#OR that poc are obligated to be nice to white people when they're disrespectful to them.

[mogai-sunflowers]

Am I the only one who really hated the year where the "nobody asked thing" happened a ton? It was used against me a lot whenever I overshared and as an autistic person I have trouble regulating that so I just stopped talking at all.

YEAH IT'S SO RUDE AND FOR NO FUCKING REASON??????????????? one time someone said that exact thing to me and i had a panic attack and felt so horrible but now looking back on it....... yes! yes you DID ask!!! because you made a public post with an opinion and gave absolutely no instruction as to who you wanted to respond! this is on YOU! /nay anon

#🌌written in the stars ; asks🌌 #im so sorry anon thats really sucky #u can overshare with me anytime and i wont be like that and im dead serious. #the way internet leftism practically requires you to be perfect is so fucking annoying #people act like if you aren't a part of a certain group that youre an asshole if you ever engage in convos about said group. #which is fucking RIDICULOUS!! #like for context #this person made a post sharing an opinion on unlearning racism. and i added my opinion because i too #am a person who has had to unlearn racism. what a shocker. #so i added on agreeing with their point and adding a little of my own insight. #and they responded saying they didnt ask for my white opinion and i needed to shut up #and its like. i understand and respect if you dont want white people interacting with your posts. but you DIDNT SAY THAT! #and sense you didnt i assumed that it was okay to add my opinion because THATS HOW HUMAN CONVERSATIONS WORK!!!! #it was perfectly normal for me to engage in a discussion on racism. i wasn't speaking on an issue i have no say in #i was simply talking about the importance of unlearning racism and doing the work because i have experience with that and its true. #this is true for all nuances and group dynamics im just talking about this rn #please dont get me wrong im not trying to undermine the importance of centering poc #and im not in any way trying to say that white people are always qualified to talk about racism or that we should always share our opinions #OR that poc are obligated to be nice to white people when they're disrespectful to them. #but my point is here that i was entirely within my lane #entirely respectful #but because i misinterpreted a social situation that was not at all clear i was suddenly the bad guy #and its infuriating because this has happened so many times. im not a bad person for getting shit wrong and its done so much and i mean SO #FUCKING #MUCH #harm to my mental health to think of myself as a failure because of my mistakes #it's just. ugh. stop

[clonehub]

Maybe one day I'll snap and truly stop being nice because what @milfcommandercody said on my lil essay is very true and YES I do want to go apeshit and start calling people bitches but the second any person of color anywhere says anything that's not nice we get called a bully. Folks keep accusing me of bullying and also of being white, for some reason. And they use both of those reasons to be like "see now I have no choice but to be racist and just sit here and not do anything about the racism I pretend to care about because those nasty ethnics the ~milfcrowd~ weren't super nice and holding my hand and wiping my ass >:(((((" Soon enough I'll fully lose it and we'll just see what happens from there.

But like the bizarreness in being fully rude and expecting nothing but civility in response. For several months now I've been getting nothing but racist responses to a post I made about antiBlackness and the fetishization of Black death on AO3. Someone said I didn't really care about Floyd's death and that I was just using it to coverup up my real goal, which was splitting everyone over support for AO3. Basically they called me a psyop. People accused me of just wanting censorship. Folks spread lies about who the real author of the fucked up fic I was referencing was. And then people kept making it about purity culture (a vicious form of oppression women in religious fundamentalist societies have to suffer under where their value as a human being is tied to their sexual purity for their husbands--not about fucking fanfiction) and THEN they started talking about """antis""" mind you, I'd come in saying "you people need to fucking do something about racist fanfictions. Something. Anything. Because as much as it's a community, clearly most of the members don't care."

And I think the funniest part of it all was when someone sarcastically said "you can't expect all your media to be pure". You know. Speaking down to a Black person about what I can and can't expect for Black people in media. I said the world will end before y'all start respecting Black people and they went to the lengths of changing their URL. Which is funny because two posts down they had reblogged something about listening to BIPOC.

And another person made a comment about antis just wanting this and that, and naturally I snapped and they started getting anons about how they should stay safe and "I hope nothing comes of this I hope it doesn't blow up" I'm sure y'all have seen my responses to those. I'm not nice. It's antiBlackness. my Black ass is not obligated to be nice to folks who just straight up disrespect Black people. Chew on it.

But then I remember those people who say "hmmm they're right but they're rude about it so ultimately I won't do anything :/" and it's like woooow you really really don't care then. You never cared! Youve centered your ego in your "activism" and I stg if you check these people pages they hardly say or do anything in support of PoC. Or even worse when they talk about supporting PoC but then they just reblog racist shit anyways dnsknsks "performative activist" the call is coming from inside the house! Accusing me and my friends and my friends friends' of being performative activists because of tone. Because our tone made you uncomfortable. Because you're assuming that we're not doing tangible work to support the groups that we're trying to defend on here--which is clown behavior through and through lmao.

I don't know where im going with this. I guess I'm mad. This shits tiring. Its exhausting. it's anxiety inducing for me and all my friends. I know for a fact that if me and my friends all shut up right now about racism in the fandom, racism in star wars, and racism in general, those that criticize us wouldn't change their behavior at all. They'd continue to not reblog PSAs about racism. They'd continue to not bother educating themselves or others about racism. They're not in the notes of even the basically informational posts about these things. These posts hardly even exist on their blogs. They prefer to reblog and write essays about bullying and fandom drama and antis and all the other things (mostly white) fandom mom types like to latch onto. They don't care and they never cared and they have the nerve to say we're defending ourselves wrong.

(please do not reblog 🤗 I'm just ranting and there's hardly cohesion to this post. But feel free to comment if you like)

#CH posts #long post #racism tw #antiBlackness #antiBlackness tw #when i say im fucking tired #naur bc these people dont point out any problems ever on their own #let me stop before i just start saying names