nonmonogamy-culture-is

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#amatonormativity

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Me when my partner is dating/making out with other people

Me when my partner is doing a fun creative project with a platonic friend

I want to make stuff I'm bored

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Homophobe: "You must date people of the opposite gender to you!"

Non-binary person in polyam relationships: "Instructions were unclear, but I think I followed them."

#me

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Non-monogamy culture is teaming up with a meta to surprise your mutual partner

#nonmonogamy culture is #non-monogamy culture is #nonmonogamy #non-monogamy #polyamory #polyam #polya #relationship anarchy

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I love how she wakes up and just looks at them like, oh, okay, this is happening, nice. Poly relationship goals, right there.

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Relationship anarchy is fire, why aren’t more people doing this

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I've been in nonmonogamous relationships for over ten years, but I was always the partner whose partners were dating other people while I had only one partner at a time. Flash forward to now, I have a long term bf and recently fell for a friend and we started dating, things are going great except I am struggling with guilt regarding my two relationships. I never had to deal with this before and I've found it pretty challenging. Do you know of anyone who has written about this or have any thoughts on how to deal? My partners assure me I am not wronging them, but I can't get the thought out of my head that I am treating them poorly simply by wanting to be with both of them.

This is definitely sounding like you have some internalized beliefs about relationships, thanks to our amatonormative society. I personally haven't experienced guilt over enm, but I'll try and help as best I can. If any of my followers have more experience with this, please feel free to help out, it'll be appreciated.

I think my main advice would be to consider how you feel about them dating another people and understand that they probably feel the same. Better yet, have a conversation with them about how exactly you all feel about your partners other relationships. Personally, I really, really like my people having other relationships. I like knowing that the weight of fulfilling every one of their emotional and physical needs doesn't just fall on my shoulders. I like seeing them happy and free and enjoying relationships with people who are different from me, bring different things to the table. I imagine a lot of non-monogamists feel this way, including your partners. Talk to them and see what they enjoy about it. Communication is always key.

Another thing, how would you feel if one or both of them felt guilty for being enm? Do you think they should feel guilty? Do you feel wronged, cheated, or hurt by them having other relationships? If not, why should they? Especially considering they've confirmed that they're a-okay with it.

I wish you the best, hope this helped!

#this is a little outside my realm of expertise #so sorry if my advice is shit #non-monogamy #nonmonogamy #polyamory #polyam #advice

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I've never believed there to be a "relationship escalator" even aside from being polya, people are so unique & interesting, I don't think it's fair to describe relationships so narrowly. I see it more as a ball pit; you never know what you're getting into until you just dive in.

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If I’m not flirting with my friends, I’m complimenting the waiter on his haircut ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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THE BASTARD SON AND THE DEVIL HIMSELF IS A MAGICAL BRUTAL QUEER ADVENTURE AND IF IT GETS CANCELLED WE FUCKING RIOT

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Help Save our Bisexual Baby Witch, his Destructo-Bomb GF & his Punk Croissant BF

the cast of Half Bad: The Bastard Son & The Devil Himself have tweeted that this is a CRUCIAL week for getting views for the show. if you haven't heard of it this is an incredible netflix show with AMAZING representation (poc, bisexual, queer & poly characters).

"Magical and brutal, this Netflix adaptation explores prejudice and family lineage, while presenting a nuanced portrait of teenage sexuality at the same time. [It is about] how the systems of power affect children and provides a nuanced look at identity and determinism" - via Linda Codega, just one of many positive reviews for the show including a 92% score on rotten tomatoes

help us get a second season by streaming the show ASAP! even if you don't watch it, just have it playing in the background (as long as it isn't muted.) rewatches also help! we are so grateful for any views and help to signal boost <3 this show means a lot to us both bc of the rep and how badly we want to see more of these chars

if you need more of a reason, just look at how cute the main poly relationship is

please help us get a second season for more of this incredible representation and story! check out Half Bad: The Bastard Son & The Devil Himself and tell your friends!

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here is my one bit of wisdom as a 32 year old with no interest in being a "fandom elder" or "community mom" or whatever -

if someone a little older in your friend group takes care of things and has good advice to offer and whatever, and you all sometimes joke abt them being the mom friend, that's fine and normal

if someone self declares themselves as the mom friend, and begins to act like that is a role with actual authority, Fucking Run

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Every polyam person in my life has expressed interest in learning Dungeons & Dragons. The laws of nature are unavoidable even for those unaware of them

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I don’t see it as a sexuality per se, but I think it’s more than a lifestyle for me. I didn’t choose to be polyamorous, and I couldn’t be happy being monogamous long-term. So it’s a little bit of both, ig

I'm just curious.

Fellow polyamorous people, do you consider your polyamory to be a sexuality or a lifestyle?

I'm bisexual and polyamorous. I've always thought of the former as my sexuality and the latter as my lifestyle.

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um why are you stealing my post? You could literally have just reblogged it, so what’s the point?

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The most important thing about relationships is consent. So it's silly to say that non-committal relationships are "bad" or "hurts people" because those relationships also have consent in them. All relationships are fine relationships if there is proper consent involved. You don't have to want to do it yourself, but it also is not your right to judge others for what's best for their lifestyle and happiness