#I can withhold bias on near anything but not these and sun elves

[dnd-smash-pass-vs]

They're elves of the shadowfell, normal human height. They specialize in teleportation and invisibility, with the casters among them throwing in confusion and fear and illusion. Be careful though, as any trained in combat start making non-elves slower and worse while within 10 feet. From depression, from the sound of it. Their angst about being more ancient and timeless than you wordlessly attaches to you like a parasite, slowing you down. Good for if you enjoy concepts like-

Shadows, but like DARKER than shadow, that lash out when they're moody

looking beautiful unless in shadow, in which case they're corpselike

ignoring pointless things like "comfort" and "morals" and "rules"

being the chosen of the Raven Queen, and on her behalf collecting dark tragedy, sorrow, and feelings of loss.

being corpse pale with jet black hair, pure black eyes, and covered with tattoos/piercings/anything that would make a generic white suburban mom in the 50's scream in terror.

Lumping them all together because they're all the same outside one having mage hand and such. Idc what weapon they're holding.

#closest I'm getting to saying something nice about them. #i don't even care. #I can withhold bias on near anything but not these and sun elves #its fine. I make you suffer by pitting your favorites against each other. getting these into the next tournament is only fair. #you know that giant anti-shadarkai rant I went on a few months ago? #how I thought whoever did this to thier lore probably rewrites Warhammer stories to remove the satire and humor? #apparently he actually did write warhammer books holy shit I called it. #seriously though I love basically all monsters but these I looooooooooathe. #not even touching how annoyed I am that the shadar kai WERE ALREADY A THING #Like they weren't even elves #they just went “hey we'll bring them back as elves because 33 is a reasonable number of elf species” #yet not a green version of goblins there's already like 3 that'd be absurd. #like no make your OWN name for the special elves version 33 that hit on par with a demon lord while being cr 7 for some reason #shadar kai #looked into it #dnd #dnd5e #DnD 5e #d&d #smash or pass #5e #monsters of the multiverse #mpmm