leonornaves

[leonornaves]

An open love and appreciation letter-post to Taylor Swift:

i know no one is probably going to see this, let alone taylor swift herself, but to be honest i needed you to know the great deal in which taylor has mpacted my life. so here it goes...

dear taylor swift,

your music has impacted me in ways i have never thought someone could.

besides the typical 'shake it off' and 'blank space' discovery in like 2015 i really didn't know much about you and your music. that is until i was 12. when i was 12 years old (around 2018) my dad was diagnosed with leukemia and i found myself numb, really numb. up until that point, i had never had any big issues with my parents... i was happy.

so you can imagine my shock to have my world turned. with that numbness came a necessity to hear/read words from someone who was exactly in the same head space as me, a child of a parent who had a life threatening disease but i could find words that made me feel.

honestly i don't think i was really looking because i didn't want to feel, i didn't want to think about my dad being the same weight as me or the fact that my mom and i were so close to losing him that she started "getting me ready for the worst".

that was until late 2019 almost 2020, when i (re)discovered you taylor. i was suddenly sucked into obssessing over one of the best lyricis and songwriter of my generation. obssesed with analyzing and re analyzing your lyrics and finding more hidden meanings on them (although that came more with folklore and evermore).

your song 'soon you'll get better' (ft. the chicks) is in my opinion your saddest one ever. of course atw and other songs like marjorie and many, many songs are incredibly sad but there is something about the rawness in your voice even when i listening to it that alwyas makes me cry even now!! singing it was not a talented 30 year old famous lady with 2 cats (soon to be 3) and hundreds of awards but a girl, girl so afraid to lose her mother to a horrible and terrifying cancer and what exactly it would entail in her life.

that song, those lyrics... were exactly the words i needed to hear. after that i started to myself feel and take the time to be with my dad who was so close to death that i was starting to wonder what life without him would be like. so close that i, at the time 12, was starting to feel jealous of all the people who got to spend time with my dad because that was time i would never have with him.

during the pandemic, he got so much better and i know how lucky i am to be able to say that. i hope your mom got better too. thank you for making me feel! im now 17, and terified of what i would've been like if i hadn't really taken time with my dad during those days when it felt like the end and he had died. i wouldn't have felt anything. would i still be numb? i don't know. thank you for that.

nowadays my problems are different, i have so many fights with my mom it's toxic at this point, and after those all i want to do is put on my folklore cd and cry. cry for all the bad words said between us. cry for allthat i could be experiencing if my mom would let me grow up. cry for my teenage years. cry for everything.

honestly, i think this letter has become sort of messy. but in the end i hope you, taylor swift, know how much your appreciated and how much your music has saved my from my own life and thoughts. thank you so much for writing something that trully makes me feel like you're there for me, even if a thousands miles away and on tour.

also thank you for finally coming to my country!! my godfather got me tickets ( he survived the great war lol) and i will be on the pit bawling my eyes out to every song, yes even the happy ones, beacuse i just can't believe i will be in the same space as you. thank you for saving me!!

this is super cringy and im crying so much while writing this.

thank you again, love from a forever and always fan <3

@taylorswift @taylornation

[leonornaves]

finding out that your bestfriend doesn't think of you as a bestfriend is one of the saddest feelings ever

[leonornaves]

adding it to my must-see list!!

The Lady of the Camellias (1981) | dir. Mauro Bolognini

[leonornaves]

SUCH A SERVE

mariella burani | fall 2002

[leonornaves]

ITS SO PRETTY

Views from Mountain Hostel, Gimmelwald, Switzerland. ( via )

[leonornaves]

i have to do a book report. I FUCKING CHOOSE 'SEVEN HUSBANDS OF EVELYN HUGO'!!!

my teachers face, after she sees the fan art i choose: 🧐🤨😲😐😑😤

[leonornaves]

going to start to be more active on tumblr

[leonornaves]

[leonornaves]

Tsutsuji Matsuri, Nagakushiyama Park | Taro Matsumura

[leonornaves]

Jack and Ava from the [Everything Has Changed video]. 

lewisbros3: It was so fun to see @avaames today. A reunion 5 years in the making. @taylorswift and @teddysphotos we should do a new video together 😜. [x] 

avaames: @lewisbros3 😁 [x]

[leonornaves]

[leonornaves]

I’ll also be doing music if there’s time after theirs...

[leonornaves]

100% agreed!!! when we heard of the casting choice we (well me at least) ran to google to see sadie's age... and the age difference between her and dylan. and it's slightly nerve-wracking that the casting choice for 'all too well: the short film' had so many turning heads but the relationship between a 19/20 year old taylor and a grown ass 30 year old man was "fine". i cried so much during the kitchen scene especially because having pretty strict parents i feel my opinions and feelings are never fully validated, and that's what i think 'her' (sadie's character) was feeling... like she was fucking stupid and not worthy of feeling sad or angry or annoyed at the fact he dropped her hand and didn't even pay attention to her when they were having dinner with his friends that she had previously met before. anyways... stream red tv and love you taylor for keeping our minds sharp and love u my fellow swifities for paying attention and informing the rest of us about stuff u find.

ps. if u see this somehow... please comment your opinion. i love hearing different povs and even if u agree i would love to know :)

the queasy feeling when dylan and sadie start to kiss.... the growing panic when you realize they’re fully making out... that’s exactly how people should have reacted to seeing jake and taylor. people either ignored this gut feeling or completely didn’t have it, and that’s a problem. how blatantly the film cuts to the chase and doesnt beat around the bush isn’t just a perfect demonstration of how taylor is committed to allowing herself to fully present and process what she really went through, but of how committed she is to using her art to prevent other young women and vulnerable people from finding themselves in similar situations, whether it’s from their own heightened awareness or the awareness of people around them who can step in if need be

#all too well short film #red tv #dylan o'brien #sadie sink #red taylor’s version #all too well ten minute version #taylor swift

[leonornaves]

urban dictionary defines 'gaslighting' as:

"A form of intimidation or psychological abuse, sometimes called Ambient Abuse where false information is presented to the victim, making them doubt their own memory, perception and quite often, their sanity. The classic example of gaslighting is to switch something around on someone that you know they're sure to notice, but then deny knowing anything about it, and to explain that they "must be imagining things" when they challenge these changes.

A more psychological definition of gaslighting is "an increasing frequency of systematically withholding factual information from, and/or providing false information to, the victim - having the gradual effect of making them anxious, confused, and less able to trust their own memory and perception."

(https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Gaslighting)

and j completely agree with this person... J was a gaslighter and T was a victim and a child.

The fact that even in the original album and the "normal" 'all too well' taylor repeats over and over again "i remember it all too well" comes to prove what dylan's character showed us on 'all too well the short film' that he doesn't remeber dropping her hand and completely ignoring sadie's character but T "remebers it all too well".

The fact is that every gaslighter ever says "you're misremembering things" or "you remember things that never happened" or "you remember things wrong." Now that we saw the ATW short film and know that, yes, the J/T relationship involves a lot of gaslighting, the phrase "I remember it all too well" hits SUPER hard in a place that I didn't even know I could be sucker-punched. I'm in awe. Mad respect for you Taylor. Thanks for showing us what the song was really about 10 years later.

#all too well #red taylor’s version #taylor swift #sadie sink #dylan o'brien #all too well ten minute version #all too well short film #Spotify

[leonornaves]

then you wondered where it went to as i reached for you but all i felt was shame.

[leonornaves]

“love is so short, forgetting is so long.” —pablo neruda

[leonornaves]

It’s been one year since we escaped the real world together and imagined ourselves someplace simpler. With tall tall trees and salt air. Where you’re allowed to wear lace nightgowns that make you look like a Victorian ghost every day & no one will side eye you cause no one is around. It’s just you and your imaginary cabin and the stories you make up to pass the time. To say thank you for all you have done to make this album what it was, I wanted to give you the original version of The Lakes. Happy 1 year anniversary to Rebekah, Betty, Inez, James, Augustine, and the lives we all created around them. Happy Anniversary, folklore. 🌿

https://taylor.lnk.to/thelakesoriginal