lifeofdc

[lifeofdc]

@antrunner 's bbg poll is canon TO ME

[lifeofdc]

Battinson going toe-to-toe with Harley Quinn, but every time he fights her, she diagnoses him with another mental illness

—

Battinson: *monologuing to himself about the constant nightmares*

Harley, appearing from nowhere with a baseball bat: Sounds like PTSD :/ Are you okay, hon?

—

Harley, swinging from the chandelier of a bank she’s robbing: Ya know, I’ve been thinkin’! Have you ever been screened for autism?

Battinson: Wut

Harley: Oh, nothing! Just take it into consideration!

—

Harley, mid-arrest: I’m licensed to diagnose anxiety and depression! If you’d like an appointment, my door’s always open :D

Battinson: Please just get in the car

[lifeofdc]

It probably says a lot about me that the first Saturday after finals are done, I've spent the entire day at home alternating between rewatching Gotham and cleaning instead of going out and doing something

#b talks #gotham #college #im almost halfway done with season 2 woot

[lifeofdc]

Every Batman Unburied episode with Riddler is basically this

#listening to this while at work this past week #fifjdkdkfjsi so true

[lifeofdc]

Talia put her little boy in a Batman costume

[lifeofdc]

[lifeofdc]

i officially love robin....

[lifeofdc]

Do you think Dick ever looked at Damian and went, "Ah, to be young and filled with rage and bloodlust."

[lifeofdc]

What if Janet went into Labor with Tim during a Wayne gala and Bruce helped deliver him, but Bruce didn’t realize Tim was the same baby

Until a random stakeout/confrontation with a villain/league meeting, he remembers suddenly and just straight up goes

“I birthed you”

He then starts to think back to all the other women he helped and like...

– Teenage Bruce stopping in the middle of his day to help Mary Grayson call the hospital when her water breaks in public

– His first test of people skills as Batman is looking after Sandra Wu-San, not knowing she'd become Lady Shiva

– A short while later Batman does the same for Sheila Haywood because Willis didn't bother to show up

– Arthur Brown being too absorbed in his scandals and early scheming to be present so Batman swoops in for Crystal

– Then Janet Drake going into labor at a Wayne gala and Bruce helping her through that

– Couple years later, Batman keeping Elaine Thomas company in the twilight hours

– He stops to help Talia amidst a dangerous battle, not knowing the baby is his and her maintaining the secret

– He gets sidetracked on a time travel mission and assists a stranger, not realizing it's Mary Pennyworth

[lifeofdc]

Headcanon where after so many arguments between the batkids and Bruce over his paranoia and complete disregard for his kids privacy, the entire family had compromised with (in the healthiest way possible) downloading life360 on their phones and that's how they all keep track of each other.

Now Bruce knew that this is mostly for his benefit and is supposed to be a healthy alternative for his unhealthy paranoia and helicopter parenting, but what he wasn't expecting was for his kids to start keeping track of him.

He's putting gas in his car and Dick calls him because apparently Dick has been watching him drive around on the app? And Bruce is currently at a gas station thats right around the corner from a Taco Bell and now Dick wants him to get food for everyone since he's already there.

He's driving home from a meeting and Steph calls him because her and Duke were shopping in the area and wants to know if he can pick them up, when he asks how she knew he was on the same street, he gets a "Oh I just like to stalk everyone on the app for funsies." as an answer.

Jason calls him and he can barely get out a hello before Jason cuts him off, "Bruce why the fuck is your phone battery on 5%, charge your damn phone" which completely stuns him because why does he know that. He clears his throat before answering. "Jason, what?"

"Everyone can see each others phone batteries on '360, now charge your phone." Is all he gets before Jason hangs up on him.

#loll my family has life360 #and sometimes I'll get notifications of my mom labeling a place im at #100% the batkids would do that with bruce #and also naming them the funniest things possible

[lifeofdc]

Secret Robin au

Jason's having a great time at "college"

Prev / Commission info / ko-fi

#lolll #at my college they're called swell classes #for student wellness #and there's a variety of sports and levels you can do #even stuff like zumba and meditation and stationary cycling #i dont think we have fencing tho. we may be D1 but we're not That Bougie

[lifeofdc]

SHE IS THE FUNNIEST PERSON EVER OMG

Crystal: Since when have you started watching crime shows? Steph: How else am I ever gonna see dad? Sorry, mom. Bad joke.

[lifeofdc]

Hey don't cry. Batman's cape gets longer to swaddle his adult kids

#batman and his giant cape

[lifeofdc]

messy sketch on the phone because it was the only thing I could draw on😞 I haven't drawn on my phone for a long time, so you can see a lot of mistakes here BUT I DON'T CARE guys I enjoyed the process.

[lifeofdc]

#TINY BLOB DAMIAN AHHH #i love him

[lifeofdc]

tim showing duke around the cave for the first time: there’s jason’s memorial case, and - oh, here’s dicks old nightwing suit, we call it discowing cuz frankly it’s kinda —

duke: it’s beautiful.

tim: what.

duke: all those bright colors, i bet he pulled in this suit

tim: i mean, i guess he was dating starfire, but she’s not exactly a normal girl —

duke: im gonna have to take notes, maybe dick will help design my suit?

dick wrapping his arms around duke and leading him away to discuss suit ideas: i’m glad someone appreciates my artistic eye

jason: imma kms, there’s two now

[lifeofdc]

i laughed out loud. best batman dialogue ever.

(batman fortress #1)