#HSJAHSJSJD BUT ALSO LIKE CAN I BE HONEST

[starheirxero]

I've just watched Lunar's nightmare, and I don't even know, where to begin!

First of all, there is the "You're a disappointment" line from Castor. I really, really hope, this was just Lunar's imagination, because I will cry otherwise-

The dream itself though? Terrifying. There's something so unsettling about the warm atmosphere as Lunar is chased by their nightmares. It gives off a false sense of security. The lights are warm and comforting, the place is cozy. They went there for safety, and yet, they ended up found, and chased in a scene that could be out of a horror movie, only to end up dead.

Then there are the things they saw, the people they encountered. The very personification of their fears and insecurities.

Earth and Monty's scene in particular made my heart sink. They are so afraid, that Earth is still scared of them. To make matters worse, Monty seemed just as terrified, and this hits honestly horribly. They were the first to reach out, to treat them with kindness. They were always a protective barrier, and an emotional support. Hell, they were the one to witness their death, and brought them back! They were the one, who made Lunar doubt Eclipse, simply by treating them kinder than their own brother! Seeing them nervous and scared is…honestly? I'm not even sure how to describe it. The idea, that Lunar thinks Monty, strong, protective, fierce Monty could be afraid of them, when she really loves them so much is…painful, to say the least…

Then theres Gemini. Oh, dear, sweet Gemini… The way they mocked them, spoke out the words Lunar thought about themself… Pollux in particular made me nervous, she was pretty much chirping out her words, sounding delighted as she mocked him…its incredibly eerie.

And then there's Eclipse. Oh. My. God. Eclipse. Where does one even start with him? I think, this dream perfectly represents to us just how fucked up their relationship is.

Of course, he started out as the backup in Solar Flare's body, lurking outside the window. Just like last time. It's a direct callback to their trauma, same as when they avoided the room in which they was caught. It's the day of the hunt again, the day of Lunar's death.

What I find interesting though, is Eclise's role. Because Eclipse is the most prominent, of course he is, he is the cause of the trauma. But I find it interesting, that he talks in the same breath as Gemini. The two/three of them talk together, switching as they throw insults. It feels big. It makes sense as well, I don't think, Lunar cares as little about Eclipse as they'd like to admit. A deep rooted part of them, one they keep hidden away, seem to still care about what he has to say.

There's also the room in which they were caught. They go in, and immediately leave, only for Eclipse to chase them inside again. It feels as though it is saying, that Eclipse still has control, still has influence, though I could be wrong of course!

There's also the way he speaks to them, almost like talking to someone younger. Not a child, exactly, but someone who operates similarly. Given, that he designed them to be younger though, it makes sense. After all, how would Lunar be able to leave him, if they are young, and need to depend on their big brother still?

And then comes the first Eclipse, the original Eclipse. And man, this truly shows their old dynamic, the absolute terror it was, the way it made Lunar feel! Eclipse talks so casually, as though that's all they are, brothers. But then he locks the door, because Lunar could never escape from him, not from him. And then he starts yelling, making them feel bad for leaving, because of course, of course Lunar harbors guilt for it. After all, there were good moments there, moments that made them wonder, if they were really in the right. And of course Eclipse would guilt drip them, because that's what manipulators tend to do. One could also bring up Lunar's wish to understand Eclipse, their realization, that he's as fucked up as the rest of them. It may make them wonder, if they were in the wrong after all. Most tragically is, how they listen to him though, soaking in his words like the truth, and simply going with what he's saying, even answering him, thinking it's exactly what Eclipse wants to hear, just like they used to.

It's the haunting realization, that Lunar may never be free around Eclipse. If they are angry, they'll be controllable. But if they aren't, then they'll be afraid, and then they'll listen.

"I'm a monster" "A monster? Oh, you're worse than that. A failure." This line drives me insane, actually. There is just so much you can interpret into this single line.

On one hand, it could be "I may be a monster, but you are a failure, who can't do anything right."

But it could also be: "I am a monster. But you can't even be that much, you fail in doing even that." And this is what makes me insane. This is what drives me up the walls.

Just hear me out here: The meaning of what a "monster" is, can be incredibly subjective. However, there are two people that Lunar views as such.

Their first brothers, their original brothers. Bloodmoon is a literal monster in the sense of a bloodthirsty beast, craving only violence. Eclipse is a metaphorical monster. He is what Lunar fears most.

Lunar loved his brothers. He was so excited when he met Bloodmoon. He only ever wanted with Eclipse what Moon and Sun had. He wanted the three of them to be family.

But they are monsters, and he fails in being that. He could never be a part of them, no matter how much he'd wish for it, because he is not like them. He is a failure, for he can't even be a monster, feeling remorse and spiraling when he kills someone, even if it's someone, who hurt him deeply.

Last but not least is the conversation they held with themself. Interestingly enough, the other Lunar reminded me of the time, they were still stuck in Moon's head, and only had one official brother. Except they are bored, and are waiting for something to happen. How ironic, that this version of all mocks them, and tells them to grow up.

However, they managed to pull themself up, and that's all they can do for now. However, if dream Sun is to be believed? It's still just a mask again, they may be relapsing into old habits soon…

And then the Adhd took over, which is relatable-

HOLY SHIT, THIS IS SO DAMN LONG- I AM SO SORRY, MY MIND IS JUST IN OVERDRIVE RIGHT NOW, AND I WANTED TO SHARE MY THOUGHTS WITH YOU-

-Stardust

YEYSYSYEYYSYSYSYSHAHAHAHHHA!!!!!!!! YEEEEESSSSSSS YOU TORE THIS EPISODE APART DON'T APOLOGIZE I LOVE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't have many additional thoughts you are just so correct on ALL OF THIS. Episodes like this that give insight to a character's feelings and fears and thought processes are just EVERYTHING 2 ME. Especially with the fact that this dream had a theme of 1) being a failure and thus, a disappointment (Eclipse and Gemini) and 2) being a monster and thus, too scary to be around (Earth and Monty).

AND GHOD. ECLIPSE AS A WHOLE IN THE DREAM YEAH. I HONESTLY FELT MY HEART DROP WHEN HE SHOWED UP IN THE GLOWY SUN MODEL I FELT LIKE I JUST GOT BLASTED A MILLION YEARS INTO THE PAST. And yea omg the fact he locked the door scared me so bad. Especially with the fact that, like u said, he spoke so casually to Lunar as he came up the stairs. But literally behind closed doors it's an immediate barrage of insults!

AND GHOD. GHOOOOODDDDD BOTH THE WAYS TO INTERPRET ECLIPSE'S LINE TO LUNAR YEAH!!!!! "A MONSTER LIKE THE REST OF US" VS "TOO MUCH OF A FAILURE TO EVEN BE THAT." AUGH I'M GUNNA THINK ABOUT THAT FOREVER

AND WITH THEMSELVES,,, YEAH. YEAG. Seeing that version of Lunar come through the door IMMEDIATELY made me tear up I get so emotional for any variation of "same person talks to a version of themselves from a different point in time" and that HIT for me. Their words reminded me of when Lunar told Earth they don't like how they see themselves (before the Eclipse thing even happened), and I can only guess that old Lunar's words are an extension of that </3

AND THEN SUN AND THE DRAGON YEAHAGWJSGSKWGJCSM SUN'S WORDS WERE RLLY INTERESTING BUT THE DRAGON DISTRACTED ME SO BAD I DIDN'T EVEN PROCESS THEM THE FIRST TIME THROUGH. Sun voice stop lying to yourself stop masking so hard you don't even process your emotions stop feeling like you're exempt from the basic living experience of mistakes [dragon scampers by] what was that

#asks #anon #stardust anon #HSJAHSJSJD BUT ALSO LIKE CAN I BE HONEST #THAT EPISODE MADE MY HEART STOP A COUPLE TIMES TOO FOR REAL ABSJANDJ #not like a JUMPscare but I sharply inhaled!!!!! #the only time i actually jumped from a tsams episode was when sun bumped into lunara during the hide and seek game. fun fact HDJWBSJSJ #/ALSO./ #realizing I didn't comment on the earth n monty part but YEA THAT FUCKED ME UP BAD #especially with the 'i didnt think you were still hanging around this guy' #thinking that ppl r isolating themselves from u bc ur too terrible to be around now is like AUGH. HEARTBREAK 1 MILLION #exactly like u said too the fact that those 2 actually care abt lunar so much makes it so much more ueueueue #lunar and earth show #the lunar and earth show #tlaes #sams lunar #laes lunar #sams eclipse #long post