Cowboy.
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Two For The Road
Being like children again would be really nice.
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I can't read.
I don't remember how to read anymore. I've always wanted to imagine myself as one of those guys who sit down at a cafe, sip on caffeinated beverages and spends the rest of the day exactly like this - whilst reading a book. But fuck that.
Unless I'm reading something incredibly interesting, I will tangent off and wander around thoughts that have nothing to do with the wall of text in front of me. For example, I'll read a novel and 2 lines later, I'm thinking about how washing machines operate... IN DETAIL! Do they use gears? How come they don't make sounds? It can't be a pump system... Man, washing machines are goddamn interesting; You wouldn't understand.
It's a sad realisation of mine because the quickest way towards knowledge and skepticism is through reading a damn book. And I can't do it. Why can't i just insert a floppy drive into my mouth, twist my nipples and absorb information? I'm joking, i just wanted to say "twist my nipples" in a post.
See You Space Cowboy!
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Centigrade
People confuse me. At times they are so supportive, so extremely caring; yet the next day, they are cold-hearted and unforgiving. I hope all people are not like this. It doesn’t pain me when people do this though. I understand that they’d want to take a break from talking to certain people. It’d be suffocating otherwise. It might give the other person the wrong impression. It might show your true intentions. —- What if I want to see who you truly are? What if I want to see your plans? Aren’t these the things that bring people together? I’m not afraid of intimacy. You only alienate yourself from people when you spontaneously turn the tap hot to cold. —- I’m sorry. See You Space Cowboy.
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City Pressure
We have a guard up all the time. We don’t even notice because its become such a habit. Some people have a wall up high, some people have a wall built low. We don’t even know that we can see these walls. It’s like a power we all have, where we can feel how protective one person is; their secrets, their lies, their desires, their misfortune. I can tell when a person has their wall so high that they become a different person. Insecurities is a keyword. They have to change themselves vastly to hide the scars that reveal their shit life. What amateurs. See You Space Cowboy.
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