satansjizzeggs

[satansjizzeggs]

never thought I’d find myself writing “the tight ring of his ass sucked me in”

#I’m writing König getting pegged. sue me. #help help help help the cops are banging at my door #WHY ARE THEY YELLING ‘’ME NEXT’’ WTF #the cod brain rot just chewed me up spit me out and called me a dirty fucking whore

[satansjizzeggs]

Take your pick

#where’s the lie #have you SEEN König’s model??? WHOSE HORSE IS THAT #‘’whip it out for me big boy’’ proceeds to pull out a 13ft tall street lamp #ghost acts like hes swinging the biggest balls of the entire SAS #cod modern warfare #cod könig #simon ghost riley

[satansjizzeggs]

Simon “Ghost” Riley but if he was a teenage dirtbag. Foaming at the mouth.

#thots have been thunk #ghost with little earrings and the spiked gelled hair? creaming #sobbing screaming throwing up #simon ghost riley #cod modern warfare #modern warfare 2

[satansjizzeggs]

#the lord has put me in this position as a test of strength #i would….do many unholy things if only given the chance #the Catholic Church is out to get me for my sins wracking up like old receipts #modern warfare 2 #cod modern warfare #john price #simon ghost riley

[satansjizzeggs]

ew spitting kinks are so gross why would I want a man spitting his saliva in my mout—

Ghost spitting his bourbon and saliva into my mouth like the dirty little whore I am

#and I’ll be speechless when god presents this to me on judgment day #twirling my hair and kicking my feet #the absolute chokehold ghost has me in rn #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley smut #cod modern warfare #modern warfare 2

[satansjizzeggs]

me n my babygirl simon ‘ghost’ riley <3333 - (2022) colorized

#😡😡😡 ghost would NOT smile in that scene he’s a cold hard KILLER #i would literally bend him over and fuck him in the ass #pillow princess ghostie <333 #gonna call him my little boo boo bear #simon ghost riley #cod modern warfare

[satansjizzeggs]

Me, intentionally starting drama with the tall people of Pinterest:

#a book where I go out of my way to make tall peoples lives progressively harder #i find people who state that their 6ft+ and then my fingers just started moving on their own #i just asked a person who was 6’6’’ if they could throw me

[satansjizzeggs]

I did not expect to get suddenly assaulted by a wasp in my room at 1AM by the same bug I thought was a very large mosquito hours prior and sprayed relentlessly with hairspray and inevitably lost on my floor. Who then came back hours later by trying to attack me only to fly face first into my iPad screen (also subsequently directly into Commander Data’s face because I’m watching TNG) as I then proceeded to fling my iPad, and behead a wasp with my slipper and freaked out as it continued to twitch lifelessly on my blanket.

#commander data…you kissed a fucking wasp #mf came into MY SPACE and ASSUALTED ME??? UNWARRANTED #I’m getting a FUCKING RESTRAINING ORDER #i fear for my life

[satansjizzeggs]

let the trouble commence, I’ve finally created an ao3 account 😈😈😈

#god weeps on this day #i have no humility left in my body

[satansjizzeggs]

What’s the point of writing James Wesley fanfiction if I don’t make him the biggest dilf to ever dilf 🤨🤨🤨

#heard someone say sugar daddy Wesley and I WAS INSPIRED #to say I’m absolutely lovestruck is an understatement #james wesley #daredevil

[satansjizzeggs]

tim of thee oily plant

#because I mcfuckin can #timothy olyphant

[satansjizzeggs]

My grandmother just stole two heads of cabbage just sitting in the middle of the road. She comes running back to the car going “GO GO GO” as if we just committed armed robbery at the local farmers market.

#What the fuck kinda ATLA shit is this #That poor old man and his fucking cabbages #Now he’s gotta worry abt my grandma STEALING THEM

[satansjizzeggs]

when there’s no fanfiction on AO3 of your new favorite dilf so you have to write it yourself 😼😼

#THAT man…is so the biggest dilf #makes me go hngnngmgngfffmmffm #he could fr sing me a lullaby👊🏻👊🏻 #james wesley #daredevil #daredevil show

[satansjizzeggs]

Started watching Daredevil. Tell me why my brain sees Matt Murdock and goes “no thank you” but then sees Wesley and just about creams it’s pants. My heart sees an older man and instantly thinks they’re the sexiest old bastard alive. I’m so tired. Just let me have a normal obsession.

#daredevil #matt murdock #matthew murdock #daredevil show

[satansjizzeggs]

someone just asked me if I take commissions for my art since they liked my art style and I don’t have people skills should I ask to tongue kiss them passionately under the setting sun or is that too much

[satansjizzeggs]

No but you don’t understand, I would fuck the absolute shit out of Krem. I’d fuck him so hard, all of Tevinter would feel that shit. Tevinter as a whole would all collectively go “damnnnn” at how hard I fucked the shit out of Krem. You just don’t get it.

#the heart wants what it wants 🙈🙈🙈 #thirsting on main #krem dragon age #cremisius aclassi #dragon age #dragon age inquisition

[satansjizzeggs]

falling in love with your own ocs </3

#fuck not again #THEY’RE LITERALLY PERFECT #i cherish my ocs like literal babies of my own #I’m actually a mother of 34 #ugh #oc stuff