newfangledsoul

[newfangledsoul]

literally me every single night

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[newfangledsoul]

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[newfangledsoul]

#ffs

[newfangledsoul]

bella was lucky she didn’t have a cell phone of any kind because you know ya boi edward would be blowing up that phone 24-7 going “saw a snail today…. effervescent” or some shit equivalent

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[newfangledsoul]

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[newfangledsoul]

My ass is down down down by the fucking river again on a Tuesday at 1 AM

#bg3

[newfangledsoul]

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[newfangledsoul]

Found the funniest thing I’ve ever seen about Astarion today in the YouTube comment section

#astarion #bg3 #baldur’s gate 3

[newfangledsoul]

It's stupid that bread goes bad so fast. Bread should last ten million years on your countertop. You should be able to feed yourself off the same loaf of bread from the day you are born to the day you die. They should pass down bread between generations like a family heirloom. There should be remnants of still-good bread after the heat death of the universe.

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[newfangledsoul]

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

[newfangledsoul]

the inherent eroticism of wearing a dagger strapped to your upper thigh

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[newfangledsoul]

most notable times of being hit on by customers:

guy who tried to impress me with card tricks and failed every single one of them

old man who attempted to get my number when his wife walked away and slipped me his email address ending with “@ aol.com” when i said i don’t do that

cute gay couple that came back to tell me i was cute and then called the shop to ask me out

older professor who i talked to about folklore and told me he dressed as a wizard for recitals saying “this is really embarrassing but umm.. i’d love to get to know you more..” and gave me a receipt with his email address on it

dude in his 40s asking me on a movie date and me saying yes but then he kept starting text conversations with “ahoi hoi”

military guy who said it’d be hot if i killed him with a baseball bat

most notable time a customer did not ask me out:

a man who i knew had a wife and children getting really flustered and saying “um. ive been, uh.. idk if you remember me but um. i come in here a lot and ive uhhh haha umm ive been wanting to ask you for a couple weeks now.. um. have you read the green lantern issue i recommended??????”

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[newfangledsoul]

Scissor Wizard and Paper Wizard

It’s probably fine to leave them alone together.

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[newfangledsoul]

ᴛʜᴇ ᴀʀᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴍɪʟᴛ ᴋᴀʜʟ - ᴘᴇɴᴄɪʟ ᴛᴇꜱᴛꜱ

#disney

[newfangledsoul]

One of my favorite things about Jane Austen is that she knew the real fear wasn’t running into some terrifying Frenchman or finding your lover’s wife in the attic…it was having to spend time with someone who is slighter cooler than you are, or playing piano in front of a critical audience, or thinking a picnic will be the perfect time for your jokes but then it isn’t

#q #jane austen

[newfangledsoul]

Ryan Gosling performing “I’m Just Ken” at the Oscars 2024

#ryan gosling

[newfangledsoul]

her: you better not be a bug in a rug when i get there

my snug ass:

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