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getallemeralds · 4 years

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explorers of arvus: the day without dawn / 7.23.19

last time on d&d, we escaped the castle in the dead grove

this time on d&d, we're going back, because WE FUCKED UP

[everyone rolls arcana]

DM: [scary] There is nothing in [this book] about this. charlie: [voice cracks] SWEET,

charlie: so i cast darkvision on me, and i now have eyeballs

halvkar: [booming evil voice] It is customary to kneel before a god. charlie: [leans over and puts her middle finger up]

halvkar: You do not need to fear, child. charlie: [shrill] IM FEARING A WHOLE LOT

halvkar: [laughs] charlie: [quietly] oh man, hes got an evil laugh and everything

[giggling during a serious scene bc i accidentally hit the X mark we use to denote dead tokens so charlie just Died for a sec]

charlie dissociates for a hot sec

(pepper stood on my keyboard)

"shes kinda dumb, she has a wisdom score of no"

OH GOD I THINK SIERON JUST GOT POSSESSED

taure: mozzy. time to fart.

SHIT. FUCK. SHIT SHIT SHIT

PLOT ):

jorb: what CAN i do? summer: fart solar: perish! summer: fart

[taure screaming nonsense]

IM CRING, MOZZY CAST THE ULTIMATE FART

THIS IS HOW WE'RE GONNA DEFEAT THE GODKING

solar: can we break the fire bra penn: its a hot bra, can we break it

charlie: [tries to hold sieron's hand, nearly gets burned] WAKE UP, YOU IDIOT! [SMACKS HIM WITH HER QUARTERSTAFF]

also, right before this: summer: [charlie] can't stand up to a smoke fucker.

"[crying] i love this fart"

kaepora is stuck in the fart

"sieron's stuck in a cutscene, it's fine!"

taure: [swings sword through halvkar] FIGHT! ME! YOU! COWARD! [ENTIRE CALL GOES "OOOOOOOOO"]

"its double movement to fly through the fart zone"

charlie: [blows up the brazier] [grins at halvkar] WHAT NOW, BITCH?

CHARLIE AND TAURE KEEP PISSING HALVKAR OFF ITS GREAT

"you have disadvantage, roll again"

HOLY SHIT TAURE CAST "COMPELLED DUEL" ON HALVKAR

AW IT DIDNT WORK

THAT WAS SO FUCKING BALLSY

WE FARTED SOMEONE OUT A WINDOW

thorne: you know what? i can see the other undead from here. thorne, who can snipe anyone they can see: I CAN SEE THE OTHER UNDEAD FROM HERE.

ALL SHALL ENTER THE FART ZONE

charlie: im gonna firebolt the one closest to mozzy. [rolls a 1] FUCK. I DID MY COOL SHIT FOR THE DAY

"kaepora doesnt really want to enter the fart zone,"

FART ZOOOOONE

thorne is just. invisible the whole time btw. and fucking shit up but we cANT SEE THEM

mozzy nearly farted TAURE out the window

literally EVERYONE is calling it the fart zone btw. it is the legitimate term we use.

MOZZY CAN FART INFINITELY

"HE CAN'T ACTUALLY ENTER THE FART ZONE BECAUSE THE FART ZONE IS FULL!"

IM GONNA CRY

"could i combine firebolt and ray of frost to make really hot water?"

"that's a terrible fire! here we go-- oh, that's even worse"

[charlie sits a pew on fire, wonders why she did that]

"solid snake is throwing acid!"

ULTIMATE FART HAS KILLED MORE PEOPLE THAN THE REST OF THE PARTY

MOZZY GOT NAT20 ON HIS FIRST DEATH SAVING THROW :D

i tried to shove an undead into the fire but i rolled a 2

[charlie voice] thats so fucking valid

EVEYRHTING IS ON FIRE

[starts singing tokyo house party] THE FIRE'S SPREAD TO THE BASEMENT NOWWWWWW / TO EVERY PART OF MEEEEE EEE EEEEE

havent been tweeting bc ive been alternating between combat and my cat :V

charlie jumps out a window

time for a mercy kill ):

(uldnvard is the guy we just mercykilled)

[emotional moment] ... charlie: is mozzy on FIRE?

charlie: [serious] you have seen me light shit on fire. i will do it for you.

#leo chirps #txt #dnd #explorers of arvus #THIS IS ONE OF MY FAV SESSIONS #it was so much fun and we all had a lot of good moments #fen hill 2: fen hill harder #[clever queue tag]

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