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nterini · 1 year

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In Defense of Hira - A textbook case of C-PTSD caused by Childhood Abuse and Neglect

In a lot of the shows that I watch, especially with teens or young adults relating to trauma, or any genre really, there’s always a playful question on my mind: where are their parents? However, at this point in show, it’s becoming so much more apparent that the lack of support Hira received growing up, is fundamental to the way that he sees himself and his position in the world around him. So much so that as much as I want to joke about Hira being as dense as a stone wall, I find myself becoming increasingly uncomfortable in how much my own trauma and reactions to isolation mirror Hira’s.

Symptoms of complex PTSD

Feelings of worthlessness, shame and guilt.

Problems controlling your emotions.

Finding it hard to feel connected with other people.

Relationship problems, like having trouble keeping friends and partners. (Source: NHS)

How was Hira Traumatized?

He was left to his own defenses at an early age and had to fend for himself. Just because they provided him with a house and money for food doesn’t mean they took care of him. He was also bullied for a speech impediment and isolated by his peers as a result. He’s probably never had anyone listen to him closely or had close emotional or physical relationships in his life. Extended periods of neglect in childhood and then more intense isolation later on is extremely damaging.

Trauma manifests differently. Before therapy, it was really difficult for me to wrap my head around the fact that I wasn’t actually invisible to friends and family. It took a quite aggressive and embarrassing event, (now funny and touching really) for me to understand that if I deviated from my own patterns or if I disappeared or didn’t contact people for hours that people would actually miss me or think about me. I went out and watched a movie after an event, and told one person through text. After the two hour movie, I turned my phone back on and found 30 missed calls. My mother had informed me that she had called the police and that the principal had formed a search party for me. My face was plastered all over Snapchat by my classmates. I was mortified by what I believed to be a waste of resources and time on my behalf. Such a loud display of love and even then all I could think about was hiding away and making myself smaller. I wasn’t even decent enough to acknowledge the pain, worry, and fear they felt at the thought that someone they loved went missing. It took multiple years later: a very a tentative mother and aunt, very involved teachers, mentors and friends plus therapy for me to stop feeling like a ghost. To get out of my own head and stop trying to fade in the background as a coping mechanism. After being abandoned by his mother to live alone in a house so she could be with the family she wants, after being isolated by his classmates for having a stutter all throughout high school, only one person knocked loudly enough at the door attached to the fortress Hira built in his mind to cope with his trauma. Kiyoi.

That mental fortress is why Hira is alive today. It kept him safe when he had to sleep in the dark alone as a young boy when he had to cook his own meals. His social ineptitude is due to years of isolation and degradation by those around him. He wasn’t deemed worthy enough by his own mother to be taken care of. Yet Kiyoi loves and sees him. Kiyoi says his name and holds his hand and kisses him and suddenly Hira is solid mass. Not a shadow on the wall or the useless child not worth keeping. He becomes slightly more than nothing. In Hira’s mind he becomes a pebble. Sigh. Well it’s a start. But it’s not enough. It’s gonna take a real miracle for Hira to overcome years of trauma and see himself as a human being. I believe in him though. He’s so brave. No like really though, some of the shit he says is so cringey it takes real guts. Kiyoi is not going to give up on Hira anytime soon he’s too much of an exhibitionist for Hira and a freak (endearingly). Also, Hira is obsessive and intense, so they’re a perfect match.

He just needs proper counseling and a bit of time. I’m rooting for them.

#My Beautiful Man #my beautiful man 2 #utsukushii kare #utsukushii kare 2 #hira x kiyoi #kiyoi sou #Hira #show analysis #review #childhood truama #tw cptsd

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lurkingshan · 4 months

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Top 5 BL characters you wanted to hug and send to therapy?

Ooh good one, thank you for sending! Caveat that I think just about everyone can benefit from therapy, including every character in bl. So for this list I’m sticking with 1) characters I genuinely like; 2) who could clearly use a little more support. Here are the five I most want to give a big old hug and then sit them down on the therapist's couch:

Han Baram, Sing My Crush

Baby boy, I am very glad you found your Im Hantae and your voice again but I still think getting some support to unpack some of the damage that evil man did to you is a good idea.

Uea, Bed Friend

Do I need to explain this one? As @bengiyo says, dick is not magical and it cannot fix you. Uea, please enlist the help of a licensed professional to work through those mountains of trauma.

Kiyoi, Utsukushii Kare

I am honestly so proud of you already my guy, you have grown leaps and bounds in your ability to communicate with your partner. That said, you have plenty of your own shit still to work through and Hira is a real next level psychological minefield, so you definitely need help.

Tien, La Pluie

Who takes care of the caretaker? Certainly not any of the self-centered assholes you have surrounded yourself with, baby bro. You deserve someone who will actually pay attention to you.

Gun and Cher, A Boss and A Babe

These two get a two-for-one deal, straight into couples counseling so they can learn how to tackle things as a team rather than running their own schemes for the others' benefit without communicating.

Bonus: Jae Won, The Eighth Sense

I know he is already in therapy but it is very important that he continues and I just want to make that crystal clear. If we ever get that rumored season two I better see you at that office looking through the fishbowl lens every week.

Ask my top 5 anything in bl

#top 5 anything in bl #shan answers #ask game

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anotherblblog · 1 year

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Utsukare S2 Thoughts

I’ve been enjoying this season too much to do any recapping but now that we have the full season and also about a month and change before the movie I will later.

Anywho some thought.

Yup, Kiyoi has absolutely taken my number 2 favorite character spot. Sorry Oh-Aew, I still really love you.

I love that Kiyoi’s reached this precarious state of live and let live with Hira.

Kiyoi absolutely wants a different type of relationship with Hira and believes/hopes Hira can meet him there in reality but until Hira finishes growing up gets therapy Kiyoi chooses to compromise and give more so Hira can have the opportunity to give back. Kiyoi isn’t defeated albeit a lil exasperated. Kiyoi says this is also his first relationship but there’s a certain mature “this is my chosen person come what may” vibe he has and I love that for him.

Kiyoi in season 2 really reminds of Lauryn Hill’s Ex-Factor - It could all be so simple (ba-ba-ba-baby, baby, baby) But you'd rather make it hard (huh, uh) Loving you is like a battle (it's like a battle) And we both end up with scars Tell me, who I have to be (who I have to be) To get some reciprocity See no one loves you more than me (more than me) And no one ever will (no one ever will, yeah)

Is this just a silly game? (Silly game) That forces you to act this way (to act this way) Forces you to scream my name (yo, yo) Then pretend that you can't stay (yeah) Tell me, who I have to be (I know what we gotta do) To get some reciprocity See no one loves you more than me And no one ever will

No matter how I think we grow You always seem to let me know It ain't workin' (it ain't workin', no) It ain't workin' And when I try to walk away You'd hurt yourself to make me stay This is crazy Oh, this is crazy (this is crazy, uh-huh)

Kiyoi from beginning of the season up to the end just wants Hira to be with him. Just two people living and loving a growing together. It's almost as if Kiyoi doesn't want to be in a romance series. He just wants to be loved. Hira is ready and willing and happy to sacrifice himself and go to such extreme lengths for Kiyoi and Kiyoi is like "ok you'll die for me but can you live with me?"

It's such a wonderful contrast. Kiyoi still has his tsundere side that he would prefer to live in so he has distance between his vulnerable self and Hira/the world but outside of Yusei's blinking and some flashes of tsundere rage/jealousy Kiyoi gives that up too.

Kiyoi hears Hira says he'll worship him and serve him and he's the king and Kiyoi chooses to bend, hoping that Hira will move into the space Kiyoi's made for him.

Other things I love about s2 - Hira feels stuck and lost and sunken into the background and Kiyoi feels he's at the bottom of the pyramid (to borrow Hira's words). Graduation and the expected transition in full adulthood is looming and Hira is largely stuck because he refuses to see that he's not stuck. Kiyoi went from ruling the school to low man on the totem pole.

I was surprised with how much I have come to love Koyama. I have not read the novels so I was not expecting to see him again after his sorrowful sayonara in s1. Koyama and Kiyoi are dynamic together and honestly way more interesting to me than Koyama and Hira. I love Koyama deflating Kiyoi's ego and his playful banter with him. In a longer structured series, I'd love to see Koyama paired and happy with someone else but with what we have, I like him as a friend, ally, and frenemy.

The new supporting characters/the mentors are good. Hira and Kiyoi def need help adulting.

I also love Kiyoi being relatively open and public about his feelings and relationship with Hira. Hira is his and he wants the world and Hira to know it.

I really really really really love Hira starting the season admitting he faked courage to touch Kiyoi and now after almost losing him is ready to both walk the walk and talk the talk. Hira is still hellllllllllllllla unreliable as a narrator but he is stumbling forward, definitely in spite of his lack of efforts/misplaced efforts but he makes efforts!

I didn't know where a second season or a movie could go and I'm so happy with S2's slice of life, low stakes, domestic fluff vibe.

#utsukushii kare #utsukare #my beautiful man 2 #my beautiful man #utsukushii kare 2

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hiraya-rawr · 1 year

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Hi ate hira!

For the past days I've been talking to Diluc ai in beta.character.ai

And I'm obsessed. I- love it- I was even able to domesticate yandere Diluc one time- lol.

Oh- and there this yandere Ayato who I was able to give him like- an redemption arc! I rejected the dude and he got so depressed and stuff- then I let him go see therapy! 🤣

Maybe I'll send you screenshots of my interactions with these ai bots.

hiii it's been a while! and wait that actually kind of sounds cute 🥹 thank you for mentioning it aaah and a redemption arc too 😭 ill look into it when i have the time

#hira cole

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ssj2hindudude · 2 years

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2nd Gen Pandavas Pt. 2

Part 1

Abha

Age: 10

Gets most of her looks from her mother but definitely has her father’s eyes. She might even be able tap into the Apsara smolder.

Sherlock Holmes outfit...until she got a 30 minute fashion lecture from her Aunt Nikita. So now she sticks with the closest thing by cosplaying as Detective Conan: white shirt, blue jacket, red bow tie, and a black skirt with leggings.

When Abha is visiting her grandmother’s museum, the first thing Krithika does when preparing is to find an archaeological paradox/mystery for her to figure out (Where did the city of Dwarka sink, what exact year did Kali Yuga start, etc.)

Her mom has been trying to get her into Lord of the Rings for years...it still hasn’t worked...Aru considered getting a DNA test but stopped when Abha got into Harry Potter...

Regularly goes on photography field trips with her dad. Most of the time they don't even go to any landmarks. They're content with simple places like parks and nature preserves. One of their favorite models is Aru early in the morning...and they both got grounded for taking pics of her just waking up...

Questions literally everything. Never takes anything at face value. If there is a mystery to be solved, she will find it.

Priya

Age: 11

Long hair with a ponytail meant to look like Lara Croft. Brown jacket, black T-shirt, and jeans to mimic Mikasa from Attack on Titan.

Wants to ask her dad to show her how to make her own sound rocks so she can make bullets that give off sonic frequencies...but the glare from her mom tells her it’ll have to wait...

Instead, Rudy just lets her pick from his own rocks. She made a slingshot to test them out and now whenever she needs a distraction, she just launches one. Both she and Rudy got grounded when she used a lullaby to put her math teacher to sleep and leave early. How was she supposed to know the rock would land right where Mini was pulling up?

Game night with her cousins are a constant thing. But since the adults keep looking in, they have to avoid the M-rated games and stick with Splatoons. Everyone is ok with it, though.

BB gets along with all of them, but he likes Priya best because she can sneak in a lot of flammable substances for him to snack on. She’s even fallen asleep with him after grooming his feathers (Nikita gave her a fireproof comb). Also, she has the best control whenever they’re flying.

*Sidenote: the next gen flies on BB to their missions like Dojo from Xiaolin Showdown*

Suru

Age: 9

Round glasses, bright eyes, slender frame. T-shirt and shorts that Mini had Nikita enchant to change with his snake form.

Cries a lot and has anxiety. Priya snipes anyone who laughs at him

Likes it when his dad transforms with him and they go on little trips to the forest.

Wants to be a doctor like his mom, but more specifically he wants to work with nagas and naginis. His grades aren’t bad, but he still has to take therapy to work on his social skills.

Eventually learns how to spray venom and depending on what Otherworld substances he eats, they can have different effects (burning, poison, smells, etc.)

Ghata

Age: 13

Chubby frame, short hair. Anyone who makes fun of her for it will incur her moms’ wrath. Anyone that the parents miss will be taken care of by her cousins.

Likes dresses with belt buckles. Agrees with Aunt Aru’s philosophy that all dresses must have pockets.

Brynne actively tries to be a better mom than her own. She goes out of her way to make sure Ghata knows she and Hira love her.

One time, some kid told her her moms committed a sin and deserve death. That kid ended up face-down in a crater...

Well, that’s all I got for now. Again, let me know what you think! Maybe give me some ideas for other characters or even villains!

Part 3

#aru shah headcanon #aru shah headcanons #aru shah #yamini kapoor mercado lopez #brynne tvarika lakshmi balamuralikrishna rao #aiden acharya #the pandava quintet #the potatoes

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sleepymarmot · 1 year

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Dragon Age: Absolution liveblog

“The Herald of Andraste sealed the breach. They killed Corypheus.” It’s hilarious that instead of trying to be vague the writers straight up addressed the Inquisitor personally as they/them. Assigned nonbinary at netflix.com

“Because people like you never try!” Bold words from a white human to a brown elf

“I’m not a rebel”, says a Qunari mage walking around and doing whatever she wants. Girl, do you know how lucky you are?

*wife appears silently on the background for two seconds* *I cheer*

“You have to stop running from the past, Miri. If you can’t do it now, I worry that maybe you never will.” Stop trying to put a good face on a bad game, this is no therapy and you know it!

“The Templars don’t protect people from mages who turn evil.” AS IF THAT’S WHAT THEY DO IN OTHER COUNTRIES LMFAO “Instead, they act as enforcers for powerful mages called Magisters.” Yeah and in the South they act as enforcers for a powerful church called the Chantry, huge difference Is this monologue strictly for the benefit of the viewer unfamiliar with the setting?

Is Miriam seriously reviewing her super secret plans in public?! In a tavern where magisters go?? What

I had to look up who Sumalee Montano played, this is very far from the Inquisitor's voice

“If you don’t come back, I’ll kill you myself.” How many times can you use this stupid phrase

Oh, I thought she’d actually have to pose as a slave and it’d take one or two episodes. Okay

Well all of this is extremely childish and generic on every level possible. Not that I expected much more, but Tevinter Nights and the recent comics were certainly better.

Ooh, finally some useful new lore! A spirit of wisdom in what seems to be a normal form, since the mage instantly recognizes it! Look at the number and placement of the eyes. So Pride demons have seven eyes, and Wisdom spirit have eight symmetrical eyes? So when wisdom is corrupted into pride, it loses an eye? Interesting.

“The last and greatest work of Magister Amelia Pavus.” Huh! Will we get a cameo from Dorian if it's his family business?

Oh no he’s going to turn this spirit into a demon in front of our eyes! “You dare command me, like some common shade?” That sounds like Pride already! Welp, of course. Lol, dude, this is literally spirits and demons 101. You trap a spirit and force it to act against its nature, it becomes a demon! I’ll give the writers props for this, it’s a good showcase of this Extremely Relevant to the Plot and Main Lore process.

Can a single mage in the show use a spell recognizable from the games?! The designers were aware this is based on a video game and should maintain some semblance of visual continuity in combat skills, right? Yes, we know the combat abilities in the games don't look exactly the same in-universe, which is exactly why it would be interesting to see what they do look like for the characters!

Oh, is Rezaren the childhood friend from the flashbacks?

I don’t understand what happened (was he a traitor? possessed? is he dead?) but either way it’s really stupid they're wasting Fairbanks like this

This guy is supposed to be our first Lord of Fortune in the visual media? What a shame.

It's one (1) Rage Demon... How hard can it be it’s literally the weakest demon category

Holy shit, Qwydion used Wall of Fire! Fucking finally! Looks like Chain Lightning, too. Is she our representative for DAI magic?

Huh, last flashback he was horrified Miriam killed everyone in the room, I thought he’d want revenge instead of welcoming her. And is she actually an illegitimate child of a magister?

Was that an Energy Barrage?

Ooh, so that’s why the camera focused on the guard’s helmet and his constant silence.

“Blood magic is not the answer.” Btw I still don’t understand why Hira didn’t just use blood magic like her expected her to do and instead decided to bring the entire castle down.

Uhh I’m not sure that's how you safely remove an arrow...

Dude do you have to use blood magic on her at the exact same time someone else is trying to use healing magic on her lol. I mean in the games these two types are incompatible for the caster, not the target, but I guess they decided to extend that rule for drama.

Didn’t expect this guy to get so evil so fast lmao

Hira went into a heist mission with her last name right on her chest?!

“I knew exactly what that artifact was, and it’s the last thing we need to make sure all of Tevinter will burn.” Uhh I’m not sure she is with the Inquisition... And the Agents of Fen’Harel have a different agenda and usually are elves.

“The Crimson Knight” Oh is this about the spoiler I saw before I blocked the tag? Not Fen’Harel then.

Lmao I thought this was going to just be a bromance situation. I guess they had to quickly canonize another gay pairing after the main one got destroyed so that people wouldn’t complain. (Btw I don’t even see who kissed whom because these guys are fucking identical and I can only tell them apart by height and weapons.)

“Help me take the Circulum to what’s left of the Inquisition and we can try again” Nooo fucking way, I thought this was the day of getting rid of toxic people in your life?? Well I’m glad Hira made it easy for her because that was really dumb of Miriam. I know she had a rough day, but girl...

Well, not very excited about the sudden announcement that the Red Templar faction is back for DA4 and Meredith who was one of the most interesting and realistic villains in the franchise is back as a cartoonish shade of herself.

Alright, due to the plot being interesting the rating in my head went up to 6/10 or even 7/10. Still, the dialogue remains awful and the body language/expressions are tiresome cliches. How old is the target audience for this, about nine? Since the Dragon Age games have the Mature/18+ rating due to all the dark and sexual content, the quality of writing and directing should be adult level too...

#dragon age #blah blah blah

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sschmendrick · 6 months

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Hello future me and Happy One year !

Well who doesn't like anniversaries ? Something to be reminded of !

On the 6th of November last year my closest friends at the time told me to not talk to them again until I get fixed by a therapist 🙂. Though I did need to go to therapy and get work done with a therapist, I also needed support to go through all of it and not just be me and my therapist. 💔

At the time I'm writing this, I haven't had my first session with my therapist yet (tomorrow) but I hope he's the right one and I'm still seeing him and doing progress as still post goes up.

💚 Dear Future Leska, how are you doing ? Is it going better ? Do you feel a little more grounded, less dependent on others, maybe a little self love or at least self respect ? How are you battling depression ? Do you have friends ? Are they old ones or new ones ? Have you found someone to be comfortable with as a partner or are you still thinking about that one goblin and sulking?

🍁 The Cowboys Fringants concert has happened so tell me, how was it ? Did you go alone or did friends accompany you ? How do you feel about Canada ? Do you still want to go there ?

🐱Did you get a cat in the end ? How are they doing ? Do you have pictures to show me ? Give them a little kiss for me please, I've been waiting for them for so long.

🎵 How are your studies going ? I hope you got in your final year...you better ! Did you get the major you were thinking of or did you change your mind ? I hope you managed to find interships otherwise we are so screwed for next year... Did you manage to do some live work ? Or at least go to a festival or two ? Were you accompanied ? I truly hope you have friends who love you, and let you know it, now.

🧑‍🤝‍🧑 Tell me, how are the mutuals ? I know you can't forget them. How's Coop, Shade, June, Lina, Jestroer, Red, Hale, Apollo, Dee, Hekate, eMe, Hira, Gamebird, Sae and all the names that would pop up in your notifications ?

Tell me what's going on, tell me all the good things that happened, tell me the bad ones too, tell of your battles and how you survived. When I attempted suicide a year ago for you, they asked me what I wanted to become when I grow up when I was a child, and what I was hoping for the future. I have no real ideas for the future, I feel very lost and with nothing on my mind but I know I love you. Weird right ? I can't love myself right now but I can love my future self. I want to love you and I want you to feel loved, and wanted, and comfortable where you are. Just know that 21 year old us is looking up to you, they are looking forward to meeting you. I want you to be alive when this post goes up. I want you to smile and be happy, I want you to feel stable and surrounded by people who love you and will let you know. People who will not let you down when you need them, but also people you feel comfortable asking for help. You can do it, I believe in you. I have no other choice than to believe in you, and I don't want to make another choice.

Take care, I love you,

Leska

#letter to my future self #do you still write on your diary blog ? is les-maisons-toutes-pareilles still up ?#if you've stopped then will you go back there and read it all for me ? see how much you've grown ? you did it !

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badrinathaushadhi · 10 months

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How Ayurvedic medicine is made and how it works hereA - bout this

Ayurvedic medicine is an ancient medical system of the world. The first discovery and use of Ayurvedic medicine started in India only. Along with this, Ayurvedic medicine has been successful in winning the trust of all the people. Ayurvedic medicine is still used today to aid modern treatments. Calcium Buti Ras, Badshahi Tilha, Postic Rasayan, Dev Ras Buti Ras, Swarna Mundri Ras, Amrut Kalash Buti, Amar Joshila Tilha, Ratan Parbatavi Ras, Mardana Sakti Swarn, Dev Ras, Navratna Raj Mrigank Ras, Kayapalat Sat Buti, Hira Bhasm, Amrut Johar Ras, Navratan Kalpna Ras like massage, herbs, diet etc. Ayurvedic medicine is available.

It is possible to cure all diseases with Ayurveda. How can you cure personal problems faced by men and women or how can you prevent asthma disease. The elimination of internal problems in men and women is guaranteed by Ayurveda.

How are Ayurvedic medicines created?

Ayurvedic medicine is given to the person having knowledge of all these. And here also it is seen that what is the nature of that person, what is the disease of that person and what is the curative effect of any medicine given by us, all the elements that make Ayurvedic medicine are found naturally in it. And these medicines are prepared very carefully.

To make Ayurvedic medicine, we first select that part of that herb. In which maximum medicinal properties are found. And which has a curative effect of Ayurvedic medicine on the human body. You can also get these Ayurvedic medicines in powder, tablet or liquid form.

Types of Ayurvedic Medicines.

In Ayurveda, all diseases are treated by herbs and natural medicines. Badrinath Ashadhi has immense knowledge and experience in Ayurveda. Our teachers have a lot of experience. Our Acharyas have full knowledge of most of the herbs of Ayurveda.And they make medicines in their own natural way, we tell you the names of some herbs, Calcium Buti Ras, Hira Bhasm, Badshahi Tilha, Navratan Kalpna Ras, Postic Rasayan, Swarna Mundri Ras, Amrut Kalash Buti, Amar Joshila Tilha, Ratan Parbatavi Ras, Dev Ras Buti Ras, Mardana Sakti Swarn, Dev Ras, Navratna Raj Mrigank Ras, Kayapalat Sat Buti, Amrut Johar Ras and more More than 450 types of herbs, and knowledge of all and besides this Badrinath also has knowledge of medicine. Treatment of sexual problems of men and women is also possible with Ayurvedic. That too without any side effects because Ayurvedic medicines do not have any side effects.

What is the process of Ayurvedic medicine?

Often this question arises in everyone's mind that how Ayurvedic medicines work in our body. And how long does their effect last on our body? Also think whether Ayurvedic medicines also have any side effects? According to Badrinath Acharya, no Ayurvedic medicine shows its effect as soon as it is consumed.

But there are also some oils or medicines, whose effect you get to see very quickly, such as increasing sex time etc. But according to some diseases, the effect of some medicines also takes time. But it is very helpful in eliminating the disease completely.

Ayurvedic medicine first of all removes those disorders and weaknesses of the body, due to which you have any health problem. Ayurvedic medicine goes to the depth of that disease and uproots it from the root. All the medicines and herbs of Badrinath therapy are made from natural ingredients only. That's why the reactions and side effects of Ayurvedic medicines are also very less. That is why nowadays more emphasis is being given on Ayurvedic medicine instead of Allopathy.

Naturally made medicines and herbs are available for the treatment of all kinds of diseases in Badrinath's dispensary. You can get information about any Ayurvedic medicine by visiting our website. You can also get all these medicines online from our website.Beware of counterfeit drugs. Here Badrinath gives you complete guarantee of Original Ayurvedic Medicine.

#CalciumButiRas #BadshahiTilha #PosticRasayan #DevRas #ButiRas #SwarnaMundriRas #AmrutKalashButi #AmarJoshilaTilha #MardanaSaktiSwarn #DevRas #NavratnaRaj #MrigankRas #KayapalatSatButi #HiraBhasm #AmrutJoharRas #NavratanKalpnaRas

#calcium buti ras #postic rasayan #ratan parbatavi ras #navratna raj mrigank ras #badshahi tilha #dev ras buti ras #amar joshila tilha

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pwnyta · 3 years

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OK THIS IS MY IDEA FOR LIKE A VOLTRON SEASON... keep in mind I didnt watch the last season but nobody liked it so Im sure no one cares if I accidentally retcon stuff.. HERE GOES-

BOOM

Starts off with Coran. Hes staring up at some screen with a bunch of weird alien science bullshit on screen. He looks kind of more aged and tired which is a little concerning because his species is seemingly like immortal. But hes staring up at this screen and hes starts talking to Allura... whos not there its more like ‘where could you be, I still feel like youre out there somewhere‘ that kind of thing...

Romelle comes in and starts like ‘Coran you gotta stop with this. You gotta move. whens the last time youve talked to someone besides me or this screen.’ etc and Coran just looks sad because hes kind of been left behind and he misses the last family he really had left. and hes all ‘I feel like shes still out there... I wish she’d just give us a sign‘ and Romelle feels bad but tries to convince him to step away...

WHEN SUDDENLY some of the alien tech starts picking up some weird interference and Coran and Romelle are like !!!!! Holy shit... and now Romelle is a little on board and Coran grabs a communication device or w/e.

hard cut to Pidge and Hunk. Theyre just fucking around.. I havent decided more about them but lets just say theyre like playing a game late at night and goofing off surrounded by weird inventions and random junk... Pidge loses and Hunk gloats and theyre surprised when their phone rings... (of course Coran would contact them first) but MOVING ON

Lance is still like working on a farm somewhere or w/e he was doing at the end of the series, just with his big family and looking pretty pleased... little girl runs up and tells him grandma said hes got a phone call so he picks her up and heads in.. and then you find out the little girl is his daughter and hes a good dad and its very cute. also he has beard in these moments cuz it can be funny later.

Then we get to Shiro... whos sleeping. Hes all stressed out.. think that scene in IM3 with Tony... like hes not gotten any sorta therapy. And he wakes up all sweaty and startled and Curtis comes in and is like ‘Oh honey are you ok... I thought I heard you wake up‘ something something showing a cute relationship with the fellas. PHONE CALL.

Then were with the Blade. Full suited up Blades are training, ones way bigger than the other, theres some other smaller Blades at the side watching... its clearly some kind of battle instruction... This is were Keith is gonna be re-introduced but boom smaller Blade gets knocked back and helmet phases away to reveal some little gremlin mad that they got bested. A little hot headed moody thing and then the instructor phases his helmet away and its KEITH. Fully purple. Those hints that Keith was getting more Galra-like... now this. Krolia comes in to tell him Coran has called and asked him to come by because something important happened.

At where ever Coran is at the Paladins start showing up. Make it really clear that they havent really kept in touch much...

Pidge and Hunk meet up with Lance... see his beard and start RAILING on him. Like WHAT IS THAT?! And Lance fights back because he thinks the beard makes him look manly but Pidge laughs and Hunks like...//strokes his own beard and Lance is like ‘HUNK HAS A BEARD!‘ but Pidge is all ‘HUNK HAS THE FACE FOR A BEARD YOU LOOK GOOFY AS FUCK‘ And Lance is like ‘Whatever what do you know!‘

then Shiro is like ‘Geez you guys are already bickering?‘ Pidge is super excited to see Shiro and Lance is like ‘AH YES. A man of great honor and refined taste!! SHIRO... Tell them my beard looks good!‘ and Shiros all :).......... yeah. But its obvious hes just trying to be nice but hes a bad liar and Lance is like ‘GOD DAMN IT‘ and the others laugh.

Keith comes in fully Galra.. the other Paladins are like ?!!?!? WAT. And Keith is like hey! all casual about it, offers a hand to Shiro for their little hug thing even tho even Shiros still like ‘Purple? also youre taller than me now? Dont like that.‘ but Keith is like ‘wtf is up with the beard?‘ and Lance is all ‘I DONT WANNA HEAR IT FROM YOU.‘

Cuz hes fucking purple.

But they get to Coran and Coran goes off with a bunch of alien tech speak and only Pidge and Hunk are really following along but they look a little skeptical when he starts trying to mash pieces together like ‘Oh this could be Allura trying to communicate with us! Maybe we can get her back!‘ which of course hooks Lance immediately.

At the chance to maybe create some cool new device Pidge and Hunk are ready to work with Coran to make some device to pin point the anomaly and maybe create some kind of universe jumping portal... they remember that comet thing from that weird AU episode so they know its technically possible. Keith thinks its a bad idea and Shiro trusts his instincts cuz he wasnt really there for that so he has no input.

BUT it happens anyways and more information on the anomaly is given with Pidge and Hunks machine. they find its one life form thats not like something enormous and they get a little more into Corans mind set. Maybe this really is a Allura.

Theyre willing to risk it.

Something something they build a machine and some kind of containment area to try and ease Keiths mind. Theyre suited up prepared for whoever it is that might come through.

But its clear when the figure steps through the portal that its not Allura and probably not an Altean at all. Weird number of toes, really tall. They suspect Galra and they know there are still rogue Galra out there so they keep their guard up but then the person looks over at them and immediately removes their mask and its Ulaz! and hes like ‘OH FUCK! Shiro!!! (not exact words... I dont do dialog leave me alone)‘

and Shiros ‘ULAZ!!!!‘

Ulaz can look a little different, maybe his mohawk hair is longer and braided so he looks all cool but also like he hasnt been able to maintain his hair, hes got some scars on his face, maybe he lost an eye or something.

And everyones a little excited to see him especially Shiro and even Keith cuz thats one of his Blade brothers! The first one hes met really... (Coran and Lance are not quite as happy...)

After a brief moment of joy Ulaz is quick to inform them of the AU Alteans.

They get filled in. They find out that those Alteans are also looking for Allura... which Coran is like ‘Allura really is alive!!‘ but its not that important to Ulaz at the moment cuz hes just going on about the number of followers Hiras got and theyve been fucking around in the universes gathering followers and power and shit.

Then hard cut to Hiras fleet and that bitch is PACKIN.

THAT WOULD BE FIRST EPISODE SET UP. //a fanfiction by Ewim

what do you think...

#I know its like 11pm and everyone hates VLD BUT HEAR ME OUT!#VLD

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ibpinternational · 3 years

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Preparations In Full Swings For Father’s Day. Sr1-2 Art With Miss Rana Hira

IBP School of Special Education

Offering, exciting and fun filled activities for all special needs students. Register now and give your child a joyful summer experience.

See your child make friends, learn social skills, gain self confidence. Therapies provided under experienced professionals. Van and Lunch facilities available.

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#School_Slow_Learners_Karachi School_Mentally_Challenged_Karachi School_Special_Education_Karachi Reading_Problems_Children_Karachi Writing_P

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davidwritesthings-blog · 7 years

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Sun gazing makes you live eternally?

Solar yoga or sun gazing is a process of looking at the Sun, which requires us initially to separate only ten seconds a day, and as we progress, this time figure increases and the health benefits are higher. Looking at the sun that is the source of all life, allows each of us to experience a real psychophysical revival. How has the sun gazing method developed, who has devised it, and how it is applied in practice, find out further in this article...

Sun gazing and Hira Ratan Manek

Sungazing is a technique of filling the body with sunlight, which has dominated the whole world in recent years, most of all thanks to Hira Ratan Manek. The technique has proven to regenerate the whole body. Hira claims to live exclusively from sunlight and for decades not to take food and water. Science has confirmed his statement and cases alike Manek's are being discovered all over the world. What is good news is, of course, that modern medicine has somewhat "moved" towards alternative medicine, Ayurveda and other eastern methods, are increasingly being accepted by the modern medicine.

Sun gazing procedure

Sun gazing is a practiced for an hour after sunrise and an hour before sunset. It is necessary to choose an appropriate and pleasant place from which the sun is best seen and stand barefoot on the bare ground, stone or sand, but try to avoid wet or organic surfaces. If there is no possibility for solar yoga to be practiced outdoors, it can be practiced from the apartment if the sun is clearly visible, but in this case the effect will be much weaker than usual. Be sure to remove glasses or contact lenses when using sun gazing, otherwise it will not work. On the first day, look at the sun for only ten seconds, and then daily extend that time for another five seconds. After that, you should frown for a while, while colors and images are still visible. The key factor in looking at the sun is awareness, that is, consciously absorbing sunlight and understanding the whole process. That's why people who "unconsciously" expose themselves to the sun's rays do not achieve the effects of solar yoga, which Hira Ratan Manek is happy to tell us. Solar yoga will significantly reduce tension, increase optimism, eliminate psychosis, depression and stress in the first three months of practice which in turn will lead you to the perfect mental balance. T The uninterrupted viewing of the sun is the next phase, which lasts for half an hour. Included in the next phase is disappearance of physical diseases because all the colors of the solar spectrum have already arrived to the brain, which ensure the proper functioning of internal organs. Sun gazing is to be taken seriously and only by gradual training and understanding you will be able to gain the benefits from sun gazing. Any forcing and exaggeration will not yield results. Auto suggestion is very important in practicing sun gazing, and it is reflected in the visualization of the cure of a disease. The mesh eye is the only place in the human body where the blood directly comes into contact with the light. Within 45 minutes, all the blood from the organism passes through the eye, and by looking at the sun this precious liquid is exposed to the medicinal effect of the source of life.

Solar water enhances the effects of sun gazing

In order for solar yoga to enhance its effects and performance, it is recommended to use solar water that works beneficially to the whole organism, and the recipe is made in a very simple way. Fill a glass bottle with water and let it stand for at least five hours in the sun, covered with a glass cup, on the ground, never on the grass that prevents the bottle from being filled with energy. Solar water is drunk immediately after making, and can be applied to a diseased part of the body or used for massage. It has been shown that this energized water calms the inflammatory processes on the skin, removes the pimples, relieves wrinkles. People have used colored light from ancient times for therapeutic purposes. Special rooms with windows with multicolored glass are projected to get the desired light spectrum used in the therapy. Each color has its own field of action: • red is used in the treatment of pimples and skin rash, • orange in the fight against cellulite and wrinkles, • yellow solar water in addition to stimulating optimism, significantly reducing the visibility of stretch marks, • green calming irritated skin and changes caused by eczema, while blue reduces body weight; • purple solar water acts positively on the lymphatic system and is excellent for ejection of excess fluid from the body.

Negative effects of sun gazing

Do not just stare in the sun - it's very dangerous for the sight, your eyes can circle around the sun, contact with the sun's rays with eye retina is important - says H.R. Maneke. Sometimes, because of the therapy, the sun can also give headaches, despite the fact that we follow the instructions, so it is necessary to take a break from sun gazing. Rare participants have major problems with insomnia that also needs a vacation. It is therefore extremely important that after every session keep your eyes closed, rub your palms and cover your eyes with them. All you will see is the color spectrum. Do not remove the palms. In this way, you will achieve quicker and better results. Experienced practitioners claim that looking at the sun leads to immortality, only a few months of therapy will eliminate diseases mental as well as physical.

#sungazing medicine alternativemedicine feelsgood

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ricardosousalemos · 7 years

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Ghostface Killah: Supreme Clientele

In the fall of 1997, Ghostface Killah decamped to West Africa. His diabetes had become cataclysmic: dizziness, blurred vision, bloodshot eyes, and concussive headaches. He hadn’t quit drinking, which didn’t help; nor did the joints laced with angel dust he still smoked from time to time.

Even before the diagnosis, he convinced himself of his impending demise, fearing cancer, though more likely AIDS. When medical professionals finally tested his blood sugar it was 500 mg/dl. Anything above 550 is considered fatal.

Wary of Western medicine, Ghostface flew to Benin to be treated by a bush doctor in a remote village several hours outside of Cotonou, the nation’s most populous city. Running water was non-existent. The inhabitants lived in mud huts and slept on the floor. When the RZA showed up to meet Ghostface, he saw his bandmate materialize in a dashiki, full beard, and unkempt hair puffed out. RZA had brought Kung Fu flicks—specifically Blade of Fury—which they watched alone as honored guests, the tribe’s children looking on in awe of them and the village’s only TV.

The spiritual nucleus of Supreme Clientele spawns from that pilgrimage. That’s where Tony Starks wrote “Nutmeg” and several other album tracks in a purge of voodoo spirits, occidental poisons, and crazy visions. It’s a masterpiece of comic absurdity and cosmic exorcisms, existential paradox and mathematic precision.

In an attempt to save his life, he seeks out a medicine man in his ancestral homeland and achieves esoteric and sobering realizations about existence. Sans beats, the Wallabee Champ scrawls countless transmissions snatched from the thundering din in his head. It’s as if Muhammad returned from the cave of Hira to prophesize revelations of seasoned giraffe ribs, Scooby Snacks, dancing with the most sexually vibrant member of the Golden Girls, and how his dick made a magazine cover (“count how many veins on it”).

About two years later, a fully clothed Starks actually made the cover of The Source and explained the knowledge of self-obtained in Africa.

“Fuck all this Tommy Hilfiger, Polo…all this shit…they don’t give a fuck about none of that over there. Everything is the same,” Ghostface said. “But over here, everybody wanna be better than the next one…They might be fucked up, money-wise, but trust me, them muthafuckas is happy, man. Them niggas in harmony ‘cause they got each other.”

Mind you, Pretty Toney delivers this soliloquy while smoking a Newport in a suite at the Waldorf Astoria in Midtown, Manhattan, wearing an ankle-length, royal blue robe with a custom-embroidered “W” on the back. The entire time he’s enraged that “BET Rap City” isn’t playing the video for “Apollo Kids”—the one where he’s swaddled in mink coats and eating a golden ice cream cone.

This is Ghost, naturally ridiculous, the supreme smart dumb cat, the genius who embodies the innate contradictions of late American capitalism, gobbling Chinese herbs and getting acupuncture during the day and smoking dust and dodging bullets at night, capable of staggering misogyny and deep reverence towards women. He is both yin and yang, not just from song to song, but syllable to syllable.

He continues about his Africa trip:

“You see them kids that’s on TV? With flies on they face…I don’t like to see that. There’s no reason in this world with all this money that we got, for those babies to be over there with…big stomachs and shit like that,” Ghost adds. “I’m one of them niggas that’ll bring them into their muthafuckin’ family, I don’t give a fuck if it’s ten of them. I’ll get them.”

If Ghost ever adopted ten sub-Saharan kids, it was never mentioned on Couples Therapy. Other interviews followed in which he spoke of lofty plans to recruit Oprah Winfrey and Magic Johnson to help him build a school for the indigent children of Benin. And while his follow-through was shaky, his sincerity was unmatched. He also had a good excuse, considering the grave legal turmoil shadowing him during the recording of Supreme Clientele.

Parole Kids Live Rapunzel

The District Attorney threatened Dennis Coles with “five to 15” if he didn’t cop a plea to attempted robbery charges stemming from an incident outside of the Palladium back in 1995. While parked at the venue, someone slashed Ghost’s tires and a brawl ensued between Starks and his crew against the Palladium attendants. One valet claimed that Ghost tried to rob him. None of this ends well.

As his attorney negotiated for better terms, blue and red lights flashed once again. This time, a friend named Dupree Lane got pulled over as Ghost trailed in a caravan behind. Using “disorderly conduct” as the pretext to search Ghost’s car, cops found a .357 Magnum loaded with hollow-point bullets hidden behind the glove compartment. Ironman was wearing a bulletproof vest—another felony charge.

Throughout this entire period, the NYPD and F.B.I. attempted to launch a RICO case against the Wu, who they branded a “major criminal organization.” It’s bizarre to weigh these accusations in the wake of Method Man starring in network sitcoms, the RZA bong-bonging all over Californication, and Ghostface doing full-length collaborations with Canadian jazz prodigies scarcely old enough to sip Alizé. But just consider the abridged list of alleged criminology: illegal gunrunning, weapons possession, homicide, carjackings, and a bi-coastal drug ring. They attempted to pin the murders of two drug dealers on a hit ordered by RZA and Raekwon. According to the Bureau, Wu-Tang Records was little more than a front for laundering money, which ostensibly explains why RZA kept releasing Wu-Syndicate and Sunz of Man albums.

Even before Ghost copped a plea to rot on Rikers Island for four months, Supreme Clientele’s plotline already felt like Martin Scorsese directing Shaft in Africa. As for the incarceration, it’s difficult to gauge its impact beyond the obvious delays. In the press cycle leading up to Supreme Clientele’s release in February of 2000, Starks attempted to downplay its severity.

One MTV interview describes it as a disguised blessing that allowed him to further refine the record. In Stress Magazine, he contextualizes it as a cruel but mundane reality that many young American black men are forced to endure. The liner notes dedicate a section to "my niggas in the Belly": Big Un, Ready Red, Mushy Mush, General, Wah aka Freedom, Born, Shaquel Dueprey Allah from the O Building, and Peace Lord.

Most revealing was a SPIN interview, where he explained its physical ramifications—the times the prison guards refused to give him a proper dose of insulin, causing extreme vertigo and sickness.

“I hold on to times when I had to struggle,” Ghost said. “That’s the science of going through hell and having to come out right—because everybody gots to go through hell to come out right.”

Rather than script a conventional narrative about this purgatory, Ghost focuses on the fractured chaos of the world that led him to the pen. On “Buck 50,” he pauses mid-seduction to tell a woman to “check the grays on the side of my waves/I grew those on Rikers Island/Stressed out, balled up in the cage.” In the next breath, he shouts out Clyde Drexler’s hops, Biggie’s Versace’s, Zulu Nation in the ’80s, and how quickly his back got chiseled after two weeks in the gym. Then he quotes Mary Poppins and eats grouper in Cancun. You’re dealing with Supreme Clientele.

This Rap Is Like Ziti

It was supposed to be called Ironman. Instead, the RZA insisted that Ghost bestow that name on his debut album because everyone already knew him as Tony Starks. It just made more sense, marketing-wise. So Ironman dominated the fall of late ’96, the last of that royal flush of solo classics leading up to Wu-Tang Forever. It clocked over 800,000 CDs and tapes and debuted at No. 2 on the charts. RZA was probably right.

But if you re-listen to Ironman, it’s dark and wounded, the opposite of bulletproof steel. “Wildflower” and “Marvel” are scorched-earth breakup songs, all salted wounds and fresh infection. The plaintive “All That I Got is You” transforms the claustrophobic nightmare of the Staten Island projects into a gorgeous hymn about how a mother’s love conquers all. Ghost was still so heavy in the streets that he accidentally led the Delfonics into a shootout on a recording session gone awry. On the cover, Raekwon and Cappadonna receive co-billing, lending it the feel of an Only Built 4 Cuban Linx sequel more than a radical break from the Wu cosmology.

By Woodstock ‘99, critics and fans wondered if Wu-Tang were washed. Hindsight remembers it as a classic, but most reviews indicted the bloat and filler of 1997’s Wu-Tang Forever. A biblical flood ruined RZA’s studio, waterlogging hundreds of beats and hastening his baptism into Bobby Digital. Method Man and GZA’s follow-up albums disappointed everyone without a “W” tattooed on their clavicle, while Raekwon dropped the biggest No. 2 brick since Sam Bowie. The dollar bins of America were strangled with Shaq’s first record, Toad the Wet Sprocket, and innumerable Wu-Tang C-Listers sworn to omertà in exchange for a release date and two True Master beats.

Into the void Ghostface swaggered, inhaling breakbeats of hell, hitting mics like Ted Koppel, cham-punching Mase, and slapping crooked reverends so hard condoms, dice, and dope fell out of their pockets; sticking up rappers for their chains on New Year’s Eve in Cali and divulging no names; sprinkling snow inside the Optimo and sipping Remy Martin on diamonds. Supreme Clientele is Ironman. It’s invulnerable and silvery, the stream-of-consciousness hexes from a general who survived hell. A shade short of 30, Ghostface had been shot three times, survived multiple stints on Rikers Island, a debilitating battle with diabetes, and mourned the loss of two brothers with muscular dystrophy to become chromatic myth. He’d made religious pilgrimages to the motherland, slept on mud floors and hospital gurneys, prison cots, and silk sheets in $1,000-a-night hotel rooms. Now he was being tasked to save the Wu-Tang Clan.

To understand Supreme Clientele is to be humbled by epistemological limitations. You can see, feel, and taste it, but it can only be decrypted to a point. It’s a psychedelic record moored in reality. The ‘90s didn’t really end on 9/11; the ashes got incinerated with the smoke of RZA’s honey-dipped spliff.

Practically nothing is known about its recording process. In NYC, Starks demolished mics at the Hit Factory, Track, Quad Studios and the Wu’s own 36 Chambers compound in midtown. A Miami trip to Miami yielded “Ghosteini.” Out of a thousand beats, Ghost selected barely over a dozen. They mostly came from RZA, Mathematics, Inspectah Deck, Carlos “6 July” Broady of The Hitman, and Juju from The Beatnuts. All were logical picks if you’re trying to construct a great New York rap album circa 2000.

Out of a sped-up Solomon Burke loop came “Apollo Kids,” courtesy of Hassan of the UMCs, Staten Island’s first major rap crew. His discogs page shows nothing after Supreme Clientele. A semi-anonymous producer named Carlos Bess furnished his biggest hit “Cherchez La Ghost,” a cocaine opera about Tommy Mottola getting dumped, where U-God brags about busting through condoms and drinking mediocre lime rum. These are the things you can’t account for.

Consider that the beat for “Nutmeg” came from Ghost’s barber, Arthur, who cut hair on Staten Island. Somehow, the only major production credit of Black Moes-Art’s career is one of the hardest beats in history, a clean fade sliced from a forgotten 12” originally cut by Eddie Holman, the falsetto behind “(Hey There) Lonely Girl.” It sounds like he made it for a Saturday morning cartoon about the overcrowded projects of Alpha Centauri where everyone’s hands are semi-automatics; the only currency is angel dust, and the high priest cuts hair in a plutonium suit.

The common denominator was the RZA. He assembled and mixed them, adding uniform layers of grime and radioactivity, bizarre alarms and a dense twisted paranoia. It’s soul music transmogrified into gleaming metal, a tank covered in diamonds. The instrumentals sound like they’re ranting right back at Ghost, who sounds like he’s dripping blood onto the mic stand. As Chris Rock said about those cadaverous scratches on “Stroke of Death,” it makes you want to stab your babysitter.

Supreme Clientele established the template for what Kanye did later on Yeezus. Assemble an arsenal of heat and desecrate it to your personal satisfaction. It’s no coincidence. In Kanye West in the Studio, West claims, “I feel like I got my whole style from Ghostface…my whole mentality about hip-hop.” He later explains that many of the soul-chops that wound up on The Blueprint were originally intended for Ghostface until Jay Z heard them.

A few years ago, Mathematics laid out how it all happened. The RZA protégé never really topped “Mighty Healthy,” the original first single that Kanye lifted for “New God Flow.” It evokes a rare twinkling evil, like some velvet afterlife where you are condemned to sip Ginger Ale and watch Kung Fu movies for eternity. “That whole time period, [Ghostface] had a glow about him,” Mathematics said to HipHopDX. “That was how that whole Supreme Clientele came about. It was because of that glow.”

Maybe that’s the most appropriate metaphor for this album. Ghost had the sort of nuclear phosphorescence that people use to explain what they can’t explain. He rapped like he was a sacred vessel for ancient spirits with a preternatural ardor for Teddy Pendergrass. Ghost says it himself, these are “graveyard spells.” Fog your goggles.

Crushed Out Heavenly

On Supreme Clientele, Ghostface does nothing short of revolutionize the English language. Words like tidal waves drown you as you gulp for air, just trying to tread water and interpret what was said four bars ago. Ears twitch, you catch the aroma of Kansas fried chicken as it whips past, the grievous ululations of mothers mourning their dead sons. It’s like a Weegee photograph of the late Giuliani era, but simultaneously a proto-Adult Swim hallucination where Apollo Kids lounge on gilded thrones, sipping wine coolers in King Tut hats.

“The knowledge is how it sounds,” he said to The Source. “See we funny niggas. I’m a give you a little jewel. A lot of funny niggas know how to rap. The slang that we be saying G, it could mean whatever at that time. We say everything. ‘Lobsterhead.’ Come on man. If a nigga fit that type of category, then he a lobsterhead. It’s just that—slang. It’s real, but it’s what it means at that time.”

If hip-hop’s original rule was the Wild Style, Supreme Clientele shatters every precept while still respecting the foundation. There are scratches, breakbeats, and the (mostly) good-natured insanity to be the greatest. It’s the wildest style, rap stretched to silly putty lengths, as far as you can go without falling off the edge of the needle. There’s the DNA of Rakim, Big Daddy Kane, Biz Markie, Rammellzee, Slick Rick, Ultramagnetic MCs and Kool Keith, but this marked a seismic rupture with tradition. It was art-rap made for the asphalt—the closest that hip-hop ever came to Ulysses, and not only because Joyce described the “snotgreen sea” and Ghost conjured a “booger-green Pacer.” Both Joyce and Ghost understand that basic idea that a “man of genius makes no mistakes. His errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery.”

At times, Supreme Clientele accidentally channels Raymond Chandler translating A Season in Hell. At others, the dirty nasal bark summons Donald Goines on DMT or Lewis Carroll in the slithy toves of Stapleton, where the ambulance don’t come. Ghost intuitively realized what André Breton claimed was the definition of surrealism: the chance meeting on a dissecting table of a sewing machine and an umbrella. How else to categorize the man who arranged the combination of words, “Dicking down Oprah, jump rope/David Dinkins/Watch the black mayor of D.C. hit the mocha.”

You could spend all day deciphering “Malcolm,” with its snippet of Malcolm X condemning the “corrupt, vicious, and hypocritical system that has castrated the black man.” The description of an anonymous phantom as the one “that cut his wrists, talkin’ bout the cuffs did it/He bantamweight, frontin’ majorly/Eyes like Sammy Davis Jr.” He divines the phrase, “Dream merchant tucked in the cloud,” fingers Pamela Lee, and dares someone to make him “catch a Kennedy.” One skit chronicles the travails of a crackhead named after a World War I President. Another mercilessly threatens 50 Cent. For whatever reason, he finishes “Stroke of Death” by bellowing, “White man scream, SWIM STARKS SHARKS!”

Lef off the album was a twisted soul death ballad alternately called “In the Rain,” “Wise,” or “In the Rain (Wise).” Ghost claimed that he wrote it stoned on the beach in Florida during a torrential downpour upon learning that one of his best friends had been murdered. The more he wrote, the more the storm thrashed until it ceased four or five hours later; then he stood up with tears in his eyes, noticed a pyramid in the sand, walked around it three times, uttered an “All praises due Allah” incantation, and returned home. He apparently laid it down in Detroit with The Dramatics, the Detroit Orchestra, and Motown guitarist Dennis Coffey. I only know this from the liner notes of the album that I purchased in 2000. The actual song was not on my CD. The tracklist is completely wrong too. In this parallel universe, it makes perfect sense.

Through this warped and sinistral way, Supreme Clientele is about love. Ironman unmasked a scorned Lothario simultaneously trying to establish himself as an elite rapper like Raekwon, Method Man, Ol’ Dirty Bastard, and GZA. It’s a competitive record with something to prove. But here Ghost sounds like he just fucking loves rapping. And he loves children in Africa. And he loves ’70s and ’80s New York. And he loves 2Pac and Biggie and Malcolm and Marvin Gaye and anyone who stood for something. He loves mink coats, cognac, baked ziti, and Allah. He’s extraordinarily pro-black, not because he’s anti-anyone else, but because he profoundly loves his people for their soul, strength, and common heritage.

He loves his crew, who roll deep alongside him: from Trife on the outro of "One" to Superb popping up everywhere, to the posse cuts "We Made It", "Buck 50" and "Wu Banga 101.” It’s Ghost’s show, but the experience of recording it doesn’t sound solitary. He loves them so deeply because he’s acutely aware of how quickly this mirage can vanish. On “We Made It,” Starks celebrates another victory by just a thin thread of electric current. Before 2000 ends, one of its guest rappers, Chip Banks became a chalk outline memory in Harlem, murdered over a small cash dispute, barely 30 years old. Eight children left behind. It’s one more reminder that this was his life’s work—not merely something great made in a crazy period, but the only way that period could have ended.

There’s an old Ghostface quote where he simplifies rap to the most basic prerequisite: get “some official beats and say fly shit over them.” Even if that was all that he did on Supreme Clientele, it would still be a classic. But what makes it transformational are those minor details. The almost tossed-off aside where the vivid laser eye guy spits, “West Brighton pool now I’m into iron duels.” It’s a name-check of the neighborhood spot where he used to swim, a sad glint of far-off nostalgia as he considers who might be lurking the next time he steps outside.

This is the duality that remains constant, the fluid superhero transformation as Starks shifts from retina-searing brightness to black and white grit, comic absurdity to adolescent remembrance, revelations spoken through rap. It’s the testament of a mortal god, hoping to save the world, hoping to free himself.

#reviews-albums

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