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deadcactuswalking · 5 years

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 10th November 2019

I think I should give an update on what I’m listening to as I don’t often do that on this show. Hold on, let’s check my last.fm... oh, yeah, 300 scrobbles for Weezer – in the past week. I really have hit rock bottom.

Top 10

For what should be the sixth consecutive week now, “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I is at #1, and somehow that’s the only thing staying stable amongst all the chaos as while I’d like to think this was a relaxed week where it cleared out everything from the JESUS IS KING album bomb and left only the remnants of that busy week, it really wasn’t, and instead was a full-on avalanche by its own accord.

The first most obvious example of that is “Don’t Start Now” by Dua Lipa, debuting at #2, and that’s pretty much the only example of this week’s generally manic appearance in the top 10, as the huge comeback single becomes Dua Lipa’s 12th UK Top 40 hit and her seventh top 10 hit, her first top 10 since “Electricity” with Silk City peaked at #4 in 2018. I’ll be speaking more in depth about that song later.

Otherwise, we don’t have much interest in this first ten songs. “Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean (By technicality) is down one spot to number-three.

Unfortunately, this has opened up possibilities for Ed Sheeran and “South of the Border” featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B up a space to number-four.

Also down one space is “Circles” by Post Malone, surprisingly, at number-five, as I saw this as possibly making a run for #1 but that doesn’t seem as likely with the monster that “Dance Monkey” is.

“Lose You to Love Me” by Selena Gomez is down three spaces off of the debut to number-six, as I expected.

Staying steady at number-seven is “Good as Hell” by Lizzo featuring Ariana Grande.

Also still at number-eight is “Memories” by Maroon 5.

Now we have two one-space fallers at the tail-end of the top 10, first of all “Bruises” by Lewis Capaldi at number-nine. I don’t even know how this is still here.

Secondly, and finally to round off the top 10, “Outnumbered” by Dermot Kennedy at #10.

Climbers

There aren’t many climbers here at all but the only two notable climbers are in the top 20 and look like foreshadowing of hits to come, so that’s notable in itself, although very unfortunate as despite me being relatively ambivalent on the pretty decent “This is Real” by Jax Jones featuring Ella Henderson moving up 11 spaces to #19, I am immensely displeased about “hot girl bummer” by blackbear peaking higher than the original “Hot Girl Summer” as it reaches the top 20 at #18 after a seven-space boost, as if this hack needed any more attention put on him.

Edit: I forgot about Niall Horan’s “Nice to Meet Ya” up eight spots to #26 this week, which I’m happy about since it’s a great song and I’d love to see it find its way into the top 10.

Fallers

There aren’t actually as many fallers this week, or at least less than I expected, but there’s still a couple notable fallers to talk about here, such as “Follow God” by Kanye West down nine spaces to #15 off of the debut at #6 last week, as well as other losses for most of the debuts from last week (Well, those that are still on the chart), those being “Floss” by AJ Tracey featuring MoStack and Not3s down five to #27, “Orphans” by Coldplay down five to #32 and “Look at Her Now” by Selena Gomez down 13 to #39. Also losing out on five spaces this week at #33 is “Take Me Back to London”, a former #1, by Ed Sheeran and Stormzy, and remixed by Sir Spyro featuring Aitch and Jaykae.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

We actually do have a re-entry this week and it’s “Graveyard” by Halsey back at #40, meaning we have eight drop-outs, most of those being established smash hits finishing up their run, those being “Sorry” by Joel Corry featuring uncredited vocals from Hayley May from #32, “Ladbroke Grove” by AJ Tracey out from #35, “Senorita” by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello out from #36, “Taste (Make it Shake)” by Aitch from #37, “3 Nights” by Dominic Fike from #38 and “Don’t Call Me Angel (Charlie’s Angels)” by Ariana Grande featuring Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Rey from #39, as well as, of course, Kanye West’s two hits from JESUS IS KING that debuted last week, “Selah” featuring uncredited vocals from Sunday Service, Ant Clemons and Bongo ByTheWay out from #19 and “Closed on Sunday” with A$AP Bari out from #20.

ALBUM BOMB: Krept & Konan – Revenge is Sweet

On the 1st of November this year, British trap duo Krept & Konan released their sophomore album Revenge is Sweet and it peaked at #5 on the albums chart. I haven’t listened to it because I personally don’t care much for the two rappers, but they are big enough to land two hits in the top 40, one of which was released as a single prior to the album but both bearing high-profile features, so I’ll have to talk about them.

#28 – “G Love” – Krept & Konan featuring Wizkid

Produced by P2J

First of all, I obviously do not have as much to say about Krept & Konan than I do about Kanye, so this will be a shorter episode in comparison to last week with JESUS IS KING since there’s a lot less to unpack and I have a lot less passionate opinions about the duo (Which, considering how disappointed I was with that album, is probably not a bad thing). This is pre-release single, “G Love”, Krept & Konan’s fourth UK Top 40 hit, and it features Nigerian singer Wizkid, who makes his second ever appearance on the chart. For what it’s worth, I actually very much enjoy Wizkid whenever he appears, usually bubbling under the top 40 with songs featuring Drake and Skepta, as he has a lot of charisma; honestly, I’m surprised this is his only his second appearance on the chart, and his first since “One Dance”, a Drake song featuring him and Kyla hit a record peak of #1 in 2016. It’s a pretty odd collaboration for Krept & Konan, but then again, Wizkid did a song with Skepta as well, so this could be good – and is it? Well, it isn’t a good first impression when the otherwise nice synths are clipping pretty badly but it doesn’t exactly create a bad vibe or atmosphere, and while Konan sounds half-dead on the hook, Wizkid’s high-pitched Auto-Tuned croon is pretty vibrant. Konan is equally dull on the verse, although admittedly both he and Krept have pretty funny opening lines, even if Krept is mostly talking about emojis for half of his verse (Not even kidding, apparently if you cross him, you’ll get emoji knives). I don’t really have an opinion about this song, to be honest, it’s a pretty generic Afroswing beat with some squeaky vocal samples, and Krept and Konan both sound like they did a one-take whilst high and left. There’s a weird empty space between the verses and chorus as well, it genuinely feels a bit janky at times (God, I haven’t used that word in ages). Wizkid doesn’t even have a verse, so this is pretty boring. Let’s hope the next song can redeem the duo...

#23 – “Tell Me” – Krept & Konan featuring D-Block Europe and Ling Hussle

Produced by Dabeatfreakz

Okay, so this is more in Krept & Konan’s wheelhouse and has honestly got me pretty excited because D-Block Europe are the funniest men in UK trap right now, and I don’t think they even realise it. Anyway, this is Krept & Konan’s fifth UK Top 40 hit, D-Block Europe’s sixth, and it’s actually also a pre-release single (Hell, this one’s got a video). If you’re wondering who Ling Hussle is, well, she’s actually an upcoming rapper and singer who hangs around these guys, seemingly, and hasn’t actually been able to crack a million views yet from what I can gather, so this really is kind of her breakout single and obviously her first to hit the UK Top 40. Can these five rappers make a cohesive posse cut? Well, of course not, it’s D-Block Europe, but they try, bless them. First of all, this really isn’t a Krept & Konan song, Konan is definitely there even if he’s drowned in Auto-Tune that makes him unrecognisable, but Krept has a really short verse, and Ling Hussle straight-up doesn’t, instead providing an admittedly pretty sultry hook with Young Adz, who somehow cannot handle the simple melody that Ling Hussle lays down and kills, having a stroke on the pretty bland piano-trap beat as he tends to do. Krept is also pretty pathetic here, with a hilarious falsetto that genuinely made me chuckle – although that was probably unintentional. The end of Krept’s janky verse is hilarious, with the beat just barely there, and it mostly being breathing sounds and one-syllable ad-libs while Krept barely gets words out, and it’s all drowned in Auto-Tune with so much weird empty space. It’s so bizarre, to the point where Young Adz’s obnoxious singing about wanting the woman to open her legs so he can “watch her pee” sounds pretty for-the-course. Genius annotators just gave up on Konan’s verse, and he and Dirtbike LB are easily the least interesting here, although Konan does spend much of his time making some strange, misguided metaphor for guns using Maggie Simpson. He probably has the best verse here, as it’s the only one that doesn’t completely collapse midway through. I can’t help but like this, though, because everything goes wrong at some point and no-one even attempts to fix it, much like all of D-Block Europe, who I’m starting to think are my favourite UK rap artists because they are so unashamedly awful that whilst most of their music is unlistenable, any deeper analysis forms a new genre I like to call Post-Cubist era trap-rap.

NEW ARRIVALS

#37 – “Opp Thot” – Poundz

Produced by HARGO

“I could never wife your opp-thot. Give me that neck, come bop-bop. I just want to jeet and skeet, don’t use no teeth, girl, give me that slop-top.” How poetic. It’s a viral song from Poundz, and hence his first UK Top 40 hit, and I have such little expectations that this could be Nostalgia Critic’s version of The Wall and I’d praise it to hell and back as if it were by Floyd. Seriously though, this isn’t actually that bad. Lyrical density isn’t there but I didn’t expect it to be, and the mixing on the version that is used for Spotify adverts might actually be better as the hi-hat is too centred with Poundz’s multi-tracked and kind of hurts my ears actually. There are actually some cool lines here, and punchlines that make me understand the viral success, like when he kicks someone “out like Brexit”, the loveable way in how he says he’ll shoot you (“Man get hit with the ostrich bird”), how he makes people run away from him “like Scooby”, and a couple of other funny pop culture references about Tetris, Snapchat and... getting your enemy sprayed like Fireman Sam. Yeah, that line won me over, because the beat is just a menacing piano line with some skittering trap beat behind it and honestly nothing all too special. It isn’t that bad though, there is some talent here.

#35 – “Break Up (Bye Bye)” – Cast of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK

Produced by Leland and Frederick William Scott

Features uncredited vocals from Jade Thirlwall

...Huh? Okay, so I knew of the new British edition of RuPaul’s Drag Race (Graham Norton’s a legend) but I actually have no idea how the “drag race” works. I know what drag queens are and do (If “drag queens” is the right term), but I don’t know the format of the show at all – although I know the American edition has probably been around for decades at this point. The people on the American show do release promo singles but they don’t ever get close to charting anywhere so I usually don’t have to worry about any of this, but I am a complete outsider to whatever fanbase this has, and that seems to be a sizeable portion of people since this did chart. So, I did some vague research and found out that this was written by MNEK, who you should know from “Never Forget You” and several other hit singles, for the fifth episode of the show, and is credited under the name “Frock Destroyers”. Classy. Listen, this is the cast’s first UK Top 40 hit, and I do not understand the show, I’m just going to make this clear because I won’t understand the song either (In fact, there are two songs and they have the same name but one of them is by “Filth Harmony” so I’m even more confused). Anyway, about the song: the horns sound really cheap and gross, as do the hi-hats and the awfully-mixed instrumentation in general, so much so that I’m actually distracted by the very questionable lyrics, mostly because of the awful bass mastering that isn’t only clipping but it just doesn’t have any impact in the drop. It’s not like the chorus is anthemic as it’s supposed to be either, because it just feels so rushed and random. The female lead vocal is delivered by Jade Thirlwall of Little Mix so it’s not like it isn’t a good performance, but it is so inconsistently mixed in comparison to what I’m assuming are the drag contestants, who are so much louder than everything, especially the second verse. It’s pretty catchy, admittedly, but this really is a bit of a trainwreck production-wise. I guess I’ve officially been frock-destroyed. Whatever that means.

Edit: I listened to the other version and it might actually be worse lol

#31 – “Kiss and Tell” – AJ Tracey and Skepta

Produced by Skepta

More UK trap? Okay, well, it was actually a pretty big week for the genre as AJ Tracey and Skepta are also here with their eighth and 15th UK Top 40 hit respectively, “Kiss and Tell”. AJ Tracey had a song debut last week which was okay and I’m generally indifferent towards the guy although his debut album was pretty lacklustre, and I’ve always been a Skepta fan, so in a way I’m excited to hear but I am worried that it could be pretty dull as well, considering AJ Tracey’s got top billing... but it is Skepta-produced and I haven’t heard many bad beats from the man, and this one is definitely very cute, with the twinkling synth melody and otherwise typical trap beat and 808s, as well as a haunting vocal loop. Honestly, everyone kills it here. Sure, “kiss and tell” doesn’t rhyme with “Astroworld”, but AJ Tracey’s flow in the first verse is insane, with some really great lines, especially the hilarious closing line about... something falling off a chair, let’s just say that. Seriously, this is probably AJ Tracey’s best ever verse, it’s rapid and slick, and works especially with his voice. Skepta also delivers a slightly slower verse here, but his flow is janky at times, and takes awkward pauses despite moments where he really kills it – in fact this verse parallels most of his discography. Skepta can be awkward and inconsistent but when he really kills it, I’m amazed, and he does impress me with his flow here sometimes, but AJ really shines on this song. I didn’t have much to say about that one, but it’s actually pretty great. I hope this isn’t a fluke, because if this is how AJ is coming in on his second album, it could be one of my favourite hip-hop albums of next year. We’ll see, but for now this is great.

#30 – “Thumb” – M Huncho and Nafe Smallz

Produced by Quincy

While these names may seem alien to you, they’ve actually charted before. Nafe Smallz and M Huncho both appeared with Gunna on the Plug’s “Broken Homes”, a song I wish I enjoyed more than I did, and Nafe also appeared on a pretty awful Skepta single called “Greaze Mode” (Probably a candidate for, if not, his worst song), so this is their second and third UK Top 40 hit respectively. The BBC refused to give it any cover art on their page, so I guess that could mean anything... but it most likely means that this is garbage, because this really is some awful, unforgivable dreck. First of all, let’s talk about the lyrics and structure for a bit. There are two renditions of the chorus, they’re both exactly the same, over-long two-part hooks delivered by M Huncho. There is one verse in the middle and it is entirely a trade-off between the two rappers, with Nafe Smallz being considerably more sexist and disgusting in his verse where he delivers a frankly terrible Young Thug impression. I understand that rap music has a lot of misogyny and disrespect towards women, hell, I have to acknowledge that as someone who just praised a song called “Opp Thot”, but at least have some attempt in hiding your lack of respect or sympathy for women, or being somewhat respectful in how you say everything, or at least funny in how over-the-top you’re being, perhaps. What Nafe Smallz says about the “slut” and “thot” that he doesn’t actually make effort to have sex with and just watches whilst smoking is frankly really revolting and upsetting, especially because it got into the UK Top 40 which really should say something about us as a music-listening public, that we let this get so high. Nafe Smallz’s meek, high-pitched, nasal voice is aggravating, so much so that M Huncho’s unintelligible murmuring in the intro might actually sound better. The beat has some infuriating bass mastering as most cheap UK rap does, and overall it sounds pretty type beat. M Huncho doesn’t necessarily sound bad here, but his Auto-Tuned flow does very little to change and makes the three-minute runtime feel exhausting. Admittedly, some of Nafe Smallz’s inflections sound pretty, and M Huncho’s stammering is lazy, evening the awfulness out between the two rappers out pretty well. Also, was there really any need for the whole theme of the song being about putting thumbs in... female posteriors? The outro is literally just “put my thumb up in her butt” repeated on loop. Yeah, no, I don’t like this. Next.

#2 – “Don’t Start Now” – Dua Lipa

Produced by Ian Kirkpatrick – Peaked at #30 in the US

This is the massive debut this week from pop singer Dua Lipa, one of my favourites voices in pop music right now actually, and someone who has grown on me immensely in the past year, although some of the songwriting still isn’t as strong as it should be and she still has a tendency to slip into the background of her own production. I’m hoping for that to change with her sophomore album, and this is (Probably – “Swan Song” still exists) the lead single off of that record. The cover art is going for a vaguely late-90s early 2000s look, and I’ve heard this is a more straight-forward dance-pop tune, so I’m hyped to listen to this... and yeah, as I expected, this is pretty great. Initially, I wasn’t actually impressed with the flavourless piano intro, but as soon as it kicked into full gear I knew the hype around this was worth it, because that bassline is INCREDIBLE. As someone who has recently found a lot of love for house music, this bassline is one of the best I’ve heard from the genre, and this is very much house, almost like French house to some extent, but also very nu-disco, meaning the cover art is very fitting for the era that both it and the song are attempting to replicate. Dua Lipa sounds great as she always does, going into her higher register with rhythmic, multi-tracked, almost-rapping cadences in the verse, but taking a sudden shift to a sweet diva vocal in the pre-chorus, which is beautiful, as the pianos sound good on their own, but the squealing synth comes in at the perfect time along with the hi-hats, the song is just so intricately structured... then we get the drop, which is just great, as well go back to the minimalist house beat where Dua Lipa aggressively tells off this ex who has just started putting any effort into the relationship after it ended, with sassy inflections and... random sound effects, which I’m not complaining about. The slick, disco guitar and groove in the second verse accentuates Dua’s lyrics detailing how he tried to break up with her, almost implying a manipulative or toxic relationship. The second drop is somehow more impressive than the first, with a stuttering “Don’t” hinting at the drop prior and some sampled cheering that, much like the cowbell, is a random sound effect, but adds more punch to the chorus. Once the post-chorus hit, I had to take a break from writing and genuinely calm down, I was really overwhelmed with everything happening, yet it doesn’t feel cluttered because everything comes in at the right time, sometimes when you don’t even expect it to, and the mixing is great, far from over-produced even as while it’s pure pop with a lot of manufacturing, it feels a lot more organic especially with the post-chorus, which is just gorgeous. I don’t want to even spoil it for you or myself anymore, so I think I’ll actually leave it at that. My commentary will just cheapen how brilliant this song’s climax, is, really. This is an amazing record and one of, if not my favourite song from Dua Lipa. I hope this has as much success in the US because if this doesn’t get on one of my year-end best lists for 2019 or 2020, I will be severely disappointed.

Conclusion

Well, it should be obvious, right? The Best and Worst of the Week go out pretty easily, Dua Lipa getting the Best of the Week for “Don’t Start Now”, and M Huncho and Nafe Smallz getting Worst of the Week for “Thumb” which is just gross. Honourable Mention is obviously going to AJ Tracey and Skepta for “Kiss and Tell” although Dishonourable Mention is a bit harder. I think I can’t go with the Drag Race because that would be unfair – it’s a bad song, sure, but if I understood the show more, maybe I’d see the appeal. I don’t want to step on too many toes, either. “G Love” is unremarkable, as is “Opp Thot”, so I’ll probably go with “Tell Me” by Krept & Konan featuring D-Block Europe and Ling Hussle. I hope you enjoyed reading, I’m off to listen to Pinkerton again probably, and I’ll see you next week, hopefully it’s not as busy.

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helenhuntingdon · 7 years

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Adam Barlow & Daniel Osbourne Episode Guide

~And potentially for the Barlows I’m starting with just how to catch up with them from their return in November 2016 (so, work n progress?), particularly with Adam, because he’s trash bae, and Daniel bc he’s also a fave + for Rob Mallard fans.

As with Kate & Rana episodes, all recent episodes should be available to download on UK Soap Share (if you need them or if eps are not online to watch!) so I’m posting a guide of where you can only watch these episodes and/or scenes, the dates of episodes and the most important moments of the storylines/for the characters. If there’s anything specific you want to find, if I haven’t posted it, please ask me and I’ll try to add me, and also feel free to contact me if there’s something else or if there’s dead links. :)

Barlow Boys are back in town~ Daniel’s Best Moments Adam’s Best Moments

2016: Adam & Daniel return: 16th November: (1 - Daniel first scene @ 2:41) (2 Adam @ 2:00) (3) (4) (or: Adam first scene & Daniel first scene & second ish w/ fam~ tho disclaimer Daniel wasn’t actually a ‘secret son’ lmao, they knew about him he just hadn’t been seen for years.) Aftermath of return and Ken’s stroke for the next eps~ 17th November (1) (2) (3) (4) (Fam dinner) 18th November Part 1 18th November Part 2 (1) (rest not online to watch sorry) (missing - some guy is suspicious around the house) 21st November Part 1 21st November Part 2 (8 mins in Peter RLLY awk’ly asks Daniel if he likes fellas) 23rd November (1) Daniel not getting along with Tracy, & others at the Rover’s 24th November. Daniel aftermath, w/ scenes w/ Peter while Tracy snoops at his flat, plus Adam and Simon scenes and Adam’s car is ~stolen. 25th November Part 1 + 2 if you go throughthe vidss~ Daniel is blamed for Adam’s stolen car, who admits his mother left him. (Lots of good Barlows scenes w/ Adam being a shit in these eps) Adam’s car is still stolen. ... Ahem. 28th November Daniel and Ken bonding, Adam flirts with Eva.

5th December Part 1 (1) (2) (3) Adam’s now into Maria, Tracy warns him off, Daniel’s getting kicked out his flat, has scenes w/ Ken & Peter about his mum. 5th December Part 2 (1) (2) (3) (Adam and Maria, oh yay~) 7th December (1) (2) (3) Aftermath of Daniel’s revelation + Adam & Maria um sexing. 8th December (1) Tracy & Adam scene at the end. (3) Adam & Maria. 9th December Part 1 (1) (2) (3)- Daniel and Peter scenes. Also some Tracy and Mary, and Daniel and Billy interact awkwardly. 16th December Part 1 (1) (2) (3) Adam and Maria awkwardness + Adam and Sarah scene <3 19th December Part 1 (2) (3) Adam gets hella dragged by Audrey. Adam/Maria awks... continues. Part 2 (2) (3) 21st December (1) (2) (3) Highlight: Adam talks shit, gets hit. End of the OTP to end all OTP’s that was Adam/Maria. 23rd December (1) (2) (3) Basically Barlow Christmassy scenes~ while Adam works a black eye. 24th December (1) (2) (3) 25th December Everyone watches Peter and Nick’s hilarious fight~ 26th December Part 1 (1) Ken and Daniel discuss Peter. Part 2 (1) Bit of Daniel w/ Ken, Simon, Peter.

Bonus~ Samuel and Rob being cute and Christmassy!!!

2017 2nd January (1) (2) Adam takes an interest in the factory again... AND IS 6 FOOT!!!!! (background info for this sl: Adam inherited the factory when his dad Mike Baldwin died - but his half brother and Leanne kept the will from him, until Leanne gave Adam the will. Adam settled for 40% of the factory, but he sold it to the Connors when he left last time, but still has a connection to the factory bc of his dad.) 4th Jan (1) (2) Daniel’s birthday. Adam’s plotting continues, as he calls the police n Aidan. 9th Jan Part 2 (1) (2) Adam’s cocky, and Daniel has a thing for angry, ketchup-wielding, Peter & Adam cash. Daniel crushes on Sinead. (Warning for full ep: Michelle loses the baby & it’s the worst thing ever.) 13th Jan Part 2 AD (And there is Michelle aftermath.) 16th Jan Part 1 (1) Adam makes fun of Daniel working on his MA application. 18th Jan (1) (2) (3) Daniel and Sinead. 23rd Jan Part 1 (1) (2) Adam’s unhappy over the factory and Ken spending more time w/ Daniel + teases Luke and Tracy (;_;) - Ken considers a DNR order. 25th Jan Adam (1) (2) (3) Aidan vs Adam continues. Adam and Alya team up. (TW death for Michelle & the funeral) 27th Jan Part 1 (1) (2) (3) Tracy bae’s birthday. <3 Adam and Alya plot. And the end of Adam’s masterplan~ (there’s also gr9 Tracy/Luke in these eps ;_;) Part 2 (1) Adam and Alya scene~ Daniel makes fun of Adam for once~ & Ken lectures him. (2) A nice scene between Adam & Daniel at the flat. (3) Adam apologies to Ken. 30th Jan Part 1 (1) Tracy tells the Barlows they’re official. (2) Adam helps Ken with his will. Don’t mention the paperweight rip. Part 2 (1) (2) (3) Todd and Adam become saltmates 5eva <333

1st February (1) (2) (3) The Barlows meet over Ken’s will. 3rd Feb Part 2 (1) Daniel and Sinead go for a drink. 6th Feb Part 1 (1) Adam and Ken react to Peter and Toyah’s relationship. (Rosie and Sophie also return in this ep! :o) (3) Daniel judges Adam’s study style & flirts w/ Sinead some more... Part 2 (1) (2) (3) Daniel and Sinead flirting late at the factory. 8th Feb (1) (2) (3) Adam cheats, after some classy making fun of Daniel’s virginity - which doesn’t last long. (dry heaving) 10th Feb Part 1 (1)(2)(3) Daniel tells Ken Adam cheated (resulting in what is basically a public Todd/Adam break up </3) - Adam retaliates by telling Chesney that Daniel slept with Sinead. Part 2 (1)(2)(3) Adam and Tracy find Luke stuck under a car engine. Daniel and Sinead aftermath (Sinead drags Adam, Daniel gets angry at Chesney.) Sinead/Daniel is go, Adam drinks with Rosie. 13th Feb Part 1 (1)(2)(3) Adam wakes up with Rosie, and makes fun of Daniel/Sinead (+runs into Todd), who are still dealing with repercussions. Rosie tells Adam about the drugs. Part 2 (1)(2)(3) Adam digs for (and finds) the drugs~ Ken walks in on Sinead in a towel at Daniel’s flat after he misses an important meeting. 15th Feb (1)(2)(3) Adam discusses selling the drugs to open a business with Todd. Rosie and Sophie discover he’s stolen the drugs. Kevin is not happy. Adam blackmails them. Awk Sinead/Daniel fam dinner with Ken. 16th Feb (1)(2)(3) Todd and Adam go see a house~ But Todd discovers where the drugs are from. 17th Feb Part 1 (1)(2) Adam goes for an interview. Part 2 (1) & for a drink w/ Trina. They go back to the flat and Adam and Daniel chat proverbial phrases. 27th February Part 1 Daniel and Sinead have a romantic meal.

1st March Sinead/Daniel drama continues, w/ everyone disapproving. 3rd March Part 1 & 2 Sinead is late and Adam helps at the florist. -Sinead is preggers and Adam borrows the car to see drug dealer Ronan Truman’s pace. 6th March Part 1 - Daniel & Sinead discuss the pregnancy, before Daniel talks to Rana about it. Todd sees through Adam (as do Rosie and Kevin), Adam charms Mary for his own ends & goes see Ronan Truman while Ken’s frustrations with him grow. Part 2 - Daniel makes a decision about the pregnancy, Adam has to decide between selling the drugs or doing the right thing and staying with Amy. A lot of these scenes are on Corrie’s YT channel~ (1)(2)(3)(4-cw abuse) 8th March Daniel and Sinead have money concerns. Amy tells Ken to be nicer to Adam. Daniel has an interview with Robert. Ronan Truman is sneaky at the pub and threatens to hurt Tracy and Amy if Adam doesn’t give him back his money - which Ken has helpfully stolen, and burns. ;_; #endsoapmoneyburning2k17 10th March Part 1 - Adam continues to suffer the consequences. (There’s also a cute Adam and Sarah scene~) It’s also Sinead’s birthday. YT vids of most of the Adam scenes- (1)(2)(3)(4-cw violence) Part 2 CW violence. Ken and Adam hospital scenes (backstory alert) (CW discussion of addiction) - (1)(2)(3)(4)(5) (elsewhere, tumblr.com user helenhuntingdon’s adam barlow obsession officially begins~) 13th March Part 1 Ken tells Daniel Adam’s returned to Canada... 17th March Part 1 Daniel and Sinead consider moving (after a random woman stops by to tell Adam to drop dead.) Daniel gets a letter. Part 2 Daniel weighs up his options. 20th March Part 1 Daniel and Sinead flat hunt while Daniel tries to hide his Oxford offer. Part 2 Ken fucks up Daniel’s plans and is a misogynist bastard to Sinead (and about Deirdre! oh god end his life already) 24th March Part 1 Amy is secretly plotting with Adam. Ken stirs some more in everyone’s lives. Part 2 Sinead has an abortion. 27th March Part 1 Daniel is devastated. Part 2 Daniel is even more devastated. Everyone searches for Amy, while Adam is sneaky, and Ken faces the consequences~ (CW violence?) 29th March Aftermath with all the Barlows in the hospital. Adam returns well quick from ‘Canada’~ 31st March Part 1 The Barlows are questioned. Part 2 Who start to turn on each other~

3rd April Part 1 Ken is conscious but doesn’t remember what happened & suspicious of his family. Adam gets an alibi from Rosie. Part 2 The police talk to Ken and then Adam again. 5th April Lots of Barlows being suspicious of each other (for a while tbf) espesh when Daniel is questioned again. 7th April Part 1 Suspicious suspicious Part 2 suspicious 17th April Part 1 Adam ~investigates Daniel & tries to get Ken to believe it wasn’t him. Part 2 19th April Adam and Mary scene ;_; and Amy~ Tracy and Luke break up :((( Peter, Daniel and Adam are suspicious of Tracy. 21st April Part 1 Adam gets arrested. Part 2 24th April Part 1 Adam is still being questioned. Part 2 Ken and Daniel scene plus Adam tries to put Tracy in the frame. 28th April Part 1 Adam is still in questioning while Tracy plans to go on the run.

1st May Part 1 Adam is released and looks for Tracy. Daniel’s not happy. Part 2 Adam’s still after Tracy and Amy. 3rd May Adam finds Tracy and Amy’s phones. 8th May Part 1 Tracy’s been found but Amy hasn’t and Ken still hasn’t forgiven Adam. Part 2 Daniel and Adam are at court as Tracy is about to confess... 12th May Part 1 Daniel scenes w/ Kate, Tracy, Sinead... 17th May Adam doing manual work but not being Spanish (w/ Rosie) 19th May Part 1 Part 2 Adam and Rosie ~investigate Daniel while he’s away, while cute as heck (Adam answering the door in pants alert~) 22nd May Part 1 Adam is watching Daniel.... before lowkey stuffing him in the boot of his car... Part 2 And trying to get him to confess. (ICONIC honestly, including ~that wall slamming scene) 24th May Adam is suspicious of Daniel and Sinead still. Daniel is questioned. Ken remembers sth. 26th May Part 1 Ken is trying to remember more, and suspects Daniel (at first) while Adam is told to sling his hook. (cute Adam and Rosie scene~) Part 2 Adam is arrested AGAIN. 29th May Corrie’s 9pm week begins! ~Finally leading to the conclusion of who attacked Ken - no Adam while he’s arrested, but Daniel’s in all eps. Some darker issues are dealt w/ in these eps so major TW’s for self harm, sexual assault and abuse (in Bethany’s sl) and mental illness. 30th May 31st May

1st June 2nd June 5th June Part 1 Part 2 Aftermath to 9pm week - Ken decides whether to press charges, and gets Adam from the police station. The rest of the Barlows’ reactions. 7th June Peter and Adam discuss his future, including his addiction, while Ken forgives Daniel. 9th June Part 2 Daniel tells Denise to leave again. 14th June Daniel’s isolated and depressed, and Adam doesn’t help (but does take a photo of Aidan/Maria snogging by the bins!) 16th June Part 1CW Drugs - an old drug dealer friend of Robert’s offers him drugs, to which he declines, but Daniel orders for him and takes an overdose. Part 2Robert and Adam find Daniel, CW hospitals~ (lovely Adam and Daniel scenes) 19th June Part 1Adam supports Daniel to see a counsellor, then leaves for London for 2 weeks. Part 2 Daniel and Robert scene. 26th June Part 1 Part 2 Couple of random Daniel scenes. 30th June Part 1 Chesney asks Daniel about the overdose.

3rd July Part 1 Adam returns and blackmails Aidan and Tracy is ~not pleased with Adam and Daniel being 2 psycho living together in domestic bliss. CW Violence Chesney gets stabbed. Part 2 Daniel helps Chesney (and makes a SHOCKING confession regarding his fave back to the future film). Adam schemes~ 5th July Adam starts his business (and has the loveliessst Mary scenes) while Ken is there for Daniel. 6th July Todd checks out ‘Barlow & Grimshaw’. 7th July Part 1 Todd signs on Adam’s dotted line~ 17th July Part 1 Part 2 Adam blackmails Aidan some more, then gets involved in Eva’s revenge plan. 19th July Eva and Adam plot against Aidan. 21st July Part 1 Part 2 Eva and Adam plan to get Eva an office job t oge the factory. 24th July Part 1 Part 2 Daniel reveals too much about the stabbing, Adam represents Chesney.

#coronation street #corrie #adam barlow #daniel osbourne #rob mallard #etc #links #m #eps #just !!! bc!!!#I need to know easily when things are anyway sh #but to make it easy to watch and find certain things #w/ cw's tw's #and yt vids for the main bits rather #and hopefully easy to see what's more interesting (november ~march)#and what is boring like some of december or when the who attacked ken sl kind of drags for a bit #+ may add old scenes/eps pre 2016 whch I'd def need to order to find again #daniel adam eps

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tramblings-world-blog · 6 years

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There once was a polka-dotted lady sat astride a motorcycle.

No, it wasn’t Michelle Pfeiffer in Grease 2.

It was Danielle Hope.

A simple mandolin flickered through the air as a woman crooned and commanded about a girl who went back to Napoli...

As she removed her simple black headscarf, little did she know that she would be creating a defining moment in cultural history.

Marilyn Monroe had ‘Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend’, Madonna had ‘Vogue’, and Danielle Hope had ‘Mambo Italiano’.

You may think, “Oh that Tom Ramsay, over egging the pudding as always” BUT anyone who has ever had a conversation for more than three minutes with me will be able to attest that this isn’t a passion put on for my *many* blog views (thank you Lee Mead fan pages - I promise I’ll give you more Lee analysis's if you stick with the blog) but that whereas some may obsess over Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance, or Barbara Streisand’s My Man, I’ve always vehemently praised Mambo Italiano, as performed by Danielle Hope in episode 11 of Over The Rainbow. (She also performed it in the final, so popular and iconic was her rendition that she had to be brought back, ala at the end of a Bernadette concert when she’s bowed and you’re crying and she starts to walk off stage and then you internally cry “But Bernie! You haven’t performed Being Alive yet!” And then of course she turns back around, with the toss of a wig and comes back to the mic to sing Sondheim’s anthem of life, striking the crucifix pose at the end. You weep some more. This was the same euphoric response Danielle received when she graced the world with more Mambo Italiano in an even more fiery dress. #ItalianoSquared But I might do a separate analysis of the finale version of Italiano so shall cease and desist from discussing it here.)

The song begins with the ballad-esque refrain, but in a very controversial move, Danielle refuses to be confined to the staircase of ballads, and demanded that Lord Lloyd Webber ring his friend Jim Steinman (co-lyricist of Whistle Down the Wind with ALW) and ask him to ring *his* friend Meat Loaf, and ask, or rather command, that he lease the BBC the use of his motorbike that he rides in The Rocky Horror Picture Show as he crashes in through the freezer for Danielle to sit upon for the first 17 seconds of the song. I have no proof of this to be the true origin story of the motorbike, but I like to think that if Wolverine got an origin film, so should the Mambo Italiano motorbike. So that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

We then reach the bridge between the opening refrain and the mambo itself, which brings us to an interesting, and important, juncture. As this performance was thankfully committed to video, and thus can be viewed for years to come as a historic performance in the V&A, we can confirm that at 00:23 seconds Danielle winks to the camera. What is unclear to me is whether this is a conscious performance choice, or a nervous twitch. I’ve brought in my good friend Angela Lansbury, famed TV detective, to get her view on the case, but the results have come back inconclusive. This was a case too hard even for Jessica Fletcher.

The above is gif evidence of Angela being confunded by the case.

And the above is actual footage of Angie meeting Lee Mead. SEE LEE MEAD FANS I TOLD YOU THERE’D BE MORE MEAD CONTENT.

But yes, as Angela’s sleuthing came back without a firm result, we are going to assume that the wink was a choice, and a marvellous one at that.

So Danielle has removed her black head scarf, and as the beat kicks in proceeds to use it as a WEAPON. If this was a game of Cleudo, the murderer would be Danielle Hope, in the BBC studios, with a head scarf. As someone who has drunkenly recreated this choreography in my living room, I can confirm first hand that getting the scarf over the gentleman’s head is a challenge, made only harder by the intricate steps of “pull, pull, pull, unloop it and over shoulder, kick, stamp stamp, round and round the carousel, head head head, pull on scarf and twirl it in, then you’re arms are flailing and your hips they are a-lazy” (sing this to the main tune, and it fits perfectly.)

It is at this point that she ups the ante, knowing that the stakes are very high if she wants to topple Connie from her “performance where the dancer is a piece of meat to me” stakes, so she goes for the classic “more is better” mantra and gives herself a full bouquet of men. Side bar, the scarf gets thrown to one of the resting dancers sat at a table who proceeds to SNIFF THE SCARF FOR A FEW SECONDS. Watch at 00:44 and keep your eyes peeled for it. This is a bigger moment than the time I realised one of Potiphar’s slaves sniffs Mrs Potiphar’s shoes in the Donny Osmond film. Go and check. It happens. It’s weird.

She then takes ultimate ownership as one of her bevvy of gentlemen dancer friends rises up to speak to her and she sends her back down.

It is at this moment that I realise I have fourteen minutes until the deadline for this blog, and I am less than a third into the video... And I don’t think I can do justice to the magnitude of all the wonderful small details that are littered throughout Italianio. So. Well done! You reached the end of Part One of our VERY SPECIAL, ALWAYS PLANNED TWO PART ESSAY ON DANIELLE HOPE’s MAMBO ITALIANO! Come back tomorrow for the rest of the juicy dissection of the greatest thing witnessed on British television since... England won the world cup? The Tram crash on Corrie? CUSTARD GATE ON BAKEOFF? We can all agree, it’s a cultural landmark. See you tomorrow!

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