silvertonguc

[silvertonguc]

♡ aish week 2023 ♡ — wear your mother’s lipstick, warsan shire ruth wilson and dafne keen as marisa coulter and lyra silvertongue in his dark materials (2019-2022)

#;;album #//i love this sm !

[silvertonguc]

// okay, so, i have another meme response drafted that needs editing/finishing and a couple more to write, drafts to get to as well.

over the next 2.5 weeks, i have only 1/2 days a week free to be on a laptop to post things (but will work on drafts while travelling, on my phone.)

from the 2nd week of august until the end of that month, i'll have more free time to write. i have a LOT of muse atm, so it's all just about finding the time <3

#;;ooc #//just a li'l activity update for the next month or so #//i have a discord if anyone wants to chat ooc or whatever as well

[silvertonguc]

@toxicmalicex said: ❛   there’s an ocean of silence between us, and i’m drowning.    ❜  ( sth post hdm ? ^^ )

uncomfortable. tense. weighted was the silence ensuring estranged mother and daughter remained worlds apart, despite breathing the same air.

lack of conversation aside, lyra's dark gaze, colder than any ocean, washed over the other's expression as their silence broke with all the jarring dread of ice cracking above treacherous waters.

"en't that your job? breaking our silences. you are the —" ( mother? ) ... a disgusted expression translated abrupt demise of obvious words left unspoken. undeniably, lyra would have no difficulty conversing with the woman, should she want to. simply, she did not ... and had no qualms verbally sticking the knife into whatever remnants of a heart resided within mrs. coulter's chest.

ignoring disguised relief of her own that their stubborn silence had come to an end, she continued, "nothin'. never mind. it's just ... i expect nothin' good from you anymore. i dunno how to talk to you ... i thought you were dead, should have been relieved, but now you're here and i en't sure how to feel or what to say." bluntly, lyra was struggling. drowning, too. intellectualising every complex emotion before frustratedly shoving them, unpicked, further down, leaving room for former rambunctious self, though instead growing more detached and dejected by the day, distant even from her own daemon.

a pause, a shrug and then: "what would you have me say?"

#toxicmalicex #<333

[silvertonguc]

// survived the great war today (if you know you know) so i’m going for dinner to celebrate, but have a meme response drafted already and will do more later on if i can too!

#::ooc #//my bank is crying but i’m so happy

[silvertonguc]

quotes that broke me starters

feel free to adjust pronouns / names as needed !

quotes taken from random sources or tiktok. i claim no ownership whatsoever.

❛   i’m supposed to be the one who protects you from monsters. i’m not supposed to be one.  ❜  

❛   if i could make a deal with god, and i’d get him to swap our places.  ❜  

❛  no one heard our screams for a long time.  ❜  

❛   i know so many last words. but i’ll never know hers.  ❜  

❛   there is a home for every departed thing.  ❜  

❛   it reminded me that i will never truly know you.  ❜  

❛   i also buried a part of myself alongside them.  ❜  

❛   after you died i could no longer hold a funeral. so my life became the funeral.  ❜  

❛   you don’t have to be awake to cry.  ❜  

❛   forgive me, for all the things i did. but mostly the things i didn’t do.  ❜  

❛   the human eye is the loneliest creation of all.  ❜  

❛   fairness is for happy people.  ❜  

❛   the things we lost will always be heavier than the things that stayed. ��❜  

❛   perhaps it is the greater grief, to remain on the earth when another is gone.  ❜  

❛   you stain the pages with yourself.  ❜  

❛   tears will not wash away the sorrow.  ❜  

❛   beautiful things grow a certain height and then they fall and fade off.  ❜  

❛    who in all these centuries has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?  ❜  

❛   i have scars on my hands from touching certain people  ❜  

❛   despite everything, i believe that people are really good at heart.  ❜  

❛   you tried to change, didn’t you?  ❜

❛   you can’t make homes out of people. someone should have taught you that.  ❜  

❛   i hid my deepest feelings so well, i forgot where i placed them.  ❜  

❛   we have no scar to show for happiness. we learn so little from peace.  ❜  

❛   i didn’t leave because i stopped loving you. i left because the longer i stayed, the less i loved myself.  ❜  

❛   at every moment in our life, we have one foot in a fairytale & the other in the abyss.  ❜  

❛   there are too many sad eyes on happy faces.  ❜  

❛   it’s strange, i felt less lonely when i didn’t know you.  ❜  

❛   things change, friends leave. life doesn’t stop for anybody.  ❜  

❛   it takes a lifetime to die, and no time at all.  ❜  

❛   i am deathly afraid of almosts. of coming close to what i want and then falling just a little short.  ❜  

❛   i felt your absence.  ❜  

❛   what do we do now, now that we are happy?  ❜  

❛    you honestly thought anybody would love you? purely and truly love you?  ❜  

❛   don’t stop looking. he deserves to know someone saw his end, that someone noticed him.  ❜  

❛    i can bear my pain so long as it has meaning.  ❜  

❛   i dont have a single friend - not one.  ❜  

❛   i’ve had more than enough pain in my life, what’s a little more going to do?  ❜  

❛    it would have been you if i met you first.  ❜  

❛    i really thought he was going to be my forever.  ❜  

❛    maybe in the next life it would work.  ❜  

❛   in spite of everything, you’re still you.  ❜  

❛   the dead have it easy.  ❜  

❛   there’s an ocean of silence between us, and I’m drowning.    ❜  

❛   there have been countless times in my life when i thought i’d be better off dead.  ❜  

❛   what on earth… have i become?  ❜  

❛   don’t look at me! i don’t … i don’t want you seeing me like this.  ❜  

❛   i wish i could’ve been like you.  ❜  

❛   your fate was sweeping you away, like a flood.  ❜  

❛   the future should know the mistakes we made.  ❜  

❛   of course you have. you feel guilt. you want redemption.  ❜  

❛   i’m here because you can’t accept what you’ve done. it broke you.  ❜  

❛   even now, after all you’ve done, you can still go home.  lucky you . ❜  

❛   you’re all that’s left, and we can’t live this lie forever.  ❜  

❛    prometheus gave us light, and warmth, and eternal damnation.  ❜  

❛   take a gamble that love exists, and do a loving act.  ❜  

❛    i know i ruined your life. i suffer for it every day.  ❜  

❛   don’t let yourself get killed for… for pride. i’ve seen it kill too many folk.  ❜  

❛    you and me, we ain’t decent… but those folk… they were.  ❜  

❛   we’re more ghosts than people.  ❜  

❛   despite my best efforts to the contrary… it turns out i’ve won.  ❜  

❛   i gave you all i had … i did.  ❜  

❛   this whole time, I’ve blamed myself for that decision.  ❜  

❛   do you think even the worst person can change…? That everybody can be a good person, if they just try? ❜  

❛   i don’t want to break their hearts all over again. it’s better if they never see me.  ❜  

❛   please leave me alone. i can’t come back. i just … can’t, okay?  ❜  

❛   no matter the struggles or hardships you faced… you strived to do the right thing, you refused to hurt anyone. ❜  

❛    people like you don’t ever want to be happy.  ❜  

❛   i don’t want to let go. i’m not ready to say goodbye yet.  ❜  

#;;meme #// pleeease ! do the thing #//planning to return with activity around the busy schedule #//bc i miss lyra and everyone here <3

[silvertonguc]

despite all urges to turn and storm, quite rudely, away from the unwanted interruption of a perfectly content life with her father, lyra could not deny an interest that sparked, as always, once the topic of the north was uttered.

"lyra..." pan warned, inaudibly, his thoughts flowing through her mind as seamlessly as ever. she knew, of course, that they could not trust a woman who had managed to manipulate her father (for there was simply no chance the king would fall into a situation so suddenly.) marisa was playing a game. undeniably. perhaps, though, she could play one better.

a reassuring hand ran through pantalaimon's soft fur as deceitful child forced a more appeasing smile up at the newcomer, "alright... show me the meteorite piece. i wanna see it!"

Marisa wanted to try gaining her favor, and with all Asriel had told her about Lyra in his letters, she felt like she knew how to.

"Your father tells me you're very interested in the North. That you want to someday be an explorer like him." she began. "I'm an explorer too. That's actually how we met, you know. I was there studying the northern lights, and your father was looking for meteorites."

That was the official story, anyway. They did go, of course, but it wasn't some "chance meeting" like Marisa and Asriel were portraying it as. They intentionally met up at the same spot, with twelve years of history already between them. And thankfully with their positions and their wealth, it allowed both of them to study whatever they liked.

"Together we found this most beautiful meteorite piece. Would you like to see it?"

#viciousgold #t;;35

[silvertonguc]

⟋ i've been unwell most of this week, and still am. i haven't disappeared anywhere and will be replying to things soon ♡

#;;ooc

[silvertonguc]

     brown eyes, forever bright with life and eagerness, expanded upon asriel's initial words. so ... current summons was not consequence of careless actions? lyra, who could easily have reeled off a dozen recent incidents of which she fell firmly in the centre of, pursed gaping lips together to prevent digging herself a deeper hole and shrugged off earlier comment. 

     "oh ..." came eventual reply, careful and more thoughtful than was typical. "nevermind." thankfully, her father appeared distracted and, if lyra read him correctly, in an unusually cheerful mood.

     gradually, as they walked, curiosity grew to profound levels. once entering their lounge, intense orbs bored into ice blue, as though attempting to decipher what might be communicated before the words could form. pantalaimon, in ermine form, gravitated towards stelmaria, white neck extending towards larger, spotted form while small ears twitched.

     despite remaining lost for guesses, lyra hoped her father would share information from travels she longed to one day join... the type of information the child might develop adventurous games from, or might dream about that night. certainly, she could not have anticipated the man to reveal he was courting, much less a woman so recently met. 

     "what?" words barely sounded before the 'extraordinary', 'intelligent' woman her father had only just met was summoned into the lounge, a most unsettling, unique daemon stalking beside her.

     while the two of them were introduced, windswept, untidy youth fixed the duchess with a half-smile, half-sneer... subtle. lyra believed herself capable of expressing automatic dislike without the trouble initially suspected catching up to her after all. 

     "err... thanks?" mumbled the princess in response to marisa's greeting. following a brief glance in her father's direction, brown eyes returned to the newcomer, "how do you do?" pleasantry tasted terribly bitter, forced up dry throat as lyra attempted to process her shifting universe.

Asriel said nothing about the state of Lyra, she was his daughter and he was King, the most powerful person in this region. Why should he care if anyone had a problem with Lyra's untidiness? In truth, he had been, perhaps, far too lax with her, not that Asriel came to that conclusion. His advisors suggested it at times, and he paid them no mind.

"You didn't do anything, not that I know of anyway." Asriel chuckled. "As suspicious as that sounds, I'll let the matter drop. No, I simply want to tell you something, Lyra. Something important."

By now, as Asriel led Lyra into their lounge, Marisa was finished getting ready after their little excursion. As such, she went downstairs to the lounge where Asriel asked her to meet them, though she waited outside until Asriel would call for her.

"Now, Lyra." Asriel began, serious now despite his earlier, relaxed tone. The regal snow leopard watched Pantalaimon with soft eyes, as soft as the small smile that remained on Asriel's face as he spoke to their daughter. "On my recent journey, I met someone. Someone extraordinary. She's intelligent, she's beautiful, and she's very excited to meet you, Lyra. I intend to court her, to see if she will be a suitable match for me. But I must admit, I already feel very strongly about her. So I want you to give her a chance, alright? Have an open mind." he told her. Eager, perhaps too eager, Asriel called out to Marisa before Lyra responded. "Marisa?"

The woman walked in, her movements as graceful and delicate as the golden monkey's that walked by her side. He wanted nothing more than to leap into Stelmaria's embrace, longing to be against her plush fur again, but he kept himself in check. Marisa focused on Lyra, smiling gently at her. There was a bit of hesitation, but only a bit, and she did a good job of hiding it. She would certainly talk to Asriel later about this; The girl was covered in grass stains and her hair was a mess, but despite it all... this was her daughter. Seeing her for the first time, Marisa felt her heart begin to melt.

"Lyra, this is Duchess Marisa Coulter. Marisa, this is my daughter, Lyra." Asriel introduced.

Marisa fought back the urge to cry. She remained composed, and her expression was gentle as she gazed at Lyra. The golden monkey looked over at Pantalaimon, tempted to reach out, but again refraining.

"It's wonderful to meet you, Lyra." Marisa spoke.

[silvertonguc]

toxicmalicex​:

coruption and wickedness – ever permanent from the very early adult years. fighting fire with fire,ing her sh no suspicion it would ever backfire her way.commitng injustice in response to oppression she refused to bend under. now, though, little of that mattered anymore. cruelty – something to take pride even for it was the only thing capable of providing her with respect and freedom – not providing her with little by shame. for her own flesh and blood looked back at her with disgust.

“ control you ? no, lyra… ” she said softly, supported by a shake of the head. “ i don’t want a thing from you. ”

a lie. she wanted more than she ever deserved. not after barely sparing her own daughter a single thought for years. b l a m i n g her for the social embarrassment instead of taking responsibility for her own weaknesses. buring away the hurt she felt when she pushed her off of her arms while barely an infant. telling herself she would be much better off without a mother like her. scared – to experience the torture she faced all those years later, staring back into the said child’s eyes. her own glistering with tears.

“ a chance, ” she whispered then. “ just a chance to take care of you as i once should. chance for you to have a mother. i’ve not been ready to be one for so long – maybe ain’t still. but i do love you, lyra. i cannot contain it… ”

   if lyra ever found herself asked to name the single, most confusing aspect of mrs. coulter, undoubtedly, inconsistencies would be a significant factor. few words that left insidious mother's lips ever matched action. over time, despite far less interactions than most had with their parents, repetitive unpredictability became exhausting to follow.

    "i don't believe you," a firm yet quiet remark, "you say you don't wanna control me, but it's all i ever see from you. you tried to control me from the second you took me from jordan to go live with you as your assistant." intense stare remained fixed upon the other, pan keeping track of deceitful golden monkey from trusted safety of lyra’s side. "you had the chance to take care of me as you should then, but you hurt me in horrible ways." own daemon, flooded by memories, nestled closer with fur bristling. "i dunno much about having a mother, but what you did, what you do... that en't love."

    having felt more intensely than heard final few words spoken by estranged mother, such fierce stare could not be maintained. all sorts of uncomfortable feelings overwhelmed the girl, and she would rather mrs. coulter not recognise inner conflictions within her weakening gaze. "maybe you should try an' contain it. i don't -- i don't want it. you say you want nothing from me, well i want nothing from you." a lie, leaving lyra’s lips less fluently than most lies did, betrayed through body language, head tilting downwards. how the brunette wished such words were true... wished for apathy towards the one who caused unbearably turbulent emotions.

#toxicmalicex #t;;32

[silvertonguc]

&. 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  we  love  angst  on  this  blog,  what  can  we  say.  here’s  some  more  dialogue  prompts  for  you.  a  warning  for  potentially  triggering  themes  below.  )

❛ everything you touch, you ruin. ❜

❛ the only one who gets to kill you, is me. ❜

❛ you can’t make me disappear. ❜

❛ memories are only there to make you bleed. ❜

❛ i don’t need your permission. ❜

❛ don’t shut me out like this. ❜

❛ the less you know, the better. ❜

❛ i won’t stop killing until you kill me. ❜

❛ why is it whenever we see each other, you’re covered in blood? ❜

❛ you think i felt something for you? you’ve forgotten what i am. ❜

❛ the last time we talked, didn’t you say you wanted to kill me? ❜

❛ i felt something loosen in me that shouldn’t have been loosened. ❜

❛ pull yourself together. we have work to do. ❜

❛ stay back, i have a demon inside of me. ❜

❛ let me get closer, i have a hell inside of me where your demon can live. ❜

❛ people like that don’t deserve to live. ❜

❛ just do what you’re told. like you always do. ❜

❛ why do you have to make everyone hate you? ❜

❛ it’s better that you don’t get involved. ❜

❛ i’d do anything to make you stay. ❜

❛ who cares if it bleeds. ❜

❛ is this what you think love is? ❜

❛ just breathe through it. it gets easier. ❜

❛ don’t pretend that you cared about me. ❜

❛ i’m starting to think you like wasting my time. ❜

❛ we wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for me. ❜

❛ i will never, ever, give you a moment’s peace. ❜

❛ the world doesn’t hate us. but it doesn’t love us either. ❜

❛ it hurts that you still can’t trust me after all this time. ❜

❛ a darkness with voices is better than a silent void. ❜

❛ it’s safer to be feared, than loved. ❜

❛ am i not good enough for you? ❜

❛ a burnt child loves the fire. ❜

❛ i’m tired of dying. ❜

❛ what if you hurt because it feels good? ❜

❛ don’t try to fix me, i’m not broken. ❜

❛ if you want me to die, you can just say so. ❜

❛ you don’t have to be afraid of who you are. ❜

❛ that line disappears once you cross it. ❜

❛ how can i believe you after all you’ve done? ❜

❛ i won’t let you forget about me. ❜

❛ the person you once knew me as, died. ❜

❛ are you going to leave me again? ❜

❛ i have nothing i could offer you. ❜

❛ no one is going to save you. no one can. ❜

❛ maybe you’re / i’m already dead. ❜ 

❛ you have blood on your hands. ❜

❛ what, can’t take a punch? ❜

❛ i’m your mind giving you someone to talk to. ❜

❛ you have to step out of this darkness and let them see you for who you are, like i have. ❜

#;;memes

[silvertonguc]

@contrecoeurs sent: "You don't get to smoke." from marisa obviously

     two fingers balanced ‘stolen’ cigarette, alight but so far untouched by lips which finally encircled opposite end as mrs. coulter’s authoritative words reached the teen’s ears. 

     actions momentarily stunted by the order, lyra scowled across at a woman who believed herself within right to make such dictations. 

     “you smoke,” came rebutted response, slightly muffled, before stubborn girl took a few precautionary steps back from one who might prevent fleeting act of rebellion, and imitated the way she had witnessed her mother smoke many times. 

     defiant action, more a subconscious method to both push and irritate older blonde than any true desire for what rolled up tobacco could provide, was not executed properly, for lyra did not genuinely wish to smoke, and coughed heavily, then cleared her throat.

     “i’m old enough. it’s my choice what i do when it affects only me, en’t it? so, why try to stop me?” hand holding cigarette wavered, and lyra lowered it to her side, lifting pointed chin a fraction. silent challenge.

#contrecoeurs #<3

[silvertonguc]

⟋ i’m hoping to properly be back here... work is intense though, and i can rarely find energy to write weekday evenings, so most of my activity will be over the weekends and when i have time off, with some sporadic activity in the weeks.

going to catch up on things i owe, but always around to plot ♡

#;;ooc #⟋ i have next week and then a week off

[silvertonguc]

     dark locks, formerly clean and neatly styled, flapped wildly around lyra’s shoulders as innately rambunctious child leapt, darted and ran circles around beautiful palace’s extravagant garden with rodger, her best friend, playing a variation of the game ‘tag,’ which happened to involve multiple dive rolls upon grassy ground. 

     hearing a summoning call from her father, which left little room for any arguments, the young princess rolled ebony eyes so only the kitchen boy could see before half-walking and half-running in the direction of the king. 

     “i won’t be long,” determined princess shouted back over one shoulder, stubbornly deciding whatever her father wished to speak with her about would not ruin her fun.

     half-heartedly swiping at a grass-stain marring clothes likely deemed far too fancy to be playing in, lyra focused attention on her father once more and sighed, hoping that the sooner they had spoken, the sooner she could return to adventure and excitement. 

     “whatever it is, i didn’t do it. can i go now?” came her ‘greeting’, impatience etching within the child’s expression.

@silvertonguc

Marisa was nervous, not fully understanding why. She knew what the plan was, what it had always been, but now that it was actually happening, it was like she had swallowed a rock. She thought about Asriel's letters, about how wonderful and clever their daughter was. They made her heart soar. She was nervous, but also excited to meet her for the first time.

She met with Asriel first, and they went over what they would say. They were both so happy to be in each others' company again, rather than just letters and brief meetings every few months. They could really be together now, and they were both thrilled. After a while of being together, enjoying each other's company, talking, laughing, exploring each others' bodies again, Stelmaria and the golden monkey fiercely intertwined, eventually Marisa told Asriel they should really go and see Lyra. She was eager to meet her, despite how nervous she was. So the two of them got dressed again, Marisa working on her pristine appearance, and Asriel went downstairs to first tell Lyra of her.

"Lyra," he spoke, going out into the garden where she and Roger were playing. "Come inside, I'd like to talk with you."

#viciousgold #t;;35

[silvertonguc]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN.

what’s your phone wallpaper : a ruth wilson collage my friend made 

last song you listened to : probably ‘all too well’ (10 min version) or ‘don’t blame me’ by taylor swift

currently reading : i just started ‘eleanor oliphant is completely fine’

last movie : i rewatched ‘soul’ yesterday and cried more at the ending than i did the first time...

last show : i watched ‘sweet tooth’ season 2 recently... cutest show ever, excited for the last season!

what are you wearing right now : pjs and a fluffy leopard-print dressing gown bc i’m cold.

how tall are you? : 5'9+ so quite tall

piercings / tattoos? :  i just have my ears pierced, i don’t have any tattoos. too indecisive for that

glasses ? contacts? : no

last thing you ate? : chocolate easter egg i had somehow saved

favorite color(s) : pink

current obsession : not sure that i have just one specific obsession atm, more accurately too many which fight for my brain’s attention. playing piano, painting, astrology, hdm and taylor swift are a few currently, aside from writing.

any pets : two guinea pigs, pantalaimon (pan) and diego :’)

do you have a crush right now?: if my long list of adored, middle-aged, female actors count, then yes. 

favorite fictional character : marisa coulter, lyra belacqua, regina mills, esmé squalor...

last place you traveled : i travelled around the uk quite recently (york, oxford, etc.) the last place abroad i went was the us. planning to travel a bit more this summer (scotland, more of europe...)

tagged by: @toxicmalicex

tagging: anyone who would like to, feel free to tag me as ‘tagged by’ <3

#;;ooc #// i don't often do these so thought i would this time !

[silvertonguc]

toxicmalicex​:

the woman’s own lips pursed into a thin tight line. her child’s words seemed to cut right through the, so far, untouched hauberk, making her chest move faster with each heavier breath. the hurt tried to transform into something far more digestible — anger. so often had she allowed her misguided instincts affect her relationship with lyra. having taken her here by force, definitely one of them. however, she had bo further plan to follow. there was only so much she could do through the long days of keeping her daughter drugged, unconscious. now, that she’s let the sleeping effect to wear off, there was only one chance, one path to follow. for once, it was herself she had to control.  ❛ would you willingly let me take care of you ?  no, of course not… ❜  marisa put away a cup, the drugging tea the filling content. lyra’s combative attitude something she would have immediately put a stop to, but now her hands were tied. an attempt at letting go of all the control bound to end badly. nevertheless, she was forced to try.

marisa scooped closer, her fingers brushing lyra’s hair away from her face. the touch so feather light, but filled with longing and love she felt for the girl, her child. ❛ i’m… sorry for making you hate me so much.  for all the lies. for using force. but i’ve never lied about wanting nothing more than to protect you, my darling. there’s so much—— ❜  marisa sighed heavily and looked away. so many things that lyra didn’t know, so many questions she could have had but were left unanswered. so many paths to follow, but snuffed out like candle flames. wasted chances and opportunities. regrets and mistakes never to be repaired. ❛ there are things, lyra, you don’t understand. there are forces that would do anything to bring about your downfall. there are people who are determined to hurt you. i’m not your enemy. ❜

     witnessing transparent shift upon mrs. coulter’s expression, no matter how subtle, sent fierce wave of fleeting satisfaction flooding through lyra’s veins, fuelling her while in such vulnerable state. temporary though it was, for the shortest of moments, a sense of power, of fight, overwhelmed any fear once felt. of course, adrenaline faded, and quickly. the girl, who had been through more battles, both emotional and physical, than most her age, was not one to find glee in misfortune or pain of others, even when that ‘other’ was a woman as malicious as her own mother. “-- but i don’t need taking care of, why can’t you see that? i don’t need a mother to protect me. i always done just fine on my own. i had the master and the scholars and i got by just fine doin’ my own thing ... with rodger. now, i ... i have will and i have pan ...” whether trying to convince herself or her mother, lyra was not willing to decipher, but drew beloved daemon closer to her rapidly deflating form. any mention of rodger, along with current thoughts of will, wherever he might be, brought mostly sadness. 

     “you say you en’t my enemy...” how tired she was, voice lowering as previous rush of emotions gave way to dizzy, dreamlike feelings that left lyra wondering if she were truly awake after all, “yet you, and countless other adults like you, keep doin’ bad things ... to me, to others. i heard it all before, even from good people, about the forces and people out to hurt me, the things i ‘don’t understand’. well, nobody ever gave me chance to try.” so tired, the girl barely flinched upon the other’s gentle caress. unsettlingly, an urge to lean into comforting touch by someone so adamantly expressing love and care had to be fought against, while silently reminding source of weakened craving within never to trust her mother, no matter how exhausted she felt. after all, was she not the cause of her present state? “you never wanted me when i was born, why are you so interested now?”

#toxicmalicex #t;;34

[silvertonguc]

I do remember that, I'm sure... That's what I'd do in her place, if I had a child.

#;;album #//i weep

[silvertonguc]

3.01 | 3.02 HIS DARK MATERIALS

#;;album #hdmspoilers #spoilers