jewish-lesbian-princess

[jewish-lesbian-princess]

A little bit about my FUNemployment and how long it takes me to draw!!

Since Covid started, I have had two periods of time that I was FUNemployed. I am currently waiting for my new job to start, so I’m trying to entertain myself. I literally have nothing to do if I am not working because I graduated and I am an #adult now. I refuse to do anything extremely productive and prefer to keep only moderate productivity. Sarah works two jobs, so obviously I spend all day doing laundry and dishes (I have a washer, a dryer, and a dishwasher inside my apartment but it’s a lot for me okay?! don’t judge). Last time I was between jobs #FUcovid my dad suggested I learn a second language (3rd technically if you count that I can kinda read Hebrew but I don’t know what any of it means). Instead, I taught myself card tricks that I now remember none of. I’m about to go off on a tangent everyone get ready!!! I am very well aware nobody will read this crap (idk if I can curse on Tumblr so I have been avoiding bad words). In Hebrew School we spent six years learned just enough for our Bar/Bat Mitzvahs. We were able to go up there and read the letters, but we spent only about 1% of those 6 years learning to actually speak/understand the language! Probably about 1% of our time was dedicated to learning about Israel. Thankfully I will be going on Birthright in Dec/Jan and I will finally learn about the country the right way. We mostly spent our time learning to read the language and about holidays. Tangent #1 over. Tangent #2: I took Spanish consistently from 6th-10th or 11th grade (can’t remember)  and all throughout my first 5 semesters of college. I took ASL my junior and senior year of high school. As a 25-year-old, I do not know either language AT ALL. Anyway, back to the topic: all of my free time. One day I accidentally slept until 3pm. I have been rewatching a bunch of good stuff like Broad City, Friends, Inside Amy Schumer, Bob’s Burgers, Rick and Morty, etc. I also watched half of the first season of Trinkets, because one of the girls was in Deadpool and I think she’s cute af and gaaaaaayyy. Anyway, the show was awful but also so good at the same time. I have watched so many romcoms I MADE A LIST. I’ve been drawing, which I am not at all good at. I press so hard with the colored pencils that you can see little white rips in the colors. Anyway, I will attach pics. The one on the right side was drawn yesterday and the one on the left was today. Each one took THREE HOURS because I don’t know how to draw. I attached a conversation with my sister and I will now write the list of movies I have watched since leaving my job.

Iron man, Iron man 2, Ant man, Ant man 2, both Tom Holland Spidermans, both Andrew Garfield Spidermans, all 3 Tobey Maguire Spiderman Into the spider verse, Deadpool , Deadpool 2, Horrible Bosses, Horrible Bosses 2, Office Christmas party, Tammy, The Heat, Spy, Smiley face, Just Go With It, The Break-up, Ted, a bunch of random documentaries so I would feel smarter, I think I watched something after Ted and I can’t remember!!!

Xoxo,

Sarah

I don’t need to sign these nobody will read it anyway! I won’t even read it before I hit post because it’s obviously so so so embarrassing and I hope nobody reads these lol ok bye future me!!!! <333333 Gtg the dog is whining because she wants the eggs I made ttyl!!!!

#iamsobored

[jewish-lesbian-princess]

An open letter to Hulu

To the service that used to be one of my favorite aps on my Firestick,

I am currently watching Broad City, a hilarious show that I love so so much. Although I do not pay for the no ad subscription because I am #poor, why do they keep playing the same horror movie commercial? Obviously I am stoned, as one is when they watch Broad City, and the scary music is freaking me the fuck out. I love the vagina commercial featuring Annie Murphy on an electric scooter. Hulu, I want more dog food ads with nice puppies to look at. I also like the Seinfeld commercial. Thank you for your time.

Love Always and Forever,

Sarah Garten

#Broadcity #seinfeld #ilovedogs #puppiesrock #poor #scared #sad #schitts creek #annie murphy

[jewish-lesbian-princess]

My First Post

I was going to write a book of all my dumb thoughts and opinions, but I decided it would be more fun for me to write a blog. I know nobody will read this shit, but maybe one day I will look back and laugh at how poorly my degree in Communications (concentration in English) paid off. I literally took a class on blog creating called “Writing for Electronic Media.”

Anyway, this is my cute lil intro:

Lover of my senior dog, my senior cat, T-Swizzle, the gays™, Bob Burger, iced PSLs, Mimi Kanassis, Blue Moon, the devil’s lettuce (don’t tell anyone), and my mom. Paul McCartney was definitely the walrus, Ross Geller was the worst character on the show (including Gunther), and Severus Snape was a grown man that bullied a little boy. Here is a video I enjoy very much: https://youtu.be/KsiqCAL-9SU