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giving frank his own account now so i won’t have to have hassle when i inevitably wanna do it later so ✌️

#OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞ #same url

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the actor who played john pilgrim really does always understand the assignment 

#he never misses #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞

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swear frank castle is the only mcu adaptation that’s better than his comic counterpart 

#i know dudebros would crucify me for this and u know what let them #idc #netflix frank is for the girls and the gays #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞ #at least as far as main characters go

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“You know if you asked me once, I would’ve told you I was pretty much just like anyone else. And all I really gave a shit about was that my family was healthy or happy. But I lost them. Everything changed. I thought… I thought I became something different. But last night… I had a little chat with my wife. I sat by her grave, and I realized something. This is always who I was. And Maria… she knew. She knew what I was. She loved me anyway.”

#no but the merging of frank's compartmentalized pieces of himself in s2 #is something i am thinking about a lot #letting his 'war time' self and his 'at home self' #be one thing #because he spent so long trying to separate it for so long and #wasn't even fully conscious of #it all until that night #VISAGE: ❝ when i look in the mirror i just see them not looking back at me. ❞ #FRANK: ❝ the ache means your heart's still beating. it means your soul is alive. ❞ #it's a bit fascinating that both billy and frank are on paralleled arcs in s2 of #reconciling all their pieces

[pnished-moved]

ofthclight·: karen page

he doesn’t usually linger. it’s the one good thing about frank. he’s not a lingerer. which is why — when he crosses the short distance from her kitchen to her living room and sets a beer down in front of her — she knows it’s pointless to hide. he sits. she thinks vaguely how odd it is to see him here. and the silence stretches for a small eternity before karen finally speaks. ❝ he would have been 30. ❞  her voice comes out quiet, thumb lightly picking at the label on her beer bottle. ❝ today. he would have been 30. ❞  instead, the ground in vermont will probably have frozen by now. burying him six feet under frozen peat. she wonders if her father still clears the snow away from his headstone. karen swallows, lifting her beer and taking a few large swallows, wishing it had the same burn as something stronger. ❝ but he’s not. ❞  she nods, hair falling in her face that she doesn’t bother to push back. there’s a crack in her voice when she speaks again, tears welling in her eyes, tongue wetting her lower lip before she pulls it between her teeth.  ❝ because i killed him. and now i’ll never know if he…if he would have gone to college or met a nice girl or…figured out how to not be such a stubborn pain in the ass. ❞

             he’s been an asshole caught up in his own turmoil,  it took him too long to recognize that shadow in the corner of her eyes.  she gives little away.  bits and pieces at a time.  but hell,  if he’s gotten good at anything it’s learning to bide his time.  whether it’s hunkered down in the mud and sweat waiting for the right millisecond to pull a trigger.  or this:  waiting for one storm of a woman to finally let him find that hurricane’s eye where all the answers reside.  his own beer sits right in front of him but it’s forgotten the moment she speaks.  frank barely shifts where he sits,  elbows digging into his knees.  he’s quiet a few moments after,  only a breath huffed out at the latter comment.  always something about younger brothers and being little shits.  ❝  that runs in the family,  huh?  ❞   trigger finger rubs back and forth over a knuckle while frank gathers his thoughts.   ❝  look i...i’m not gonna sit here and be the asshole who tries to make all your guilt go away.  we both know i’m not the guy for that.  ❞  muscle in his jaw flexes and he furrows his brows.   eyes narrow as his gaze flickers back and forth between the coffee table and karen’s grief covered features   ❝  you’ve...you always listen.  so if—you need someone to talk to,  someone who gets it...  ❞  he doesn’t really need to say it does he?  he’s here.  and after all the shit she’s put up with from him the least he can do is let her have her pain without having to cover it up or have someone trying to nullify it.  

#ofthclight #MAIN: ❝ you are the desctructive foundation the ashes are risen from. ❞ #*cries*

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@tallonedachille​ billy sent: “ you left and— i thought you weren’t coming back. ”

              ❝   you know,  bill i —  i thought it was better that way.   ❞   his life is nothing but a trail of ruin.  some days sitting up at the top of that building,  night after night beating cement with a hammer,  he wanted to tell himself it wasn’t always like that.  but it was.  long before his family was ripped away from him,  there was always blood left behind by the imprints his footsteps make.  hell,  maria said it.  every time you leave a little more of you over there.  he’s always been the war and how could he bring that to billy’s door when it’s all he is now?   frank shakes his head and glances off towards the frigid waters.   ❝  you got out of it.  made somethin’ of yourself.  i wasn’t gonna come draggin’ you back into those shit filled trenches again.  ❞  

#tallonedachille #ANSWERED: ❝ copy that，loud and clear. ❞ #SEASON 1: ❝ people think torture is pain. it's not pain. it's time. ❞

[pnished-moved]

#bye #ABOUT: ❝ aint no grave can hold my body down. ❞

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the scene where billy is cleaning up dinah will never not be so creepy 

#me: maybe i won't be as disturbed the second time around #me: nope it was definitely just as unsettling #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞

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#VISAGE: ❝ when i look in the mirror i just see them not looking back at me. ❞ #FRANK: ❝ the ache means your heart's still beating. it means your soul is alive. ❞

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ofthclight·: foggy nelson

❝ great! ❞ great. because this might as well be happening. because there’s absolutely nothing bad that can come from the punisher camping out in his office. ❝ so then i guess we’ll just hang out until matt gets back. ❞ if matt gets back. which is questionable, as of late. ❝ can i get you some coffee? peach cobbler? mrs. consuela makes a killer crust. homemade too. hey, or we could talk about the statute of limitations on murder while we wait. you know there is none? ❞

             his arms cross comfortably over his chest as he sits back in his chair,  feet resting on top of the table.  alright,  maybe he’s being a little indecent but these guys rub him in all the wrong ways.  brows lower into something of a scrutinizing expression,  dark eyes running over nelson.  ❝  that coffee as full of shit as your legal services?  ❞   he questions dryly.  it has been a few hours since he’s pumped himself up on caffeine,  cobbler doesn't sound too bad either.   but he's not here to play games.  ❝   memory serves,  you can do your own talkin’ just fine.  ❞  

#ofthclight #this is #so chaotic

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frank: 🔪😡 me listening to 1 hour loop of invisible string: 😃

#i cannot explain why my brain fixated on this song today but the contrast to what i'm writing is so funny #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞

[pnished-moved]

tallonedachille​: billy russo

      “            Go on then Frankie. Put a bullet in me , two if you think one won’t do the job.” 𝐈𝐅 𝐈𝐓 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐘 , 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐁𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘? Billy would be six feet under. Sometimes he wonders if he would have been better off if he’d died that day. If Frank would have found some kind of peace. “You sure about that? cause’ it looks like you kept me alive for a reason and it wasn’t just so i’d remember what i’d done , you made sure i couldn’t.” 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐒𝐄𝐄𝐌 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐇𝐄'𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓 𝐔𝐏 - 𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐄. 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐀 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐑. 𝐌𝐀𝐘𝐁𝐄 𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑. The thing is , he gets no pleasure from seeing Frank like this - in fact ; all he feels is guilt , anger , confusion. He rakes a hand through now cropped hair , trying to make some sense of all this. “What do you want?”

             oh,  his trigger finger is itchy alright.  he’s practically begging for it like some pathetic wounded bird and that’s the part that keeps making him hesitate.  because that’s not billy.  that’s not the shitstain that sat back and watched his children get slaughtered.  maybe the man whose face he bashed in did die that night because he isn’t sure he recognizes the one staring at him now.  frank shakes his head,  every muscle in his body tense,  screaming to just end this.  he doesn’t have a shred of fucks to give about the delusions bill has got himself under.   ❝  what do i want?  what do i want— i want my goddamn family back you piece of shit.  ❞   calloused fingers reach out to curl around billy’s shirt,  pistol lowered slightly as he shoves him back towards a wall.  ❝  that was our family,  bill.  ours.  and you let them— ❞  he shakes his head again,  his voice nothing but a growl.  ❝  your niece.  your nephew.  put in the ground.  nothing but shredded meat.  you did that. YOU.  ❞  the barrel of his gun is placed against the other man’s temple.  ❝  you wanna know what they looked like laying there?  goddamn coward. ❞

#tallonedachille #i am very uncomfortable with the energy we have created in the studio today #SEASON 2: ❝ you know kid，sometimes you find things and they change your life. ❞

[pnished-moved]

FRANK + SEXUALITY

i’ve been considering frank’s sexuality and while on the surface he gives off heavy cishet energy,  i think he’s the kind of guy who just never thought about it.  he grew up in an environment where being queer wasn’t particularly looked down on,  but he hadn’t examined it in himself.  plus the first 12 years of his service was during the ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ period.  he married maria somewhere in there.  so it never became a point of importance to him.  he looked out for the members of his unit who might have been targeted for their identity and was big on people not being discriminated against for any reason.  a lot of his interaction with discussions of gender and sexuality had to do with how it affected service members.  i also hc maria was extremely politically active as a liberal democrat and they probably had all sorts of conversations,  but he just never thought it pertained to him on a personal level. 

that being said,  though he would probably go unlabeled,  he is bisexual.  he has a strong preference for women but has found himself drawn towards men at times.  especially given marines and military men can just be fucking gay as hell in the most unacknowledged ways.  it was just a complex environment for him.  but never quite registered it as such.  he has yet to realize that part of himself.  and as yet has no romantic or sexual experiences with men.

#dev. #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞

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jigscw​: billy russo

❝ hey man, ❞  his smile — as practiced as it is — is rarely genuine. but it is now. hand stretching out to grab frank’s before pulling him in for a hug. pulling back, billy gives him a quick appraisal, shaking his head.  ❝ you look like shit. you let yourself go already? ❞   something in his eyes dulls as he takes a step back, easy humor slipping away. again, he looks around — makes it look casual, instead of paranoid, but frank knows him well enough to know it’ll be the latter. what he’s doing will get him killed. ruined, and then killed. what rawlins wants, rawlins gets, there’s no question of the matter. no room for morality. and with the amount of shit they got themselves into overseas, he doesn’t exactly have a leg to stand on.  ❝ i got a favor to ask you. ❞  he doesn’t look at him as he says it. however much history lies between them — he’s practically burning it down right now. the others were easy. gunner’s giving them a bit of trouble, but gunner was always good at hunkering down and hiding out. but it’s not the others he’s worried about.  ❝ i know you and maria have your uh, your traditions and shit. ❞ the kind of wholesome family outings that make him nauseous. the next words are forced out. his eyes still on the water lapping over the concrete of the dock. it’s the only place he can ensure isn’t being watched.  ❝ do me a favor and skip that this time, yeah? maybe uh…take a vacation. someplace nice. ❞  someplace that isn’t this shitstain of a city.          /          @pnished​   +   hiii

              it’s a little odd for billy to be coming around looking for him so soon.  but he accepts the embrace,  accepts his presence  (  he’ll always be at home with the castles  ).  frank huffs out a breath at the comment,  something akin to a chuckle catching in his throat   ❝  yeah well,  some of us got kids and can’t afford all that beauty sleep you must be takin.’  ❞   the unfortunate truth is,  sleep is just about the only thing he’s felt like doing lately.  but that’s not billy’s problem to worry about.  something,  though,�� is worrying him.  it’s all over his face.  in his eyes.  it makes him peer a little closer as the other man speaks,  pensive lines forming upon his features.  he shakes his head,  glancing out towards the water for a brief moment  ❝  what’s this about,  bill?  ❞  eyes narrow when they settle back on him.   ❝  what— ‘take a vacation.’  come on what is that?  ❞   this isn’t like him.  maybe rattled isn’t quite the right word for it but something’s got billy all wound up and for him to be trying to get him out of town...it makes no goddamn sense.   he just got back.  the kids have practice to go to,  maria’s got her functions.  he’s hardly got the damn energy to be taking them anywhere.  frank takes a step closer,  muscle in his jaw flexing as dark eyes glance between billy’s.  his voice drops an octave,  leaving no room for any of that squirreling around nonsense  ❝  you in some kind of trouble?  ❞

#jigscw #oh boi #VERSE FT. JIGSCW: ❝ what kind of friend is he? the life or death kind. ❞

[pnished-moved]

me watching frank shovel unseasoned scrambled eggs 

#the greatest piece of acting jon did was actually making all that set coffee and food look good #but no one can make scrambled eggs look good #sir #nasty #OOC: ❝ it’s just tumblr rp，carol. ❞

[pnished-moved]

First time, as long as I can remember, I don’t have a war to fight. And I guess, if I’m gonna be honest, I just… I’m scared.

#baby boy #go drink some water #FRANK: ❝ the ache means your heart's still beating. it means your soul is alive. ❞ #VISAGE: ❝ when i look in the mirror i just see them not looking back at me. ❞

[pnished-moved]

@ofthclight​ karen sent: [ TELL ]  for receiver to look towards sender after a battle and realize they’re bleeding.

             there’s a familiarity to the adrenaline coursing through his veins.  his fingers loosen their grip around the gun in his hands,  index moving away from the trigger.  slow breath in.  slow breath out.  four seconds each time.  just like he learned that first tour.  steady the heart,  reclaim control,  castle.  he’s turning towards karen with the question on his lips.  and he finds his answer before he can even form a syllable.  she still standing,  but crimson darkens the fabric of her blouse.  too much,  too fast.   ❝  no, no, no— hey—  ❞   he’s stepping over bodies to get to her as swiftly as possible.  firearm is discarded onto a bullet-ridden surface he doesn’t spare a glance to and then he’s there,  pressing his palm down against her wound.  this is horrifyingly familiar too.  chest rises and falls rapidly,  the regulation of those breaths completely broken.  this cannot be happening.   frank swallows thickly as he tries to think,  assessing the damage.  he has to calculate their options here.  ❝  alright— okay,  ❞  breathed out in a mumble as his eyes flicker between the blood and her face  ❝  we gonna sit you down.  but you gotta stay upright,  you hear me?  ❞  he’s taken care of more bullet wounds than he can count.  but...it’s different.  this is different in all the ways she isn’t supposed to experience.  it’s a mumble to himself more than her as he guides her towards where she can sit.  ❝  you’re okay.  you’re gonna be fine.   ❞  he can fix this.  he has to fix it. 

#ofthclight #vine vc: aw fuk i can't believe you've done this #ANSWERED: ❝ copy that，loud and clear. ❞