frogmajick

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“It’s a double album. 15 new songs.”

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Level 1: Porn with plot

Level 2: Porn with social commentary

Level 3: Porn with troubling philosophical implications

Level 4: Porn with maddening revelations of humanity’s place in the cosmos

Level 5: Porn with math

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In 2018 I was very sick. I had quit a 5 year opioid addiction cold turkey in 2017 and immediately transferred my addiction to food. But then food wasn’t working and my whole world fell apart when my family crumbled in February and I lost my home in July of 2017. Working a job I hated for a boss I detested, mourning the loss of my mother in law and first husband, I decided booze fixed me better than food.

The girl on the left on March 31, 2018- as much as I ever weighed, terribly alcoholic, diabetic, a litany of ailments. This is a party at our favorite local bar.

And then, September 1, 2019, my husband intervened and with the simple statement “I don’t want to be married to an alcoholic”. I dumped out my vodka. I took my diabetes seriously. I started eating keto and exercising. I was essential through the pandemic and the only thing I could do, the only place I could go, was walk. I walked through lockdown and saw the pounds come off.

My largest weight loss at one time was the 20lb that breast cancer took on January 6, 2022. In May I began working my dream job for a labor union. I did amazing work, met amazing people, and was happy in my work for the first time in my life.

I also met a fabulous naturopath in Spokane named Dr. Christopher Valley. I went to my first appointment with an absolute block, ready to pooh pooh all his woo and laugh about it. When I am wrong, I admit it, and I own it. I WAS SO WRONG. Chris nailed everything wholistically, and I saw myself in a way I never had. I had always asked, why this? Why this disease? Why this disease but not this comorbidity? In one visit, Chris had real, reasoned suggestions. One of which was to see a neuropsych doc named Anna. Anna verified Chris’s diagnosis, and also made sure I knew one medication I had taken religiously for 15 years was actually not for long term use (risperdal/risperidone and I heard theres a new brand name) and I needed to have a CT scan to see if I had a tumor on my pituitary that would cause a lot, including Cushing’s disease. I did not have Cushings, but I did have extremely high prolactin, which came down to normal range within 6 months of stopping the medication.

I quit smoking June 11, 2023.

As the hormones came back to normal and I began to explore somatic yoga to deal with the trauma of a lifetime of undiagnosed neurodivergence and cancer, I find myself in 2024 down 100 lbs and staying right there steady.

Yesterday I met a trainer and when she asked me my goals, I told her I’m fine with my lbs, but I want to change my shape. However I get there, goals is:

To do a dragon flag hold for at least a minute.

Her eyes got big.

I showed her a tiktok from @leekeyrouz_ doing a dragon flag hold and simply said I want to get HERE. She nodded, and we are starting from ‘walking, some yoga, and beginner with an 8lb kettlebell’.

A very wise woman once told me that the process of menopause is a second puberty where we can, as wiser women, become what we wanted to be before the world told us “women can’t do that”. Because now, past breeding, past beauty, we’ve transcended what women can and can’t do and can now do what we wanted to do all along.

#perimenopause #tw: addiction #tw: smoking #tw: weight loss #fitness journey #personal

[frogmajick]

Confessions to my bestie:

#bestiechat

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having mutuals who are really into pro wrestling is so funny because one post will be like "i cant believe Cock Puncher Daryl still has a career after he got arrested for arson" and then they reblog 8 gifsets of what looks like gay bdsm

[frogmajick]

Who makes the porn bots. Where do they come from. What do they hope to achieve.

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Apparently they're selling post content to train AI now so let us be the first to say, flu nork purple too? West motor vehicle surprise hamster much! Apple neat weed very crumgible oysters in a patagonia, my hat. Very of the and some then shall we not? Much jelly.

[frogmajick]

Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later

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Raise your hand if you have also been personally victimized by the barometric pressure changes 🥲

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My brother refuses to get Tumblr, which is a tragedy because this is the complete fucking nonsense they have sent me today alone, and I think Tumblr would appreciate them more than I do.

Edit to add poll.

[frogmajick]

“A 16th c. Scottish Plaid was Found in a Bog–Now Becomes Oldest Historical Tartan Available to Wear Today”

A textile manufacturer in Scotland has recreated the oldest-known piece of Scottish tartan ever found, which was buried for centuries.

Discovered approximately forty years ago in a peat bog, the Glen Affric Tartan underwent testing organized by The Scottish Tartans Authority last year to confirm it was the oldest surviving piece of tartan, dating back to between 1500-1600 CE.

[frogmajick]

Basically, our reaction to a walrus knocking:

Vs

A fairy knocking:

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feathered friend

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#my apartment in 1993 was 300 #today it is 1900 #my 300 a month house sold for 400k #landlords are parasites

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Can I speak my truth. I don’t think Brienne is even a little gay. I think she’s a kinsey zero who false positives on everyone’s radar. I think if you dropped brienne into new age 2024 she would get treated as a lesbian in her day to day life but whenever a woman liked her she’d be like. Ummmmmmm I’m really sorry but I don’t. Feel like that. I think she’d give lesbianism the good old college try bc of the direness of her male love life and come down firmly on the side of not attracted to women. I think she is quintessential pnw woman who you think is a slam dunk homerun lesbian based on everything about her who drops the word husband on you. I think she gets clocked on sight and mentions a partner named Jaime which makes people go. Okay. Partner i know that game. Jamie easily the name of a lesbian. Easily. And then she drops the he pronouns and you go. Well. Could still be a weird lesbian. And then Jaime is a business major in a frat with generational wealth. And HE is the kinsey five in the relationship.

[frogmajick]

Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later