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subcutaneous7 · 7 years

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Five Minutes- [Grace/Frankie]- Chapter 3

Thanks for all the love so far! Hope you enjoy this next part (: Full chapter here on A03.

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Frankie felt like her head was no longer attached to her body. Some days were like that, mostly after a few too many bong rips. But this…this was not that.

Ever since she kissed Grace, or Grace kissed her, or whatever combination of fear and desire conspired to bring their bodies together, she could think of nothing else. This is so not wise, kept telling herself like a hopeless mantra, trying to talk herself out of it, which was ridiculous because she had been fully, deeply in it long before the kiss. She didn’t know exactly when, but it had been a while, and it was too late now to turn back. She’d tried the whole denial thing, and that, like always, blew up in the most spectacularly painful of ways, wounding another person in the process. A very kind person, one whose yams were delicious and whose company made her feel safe and cared for, if not totally excited or inspired.

These were crazy times, and Frankie stuck to her mission of establishing new boundaries with Grace as best she could, given that she now knew what kissing Grace felt like. Frankie wasn’t sure she’d ever been kissed like that, not even by Sol. Not that there was anything wrong with the way he kissed, or their lovemaking. What they had was beautiful, even if her memories of it had been tainted by lies. But their last time together wasn’t the only time it felt forced, polite more than passionate, like something they both felt they should do because that’s what people who loved each other did. They were so young when they met, and it had been fun then, full of laughter and experimentation. But over time it grew into more of a meditation on their commitment, a spiritual exercise rather than true worship of each other’s physical and emotional forms, and truly, Frankie longed for both.

With Grace, ironically, she felt worshipped. Even in the briefest of moments they’d shared so far, Frankie felt more ecstatic, more alive than she had with anyone in years. Grace oozed sexuality. She was full of fire, sometimes too much, playful and eager, at least until her head got too involved. She was soft and firm in all the best places, incredibly sweet and a huge pain in the ass, a gorgeous mess of contradictions. She was also shockingly strong for a woman made of toothpicks, but that was a good thing, because Frankie never felt as unsteady on her feet as she did these days.

It wasn’t just Grace. The stroke had knocked her back more than she was willing to admit. She was recovering slowly but surely, but it was still a process. It certainly made her not want to waste any more time, but that’s exactly what she’d asked Grace for: time. That was the only way she could think to protect herself, even if she knew her heart was already too far gone to put a fence around. Grace and her stupid soft skin and comically chiseled cheekbones had done Frankie in, not to mention the exquisite way she smelled, her persistent nagging, her intense desire to look out for her, or the indescribable bliss and relief she felt just being in Grace’s presence. That was why it hurt so much to not spend every waking moment together lately, but that’s what Frankie needed, and she figured it was about time she took charge of her own needs for once.

“Good morning,” Grace greeted cheerfully as she came downstairs, fully dressed for the day. “What is that?”

“A peanut butter and banana smoothie,” Frankie shared, flinging another scoop into the blender.

“That’s not a smoothie,” Grace debated, smirking as she shook her head. “That’s a liquefied sandwich.”

“Well you don’t have to eat it,” Frankie retorted. “I made eggs too if you want some of those.”

“Thanks, but I’m meeting Robert for breakfast,” she told her, grabbing a bottled water from the fridge.

“Oh. Okay.” Frankie deflated. “That’s sweet, actually, you two spending time together.”

“Never thought you’d see the day, did you?”

“Definitely not,” Frankie smiled. “Not even in one of my vision quests.”

“I’ll be home later though,” Grace stood at a safe distance, perched at the other end of the island. “What about you?”

“Not sure yet,” Frankie sighed. “Coyote asked if I could help him scout some locations for his tiny house. I don’t know how long that will take.”

“Ah, got it,” Grace smiled sweetly, backing away. “I guess I’ll just…see you when I see you then.”

“You will,” Frankie nodded. “I’m never that far.”

Grace looked like she wanted to say more, so much more. Her forehead was all crinkled, eyes so sad and blue, it took everything Frankie had not to scoop her up and make her see how badly she wanted things to be okay, wanted to skip ahead to the good parts. But this was healthy, for now. This was the way it needed to be.

“Alright then,” Grace headed for the front of the house. “See you later.”

“Alligator,” Frankie couldn’t resist, shutting her eyes when she heard the door close.

She flipped on the blender, drowning out her self-pitying thoughts with the sound, letting it run a little longer than she normally would have, until the substance was good and mixed. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she began pouring it into the tallest glass she could find, but soon enough she heard knocking.

“Did your forget your keys again?!” she shouted as she grinned, slowly making her way to the front door. “I knew you wanted a smoothie too. Good thing I made extra…”

She halted immediately when she turned the corner, spying Jacob on the other side of the glass, heart catapulting into her throat.

Her first impulse was to hide, duck behind the sofa and pretend she wasn’t home, but he’d already seen her. He was waving in fact, smiling just enough to show he wasn’t there to make her life miserable, as far as she could tell. That wasn’t Jacob’s style anyway, but she still hadn’t expected to see him just yet. That wasn’t in the plan for today.

“Hey,” she swallowed as she opened the door.

“Hi there,” he breathed. “Can I come in?”

“Sure,” she stepped aside, letting him pass through the hall, following him into the kitchen as she fidgeted. “Grace isn’t here. Not that…that matters, I mean…just, in case you were…”

“I know,” he nodded. “I saw her car pull out of the driveway as I was coming down the street.”

“Oh. Well…good.”

“I figured you’d be in here making one of your famous smoothies,” he smiled sadly. “I just wanted to bring some of your stuff back.”

He handed her the box he’d been carrying. She hadn’t even noticed it at first.

“My geodes,” she set the contents on the counter. “I guess I do leave a trail of them everywhere I go, don’t I?”

“You do.”

“You know, chrysocolla is really good for balancing the Earth energies in the home. That’s why I put it in the northeast corner. Are you sure you don’t want…”

“No,” he shook his head. “Thank you though.”

“What about my throat singing tape?” she lifted it out of the box. “I thought you said they made the yams bigger and more…yammy.”

“Frankie,” he exhaled, leaning against the counter with one hand. “I can’t.”

“Can’t what?” she questioned. “Let the yams get any bigger? Are they taking over the other crops? Are they sprouting legs and threatening to take you over? Because legend has it…”

“No,” he put a hand on her shoulder, grimacing before pulling away. “I can’t…do this.”

“Oh,” she whispered, her best efforts to dodge this awkwardness averted. “I get it.”

He stared at her for a few moments, as if he were questioning all her decisions, giving her one of those looks that made her feel like she’d kicked a giant puppy, or maybe several dozen puppies. It was almost more than she could take.

“Jacob…” she swallowed. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done what I did over the phone. But I had to do it.”

“It wasn’t much of a surprise, honestly,” he admitted. “When I saw you the last time, you made it pretty clear where you stood.”

“I know,” she nodded. “But still, I…”

“I guess…” he continued wearily. “I just thought we really had something. I thought…well, I was pretty sure you loved me.”

“I did,” she sighed painfully. “I do.”

“But?” he tried to help her out.

“But…” she swallowed harder, not wanting to say it, but knowing she needed to. “…not in the way you deserve to be loved.”

“Because you love someone else?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

She froze, a wave of fear and nerves crashing through her, the voices in her head silenced by the accusation. She was in no way ready to acknowledge her feelings to the outside world, not to anyone other than the “someone else” in question, but she figured if Jacob was asking, if he already knew, the least she could do was be honest. She would have wanted the same.

Slowly, she lifted her eyes back up to him, taking a deep breath, before nodding yes.

“Well,” he sighed. “That’s how this all started too, isn’t it? Except with Sol? Your heart was never completely in it. At least I know it now.”

“I’m sorry,” she repeated.

“I know,” he breathed. “I just hope you’re not repeating patterns.”

“Me too,” Frankie held her hand to her sternum, clutching the amethyst hanging around her neck. “But I think this is different.”

“I hope so,” he nodded. “For your sake.”

“Can we be friends?” she asked. “Please?”

“I don’t think we can,” he told her flatly, but kindly. “At least…not now. Maybe one day.”

“I’d like that,” she swallowed back tears. “I never meant to hurt you, Jacob.”

“I know,” he smiled softly, reaching for her shoulder again. “Take care, Frankie.”

“You too,” she whispered, squeezing his hand, before letting go.

She watched him walk out the door, closing it behind him, leaving her alone with her smoothie and a new sense of closure, but no less hurt.

She took a long, decadent gulp of her creation, making her way to the living room, opening the doors, letting the warm breeze, the smell of salt wash over her. There was at least an hour until she had to pick up Coyote. She took a seat on one of her fluffiest floor cushions, breathing in the ocean, breathing out the pain, hoping the voices in her head would stay silent until they were ready to tell her it was okay to move forward.

Read the rest on A03.

#grace and frankie #grace x frankie #grace hanson #frankie bergstein #femslash #femslash fanfiction #aaahhhh i can't stop writing help #don't help i love it #hope people enjoy! <3

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benegap · 7 years

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Speedy Recovery: Healing From Injury, Surgery, or Other Trauma

This subject is near and dear to my heart after both a recent injury and surgery that affected my back, abdomen and nervous system. It was a true test of my knowledge of how to repair the body, my willingness to get the help I needed, and my patience (with which I am not that blessed)! I admit that I had moments that I thought I would never get better and had pain so severe that I had to use prescription painkillers. Given my natural aversion to drugs, this was a big deal for me! The good news is that I am feeling much better and nutrition and supplements were a crucial part of my healing process. After my own experience I want to pass on what I have learned. If you have experienced any trauma to the body, including surgery, an injury, or just prolonged stress that has affected your physical health, there is something here for you.

The most surprising part of this whole process has been all of the ancillary issues I had to deal with due to the surgery. First there was the pain in my throat from the trache tube—slippery elm lozenges got rid of that in a snap. Then there was the pain from the catheter—the perfect job for marshmallow root. For laparoscopic surgery they pump you full of CO2 gas. You can suffer the discomfort of that for a week or you can take fennel tincture to get rid of it in a couple days. The brain fog was the worst. I couldn’t call up words, forgot what I was saying mid-sentence, and was overall just dull-witted! Needless to say that was kind of frightening and was aggravated by the pain meds I had been on. No loss, though, because I was able to try PQQ, a nutrient from which three recent studies have shown positive effects on the brain. I used a combination of CoQ10 and PQQ with great results! It took about a month, but definitely got my marbles back!

I would love to say that there is an herb or combination of herbs that will alleviate severe pain but if there is I don’t know about it. Before I had the surgery I was in so much pain that I had to take the pain meds. The goal, of course, is to use them as little as possible and get off of them as quickly as possible. The brain fog, damage to the stomach lining, and potential for addiction argue for using them wisely.

The Acute Phase

Immediately after trauma, the body responds with inflammation. The homeopathic remedy arnica, 200 CK or above, works really well to minimize inflammation and swelling at the time of the injury or surgery. I took arnica 200 ck the day before and the morning of my surgery, as well as for 4-5 days after. This works amazingly well for pain too. After my surgery, I only had to use the pain meds a couple of times. The only caution for this is if you are required to take Coumadin after your surgery (required in many hip replacements). There is some evidence that arnica can thin the blood so paring it with a blood thinner may cause additive effects. If the injury or surgery affects any area that is nerve-rich such as the back, the eyes, the hands or feet, then alternate the arnica with hypericum. Hypericum will assist in nerve healing. Healing of the nerves can also be accomplished with the B vitamins, particularly B12 and benfotiamine (B1). When bone is involved, use the cell salts Calc Phos, Calc Flor and Silica internally to heal the bone.

Proteolytic enzymes, taken between meals, are essential to quelling the inflammatory response. These enzymes, if taken with a meal, will be used to digest your food. If taken between meals, they will actually help your body “digest” inflammatory substances. These enzymes should be taken several times per day for 2-3 days after the initial trauma. I don’t recommend enzymes when the injury or surgery involves the digestive tract. The tract will need to be healed before the use of enzymes is advisable. Also, you may want to avoid these if you been on pain meds for a while. The idea is to use them instead of the pain meds, if possible. There are many herbs that quell inflammation including turmeric, boswellia, ginger, and cayenne pepper. Bioflavonoids can also reduce inflammation. These can be found separately or in combination formulas.

Vitamins A, C, & E are very important to healing tissue, including the skin. Sea buckthorn is high in these vitamins, and also adds the benefit of omega-7 for healing the internal and external “skin”. Add sea buckthorn for speedy healing of incisions and any damage done to tissue by surgical instruments. Vitamin E can help prevent excess scar tissue.

Quality protein is important when healing from an injury or surgery. Proteins are used for the manufacture of new tissue, repair of old tissue, making hormones and making the enzymes necessary for body processes. Whey protein powder is perfect for building muscle as it is high in the branched chain amino acids, which are used for this purpose. It also has immune-building benefits so can keep your immunity up while you are rehabilitating. There are also vegan proteins that contain soy, brown rice, hemp protein, cranberry protein, pea protein, or some combination of these that are good sources.

Omega-3s in the form of fish oil, a multivitamin, and a probiotic are base nutrients that will assist the body in repair. A multi will assure that you have a base level of nutrients like Vitamin D and zinc that help with healing. Omega-3s will help with cell renewal and repair, and probiotics will replace the good bacteria depleted by any antibiotics. They will also prevent illness while you recover. I personally did a healing shake every morning and here is the recipe:

2 scoops whey protein

1 oz sea buckthorn juice by Genesis

1/2 c. raspberries, cherries, beets or strawberries (good for blood building)

1 c. organic coconut water

5 large ice cubes

2 tsp Udo’s oil (for omega fats, optional if doing fish oil separately)

2 tsp powdered Vitamin C by Healthforce

Handful of greens (spinach, arugula, or kale)

¼ avocado

Local honey to taste

Add to a blender and blend away!

And last of all REST. Any injury or surgery is a trauma to the body and trying to “power through” will not do you any favors. You will do yourself more harm than good if you try to get up and about too soon. Putting pressure on the affected area will cause more swelling and inflammation and will use the energy that your body could devote to healing.

The Sub-Acute Phase

After 3 days it is time to move around a little more. Doing some movement will help the lymph system to clear toxins and get circulation flowing to the affected areas. Move in any way that you are able, even if it means just circling your hands and feet while laying down. Continue with anti-inflammatory herbs and arnica. For an injury where connective tissue is involved, take a supplement that supports the regeneration of that tissue. Several are available, but look for these ingredients: UC-II type collagen, amino acids proline, lysine, and glycine, vitamin C, MSM, manganese, turmeric, glucosamine and chondroitin, and silica.

A B-complex will assist in the digestion of food and make sure you have adequate energy reserves to do the work of healing. It will help repair any nerves that were damaged in the injury or surgery. It also helps the body recover from the stress of the trauma and any worry you have about not being able to perform your regular duties. Continue the multi, the omega-3, and the probiotics. This basic nutrition will ensure that the body has a base level of all the nutrients you need to get better.

If you can get out of the house I highly recommend doing acupuncture, reiki, or other energy treatment. These treatments can help the body get back into balance, which is crucial to overall healing. If you have a chiropractor that uses kinesiology, electronic stimulation, or other non-invasive method that is helpful too. Don’t consider these things a luxury. Proper healing from injury or surgery prevents re-injury, excessive scar tissue, and ultimately, expensive medical bills down the road. I ran into a friend the other day that is having a second abdominal surgery because the scar tissue from the first surgery has wrapped around her intestines, causing a narrowing and the need for more surgery. If it’s not covered by your insurance do it anyway. You are worth it!

Once you are back to work, make sure you get adequate rest in the evening. It’s amazing what your kids can and will do when you really need them to help out (this includes your husband too). It is tempting to overdo, considering all of the things that are left undone while you are convalescing. Resist the temptation!

Maintenance and Well Care

After 2-3 weeks of doing the above you should feel quite good. At this time, you will probably be allowed to get back into the water. Since water is the nurturing element it is amazing for healing. The single most helpful thing I did to calm my nervous system and allow me to move without pain was to go in a warm water therapy pool. Evanston Athletic Club , the “Y”, the Park Center in Glenview and Galter Life Center on the north side of the city all have one. These pools are heated to 102 degrees, so will keep the muscles relaxed. At first all I could do was float and do very gentle movements, but within a couple weeks I could exercise in the water. The water supports you so that you can do what you could never dream of doing on land. If there was some emotional trauma associated with your accident/injury, then you might want to check out a therapy called Watsu. A practitioner does guided movements with you in the water and it is very nurturing and calming. If you can’t get out to a warm water pool then take a bath. Just relaxing in the tub will do wonders for your healing.

When we are injured or have surgery we tend to compensate with body movements that avoid pain to the affected area. This puts the musculoskeletal system out of balance. A chiropractor can be very helpful in re-balancing these compensations so that we don’t continue to use muscles in an unnatural way, potentially causing re-injury down the road. In my own case, I had been compensating for a long period of time due to two past injuries. In addition to chiropractic work I had to retrain my core, which I am still working on as we speak. It involved doing micro-movements called somatics. Basically, you have to re-teach the brain the correct movement. Make sure you work with someone that has an excellent knowledge of the muscle structure, compensating patterns that are common after certain injuries, and ways to retrain the body that prevent you from “cheating” and repeating the incorrect movements. I highly recommend Cindy at Fitness Defined. After just 3 weeks I have made so much progress.

Do any kind of exercise that your injury allows—walking, yoga, bike riding or swimming. Start slow and be okay with the fact that it may take months to get back to what you could do before. Heaven Meets Earth and One 2 One Yoga do restorative yoga with very gentle, supported movements. This is great for stress relief and giving the body some movement without stress on the joints. David from One 2 One has a great knowledge of the muscles and has been very helpful to me. I believe they will also come to your home.

Continue with the basic nutrition and focus on joint repair, reducing scar tissue, and any leftover inflammation. I found that once I began exercising more that the tissue in the area of the surgery would get inflamed and very hard. Homeopathic silica is useful for breaking up scar tissue. Topically, I used arnica and Traumeel on the affected area. Traumeel has homeopathic remedies for connective tissue, swelling and inflammation, and even bone. I also used anti-inflammatory herbs and nutrients like ginger, turmeric, boswellia, quercetin, and cayenne. Ginger is a personal favorite because it also promotes circulation, prevents colds & flu, and aids in digestion. It is a great add to a smoothie as well.

Once you are feeling really well think about doing a detoxification program. These programs last 10-21 days and are important for cleaning out all of the toxins in the body that can occur with injury and/or surgery. The body naturally produces free radicals and other toxic chemicals as we heal and we also want to remove any prescription drugs left in the system. By improving the functioning of the liver, we can ensure a full return to health. If you have specific questions, or would like to have a plan in place for an upcoming surgery, I do individual consultations with clients. I am especially adept at helping with trauma to the back and abdominal area. If you just have simple questions you are welcome to talk with me in the store as well. Good luck for a speedy recovery!

Lynn Bednar, CNC – (847) 864-1600

from Health Insure Guides http://ift.tt/2y3qc5s via health insurance cover

#health #health insurance #medicines #cures #healing #medical #treatment #Health Insure Guides

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