iwasashark

[iwasashark]

the "came back wrong" trope except like... they didnt. like this mad scientists wife died, and so he studied necromancy, brought her back, and she came back and it all worked. like she came back exactly the same as she was before with literally no difference. but the scientist guy is like "oh no... what have i done.... shes Different now!!!! she came back Wrong!!!!" and shes just like. chilling. reading a book. cooking dinner. shes just so so normal but in the guys mind hes like "oh shes soooo weird" but shes just normal

[iwasashark]

Promises - bg3 comic Astarion, Sebastian

I hope you enjoyed!

#fanart #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #sebastian #ow my heart

[iwasashark]

Tav, using their Pet Owner Voice: What have you got in your mouth? What are you eating? Drop it! Drop it right now!

Scratch: [whines and drops Wyll's boot]

Owlbear Cub: [guiltily spits out Boo, alive and unharmed]

Halsin, currently a bear: [drops a half-eaten salmon and makes an indignant noise]

Astarion: [startles at the raised voice, lets go of Tav's wrist, reclaims it and goes back to his breakfast once he realises they're not talking to him]

Gale: [chewing faster]

Tav, sternly: Gale...

Gale: [reluctantly spits out a powerful magical artefact into Tav's outstretched hand]

Tav, muttering under their breath: Can't have shit in the Gate.

Gale, ruefully rubbing the back of his neck, also under his breath: Gods forbid a wizard do anything

#bg3 #camp shenanigans #the tadfools

[iwasashark]

If you play as Shadowheart and turn to Selune and then go confront Viconia with Jaheira, Minsc, and Minthara, I feel like that should do enough psychic damage to instantly kill her

Like imagine you kidnapped a kid and raised her in a cult and took all her memories and sent her off on a mission and she somehow managed to not just turn against your religion, not just turn to the religion in direct rivalry with yours, not just defy you and turn to her own goals, not just come back and confront you over it, but she came back with two idiots you used to hang out with over 100 years ago who definitely just came here to shit talk and annoy you, and the most unimportant loser ass Baenre she can find who still has a massive superiority complex

That’s like a targeted hate campaign at this point and should kill her right there. Boo will handle the rest of them.

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #shadowheart

[iwasashark]

haven’t stopped thinking about the moment when Aylin sees Isobel again and she just makes her eyes stop glowing, tears off her helmet, dismisses her wings, takes one step, falls to her knees

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #dame aylin #isobel thorm

[iwasashark]

Shadowheart: You ever wonder about all the people we kill?

Astarion: Wonder how? Like, how they taste?

Lae'zel: I often wonder at the stupidity of the choices they made, and how those choices ended with their inevitable demise at our hands.

Shadowheart: No, I mean, do you ever wonder who they were? Did they have families and friends?

Astarion: And how they might taste...?

Lae'zel: And why their families and friends did not dissuade them from making such stupid choices?

Shadowheart: That's not...no.

Durge: Are you suggesting we kill their families and friends so they don't have to mourn their loss?

Shadowheart: You know what, this is my fault. I should have known better than to try to discuss empathy with the feral and maladjusted members of our group.

Lae'zel: I am impressed, Shadowheart.

Shadowheart: *Cautiously.* Why?

Lae'zel: Most people possess entirely too much self-respect to admit they are the problem.

----

BG3 Incorrect Quotes Masterlist

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 incorrect quotes #the tadfools

[iwasashark]

Listen I know everyone thinks Dame Aylin is a top but listen that woman is only a top if Isobel WANTS her to be a top. Dame Aylin is exactly the kind of woman that does what her lover wants. Does Isobel want her to rail her into the ground ? She’d carefully go over what Isobel wants in order to not cross a line. Does Isobel want to rail her into the ground ? She’d tie the strap on to Isobel hips herself!

Dame Aylin is going to do whatever Isobel wants and honestly I love her for it

#baldur’s gate 3 #bg3 #dame aylin #isobel thorm #yep

[iwasashark]

Bg3 characters going down on you. Ahem.

Astarion: He'll get you off faster than you've ever gotten off in your life but he's not going to enjoy himself while he's doing it. It's not you it's him. Don't take it personally.

Wyll: He's never done this before but he's just so happy to be here. Aimless as a puppy at first, but takes direction well and gets the hang of it within minutes.

Gale: Look. We all know that Mystra trained his tongue very well. But you can never be sure how much of his enthusiasm is desire for you vs desire to fulfill your expectations, and he might not know either.

Lae'zel: Would much rather you go down on her. If she does decide to use her mouth, she will take you apart with ruthless precision and leave the pieces lying on the ground.

Shadowheart: Queen of edging. Likes to watch you squirm.

Karlach: All sex is fun sex and she will go down on you enthusiastically, but if mouths are involved she'd rather be 69ing so you can both be having a good time at the same time.

Halsin: Eats you out like a starving man at a buffet.

Minthara: Her mouth is a gift that she sees fit to bestow on you. Best not to forget that.

Dame Aylin: Will make you come eight times in a row before taking a quick water break and diving back in. Sorry, I meant Isobel, not you. She'll make Isobel come eight times in a row before taking a quick water break and diving back in. The rest of you are on your own.

#bg3 #bg3 headcanons #baldur's gate 3 companions

[iwasashark]

I am once again screaming inside because at his core Halsin is a deeply PLAYFUL person!

His playful, sarcastic "I AM?!" when you say he's big for an elf! He has banters where he playfully roasts Shadowheart AND Gale at different times! He teases that you might be a lunatic for freeing a bear without knowing if it would attack you, he indulges the Drow twins by changing into a bear and letting the player ride him around, he loves bear puns (or really animal jokes in general), the way he flexes his muscles if the player mentions him moving things three grown men couldn't...

He wants to PLAY!!! The reason he's so serious for most of the story isn't because he's just the "sage wise archdruid" but because all the trauma he's faced FORCED him to be. Given the slightest bit of a chance to be himself (like traveling with a camp full of weirdos), he instantly shows his playful side, and it only comes out more in his epilogue.

He just wants to play!!

#bg3 #halsin #baldur's gate 3

[iwasashark]

Another laezel

#bg3 #laezel

[iwasashark]

I am so deeply tired of being infantilised for being asexual. I am not a child with no understand of what sex is. I don't stick my tongue out and go "yuckie!!" Like a toddler at the thought of it. is some basic respect too much to ask for

[iwasashark]

GUYS FUCKING LISTEN TO ME

DAME AYLIN X ISOBEL

LAE'ZEL X SHADOWHEART

KARLACH X SHADOWHEART

AYLIN X SHADOWHEART

DO YOU SEE MY VISION??? DO YOU SEE IT??? YOU MUST UNDERSTAND!!!

#it a good vision #bg3

[iwasashark]

friendly reminder that astarion fell for kindness. he started genuinely caring because of kindness. because the "fierce leader" of their group helped people, helped him. it wasn't power, it wasn't authority, it wasn't seduction, it wasn't a promise of revenge - it was kindness, selflessness, companionship. it felt wrong and it felt strange but that's what got him to fall in love (or the closest thing to it). his "nice, simple plan" of seduction and manipulation fell apart because someone was good, because someone protected and accepted him. i think that says a lot about him.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion

[iwasashark]

Forever rotating in my mind the Astarion dialogue you can trigger in act 2 where he says, "I don't think I want you to think of me in terms of sex. I don't know if I want anyone to."

He doesn't say anything about his own attraction as a subject, just that he doesn't want to be the object. He doesn't want people to look at him in terms of how fuckable he is or isn't. That's been his whole existence for so long that he doesn't even know what or who he is outside of it, and he can't start trying to find himself while that psychic weight is still there. The whole last two centuries have been one long performance. He needs the curtain to finally go down so he can drop the act, metaphorically slump and fart and wash his makeup off and sit on the couch watching trash tv and eating ice cream with no one watching, not even people he likes. And the way he says it, like he's coming to the realization as he's talking, makes you realize just how much he was performing before... for the player, who he cares for quite a bit, but even for himself. I just think this bit of dialogue is so important to his characterization and provides more understanding into his psyche than almost anything else. I really love it.

#bg3 #astarion #baldur's gate 3

[iwasashark]

Where there’s a hole…

Lazy mornings at elfsong tavern…

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #astarion #karlach #hellspawn #bg3 fanart

[iwasashark]

"It's only-"

#bg3 #wyllstarion #astarion #wyll ravengard #comic #i am crying #baldurs gate 3

[iwasashark]

Wheeping of a bhaalspawn - bg3 comic original Dark Urge Tav

yay, it's finished!

I really had fun thinking about a story for a dark urge tav, it was exciting to figure out how I could combine all those different ideas and hints the game gives you and put them into a new character! I really hope you enjoyed it!

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #comic #dark urge