mfb-better-fury

[mfb-better-fury]

I’m Tired

I've been thinking about this again. Thinking about all I wanted to do with it.

I wanted to expand on a lot of characters. Bring some back. Explore possibilities more. I wanted to give Hikaru a spotlight again. I wanted to explore Dynamis more. I wanted to add some depth to characters that I felt didn't get enough.

But this feels like...so much. So, so much. I had better words for this earlier, but now that I've sat down to type them, it's all left me. And honestly, I feel like that sums up what this project has become. Words I don't have.

This is one of 3 MFB projects I've been trying and failing to juggle for quite some time now. This, my Madoka ask blog, my Sea Rose AU... The sad thing is, if I was told I had to pick one right now to drop, it would be this one. I don't know what happened. Maybe I overhyped things for myself. It burnt me out. I expanded things too much and it became too overwhelming to deal with. I'm stretched too thin.

I wanted to come back to this. I think I still do. There's so much I had planned that I'm really proud of, really excited to explore...

I tried to get back at it. I thought about the direction I wanted to go, how I might change it, and I figured out how I would. I'm quite solid on it. I opened my notes and tried to clean them up a little... Tried. The key word.

I'm tired.

There are things I'm more excited to work on. Things I am starting to pick back up. Things that will have me dash across the room to my computer to start typing and then suddenly it's been an hour and I have an entire character relationship figured out and it makes me cry and it's beautiful. I feel that with Sea Rose. I feel that with Pink Genius. I feel that with the Bakugan project I make for myself and no one else. I don't feel that here right now.

I don't feel like I'm making this for me. I used to. But I don't think I am now. If I had to pick one blog to focus on returning to, it would be Pink Genius. If I had to pick one MFB rewrite to focus on, it would be Sea Rose. If I had to pick between a project I've announced and people are waiting for, and one I've kept locked up in my computer and notebooks for me, myself, and I... It would be the project I make for me.

This isn't a cancellation. This isn't the end. This isn't goodbye. But I need to let go of this weight.

When I come back to this, I want to start over. I know I want to change the project name to something less jokey. I know the direction I want so many things to go in. I have plans, and I have them put together, and when I'm ready, they'll be there.

When I'm ready to make this for me, I will. But I'm not ready to right now. That's all there is to it.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

A Collection of Thoughts

The following was posted in the BF Discord server about 2 weeks ago. I’ve finally decided to share it here.

I miss this project. I do. I was so hyped for it, I had so many ideas, and yet it’s just been left sitting here gathering dust for months.

This is entirely my own fault.

I’m not a project manager. Especially when other people are involved. I can barely keep track of everything I need for personal projects. How am I supposed to keep track of other people who are doing their parts too?

I didn’t. And that’s where things fell apart.

This is not a project I want to do by myself. Honestly, I feel like it’s not a project I can do by myself. Not in any semblance of consistency. Not the way I’m doing it. Not in a way that wouldn’t burn me out 50 times over, if I even lasted long enough to get to that point.

I want to write this. But there are obstacles not just in my way, but actively pushing me away from doing so.

First, as I’ve said before, summarizing the events of the canon episodes is a vital part of the way I’m doing this. It’s honestly half the work, but it’s something I find incredible tedious. I’m capable of it, absolutely, but it doubles the amount of time I spend working on the project. If I could get help on this, it would speed things up tremendously, and it would be a lot of stress off my shoulders. (Since posting this in the server, I have gotten an offer to help from someone.)

Second, and this is something I’ve been debating for quite some time in my hiatus, I’m no longer satisfied with the direction I was taking a few things. It’s absolutely possible to fix this, but it would mean reworking every single episode I’ve put out so far. I don’t think it would be incredibly difficult once I figure out what I want to put in its place, but figuring that out is definitely going to be tricky. And…until I do, I can’t write anything else for this. That’s just the truth. I wouldn’t mind doing it. Not to make something I love. I’m actively going to be thinking about this from now on, because I want to come back to this. But I can’t unless I feel like I can actually get the project done. And that brings me to my third point:

I need a consistent source of help. If nothing else, I need it for the episode summaries. This isn’t a jab at the people who’ve helped me previously; I’m horrific at communicating and pushing any sort of deadline. But I also hardly ever got word from some people who said they would help. While some of that can be put on me for not reaching out, and some of it can be attributed to people’s lives being busy, I was told that I would have help, and I didn’t get it. This wasn’t everyone, and I’m certainly not naming names, but it’s how I feel. No one person has all the blame.

My fourth obstacle is my own notes. The disastrous mess that they are is something that needs completely redone. I won’t be able to get anywhere without cleaning them up, and I am not looking forward to that. With my notes as they are, I have no idea what’s meant to be going on, and no idea if I want to keep every concept. As I said above, I know there’s one thing I want to remove, but otherwise, I…don’t know what I’m looking at.

In general, there is a lot going on in my own life, and I cannot at this moment commit to returning to this project. But I am thinking about it. I will be cleaning up what I have to figure out where I am in everything. That much, I can do right now. But I don’t know when this will come back. And that upsets me. But first and foremost, I have to take care of myself. I have to put together my life before I can go back to putting together these episodes.

I’m sorry for the long absence, and I hope there won’t be another one like this. But I don’t know right now.

#mod reblog

[mfb-better-fury]

A Collection of Thoughts

The following was posted in the BF Discord server about 2 weeks ago. I’ve finally decided to share it here.

I miss this project. I do. I was so hyped for it, I had so many ideas, and yet it's just been left sitting here gathering dust for months.

This is entirely my own fault.

I'm not a project manager. Especially when other people are involved. I can barely keep track of everything I need for personal projects. How am I supposed to keep track of other people who are doing their parts too?

I didn't. And that's where things fell apart.

This is not a project I want to do by myself. Honestly, I feel like it's not a project I can do by myself. Not in any semblance of consistency. Not the way I'm doing it. Not in a way that wouldn't burn me out 50 times over, if I even lasted long enough to get to that point.

I want to write this. But there are obstacles not just in my way, but actively pushing me away from doing so.

First, as I've said before, summarizing the events of the canon episodes is a vital part of the way I'm doing this. It's honestly half the work, but it's something I find incredible tedious. I'm capable of it, absolutely, but it doubles the amount of time I spend working on the project. If I could get help on this, it would speed things up tremendously, and it would be a lot of stress off my shoulders. (Since posting this in the server, I have gotten an offer to help from someone.)

Second, and this is something I've been debating for quite some time in my hiatus, I'm no longer satisfied with the direction I was taking a few things. It's absolutely possible to fix this, but it would mean reworking every single episode I've put out so far. I don't think it would be incredibly difficult once I figure out what I want to put in its place, but figuring that out is definitely going to be tricky. And...until I do, I can't write anything else for this. That's just the truth. I wouldn't mind doing it. Not to make something I love. I'm actively going to be thinking about this from now on, because I want to come back to this. But I can't unless I feel like I can actually get the project done. And that brings me to my third point:

I need a consistent source of help. If nothing else, I need it for the episode summaries. This isn't a jab at the people who've helped me previously; I'm horrific at communicating and pushing any sort of deadline. But I also hardly ever got word from some people who said they would help. While some of that can be put on me for not reaching out, and some of it can be attributed to people's lives being busy, I was told that I would have help, and I didn't get it. This wasn't everyone, and I'm certainly not naming names, but it's how I feel. No one person has all the blame.

My fourth obstacle is my own notes. The disastrous mess that they are is something that needs completely redone. I won't be able to get anywhere without cleaning them up, and I am not looking forward to that. With my notes as they are, I have no idea what's meant to be going on, and no idea if I want to keep every concept. As I said above, I know there's one thing I want to remove, but otherwise, I...don't know what I'm looking at.

In general, there is a lot going on in my own life, and I cannot at this moment commit to returning to this project. But I am thinking about it. I will be cleaning up what I have to figure out where I am in everything. That much, I can do right now. But I don't know when this will come back. And that upsets me. But first and foremost, I have to take care of myself. I have to put together my life before I can go back to putting together these episodes.

I'm sorry for the long absence, and I hope there won't be another one like this. But I don't know right now.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

Okay I’m gonna make this quick and to the point because honestly I have a lot I need to do and hate that I have to say this but-

This project is going on an official hiatus. Why? Because I’m starting the process of moving and really need to focus on that. Winter + a Bakugan hyperfocus screwed me over anyway. You may have noticed I didn’t even bother with a December update.

I don’t know when I’ll be back. I want to finish this project. Part of me is so frustrated I don’t even want to look at it. Part of me thinks completely putting it away for a while will help me come back to it later and see what’s making me struggle with it. I can hope, yeah?

I will still be taking offers to help with Fury episode summarizing. Dear God please help me, I am but one woman. Just because I won’t be working on the project doesn’t mean I won’t respond to things here.

Obligatory thank you for your patience and apology for so few updates. I need to go work out how to sort through my stuff. See you...at some point!

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

November Update

Right, I’ll keep this short. The first half of the month I was unable to focus on most of my projects. The second half of the month I ended up stuck in a hyperfocus on another show and only got out of it yesterday.

Like I said last month, I’m finishing some part of this project before the end of the year. I’m not sure what, but I don’t want to end on a note of ‘nothing’.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

October Update

I was, unfortunately, not very lucky this month. I’m afraid I didn’t get to work on anything at all. My brain is still foggy and I’m concerned I’m about to get into, or have already hit, my winter “cannot create anything, see you next spring” state.

I love this project. I’m not quitting it no matter how long it takes. I will get something done before the year is over, even if it doesn’t manage to be an episode.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

Wow. This is blessed. Keep doing the work my friends.

I am. Doing My Best. Thank you very much.

#mod post #anon

[mfb-better-fury]

September Update

Hellooooo, it’s been a while! I let myself take a bit of a break while I was posting the first arc, so there hasn’t been a reason to make one of these.

I’m really glad I took that break, honestly, because my brain’s been unfortunately very foggy the past several weeks. I haven’t quite gotten it back yet, but I’m not coming empty-handed.

I do have almost the entirety of the next arc planned. There’s just some finetuning left to do at this point. And, with the help of the people who have been summarizing the canon episodes, 2 of the 4 episodes for the island arc have been summarized. They just need to be gone through and edited a little before I can get to work on the rewrites.

I hope to get myself put together in the next month and get a little work done. So, with luck, I’ll have at least a little progress to share next time.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

Thank you to those who’ve offered to help! I just wanted to add this as I completely forgot to when giving the first person the link--for episodes you’d like to/are planning on doing, you can mark those as taken so that someone else doesn’t end up doing the same one. Color the title name, just put “(taken)” beside it, whatever works for you.

Help Wanted: Fury Episode Summarizer

As I’ve mentioned in the past, part of my writing process is to watch the Fury episodes and copy down all of the events and summarize the dialogue because of how much will be part of the episodes I write. It gives me a solid base and helps me make sure I don’t miss any important details.

The problem is, I don’t like doing this. And after thinking on it for several weeks, I’m very aware that this is stalling any work on future episodes. Sure, I’ll drag my butt into doing it eventually, and it probably won’t even take a huge amount of time to do, but I just plain don’t want to. And I don’t want that to stall episodes. It’s not fair to all of you who’ve been waiting more patiently than I feel like I deserve.

If anyone actually enjoys doing that sort of thing, or feels like they have the time or dedication to do it, please let me know. I’ll give you a link to a doc to show the summaries that have been done so that you can see what it is I’m aiming for. You can put your own finished products there.

Even if you think you could only do one or two episodes, that would be helpful. It’s a big job that takes time and I honestly don’t feel like it’s something one person should have to do alone.

I won’t be hurt, annoyed, or disappointed if no one replies to this. I get that it’s a tedious thing to do. It’s just been on my mind so much that I needed to get it out there whatever the outcome ends up being. I promised a rewrite and I want to make sure I deliver on that promise.

If you want to offer but aren’t sure what it is you’d be doing, I can easily take a screenshot from the doc and share it here.

#mod post

[mfb-better-fury]

And here we are with a bonus: Our beloved Akiko Hasama! She’s what we like to call pseudo-canon.

Art done by @artisadie again, and that’s our last one for now!

#mfbbf extras #Better Fury

[mfb-better-fury]

Help Wanted: Fury Episode Summarizer

As I’ve mentioned in the past, part of my writing process is to watch the Fury episodes and copy down all of the events and summarize the dialogue because of how much will be part of the episodes I write. It gives me a solid base and helps me make sure I don't miss any important details.

The problem is, I don't like doing this. And after thinking on it for several weeks, I'm very aware that this is stalling any work on future episodes. Sure, I'll drag my butt into doing it eventually, and it probably won't even take a huge amount of time to do, but I just plain don't want to. And I don't want that to stall episodes. It's not fair to all of you who've been waiting more patiently than I feel like I deserve.

If anyone actually enjoys doing that sort of thing, or feels like they have the time or dedication to do it, please let me know. I’ll give you a link to a doc to show the summaries that have been done so that you can see what it is I'm aiming for. You can put your own finished products there.

Even if you think you could only do one or two episodes, that would be helpful. It's a big job that takes time and I honestly don't feel like it's something one person should have to do alone.

I won't be hurt, annoyed, or disappointed if no one replies to this. I get that it's a tedious thing to do. It's just been on my mind so much that I needed to get it out there whatever the outcome ends up being. I promised a rewrite and I want to make sure I deliver on that promise.

If you want to offer but aren’t sure what it is you’d be doing, I can easily take a screenshot from the doc and share it here.

#mod post #originally i wasn't going to extend this outside the server but... #i can't do all this on my own

[mfb-better-fury]

Hikaru is here!

While the outfit was designed by me, the art was drawn by @minccinoocappuccino

#mfbbf extras #Better Fury

[mfb-better-fury]

Okay, I’m not sure what happened. This wasn’t supposed to post until next Saturday, but.....okay, I guess he got impatient? lol

More importantly, I neglected to add a credit link. This image was drawn by @artisadie 

Next, we have our blue boy Gingka! A mix of his original, his Zero G design, and what little bit Adachi’s drawn of young Ryo

#i must have scheduled it wrong #oh well #mfbbf extras #Better Fury

[mfb-better-fury]

We start off our Arc 1 art posts with Madoka! I gave her the shorts she deserves.

Fun fact 1: When looking for references for her bey holder, the first clear screenshot I found made it look like an irregular hexagon. Meanwhile all the little less clear things I’ve seen are more square-ish. I decided to go with the hexagon just because.

Fun fact 2: They took it away from her in her Fury redesign. I gave it back.

#mfbbf extras #Better Fury

[mfb-better-fury]

Profiles

Arc 1

Profiles are separated by what the character’s role is in each arc. This means sometimes a character will move to a different page if their role shifts, such as if a legendary blader’s debut and awakening/realization are in different arcs.

Next arc I’ll provide a short key to know what profiles are new, edited, and unchanged.

#Better Fury #mfbbf extras

[mfb-better-fury]

Episode 5

Keep reading

#episode reblog

[mfb-better-fury]

Post Arc 1 Notes

The first arc is complete, and the response you’ve all given has been the best part of my summer.

The past few months have been dreadful, emotional and exhausting to say the least. Posting these episodes and getting to see the reactions has made me smile in what has been the worst summer of my life. I’m beyond grateful for every note and every kind word. I honestly want to cry. I don’t have the words to express how much your excitement means to me.

Thank you. That’s all I have.

On the subject of content, the arc 1 profile link will be posted next Saturday, to the best of my ability. The timing of the arc-related art is less certain, so I’ll hold off on any promises for now.

As for the next arc, I can’t give any estimates at the moment. There’s some coordination I have to do with others and words are hard for me to deal with right now. I do have the basic idea for the arc, so we’re more at 5% than 0.

For now, thank you for enjoying the beginning of this project that has become such a huge, wonderful part of my life. I wouldn’t have the strength to keep pushing for it without you.

#mod post