ihibernateandsleep

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: I want to be with you for the rest of my life.

Hermes: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal.

Apollo, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!

Hermes: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?

Apollo: I don't know, surprise me!

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: I’m in love with you.

Apollo: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Hermes: I know.

Apollo: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

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[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: Am I going too far?

Apollo: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.

Hermes, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: Here's some advice-

Hermes: I didn't ask for any.

Apollo: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: I was arrested for being too cool.

Hermes: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: How petty can you get?

Hermes: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Apollo: What did you do?

Hermes: Nobody died.

Apollo: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: Today is a day of running through hurdles.

Apollo: Aren’t you supposed to jump OVER hurdles?

Hermes: Whatever. Fear is only something to be afraid of if you let it scare you.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: Hey Hermes can I get a sip of your water?

Hermes: It's not water.

Apollo: Vodka, I like your style!

Hermes: It's vinegar.

Apollo: Wh-Wha-

Hermes: It's vinegar, COWARD.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: Is something burning?

Hermes: Just my love for you.

Apollo: Hermes, the toaster is on fire.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: Hermes...

Hermes: Oh no, 'Hermes' in b-flat.

Hermes: You're disappointed

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Apollo, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons

Hermes:

Hermes: fsh

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Apollo: This is such a bad idea.

Hermes: Then why are you coming along?

Apollo: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died-

Apollo: Twelve, actually.

Hermes: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that?

Apollo: Yours!

Hermes: That's right: no one's.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #apollo x hermes

[ihibernateandsleep]

Hermes: Look. I may not be a saint, but it's not like I’ve killed anybody. I’m not an arsonist. I’ve never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out of state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground.

Apollo: Okay, that's really specific, and that makes me think that you definitely did do that.

#hermes #incorrect greek gods #apollo #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect quotes #The god of thiefs everyone