#Idk man... Ep 6 absolutely ruined my sanity

[softlyearning]

So Kinn, this hardened mafia heir (who is openly gay in a world so removed from kindness) has a self imposed rule of never kissing someone, yet he gives his kisses to Porsche willingly, freely.

Kinn, who presents his toughest exterior to the outside world, still fidgets and wrings his hands and stammers over his words in front of his father, someone he's probably scared of deep inside him (and someone who knows exactly what to say, to hit where it hurts the most), because somewhere deep down, he's still a young boy with a caring heart, thrust into this world of bloodshed and distrust against his will.

His father, who points out that Porsche is probably becoming a weakness, and Kinn, warring with his conscience, believes him anyway, because in their world, weakness is preyed upon and that price is paid with life. (And even if he didn't consciously realise it then, Porsche's life is not something he's willing to exchange, for anything in this world.)

Kinn, who says that all of his people are equal in his eyes, almost loses his mind with worry when Porsche goes missing, so much so that he doesn't even trust his best bodyguards to look after an unconscious Porsche when he's finally found.

Kinn, who never got to be a child (because really, his childhood was probably snatched away the day Tankhun got kidnapped) gets two whole days of freedom, and lets Porsche see him. His inner child.

For the first time, he doesn't have to suppress his laughs, doesn't have to watch his back for the next bullet, doesn't have to weave webs of complex words, doesn't have to flail open debtors. He gets to be excited about fishing, gets to marvel at a sunset sitting on top of a rundown truck, gets to share his dreams next to a campfire, gets to wake up slowly and peacefully, gets to breathe.

Kinn, who probably never sang after that one competition in his childhood (how could he, when his father bought the first spot with money) sings awfully just to please Porsche, because he's become just that comfortable with him. Become just that okay with Porsche's gentle teasing and goading, even wants it, just to see Porsche laugh at his expense.

Kinn, who trusts nobody, not even his closest and best bodyguards or his handful of friends and even keeps a distance from his overbearing father, is helpless in the face of Porsche's unbridled openness, his carefree smiles and his unwavering loyalty, and grows to trust him, almost against his will.

Kinn, who tastes his freedom in Porsche in those two days they are handcuffed together, but makes up his mind to let him go, just so Porsche could live his dream when he himself couldn't.

Because Kinn, who had had his heart broken before, chooses to fall in love again anyway.

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #kinn anakinn #porsche pachara #kinnporsche ep 6 #meta #Sort of? #Idk man... Ep 6 absolutely ruined my sanity #And while I am an unapologetic porsche stan #Kinn stole my heart in this ep #mine