jaysplaceinoakcliff

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Ufology

I went down the UFO rabbit hole and was shocked at some of the stuff I learned.

I never really gave a hoot about the subject other than I was fascinated by the hypothetical physics of the subject.

When I moved in with Dad, he called to me and asked me what I was doing in the office. I was watching Joe Rogan interview Commander David Fraver (the pilot who chased the Tic Tac UFO). I asked Dad if he wanted to see it, so I pulled up YouTube on the TV and we watched the interview.

My father was shocked and speechless. He later told me about seeing one himself, and that he never told anyone about it because they would think he was crazy, could never be trusted, probably lose his career.

I feel so sorry for the people who have seen something and they can't ever discuss it.

A few months after Dad passed, I asked Mom if he ever told her about seeing a UFO. He had not, but she related to me in detail about her encounter.

I'm shocked and don't really know how to process the information. Part of me thinks her story was BS, but she has never lied to me.

I begin to explore the subject of what is called ufology. UFOs fly around, and I have heard about the Greys. That's about all I knew at the time.

It turns out that she described something a lot of people have seen. The craft and the creatures.

I don't recommend anyone go down the UFO rabbit hole. Let me save you the time and give you the summary. Five people whom I think are most knowledgeable about the subject (scientists) think the things are demonic. None of them think they come from another solar system. Three of those five people, I don't know if they are Christian. I assumed they were/are atheists.

Because of that reason, I dropped the subject. I don't play with the Occult. I've met a witch, and homie don't play that.

Then, I went back to the Bible. These things appear to be discussed in both the Old and New Testaments. Once you see it, it is difficult to un-see. It will literally change the meaning of the text you may have read a dozen times.

Unfortunately, I think a huge portion of the population of the world will fall prey to the Antichrist. The foundation appears to be laid. I've read the arguments. The Antichrist may present himself as an alien. It sounds bizarre, but it checks a lot of boxes. Make sure your faith is strong, because it will be tested and challenged.

The good news is that Jesus told us directly how to identify the Antichrist.

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

The Stephenville UFO

In January 2008, a UFO appeared in Erath County, Texas. It was seen by hundreds of people. I used to live in that area. I knew those people. They are good people. They may live in the country, but they are wise to the ways of the world. They know what an airplane is and is not.

Our government freaking lied to our faces about the incident. I feel so sorry for the people who have seen things they can't explain and are told by the government that they are idiots.

Ten years later, the US Navy finally admitted that UFOs are real, they don't know what they are, nor where they come from.

#ufos #ufology

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

No Trumpers???

Dating profiles are so funny. If any ladies want my advice, I can help you out a lot.

One of the things I see fairly often is something along the lines of "No Trumpers." Ladies, get off the freaking dating apps. You are shouting to the world that you want a beta male. Here is the sad truth - you hate beta males. You are going to get a fur baby and die alone.

Men are smarter than that. We don't care if you are our intellectual equals. We have male friends for that. We don't care if you make as much money as us - you probably make more. We don't care. Just live and let live.

I met a woman whom I REALLY liked. She voted for Biden. I didn't care. You should never expect a male to be on Team Biden after the clusterf#ck we have just witnessed.

Look, I gave money to Vivek Ramaswamy and RFK Jr. The fact is we have a two-party system. It will come down to Trump or Biden. Men who love their children don't want them to go to a war in a part of the world they will never visit.

Women, when you say things like "No Trumpers," you are shouting to men that you sort of hate your sons, because they are the ones who will have to fight future wars that may arise.

Over the last four years, I have learned to never tell lies. We are lied to constantly. Driving back from a rocket launch with my daughter, I told her, "You will be taught a lot of nonsense. You will be lied to by the media and your teachers. But I will never lie to you. I am the one person in the world whom you can depend upon to tell you the truth."

Ladies, please respect the men who love your sons more than you do. I know you have never heard this before. Most men will never tell you the truth. You hate your sons. You treat them like defective girls. I don't want my daughter to marry your future f#cked-up male child. I am DEEPLY concerned about the future we leave our children. "No Trumpers" are selfish f#ucking bitches who hate your sons.

When my Dad's time came, I moved in with him and took care of him until his death. We didn't always get along. I went years without speaking to him. But I always respected him. He never wanted me to go to war, but he made sure to take me to register for selective service when I turned 17. We have not had a draft in a long time, but he respected my decision to enlist.

Ladies, please think twice about what you really think about your sons. Do you really love them? Will you do almost anything to protect them? Are you willing to consider having someone in your life who really does want to protect and serve and be a good role model?

No, because you are a stupid, selfish b!tch, and we know it. Your daughters will be just fine, but I am concerned for your sons.

#dating #women #dating advice

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

They/Them

Dating in the 2020's is sooooo freaking weird. I got married a long time ago. Today, the rules are completely different.

I met something called a They/Them. I was completely confused. The rules of English don't work anymore. The rules of physics don't work anymore because the US Navy and NASA say that UFOs are real, but Roswell is still bullshit. And, this chick doesn't know if she is a boy or a girl. I knew full well she was female because I like tits and ass.

I don't believe in aliens. I do believe UFOs exist. I highly question Bigfoot. But, one thing I know is that there is a HUGE problem with mental illness among some women. The bigger problem is that I don't think we have a system that can actually help these people. It is as though we feed their neurosis.

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Must...Find...Pants

Darth, my apprentice, had a milestone birthday. Accordingly, he planned an epic party. Everyone was invited. I should have known it would be out of control by the people who were not there. Upon entering the party, the core four were me, Darth, Smitty and DoctorOfFun. Of course, there was another hundred of Darth's friends I did not know.

Darth encouraged me to bring a date, so I did. I'm driving, so I am not drinking. At some point, relatively early, my friends encourage me to take my date home. My friends were sort of, "She's cute, but she doesn't bring anything to the party." I agreed. On the way home, she had me take a detour to a sketch part of east Dallas where she purchased cocaine. I don't do drugs. I don't like that part of town. And, that was the last time I ever saw that TriDelt. I have never broken up with a girl that fast and that easily. I have never crossed paths with her again. I hope she is doing well.

I return to the party about 11 pm. Of course, I have to tell my buds about that crazy incident. We like to have fun, but there are certain things that can land you in jail, and we don't cross that line.

Darth and Smitty are both part-time bartenders at Morton's. Darth informs me that I ain't going anywhere, and he starts making cocktails.

I have no recollection of what happened after that. Apparently, I don't hold my liquor very well. My assumption is that we had a freaking blast. However, upon waking up the next morning, I discovered that my pants are missing. Well, that's freaking odd.

Darth rolls into the kitchen. "Had a good time last night, did ya?" He's from Wisconsin and has those ways of speaking sometimes. He didn't know what happened. He reported he went to bed somewhere around 3 or 4 am, and we were still partying.

Smitty wakes up. I asked him what happened. He refused to tell me as he figured out this would be the ultimate inside joke that he can hold over me for the rest of my damn life.

The blog gets published. TriDelt is no longer a character. ImageConsultant says, "That's what you get for dating a SMU co-ed, dumbass." She hated TriDelt. BigSis was more sympathetic as she knows I have never been exposed to that side of life.

My dating screening process needs to be revised. I get to work on that.

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Murphy was the new alias of BigSis. She chose BigSis, but I chose Murphy. BigSis sounded a little too incestuous. Years later, her husband would ask, "Why does he call you Murphy?" "Because, if anything can go wrong...." you get the picture.

Facebook was brand new. I created an account because Murphy suggested it. One evening, she checks on my Facebook account, and sees a friend request from an attractive female. She beat the snot out of me. I literally ran out of her house while she was beating the hell out of me. Her neighbors apparently called the police. I ran around the corner and walked down the street to a convenience store where I could call the police so that I could get my car keys and billfold back.

The police SUV finally arrives after quite a long time. They are giving me the drunk test, asking a lot of questions, all that jazz. I explained that I have no complaint, I'm not injured, I am not pressing charges, I just want my car keys and billfold back, and I will return to Dallas. Police: "Mr. C, do you want to explain why your car is parked in the middle of the road on fire?" Huh!?! Popo points in the direction of Murphy's place and says, "Look."

My friends know me well enough when they ask me about my weekend or whatever, they sometimes ask first, "Does it involve DOMR?" (our mutual friend and my attorney). If it does, they know the story will be hysterical.

God bless Murphy. I loved her dearly despite our challenges. I have no doubt that when I die, arrive at the Pearly Gates, she will be standing there, tapping her wristwatch, saying, "It took you long enough, asshole."

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

The Barbie Situation, Part 1

BigSis wanted to meet her Mr. Right. She self-selected herself from my dating orbit. So, I invited her to my Lodge's quarterly social so she can meet a bunch of quality, single men. My buddies and I always have a great time. I had no idea how epic it would be.

BigSis meets me at Houston's Steakhouse where we will grab a drink and go to my Lodge's social at Javier's in park cities. Upon seeing her, I can't believe I screwed things up with her before our first date. Whatever.

I brief her on what to expect tonight. She is dying to meet Number One, Spader, DOMR and DoctorOfFun.

We had a private dining room. Dinner was uneventful. BigSis was having a ball meeting the actual characters from my blog. My buds know the back story to my blogs because they were there. They took significant pleasure embarrassing me. One of my catch phrases was, "The truth is stranger than fiction" and "I'm not creative enough to make this stuff up." BigSis now understands some of it.

After dinner, we retire to the cigar lounge. Hilarity will ensue in Ten...Nine...Eight (When your attorney pulls you to the side and says, "If somebody is going to jail tonight, you have my number if you need it.") Seven...Six...Five... I have to diffuse the situation.

I grab BigSis's hand and pull her close to me so I could whisper to her. "You see the rather attractive brunette in the corner? That is Barbie." BigSis: "The woman you ghosted two weeks ago!!!!", she said rather loudly. My friends were like, Dear God, this is going to be good!

Four...Three... "Excuse me", I say to BigSis, as I go to address Barbie.

#dating #dating advice

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

When BigSis Died

I sometimes wonder if God is proving a point to me. I have lost so many people. I will never forget learning when BigSis died.

I am done with freaking eulogies. I have done enough of them. I have about three left in me: my daughter, my wife, and my mother-in-law.

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

The Number 5

I am okay with the number 5 provided it is preceded by the number 9.

This is not the case with my daughter.

If you think my hot AF wife married me for my looks or money, you are sorely mistaken. I am, also, intelligent. So is she. I have criteria as well. Stupid chicks aren't allowed on Team Jay. Together, my daughter should be kinda smart. Granted, I am dyslexic. I have learned to deal with it and overcome it. My mother was dyslexic, so am I, and my daughter has it as well. That is just stuff we deal with. We can't change our skin color or sex. Chicks can change their hair color. Dudes just have to be good all the freaking time. There is no excuse for bad grades at age nine.

I have read one of my daughter's test questions, had no idea how to answer it, I have a degree in Economics from a top 20 school, and I didn't understand the question.

I get a call from my wife's boyfriend who informed me that the

number was actually 37.

I cannot comprehend the thought.

I want to see the test.

This summer is going to be hell for my daughter.

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Where to Find Good Men

This is the question I was asked ALL THE FREAKING TIME. I quit answering the question because the answer was obvious.

The men in the blog were Masons. We would meet for business every Thursday evening (still happening) and go out socially afterwards. Every quarter, we had a public social where our ladies were allowed to attend. We also had an annual banquet which was far more subdued than our quarterly socials because the big wigs and grand pubas were invited.

Our monthly meetings were formal. We would wear tuxedos. There was only so much one could do with a tuxedo. You can change the jacket (depending upon the circumstance), you can change a tie, vest, cummerbund or cuff links, but not much else.

If you are from Hinge, the photo of me in my tux is typical monthly Thursday night attire. Being single in 2024, I don't have a clue how to dress anymore. This ultra-casual thing is sort of weird. I need a new ImageConsultant.

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Meeting BigSis

FINALLY, BigSis agreed to meet yours truly. I plan something a little light, fun, during the daytime, no pressure. She already knows much about me, that I am real, have numerous professional licenses, no STDs (hysterical blog about that), no criminal record and she will be HIGHLY entertained. At the same time, she is smart enough not to let me pick her up at her place. That is a VERY wise move for you ladies!

We meet at Sundance Square in Fort Worth. Upon seeing BigSis, I was shocked. I didn't consider BigSis attractive in her dating profile. However, in person, I fell hard. I became a damn puppy dog instead of the big, bad wolf she was expecting. I am surprised that I could put two words together much less a complete thought. This took me some time to process.

I believe my first words spoken to her were, "Okay. I'm impressed. You will fit right in with the dating scene. I mean, we seriously need to update your photos." At this time, I was still her dating coach and friend.

We had a great time walking from establishment to establishment have a beer here, a martini there, and having a late lunch.

Now that I find her to be more compelling than Barbie, it is GAME ON and she has zero chance. Neither do I. The King met his Queen. Neither of us realized it. But, ImageConsultant had a hunch.

IC called me during our date. BigSis saw the number on my phone. "Is that THE ImageConsultant? Take the call. I'm dying to talk to her."

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

BigSis

If you arrived at this blog from Hinge, the blonde in the picture is BigSis. She was a former blog reader who stepped into ImageConsultant's position after our falling out.

She was a transplant from North Carolina and wanted to get back on the dating scene. She messaged me on Match.com. She was an attractive woman, but God she needed some help. I revised her dating profile and had some tips for her (I was a dating coach at the time). Specifically, "Go see ImageConsultant" (we were still friends at the time). BigSis is a former model, hot AF (I had no clue at the time) and looked like a total mom in her pictures. That look would not work in the ultra-trendy dating scene of Dallas, TX.

We became friends over email. She thought the blog was hysterical. Several times I suggested we meet. She was completely intimidated and didn't know what to think of me.

Eventually, we did meet. But, it was a long process. I was looking for the future Mrs. C, and she had already ruled herself out. So, I was more than happy to help her find Mr. Right. Our friendship developed over a long period of time. I thought she was funnier than me. We were instant online friends. That is why she named herself my Big Sister.

BigSis makes her first appearance in my blog. The blog readers were like, "Oh sh*t! We have a new character. And with a name like BigSis, she has to be close to him, but it's platonic or something." The readers were correct. She could match me wit-for-wit. Our email exchanges were legendary. Some exchanges became their own blogs. I had never met a woman like her and never expect to again.

I made a hard press to meet this mysterious woman. BigSis wrote to me, "First, I would never date a younger man. Second, there is no way I would ever want anyone like you. Third, having read your blogs, I know exactly how your game works, and it would never work on me. And forth, okay, we can be friends (although I don't know whether to ROFL or run like hell!)." With the aforementioned Item 3, you're just teasing me. This is going to be SOOOO freaking fun! There was just one problem - Barbie.

I had just been on my second date with Barbie whom I adored (This is not hyperbole. I damn near married Barbie). Barbie may have been the hottest woman I had ever dated. (Barbie is the brunette if you are coming from Hinge). After our second date, Barbie wrote something along the line of, "Before our next date, you should know that I am ready to settle down and get married. You need to think about that before meeting again." I'm thinking, not a chance after our second date. That was a little out of left field and freaked me out. Barbie is now on standby. Merman has to cool things down quite a bit.

BigSis was unaware that Barbie was on hold when she agreed to meet me. It is game over, and she doesn't even have a clue. Even I was unaware of how epic this was going to be.

[In case anyone is wondering, BigSis and my wife became besties. BigSis married shortly after I did. but has since passed away. Barbie found her a husband, and we would still friends today, but, according to Facebook, she died recently. Believe it or not, BigSis and Barbie became friends, too. I am a quality man who dates quality women. If we can't all be friends, that is not a good date. Just sayin']

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Seeking Image Consultant

The first step in dating is to understand your weaknesses. I was fat (270 lbs). I lost weight over a period of many months. I got down to 185 lbs. One of my friends told me, "Jay, you look like shit. You need to put some weight back on." I went back up to 210 (I'm 6'1") and my friends told me that was a good weight for me.

Next, realizing I had ZERO game, I hired a dating coach. There is a LONG story here but suffice it to say that I ultimately became a pick-up artist. My friends LOVED me! DoctorOfFun and I even made it into the Dallas Morning News. My Mom (some freaking how???) read the article and had some choice words for yours truly (since when does my mother EVER read the Dallas Morning News???).

The next thing to fix was my style. I was not naturally gifted with a sense of style, so I needed help. I turned to CraigsList (it was a thing back in the day). A woman (hair stylist) responded. I think her sentiment was, "Dear Jay, you need some help, desperately." She would become my stylist, best female friend, my confidant, and one of my blogs primary characters - ImageConsultant or IC.

A book came out about that time by Neil Strauss called The Game. ImageConsultant started reading it. I will never forget her calling me and telling me about that book. She said, "You're just like those guys! Are YOU one of THOSE guys!?!" I was not one of those guys, but we were in the same club. My alias was Merman.

The guys in the book and I were not the same. They were about getting women's phone numbers. I wanted to find a wife. We were members of the same club but headed in two different directions. I will never forget IC's command, "Use your power for good; not for evil."

Do I need an ImageConsultant today? Probably. I will accept applications. Someday I will find a new ImageConsultant. Women like shopping, and I know a gay guy or two.

What happened to IC? She fell for the wrong man (Merman). I wrote a funny blog, but unintentionally used a name in it that happened to be the name of her deceased former love (THE love of her life who died). It was completely unintentional. Of course, I tried to patch things up with IC, but it was not possible. Enter BigSis.

#dating #dating advice

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Purpose of the Blog

Many years ago when I was originally on the dating scene, I had a HORRIBLE date. I decided to make sure I would NEVER have that experience again.

My idea was to create a blog and cause potential dates to read it to determine if they could handle my sense of humor. If they could, then I knew we would have a GREAT time whether or not we were a match.

It worked! I met a lot of great people and many of us are still friends to this day.

My former blog turned into Misadventures in Dating. Yeah, I had some interesting experiences. Most of the people who followed me were women, but I was writing for my male friends: most of whom were more offended by their aliases - specifically, DOMR, Darth and Spader. The women thought my stories were hilarious. My guy friends were more, "Good God, Jay! Where do you find these women!?! You are the reason we are single and happy about it!" Happy to help. I even became a dating coach for women.

[In case anyone is concerned, I won't be writing about my dating experiences this time around. However, I might tell a few of my past stories just to see if our personalities will play well together.]

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

How I Landed in Oak Cliff

I grew up in Stevens Park. My family moved to Preston Hollow when I entered Jesuit.

A few years ago, my father became very ill and I ultimately moved in with him. Every week, I would return to Carrollton to visit my daughter for a few hours.

One evening, I guess I spent a little too much time with my daughter, I received a call from the Fire Marshall who told me he was taking Dad to Methodist Hospital (When your Dad is the mayor, you don't call 911. You literally have the direct dial number for the Fire Marshall). Dad had become too ill for me to take an evening off to visit with my daughter, so that was the last time I saw her until his funeral.

Dad died on my daughter's 6th birthday. It took me a little while to get things sort of in order. There were a lot of details. I was not ready.

During that year, my wife had moved on with her life. That was interesting to learn. I simply stayed in my Dad's home. I guess it was the option with the least effort. Besides, most of my rental properties are in this neighborhood.

This isn't where I would choose to live (my former primary residence is in Carrollton), but my daughter likes it here. She has some friends, and I think being here reminds her of Grandpa. So, I rented out my condominium and stayed in OC.

#dating

[jaysplaceinoakcliff]

Dating Site Subscriptions

I haven't been on a dating site in quite a while, so I thought I would give it a try. On something called "Hinge" there is a subscription plan for 1 week for $16.99. That is either darned optimistic or they are charging $17 for someone to login long enough to contact someone they forgot.

#dating #dating advice