#... i should steal one from walmart lmao.

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#bahhh i need a new blender. #im supposed to be drinking protein/weight gain shakes buuuuuut #1: my insurance does not cover any of that #leading to 2: spending that much money on things that i hate but must drink twice a day makes me want to throw myself off a cliff. #so im making my own weight gain shakes LMAO i got the approved recipes&what not. #buuuuut now i need a blender. #... i should steal one from walmart lmao.

[shaftking]

https://jewish-harley-quinn.tumblr.com/post/693375193120489472/yeah-i-had-to-take-a-small-business-class-for-my

Jesus Christ… this post is so moronic. According to OP, capitalism promotes megacorps taking over. Isn’t that like the opposite of what it is? I literally learned this shit in 8th grade about monopolies and how they hurt small business, which were previously thriving due to competition and the free market. At least OP admits they’re an “anarcho-socialist” *cringes*…. I can just imagine these people stealing a pack of gum from Walmart or some shit and thinking they’re rebels against “the system” lmao. The shit idiot brain fungus is real.

Capitalism is just the free market and people being allowed to trade with each other and set their own prices and shit, corporations can exist within capitalism, but government policy often facilitates it through things like lobbying, licensing fees, etc.

As someone who has worked in a similar work environment to say, McDonald’s, the corporations are not the ones who get hurt when you steal from them. All that happens is the average worker is fired to both even the losses and because of company policy.

Excusing theft really is the most juvenile mindset and it’s why you have so many middle school communists who can’t see past their own nose who grow up to support anarcho socialism and other dogshit economic systems because for all their talk about “seeing the bigger picture” and caring about peoples wellbeing, they cannot understand why saying that “everyone should steal” is a bad idea that will lead to bad outcomes.

Like, no, Walmart the corporation doesn’t care about a single pack of gum, but if everyone went and just stole something every time they shopped in the place there would be much larger problems, not the least of all a society that is okay with stealing simply because you want it or because you think you’re sticking a middle finger to the man or whatever.

#ask

[kleptosuperstar]

hiii so uhh i really don't think anyone will see this because...i literally have one follower but im kinda making this for myself because me and my cousin are going to the mall and a few stores around the city in a few days SPECIFICALLY to lift and I made a list of things that we both want PLUS some tips for these stores seeing as I DO lift from most of them a lot sooo..yeah

SPENCERS: a moderately easy store seeing as there are TONS of blind spots and LP isn't employed. To top it off, cameras are never monitored, however they are low-hanging and somewhat high quality. Usually only 2-5 employees but the store is almost always crowded so if you find a blind spot it's a free for all. They wont chase but might call mall security.

What we want:

h20 piercing cleaner x2

toy cleaner

jojoba oil

hemp oil

septum and nose jewelery (we will actually have to purchase this, seeing as if you steal the jewelery they hand to you they WILL know you stole no matter what. Plus the packaging is riddled with RFID tags)

HOT TOPIC: Not that many blind spots, but employees usually don't care and rarely count clothing articles, which may have a tag or two, so check for those. Cameras are never monitored and the stores usually have a large layout so just watch out for customers and employees, find a blind spot and throw a bunch of shit into your bag They don't chase! :D.

What we want:

distressed thigh highs

over the knee thigh highs with bow

black fishnet lace thigh highs

black and white stripe arm warmers

black fishnet fingerless gloves

black floral tights

CLAIRE'S: whew lawd. I really really want to be helpful on this one but Claire's is a laughably easy place to lift from. No cameras, usually only 1 or 2 employees and if one is giving a piercing it's a free-for-all. THEY HAVE MIRRORS SO AVOID THOSE. My favorite blind spot there is behind the register if there is no one there, and that's all I have to say there.

What I want: (she doesn't want anything from Claire's apparently🙄)

Headphones

A tiara

Nail polish

VICTORIA'S SECRET: first of all lol, i feel ZERO shame in lifting from them. Please note that they do have cameras, and their SAs are trained to look out for shoplifters, however most of them are just confused college girls lol. Panties are NOT tagged. What I like to do is take a medium sized empty makeup bag and put it in my purse, and once I arrive to VS i put the makeup bag in the tote, I also drop my phone into the tote. I go around the store, picking out panties that are my size and i drop them so they can fall directly into the makeup bag. I do this with as many as I can fit into the bag and I do this with small makeup items as well. Once I'm done, I reach into the bag as if I'm looking for my phone (which i dropped in earlier) and that's the moment when i zip up the zipper of the makeup bag and pull out my phone immediately after and pretend to check the time and say something like "Damn, I gotta go. I'm late." Or something like that. Put the makeup bag in your purse and play around on your phone as you exit the store. And that's really it :) I rarely lift bras from there anymore so I can't REALLY help you there.

What I want:

a bunch of panties and some lip gloss!

BARNE'S AND NOBLES: I've never lifted from this place but I know friends who have. I'll give you the tips they gave me. There are cameras, and they are being monitored, but there are PLENTY of blind spots seeing as it is a very large store. The kid's section has no cameras tho, so if you're like me and look younger than you are, this could be for your advantage. No one expects you to steal when you're vibing in the kid's section. Most books have RFID tags, and hardcover books sometime have books engraved in the cover, so watch out for those. Most manga, some magazines, and just overall 99% of the books are tagged. Get what you want, flip through them and look for RFID tags while pretending to "read". If an employee sees you sitting down "reading" they won't suspect you unless they actually see you ripping out the tags. The worst that could happen is that they could ask you to move out of the book aisle so other customers can come through, if that happens, simply find another blind spot. Slip them into your bags like they're yours as SOON as you know they're rid of RFID tags. They won't chase, but probably will try to get you back into the store and if that doesn't work they'll try to get a license plate number or give your description to the police, neither usually goes anywhere tbh.

What we want:

fire force volume 1

fire force volume 2

fire force volume 3

fire force volume 4

Akame Ga Kill

Soul eater

Black lagoon

Kakegurui vol. 1

The seven deadly sins volume 1

Spy x family 1

Spy x family 2

Spy x family 3

Black butler vol. 1

Black butler vol. 2

Black butler vol. 3

Black butler vol. 4

Wotakoi vol. 1

Wotakoi vol. 2

Gangsta

Dictionary of witchcraft

The anatomy of the occult

Charms, spells, and formula

Moon spells

Gothic beauty magazine number 19

Nocturnal witchcraft

Necronomicon

The good witch's daily spellbook

A big book of practical spells

Any book on astrology

Gothic grimoire

Shingeki no Kyonin

Ulta: The second store I've ever lifted from. This store is easy, but not laughably. I feel like this would be a starter for babylifters. This store has mild LP, so watch out for those and NEVER EVER EVER conceal in front of customers, you should never do this in general but especially NOT in an Ulta. Get to your blindspot and make sure to detag depending on what you plan on lifting. Those mfs at Ulta tag like crazy. Put everything in your bag and remember to NEVER get too greedy at this store. They have a STRICT, VERY VERY STRICT no chase policy.

What we want:

better than sex mascara

lipstick

eyeshadow

makeup brushes

black liquid and stick liner

pink liquid liner (if they have it)

bronzer

brown eyeliner

eyeliner pencil

maracuja oil

any colorful eyeshadow pallate lol

WALMART: My walmart is so easy it hurts. Maybe about 5 cameras throughout the whole store to my knowledge, so the whole thing is basically a blind spot. The makeup aisle is heavily monitored tho so whenever I'm over there I make an effort to never look up to those cameras. Grab whatever you want/need and AVOID EMPLOYEES!!! they're everywhere. As well as customers. They are the two most annoying problems I've ever had lifting from a Walmart. I've noticed that aisles where you get things such as building materials are the most empty with no cameras. People usually only go to walmart because the food is cheap, so there are a lot of families who are usually only at one side of the store. Its rare that people ever need materials like those so seek out aisles like that to use as a blind spot. Wal-Mart doesn't seem to tag that many things, but ALWAYS check no matter what store you're at. If you're lifting something on the expensive side, just check for that.

What I want:

kinder buenos x2

sugar free monster energy

paint

paintbrushes

black lace

blue eyeliner

blush

nail polish

socks

THE DOLLAR TREE:

Pretty easy store tbh. The cameras are fake, and if they aren't they're never being monitored. I don't know about ALL layouts but mine has SO many blindspots it's crazy. If you're just looking for a snack, some makeup, or maybe a meal ? (Yes, you can get a whole meal if you lift enough stuff) then the dollar tree would be your place of interest. There are almost no employees walking around the store. There are usually only 2, and they switch between working at the registers and cleaning out the front of the store or whatever. Honestly this store is so easy just stuff shit in your bag lol. Even if you get caught they won't chase or call the police. Their stock is WAYY too cheap for that. I go there to steal candy or makeup brushes which is usually not worth paying for anyways so this is a beginner store. Knock yourself out ;)

What I want:

literally anything i see there that i want😭

welllll if you actually made it this far, thank you so much! I hope this helped someone and I hope one day I can make a master list of stores myself instead of just picking selective ones but this was all i was able to do :( i really REALLY hope this helped someone lmao just remember

✨ if its chain, its free reign✨

[rwbyremnants]

WARNINGS: roleplay, bondage, blindfolds, tickling, feet, undressing, shibari, dildo, first time, female ejaculation.

Hey guys, I know you came here for the smuts and I won't take up much of your time (or you can skip this author note, don't say you couldn't lmao). But there's a lot going on out there and it's pretty terrifying. If you aren't already doing all you can, visit this Black Lives Matter website for more information on what's up and how you can help. Thanks.

=Chapter 3

Little had seemed to change in the week following Ruby’s first encounter with Winter. She was still living with her dad, still trying to steal little Fènleng at every opportunity when she visited Yang and Weiss, and still searching for her own place.

Rather than return to the other side the country, Penny had opted to live with Ruby and Taiyang while they searched for jobs and apartments in Nashville, now that they had their degrees from university. As content with the arrangement the three of them were, there were many times when Taiyang would prove rather overbearing, often knocking on the door to check things were okay and ask if they wanted drinks, even when they had requested him not to.

Ruby had taken to her laptop once more, looking through various housing websites; just as she did every evening. "Hey, this apartment has two bedrooms, that looks nice!"

"I do not think we need two bedrooms," Penny mused as she sorted through the stack of job applications. They had sent resumes to several places online, but it didn't hurt to consider some minimum wage possibilities to tide them over financially. "Although, it might be nice to use the second one as an office, or a guest room…"

"Or when Fenny's a little older so she can sleep over, or we can get a green iguana and it could be its room, or we could just-" But the silence from Penny spoke volumes. Eventually Ruby stopped talking, looking back to the screen. "Rambling, sorry. But I'll keep looking!"

"You're fine, Ruby." It a simple statement, designed to let Ruby know that she had no problem with her rambling and no more. Then her curiosity got the better of her. "Why a green iguana?"

"Well, have you seen them? I think they'd be so much more interesting than a cat. Not that cats aren't cool, though!" Looking through more of the site's choices, her face seemed to light up yet again at another choice. "Hey, this one here looks really good! And it's in the middle of the city close to the-"

But right away, Ruby stopped. She had been about to admit it was close to The Clamp, the club which Blake had first taken her to when she was exploring. But at last minute, she remembered Penny didn't want to hear about such things. “Theeeee ice cream bar I like… yeah…"

Ruby's strange tone of voice did draw Penny's gaze up, but she hadn't quite caught on what she was trying to avoid mentioning. "There's an ice cream bar you like in midtown? Excellent. You'll have to take me there sometime."

"Huh? O-Oh… Yeah! Sure! Great." Now that had gotten her into a sticky situation. She'd need to find an ice cream bar in the middle of town now. There was certainly no way she could take Penny anywhere near The Clamp. Eventually she turned her chair to face her, leaving her house hunting for later. "How's your job search going?"

"Not great," she sighed, glancing between her own laptop and the papers. "But I have completed a few of these applications. Maybe an exciting beginning in the Walmart industry will be in my future."

"Well, anything is something! I have my savings for a deposit for a place, so we're not in too much trouble if we can't find anything." As always, Ruby was optimistic. She moved over to sit next to Penny on the bed and rested her head against her shoulder. It was a habit of Ruby's, leaning over to watch her as she browsed online.

The arm not occupied with the touchpad reached around to squeeze Ruby closer. She didn't even have to concentrate on doing it, so often did this habit come up. "What do you think about me trying to sell people phones?"

"Like at a kiosk or whatever?" she asked, looking to the job application she had open. A typical highstreet phone store needing another representative. "Sure! I think it'd pay better then Walmart, plus you get to be the one to tell people what's what."

"Indeed! I am satisfied with our current phone plan, but if they offer an employee discount… who knows?" Just then, she heard the telltale jingle of Ruby's default ringtone. That meant it wasn't Yang or Weiss, and obviously not Penny. "Oh, that's funny; we're talking about phones, and yours is ringing! How coincidental."

"Oop, so it is!" Pulling it from her pocket to check who it was, Ruby's face froze a moment. In plain view of Penny, the contact name was 'Winter'. "Oh… One sec."

“Sure,” Penny said in a casual tone. Though her eyes were wide, curious about Ruby’s behaviour.

Untangling herself from Penny's side, she stood again, pacing back toward her chair so she was a small distance from her girlfriend. Mainly for her benefit, and so she couldn't hear Winter should she start dirty talking straightaway. "Hello?"

"What are you wearing?" came the tinny voice, sultry and husky.

Yep, there it was. All that was missing was some cheesy saxophone music in the background and she could have been a late-night commercial for phone sex operators. Ruby's face lit a bright red, eyes as big as dinner plates as she looked back toward Penny for a split second, and then toward the ground as she talked in a hushed tone.

"You can't ask that right outta the gate! What if I was in public?!"

But Winter was already laughing. "You didn't actually have to answer, I was kidding. I'm sorry."

"Well, I would have answered anyway, but I’m not exactly alone." Glancing back at Penny for a moment, she gave a small grin to try and apologise, before looking away. "Penny and I were looking at apartments."

"Ahh." The voice sounded apologetic. "She… does know about our arrangement, doesn't she? I think you told me she does, but I want to make sure. I can be more discreet about contacting you if you need me to."

"No, she does! We just haven’t talked about the nitty gritty details, but she knows it's a thing. In fact…" Covering the phone for a moment, she looked toward Penny instead to ask. "Are you okay with me taking this in here? Or do you want me to leave the room?"

Though Penny did look vaguely uncomfortable, she smiled and said, "It's fine. We're all adults here." She hesitated, then added, "Tell Winter I say 'hello'."

"I'll make it up to you when we're done." Ruby assured with a warm smile, before turning back the other way to talk back to Winter again. "Yeah she's fine. She says hi, by the way!"

"And the same back to her," Winter chuckled. "I suppose I did call out of the blue so I should get to the point. I was wondering if you'd be available for a session tomorrow evening. Say, around six?"

"Tomorrow? I don't think I have anything planned. Lemme just double check," Yet again she covered the phone, and looked right back at Penny. "We have nothing going on tomorrow evening, right? I don't think your dads are here ‘til next week, are they?"

"Nope," Penny said easily. "You can set up an… appointment for tomorrow. I don't mind." Her smile was still a little awkward, but she wasn’t at all outraged or overly disgusted.

"Alrighty." Back to the phone again, she smiled. "Sure, I'm free! Guessing you managed to get rid of your roomie for a bit?"

"Indeed. In fact… I felt a bit regretful that you had to leave so late last time that I've arranged for my 'roomie' not to come back until late the next day. This way, you can sleep here if you're too exhausted to move afterward. And if it's alright with Penny, of course."

The implication was clear; Winter intended to really put Ruby through her paces in one way or another. And that idea was making Ruby blush yet again. Last time already seemed crazy to her! She didn't even know she was ready for more just yet. Swallowing, she nodded. "Cool, sounds good. You didn't have to go through all that trouble though, I don't mind."

"Too late," she told her carelessly. "But honestly, it's fine. So, can I expect you at six? That will give us time to stop and have a drink beforehand again. That seemed to help you de-stress a bit."

"Yeah, six sounds great. I'll ask about sleeping over as well, but it should be fine. I'll see you then!"

And with that, she hung up the call, tucking her phone away in her pocket, before she looked over toward Penny again. Despite her being alright with their arrangement, clearly stating she had no problems, Ruby still felt guilty about leaving her. She needed that reassurance.

"Are you definitely okay with this?"

Penny didn't look quite as easy-going as she did a moment before. "Well… alright. I suppose there isn't any harm, but I'm going to miss you while you're over there."

"I can stay." Immediately, she took her seat back next to her again, wrapping her arms around her and cuddling closely. "Or come back after, whatever you want. I mean it, if you want me to stop then you're totally okay in asking me to."

"I don't. I want you to enjoy sex. Since I do not, it's only logical for you to find somebody who can fill that need." After a breath, she added quite calmly, "Sleeping over there… isn't the same, but it also makes sense from a practical standpoint. You're already there, and doing something that's very… physically demanding. Even getting dressed and hailing a cab would be inconvenient, nevermind driving yourself home."

"There's a little drinking involved so I won't be driving." As if that would somehow make things better. But Ruby only continued to cuddle into her side, delivering a kiss to her cheek before she nuzzled against her neck. "But for real, if you don't want me sleeping there, I won't. I'll Uber it back home to snuggle with you. Because I'd rather you be happy than me have convenience."

"Honestly, it's fine. It's just less of a 'sex only' arrangement, that's all." She turned her sparkling green eyes on Ruby for a moment, gaze level and unflinching. "But I would appreciate you letting me know if things become romantic between you and Winter. Not that it will mean our relationship ends automatically; I can share you. But I won't share you without being aware of it."

"I don't want you to share me," Ruby insisted, looking back into the dazzling eyes of her loved one with honesty as she took her hand in her own, running her thumb over the top of it. "You're the one I want to spend my life with, not Winter. I promise that."

That brought an easy smile to Penny's face, and she leaned over to kiss her lips with great relish. "Not that I was worried about you leaving me, Ruby. I think we know each other well enough by now."

Then, uncharacteristically for the libido-less girl, she allowed herself something like a lewd smile. On anyone else, it would have just looked mischievous, but for Penny, she was practically winking and nudging Ruby in the ribs.

"Have fun with your playdate tomorrow, okay?"

Rolling her eyes, Ruby gave a warm smile back as she squeezed Penny once more. "I will, I'm sure. But for tonight…" She drew herself away, holding the top of Penny's laptop screen for a moment as though she were about to close it. "How about we go to bed early and snuggle up with a few episodes of Doctor Who?"

The smile turned joyful, and she placed her own hand on the side to help swing the laptop shut. "That sounds excellent! I think I've done all I can here, anyway. Shall we order a pizza?"

"You read my mind! Nothing to stop us having a really quiet, relaxing evening to ourselves."

At least, that was what Ruby thought. Until there was a knock at the door, and the voice of her father calling through, "Ruby, could you take Zwei on his evening walk? Make sure to take a bag!"

"…Nothing but picking up dog poop, I guess. Whee…"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This time, Winter was a lot more nervous about the things she had set up for Ruby's arrival. In most situations, she had a firm grasp of the scene they were setting up; how things would go, and what would be involved. What their roles would be. This time, she was operating with partial information, most of which had been hastily researched specifically for their evening. She had to hope for the best, and that she had not jumbled up anything in her mind.

When she heard the doorbell, she shouted, "COMING!" from the bedroom as she made sure a few last things were set up, glanced at the spare outfit hanging from the back of the door, and at the other one in the bathroom as she passed. Then she nodded to herself as she swept through the house to the front door, took a deep breath, and eased it open.

"Sorry I'm a little late!" Ruby hastily tucked a strand of hair behind her ear again. Once more, she sported the black and red skirt, only with a black tank top to go with it this time. Just the thing for the summer heat. But that didn't stop the knee high boots she always wore from making a second appearance. It was a little more casual than the first evening, a sign of Ruby's growing confidence; but still enough to show she made an effort. "The Uber driver took me the wrong way to try and charge me more, the jerk. He’s getting a frowny-face review."

"No, no, you're right on time," Winter chuckled. She herself was wearing a pencil skirt and a light blouse; a bit dressed up for their evening in, but nothing terribly fancy. "Really, if you came when we said, I'd have still been rushing around setting things up."

"Oh… Well, okay! It all worked out for the best then!" Ruby grinned, taking a few steps into the apartment so Winter could lock the door behind them both. Yet another evening with the building to themselves, thanks to Winter's mysterious roommate disappearing for the night. Strange how Ruby had never met them.

Pacing toward the sofa, she asked, "Oh, am I okay to take my boots off? They're clean, but just in case."

"Hm? Oh, please, make yourself comfortable! Do you want some help?" She gestured to the sofa, which would make a prime spot to shed the boots either way.

"Nah, I got it!" She took a seat at the sofa right away, unzipping her boots to place them one side of the table. Once more she was hearing the calming sound of the well-contained waterfall in the corner, a relaxing ambiance. "So…" Ruby began, sitting back in the chair. "Are we having a drink first again? Or going straight to it?"

"Whatever you like." She gestured toward the kitchen. "This time, I've made sure I have a few easy-to-microwave snacks on hand, if you're hungry. Much as I loved eating dinner with you last time, I… didn't want to assume you were after a longer 'date'. Especially if you wanted to get straight to it. Do you?"

"Huh… Well…" Slowly shrugging her shoulders, Ruby weighed up the options. The way she saw it, it was no different to the times back in college where her and her dorm friends would have a meal together before spending the evening playing games. Winter was a friend, nothing more, nothing less. "Snacks sound great! So we can chill."

A pleasant smile spread across her face, almost one of relief. "Good. That's… that's good. Well, I don't know how you feel about spinach-artichoke dip and pita bread, but I do have other options if that doesn't sound appetizing to you."

"Hey, I’m game!" She tried her best to sound genuine. In truth, anything to do with vegetables wasn't the most pleasing of things to Ruby. But for Winter, she would make an effort. The least she could do was try it and then have another option should she not like it. Plus, they had drinks. "Got anymore of that strawberry ale? That was really nice."

"Restocked it just for you," Winter said over her shoulder as she went into the kitchen.

As it turned out, the dip with pita bread turned out to be a rather pleasant snack. That alongside some mozzarella sticks made for a wonderful snacky meal between them, accompanied with light conversation and one or two drinks to get them feeling at ease with one another. Both had began chatting about various subjects together; work, living at home, even Zwei.

But as they got down to the last of the bread, the subject had changed to college stories. This one in particular, an embarrassing tale about how Ruby managed to walk in on one of her dorm-mates. "All I wanted to get was my DVDs back, I didn't expect to walk in on Pyrrha pinning her boyfriend against the wall! Ever since then, I made sure to knock a lot louder if Jaune was ever over."

"Goodness!" Winter chuckled, wiping a drip of hummus from the corner of her mouth. "Sounds like a disaster narrowly averted to me!" Sighing, she thought that over for a moment before saying, "I wish I had an experience like that. My university was here, so there was no need to live in the dorms."

"Oh it was a blast! Even if me and Penny weren't typical sex-crazed dopes, we all had good laughs. And teased each other whenever we could. Pyrrha and Jaune never lived that down, I’ll put it that way." She continued to giggle to herself, finishing off the last bite quickly once finished with the tale. But just before she took a swig of ale to wash it down, she laughed and added, "I think Jaune was more worried we were gonna tell people that he was clearly the bottom, fragile masculinity and all that."

"Oh? Interesting…" Her head tilted to one side - a bit more than it would have done without the pair of martinis she'd ingested. "Have you ever wondered how it is that… I mean, look around you. I'm your Dom, Blake and Sun go to the club, too… Qrow was there the once. You ended up having quite a few kinky people around you, even though it's not a very typical 'hobby' to have. Isn't that funny?"

Finishing up the last swig of ale, she nodded as she put the glass down. "Yeah! It's a crazy world… maybe kinky people all just gravitate towards one another without realising or something. Who knows?"

"Could very well be," she admitted as she glanced at the half-empty container of dip. "Now then. I have a little something special planned for this evening, but we don't have to get to it right away. What would you like to do next?"

"Special?" That piqued Ruby's interest. Special like the costume Winter had prepared last time? Possibly something on those lines, given the rather mischievous look on her face. Giving a small smile of her own, she crossed her legs. "What kinda ‘special’ are we talking?"

It seemed Ruby was ready to progress their evening. Waggling her empty glass back and forth a few times, Winter then set it down and stood. "If you're ready…?"

"I can be.” Standing and holding a hand out toward her, she said, "Lead the way."

Down the hallway they went to the three doors that branched off to both bedrooms and the bathroom. However, instead of opening the door to her room, Winter gestured to the loo.

"You'll find a change of clothes in there," she told her sub formally. "By the time you've changed, I will have, too - but please knock just in case."

"Alrighty; I'm meeting you in your bedroom, right?" she asked, opening the door to the bathroom and about to step inside, though she lingered around for Winter's answer. She had to double check.

"You are. See you sooooon…" The last syllable was drawn out as Winter waved at her, a twinkle in her eye. With a sly wink of her own, Ruby entered the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind her. For a moment, she had to giggle to herself as she stood against the door, composing herself.

A special surprise, huh? I wonder what it could be. Looking to the towel hangers in the room, she spotted something that could be what Winter had in mind. A long, black robe hanging from one of them, hanging alongside a school uniform. When she walked over to inspect it, she found there was more to it; specifically, an emblem on one of the pockets.

"Hufflepuff! Wait… Is this an official robe?!" It was. Ruby knew rather well how expensive some of the merchandise could be, but Winter had bought her an official Harry Potter robe regardless. Her house, too! She also clearly expected her to wear it for their session today, however, which lead Ruby to wonder… what could the evening possibly entail?

Doing as asked, Ruby slipped off her clothes and put on the robes. Taking a moment to neaten up her appearance in the mirror, she was satisfied and ready to go, leaping out of the bathroom with excitement. Once at Winter's door, she gave a quick knock.

"You may enter."

When Ruby did, she beheld a room completely transformed. A curtain hid the bed entirely from view, and everything else… it looked straight off the sets of the movies. Fake wood paneling covered the floor, a huge old steamer trunk sat nearby, and dark-hued tapestries and paintings did a fantastic job of hiding the normally-pristine walls. There were a couple of very authentic-looking school satchels propped against the wall, and right in the center…

"There you are," Winter said without looking up from the bubbling cauldron set in the middle of the floor. She, too, was dressed in a similar outfit, although finished off with knee-high black stockings and brown shoes. Her own colours were the blue-and-bronze of Ravenclaw, and she was, indeed, flicking a thin wand over the top of the "potion" she had brewing. "I thought your detention would be finished hours ago."

"Holy…" Ruby took a moment to look around in awe. How on earth did Winter manage to do all this on her own? And it was all for her; a fantasy from her favourite books, all hers to live out. She really was someone who went all in to impress their partners, it seemed. Quickly remembering she had a role to play, she stood upright and looked right toward Winter again rather than the look of the room. She could focus on being thunderstruck later.

"U-uh, yes! Well… Lockhart had me signing a bunch of fanmail… it took a long time, got super boring."

"Sounds as if it would be. Oh, and this owl came for you…" She handed over an envelope, one made of yellowed parchment. The address on it was her actual home address, but it was written in calligraphy.

"Oh, thanks!" Taking it from her, Ruby took a moment to inspect the beautiful handwriting. Even just the envelope was a sight to see, and they had barely started! As she gently broke the wax seal at the back, she leant forward to ask out of character before she read what was inside, "Can I keep the envelope?"

"Of course, since it is yours," Winter said in an impatient tone… one that seemed to be equal parts Hermione and McGonagall. The letter read:

Welcome to Hogwarts! Hopefully you can forgive me if I mess up something here or there, you know this is all new territory for me. But I did a fair amount of research; I am a professional! There was a winky face there, which was such an odd thing to see in calligraphy that Ruby had to giggle. Today's safeword is "Muggle." Please do not be afraid to use it, either just to tell me you prefer or don't prefer something, or because you don't want to continue this scene. Otherwise, I'm going to continue to behave as if this is all very real, and you will do the same.

Have fun! -Princess

Muggle, huh? Ruby thought to herself. She really has done her research. This was exciting! A real practice this time, where only that word was her safety net. Ruby was determined to make the most of this new role and play along - not to mention curious to see just how much research Winter had done.

To test, she tried a simple question: "So what's a Ravenclaw doing outside their dorm past curfew?"

The look she fixed Ruby with was withering. "You're the one that needs tutoring with potions, Rose. But if you'd prefer I go back to my own rooms…" She began to move as if to stand up.

"O-oh I… Um, yes! Guess I do," she admitted instead, wandering over to the boiling cauldron. How was Winter keeping it bubbling like that? She didn’t feel much heat. There were so many questions, but it was all as magical as the book world Winter attempted to recreate.

"Good. Now… this Disappearing Solution is through the first phase of ingredients. What's next, do you remember?" Winter's free hand gestured to a carrying case of fake potions ingredients that stood open nearby. Most of the tiny phials looked like they simply held coloured sand or beads, but it was enough to complete the look.

"Disappearing solution? Hmm…" If that was from the books, she couldn’t remember it. Maybe it didn’t matter. Straightening her glasses for a moment, she looked to the “ingredients” Winter had prepared, wondering what would create the better effect for the boiling liquid. In the end, she went for the green food colouring.

"I believe it's goblin’s blood next, right?"

"Exactly," Winter said with a grin. "Go on and add it - not too much, though."

Opening the phial, she allowed a couple of drops to enter the cauldron. Just as she anticipated, it was the right amount to change the colour of the water, to show she'd achieved the goal. Satisfied, she grinned. "Done! And it didn't blow up this time!"

Her Ravenclaw tutor had to suppress a laugh at this, but she managed. "Very good, yes. You'll get an A in Potions yet."

Of course, she meant this to sound complimentary, but she didn't know that an "O" was the most desired grade. Ruby was quick to point it out, chuckling to herself as she reached for a flask of yellow sand to keep herself temporarily occupied. "Don't you mean an O, miss? That's what I hope to get." But, she couldn't help but smirk, muttering to herself under her breath, "In more ways than one…"

Winter scowled at her. "What did I tell you about correcting me while I'm tutoring? That's one punishment you've earned when we're through… keep it up, and I'll add a few more." Clearing her throat, she recomposed herself and consulted the large, old book beneath her. It looked to be some kind of encyclopaedia volume or an atlas in which she had stuck a few pages of notes in the centre. "Now… we let this simmer for two minutes, then add… what, Rose?"

"Sorry miss! We add… U-uh…" No doubt Winter would want to add more and more punishments to the list, and in truth, Ruby was rather curious about that prospect. What kind of punishments would a Hogwarts tutor exactly use? Holding up the flask of sand to her view, she shrugged her shoulders. "Powdered Mandrake, miss?"

Winter pursed her lips, as if deciding to be mean on purpose, or to be more fair. "Very good," she finally said. "But I would hope you'd remember it faster than that by now. Well, go on, shake it in there."

"O-oop! Right!" Taking off the cap, Ruby added a much larger amount of sand to the mixture than she did with the colouring, seeing how it mixed in with the water below. Two ingredients down; how many more was Winter willing to add? But then she thought of something else she could do, and grasped the wooden spoon that rested to one side, giving the “potion” a good stirring for a while to make sure the sand mixed well.

"Gently!" she was warned, with the wand pointed at her. "You don't want to go too fast, or you'll set it off again! Honestly, you're a hazard to our health!"

"S-sorry, Mistress! I thought it would be more viscous." She tried to play along. Once satisfied, she allowed the potion to settle before reaching back to the pack of supplies once more. Perhaps Winter would want other conversations to keep them going, and to stick to the theme. "So… I hear you're doing well in Charms? That's pretty good to hear."

"Potionus Brewus," she said to the cauldron as she waved her wand over it - then sticking her tongue out at Ruby, a briefly out-of-character moment. They both knew that wasn't anything like a spell from the movies or books. "Yes, indeed; the professor says I'm getting top marks. I heard you're improving in there, too."

Having to suppress a laugh of her own, Ruby continued to stand upright as she nodded to her tutor, taking a fake feather from the pack. One that had obviously been painted to look like it belonged to Fawkes, the phoenix from the movie. As she held it above the mixture a moment, she smiled. "Yes! It's probably my better subject. That and Care of Magical Creatures."

"Oh! Don't add that!" Winter warned her with wide eyes, the other hand coming up as if to stop her. "A feather would upset the balance! Ruby, what are you thinking?!"

So she was going to be a little mean. Bringing her hand away from the potion again, she held the feather still in her hand, keeping it still. "But, I thought a few strands from a phoenix feather give it that longer lasting effect? It's better than troll hairs, right?"

"Yes, longer lasting, but only in the hands of an experienced witch! If we do anything slightly off, it will go up in our faces! Again!" Sighing, she snatched the feather away, pointing it at Ruby. "That's two punishments. You know we aren't ready to begin messing with the ingredients list, we're only fifth years!"

So they were in the same year in this scenario? Interesting. It was all little things for Ruby to play with in their fantasy together, things she could use in conversation. Deep down, Ruby would be more than happy to roleplay an entire scene without the sexual part, to live in one of her favourite fantasies for an evening. But the prospect of more sex, if it was going to be as amazing as last time, made it better.

"Well, what would you do to finish it?!" she asked, putting her hands on her hips. "It's not my fault I'm trying new things!"

Rolling her eyes, Winter sighed, "How is it not your fault when you're the one doing it? You sound like a Slytherin." Her head nodded to the phials. "Just use the troll hairs. We're not trying to impress anyone, just getting it done so we know what we're doing in class."

"Alright, alright!" She finally rolled her eyes, collecting one of the phials Winter had prepared. This one seemed to be a few trimmings of her own silver strands of hair, only a few inches long each. Probably from a recent haircut that she had saved specifically for this event. Taking the cork out from the bottle, she poured its contents straight in with the rest of the mixture, before taking the spoon once more to stir.

"That's better." After a few minutes, she sighed and eased her legs apart, moving them off to one side instead of folded up together. "So… how are things with that girl in your dormitory going? The redhead who looks like a Weasley."

"Oh you mean Pe- The Polendina girl?" Maybe that would be a better way to keep up their illusions. Unable to help herself, she smiled happily at the mention of her name, taking the spoon out from the potion and lightly tapping the few drops off of it. "Well, not too bad. But I think she's still a bit anxious towards me. She was startled when I told her I was sleeping in your dorm."

Glancing around with an alarmed expression, Winter hissed with a finger up to her lips. "Shhh! We don't want that getting around, do we?" Clearing her throat, she set down the wand to smooth down her blouse and necktie. "Alright. This is nearly done, so… would you like to mark the results down?"

Her hands moved to one of the satchels and pulled out a ladle and a large potion bottle, complete with stopper. With a mildly disinterested look, she nodded at a roll of parchment, a quill, and a bottle of ink that lay near the potions ingredients.

"Yes, yes of course, Mistress." That name seemed to be an odd habit. Mistress. It suited her well enough, even if not for this particular role. Still, there hadn't been a complaint yet. Taking the roll of paper and the quill, she dipped it into the inkwell, about to press it into the page, when realising she hadn't a clue how to write that neatly. "Um…" she muttered to herself, still paused with the long feather in her hand, trying to hide the drops of ink that splattered on the page by writing as best she could. Which unfortunately, was very messy.

As Winter blew across the liquid resting in the ladle, waiting for it to cool off to put it in the bottle, she glanced at the page and winced. "Dreadful. No wonder I'm always fixing your essays." Then she poured it in and stoppered it. "There, this is for you to turn in tomorrow. I'll pour one for myself."

"Sorry," she muttered again, finishing up the last few words before she took the bottle to set near her paper. All there and ready to go for their “lesson” at a later date.

"Good, Rose. That's brilliant. Now…" Glancing up as she turned down the burner under the cauldron, she favoured Ruby with a smile. "Are you ready for your punishments now, or will you take them later?"

A good question again. Two punishments awaited Ruby at some point, and the more she thought on it, the more excited she was to discover what they would be. Biting her lip with a smile, she shrugged her shoulders again. "Right now will do, Mistress."

Stoppering her own potion bottle, Winter chuckled to herself as she tucked it into the ingredients case and closed it. "I see. In that case… I think it's time we practice a little spellwork, don't you?"

With careful attention, she began to move the cauldron and the burner it sat upon closer to the wall, to give them more room. Ruby could now see that Winter had been sitting on the cord that led to the nearest outlet. Not quite as magical as anticipated it seemed. But it was probably for the best that the burner was switched off before they got into play. A fire would be one of the worst distractions. Focusing her attention back on Winter again, she stood upright, quickly adjusting her glasses once more.

"What kind of spells?"

"Funny you should ask…" Only briefly checking the pages in the middle of the book again, she swished the wand at Ruby and cried, "Petrificus totallus!"

Ruby knew a lot of the spells by heart – including the petrifying curse. She immediately stood straight, arms flat against her body. Taking a very quick glance just to check there was nothing presenting a danger behind her, she then allowed herself to fall back, falling to the ground with a FLUMP!

"Shit!" Winter breathed very quietly at the sound of her hitting the floor, but then cleared her throat. "Good, good. That will help with the punishments a lot." A smirk touched her lips. "Blink twice if you can understand me."

"Owie…" Ruby couldn't help but whisper to herself, slightly shocked at how the fall had hurt. But it wasn't serious at all. And within a few seconds, she looked up toward Winter again, blinking twice as commanded.

"Excellent. You are now at my mercy, Rose." Walking around her on a slow circle, she granted an occasional view up her skirt.

The lack of underwear was enticing. Something Ruby hadn't expected. She couldn't help herself, eyes following as she paced slowly around her, until the naughty sight was no longer visible. Then her focus went back to Winter's face. But rather noticeably, her cheeks were redder than before as she tried to lay as still and stiff as possible.

"Let's just… yes, I think that would do nicely for a start." Squatting down - and again, presenting Ruby with a brief flash of flesh before her legs were in the way again - Winter rolled Ruby over onto her stomach. Still having to remain stiff, Ruby allowed for Winter to manipulate her in this way, curling her hands into tight fists. Something to keep her focused for the time being.

Once she was face down and secure in that position, there came the sound of Winter rummaging in one of the satchels. When she approached again, she said in a clear voice, "And now… Incarcerous."

The spell was accompanied by the feeling of something slithering over Ruby's bare calf. Something thin, but made of a type of fabric.

"Hmm?!" Unable to see what was happening, or even ask, Ruby was forced to put up with whatever Winter intended for her. Feeling the strange fabric seeming to crawl over her legs sent a small shudder up her back, making her bite her lips to try and suppress any sounds.

Now that the effect had been established, the work had to be done. Next, Ruby could feel a long, thin rod being pushed under her arms and stomach; it felt similar to the material that had teased the backs of her legs, but not quite the same. Then a thick knot of what was surely… rope. It had to be rope, there wasn't much else it could be; a thin cord maybe half an inch thick, at the most. Blinking in shock, Ruby had no choice but to be bound. It wasn't just to hold her steady, it had a pretty appearance, too.

Once Winter was done, Ruby was still left on the floor in her previous position, waiting patiently for Winter to lift the first spell. However, she did not… quite yet, anyway. Instead, there was another muttered spell: "Obscuro."

This time, thin fabric slid down over Ruby's eyes from above, settling into place and blocking out all light. Blindfolds as well?! Winter really was going all out with her new sub this evening. Now Ruby couldn't move, even if she tried to! What else could Winter possibly have in store? A gag?

No. They hadn't established a signal for that. Winter wouldn't make things that extreme just yet; they would need to build toward it. That came with just as much relief as it did disappointment, but perhaps some day…

"There," she sighed, trailing the very tip of the wand up and down the back of Ruby's thigh. Tying her up had bunched the back of her robes off to one side, which looked quite awkward but did at least reveal more of her shapely legs. "Now then… Finite petrificus."

Finally she was allowed to relax her body. And she did so, first by testing the bindings; pulling this way and that, she struggled against them as much as she could, discovering they were holding well. Now she really was at Winter's mercy.

"Oi!" she called out, struggling again. "Are you mad?! What if Filch catches us?"

"Shhhhh!" Winter warned her. "Or else I'll use a…" Another pause to glance at the book. She really was trying her best, even if she hadn't quite memorized every detail she would need. "Langlock on you!"

That shut Ruby up. Trying to look toward Winter as best she could, she struggled against the bonds on her hands again. More than anything, it was to make a show for Winter, to display how helpless she was. Something she hoped she would like. "What are you gonna do to me?"

A low chuckle floated out as she grasped Ruby's ankles and raised them up. "Well, first I have to finish what I couldn't with you stiff as a board like that." Then she began to tie the ropes around her ankles, much in the same fashion she had done around her sides and wrists. They actually connected to the tie around her wrists, in fact.

What an embarrassingly compromising position! Any effort to move her hand would surely result in exposing more of herself, revealing her in the process. Even if she was still wearing her underwear, it wasn't exactly something she wanted to display so easily. Wriggling again once it was tied, she turned her head toward Winter.

"I-it feels… good, Mistress."

At that, Winter frowned, but it was clearly a theatrical one. "Aww, what kind of punishment is it if it feels good? Oh well… guess we'll have to move on to the next one." More rummaging sounds came from nearby.

"Oh, I-I mean, u-uh…" Ruby stuttered. She meant to try and please her master, not further annoy her into making more punishments for her! Still trying to look around foolishly, she listened carefully for what her mistress was doing, unable to hear anything she could identify.

"Are you ready, Rose?" Winter demanded as she drew closer again.

And then came the feeling of her socks being pulled off. Seemed she had no choice but to see what Winter had in store for her. Swallowing, she whispered, "Yes."

There was a brief pause, and a quiet chuckle to herself. Then Winter bellowed, "Rictusempra!"

And without a second's delay, suddenly light, teasing sensations were sliding up and down the sides of her legs, over the soles of her feet, even briefly over her wrists and knuckles.

"Wha-haha! Hahahaha! Hehe hahaaaa!" Right away, Ruby was laughing and giggling loudly, reduced to a squirming mess on Winter's bedroom floor. She couldn't escape it! Whatever Winter was using for her spell was tickling her most sensitive areas, making it difficult to focus on anything else.

"Ahhh, this seems to be doing the trick!" Winter cackled as half of the sensation moved to the back of Ruby's neck, while the rest continued to slide from ankles to knees.

"Hahaha! No! S-stop! Hahahaha!" But from the silly grin on her face and the immense laughter, it was unsure to tell if Ruby really did want her to stop or not. She continued to squirm as best she could, trying to shrug her shoulders to keep Winter away from her neck, but failing miserably. She could do nothing about any of it but squirm, and wait till Winter was done.

Or use their safeword... but no, she didn’t want to chicken out. Not just yet and not so easily.

"Oooh, I think I- I mean, the spell has found the parts where Ruby Rose is most ticklish!" A little giggle followed as the teasing bits poked into her ear briefly, but only for a second before returning to the back of her neck. Meanwhile, the other half returned to her toes, swishing back and forth at a rapid pace.

"Hehehe! Nooo! I-it hahahaha I-it's too, haha! Much!!!" But Ruby was absolutely powerless, no matter how much she wriggled away from it. It just kept coming, over and over again, making it difficult to keep talking at all. She felt her toes flexing, fists clenching to try and hold on.

After another few seconds that felt like an eternity to the poor girl, Winter said in a bemused voice, "Finite Rictusempra." The sensations all fell away. "I may have to use that one on you again; it's great fun, and great practice."

It took a few extra seconds for the sensations to die down, and the poor girl to go slack. Finally she could lay against the floor and catch her breath, panting heavily to do just that. Whatever Winter used to tickle her certainly did the trick.

"Goodness me," Winter said, in the "Hogwarts Student" accent and tone she had been using most of their play. "I didn't think that would have that great of an effect on you, Rose! How do you feel?"

Ruby eventually tried to look back toward her again, giving a small smile and a nod back at her, and attempting to make a thumbs up gesture with her hand. While she was still breathless, it was just enough to assure she was feeling alright enough to continue, just exhausted from the tickling.

"Ooh, glad to hear that. Do you want to feel… better?" The question was vague, but had a distinct implication of what kind of "better" Winter might have meant. As she asked that, the thin, cold length of her wand passed up and down the outside of Ruby's calf. Thankfully, it wasn't the same type of sensation she'd just put up with moments before.

"B-better?" she finally had the breath to ask, leaning to try and look toward where Winter was touching. Not to much use at all. She assumed Winter was using a wand, given the texture of it, but couldn't be too sure. Whatever it as, it felt good to give her the attention she craved. She wanted more. "Yes, I.. I think so."

The sensation moved down until it was trailing over the backs of Ruby's thighs, over each inch with the lightest touch. Eventually, that meant pushing her skirt upward along with it. There was a light gasp from Ruby as she was being exposed all the more to Winter, able to feel the cool air caressing her thighs right up to her rear cheeks. Something sharp and warm closed around the blade of her foot as what was presumably the wand kept taunting the back of her thighs.

Had Winter just… bit her foot? The "Mmmm" that vibrated against the skin would seem to suggest she really had. Unable to help herself, Ruby curled her toes again to test the sensations. Sharp teeth were still present, biting against her flesh. Why Winter would be so interested in one of her feet was beyond the Hufflepuff girl. But it was happening, and not too unpleasant, either.

Then she could feel the wand right against the lining of her undies, causing yet another gasp. Noticing the gasp, Winter answered it - for what turned out to be the wrong reason. "Sorry, just watching these wiggle around during the Tickling Jinx… I felt like a cat watching a mouse try to escape. Made me want to attack."

Another bite, this one softer, just in case Ruby had not enjoyed the first as much as she let on. But yet again, Ruby wriggled her toes back and forth against the sensation. It was certainly interesting, and if Winter enjoyed it, she couldn't argue. In fact…

"Does Mistress like my feet?" she asked, trying to suppress a giggle.

"How dare you accuse me of that, Rose!" Winter cried out, again in her "Hogwarts" accent. Then, playing it up for effect, she pitched her voice so that it would sound very slightly nervous, combined with a lot of budding desire. "I wouldn't… like such a thing…" Lips grazed over the sole near where teeth had just clamped down moments before.

A small smirk graced Ruby's lips again as she waved her toes, very gently moving her feet back and forth. "It feels like you do… Is that a kiss I feel there?"

Unbeknownst to the tied-up girl, the blush that crept into Winter's cheeks was not at all staged. Not so much because of the topic, but because Ruby had discovered one of her secret kinks: a sub teasing her as a Dom.

"N-no," she breathed, kissing again, and harder. "This… it isn't what you think, you silly Hufflepuff…"

"I think it iiiis," Ruby continued, and once again wriggled her feet in a teasing manner, curling her toes on occasion. "I think you're a foot worshiper, aren't you?"

The teasing was working far more than Ruby knew. Her cheek nuzzled the wiggling toes as she breathed, "Stop, you… you can't know that…"

Obviously, she wasn't very convincing, so she decided to try to distract Ruby by pressing the wand inward against her centre again.

There was another small gasp inward as Ruby felt herself getting touched directly. Right against her panties with the wand, and it was so hard! An unfortunate side effect was how it made her think of possible other things that could go in there… Such thoughts were making her grow warmer, wetter. She found herself biting her lip, trying to suppress a moan.

"You like that, don't you?" Winter breathed, turning the teasing around on her sub now as she rubbed the wandtip up and down her sensitive lips through the thin material. "You like it when I expelliarmus your panties off."

"I… don't think that's how the spell works," she commented, but continued to squirm under Winter's movements, trying to shuffle herself away from the wand for the sake of her dignity. An attempt that failed miserably.

"I think it is." Of course, Winter didn't know for sure, but for the moment it didn't matter. "And… I think it's time we go a little further, don't you? I can't leave you tied up all day long." Her lips quirked. "Or…. can I?"

There was no response to that, other than Ruby clearly swallowing. There were advantages to her remaining tied for the evening; Winter would have full control, Ruby would simply have to go with the flow. But the disadvantage of remaining tied was that Ruby would still be clothed. It would be rather difficult for Winter to do anything to her.

"In fact… I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere. Oh, wait…"

And there was a strain of light laughter as all pressures disappeared from the rest of Ruby's body, and she heard shoes clopping away from her.

"Huh? Mistress? …Winter?!" Upon hearing Winter walk away, she tried to look around yet again. Curse that blindfold! There was no way Winter would just leave her tied up and sightless, was there?!

Apparently, there was. The room was entirely silent for about five minutes; not even the sound of a ticking clock to break up the silence. There were distant sounds in the rest of the apartment, so at least she knew Winter was still around there somewhere.

"…Great."

Left in a compromising position, bound and blind, Ruby had no choice but to wait out her time. Shuffling yet again, the bounds held tight. Escaping that way was out. She could attempt to yell out the safeword… "No, she has the room soundproofed. She wouldn't be able to hear me." There wasn't anything she could do, other than try and get comfortable and await her master's return.

"Ahhhh," Winter sighed softly as she reentered the room. "There's my favourite pupil, right where I left her. So patient!" The voice grew closer, and to one side of Ruby. "Did you have a nice break?"

"Winter?!" It was as though Ruby was barely able to believe she'd got back from the shocked tone of voice. Squirming yet again against the bonds, she groaned, "That wasn't funny! You just left!"

A hand patted her backside - perhaps a little harder than was necessary, but still nowhere near a spanking. "You were fine, I'm sure. And I brought you a little treat, too…"

"What if I needed the bathroom, or had a panic atta- wait, a treat?" she asked, yet again making a futile attempt to look.

"Yes," Winter cooed. "A treat for Rose. Here, I'll give you a hint…"

And suddenly, there was a sharp, ice-cold sensation directly between her thighs. Not quite high enough to reach anywhere more sensitive, but not far off, either.

"HAAAAH!" Yet again, Ruby tried to shuffle herself forward and away, squirming almost as much as she had when she was tickled. "What the heck is that?!"

"The question is, do you like it?" The object turned very slowly, and that revealed that it was round. Also, wet; she could feel moisture running down the inside of her legs to the floor.

"It's freezing!" Ruby truly hadn't a clue what was being placed on her skin. The more it turned, the colder it was. There was no way that she could get away from it. "Seriously, what is it?!"

Giggling, the object was removed and brought around to Ruby's face, and chill, smooth glass was pressed up against her lips. "I fetched you some refreshment."

"God, it was freezing…" Ruby continued to comment, although when feeling the edge of it touch her lips she puckered them ready to take a sip, waiting for Winter to pour it gently. So Winter tipped it up for her, the other hand pressing gently against her forehead to help her head remain upright while she swallowed.

"Do you like?"

Taking a few sips from the glass, she welcomed the strange gingery flavour, with a hint of cream. It was a flavour she didn't recognise, but a good one. Finally trying to turn to one side once she'd had enough, she sighed. "That was nice, actually."

"A little butterbeer to quench your thirst."

Then soft lips were replacing the mouth of the bottle, pressing in so gently it was almost as if they weren't there. Relishing in the small kiss for a moment, Ruby hummed contentedly. And then realised; Butterbeer! That had to be imported either from Florida or from the UK studios. Winter really got some just for her to try? How much was her master willing to spend on her sub?

When their lips parted again, Winter whispered, "Fancy any more, Rose? Or do you want to be out of these ropes quicker? Your choice."

Again, the choice. She could be out of the ropes at last, to be free to either end their play there or finish in a simple manner. Or, they could make things more intense. Once again, she got thinking; what if she wasn't wearing clothes under the ropes? What if she was tied and naked, an item for Winter to just freely use? It was an exciting thought, one that brought all the more heat to her sex. Her Dom hadn't even seen her naked properly – not yet. But that didn't stop Ruby from egging her on.

"Don't suppose you have a spell to get me naked in these ropes, do you?"

"Hmm…" A few seconds ticked by with Winter thinking that proposition over. Then she leaned down and whispered, "Muggle," before slightly peeling up one side of Ruby's blindfold so she could see her.

Finally she could see. Blinking to adjust to the light again, Ruby made eye contact with her Dom, tilting her head questioningly. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no," Winter assured her immediately with a gentle smile. "But I wanted to ask… would you rather we stop this play and strip you? Or do you want 'Winter the Ravenclaw' to be more hardline with you and tell you 'no'? I have… ideas for either choice." That word being stressed made it sound an awful lot like Winter wasn't bluffing.

"Ideas?" It certainly got Ruby's attention. If she had plans either way, then there was nothing to lose. What did Ruby want? Truthfully, she wanted to remain in the fantasy world they had created. To be the small, helpless student at the mercy of her Ravenclaw tutor. Perhaps not a teacher, but it was close enough to her darkest fantasy; she could pretend. Biting her lip, she smirked mischievously.

"Well… I do like Winter the Ravenclaw…"

Chuckling at the impish grin on her sub’s face, the Dom traced her fingertips through Ruby’s hair. “Maybe we can reach a compromise. What if we keep the scene ‘paused’, and I untie you and strip you as quick as I can? Then we’ll ‘unpause’, and act as if it’s all been a spell to undress you.”

That was exactly what Ruby wanted. There would be no way they could actually remove clothes through the bindings, but it would be the closest thing to her potential fantasy. A brief moment to simply set things up for the next scene. Giving a nod, she tried to shuffle her hands again.

"Sounds good. You don't have to tie me back up as pretty as this if you don't want to."

"Oh, I'm a shibari master," Winter informed her. "Without feigning the spellwork, I could redo that in five minutes or less. But I also have some other apparatus with which to hogtie you again if you'd rather not wait."

"You really do have everything here!" Ruby teased, flexing her fingers slightly as Winter began to loosen what was on her. Finally her arms were freed, then she moved on to her feet. Shrugging her shoulders, Ruby smiled. "I gotta admit, I'm curious. But I think going back to the ropes would be better for the pausing thing."

"We can do that another time. I mean, if you're still enjoying our arrangement." As her hands raised up and began helping Ruby remove her "uniform", she added, "Believe me, I have an entire closet full of possibilities, and a fairly empty social calendar in the evenings and on weekends. There will be time."

"As long as your roomie's okay with it." Ruby continued to help with removing her clothes, unbuttoning her shirt gradually for her pleasure. Although, while they were on that subject… "How come they aren't here, anyways?"

"Out making themselves scarce." When Ruby only quirked an eyebrow, she snorted, "They know what I get up to here, and that under those circumstances, I appreciate having the place to myself. Don't worry, no one's going to bust in on us."

Smirking again, she gave a rather taunting wink back to Winter. "Do they have this sort of arrangement with you?"

Luckily for both of them, at that exact second, Winter had been about to undo the black-and-yellow necktie from around Ruby's collar. Instead, she grasped it and jerked her forward so their bodies were flush with each other. She gazed straight into her silver eyes.

"That… would be asking me to breach a Dom-sub nondisclosure agreement. And you wouldn't do that… would you, Lady?"

The mischief vanished. All Ruby could do was look back into Winter's eyes with a mixture of fear and arousal. She really did have her wrapped around her little finger. "N-no, ma'am! Sorry!"

But in a way, it answered her question. Otherwise Winter would have outright said no, rather than calmly avoid the question. But there was a new question she now asked herself out of curiosity: was Winter a Dom or a sub with this mysterious roommate?

"You're forgiven." She kissed Ruby's nose briefly. "And no harm done. I just don't want you prying into that kind of thing too much, or getting into the habit of doing it at the Clamp, either. It's… impolite, and could get you hurt if you do it to just the wrong person."

"Okay. Understood, yeah… won't do that," she backtracked, sliding off her skirt and tossing it aside. It was a fair point on Winter's part that she shouldn't pry into people's business. Anyone could be dating anyone, for numerous reasons. It wasn't for Ruby to know, and she had to protect them as much as she would want to be protected.

Moving on to the task she was looking forward to, but equally nervous about, she reached her hands behind her to the straps of her bra. Pulling it together to prise it free, she allowed it to slide off her arms, revealing her modest chest to Winter. Releasing the necktie, having opted not to take it off after all, Winter reached down and traced her fingertips around either side of the erect little peaks.

"Ohhh… have I told you lately how much I enjoy your form? All of it… and I'm straight six days of the week!"

"I guess I'll have to note down Wednesday is your gay day." Ruby giggled to herself at that little joke. But the hands on her chest were irresistible. She found herself having to lean forward against them, smiling contentedly when soft thumbs moved over the tips. So soft, even when she was at her mercy.

"Guess you will." Her smile slipped on one side. "Actually, I'm sorry you haven't been here in a couple of weeks; I was waiting for some of these supplies to come in. Plus there was a lot going on at the office."

"It's fine! Don't worry about it." Taking a moment to stand still and recover, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and added, "I can imagine things are hectic right now with Fènleng on the scene. Yang mentioned they've had a few people at their door asking dumb questions so I can't imagine how much more you've had if you're the middle man."

"It's…" Winter reconsidered what she had been about to say, hands pausing on Ruby's stomach. "Well, not exactly a 'PR nightmare', but it's made a lot more work for us. But that's shop talk, and you're here to play." Her hands glided around the waist, index fingers dipping just under Ruby's waistband.

"Yeah but, we're paused." She held onto Winter's hands for a moment to stop her, looking up into her eyes to catch her attention. "You can talk to me, y’know. I'm not just a sub, I wanna be a friend to you, as well."

For whatever reason, the insistence from Ruby made the taller woman blink down at her with some surprise. "Of course you aren't just a sub. At the very least, you're my sister-in-law. But even more…" Her fingers came up to caress the soft apple cheek of the girl in front of her. "You're already my friend. Just a… new one."

Smiling back gratefully, Ruby allowed one of her hands to hold Winter's against her cheek still, leaning in against it. "Good. So if you want to talk about whatever, we can."

Is this delving into romantic territory? she thought to herself. That was one of the major rules Penny had against their arrangement. No romance; at least, not without telling her. And though she insisted it wouldn't happen, here she was - just about naked, looking up affectionately to Winter. In a very similar manner she would with Penny. Was it a step too far?

Perhaps Winter had recognized that, as well, because she smiled a bit wider and gave Ruby a light kiss on the forehead; one more like Yang would give her than Penny. Obviously, it was a move to tone down the emotional vibe between them. "No, no, I'm finished. It's nothing I can't handle." Then she reached the other hand down to squeeze Ruby's backside. "I'm much more interested in finishing our scene than rehashing crap from the office."

"Oooh…" Clenching her rear muscle slightly against the hand, Ruby purred with surprise. But alas, she too was far more interested in reaching the end of their play than anything else. That didn't mean she wasn't going to ask later, though. "Alrighty." Finally letting to of Winter's hands, she smiled mischievously again. "I believe you were removing my undies?"

"Yes. Let me see you stripped." The fingertips raised up again, pulling at the waistband until it began to slip downward. Ruby was prepared for this; below she was freshly trimmed, making everything neat and tidy for her Dom. Assisting further, Ruby stepped out the underwear once she'd lowered them enough, letting Winter place them with the rest of her clothes.

Then for the last item. Her glasses. Taking them off and folding them neatly, she quickly leant over to put them down on one of Winter's desks. That was something she couldn't risk throwing among the pile.

"You could have left them on," Winter chuckled softly, eyes sliding up and down her flawless form. "The whole 'Potter' thing. But it's okay if you don't want to have them in harm's way, should things get… vigorous."

"Yeah, was kinda worried about it." Though stepping away from Winter again, she reached to pick up one of the ropes on the floor, innocently handing it toward her. "Speaking of which…?"

A wicked grin flashed across her face. "Ohhh, I am gonna enjoy this."

And she did. In a matter of minutes, she had Ruby hogtied on the floor again, the ropes tied in such intricate, visually appealing patterns up the front of her, above and below her breasts… around her hips, ankles, wrists. Everything was tight, but not so tight that it would be uncomfortable or cut off her circulation. She really had done this many times… or had it done to herself many times, at the least.

Right away Ruby assumed her role, faking a nervousness in her voice. "I can't believe you’ve done this! How can you be sure Filch won't walk in?"

"Because I magically locked the door!" Winter snapped, walking around Ruby in a circle now. Completely missing Ruby’s meme reference. "But of course, we both know you don't mind this as much as you're pretending! Isn't that right, Rose?!"

Struggling again against the bonds, she looked toward her master once more. Still slightly nervous, but more excited about what was to come. Winter was right. "I'm not giving you that satisfaction!" she shouted back, tugging at her ankles. "Not when I could tease you more!"

And Winter's eyes flicked toward the ankles and back. "Hah! As if that's…" Another flick. "Stop changing the subject! I have you tied up, and I'm going to make sure you remember it!"

Yet again, Ruby curled her toes and flicked her ankles again, smirking to herself. Even in character, it was beginning to grow more obvious just how well it was working, how attracted to her body Winter was. This really was a “gay day”.

"Oh I'll remember," she goaded. "I'll remember how much you can't resist me!"

After a second, Winter whispered under her breath, "Damn. Forgot to put the blindfold back." She bent over at the waist and quickly tugged it into place, then breathed, "Sorry," before straightening again.

"Ow!" With how quickly she tied it she had managed to catch a few strands of hair. But it was enough that could be ignored. Besides, she knew she was obviously getting to her master. "You really do, huh?" She grinned. "Wow, I never expected how much you did!"

"Do what?" Winter hedged, back in her "Hogwarts" accent once again now that she had fixed that minor mistake. "Do want to tease my trussed up turkey?"

So it wasn't working anymore. Growing nervous again, the grin was slowly vanishing from her face, where she bit her lips nervously instead. "A-and how… how will you do that?"

Satisfied that her ploy to distract Ruby had worked, both in and out of character, Winter chuckled. "Oh, I have a special spell for that…" There was the sound of rooting through a satchel once more, then a page being turned nearby. When she returned, she knelt by Ruby's side, seemingly ready to proceed.

"Are you ready for the ultimate in witchcraft?" Even to her own ears, the line sounded silly, but she hoped her sub wouldn't mind too much.

Swallowing, said sub leant her head against the ground and resigned herself. Winter was going to have her way, and there was nothing she could do to stop her. No more teasing. Eventually she nodded, waiting for what she would do. "Yes."

"Good. First… Engorgio!" Of course, there was no actual sound of the spell taking effect, but Winter paused as if there were. Then she breathed, "Now, we are ready."

An instant later, something textured and semi-firm was brushing up and down the insides of Ruby's thighs. Suddenly Ruby's muscles tensed up again. That felt a lot thicker than her wand did… Maybe Ruby's idea that Winter would use some kind of object to tease her wasn't so far fetched after all. And that spell…

"What is that?" she asked. "Why does it need to be bigger?"

"It's something just for my Rose," Winter cooed, trailing it higher and higher until it was within a hair's breadth of her moistened lips. "She's going to take it… ohhh, she's going to take it deep."

Clenching her muscles closed again instinctively, her eyes opened wide behind the blindfold. There really was something going inside her tonight. Something big, and as she said, something that would get deep. Biting her lip nervously, she shuddered at the thought.

"O-oh… wait, be careful! I've never, um, had anything that big before!"

As it began to edge its way between the folds, Winter cooed, "First time for everything. And you can't do a thing to stop me, tied up like you are…" As it delved a little further in, she continued to taunt her. "You don't want me to stop anyway, do you? Yes… yes, you're really looking forward to this. To me opening you up."

Feeling it right against her lips had her breath quickening. And Ruby wasn’t lying; she really hadn't had anything too big inside her body. Nothing bigger than two fingers, at least. And from the feel of whatever Winter had, this was going to be a fair bit bigger. Would it cause damage if Winter rammed it inside so quickly?

Biting her lip nervously, she had to call up out of character, "Winter, I'm serious. Just… Go slow? At first?"

"I'll do what I want, you Hufflepuff!" Winter snapped. But the latter was clearly added to remind Ruby that they were, after all, still playing out a scene. At the same time, the object ceased its slow, inward progress and instead began to shift back and forth very slightly.

Ruby gasped shakily. This was really happening! And by Winter's gradual pace, it was going to head deeper and deeper, even if not right away.

After another moment of teasing her body, preparing her, it began to push in again - and there was more resistance. Winter seemed to hesitate, then placed a hand on Ruby's shoulder, stroking up and down for a moment. She was waiting for a signal; should she continue, or did Ruby not want what was about to happen to happen under these unusual circumstances?

But there was no response from Ruby. She seemed unaware of what was truly happening within her body. What was being pushed against. That was until Winter pushed a little more, and could feel something give. And that something had her wincing fairly loudly. A sharp, intense pain, like something had torn.

"Muggle! Muggle!!"

The presence inside of her vanished, and Winter pulled up the blindfold, cradling her face in both hands. "Are you alright?!" she demanded the instant they could establish eye contact.

Ruby’s legs closed tightly, eyes clenching shut still as she bore the pain. Already she could feel her eyes watering, but she held herself back. She couldn't cry in front of her dom, that would ruin everything! "What the heck was that?! It felt good, then… then something felt weird, and it really hurt, I just freaked out!"

"Why didn't you tell me?!" Winter snapped, somewhere between angry and sad. "I'd never have done it this way if I had known – you should have disclosed to me before we ever had our first scene!"

"I did!" She finally managed to open her watery eyes again, still holding herself back. It was more from that sudden pain than truly feeling sad. "I said I'd never had anything that big! I didn't know taking things bigger would hurt!"

"Then you… really didn’t- alright." Sighing, she pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get upset, but… it's unusual that you would have taken anything in without clipping the hymen. But now it's done, so… so there's no use in crying over spilled milk."

Oh… THAT'S what that was, she thought to herself, sniffling as she looked back down toward the ground. No wonder Winter was so upset that she didn't know; it was something that no one could give her back. Blinking a few times to try and clear her tears, Ruby shook her head again before she looked back up to her.

"Sorry, I had… I had no idea. Like, I thought that only- I d-don’t know what I thought. Sounds like my school's sex ed fucking sucked, huh?"

But of course, Winter saw the sparkle of wetness on her eyelashes, and frowned further. "God, Ruby… I would have done this so differently. If I did it at all! I should have- well, I say I should have looked, but that would be pretty strange. I'm not your gynecologist." She traced her fingernails through Ruby's hair. "Are you okay, though? Do you need me to untie you?"

She shook her head again. "No! No I don't want that. I mean…" For a moment, she looked to one side, instinctively leaning her head against the hand that was fussing through her hair. Even when her hands a moment ago were teasing and enticing her, they did just as good a job at calming her right down, relaxing her.

"I was really enjoying it. So hot, even if kinda weird. I just… I didn't know it would hurt that much. Will it still hurt? Or is… that it now?"

"It might still be a little sensitive," Winter admitted. "But the worst of it will be over now. I'm so sorry this had to happen this way, with you tied up, and…" Bending low, she kissed the top of Ruby's head. "Virginity is such an overrated thing, anyway. It doesn't matter in the slightest. What matters is if you're enjoying yourself."

"Well, I've heard of people ripping theirs when riding horses and stuff. That's why I guess I kinda assumed I didn't have one or something, with me and Penny doing stuff in the past…" But after a short while, she finally parted her legs again, into the same position they once were. And with a small nod, she smiled. "I do wanna keep going, though."

A very soft laugh floated out of Winter's throat, betrayed as it was by her sad eyes. "You're a real trooper, Ruby Rose. And… when we're finished with our scene, I have a treat for you - not a 'Lady' treat, but something I think you'll like." Clearing her throat, she leaned down to kiss her head again before reaching up to the blindfold. "Ready to begin?"

That made everything all the more sweeter. Winter wasn't angry with her after all; that enough was plenty of relief for the smaller girl. As things went, it was probably the best outcome for the loss of something so intimate. Even if it wasn't Penny, it was someone she trusted deeply. Trusted so much, she wanted to continue until the end. Nodding, she smiled.

"Ready."

"Okay." The blindfold came down to eclipse her vision again. Seconds later, she whispered, "Begin play" for good measure.

"Alright, Rose," the colder voice snapped as the foreign object began to push its way into her once more. "I'm about to change your entire world."

Yet again, her breath quickened. In the blink of an eye, Winter could go from a calming presence to a merciless Dom. It was something she adored, but also feared at the same time. Winter truly was a mystery. Biting her lip as the object slid past her defenses, she took another breath in preparation. .

And this time, it wasn't stopping, even if the pace was as gradual as before. Moreso, in fact; Winter seemed to have taken Ruby's newly-discarded virginity into consideration, even if her character did not.

"Ooh, look at you taking all of this… every last inch of it. You really were dying to have me invade you, weren't you? Such a naughty Hufflepuff."

When it slid past the point that hurt last time, there was a small shudder that went through her body. But not one of pain. One of pleasure. One that was made so obvious when she looked outward blankly against the blindfold, moaning out rather quietly.

Humming with satisfaction, Winter manoeuvred herself around to one side, positioning herself with her head just above where her wrists and ankles were hogtied so that her arm could get a better angle. As could her vision; looking straight down, she was just able to glimpse what she was doing to Ruby's sensitive sex.

And within a few more seconds… "There. All the way filled. How does that feel?"

"It's so big…" she half-whispered, half-moaned. Whatever Winter had used to fill her insides truly was larger than anything she had ever taken. And when she tested it by clenching her muscles even tighter against it, she found herself moaning outward again, arms quivering in pleasure. Which in turn, caused her ankles to twitch, as well.

Which Winter did notice, but she was determined to ignore. That was a separate play for a separate occasion; Ruby was experiencing being filled for the first time, and it was her duty to make sure the orgasm was one of the best she'd ever had.

"Do you like it this big?" Winter demanded of her, turning the thick shape within her very slowly. "Does it touch you in ways you didn't think you could be touched?"

"Oooohhh…" she strained out once again. It truly was teasing her in all the right places! And as she rotated the object, it was touching all the more of her, brushing against her inner walls in new and insane ways. "Yes!" she moaned, clenching her muscles down onto the object. "God, it really does, Mistress!"

"Good," Winter cooed, bringing it around to the original position. Then she began to slowly pull it back out of her. Inwardly, she hoped Ruby would say something if this was moving too fast, but her Dom persona certainly wouldn't stop to ask at that juncture.

It certainly wasn't. The sub found herself missing the sensation of being filled again. She wanted it back in there, back deep. Was something wrong with her to crave something so depraved? If there was, she didn't care right now. Especially not when she made a silly attempt to move back against the object.

However, unbeknownst to Ruby, her Dom didn't think it was silly at all. It filled her with a tingling of lust to see the girl, newly christened a woman, so eager to participate and enjoy these foreign sensations. So she slowly began to ease it back inward - though it was a fair bit faster than the time previous.

Yet again, there was another strained moan. Feeling it re-enter after a brief period away was so good! Far better than she ever expected it to be! And with the speed growing even faster than it had before, it hit all new places, teased all new parts of her. She loved it. Maybe she really was growing more corrupt, craving more obscene things for her body.

As she watched Ruby writhe below her, Winter held onto her shin with the free hand, to steady both of them. With more leverage now, she began to push it in and out of Ruby at a faster pace, listening to the sounds it was beginning to create.

"She's so wet," Winter cooed at her sub. "Wet and ready. Mmm, next time I'll have to drink her… bottle her up as a potion, perhaps." A particularly jerky thrust, just for variety. "A potion of lust."

"Hah… Ah…" The moans were continuous now. As Winter continued at a faster pace, her callings of pleasure were syncing up perfectly – a melody to rival that of her Dom's sister's singing, all summoned by the movements of that object pumping in and out of her. She no longer cared what it was, just that it wouldn't stop. Not until she got the finish she was craving.

As Ruby writhed and moaned, enjoying the pounding that was heightening her pleasure with every pass, Winter found herself with a small, unexpected problem. There really was no other way for her to continue to do what she was doing, no other angle from which to best deflower her – not without rolling her over, anyway, and that would be too painful on the poor girl's limbs. Therefore…

She was stuck face-to-feet, staring at what Ruby had been using to tease her earlier. Not glancing at them very often was working so far, but the faster she slid her instrument of pleasure in and out of Ruby, the more the toes curled and uncurled. Would they prove impossible to ignore, after all?

"Oooohh!" And that got particularly worse when Winter hit one spot. When she angled against her spine slightly, something felt even better than before, causing Ruby to yell out in even louder pleasure. She was already beginning to sweat before, but this was making her fists clench… and toes curl in as tightly as they could.

Hot breath caressed over Ruby's ankles as Winter began to feel the effects of her exertion, having to thrust into her over and over with the as-yet-unnamed object. She may have been in fantastic shape, but even she would sweat during a workout. And bringing her sub off definitely qualified.

"Do you… like it right there?" she asked, trying to replicate the effect with her next thrust.

Thankfully, it did. Rather perfectly, in fact, as the poor erstwhile virgin called out once more, growling with delight. "Yes!" she called loudly, grinning with glee. "Yes! Oh Winter, again!"

"Yeah! Yeah, that's right, again!" Licking her lips, she leaned even further down to better angle her shoulder, so she could deliver the maximum thrust possible once they really got going…

And felt a big toe writhing back and forth against her cheek. How was she supposed to ignore Ruby being so cute and squirmy? This really was testing her limits as a Dom; it was part of the reason she preferred to be on the receiving end most of the time. Temptation was hard to fight.

Something else was growing hard to fight, as well. Ruby's overwhelming need for her finish. To further tease Winter, though not with her intent, her trussed legs were beginning to shudder and quiver right by Winter, toes vibrating again right by her cheeks. "W-winter!" she called again, allowing herself another moment to moan. "I-I'm so close… I-I'm gonna- ah!"

The temptation would not win; Winter loved seeing and feeling the wriggling toes, but she could resist that long. It was easy. She was nothing if not professional. "That's it, Rose! Let it happen; let me conjure your orgasm here and now! Shout for me, squirm and shout! Be a good little Hufflepuff!"

All Ruby had to do was clamp her muscles onto the object again, and she was done for. The Hufflepuff turned into a quivering, shuddering mess on the ground as she called out loudly, straining against the ropes as her muscles pulsed with pure joy. As expected, her last little occurrence when she finished was not a one off. Being laid on her stomach, any of the fluid she secreted went straight against the ground, the ropes, or on the object; coating it with a different kind of fluid. It was far beyond her control.

And though Ruby could not see it, Winter was watching all the while, eyes wide. However, rather than being revolted, she was smiling, mouth very slightly open. What a glorious sight! Knowing her sub's climax was so powerful she couldn't help but squirt that way filled her with pride. A job well done.

Top marks.

#Lady Stardust #ruby x winter #rwby fanfiction #rwby smut #rwbyremnants #nsfw-Text

[sierrabinondo]

woodland creatures tour - day 5 (jacksonville)

day 5 was the last day we would spend in florida. i was actually really enjoying it down here and would have loved to stay longer. when we were planning this run i really wanted to do all florida shows but we couldn’t afford the extra mileage that would add to our van rental and in hindsight i think that still going to the carolinas was a good move.

i’m so glad this next gig was so close though, because we could still enjoy our time in orlando for a little bit longer. apparently we needed to check out of the airbnb by 10 or the host would charge us $20 for every like 5 minutes we kept the cleaning ladies waiting outside. so we hauled ass and then decided on a breakfast spot for everyone to go to. i really didn’t want to go to a chain restaurant. after a little bit of searching i found keke’s breakfast cafe, which seemed like a local franchise. had good reviews and looked interesting so we took a chance. i think this was the first like meal we all sat down and had together all of tour. we talked about anime while we waited for our food to come. we ate probably the best breakfast all of tour. my omelette was pretty damn good. santino ordered pancakes and i’m pretty sure they were the fluffiest ones we’ve ever had. 

if anyone knows me they know that i love food. once my mind is set on eating something i will literally not rest until i’ve had it. and for the entirety of our time in florida i DESPERATLEY WANTED ICE CREAM. i couldn’t find an ice cream spot on the other side of disney springs we ended up on after my lunch with eton and jeri so we left without ice cream. and i wanted ice cream really badly lmao. apparently, you can still go hang out at the disney resorts even if you don’t have a reservation. that was what all the disney blogs said. so i suggested a quick pit stop at the polynesian for dole whip before we hit the road for jacksonville. the guys were cool with it but it actually took much longer than it should have so it led to a chain of unfortunate events that i will divulge on later. at the time it was fine.

when i’ve stayed at disney i’ve only stayed at the port orleans resorts (which are BEAUTIFUL), and the last time was at a huge condo off the resort. the polynesian is one of the most expensive disney hotels you can stay at. we pull up and at first the security guard doesn’t let us in. i peered my head out the driver’s side window to let her know that we were here because we wanted dole whip lmao. i must have conveyed well enough that we aren’t a threat because she let us through. the resort is soooooo beautiful. and it was so nice out so it was nice to walk around. we had to walk quite a bit to get to the dole whip stand and luckily there wasn’t a wait. 

i don’t understand why it was my first time finally having dole whip when it’s always been available to me every time i’ve gone to disney??? but holy shit it was so tasty. i got the pineapple/vanilla swirl. i would have gotten something more elaborate but i was still about to consume dairy the day of a show which is already risky for me haha. joe got a float, i tried a sip and it was so good. i think kris just got pineapple soft serve. it was such an amazing snack while we were sitting there in the heat. i felt pretty damn good.

we then left for jacksonville and what was supposed to be a 2 hour drive turned into 3. that tends to happen (normally we account for this) due to pee breaks and a stop or two for gas. we ended up arriving to the hotel waaaaaay later than we were supposed to, around 5 pm. i still needed to shower, run to walmart to get antacid medicine, and we STILL needed to eat. we needed to load in no later than 7 for the show. i started to get really anxious. i knew there was nothing i could do but i went into panic mode. 

we check into the hotel, which actually seems OKAY at first. the girl at the counter is pleasant and complimenting me on my hair while she checks us in. but all i could think of was how fast i was going to throw down my bags and go pick up the tofu stir fry i ordered. i don’t get the luxury of just waiting until we get to the venue to eat because the sooner i eat the less likely my throat will be shitty when i have to sing. so i run to walmart to get my meds and then pick up my food. i went to walmart alone which was ill-advised. for the first time in ages i get cat-called. i know i was wearing shorts that made my non-existent butt look good but i walk around like that all the time and don’t get harassed, ever. the dude didn’t just say “what’s up”. he was like “ooooooOOOOOOOH hey girl what’s UPPPP that booty (yes he literally said ‘booty’) lookin FINE as HELL. what’s up??? how you doin??? what’s up??” like............would not shut up. i just looked down and sped inside the walmart, it looked like he was loading his bags into a car and i assumed he would be gone by the time i came back outside.

nope.

i called jeremiah for when the harassment continued lmao, i was just like “please stay on the phone with me until this is over, in case something happens to me.” i was livid. i go pick up the food while having a quick call to catch up with jeremiah and then i returned to the hotel. and i really thought the misery would end there. but i come back to the room to find out that there are BUGS ALL OVER THE FUCKING WALLS and PUBES IN THE SHOWER. i marched back to the concierge and told that girl in front of a family she had JUST checked in that our room had bugs and pubes. i felt bad for putting that on her but i was furious. she gets us a new room that is still pretty sketchy looking, but we do a check and it’s not in nearly as bad of shape as the other room.

i don’t even get time to shower, i just quickly rinse and shave. i didn’t even get to really do my makeup, i just like touched up whatever was on from this morning and inhaled my stir fry. at least the food was good. pulses. is hitting up the tour chat because they arrived before us (where’s the surprise lol) and they kept saying THERE WAS A DOG AT THE VENUE WHOSE NAME WAS ALSO SIERRA. so whereas this show seemed like it was going to be the least attended i was still pretty damn excited. they also said it was even smaller than will’s pub. i wondered how small they could mean, haha. but yeah. it was small! but! it was in a really cool little bar. there was a beautiful outdoor area with graffiti and the inside was definitely small but it’s not like we were bringing out 30 heads. it ended up working out fine. with the help of one of the locals named adult life, we moved the tables outside to allow for more room. 

adult life kindly hopped on the show a few days prior when one of the locals bailed. they were a really tight, awesome punk band that sounded awesome. i did like this weird like nod or like verbal acknowledgement when i saw the vocalist outside warming up lmao it was something like “MY MAN” and i immediately regretted being a fucking weirdo hahahaha. they covered dog days by florence it was so cool. i really enjoyed their set. most importantly they drove alllll the way out from orlando to play with us on a work night which we all immensely appreciated. they were awesome to talk to and it was great to meet them. 

while i believe like only 6 people came to this show, the jacksonville crowd was one of the highest quality audiences we played to. everyone was dancing and being really into both our sets, it was cool. i noticed they knew all the words to pulses. songs!!! i always think about how cool it is that if you can get one or two people to dig your music outside your friends circle, it just means that there are infinitely more people out there like them who would come through too, if they knew about your band. 

little did i know that more weirdness was unraveling after our set. i notice some guy is chatting up my bandmates as they’re loading up the van. i was outside when he says “oh so i own a couple buildings in the area, this one across the street and two down the road (something like that). i have a couple of employees inside getting a drink, i’m just waiting for them.” ????????? so weird. there’s like a total of 5 people inside that weren’t there for the show, or already working for the bar, and there was no way they were with this guy. the math didn’t add up. but i bopped back inside to go watch the last band, digdog. 

digdog ripped. they called themselves party prog and i absolutely back that statement. a really interesting mix of punk and prog music. not like new prog, but like rush and yes maybe??? whatever! they were great!!! really entertaining guys. super nice, too. my bandmates were still outside and i wanted them to come inside and watch so i was blowing up our van’s group chat. i shut off my internet cause my phone was dying and i figured they’d eventually come inside. after like ten minutes, only kris comes inside and no one else. i was like “??????” so my phone dies while we’re watching digdog. and after digdog finishes playing, we’re packing up merch, and my bandmates finally come back to explain to me that the reason why they stayed outside by the van is because that sketchy guy that was chatting them up was conspiring to rob us!!!!!! he started to ask them questions about where we were staying and where we were from. they didn’t want to leave our shit until the guy was gone. oh my god i didn’t even think of the possibility that someone might try to follow us back to the hotel and steal our gear. we’ve been sooo lucky, and we haven’t been robbed on tour. yet. lmao 

all in all, jacksonville was definitely a good time but very weird. if we come back (and we would like to!) we will definitely be on our toes lmao. 

oh. and we still found a roach in our room the next day. roaches are the devil i know (had them for years at the apartment in asbury) but that still sucks. don’t stay at the hospitality inn jacksonville!!!!!!!!!!

#woodland creatures tour

[greengay]

lol you guys are acting as if this is a deep friendship and kat has been signing her instagram posts with "heil hitler" and that billie should have known!!!11!!

this is like. a celebrity friendship. they probably hang out maybe once every couple years and it isn't Immidiately Recognizable that kat is allegedly anti semitic

like, djsjdkd i'm a jewish person who is invested in social justice and i literally had no clue about these rumors, you think billie, a 45 year old man who didn't know how to end his livestreams is googling "YFIP" before he hangs out or collabs with someone?

like as someone who has actually experienced antisemitism, and isn't being performative with my moral outrage, it isn't immidiately noticeable. like, you can be friends with someone for YEARS and then they'll throw in a jew joke that comes out of left field.

AGAIN. Kat lives in LA and runs a makeup empire and her own tattoo shop and we all know billie is off doing a million things, do y'all really think they're talking about anything slightly controversial? no, they're probably talking about music, sobriety, tattoos, etc, the 1-2 times they hang out, like

i'm not excusing her and i don't think that billie is perfect, but you guys are crazy if you think normal people google everyone they collaborate with to see if they're problematic djsjkdkdsk

even IF billie knew (which. lmao) she "claims" that she didn't actually send the picture that said "burn in hell jewbag" and that someone took one of her stock photos she gave out for autographs and made her look bad (i don't believe that, but there ya go. but also. why would they talk about something from 2008 that wasn't well publicized), the equating the slaughter of animals to the holocaust is fucked up, but AGAIN. it was 1 post that billie may or may not have seen and could be written off in his mind as her just being REALLY into animal rights. like, uh, the shoah is literally one of the worst things to happen in human history and i don't blame people for not being fully able to connect people making comparisons of it to people being antisemetic.

but ANYWAYS that's implying that billie was at any point fully invested in googling kat von d's history to make sure she's never said anything bad, which is a ridiculous expectation. she is not outwardly a nazi, at a surface glance she seems like a nice lady, and she definitely isn't spitting racist rhetoric every time she opens her mouth, so how would he POSSIBLY know??

and lmao guys he isn't perfect either, like i said. u think i believe the bs he says at concerts abt how we all love each other whether we're liberal or conservative? must be easy to say that when you live in the Most Liberal Part of california!!!! i don't like how he makes molestation jokes even though he probably thinks it's okay because he's always the butt of the jokes. i don't like how he used the n-word in a song, even though he was "quoting a racist".

your favs aren't morally pure, YOU guys aren't morally pure, you talk about not wanting to buy her product so you don't seem like you're supporting antisemitism when all your clothes are made from child laborers in sweatshops overseas. ever shop at urban outfitters/free people/anthropologie/zara? they're like. VERY antisemetic, and that even shows through in some of their products, unlike kat's line. ever eat/drink a nestle product? they give free samples of formula to women in africa so they stop making breast milk and are forced to buy their product, and then hike up the price. ever shop at walmart? they've been known to steal people's passports from a shrimp processing plant in thailand and force them to work to get them back which can literally be considered human trafficking. not to mention how they treat their workers in the USA or the immigrants they hire and force to work 7 days a week or else they'll deport them.

the world is fucked up!!!! if u are gonna be disappointed in anyone who even ASSOCIATES with someone or something that's problematic u ain't gonna have a fun time!! u can't put billie on a pedestal and expect him to never associate with anything harmful ever!!!

#feel free to rb

[briteboy]

(circumstantial name by @earnoodle)

IT’S FINALLY TIME FOR THE POST YOU’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR (or maybe just that one anon)

there’s a LOT in here, newer questions are generally first so if you asked something a while ago and you’re only interested in that, scroll towards the bottom. also doing wcifs separately (errr i’m gonna try my hardest to ok don’t crucify me)

this mass anons post includes topics ranging from Very Sweet Things Said To Me That I Don’t Deserve, nitpicking stranger things, crying over ramona, lou theories, Cillian Is A Fucking Creep theories (true), and completely unhelpful reshade advice

let’s f0cking do this

You're right, apart from carrying his stupid brain, Santi's head didn't do anything to any of us. I apologize for anon.

I'm pretty sure I said that already but I love Rooney and Santi's relationship so much I literally have no words for it

ME TOO LIKE IT’S JUST SO PURE TWO NOT-KIDS SCARED OF THE ADULT WORLD TRYING TO FIGURE THINGS OUT WITH THEIR WEIRD BRAINS TOGETHER ;__; i love them

YO i didnt know u were a demigirl!! im a demiboy nb Buddies

hell fuckin yeah dude!! we are starting a demi club

Ok but like I really want werewolves. Like I know it sounds stupid but we have vampire and while yes I love my bat babes, I want a giant pupper friend. I have story written out and plans for a cabin to build. Now I’m waiting for EA to give me my big hairy babes.

DUDE i want more supernatural stuff too, mostly witches like I NEED MY WITCHES AGAIN!!! ts3 witches were so good. i didn’t like ts3 werewolves much but i feel like they’d be super cool in ts4, knowing how the vampires came out. i NEED it

hihi! i've been very quietly (??) following your blog for some time now and i just fawn over your characters way too much ?? anywho, i've been wanting to start my own little simblr story but ,, i'm not entirely sure where to even start? i have so many stories that i'd love to get out there, and i have the means.. butt, how did you go about starting out?? so sorry this is so long but i look up to you a whole ton!!! ty ily! :-)

i’m the (??) lmao that’s me always but ahdhghdfkshg thank you so much!!!!! i’m so glad you love them, it means the world to me ;-; and listen, that was me, i had no idea how i was going to do it because i’d only seen ts3 stories up to that point and i thought there was like a set Way to tell stories but i had no idea what i was doing so i was like y’know what...i’m just gonna do it how i feel comfortable doing it and i’m gonna figure it out as i go along. so honestly try to roughly plan out what your stor(ies) will entail and if you get stuck on planning and can’t figure it out, just jump right into it, try to make a few scenes or get the ball rolling somehow, even if it’s just random posts (i mean that’s all my blog was until i decided to commit to santi’s story.) it’s always gonna feel weird and awkward at first, but you’ll get comfortable the more you do it and it’ll figure itself out, trust me!

I read through most of your story posts the other day and now I’m rereading it again just to torture myself some more (and maybe catch up on some posts I may have missed). I honestly don’t think I’ve come across a sims story that’s so beautifully written & includes such evocative pictures as yours. I’m really at a loss for words, it’s all so stunning. & after a nearly two-month long creative block, it’s planted the smallest seed of inspiration in the back of my mind, so thank you for your art.

AHHHH AHSDHKGKDSJG WHAT!!!!! it’s always crazy hearing that 1) people actually care about my stuff, and 2) that it inspires them. like i really cannot believe that, stilL!! thank you so so much, i’m so happy you enjoyed it (as torturous as it was, lmao) it seriously warms my heart that you’re getting your groove back in the creative world, that means more to me than ANYTHING!! good luck with your art or whatever you decide to do with that inspiration!

 can i pls have your editing skill please and thank you

i owe most my editing at this point to reshade so honestly get reshade and u will probably become better than me

o added u on animal crossing and when you added me back i was so happy,, your little person is sooo adorable ((:

OMG!! thank you!! everyone’s person on there is adorable i cry i love them all so much i’m so mad tho it won’t let me add any more friends!!! it probably cuts off at like 100 friends or something STUPID

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love your photos so much. I'm legit about to just ditch sims 3 for 4 now because of your amazing posts. 😖

LMFAO no but really THANK YOU I LOVE YOU!!! if you can manage playing both i admire u, i’ve invested too much time and effort into ts4 to ever fully go back to any other sims games tbh

The new patch made my game unplayable! I'm crying, I miss my doggos...

NOOOOO!!! hopefully by now you’ve found a fix, i’m prayin for u

long time listener, first time caller yoooo. i like everyone love your stories and your sim aesthetic so so so much and just tbh i was offended on your behalf about that ask from that person wanting to novelize your stories. like you were way too nice. this is your intellectual property and it's fucked up that someone would think it'd be okay to duplicate it as long as they used a different medium. this is prob a bad one to repost just wanted to you to know you're an awesome, singular voice

omfg lmao this is a radio show now *z100 voice* tellem why ya mad euhhh first of all i can’t believe someone even ASKED that, i’m in shock because like what this is so foreign to me. people want to write about MY characters WHAT! like that alone...takes a long time to process. and like i know i should say no but then i feel mean but they’re also my creations so like idk. it warms my heart that you feel so strongly and would stand up for me like that i’m cryin thank u for calling in i love u

I JUST FINISHED YOUR ENTIRE STORY AND I'M NOT OK WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PUTTING ME THROUGH THAT SHIT IT'S AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER AND I FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE ABUSED MY (NON EXISTENT) INNOCENCE WOW

I’M SO SORRY U HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR STEALING YOUR INNOCENCE I NEVER MEANT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN OSDAFKJDSK BUT THANK YOU FOR READING I’M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT EVEN IF IT HURT YOU!!!

I've been up all night and it's now 11am. I'm completely binging on your stories bc I am in LOVE and need a Molly in my game asap. Do you think you'll ever upload her?

omG my freaking story inciting insomnia i’m so sorry for ur sleep schedule first of all, but at least that makes you identify with santi even more omg tho ;___; (how many times will i say ‘omg’ i wonder) i don’t think so because she is so dear to me and makes my heart ache, she is just so special, i dunno if i could ever release her into the wild like that lmao. i haven’t even shared her with my friends (not that i really ever had a reason to) but like yeah. maybe in the future that’ll change but right now, no, i’m sorry <3

To change the topic: Idk if you watch stranger things but I only managed to get to episode 3 of season 2 before I stopped watching lmao it was so bad and Billy (a certified Cunt) ruined the whole show for me

YEAH I DID! omg. i have a LOT of issues with this season (mostly in how badly they tried to retcon nancy and everyone else not caring about barb’s death, how bad the writing was in the realm of nancy and steve breaking up and then her and jonathan getting together...holy fuck it was so uncomfortable with that 40 yr old conspiracy theorist guy i couldn’t even enjoy my ship getting together lmao) also ur right, max and billy honestly did not offer anything to the story...like i loved max too but what was the point...billy acted like their presence and the reason they had to move was so dramatic when it was really nothing...unless they’re saving that for season 3 but like. the whole situation with billy was so anticlimactic. he was like a walmart version of henry from IT. like boohoo ur dad’s an asshole and then he beat up steve. good character arc. i liked max standing up for herself but really...that whole thing was so lackluster, i didn’t care about it at all. ALSO I HATED THAT THEY DIDN’T LET MAX AND ELEVEN BE FRIENDS!! i’m sure it’ll happen in season 3 but like c’mon...that would’ve made the max character feel a little more important to the story. anyway yeah fuck billy and i don’t get why everyone is lusting after him or his actor they’re both ugly! thanks for listening

I just got the sims 4 + city living and I’m so excited! I was really inspired by your stories and style in general... I was wondering what packs do you have and also what are your favourite sims 4 hairs? I’m having trouble finding ones and I love your style!

YAY I’M EXCITED FOR YOU!!! omg aww it warms my heart so much when people say i inspire them because i never anticipated that kind of response, thank you so much <3 hmmm i think i have all of them except glamour stuff and fitness stuff. and pretty much all the hairs i download are here or here. (or the subsequent ‘tf’, ‘cf’, ‘tm’ and ‘cm’ tags as well, according to age)

UHM a 19 year old and a 13 year old? Poor baby Lou... Also youre a brilliant writer i cant

😬😬😬  stay tuned ajasdhjhjsahd thank you so much!!!

My stan levels for you have increased so much? like thanks for being a good ally, clAps for femmesim!

lmao thank you, i don’t really deserve praise tho i’m just passing on the knowledge of those patient enough to teach me. just trying to do what i can with my privilege u know. ily

How do you have teeth showing in so many of your pictures of Lou and Molly, do you PS them in?

i’ve gotten this question before and it’s usually just the poses used! i do have some lipsticks that have teeth on them but i mostly use them for just rooney.

Honestly, a fight between Santi and that new guy (srry, forgot his name while typing this) would be so hot. Like, I hope Santi would win but like just watching Santi fight him for Lou would make me happy!! Also, I live for your stories💞

omG i’m about to call up vince mcmahon they both need to fight on smackdown it’s gonna happen. they’ll both be shirtless too ok and THANK YOU ILY

boi poc can be PREJUDICED against white people but there is no such thing as reverse racIIIIIIiiiiIIIIIiiiIIIIsm

Lemme just say that you must be feeling so stressed rn. I love you and your simblr!!! Your posts light up my day!! <3333

OMg kind of. this week has taken A Lot out of me and i really just want to chill at home and play my freaking GAME but obligations. u know. here’s hoping i get a day off this week. i’m mad i’m probably gonna miss gianni’s birthday too (it’s on tuesday) and i wanted to do something for it!! i’ll probably do it late like i did last year too lmao i’m so sorry baby g ANYWAY u didn’t ask to hear about any of this...thank you for this sweet message i love you <3

why,,,, are people... coming to your blog to discuss race you are a fucking simblr WHAT

the real question is why do people go to you like its your job to educate them lmao like theres so many resources out there

SHAWDY u aint wrong reverse racism is literally a joke i am so sorry you have to go through all of this keep stepping on white feelings we deserve it

I was wondering would u consider Asians to be POC?

yes

I just finished Strange the Dreamer and it was fucking amazing. I cried so much and I laughed and I sat in absolute amazement at the world Laini Taylor has created. 100/10 would recommend

ahhhh i really need to read it apparently!! i’m like 10% away from being done with a dance with dragons (and then i have to wait for the next book like a peasant HURRY UP KING GEORGE) anyway this one is definitely on my list!

omgomg!! I just met this girl in my class who has eyes just like ramona's!!! But like instead of being brown w/ a little bit of blue, they were blue w/ a little bit of brown!!! Dude I was so shook I rlly didn't think ppl had eyes like that!

OMG!!!! that’s amazing! and yes heterochromia is a real thing haha. i’ve only met one person with it and he had the same color combo as ramona too, only his was full heterochromia, not sectoral.

*me in the background screaming* nO yOU LEAVE HER ALoNE baD-DAD-MaN!

ME TF TOO

every time i read some of your stories i get an ache in my heart that doesn't go away until i either cry or sleep so interpret that as you like

OMG ;_____; ok me too tho my heart literally hurts thinking about my characters sometimes...mostly santi...i hate him (no i don’t :{ )

hey uhh idk if you've answered something like this before but do you have a spotify or something bc your music taste is GOLD

THANK YOU!! you were the first person to ask about this haha and hopefully you saw my answer to the other question about it! i just made one and it’s here!

hi hi ! i’m seeing all the drama on da blog and i really want to read the whole story but i can’t get to it on mobile so i was wondering if you could link the beginning and tell me what the best order to read it in is ( i’m so confused because i’ve seen sm people y’all about a parallel story so idk if i’m being dumb !! ) i hope this isn’t any inconvenience also your sims are so beautiful sjajsjajs

hey on mobile the link is just: http://femmesim.tumblr.com/tagged/story/chrono i would honestly just recommend that order haha, it makes things simpler and it encompasses ALL story posts, or posts that give context. there are parallels in my story, lou’s is kind of a parallel of santi’s, only different...well...you’ll see. but yeah sorry this is so late! and thank you!!!

TU HISTORIA ES TAAAAAN BUENA POR DIOOOOS (YOURE STORY IS SOOOOO GOOD OMG) <3 <3 *OO* *cries in spanish*

MUCHAS GRACIAS ENCANTADORA PERSONAAAA <333

lou is wendy right? i mean, a wendy complex is someone who is overly mothering to partners, and lou is already a mother and ik that doesn't really count as foreshadowing but it seems like it could be a link to me. it'd make sense too, considering guys that go after younger girls (ew) are usually immature ie peter pan complex. it'd make the most sense that those two go together then.

heheheheh that is a VERY good observation...that’s all i’m gonna say!!

This has nothing to do with what's happening in the story rn, but whatever. I was wondering if you were going to mention lou's struggles with being a single mom and the stigma surrounding single motherhood? As a single mother myself I'd really enjoy seeing you take on the issue. Personally, my biggest problem was overcoming the generalizations people put on you when you're a single mom. People always assumed that I that I was stupid and uneducated because I had my son when I was 17.

yes! that will definitely come up. i will focus a lot on her struggles as a single mom. so far i’ve mostly just peppered in some stuff about money troubles, and that will come up again, and the issues you mention will be pretty central to her character as well. i’m sorry you have to endure that, it’s not fair. people don’t even realize how strong and dedicated single mothers are.

when you say Peter Pan, do you mean the Disney stuff or the og creepy stuff?

i mean the general themes of the story and how that translates into a peter pan complex: boy who never grows up, feels like he fits in more with younger people (haha...yikes), read the message above because that anon described the other half of the equation better than i could

Wait, hold up. That dude is cute but I feel like he’s coming onto Lou way too strong. I have a bad feeling.. Lou is like 13 there and he is 19 I mean I’ve seen bigger gaps between people, but she is not legal yet.. Where are you going with this? 🤨😅

yyyyyyep that feeling is warranted! i am going a way i don’t think you guys expect me to go...i think you’ll be very confused at the end of this part lmao. that being said, i’m not putting any of this in for shock value or to romanticize inappropriate relationships like this. (i’m probably going to be repeating that a LOT for this story but please just keep that in mind)

Hey mom wanna hear a fun as hell story? I just got back from the ER bc I fell on my razor after showering, and practically cut my nipple in half. (I am in so much pain hELP)

OMFG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR POOR NIPPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M SO SORRY I HOPE IT FEELS BETTER PLEASE UPDATE ME ON THE NIPPLE STATUS

U gotta watch sense8!!! Apart from the v awkward sex scenes it's v good, has a lot of representation and shit Just watch that shit show, u won't regret it (And if you do I cut your throat oops)

i’ve heard it’s good! i remember when it first came out and everyone was like Wow The Representation so honestly anything with diversity has already got me hooked pls don’t murder me.

I'm calling it now. He's Fi's dad. and he's a FUCKING CREEP!! Bitch you are 19!! LOU IS 13!! BACK THE FUCK OFF YOU PERV!!

no spoilers or anything but honestly i’m with you @ cillian die

Are they gonna fucc, o no

right now? no. that would be Very Bad

bABY ITS COLD OUTSIDE

oh same

Hi ! Your lastest edit (graveyard girl) is truly amazing, how did you make that bokeh behind her ? 😱😍

thank you so much!!! it’s reshade (with matso DOF)!

You've probably got this question a lot of times but i can't find the answer for it. What reshade do you use?

i gotta add this to my faq, it’s one i created myself but i started out with this one (it totally doesn’t resemble that one anymore but i think it’s a good starting point)

how do you make good looking male sims? mine always look the same and kinda girly..

hmmm longer faces, prominent chins and jaws, smaller eyes, bigger noses...generally yeah

What do you mean 9 + alt?

you gotta turn bb.moveobjects on and then press alt + 9 when an object is selected to move it upward. so what i did with those poses i made was, i selected a teleporter and pressed alt + 9 until it was at a spot i liked on the roof. that’s why releasing those poses would be tricky, ‘cause every build is different so there’s no set way to place them, you just kinda have to play around with them

You mentioned GoT so naturally, I have to chime in and express my love for Jon. Honestly, he won me over ever since the first season? I'm at season 5 now and people have already warned me so now i'm silently weeping, waiting for something to happen to my precious bby help

JONNY BOY!!!!!!!!!!! i loved his emo ass since the beginning but his arc with qorin halfhand (was he in the show??) was probably the best arc in book 2 and then his book 3 arc was just...SO GOOD, SO MUCH happens to him and i just felt like i was watching my son go through it all...i love that boy so much ;-; i’m almost at the end of the last book and i’m scared for him because of the one spoiler i know lmao and you’re at that point too so GET READY we’ll go through it together ok

So there's this game I'm playing where someone talking about another character says 'maybe you can break him from his ouroboros of self-fladulation' (I know I probably butchered those spellings but I'm not a bright egg and autocorrect isn't helping rip) and tbh it made me think of Santi. (Also I'mma scream of you get this reference jsyk)

OMG THE FACT THAT YOU THOUGHT OF HIM ;-; and it’s okay u are the brightest egg in the bunch to me. I’M SORRY I DON’T GET THIS REFERENCE BECAUSE I’M NOT A VIDEO GAME PERSON BUT I’LL PRETEND I DO KNOW WHAT UR TALKING ABOUT anyway yes santi is currently in the process of breaking his self-flagellation and embracing the oneness of the ouroboros (as opposed to letting the cycle repeat itself until he’s worn down to nothing)

do you have any favorite pose creators?

answered

do you have any tips for taking good screenshots in game? like how to get the good angles and good quality? i play on ultra but i think when i zoom in and then use the arrows on my keyboard to move around, the pictures gets less clear and looks kinda blurry. how should i do this?

well if you’re already using ultra, there’s not much you can do lmao. sims 4 is just bad with textures in general. it also depends on the objects as well, some are better quality than others. if i zoom in far on a sim’s face, i generally know there will be some pixelation and i can clean that up in photoshop with topaz clean and the smudge tool. i am very reliant on photoshop sometimes lmao. it sounds like you already have the basics of taking good screenshots, it’s just sometimes you have to fight and work with sims 4′s less-than-hd quality.

burn it down by daughter reminds me of santi & i'm in pain

ouroboros!!! death! birth! death again! birth again rinse repeat! also santi breaking the cycle because third time's the charm

The tattoo is an Ouroboros. It originated in Egyptian iconography, and it symbolizes recreation. My boy's recreating himself, I'm so proud.

ouroboros, the dragon eating its own tail. it's a sign of eternal renewal

i saw the post of child molly and just started BAWLING i miss her what the fuck she's my fave character i'M CRYING

ME TOO BICH!! ME FUCKIN TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just read all of A Serious Case Of The Novembers so far and theres still tears on my face. some of the best stuff ive read in a while, great job on everything

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! ALSO I’M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU CRY

every time you write about molly and her in heaven it makes my heart swell, like the characters were answering asks and someone asked her what heaven was like and even though it was so small short lil answer it still pulls at the heart strings, basically what im trying to say is that your writing is so good! <3

omg ;_______; me too, i feel like she has such a simple way with words and although her descriptions of heaven are brief, they are also complex and beautiful, and even just writing it chokes me up ;-; thank you so much tho i’m so glad you like it!!

Molly: out Molly tatto: also out

why did this remind me of this post:

How did you edit in the fire in the last post? Looks cool

i searched things like “bonfire” and pasted parts of it that i wanted on the pic to make it look more realistic, then put a layer mask on the pasted pic and erased the edges and stuff to make it blend in better. the sparks and stuff i added by pasting it onto a new layer and changing the blending mode to screen! 

idk if you have every watched grey anatomy but Lou's backstory is starting to remind me of Jo (Jo is a character from the show) like Jo was in a abusive relationship and she is married to the guy but she cant get divorced or he will come and find her. So like if Lou didn't tell Fiona's dad he was a dad and Lou was married to him and cant escape the marriage (cause abuse), plus it would explain Lou's kink with being choked ;) full circle *god-like heaven music with tiniest violin is playing now*

ooh no i don’t but that’s interesting and i’m excited you even made a connection like that! i will say that it’s not lou who likes to be choked (the very opposite actually lmao) but otherwise the situation does kinda fit. i’m the violin

I have a freakin bio pre ap test tomorrow on photosynthesis and i have no idea what it is im going to fail save me

I’M ANSWERING THIS VERY LATE BUT I HOPE YOUR TEST WENT WELL!!!!!! *spongebob voice* photosynthesis

last time I installed reshade I couldn't get it to open the controls or shaders or anything in game :///// any tips?? I love they way reshade looks too!!

hmmmmm well i know the control panel opens when you press shift + f2, and then you check the boxes of the effects you want on them. i haven’t heard of this problem so i dunno what other advice to give i’m sorry :{ if it’s your first time installing it, you might have to wait a little to get it to load up.

Da puppy is so cute!!!

That dog and Romona are so adorable, I might cry

Ramona's cheeks are so big im in love

NAJKSDJGKJSD THANK YOU i love her and her chubby cheeks ;-;

OMG TOTORO IS SO BEAUTIFUL I LOVE GHIBLI UGH FKSJFJANFB

SAME!!!!!!! if i could only watch ghibli movies for the rest of my life i’d be totally fine with that

THE DOGGIE HAS EYES JUST LIKE RAMONAS IM GONNA FUCKIGN CRY

ME FUCKGN TOO!!!!!!!!!! it was fate (aka me creating the wolf pup to look just like her shh i am fate)

Hope I'm not bothering you but i wondered if you knew how to make Tamo sims eyebags work on a toddler? Do I just click in s4s to work for toddler on the "age and gender flags" when looking in My CC or do I have to do something a little more than that please? Thank you.

for any skin detail or makeup, you have to go into s4s and open the package up, go to one of the tabs (honestly i don’t remember which one because i don’t have it open rn lmao) and you’ll see the different age groups and you check the box for toddler. and then save it of course. (there’s probably a better guide on how to do this somewhere lmao)

Hey :) Sorry to take up your time, I was wondering if you use win7, win8 or win10? I'm trying to decide on one and people seem to have very strong feelings about it. Also what web browser do you use? I've used Firefox, but I had some problems on CC websites. Thanks<3

i use windows 10 because it came with my laptop lmao i honestly don’t know much about windows systems at all!! and i use google chrome because it’s never failed me (even though windows keeps pressuring me to use the new internet explorer called “edge”)

i just finished all of novembers in a sitting and 1. i'm Sobbing, 2. your music taste is bomb

THANK YOU!!! my music taste is like one part indie shit, one part rap and hip-hop, twelve parts emo middle school bands

what is the size of the original unedited screenshot?

1920x1080

For reshade when your first install and select the reshade you want to use do you have to edit the settings? Cause last time I tried to (I didn’t know what most of the things meant lmao) but it kept saying error or something so I couldn’t play the game so I ended up taking out reshade

do you mean the preset you want to use? i mean no you can just play with that preset, you don’t have to change anything about it. i’m not sure what you mean but i followed this guide for setting it up

Will you ever share your preset?? Or maybe a preset made be you??

i’ve answered this before but the answer is Maybe

Hi!!!! How do you make the rays of light you have in your photos?? THANK U BBY <3333

that’s actually in my editing tutorial but here you go <3

is reshade only available on windows + do we need to pay for it

yes and no

Hello love! I was wondering (and maybe it's a dumb question, idk) but what life span setting do you use? I would assume you turned off aging for your story but maybe I'm wrong ;w; Thank you!!

i do actually have aging off ‘cause i’m a coward lmao even in the ts3 days when i wasn’t doing story stuff and literally just playing i had it off for the most part and just aged sims up when i wanted because i like to be in control of Everything (aries)

I really just wanted to say that I’m new I your tumblr but your stories are amazing and I love them so much!!! Keep doing what you’re doing💞👏🏼

hey thank you!!! you are so kind and i’m glad you’re enjoying everything!!

In your reshade settings where have you set it to save your SS's to and which key please? I can't find mine after setting it to desktop/screenshots :(

i just set mine to ts4′s screenshots folder because it’s what i was used to and it works for me haha. hmmmmmm did you copy the exact address or whatever it’s called of your folder’s location and then paste it into the reshade box? try doing that with another location and see if it works. if anything you can do what i did ‘cause it worked for me 

ok SO i came across this music video for this like spanish/english speaking indie band called The Marías and the song was déjate llevar and literally everything about the music video reminded me of rooney and gianni

OMMMGGG i love this so much, i cry @ music suggestions and this is so them ;-; i think i’ve heard of this band before actually!!

a little life is going to fucking ruin you,,, just a warning

great! i look forward to it

can a steal ur talent

have it i don’t need it

What app are you using to make them cool edit things??

i tagged it but it was doodle face

omg Strange the Dreamer is so freaking amazing! It’s literally one of my favorite books of all time; You’ll love it. The writing is absolutely delightful

you guys are really singin the praises for this book!! i have so many dang books to read i swear

#nonsims #saviorhide #anonymous #sunny answers #it is done and i never want to see another anon message again #i retire

[paradox-oflife]

massive q and a post part 3 ignore this pls

1. If you could learn any language fluently what would it be? Um maybe latin because it sounds cool but for practical purposes probably spanish lol

2. What historical Figure would you love to see in 21st centuary life? Jesus, not because I’m Christian but I’m curious to see what he would say

3. As a kid were you ever frighted of a monster under the bed or in the cupboard? No because my bed didn’t have space underneath 

4. Do you like clowns? nope

5. Do you prefer BBC or ITV? Okay, this is clearly British but I’d go with BBC

6. Have you ever been surfing? Once. It didn’t go that well lol

7. Have you ever been snowboarding? Yeah, it’s pretty fun actually!

8. Who was better, the Beatles or Elvis Presley? uuuh the Beatles

9. Whats your favourite type of foreign food? By foreign I’m assuming non-American/British. But anything from Taiwan (except for pig’s blood ew) is soul food for me :)

10. Which Foreign country do you dislike the most? I... don’t know. North Korea I guess? But when it comes to most countries, it’s the government that makes it bad.

11. Do you like your music loud or easy listening? (What does this mean??) Depends on the mood

12. Whats your favourite animated or cartoon program? Adventure time :D

13. Do you sing in the shower? Errr, no.

14. Are you a clean or messy person? I try my best to be clean but it always ends up messy.

15. Whats your prefered playing piece in monopoly? I usually go with the cat :3

16. Can or Do you still play twister? God I haven’t played since 5th grade.

17. Can you play chess? Yeah, not really good at it though.

18. Do you know the dance steps to an annoying cheesey pop song? Haha no because I suck at dancing

19. Do you prefer straight or bendy straws? Bendy

20. Have you ever entered a talent contest? And did you win? No .-. I’m not the type to do that lol

21. Do you like poetry? Yeah. I’d say so.

22. Are you a sore loser? Nah, I’m pretty chill when it comes to that type of thing

23. Which would you choose? Jelly or Ice Cream? Ice Cream > Jelly

24. Whats your favourite type of Pie? New Zealand’s steak and cheese

25. Whats your most used phrase? Hm. Maybe “yeah nah”

26. Whats your most used word? Not sure. I talk a lot.

27. Who would you want to play you in a movie of your life? Someone Asian of course, someone who has studied me well enough and understands me

28. What would your dream job be? Okay, I’m gonna be real. I wanted to be a vet but lowkey I’m too colorblind for it lol. I’m planning to study in Physical Therapy

29. Which song do you hate the most? I mainly just listen to the same albums nowadays but I guess i don’t really vibe with a lot of pop songs.

30. How long does it take you to get ready? Depends how tired I am. If I get pretty good sleep it takes maybe 10 minutes at most. 

31. What do you think the greatest invention has been? The printing press.

32. Whats your favourite feature on the opposite sex? Uuuh i dont really know. Forearms are nice i guess

33. Whats your least favourite feature on the opposite sex? Sometimes they’re just really oblivious to really obvious things

34. Who's your favourite Comedian? I don’t even listen to comedians really but Chelsea Peretti is pretty funny.

35. What's your favourite board game? Probably Monopoly. There’s no greater feeling than seeing the life drain from your friends’ eyes as you collect $5000 from them

36. Do you have any lucky items, objects or traditions? When I’m having a bad day I like to just read through my yearbooks and look at all the compliments people wrote. 

37. Do you have any superstitions? Not really.

38. Whats your favourite Movie quote? I have a lot. But maybe Manners Maketh Man.

39. Who would win in a fight? Chuck Norris or Jack Bauer? Chuck Norris.

40. Do you have much of an ego? I wish. I want to be more confident

41. Do you wear sunglasses indoors to look cool or stylish? No. Nothing against it though.

42. Are you a hat person? Nah

43. Whats your favourite supermarket chain? Costco

44. Whats your favourite fastfood chain? Smashburger or Inn n Out

45. Whats your first thought upon waking up? “Lord help me.”

46. What animal would you most like to have as a pet? I love dogs. And cats. 

47. Whats your favourite type of tree? Pine trees always remind me of home.

48. If you could bankrupt one person or company who would it be? Uuuh as much as I want to bankrupt someone like Jeff Bezos that’d be bad because a lot of people rely on Amazon

49. If you could steal one thing without consequence what would it be? I honestly don’t know. 

50. Who's your favourite celeb with the same first name or surname as you? I don’t know much celebrities with the same name as me.

51. If evil-doers invaded your country would you rush to the battlelines to defend the motherland or hide in a box? Um hide in a box I’m so tiny. Like I know a bit of martial arts but like??? I’m literally 5′1″ and i’m only 115 pounds. Someone could bench me easily.

52. Whats your favourite flower? I like lillies 

53. Do you believe in ghosts? Im really mixed about it. I believe demons exist though

54. Do you believe in the loch ness monster? Nay

55. Do you believe in Aliens? Eeeeh kind of but when i think about aliens i think about microorganisms. 

56. Do you believe the Governments hide technology and information from the public? Yes 100%

56. Which is your favourite pokemon? Growlithe uwu

57. What horror fiction character scares you the most?  Pennywise. No thanks.

58. Can you do 10 revolutions of a hula hoop? Yeah

59. Do you think Great Britain should have a National Day? n/a 60.Do you think Great Britain should be part of a United Europe?n/a 61. Would you want the Euro or keep the British Pound?n/a

62. Were you part of the Brownies/Cubs/Scouts/Guides etc? Nah

63. Have you ever invented a fairly unique meal or drink? No I’m not that good at cooking lol

64. Do you have any secret family recipes? My family only knows how to cook asian food and well, asian food is very freestyle

65. Do you have any family secrets? :o     uuuuuh well, it wouldn’t be a secret if I said it right?

66. Are you good at keeping secrets? Yeah! You can count on me.

67. Have you ever been up in a hot air balloon? Nopenopenopenope

68. Whats your favourite Sci-fi film/program etc? ugghhhh i have so much. I like the Martian tho?

69. When playing checkers or chess do you prefer to be black or white? Black

70. Which is better, a Pastie or Sausage Roll? Sausage roll

71. Do you prefer shopping on the high street or online? Irl, I’m pretty impatient man

72. Would you ever want to learn to fly? Like, fly an airplane? Or fly as in levitate. Cause if levitate, then YES

73. Do you often read your horoscope? Nah, as accurate as they can be sometimes, I don’t really believe in astrology 

74. Have you ever had a proper Tarot reading? Eeeee no. Personal opinion, tarot cards are hella sketchy. I don’t mess with that stuff.

75. Whats your favourite brand of newspaper? Honestly at this point I’ve given up on the news. I just read stuff off of reddit sometimes.

76. Have you ever milked a cow? No

77. Have you ever used the phrase "back in my time" to someone younger than you? HAHAH one time. I realized my friend’s younger brother had never seen an iPod before and I was so baffled he didn’t even know what it was.

78. Do you love or hate rollercoasters? Love them

79. Which was the greatest Empire? Maybe Macedonian. I want to say the Romans, but god, they had a lot of problems.

80. Whats your favorite word? Catharsis.  

81. Whats your favourite sportsware brand? Adidas or Nike I guess

82. Do you buy any weekly/monthly magazines? Nah

83. Who's your favourite Superhero? uuuuh Thor 

84. Who's your favourite Villain/Baddie? Doofensmirtz. He wasn’t even bad lmao. He thinks he’s a Chaotic Evil when in reality he’s a Chaotic Good.

85. What was the last Album you purchased? I don’t purchase a lot of music tbh bc I broke, but the last album I listened to was Hot Fuss.

86. What was the last DVD you purchased? A Daria DVD I found at Walmart for five dollars.

87. What was the last piece of clothing you purchased? Some jeans.

88. When pulling crackers does everyone get one each regardless or whoever gets the big ends keeps all the prizes? I’m assuming this is some British tradition so idk

89. Do you ever make your own greetings cards? Not really.

90. Do you have a swiss army knife? I used to then I lost it.

91.At what age did you twig onto the fact Santa wasnt real? My parents never did the whole Santa thing so I always knew it was false

92. Whats your favourite fruit? Watermelon

93. Have you ever done something really unbelivable, only to have no one around to see it? Um YEAH. I was 10th grade and I was in the Martial Arts club, which was a version of Aikido. I tripped on these stairs one time going down, then I did this glorious shoulder roll and got right up. No one saw but I was so proud of myself.

94. Do you buy from charity shops? Occasionally, if I can find some. 

95. Have you ever sold your services? No

96. Have you ever raised money for charity? Yeah, it was for a school club tho

97. Have you ever won a giant sized cuddly toy from a fair? Yes uwu

98. Is the glass half full or half empty? It’s half full

[news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog]

The best memes of 2018 so far

If you feel like you see bad news every time you log onto social media, you're not alone. Going on Twitter can be an overwhelming experience, with constant arguments, drama, and snitch tagging.

Memes are the only thing holding the internet together at this point. 

It's been a stressful year so far, but at least we have these memes! Let's take a walk down memory lane — meme-ory lane, if you will.

1. Eating Tide Pods

Vincent van Gogh used to eat Tide pods because he wanted happiness inside him

— lusty goth (@elkalumpy) December 27, 2017

The Tide Pod eating craze technically started in December 2017, but its effects lasted well into the new year, concerning parents nationwide. The forbidden snacks will always have a place in our hearts for the countless memes and cursed foods it inspired. 

2. What your child is really texting about

Is your child texting about @olivegarden? Here’s a quick guide to find out: OG: Olive Garden LMAO: love me an olive LOL: lots of lasagna ROFL: ravioli or flavorful linguine BRB: breadsticks rock, bro WTF: where’s the fettuccine STFU: some tiramisu for us

— jillian dradzynski (@jillianallyce) January 22, 2018

Concerned parents could breathe a sigh of relief as Tide Pod obsessions died down, but it seems like texting lingo will always be a mystery to the Olds. Luckily, a handy guide to common acronyms became a meme. What are your kids texting about? Probably Olive Garden.

3. Change my mind

pic.twitter.com/GgrxCUolVt

— Prodigy (@CSN_Prodigy) February 21, 2018

Sometimes you look at a meme and realize there really is hope for humanity. When a conservative podcaster/professional troll set up a table encouraging people to change his mind about "male privilege," the internet got to work and turned him into a meme. It became a platform to share your diciest opinions, from pineapple on pizza to the plot of Bee Movie.

4. Wholesome memes 

People have a knack for finding the good in anything, and as dark as 2018 seemed, the flood of wholesome memes gave us hope. While wholesome memes have been around for a bit, 2018 is their year to shine.

5. Gru's plan

If you have a brilliant, well-thought-out plan that ended up going wrong, Gru's plan is the meme for you. The four panel image conveys so much optimism and disappointment in one revelation, perfectly capturing what it feels like when stealing the moon doesn't go your way.

6. American Chopper hot takes

pic.twitter.com/4mb1m3lOHI

— Garf Gab (@GarfieldFanArt) March 22, 2018

American Chopper came back for a revival this year, prompting the internet to bring back an iconic scene from the original show. The destructive father-son duo became a meme for the hottest, spiciest takes. 

7. Build your perfect man

ladies you have $5 to build the perfect man $300 - tall $200 - smart $400 - rich $150- famous $2 - name is Paul $3 -is a mall cop $500 - attractive

— Lazy dog (@LaziestCanine) April 25, 2018

Does the perfect man exist? This meme encourages people to build their ideal partner. There's just one catch — you have limited funds and the characteristics you can afford are pricey. Guess you'll just have to settle for Paul Blart, mall cop. 

8. Who killed Hannibal?

This is a damn good contender for best meme of the year - all of the variations are good...but this one is the best pic.twitter.com/SwpOUAuRjk

— RickyFTW (@rickyftw) April 18, 2018

The "Who killed Hannibal?" meme is great for situations when you've done something shitty and need to shift the blame to someone else. Like Eric Andre in The Eric Andre Show, some people just refuse to take accountability.

9. Walmart yodel boy 

11-year-old Mason Ramsey went viral for yodeling in Walmart, and instantly stole America's heart. He performed at Coachella, landed a record deal, and released a single about being in adorable tween love. Walmart yodel boy slaps. 

10. Is this a pigeon?

pic.twitter.com/k90ssimgos

— Cat Graffam (@catgraffam) May 4, 2018

Although this image has been around since 2011, the meme blew up this year to convey absolute confusion. The meme originated from an anime, where a character points to a butterfly and asks, "Is this a pigeon?"

11. Ladies, imagine your best life

Ladies, imagine this. It’s 15 years from now, and you have no kids. You’re the cool wine aunt that occasionally comes back to the country for a brief visit before leaving for another long, exotic vacation. You have no commitments, and a suspicious amount of money.

— Em Treasure (@emtreas) May 22, 2018

A viral Twitter movement subverted a romanticized version of suburban life by asking ladies about their most ideal, most bizarre life. The meme covers it all, from (again) the plot of Bee Movie to imagining marriage with Stuart Little. 

12. Yanny or Laurel?

It's The Dress of 2018. The audio illusion tore apart the internet, with friends and neighbors turning against each other over whether a recording said "Yanny" or "Laurel." It was fun until the Trump administration hopped on and killed the meme forever. RIP.

13. Sad cowboy

they always say yeehaw but never ask haw yee pic.twitter.com/Zcqy3y1sbc

— fahad 🤠 (@ShlongUziVert_) March 25, 2018

Who hurt this sweet country boy? We just want to know. The sad cowboy meme (alternatively, and more accurately called "sad howdy boy") has been around since 2017, but popped up again this year. Someone needs to reach out to him and let him know that everything's going to be OK.

14. By the age of 35 

By age 35 you should have lost at least twice your most valuable information for lack of backups.

— Miguel de Icaza (@migueldeicaza) May 20, 2018

By the age of 35, there's really no need to have your life figured out. The meme plays off a report by Marketwatch telling people that by the age of 35, they should have twice their salary saved. Twice. Who even has time for that?? 

15. I am: gay/straight/bi

i’m: ⚪️ gay ⚪️ straight ⚪️ bisexual 🔘never gonna give you up pic.twitter.com/6lsdZkN4g0

— hanz💨 (@hasharakl) May 23, 2018

Broke: labels. Woke: RickRolling. The gay/straight/bi meme has it all: pop punk lyrics, nods to classic Vines, and poking fun at tired gender binaries and sexuality labels.

16. Distressed LeBron

When you leave all the doors open but your dog poops in the house anyway pic.twitter.com/LY8u7CqQzJ

— Harrison Faigen (@hmfaigen) June 1, 2018

Poor LeBron. His reaction after the Cavaliers lost to the Golden State Warriors became an iconic meme for, well, when you're too stressed for words. 

17. IHOb

IHOP is changing its name to IHOB and while people think it stands for “breakfast” I’m putting my money on BETRAYAL

— bea (@bayahhh) June 6, 2018

IHOP changing its name to IHOb for burgers was probably the most overhyped marketing ploy in history. The name change was thoroughly underwhelming, but sparked a hilarious Twitter feud between rivaling fast food brands. 

18. Melania's awful jacket

ok i am into this jacket pic.twitter.com/ZJdx4hwIsG

— sara yasin 😐 (@sarayasin) June 21, 2018

Melania, girl, what are you doing? The First Lady wore the worst possible jacket for a visit to meet detained immigrant children at the border. Was she trolling her husband? Was she messing with the mainstream media? Is she really that clueless? Either way, the $39 Zara jacket will probably be remembered as one of the memes defining this hell presidency. 

19. Alexa, play Despacito

nakia: t'challa was murdered in a ritual combat m'baku: this is so sad alexa play despacito

— beth (@sam_bucky) June 27, 2018

This is a beautiful shitpost. Reminiscent of the world's smallest violin meme, "Alexa, play Despacito" is the perfect reaction for overdramatic, not very sad news. Why is this meme so funny? It's not just not caring about the situation, but telling Alexa to play Despacito conveys absolute detachment from feeling anything. It's art. 

WATCH: IHOP tries to advertise its burgers and gets flamed

#_uuid:25b2624a-2ef3-3820-aaa3-b2026efbaa3b #_author:Morgan Sung #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_revsp:news.mashable