#Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Working on corpses, a bit graphic, cutting open of bodies, organ removal, what Coroner’s usually do, cursing AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 11 - Inspections

Kenspeckle got out two Scalpels and gave one to M/n. He took it and carefully cut into one of the eyes. Black liquid started to leak out almost as soon as the eye was opened. M/n cringed. The only thing he hates was testing, inspecting and cutting open eyeballs...

“These...these are Necromancy remains.”, Kenspeckle informed.

“Looks like black ink to me...”, M/n muttered.

“Necromancy is black.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Is that how they died ?”, Ghastly asked.

Kenspeckle shook his head.

“No. This just means that Necromancy killed them. If Necromancy killed a person, it stays in the body and after a certain time, the eyes turn black and this will happen when you cut the eye open.”, the Doctor answered.

“So we need to find the place, the Necromancy hit most in the bodies. In other words...we have to cut them open and get all the organs out for further inspections...”, M/n stated dryly.

“Yes.”, Kenspeckle confirmed.

“Yay. Okay then. Sister, turn your ass around. No more show for you.”, M/n told Stephanie.

“Noted.”, she replied and turned around.

With that Kenspeckle and M/n got ready to open up the bodies.

“Before you cut the body open, Corrupted.”, Kenspeckle called M/n’s attention on him.

“Yes, Professor Grouse ?”, M/n replied, with an interested voice.

“Be careful. There could be a possibility that Necromancy will leak out of the body. Cut it open carefully and slowly.”

“Noted, Sir.”

“Good. Then let’s not waste any more time.”

With that they both started at the same time, to open the bodies. Kenspeckle was right. Black started to leak out of the cut in the torso. M/n was a bit shocked, but he’s seen worse.

-Time skip-

They had almost all the organs out at this point. M/n could tell it had been a bit over two hours. He took out the organs and Kenspeckle inspected them. Almost all of the organs were filled with black. The Necromancy spread, but they HAD the find the place it hit in and had the most Necromancy inside. Kenspeckle could do that better than M/n, so he did that and M/n gave him the organs.

“We know the organs that were hit first now, Skulduggery.”, Kenspeckle informed, after the last organ from the second body was examined.

“Oh ? The hearts ?”, the Skeleton asked.

Kenspeckle shook his head.

“No. Ghastly do you have pen and paper ready to note it down ?”

“I have, Professor.”

M/n leaned back and had his left thigh resting on his desk, looking at the three Mages. Kenspeckle told him already and he was slightly disgusted, that someone would do something like that.

“Number eight was drowned from Necromancy. You heard me right. The Necromancy hit his lungs and it filled them up, making the victim drown from it alone. He must have been the one to claw at number seven’s leg. Eight must have been in a war with himself as he was drowning in Necromancy. He could have been forced to hurt his partner, as the Necromancy took over his dying body and mind, hence the burn mark.”, Kenspeckle explained the first case.

“So he threw himself around ?”, Ghastly asked.

“No. Number eight was thrown around. It could be that victim seven fought back, or it happened before the Necromancy was forced into his body, by the killer. Number seven had the most Necromancy in his brain though. Or at least...what remained of it.”, M/n stated.

“What...remained of it ?”, Stephanie asked her Brother, back still to them.

“The Necromancy took care to make the brain explode inside the victim’s skull. There were only small remains, the rest must have bled out of his mouth and nose, which must have been cleaned off by one of the oafs that picked the bodies up and brought them here. The small pieces, that, I found and got out, showed us that it had the most Necromancy, which means, that it was the spot, which got infected first. I am unsure if we should inspect the bones too, just to make absolutely sure.”, M/n shortly explained.

Ghastly wrote it all on the paper, his breath very heavy.

“Fucking hell...”, the tailor muttered out in shock.

“Language ! Not in front of my little Sister.”, M/n scolded.

“You curse all the time.”, Stephanie deadpanned.

“I am a special case, Sister. Now shush.”

“Fine...”

“We should inspect the bones.”, Kenspeckle told M/n.

“Well then, let me get the machine ready. I need to see if the idiots emptied it and then I need to fill in the chemicals, which will melt away everything and give us the bones. Oh !”

M/n turned back around and gave Skulduggery a camera.

“Make pictures. You know, for evidence. We have pics of the corpses, the location they were found in, as in the state, and their nude forms too, so the bruises were already taken into account. This is the examination process and then comes the bone examination evidence in pictures. My Sis can’t take the pictures, Ghastly has to note down, Kenspeckle has to prepare and I have a machine to take care of, so YOU take the pictures. I hope you know how to operate a photo Camera.”, M/n said and then left again.

Skulduggery gave M/n’s back a bemused face.

“How stupid and old does he take me for ? Of course I know how to take pictures and how to operate a photo Camera...”, Skulduggery muttered.

“You are a few centuries old, Skulduggery and usually old people don’t like technology.”, Kenspeckle fires at the Skeleton Detective.

Skulduggery looked at the Professor, then muttered something and started to take pictures from different angles, even from the examined organs.

After a while, M/n came back and told Kenspeckle to bring the first body. After 30 minutes they came back with just the bones remaining of the first body, then they did the second one and another 30 minutes later they came back with these two.

“There are specks of Necromancy engraved into the bones.”, Kenspeckle said.

“Yes, which means the Necromancy was used violently, quick and not carefully. It was hectic.”, M/n confirmed.

“So the bones are infected too.”, Skulduggery stated softly.

“Yes, they are, but they were only infected slightly. The fight was hectic, which means it wasn’t precise. After the Necromancy spread over the whole body, the bones got small remaining specks of it too. Imagine it like a knife was used. Someone stabbed quickly and in a rush, sometimes you put a lot more strength into your blows, than you planned, and then you hit bone. The Necromancy specks, on the bones, are like scratches of a knife. They are messy and not at all the cause of death, just a symbol of more damage.”, M/n explained shortly.

He looked at his Sister and sighed.

“If you can look at human skeletons, you can look, Sister.”

Stephanie turned around and looked at the bones. She saw them white and black. The specks of Necromancy were the black spots then. Ghastly noted it all down and Skulduggery took pictures.

Kenspeckle continued to look at the bones, while M/n stood back and drank a few gulps of water. He didn’t drink anything until now, so it was needed.

“How long have we been here ?”, Stephanie asked.

“At least 3 hours. Could be four too.”, M/n answered his Sister.

She stared at her Brother.

“That long already ?!”

“What are you talking about ? This is the fastest I’ve ever been. I am usually forced to work all alone and do everything at once, because my coworkers don’t do shit. I am usually sitting on ONE corpse for at least SIX hours. And don’t you even dare to calculate the time for the report making in there, that takes another two hours. This is fast, because everyone is actually helping me here, for once !”, M/n informed his Sister, with a slight edge to his voice.

She stared at him in horror with her mouth tightly shut. Kenspeckle looked at M/n in confusion and worry.

“Why don’t you tell your Boss about it ?”, Kenspeckle asked.

“Because he won’t listen.”, M/n sighed out and messaged the bridge of his nose.

“You tried ?”

“Multiple times. This is one reason why the older Coroner left in the end with the few people that did at least SOMETHING to help. He asked me, if I wanted to come along, but I didn’t want to be a bother, so I decided that I will take over everything. I am still in contact with the other Coroner, but...well...I barely talk to him. He is a nice man though.”

“Huh, what a shame...”, Kenspeckle said in disappointment.

M/n shrugged his shoulders at that.

“Humans can be blind and oblivious sometimes. Don’t sweat it, Professor.”

“Kenspeckle is just fine, kid.”

“Okay, first name stage it is then.”

“You are way too formal, Corrupted.”, Ghastly chuckled out.

“I got raised like that. It is supposed to show manners. Sorry.”, M/n replied.

“You can call everyone by the first name. We Mages don’t have a big problem with that.”, Skulduggery informed M/n.

“Okay, noted for next time.”, the Teen replied.

“Good.”

“So are we done ?”, Stephanie asked.

“We are. There is nothing else to find.”, Kenspeckle replied.

Just then M/n spotted something on the skull.

“Kenspeckle ? There is a tear in the skull of victim seven. A small crack, but it is still there, that can’t be from the brain explosion, right ?”, the Teen asked.

The Professor came over and his eyes widened.

“Huh...no it is not from that, indeed. I will take a closer look. It seems like...there was something there. Something small...”

Kenspeckle took the skull and left to inspect it further. M/n turned to Ghastly.

“Ghastly ? Give me the notes you made on number eight. I better write the finishing report about it now. It will be more in order and you will have very little to explain.”, the Teen told the tailor.

Ghastly got out the notes from victim eight, gave it M/n and watched as the boy left and sat down on a small computer. He turned the PC on and soon enough you heard mouse clicking and the keyboard being used.

M/n was very focused and even had his glasses back on his face.

“Why and since when do you need glasses, Bubba ?”, Stephanie asked.

“I only need them for near sight. I am far sighted and when things are near or close to my face, it gets blurry and I can’t read anything. No worries, Sister. I don’t need them all the time.”

“Okay...”

With that M/n continued to type and click away, every now and then he looked at Ghastly’s notes and then continued to type.

Kenspeckle came back 15 minutes later and he seemed concerned. Skulduggery had a face of concern too then.

“What is it, Kenspeckle ?”

“Well, something was hidden in his skull. I suspect a small micro chip. I have no idea what it might have been used for, but it seems it got taken. The Killer must of have taken it.”

“A micro chip ?”, M/n asked in worry.

“Yes, why ?”

“I know ONE small Micro chip kind like that. It can have important information on them, but in that case I think it was used for something else. It can be used as a tracker and spying device. If I am correct, that means the Killer could have known all along about them spying on him/her. But for that, either the Killer themselves must of inserted the chip, or someone must have convinced the victim to take it, as safety precaution and then told the Killer, knowingly. In other words, if my tracking and spying theory is correct...”

“The traitor must be in the Sanctuary.”, Kenspeckle concluded.

M/n nodded.

“We all assume that Serpine killed them, after all he was their last mission to spy on and they went missing in the middle of the operation and ended up here on my table. No one would have let Serpine fumble on them, so I suppose it was one from the Sanctuary. Not many knew about the spies on Nefarian’s ass, so I assume it was only a handful. The handful being: Mr. Bliss, Eachan Meritorius, Morwenna Crow, Sagacious Tome, the Administrator and the Doctor, who did the transplant.”, M/n concluded.

Everyone was staring at him.

“I know, you hate to think it was one of them, but they are the only ones, so far, that definitely knew about them spying on Serpine.”

“Why would the Elders want to help Serpine ? They made him stop in the first place, mostly Meritorius.”, Skulduggery defended.

“And Mr. Bliss helped us.”, Stephanie defended.

“Mr. Bliss knew they went missing and were set on Serpine. He also knew that the Sceptre was real and found. He has motives and he was sus to me, the moment he approached us. He knew a lot and yet didn’t try to get the Elders to wake up. Maybe Meritorius isn’t involved in this at all, but he was very convinced that nothing was wrong. I’ve seen his fear of the possibility of the truce being broken, so I do admit that I also doubt him to be the traitor. Miss Crow was a bit shady, but that was because of the show she put on, nothing else. What discipline does she have ?”

“Necromancy. When she appeared, she shadow walked. It is a type of teleportation, but they can’t do that for a long distance.”, Skulduggery informed.

“Then I doubt it was her either. The traitor and Serpine would have to meet a long distance away from public areas and avoid the spies of catching onto their betrayal. If you see shadows emerge from nowhere you already know it could be Crow, so she is out of the question. The Administrator ?”

“He is barely outside of the Sanctuary. Mostly stays in there and practically lives there, for safety reasons.”, Ghastly answered.

“Okay. Then tell me...what is Tome’s ability ?”

“He is a Teleporter.”

“Any restrictions in that Sorcery ?”

“He can only teleport to places, he has been at before.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Nothing else ? No limit of the distance ? No give away when he appears ? He just comes and goes, like a ghost ?”, M/n pressed.

The Mages were dead silent, Stephanie stared at M/n and was concerned. M/n hummed and pointed gun fingers at the three silent Mages.

“Got cha a possible perpetrator, right there. He can teleport, appear out of nowhere and disappear just as quickly. He has connections to higher places. He gets informed about everything from Crow and Meritorius and he seemed to be a very quiet man too. Easy to forget about, easy to not suspect of treason.”

“And his Motive ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“Maybe Serpine brainwashed him. Maybe he always worked for him. When you talked about Serpine, it sounded like he is capable of anything and everything, if he has to. Who knows, maybe he threatened Tome or something.”

“That is just a speculation.”, Ghastly said softly.

M/n whistled softly and looked at the tailor.

“Look, we can easily find that out. We will leave that Detail out for now, note it down, but I will NOT add it in. You get this stuff to Meritorius tomorrow, Skulduggery, while I will inspect my Uncle later too, if the Corpse is still there, considering that there is a high danger that Serpine destroyed it, to kill evidence. You tell the three of them what YOU have found Skulduggery, no word about me, until Gordon’s case. You make them believe that YOU drew the connections. I will put some small spies on your suit and they will go to the people I want them to spy on. If Tome meets up with Serpine, we will know.”, M/n suggested.

“Small spies ?”, Kenspeckle asked.

M/n smiled and opened his hand, there was a small robot in his hand, and it was active too.

“May I introduce to you, the ultimate little spy. They can be so small, that you can barely see them, they can cling onto you anywhere, even when you are naked. You can’t feel them moving on you. They can record everything with very great volume and video quality and they can instantly notify you when something is happening. Easy to command and easy to program. You slap a picture or a name into their system and they chase the person down. Pictures are easier, but names do it too. There is mostly only ONE person, with the names you people take, so it will be a walk in the park for them.”

They all eyed the small robot and watched as it got smaller and moved around. Then M/n’s phone dinged and as he opened it, there was a notification from his bot that he was live and ready. M/n showed it to them and then another message came, which said ‘Conversation happening’.

M/n opened the message and they saw themselves from the bot’s cameras, faces clear and sharp on the screen of the phone.

“Okay...”, Ghastly said.

The phone played the voice after him too, almost no delay in sending it through too. The audio was spot on and sharp. They all were in awe. M/n smirked.

“They are our key to winning. So what do you say, Skulduggery ? Are you in ?”, M/n asked.

He looked at M/n with a smirk. This will be fun~

“I’m in.”, he replied.

Masterlist HERE !

#read warnings above #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 11 - Inspections #skulduggery pleasant #male!reader #not the canon au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #stephanie edgley #my au #derek landy #Kenspeckle Grouse

[update-blog-bp9]

Kay...

I got two things out today and I am planning to make the "M/n's Pet" (Aka. the William Afton x Male!Reader episodes) its own Masterlist. The SP Fanfic is going smoothly and I might be able to get another Chapter of that one out today too. Depends on how my mood will continue to go. It's one of these days were I had no strength to even get out of bed today, but I don't want to slack off either, so I might as well. ^^

#update #skulduggery pleasant #five nights at freddy's #male!reader #William Afton/Dave Miller x Reader #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

Part 9 – The Vault

As they were outside, Ghastly and Skulduggery had their disguises back on and stared at something. M/n looked around quickly, but in a way, no one noticed, while his Sister started to panic. Then he saw the man and he pointed at him for Stephanie.

The man came to them, like he had all the time in the world. Stephanie came closer to her Brother’s side, who, was very close to Skulduggery. He looked at his Sister and gave her a calming smile. She didn’t return it.

“Mr. Pleasant, Mr. Bespoke..”, greeted the man as he reached them.

“Mr. Bliss”, they greeted back.

Stephanie inspected the man. He radiated out power. His pale blue eyes looked at her and M/n seemed to stiffen up slightly. Then his eyes went to M/n.

“And you two must be the siblings, which all the people are suddenly interested in.”

Stephanie couldn’t make a sound. She didn’t know, what she should have said, but she knew, her voice would have sounded high and thin, if she would have tried to speak. This Mr. Bliss had something on him, that awakened in her the wish, to get very small and cry.

M/n felt her unease and stepped in between her and Bliss, shielding her from him.

“Hey, whatever you are doing, stop it, yeah ? My Sister is at unease and that is not funny. If you use some stupid spell like this China, then stop it.”, M/n growled out slightly.

Mr. Bliss chuckled and looked at him.

“It don’t work on me, Sir.”, M/n deadpanned.

“Interesting...”

“I haven’t seen you in a while. I’ve heard, you have withdrawn from business.”, Skulduggery said, distracting all three of them.

M/n hated Mr. Bliss’ eyes. They seemed as empty as a void. No emotion left in them. He looked at Skulduggery.

“The Elders asked me to come back. We live in a time, full of restlessness.”

“Really ?”, Ghastly asked.

“The two men, that were watching Serpine, were reported missing two days ago. He is up to something, that the Elders aren’t supposed to know of.”

Skulduggery thought about that.

“Why didn’t Meritorius tell me anything ?”

“The truce is a card house, Mr. Pleasant. One little disruption, and everything falls into itself. And you are well known to make disruptions. The Elders hoped, that my interference would be enough of a scare, but I fear, they underestimated Serpine’s determination. They refuse to believe, that someone else could benefit from another war. And of course,, do they still believe, the Sceptre of Ancients, as a Fairytale.”

M/n looked at Bliss in confusion and wonder.

“So, you think the Scepter is real too ?”, he asked.

He looked at M/n.

“Oh, I know that it exists. If it can do all the things, that were told in the Legends, I don’t know, but as an object does the Sceptre very well exist. It was discovered in the youngest past, by archaeological excavations. As much as I know, did Gordon Edgley pay a high amount of cash, to get it into his possession, because it was a part of his researches for a book about the Faceless Ones. I think, he was determined to prove its sincerity, and after he succeeded, did he realize, that he can’t keep it, nor give it away. Gordon Edgley was with all his mistakes a good man, and if he had to assume, that the Sceptre had the destructible abilities, from which we’ve heard of, he surely had the feeling, that no one should own it, because it was too powerful.”

Stephanie found her voice now.

“Do you know, what he did with it ?”, she asked.

“No.”

“But you believe that Serpine is ready, to risk another war ?”, Skulduggery asked.

Mr. Bliss nodded.

“I think, in his eyes the truce did serve its purpose, yes. I can only imagine, that he waited for this moment for a while now, to seize the power, to uncover all secrets and get the Faceless Ones back here.”

“YOU believe in the Faceless Ones ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Oh yes. I grew up with that knowledge and I kept my belief in them since. Some of us just abandon the Stories, which are told about the Faceless Ones, others see them as educating fables and again others see them as bedtime stories for children. But I believe in them. I believe, that we were ruled by other entities once, which were so unbelievably evil, that even their shadows fled from them. And I believe, that they waited very long for their return, so they can punish our infraction.”

Skulduggery crooked his head.

“The Elders would listen to you.”

“You have to play by their rules. I found out, what I could, and gave all my knowledge to the only person, that knows, what to do with it. Everything else is up to you.”, Bliss replied.

“With you on our side, everything would be way easier.”, said Ghastly.

A small smile ran over Bliss’ face.

“When I have to step in, I will.”, he replied.

Without a ‘Good day’ he turned around and left. They stayed rooted there for a while until Stephanie spoke.

“He somehow was scary.”

“That’s what happens, when you barely smile. Mr. Bliss is, purely physically speaking, the strongest man on this planet. His strength tops everything.”

“So he is actually really scary ?”, she asked.

“Oh yes, very.”, Skulduggery confirmed.

They went to their cars.

“What do you think ?”, she asked Ghastly and Skulduggery as they arrived at the cars.

Skulduggery shrugged his shoulders, while Ghastly looked in deep thought.

“A lot of smart things.”, the Skeleton answered.

“Do you also think, the Sceptre is real ?”

“It seems so.”, Skulduggery said.

“If Mr. Bliss said it exists and that it was recently found too, then I do believe him. Bliss wouldn’t lie about that.”, Ghastly replied.

“So we have to get going and take a look at your collectibles now, right ?”, M/n asked.

Ghastly nodded.

“Why ?”, Stephanie asked her Brother.

M/n turned to her.

“Get your phone out and call me. We will drive to wherever Ghastly’s collectibles are and I will explain.”

She nodded and they got in. Then his Sister called him and he accepted, then turned on the speaker.

“Turn on the speaker.”

“Already done.”

“Okay, Skul, you drive first, so I just have to follow. Now listen, Sister. As this Bliss guy said, the Elders deny that there is anything wrong. They are too scared to do anything from assumptions and accusations only. They want evidence. We know now that Uncle G had the Sceptre last and that was most definitely the reason he was murdered. We need proof that it exists, so we need to find it and get our hands on it first, for that we need to find the key, which we still don’t know its location of. Last, but not least, we have to destroy it. We have to make the Sceptre nonexistent, and for that to happen, we need to go to Ghastly’s family’s collectibles, look through everything and try and find answers. There must be something that can tell us how to destroy it.”, M/n explained while they drove on the road.

“Okay...why do I have a feeling you are keeping something from me ?”, she asked suspiciously.

“Because I am thinking. Bliss said that two spies, which were on Serpine’s ass, went missing two days ago, just like that. I think I have to pay a visit to my workplace and ask my Boss about recently found corpses. I want to find out, if they accidently came into our hands. I will also have to re – inspect Uncle G’s body. I want to make sure that he was murdered and if yes, what I have to look for and if I can draw the same murderer to all three corpses, if the spies are there. That counts as evidence too, doesn’t it ? But I will need other people as my Team. I can’t work with my old Team on that. If they see anything suspicious, they will report it and I can’t make up so many lies that I will lose sight of my own truths.”

“But wasn’t Uncle embalmed ? That means everything is out, right ? Blood and everything.”, his Sister asked.

“Sis, I forbid them to do that, for this exact reason. The blood and everything is still there, which also means I will have to work with the stench the body will emit, but I have no other choice and it wouldn’t be my first time dealing with that either. Trust me, I know what I am doing.”

“God, Uncle hopefully won’t haunt you as a ghost.”

M/n sighed heavily.

“Like I said, if he decides to curse me, for disturbing him, so be it. I HAVE to figure this out.”

“Do you really think you have to do that, Corrupted ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“Yes, I do. We need all the evidence we can get, to wake those old people up from slumber land, so let me do, what I can. I didn’t study Autopsy for nothing.”

“Very well then.”, Skulduggery gave in.

Then there was a short moment of silence.

“How many people do you need ?”, Skulduggery asked M/n.

“At least three. Why ?”, M/n asked.

“I have someone in mind...”

“Who ?”

“Kenspeckle Grouse. He is a doctor and very smart. He might be able to help you. I would like to join too.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Maybe I should join too then.”, Ghastly mixed in.

“If you all go there, then I will too.”, Stephanie said.

“Sister, you won’t come along. You are twelve years old, for fucks sake. You don’t want to see cut open bodies and how I take out organs and run tests on everything. God, Mom would KILL me if she finds out that I let you even WATCH a series about such things ! You would get nightmares. Forget it.”

“I want to come along, if you won’t let me, I will tell Mom your actual job !”, Stephanie threatened.

M/n froze at that and glared at the road.

“IF you come along, you WILL listen to me, understand ? You disobey me and I will ground you for a long while. You got that ?”, he said darkly.

“Yep !”, she chirped.

“Good.”

“But how are Skulduggery and Ghastly going to hide their faces ?”, she asked.

“Let that be my worry. I have an idea.”, M/n replied with a smile.

Then he hung up and they continued to drive.

“What have you planned ?”, Ghastly asked.

M/n smiled.

“I never tested them on Mages before, so don’t expect it to work without flaws. Maybe I need to adjust a few things, but...I made something that project illusions over your body. The device is small and has a good battery. It can stay alive for over 12 hours, before you have to charge it again. I am unsure of what to call them yet. Maybe ‘cover up devices’ or something. You’ll love them, if they work.”

“Alright...but they won’t explode, right ?”

“They won’t.”, M/n replied, laughing.

“Then I am willing to try them out.”

“Good. Oh ! And please don’t tell my Sister that I am tinkering on stuff like this. It is bad enough that she knows that I am a Coroner. She doesn’t need to know that I am crafting stuff too...”, M/n muttered.

“Because she will blackmail you ?”

“Yep, one of the many things. The other would be her constantly asking me, to make her something she can gloat about... No thank you. As much as I love her, she can’t always expect ME to do everything.”

“Tough love, eh ?”, Ghastly asked with a chuckle.

M/n chuckled too.

“Very tough love.”, he confirmed jokingly.

“What else can you do ? You studied Autopsy, what else ?”, Ghastly asked.

“You will keep it a secret from everyone ?”, M/n asked back.

“Sure will. Now spill the tea.”

M/n chuckled.

“Officially I had three scholarships. One was Autopsy, the other was Mechanic and the last one was Robotics. I wanted to test myself, I suppose. I did all three of them at once and Uncle Gordon supported me. He was the ONLY one who knew. He arranged everything and all my scholarships were scheduled in one day. After I came home late at evening, I studied all three things at once, let Gordon test me and then I got, if I was lucky, at least two hours of sleep. I never really felt stressed or tired, even though I should have. At weekends I studied hard and slept longer, catching up on my sleep, but still, it should have been terrible, yet, it was entirely relaxing to me.”

Ghastly looked at M/n in awe.

���Wow, respect, Corrupted.”, Ghastly complimented.

M/n chuckled.

“What else did you do ? You said these three were ‘Official’. Was there anything that was unofficial ?”

“I mean, my driving license was. I learned sewing a bit too. I learned first aid and how to help in absolute emergencies, like, someone is bleeding out, I know how to slow it down properly. I studied a bit of medicine, I studied chemicals and liquids. I studied a lot in books, used rarely the Internet, and put my knowledge to tests. All of this, Gordon was aware of. He got me the books, he explained things I didn’t fully understand and he helped in a few things. Heck, he even taught me how to fight, stuffed me into boxing classes and another fighting sport, so I can defend myself. I guess, I learned a little bit of everything at this point. Even how to cook and clean properly.”, M/n explained, shrugging his shoulders.

To him it was no big deal, it never stressed him out. He could be put under immense pressure and he wouldn’t feel stressed. Ghastly though, was in utter shock and concern.

“Don’t you think, your Family made you do too much ?”, the tailor asked.

“Not really. Why ?”

“Well, most kids, like you, enjoy their free time a lot and don’t cope well under pressure and tasks all day.”

“Ghastly, I grew up way faster than other kids. And while it is true, that I rarely had free time, I was always asked if I was okay with everything they wanted me to do. I could have denied any time, but refused to. It’s not like they forced me. I always want to put myself under immense pressure, learn more and more interesting things and I want to find out where my limit is. Until now, I haven’t found it.”

Ghastly looked at M/n in worry, but didn’t want to poke around any further. He knew Gordon Edgley and he knew that he would never have put a child under immense pressure, if the child wouldn’t have asked for it.

Soon enough they arrived and M/n parked his car next to Skulduggery’s. They got out and M/n raised an eyebrow.

“It is hidden in the Museum ?”

“Yes, it is.”, Ghastly replied.

“How clever.”, M/n said dryly.

The two men chuckled, while the siblings were not that amused. Then Ghastly led them inside, with Skulduggery. They paid for it and then Ghastly led them away to a certain door. It was opened by Skulduggery and Ghastly entered first, then M/n and Stephanie.

Ghastly let a flame appear in his hand and together they all went down the stairs. Stephanie started to shiver, which M/n noticed. He put his left hand on her back and rubbed it. She looked at him and smiled a thankful smile.

Soon they entered a hallway, with heavy doors on both sides and they continued to walk, until they reached a door with a shield and a bear on it. Ghastly stood there and searched around in his pockets, after he found, what he was looking for, he fumbled around on the door. Soon it made a soft click and the door opened.

“Come on in.”, Ghastly said.

The three of them entered and Ghastly entered lastly. Skulduggery clicked his fingers and suddenly candles were burning on the walls in the chamber.

“Does all of this have something to do with the Sceptre ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n looked around with wide eyes of awe. The chamber was filled with high stapled, heavy, thick books, artifacts, statues, paintings and wood carvings. He even spotted an armor of a knight on one of the walls, it was leaning on it.

“It all has something to do with the Ancients.”, Skulduggery told Stephanie.

Ghastly only nodded.

“That’s why there has to be something about the Sceptre too. That the chamber was so full, I didn’t expect though.”, Skulduggery added.

M/n snorted, while Ghastly gave Skulduggery a triumphant smirk.

“I had a very studious Family.”, Ghastly said jokingly.

“Won’t anyone hear us down here ?”, Stephanie asked worried.

“No one will. These Chambers are sealed. The sound seal is one of them. The other one is a very complex lock.”, Ghastly answered her.

“In other words, you could even scream bloody murder and no one would hear us.”, M/n deadpanned to his Sister.

“Oh, I knew that !”, she yelled at her Brother.

“You didn’t. You were confused as fuck, what a sound seal was. Even I could see it. And it’s fine, not many know what that is, I mean-”, he got interrupted.

“Well, sorry that I am not as fucking smart as you, asshole !”, she yelled slightly angry.

M/n looked taken aback at that. Ghastly and Skulduggery looked at them and Ghastly seemed worried. M/n’s shock and hurt only flashed for a second in his eyes, then he seemed cold and unbothered again, yet all three of them saw the short show of emotion. Stephanie covered her mouth in shock and regret.

“M...M/n, I’m sorry... I didn’t mean it. You know I didn’t, right ?”, she asked softly, reaching out to touch his arm.

He jerked it away and took a few steps away from her. He looked at the floor.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”, he muttered and pulled his hood up.

He hid his face under it and then turned away from her.

“It’s not ! I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I know you just want me to understand things properly. You just wanted to help.”

“I said it’s fine ! Leave me alone !”, he said violently.

She shut up and took a step back from him. She hurt him badly with her insult. She never snapped at him before, she knew how sensitive he was to insults from Family. God, Stephanie wished she could wash her mouth out with soap right now.

“Let’s start looking around. The faster we are done, the faster we can get back to my home, figure out if the corpses are there, inspect them and then I can mind my own business.”, M/n said with a very soured mood.

Ghastly was worried for him. That was a low blow from his Sister and it hit him right in the heart.

M/n was silent the whole time, they have been down there. They discussed a painting and solved a little puzzle box, in which M/n was very interested in, but as soon as he saw his Sister looking, he looked away and ignored them. In the Puzzle box was an echo stone. Skulduggery activated it and there appeared an older man, they asked him questions, while he also talked a lot about other things.

He answered them their questions. Who made the Sceptre, who made the Crystal in it, if the Sceptre can be destroyed, if the crystal can be destroyed and where it may be now. As he said that if Gordon was a wise man, he would have brought it back to where he found it, or placed it to someplace similar to it, in Skulduggery’s head went up a light bulb and he knew where it was.

The Echo stone then lost all powers and the man, called Oisin, disappeared again. Ghastly was in shock. So the Sceptre really existed and Gordon really had it last.

They left the Vault and then the Museum. M/n just jumped into his car, turned on the engine and waited for Ghastly to get his ass inside the car. He was not bothering to talk with his Sister.

“I think you hit a very sensitive spot.”, Ghastly muttered to Stephanie.

She lowered her head.

“I know that I did so. He...Corrupted doesn’t care if someone calls him bad names outside of Family and friend circles, but if it was someone from inside that...if it was used as an actual insult, he gets really hurt. I was just...I HATE that he is so smart and I am so stupid. He has to explain the simplest things to me, yet...he never gets irritated to do so. I just...I was angry with myself that I can’t catch up as fast as he can and understand everything as well as he does. I snapped and accidently let it out on him...”, she muttered.

“He will be silent with you for a while, if I remember what Gordon told me about him.”, Skulduggery said softly.

“He will be. I might be ignored for a few days...”, she admitted in guilt.

“We’ll see about that. Maybe I can get him to listen to me and then we will see. He likes talking to me.”, Ghastly said with a small smile.

She looked at the tailor.

“You can try your best...”, she muttered and then got into the Bentley.

“See you at Gordon’s.”, Ghastly told Skulduggery.

The Skeleton nodded and then jumped into his car. Ghastly got into M/n’s Firebird and softly closed the door, then put on the seatbelt.

“Are you okay, Corrupted ?”, Ghastly asked calmly, as M/n started to drive.

“Just dandy.”, he said with a sour mood.

“Be honest with me, please.”

“She didn’t mean to. It happens, I also snap like that sometimes. I just need time to sort my emotions out. I’m fine, Ghastly.”, M/n insisted.

“Are they a rollercoaster right now ?”

“They are. I am sad, hurt, angry, and all I want to do, is hide away, right now. I need a bit time and then I am back to normal, no worries.”

Ghastly looked at him with concern and then looked at the radio.

“May I turn on the radio ?”, he asked.

“You won’t like the music. I have a disc inside with my own music. I don’t like the news, nor the music from there. They interrupt it always way before it is done playing.”, M/n answered.

“I think I won’t hate it.”, Ghastly assured.

“Do what you want, I don’t mind.”, M/n said, shrugging his shoulders.

Ghastly turned on the radio and almost instantly did a song play, Ghastly wasn’t familiar with. M/n knew it though.

“NCS and the song is called Ricochet.”, he said.

“NCS ?”

“No Copyrighted Sounds. They make Music that are not copyrighted, helps YouTube content creators to use it as background music or even memes, without getting in trouble.”, M/n shortly explained.

“Huh. But it ain’t bad. I thought you were into heavy Metal.”

“Hah, those times are over. I was into that as I was nine to eleven years of age.”, M/n said with a small smile. Ghastly smiled. At least M/n wasn’t all too soured anymore.

#skulduggery pleasant #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley #Part 9 – The Vault #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Mention of murder, slightly insecure Reader, cursing, mention of name calling AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 5 – Tailor Bespoke

M/n paid for the repairs and drove home a few hours ago. His Mom called him, a bit angered, that he left Stephanie all alone in the house, until M/n explained that he had to pick up is car from repairs, and that it could have taken him hours, if he wouldn’t have left. That was enough reason for Melissa to stop and apologize to him.

She didn’t know that he had vacation from his work already. He always kept that a secret. He never said anything when he had vacation from his work, because then he worked on other things.

Soon enough, a bit into Midday, Stephanie wrote M/n, while he was in his secret little workshop, that his Uncle Gordon made for him in Grimwood, that she and Skulduggery were coming to pick him up.

M/n: Okay, but be careful and tell him to use the door, like any normal one, this time. I bought a new hinge and set the door back in. I left a key under the welcome mat. Just take it and unlock it. I am in my study, doing some research about something. I will come out as soon as I am finished.

Sassy Sissy: Okay, noted.

With that M/n put away his phone and then continued to tinker in his secret workshop. After a few minutes he heard the door being unlocked and M/n rushed to his study, changed his clothes, took his own car and house keys and then he came out of his study.

He went down the stairs and into the living room, seeing Skulduggery and Stephanie.

“Hey, Steph.”, M/n greeted.

“Hi. You have to stand in front of a full body mirror.”, she said.

“Huh ?”, M/n asked confused.

“Skulduggery pretty much used a spell to make me have a reflection of myself, that will replace me, while I am gone and with him. When I return it goes back into the mirror, I touch it and all its memories get transferred to me. It will act like you and take your place, while you have other things to do.”, she explained.

“Ah...Okay....”

M/n then went to Gordon’s old study and they followed. Skulduggery drew with chalk on it, said a few words and then told M/n to wipe it off and touch the mirror. He did so and jumped back as his reflection stepped out of it.

“Oh fuck me...”, M/n wheezed in shock.

Stephanie snorted.

“What is it ?”, she asked.

M/n pointed at the reflection.

“It looks fucking ugly ! I know for a fact that MY hair isn’t that ugly !”

She frowned and looked at him.

“What do you see ?”, Skulduggery asked worried.

“I see some dark aura around it and it doesn’t look ANYTHING like me !”

“Ah...”

She turned to the Detective.

“What is ‘Ah’ ?”

“He can’t be fooled by reflections. He can see through their façade. Don’t worry, M/n, it looks just like you. You can see through its façade.”

“So he can do magic ?”, Stephanie asked.

“A little bit. He can tell what is a reflection and what is a real person.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Huh...okay then.”, M/n replied hesitantly.

“What do you expect me to do ?”, the reflection of him asked.

“Don’t answer the house phone, besides it is a certain number. And don’t leave the house. Don’t touch my stuff either.”

“Understood.”, it replied.

“Good. Now...can I use my own car to follow ? I don’t want to be in the Bentley again.”, he pouted.

“Believe me, you really don’t want to. He came and picked me up with it, damaged. He said he got ambushed in his car. Everyone stared !”

M/n laughed his ass off at that.

“Okay ! We are taking MY car then and I will look at the Bentley, see what I can fix.”, M/n said with a smile.

“Hah ?! You can fix cars ?!”, Stephanie yelled in shock.

“Well...most of it I can. I am still working on getting parts for certain areas, so I can fix my own car, in the future, myself.”

“You could have fixed Mom’s car ?!”

“No. She said the engine didn’t work and I don’t have any replacement parts for it. Also, she is not allowed to ever know, that I studied for other, more dangerous, things, than marketing.”, M/n replied to his little sister, as they went to his garage.

“And who agreed that we are leaving MY Bentley here ?”, Skulduggery protested.

“Me and Steph, which means that you are outnumbered. I am not going to drive inside a damaged, suffering car, nor will I drive after it. We are taking my Pontiac Firebird. Suck it up, loser.”, M/n said.

Then they entered the garage and Skulduggery stopped still as he saw the Pontiac Firebird.

“Wow. It looks beautiful and very well taken care of.”, Skulduggery said and caressed the cowling.

(Design)

“Who told you, you can touch it ?”, M/n scolded and smacked his gloved hand off of his car, playfully.

Skulduggery chuckled and pulled it away. Just then he saw that M/n wore a black jacket over his other clothes, with a hood on the back of it.

“Now hop in losers. Sis, you are allowed to sit in the passenger seat. But on the way back you have to switch.”

She pouted.

“Fine...”

“Can I have the keys then ?”, Skulduggery asked, stretching his hand out.

“Who said YOU can drive MY car ? NEVER. You will navigate me. My car, my rules.”

Skulduggery was stunned at that.

“Wouldn’t it make more sense to let me sit in the front then ?”, he asked M/n.

“Ask my Sister, for permission, not me. She always calls dibs on the front.”, M/n replied, shrugging his shoulders.

The Detective looked at her, with his sunglasses. She grinned mockingly.

“Now...I just want to know some things.”, she started.

“Oh dear...”, Skulduggery sighed.

“When did you two plan to tell me that Gordon was murdered ?”, Stephanie asked the two males darkly.

M/n froze up at that and he looked at her with wide eyes, while Skulduggery tensed up.

“Oh, you found out ?”, M/n asked nervously.

“Yes. And I know that you knew the instant, it was mentioned, that, he had to die for something, someone wanted. Why didn’t you tell me ?”

“Because I am a Coroner and usually I am not allowed to talk about it to anyone, not even family relatives. It is beat into my system. Sorry, little Sis.”, M/n apologized.

“Fine, you are forgiven. And why did YOU not tell me ?”, she asked Skulduggery.

“This is a very dangerous thing. This is a very dangerous world, I live in.”, Skulduggery explained.

The two siblings stared and M/n cursed under his breath, annoyed.

“Listen here, numbskull, we don’t give a flying fuck. We can handle it, we proved that much to you yesterday. This is OUR Uncle, who got murdered. Not just YOUR friend, but OUR Uncle ! This is FAMILY and whoever killed him, found it funny to do so. This is OUR business, now, just as much as it is yours. Family sticks together and you DON’T EVER mess with Family. You mess with one member, you have the whole Family on your ass next.”, M/n started, annoyed.

Skulduggery wanted to open his jaw, but M/n beat him to it.

“To make matters even worse, that person sent some Psycho to my home and was even ready to kill US, which means that we got involved in the most serious way already. We are NOT backing out now. This is a Family matter and I will turn deaf ears on anything else you will try to tell us. Now get in the fucking car and let’s go.”

“Can I at least say something ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“Make it quick. I am annoyed and my mood is soured. Doesn’t help that I didn’t sleep.”

“I only didn’t want you too deep in this, because Gordon was my friend and I felt like I owed him, to not pull his favorite Nephew and Niece into the Danger zone.”, Skulduggery explained.

“We are already inside it. Thanks to someone who was ready to murder us.”, Stephanie told him.

“The decision is not yours, anymore, to make.”, M/n added, voice tired.

“As it seems.”, Skulduggery agreed.

“So, you won’t keep any secrets, from us, in the future ?”, M/n’s sister asked.

“Cross my heart and hope to die. I swear by my life.”, Skulduggery said as he put his hand over his dressed ribcage.

“Okay.”, she replied.

“Great.”, M/n answered.

“Even though you don’t have a heart anymore.”, she said.

“I know.”, Skulduggery replied dryly.

“And technically you also don’t have a life anymore.”, M/n added.

“I know that too.”

“Then we understand each other.”, the siblings replied, satisfied.

“Get in the front seat, Loser. But I will sit in the front, on the way back home.”, Stephanie said.

“Understood.”, Skulduggery answered and got in by the passenger seat.

M/n jumped into the driver’s seat and Stephanie into the back, then M/n started the engine, the garage opened and he drove out. Before they sped off, he halted next to the Bentley.

“Get your car into the garage.”, M/n said.

Skulduggery did as he was told and then they drove off, Skulduggery navigating M/n, where to drive to.

After they were on a very long and straight road, Stephanie asked him stuff.

“What’s he like ?”

“What’s who like ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“The guy we are going to meet. What’s even his name ?”, she asked.

“Ghastly Bespoke.”, the Detective answered.

M/n choked on his own spit and tried not to laugh, thinking it was a joke. Stephanie stared at Skulduggery, trying to see that he was joking, but he wasn’t and when M/n realized he was serious, too, he was shocked.

“Wait, you were serious ? Why would anyone call themselves ‘Ghastly’ ?”, M/n asked in surprise.

“Different names fit the most different people. Ghastly is my tailor and at the same time one of my best friends. He taught me how to box.”

“And what’s he like ?”

“Proper. Honorable. Honest. And most definitely funnier, as it sounds right now. Also he is not a very big Fan of Sorcery.”

“He doesn’t like Sorcery ? Why ?”, Stephanie asked confused.

“It just doesn’t interest him.”, Skulduggery said and looked at M/n.

He seemed to have a face of understanding.

“He probably grew up with Magic and it just...became his normal life. It is not uncommon, to wish for another life and another world, when you grew up in one that is, to many, unusual and to you normal. But honestly...he should be thankful, that he is a Mage instead of a Mortal... I could give him a hundred reasons as to why he should be happy about it.”, M/n admitted.

“Why would he not be interested in Magic ? It can’t only be, because he grew up with it.”, Stephanie asked.

“The world, he reads about in books and that he sees in TV, he likes more, the world with Policemen and Robbers and human dramas and sport. If he could have decided, where he wanted to live, he would have chosen the world without Magic. Then he could have gone to school and learned a job and...he could have been normal. But he never had that Chance, of course. And he might never get one either.”

“Why not ?”, the siblings asked.

Stephanie was confused, while M/n was concerned.

Skulduggery hesitated, as if he thought about, how he should tell them this the best way, then he explained, that Ghastly was hideous since he was a Baby. M/n grew concerned and slightly defensive for the poor man, who wasn’t even present. Was the tailor alright with Skulduggery talking about him like this ?

“Not just ugly”, he said, “not just unflattering looking, but really and truly hideous. His Mother was cursed, as she was pregnant with him, and now his whole face is covered in scars. They tried everything, to undo it – counter spells, miracle cures, incantations, magical formulas, but nothing helped.”

M/n scoffed at Skulduggery and his stare, on the road, turned into a glare.

“Are you fucking serious, Pleasant ?! I thought worse, since you overreacted like this, about Ghastly ! Just some silly scars ?! That’s all ?! God damn ! You made it sound worse than it is ! I thought he was born with half of his face missing, or half rotten meat and the other was normal ! Holy shit, man ! From now on stop exaggerating everything !”, M/n yelled at him in the car.

Skulduggery was a bit taken aback at that information. Stephanie was surprised that M/n had such horrible images in his head, but then again, he was a Coroner. He must have seen stuff like that already.

After that Skulduggery explained that Ghastly always switched the roles of his parents’ jobs, to his class comrades. That he had his love for boxing from his Father and his love for sewing from his Mother. Even though it was the other way around.

He talked more and more about him and at that M/n could see that he was actually friends with the tailor and that he cared about him dearly. He was even glad that he chose clothes making, over boxing, because he made awesome suits.

Stephanie asked him if they were just going there for him to get a new suit, which he replied to with a no. His Family had a lot of historical things, art pieces and literature about the Ancients and the Sceptre. He wanted to talk to him, so they can get his permission to take a look at everything and find out how to protect themselves from it, what there was to know about the Scepter and the Ancients and more.

“I thought you don’t believe in it.”, M/n mocked.

“It doesn’t hurt to do some research about it either.”, Skulduggery only replied.

Then they arrived inside a small town and after a bit, Skulduggery made M/n stop the car.

“We are here.”, he told the siblings.

They got out, M/n locked up his car and then they followed Skulduggery to a certain building.

All the buildings looked terrible and the people hurried past them, without paying them much attention. An elderly Lady nodded at Skulduggery, as she walked past him.

“Is this one of these secret communities, you talked about ?”, Stephanie asked.

“That’s right. We tried, to make the environment as little welcoming as possible. So no one has the urge to snoop around.”

“In that you definitely succeeded.”, she muttered.

“Not really. These buildings look shabby to you, but there are people that love to spray graffiti on the walls, taint it all and then break into houses. It was a dumb idea. No matter what you do, there are always Humans that will do the exact opposite of what you tried to achieve.”, M/n countered.

“From where would you know that ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Little Sister, I had my rebel years as I was 12 years old and the behavior lasted until I was almost 14 years old. I sprayed Graffiti on buildings and walls, I disgraced ugly nowadays cars, I broke into houses, I entered buildings that were close to collapsing, I invaded property, just to steal fruit and vegetables from their backyards...I did a lot of shit a few years ago. The more dangerous it was, the more I wanted to do it. It just gave me the adrenaline I needed from time to time, to feel SOMETHING. It was wrong, but I still did it.”, M/n deadpanned.

“Did Uncle G know ?”, she asked.

“He did. He tried to stop me and at some point he threatened me that he will turn me in by his friend, for a few weeks. To teach me a lesson. I think he meant Skulduggery with that. I got out of my rebel years after I almost got Uncle G in deep trouble. I have no idea how he got out of them, but let’s just say...it gave me a huge scare.”

She stared at her Brother in shock. He chuckled.

“What ? I know I was bad, but you never saw anything, so I wasn’t a bad influence.”

“You are so sweet and caring ! How did I miss that ?!”, she yelled.

M/n laughed and ruffled her hair.

“You missed it, because I hid it well.”, he said.

“That is so NOT fair !”, she complained.

M/n shook his head.

“So, rule number one, don’t judge the outside of the buildings. They are supposed to look like crap. That doesn’t mean that the inside is just as crap. Noted.”, M/n said.

“Very good.”, Skulduggery praised.

Then he started to pull Stephanie’s leg about Octopus humans, which M/n found utterly ridiculous. He laughed as Skulduggery told her that they don’t exist, that would be a nightmare to deal with, which she only glared at the Skeleton.

Before they knew it, they entered through a door and it was warm, smelled nice and it looked cozy. M/n was already feeling like home in there. He thought that the puppets, that stood there, for a second, will act like security, but they stayed puppets and did what puppets did.

Then a man with his face covered in scars, come out from the back room. Ghastly Bespoke. M/n was in awe at all the scars. After two seconds, he looked away, not wanting to seem disrespectful. He smiled at them and shook Skulduggery’s hand, welcomingly. He had broad shoulders too. M/n looked at his Sister, who intensely stared at Ghastly, so he smacked her over the back of her head.

“Ow !”, she yelled and glared at M/n.

“Take a picture, it will last longer. Staring at people is rude.”, M/n scolded.

“I’m used to it.”, Ghastly replied.

M/n looked at the tailor.

“It doesn’t make it right.”, he argued back and then glared at his Sister again.

Ghastly still smiled and looked at Stephanie. M/n felt slightly protective, but for now he suppressed the urge to jump into action. He was nice until now. Stay...calm...

“Do you want to shake my hand or do you want to start with something easier, like wave ?”, the tailor asked, with no malice in his voice.

She suddenly blushed from embarrassment and stretched out her hand quickly. It almost made M/n laugh. He grinned and tried badly to hide his snort with his hand. He never saw her, this shy before. It was so funny.

His hand had no scars. So it was really just the face and head. Poor guy.

“Do you have a name ?”, he asked her.

“Not yet.”, she replied softly.

“Think very carefully, if you really want to have one, before you continue to think about it. This life is not for everyone.”

She nodded slowly. Then he looked at M/n and he stretched his hand out to him. M/n took it and he felt how strong his hand was and how firm his hold was on his hand.

“How about you, hm ?”, Ghastly asked kindly.

“Well, I do have, what you call, a Taken name, but it wasn’t originally for the world of Mages. My Uncle thought it best to use a Taken name, for the work I am doing.”

“May I know your name then ?”, he asked.

“It’s Corrupted. I am still working on the last name...”, M/n answered.

He nodded.

“Nice to meet you, Corrupted.”

“Nice to meet you too, Mr. Bespoke. Skulduggery talked a lot about you while I drove US here.”, M/n said mocking Skulduggery playfully.

Skulduggery muttered under his breath. Ghastly raised an eyebrow at that, his smile turning into a teasing grin.

“Is that so ?”

“You should ask your best friend. By the way, you should punch him in the jaw as hard as you can. He exaggerated about your condition, if you know what I mean. He made me believe that you lost half of your face or something, while you just have scars. He is an asshat.”, M/n snitched on Skulduggery.

Ghastly laughed.

“That bad ?”, he asked M/n and stepped away.

“ ‘He is very hideous. Was born like that as a baby and it was a curse.’ Like...when I hear hideous, I think about crippled people, people that lost their faces or worse. And then he dropped the secret why you are apparently hideous...it was scars... I was ready to punch him, but I was driving, so I just yelled at him.”

Ghastly looked at Skulduggery, who lifted his arms up in the air.

“Now, now, Ghastly ! We can talk about this !”, Skulduggery said.

Not a second later, did the tailor box Skulduggery in the shoulder.

“Ow...”, the Detective said.

“That’s what you get for scaring them so much. Dramatic Skeleton.”

“That’s fair, I suppose.”

Then Ghastly inspected both the siblings and looked at his friend again.

“Where there any problems ?”, he asked.

“A few.”, answered Skulduggery.

“Then I suppose it is time for the right garments.”, the tailor said and got out a small pad, from his pocket, taking notes.

He looked at Stephanie.

“Do you have any favorite colors ?”, he asked her, while he started to write in his pad.

“Pardon ?”, she asked.

M/n face palmed.

“Your clothes. Any preferences ?”

“I don’t really understand...”

“Not all clothes, I am making, are just examples of exquisite tailoring. Occasionally, if the situation demands of it, there have to be special needs taken into account.”

M/n nodded with wide eyes of understanding.

“Ah ! I get where this is going !”, he said happily.

“Ghastly is planning to make you clothes, that will protect you, until this whole thing is over and done with.”, Skulduggery explained, “Ghastly can make you a suit, nothing formal, that can save your life.”

“Fashion.”, Ghastly said, shrugging his shoulders.

“This is about life and death.”, he added after a short silence.

His pencil flew over the paper.

“So now again: Do you have a favorite color for your clothes ?”

“I...I don’t know, if we can afford it...”, she said softly.

Ghastly shrugged his shoulders.

“I’ll put it on Skulduggery’s bill. Go crazy.”

M/n smirked and chuckled.

“I like him.”, he said and looked at his Sister.

She only blinked. She wasn’t prepared for this. She only went shopping with her Mom and Brother before.

“I don’t really know...black ?”

Ghastly nodded and wrote something into his notebook.

“With black you can’t go wrong.”, he said.

“Black and white are THE fashion colors. Almost every color suits them.”, M/n agreed.

Ghastly smiled and looked at him, nodding.

“Exactly.”, he confirmed.

Then he looked at him and started to draw into his notebook again.

“What about you ? Any favorite color ?”

“Oof...My good man...you are asking too much of me.”, M/n chuckled.

“He almost loves every color.”, Stephanie joked.

He glared at her.

“Do NOT ! But I can never decide.”

“Name some.”, Ghastly offered.

“Okay...Sapphire blue, night black, cyan, ruby red, blood red, forest green, emerald green, gold, silver, amethyst purple, dark blue, Zaffre, Smalt and Vantablack. I guess, surprise me. I have no idea what would look best on me with clothes in these colors.”

“I might have a few ideas already. Anything else ?”, Ghastly asked.

M/n blushed in shame.

“Was I that obvious that I wanted to ask something ?”, he asked the tailor.

Ghastly chuckled and nodded.

“Well...sometimes, clothes make me sweat, long or short sleeved doesn’t even matter, even though I am always very cold. Can you do ANYTHING about that, so I don’t have to wash my clothes every HOUR ? It tends to get really bad sometimes...And nothing helps either. Deo wears off quickly and the perfume is too much and too little at the same time, no matter the brand.”, M/n asked shyly.

He seemed stressed about it, which he was. He was always cold, but still, his armpits, back and chest sweat a lot, no matter what he did, nothing helped and his scent overthrows everything, which, is supposed to hide it away. Even stuff, that is supposed to stay strong for DAYS, has no chance to cover it up for longer than two hours.

“Hmmm...I think I have a few tricks up my sleeve, to help with that.”, Ghastly replied and noted it down.

“Anything else ? What design should they be ? Suit or something more normal ?”, Ghastly asked.

“Uhmm...Let me think....I think, about any other problems, I am clear. Just the sweating issue. I am unsure, I like wearing suits from time to time, but I also like to wear long sleeved sweatshirts, normal pair of jeans and a jacket. As long as I have a hood on my jacket, I walk around with these.”

“Because you wanna feel cool.”, Stephanie muttered.

M/n looked at her, then away.

“No, it’s because sometimes, I feel insecure and wanna hide away, Sissy. Believe it or not, even smart people, like me, feel unsure of themselves, sometimes. The hood helps me to hide away, but I also have moments where I wear a suit and aren’t afraid to show off. So honestly, whatever ya think is best, Mr. Bespoke. I have no issues with anything.”

“You still hate zoning people in.”, M/n’s sister accused.

“He looks clever and creative. I want him to be creative. He can surely come up with something cool and whatever it will look like, I will like it. I never had issues with clothes. As long as they fit, I will take them.”, M/n argued back to her.

She looked at him skeptical.

“Heck, he could make a potato sack for me to wear and, as long as it would fit me, I would wear it. Clothes are clothes. I never had a certain taste in them.”

Ghastly was surprised at that and looked at his best friend, who seemed a bit saddened. The tailor was determined to make something that will fit M/n perfectly. Stephanie looked at Ghastly.

“My Brother also loves pockets. A LOT of pockets and they have to be deep. The pants and jackets, he likes, have very flat and small pockets, which, not even his phone would fit into. It would always fall out, just like his keys. He also needs belts sometimes, because the rubbers in the waistbands of his pants, tend to not do their job properly. Maybe he also needs an extra large pocket on his pants, because he will need to carry around a knife all day, thanks to his job.”, she added to the list.

M/n looked away and sighed. Why did his Sister know him so well ?

“What is he doing, that he needs to carry around a weapon ?”, Ghastly asked concerned, noting down the infos.

“He works as a Coroner for humans, but he gets ‘special’ victims recently. People, that died from things, which, came from our world. No one wants to investigate it, or seems to find it, but he does. He sent me a few things and gave me the report of someone already, to go over it. We will be working together from time to time, because of this. Better him, Gordon’s Nephew, than anyone else. He can keep this a secret, someone else, probably won’t.”, Skulduggery answered.

“But being a very successful, observant and smart Coroner, like me, draws a lot of attention to you and that is why I always have to be armed. One downside of my job, people trying to murder you and make you shut up. But I wanted to do it and Uncle supported my paths. That is also why I already have a Taken name. I work with the name ‘Corrupted’ as the Coroner, so my Family stays safe. If anyone would look up anything about me or my Given name, they would find nothing that connects us. So my Family is safe.”, M/n explained softly.

Ghastly stared at M/n in shock.

“How old are you again ?”, he asked.

“Sixteen, but I feel way older than I am, thanks to my past. I was very smart too, so I was sent from the first grade, to the tenth in less than 6 months and as I succeeded in all the difficult tests, that, I never really learned in school, but still could answer correctly, they let me graduate earlier and I was instantly in university, then I started scholarships. I raced through College, as Uncle G stated. I was too smart apparently. I started my job as Coroner with 13 years of age.”

Ghastly stared at M/n in utter shock.

“When were you taken into school ?”

“I was adopted with six years of age, by my Sister’s Family and Uncle G instantly suggested, to put, me into a school, because I seemed very smart. I read one of his books and told him that he had a lot of typos, which he never saw. When he asked me math questions, I always had the answers. He saw potential in me and that’s how I enrolled. After two months of me being, very intelligent, they tested my knowledge and made me race through all the other grades. I always came out with the mark one. In every subject. Then I was in tenth grade and I raced through it just as quick with everything. Then I had University, which I finished in a year and then I was supposed to figure out what scholarships I wanted to make. Uncle G helped me and with that I started my three years of learning. After I was finished I started to write applications to different places and nailed an apprenticeship as a Coroner. I got the job two months later.”

Ghastly was impressed and shocked.

“Gordon really wasn’t bluffing then. He talked a lot about you. I am surprised, really. I thought he made that up, to mock people that weren’t really smart.”, the tailor said sheepishly.

“It’s fine. You don’t meet someone, like me, everyday. I am...an abomination. Not normal.”

“Who called you an abomination ?”, Stephanie asked a bit angered.

“School kids, University people, scholar people and even some of my colleagues at work. I am a freak for being so smart and observant. I never leave a stone unturned. I get all of the work, because they all don’t like me very much. Only my Boss does.”

After M/n finished answering his Sister, he pulled his hood over his head, hiding away. They all felt sympathy for him. But Ghastly knew how that felt best.

“I am sorry, that you were treated like this and it goes on. I can relate.”, Ghastly said softly.

“I know you can. I am sorry for you too, that nothing worked out for you. But let us be honest, if you would have been a human and not a Mage, you would have never met some people that are either your friends now or even people you can just turn to, for help. Believe me...the Mortal realm isn’t all that great either. What you read in books and see on the TV, is not reality. The reality is way darker and depressing than what you would expect.”, M/n told Ghastly, with a soft voice.

Ghastly stared at M/n in surprise and confusion.

“It is like the books we Mortals read about Magic. It sounds awesome and all, but it is also very dangerous. We read books and watch TV shows about magical worlds and wish to be there, anywhere, but in the reality, we live in. You do the very same, just reversed. You have no clue what is really going on in our reality.”, M/n explained and then looked away.

“And you do ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Sis, I am a very intelligent kid, with a dangerous job. I help solving a lot of cases and I keep improving with my knowledge about everything. Because I am so young and very smart, I get a lot of requests to work for other people. A few times I was interested and decided to risk a small peak into what I would have to do. You don’t want to know what I’ve seen. It was scarring. I started to ignore such requests and stayed with my job instead. It...was for the better.”

Ghastly grew concerned.

“What did you see ?”, he asked.

M/n turned to him with a small smile.

“Maybe another time, if there ever will be another one. I...don’t want to talk about it.”

They decided to shut up about it. Ghastly left and went for the back room again.

“Does he not have to take measures to make our clothes ?”, Stephanie asked.

“A look is enough to him.”, Skulduggery told her.

“I suppose experience and stuff.”, M/n stated.

“Something like that.”

Skulduggery lead them through a door that was a bit further in the back, it lead to a small living room and it didn’t take long for Ghastly to arrive again. Stephanie and Skulduggery sat down on the small couch, while M/n stayed up, standing straight.

Stephanie looked at her big Brother in concern.

“Do you want to sit down and I sit on your lap ?”, she asked.

She blushed slightly in embarrassment, but she was willing to be a bit embarrassed. Her Brother could never stand for very long. He would start pacing soon enough and not stop for hours to pace. He said, he did that, because his legs otherwise started to either hurt or he wouldn’t feel his blood flow after a while. He bounced his legs a lot too, for the exact same reasons.

“You sure you want that, little Sister ?”, M/n asked.

“Yeah. I know how you get otherwise.”, she answered and got up.

M/n sighed and sat down in her spot and Stephanie sat down on her big Brother’s lap after that. He held her close and looked at Ghastly.

He sat on the armchair that stood in front of them. He had his fingertips laid on top of each other, that his hands formed an A.

“And now I would like to know, what is going on.”, Ghastly said.

Masterlist HERE !

#Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 5 – Tailor Bespoke #skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Mention of death, mention of dangerous job, cursing, inappropriate joke AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 3 – Take us with you

The rest was pretty fast and funny. The Skeleton Detective made sure that the creep was gone, tried to reattach the door, which failed marvelously and then he picked up the glass shards, asked where to throw them away to, to which Stephanie said stunned she had no idea and he suggested to bring them to the trashcan outside in the back. After that, it didn’t take long for her to try and confirm, if he was really a Skeleton and then she passed out from shock, in which he caught her and put her on the couch, pulling a blanket over her body, to keep her warm.

Then he looked at M/n, who was visibly in pain, but not in horror at what he saw. He looked pale though.

“Are you alright, M/n ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“I don’t...think so. I have nothing broken, but my back hurts immensely and my legs can barely keep my weight... I need some chocolate and painkillers...”, M/n muttered out shakily.

“Are they still in the bathroom drawer and kitchen cabinet ?”, Skulduggery asked as he pulled a chair near M/n, to let him sit down.

M/n fell on the chair, hissing and sweating from exhaustion.

“Y-yeah... Can you do me a favor and get it for me ? I...I don’t think I can walk. The pain and adrenaline is still too high for me...”, M/n asked of the Detective.

“Of course.”

With that Skulduggery left and soon enough returned with a glass of water, a bar of chocolate and a painkiller.

“Is the chocolate 75% chocolate ?”, M/n asked.

He looked at the wrapping.

“Yeah.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Good. Okay... Can you break the painkiller in half ? I am scared of big pills and need them in half, otherwise I am too scared to swallow them and to choke on them.”

Skulduggery broke the painkiller in two and M/n took the halves, the chocolate bar, which he put on his lap, and then the glass.

“Thank you.”, he said softly.

Then M/n put the first half of the pill into his mouth, took a gulp of water, threw his head back for a few seconds, then pulled it back to the front and swallowed. The, shortly head throwing back, technique helped him to get the pill to the back of his mouth and to swallow it surely, instead of it staying stuck on his tongue or teeth.

Then he took the second half and did the same. Skulduggery took the empty glass back in his hand and he brought it to the sink in the kitchen, while M/n ripped open the wrapper of the chocolate, then he munched on the whole bar. Then Skulduggery returned to them both and he crooked his head to his right.

“You seem to take this pretty well.”, Skulduggery analyzed.

M/n chuckled weakly.

“I mean, this is better than anything else. It might make me reconsider inspecting Skeletons next time at work, but at least you are a Skeleton and not a decaying, mangled corpse that came to life. You didn’t harm us either, you came to help and Uncle G always told me and Steph about Magic, like he saw it himself once. I just come to the conclusion that you are still here thanks to Magic or something. That Gordon really saw Magic...something I always wished I could have and see in reality and now that it is here, I am unsure of how to react properly.”

“I kind of understand what you mean.”

“Really ? It feels like I am talking nonsense right now...”

“That is the shock and adrenaline talking.”, Skulduggery assured.

M/n smiled and suddenly he started to breathe heavily and his eyes widened. He tried to get up, but fell back on the chair, he couldn’t move. He cursed in a wheeze. Skulduggery rushed over.

“What’s wrong ?”

“M-my study....Desk...left drawer....blue liquid...”, M/n muttered out with trouble.

Skulduggery rushed off and came back with a syringe, which held blue liquid. M/n rolled up his sleeve and Skulduggery was by his side.

“Stab...left arm....Inject...”

Skulduggery did so quickly and after a few seconds M/n could breathe normally again. Water was leaking out of his mouth and he turned away, to cough it out.

“What was that ?”, the Skeleton asked, worried.

“No worries...it happens sometimes...when I feel immensely stressed out...”

“That is water from nowhere, M/n.”

“It is a weird condition. I am glad that I found a way that will make it go away.”

Skulduggery decided to leave it at that for now. M/n seemed uncomfortable to talk about it.

“Thank you, for rushing over to aid. I should be able to move in a few minutes... I will get the reports for you then.”, M/n said softly.

“No problem. I am planning to stay until your Sister woke up.”, Skulduggery replied.

“Only until then ?”

“Yes, why ?”

“Skulduggery, the door is out of its hinges. You didn’t put it back in, not that it would let you, the fucker bend one out of shape, thanks to his brutal banging on the door, so it needs replacement immediately and the window is completely smashed in. As soon as you leave, we are in danger again. I am in NO condition to fight for at least 3 hours.”, M/n told him, worried.

“We will worry about that later.”, Skulduggery waved off.

Then he left and got from outside some wooden boards with nails, from the small shed Gordon had in the backyard. He went to board up the broken window and M/n just watched him.

“Did you tell him your names ?”, Skulduggery asked.

M/n snapped out of his thoughts and looked at him again.

“No. The only thing we said was Joe Mama. I didn’t call her name at all and she didn’t call mine either. Why ?”

“Telling a mage your given name gives them a certain extend of control over you.”, Skulduggery explained shortly.

“Ah...so the whole name stuff, Uncle talked about, was also true, huh ?”, M/n asked.

“Depends, what he told you.”

“Given name is the name your parents gave you and if a mage knows it, it gives them a certain extend of control over you. Taken name is the name that you gave yourself and a mage has no control over you, with that name. True name is the name that no one knows, not even you, yourself. If you find out what your True name is, you can get a magical power boost and even become something close to a God. If someone else finds out before you though, that mage will have complete control over you.”, M/n recalled.

Skulduggery was silent for a bit and nodded then.

“That is correct then.”

“Huh, cool. That’s why he wanted me to use a fake name at work and everything...”

“What do you mean ?”

“I work as a Coroner and I get weird murder cases that now could mean it was Magic. If Mages find that out, they would actively hunt down the person, who inspected them and figured out that something was off with the bodies. He wanted me to use a fake name way before I even started as a Coroner. My name was ‘Corrupted’ since. I just don’t have a last name yet....”

“Fair... You don’t have to have a last name.”

“I know, but I should get one anyways.”, M/n muttered.

“If you want to. Now then, I will try my luck again with the door. Maybe I can correct the one hinge for a bit.”

“Good luck, but the way it looks, it needs a full replacement.”

With that Skulduggery went to try again and even fumbled around on the ruined hinge, only to fail miserably. Then Stephanie stirred and M/n was happy that she did. He got up from his chair and took unsteady steps towards her.

“Morning, Sleeping Beauty.”, M/n teased slightly.

She sat up and looked at her Brother. Then at the boarded up window and at the Skeleton, who tried to figure out a way for the door. He turned around and then spotted her awake.

“Oh, you are awake.”, Skulduggery said.

“You fixed the window.”

“Well, I boarded it up. Gordon had some planks in the back laying around, so I did, what I could. With the door I sadly don’t have that much luck. I don’t have as much problems to get them out of their hinges, than back inside. How are you feeling ?”

“Maybe you should learn to perfect that art of yours. Knock out your own door and then put it back in.”, M/n said with an impish grin.

Stephanie smiled softly and Skulduggery chuckled.

“Maybe.”

“I’m okay, to answer your question, by the way. How are you two ?”, she asked.

“I am just fine.”, Skulduggery replied.

“Meh, my body is still recovering, but I will be fine in a few hours, don’t worry.”, M/n answered her.

“What you need right now, is a cup of hot tea with much sugar.”, Skulduggery said to Stephanie.

He let the door be door and went into the kitchen, while M/n and Stephanie followed him. She sat down on the table that stood there, while Skulduggery boiled water. M/n carefully sat down too and just then, did Stephanie notice, that M/n’s nose was running.

“You and your body are stressed. Your nose is doing the water stressing again.”, she said softly.

M/n sniffed and nodded in annoyance.

“Yeah...My body is catching up with what just happened. Getting kicked and punched and slammed with your back against the wall TWICE is not very relaxing.”

Skulduggery chuckled and Stephanie snorted.

“You have a point.”

Then she and Skulduggery talked a bit and she asked him how it was possible for him to even do the things he does. Walking, talking, moving and all that and M/n held his hand up for Skulduggery to shut up, pulled out his phone, went into YouTube and looked up a sound effect. He smirked and looked at his Sister.

“Stephanie, I have the answers for you, how he is able to do all of that.”, he said.

“How ?”

Then M/n played the sound effect.

Phone: Magic *Snort* *Snort*

M/n grinned widely and Stephanie gave him an unamused look, while Skulduggery chuckled again.

Then Skulduggery even confessed that he wasn’t even wearing his OWN skull, that he won that one in a Poker game. He lost his own skull to trolls one night and they ran away while he was still meditating. He made the tea in the meantime for Stephanie, who wanted milk and sugar in it, then he set it in front of her and she took a sip.

“Thank you.”, she thanked.

“You are welcome.”, Skulduggery replied.

“Is it weird to have another skull on your neck ? I mean, it must feel weird, right ? Like...it is out of place.”, M/n asked.

“It’s alright. It has to, until I can get my own one back. You get used to it.”, Skulduggery replied.

“Huh...”

“What happened to you ? Were you born that way ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n spat out his water and stared at his younger Sister.

“Stephanie ! That was rude !”, M/n scolded.

“It’s fine, M/n. And no, I wasn’t born this way. I was totally normal as I was born.”

“Then...what happened ?”

“I am also a bit curious, but no pressure.”, M/n added himself in.

Skulduggery leaned himself back and then started to explain to them that there was a small war under Mages going on. About Mevolent, the bad guy, and his people, how he was losing and then at a last resort went after the leaders on their side, to turn the tables around.

Turned out that Skulduggery was messing with the right hand man of Mevolent’s army, he set up a trap, he didn’t notice until it was too late and he died. After he died, he was impaled on a lance and then burned openly, to scare everyone. It worked and Mevolent got more people again. To top it all off they threw his bones into a bag and threw it into a river. Just fucking wow... So disrespectful...

M/n’s blood boiled. He HATED wars. They never ended well anyways, so why do such a silly thing ? It just harms the people, but it doesn’t do anything else. No one really lives happily after that, thanks to trauma and more aftereffects of it.

Then he explained, what happened after he was dead and also said that he never heard anything, like that, happen to anyone else before, so he was one of a kind. After he had seen enough, he somehow came back.

Then Stephanie asked if he didn’t miss anything that he had when he was alive. He replied that he missed his hair.

“Only that ? What about eating ? Like, tasting anything ? I would miss taste...”, M/n said saddened.

“I bet you would miss your dick more, M/n.”, Stephanie accused.

He looked at her offended. Skulduggery laughed at that.

“Hey ! Not true ! I don’t need a cock to be a man ! I ain’t a pussy without one !”, he yelled at his Sister, who grinned evilly.

“Sure...”, she replied sarcastically.

“You are just unfair, little Sister...”, M/n pouted.

Then Skulduggery took out his pocket watch and gasped.

“Oh my ! So late already ? I have to go, Stephanie, M/n.”

“Go ? Go where ?”, she asked.

M/n started to worry. The door is still out...

“There is still some stuff to take care of. First of all I have to find out, why this friendly Gentleman was sent here, and then I want to know, who sent him.”

“You can’t leave us here all alone.”, said Stephanie and followed him into the living room.

“Yes I can. Nothing can happen to you two.”, he denied.

“The front door is out of its hinges and can’t be locked again and my Brother is weakened greatly too !”

“Of course, but as long as they don’t use the front door, nothing can happen to you two.”

“Cut the crap, Skulduggery. Nobody wouldn’t use this opportunity to break in, take what they want and kill us.”, M/n said slightly angered.

Stephanie snatched his hat and he just looked at them.

“Do you want to take my hat hostage ?”, Skulduggery asked Stephanie.

“Either you stay here and take care, that we won’t be attacked again, or we tag along.”

The Skeleton Detective stood stock still at that.

“That, could be dangerous.”, he warned.

“That it will also be, if we stay here.”, she replied.

“But you two have so many places to hide here. There are so many opportunities. I’m sure, that there are a lot of stable closets, which are your sizes. And even under the bed would be a good place to hide. You would be surprised how many people don’t look under there anymore.”

“Mr. Pleasant-“

“Skulduggery and you, please.”, Skulduggery kindly interrupted Stephanie.

“Skulduggery, you saved our lives tonight. Do you really want to ruin all that hard work, by leaving us here all alone, so another person can come and finish us off ?”, she asked.

They continued to argue, while M/n grew more and more nervous. If they stay here all alone, with him in this weakened state, they can most possibly die. The road was flooded and no one would be able to come and help them.

Then Skulduggery talked about the last partner he had, that died at the very first case they had together. He tried to scare them off.

“Well, I don’t plan to die any time soon, and I have something that he didn’t have.”, Stephanie said after Skulduggery finished telling her that his last partner died.

“And that would be ?”, the Detective asked.

“Your hat. Take us with you, or I will stand on it.”, she said darkly.

He looked at her with his big, empty eye sockets and then he stretched out his hand for his hat.

“Don’t say, I didn’t warn you.”, he said.

Stephanie smirked in triumph and she gave him his hat back, while M/n went for his reports for Pleasant. As he came back, he held them out.

“The reports and sample, you wanted.”, M/n said.

Skulduggery took them and nodded.

“Thank you. Now then, let’s go.”

With that they followed him to his own car.

Masterlist HERE !

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #Stephanie Edgley #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 3 – Take us with you

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Cursing, mention of murder, threatening AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 8 – The Coroner is ticked off

Everyone was silent for a little bit at M/n’s outburst. Stephanie turned to the Skeleton.

“I told you not that long ago that he HATES meeting new people that quickly. He is on edge and you really provoke it. Do you WANT him to snap ? That side is ugly.”, she asked Skulduggery.

“I apologize, Corrupted.”, Skulduggery said softly.

“Shove it up your boney ass, Skulkin. You better explain why you dragged us here, because they obviously don’t understand anything. Nor do they know anything. I don’t like them, I want to get out of here and never see them again. Mostly this Meritorius guy.”, M/n growled.

“He didn’t hurt you, Corrupted.”, Ghastly said softly.

“I don’t care if he hurt us or not, Ghastly ! The fact that he thinks everything is fucking easy ticks me off ! Who is HE to tell US if we join this world or not ?! He ain’t my Dad ! My Father died YEARS ago ! Nor is he my fucking Mom ! She is dead too ! I don’t give a flying what he wants !”, M/n yelled angered.

“Corrupted...”, Ghastly tried again.

“Remember what I told you in your shop, Ghastly ?! You understood ! This man obviously doesn’t ! He rather sends us to our fucking graves ! Hell no ! No way in hell am I going back to my old life, only to be murdered, by one of his out of control, freak accident mages ! He can fucking SHOVE it ! I ain’t fucking crazy !”

The Elders stared at M/n in shock. He was pissed.

“Before he losses the last bit of control he has, let me ask Skulduggery something.”, Crow said carefully, to not piss M/n off further.

Skulduggery perked up and looked at her, while M/n stayed silent, his glare never leaving Meritorius and the other two Elders. Then they started to ask him about any evidence about the truce being in danger, as he reported. He said that M/n and his Sister were the evidence, which made the Coroner even angrier. He explained that they got attacked twice by the same mage at the same night and he was after some key.

They asked about the key, but Skulduggery was avoiding the question and accused Serpine. They kept pressing for the key and he let out that they believe it might be for the Sceptre of Ancients, which didn’t make them believe him. They started to argue about it that Serpine was innocent and Gordon wasn’t murdered, nor the Sceptre exists. Skulduggery lost that argument obviously and M/n was very close to snap.

“As for these two, we hoped that they were very much on the edge of our world.”, Meritorius said.

“They won’t tell anyone.”, Skulduggery said quietly.

“That may be, but if they take one more step into our world, they might never go back. We wish that you think clearly about this, Skulduggery Pleasant. Think about, what that will mean.”

“Okay, I’ve had enough in this stupid shit. Talking about us like we aren’t even here ! Now listen here ‘Grand Mage plus extra luggage’ !”, M/n started outraged.

They stared at the boy, who pushed his Sister to Ghastly, who held her softly by the shoulders. M/n got closer to Meritorius and pointed a finger at him.

“YOU nor Pleasant have a say in what me and MY Sister choose to do. I think you were deaf a second ago. WE got ATTACKED and almost KILLED TWICE by one of YOUR dumb MAGES ! He was sent by someone he called his MASTER, that little kinky shithole ! He was ready to KILL us and I LIVE in that DAMNED house ! If I go back NOW, that Pisshead, whoever it is, will pay me a visit one day and KILL me SUCCESSFULLY ! YOU can’t keep your own fucking MAGES in check and expect US to go back, forget about everything AND DIE ?! What in the ever loving fucking hell is WRONG with you, man ?! Either you are too old to give a shit about this, or you are just plain stupid ! Sure we go back to our lives and get fucking KILLED thanks to YOU ! How about you fucking shove it ?!”

Everyone stared at him in shock and silence.

“How about YOU go back to YOUR normal life, without Magic and forget about everything, huh ?! See how you like it ! I don’t care if you are a Grand Mage, someone who is that stupid, doesn’t deserve MY respect ! You have to earn that, old man, and obviously you have a VERY long way to go ! You want us to go back ?! THEN FIND THAT FUCKING MASTER AND GET THEM KILLED ! Otherwise, I will NEVER go back ! You have three hours to find him, if you don’t, I AM FUCKING STAYING, MOTHERFUCKER !”

Ghastly went pale and Stephanie did too. Tome and Crow were in absolute shock and Meritorius looked beyond taken aback.

“YOU HEAR ME ?! YOU FINALLY HEAR ME, BITCH ?! THREE HOURS ! YOU DON’T FIND THE MASTER UNTIL THEN, I WILL STAY IN THIS FUCKING WORLD ! NOT MY FAULT, YOU ARE INCOMPETENT, TO KEEP YOUR MAGES IN CHECK ! I RATHER STAY ALIVE, THANK YOU FOR ASKING AND CARING !!!”, M/n screamed in his face, outraged.

Then he took heavy, fast breaths.

“To tell ME and MY SISTER what to do...WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ?! You heard that we were threatened TWICE already and you insist that we go back and DIE while that PISSHEAD it still out there and walking FREE ! You say MY UNCLE WASN’T MURDERED ! Yet you never saw human doctors do their sloppy work ! They could have been paid to lie and you DARE to CLAIM that there is NO EVIDENCE ?! How about you FUCKING SHOVE IT, OLD MAN ?! YOU KNOW JACKSHIT ! We aren’t in the 18th Century anymore, where everyone did their job without any errors ! Wake up from that belief and that fast ! Get a reality check, you hear ?!”

“Let me to him...he is gone. He will say something he will feel bad about for a while...”, Stephanie told Ghastly.

“You let my Sister close to me and you are the next person I will scream at, Ghastly !”, M/n threatened.

Ghastly kept a firm grip on Stephanie.

“I am not gone, Sister, I am just rightfully pissed off with this ignorant Mage in front of my fucking face ! If I would be gone, I would have beaten the crap out of him ! Like that fucking psycho mage that DARED to lay his NASTY PAWS on you !”, M/n snarled.

His glare never left the Grand Mage.

“I went apeshit as that fucker hurt my Sister. The Pisshead broke in and tried to KILL us. I was ready to murder him and he didn’t see that one coming, you hear me ? I don’t care if that Serpine twat is the Master or not, all I care about is that the Master is getting killed. And if you won’t do anything about it, then I fucking will. NO ONE attacks my Sister and gets away ALIVE. YOU don’t believe in the Sceptre, I say, we at least follow any lead we fucking HAVE. It is better than nothing. The rumor is going around that Serpine looks for the Sceptre and if that is true, you should take it at least a bit into consideration, if you are the fools with a painted smile or if he is. Rumors are also a lead and I better follow it, otherwise we just sit around, twiddle our thumbs and unexpectedly DIE. Who cares if it is the Sceptre, maybe it is a cover up and you honestly sit on your asses and WAIT for something bad to happen ?! How many Humans and Mages will you let perish, until you wake up ?! How many human deaths will you put under a rug and claim, died of natural causes, to make yourself feel better about and so you can sleep at night ?! Look me in my fucking eyes and tell me if I am joking ! Tell me if I am taking your Bullshit ! Tell me what you see, ‘Grand Mage’ ! Go on !”, M/n dared Meritorius.

The Elders saw a fire in M/n’s eyes that told them that he is more than pissed off. But that fire said more than that. He was determined, protective and he doesn’t hate them. He fears for everyone’s safety. This boy, saw more than they can imagine. Then M/n looked at Tome.

“And YOU give me a VERY bad gut feeling. I better not figure out that you are involved with anything bad, otherwise I will go batshit on your Bitchass. Capiche ?”

Tome nodded quickly.

“Good.”, M/n said in a brat mood.

He looked at Eachan again.

“How come Ghastly understands me and you, someone who is way older than him, doesn’t ? Is it your pride or your stupidity ? My Uncle didn’t die of natural causes. I know so, but if you want evidence, I will inspect the body myself. I ain’t a pussy. But then you have the right to shut your mouth, about us and joining your world, and you better think of a damn good apology, for claiming that my Uncle died of natural causes at his young age. He wasn’t eighty for fucks sake.”

At that he turned around and went to his Sister. He stood two feet away from her and then opened his arms.

“Hug. Now. I’m pissed off.”, M/n said with a pout.

Stephanie smiled softly, shook her head and Ghastly let her go. She instantly pulled him into a tight hug and he hugged her back.

“One day you will get in trouble with all these insults you throw when you are angry or stressed.”, she muttered.

“I will have it in control soon, but he pissed me off beyond reason. Like honestly, who is the Crack head here ? Me or him and his extra luggage ?”, M/n asked with a huff, feeling his blood cooling down and his anger rapidly dropping.

Skulduggery looked at M/n and the boy knew the Detective wanted to give his mustard to this.

“Go on, you bag of bones. I don’t give a fuck.”, M/n said.

Skulduggery turned to the Elders and opened his jaw.

“And that was a pissed off Corrupted. I hope you learned to not piss him off again, cause that was actually scarring to witness. He was not joking around.”

“He sure wasn’t...”, Morwenna agreed.

“Noted.”, Sagacious answered quickly.

Meritorius stayed silent. Then he sighed and looked at M/n. Stephanie knew he wanted to tell M/n something, so she parted from him and turned him around, to face the Mage.

“I...deeply apologize, that I offended you, Corrupted. I just thought it was better for you two to return to your normal lives.”

“Meritorius, with all due respect, even though you don’t deserve it from me yet, my ‘Normal’ life is more fucked over than this world could be. Murder plots and Magic ? Is that all you can offer as threats ? What about crazy, psychopathic Scientists ? What about people that snatch children away and use them for their own experiments or pleasure and later on you find their corpses somewhere, mangled beyond recognition ? What about psychos that would love to use you for their own gains ? Ever thought about that shit ? The normal life, is just as fucked up as this one probably is. Maybe even worse.”

The Elders stared at M/n in shock. The Teenage boy gave a sad smile.

“Has its perks when you’ve already seen it all and heard it all.”

“Oh my...”, Morwenna said softly.

M/n shrugged his shoulders.

“Humans are just as much Monsters, as Mages with bad intentions are. The only difference ? Mages have Magic at their disposal. Humans have everything, but that.”

Stephanie hugged her Brother from behind, worried for him.

“Now I would like to leave and follow any lead Skulduggery has, so we can start to rule out stuff and make theories what the key is supposed to do, where it is and what it is supposed to unlock.”

“Of course. Thank you for coming and be careful, yes ? Please think about this very clearly if you want to stay after this is over.”, Meritorius replied.

“I already decided. What my Sister wants, is up to her. I will not influence her to follow my lead or to listen to me. She can choose her own path. I am not her Mother, nor her Father.”

With that M/n left the room, Stephanie said her bye and followed after her Brother quickly. Ghastly and Skulduggery followed quickly after them.

“Can we now go to the vault ? And next time you pull shit like this, Skulduggery Pleasant, I will have your skull and lock it away. Let’s see how you will talk with no head and jaw.”, M/n said with a sour mood.

“Of course, let’s go.”, Ghastly replied.

“I understood, Corrupted...”, Skulduggery muttered.

#skulduggery pleasant #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley #Part 8 – The Coroner is ticked off #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Mention of Murder, attempted Murder AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 6 – Convincing Ghastly

“We are investigating the murder on Gordon Edgley.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Murder ?”, Ghastly asked after a short pause.

“That is right.”

“Who would be interested, in killing Gordon ?”

“We think it was Serpine. We think, he searched, for something.”

Ghastly frowned.

“Skul”, Ghastly started, “usually, when you need my help, you come over, we get going and you get me involved into fights. You usually never tell me, about what it is. Why are you doing it now ?”

“This time I need a different kind of help.”

“So, you don’t need me to beat someone up ?”

“We just would like, that you help us, to find out, what Serpine is after.”

Ghastly nodded.

“I understand.”

“You don’t understand anything, do you ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“Yes. I have no idea, what you want from me.”, Ghastly instantly replied.

Before M/n could explain, or Skulduggery could say anything, Stephanie started talking.

“We think that Serpine is after the-HMPH ?!”

M/n slammed his hand over her mouth and gave Ghastly a small smile.

“Little Sister, this is grown up’s business. Shut it.”

“And you count as grown up ?!”, she yelled, as he took his hand away from her mouth again.

“Yes. I have a job, I saw horror, I deal with horror and I grew up faster than other kids. I am an adult stuck in a 16 year old’s body. Now shush.”, M/n replied.

She scoffed and glared into a direction.

“What do you think he is after ?”, Ghastly pressed.

“Listen, Mr. Bespoke-“

“Ghastly is just fine, Corrupted.”, Ghastly kindly interrupted.

“Ghastly it is then... Listen Ghastly, this is just a theory for now, nor do I think it must have been this Serpine guy, but it was most definitely a Mage that is behind this. Rumors go around that Serpine is looking for the Sceptre of Ancients.”, M/n answered carefully.

Ghastly’s face fell and he wanted to say something, but M/n hurried before he could.

“We already know, that you all say it is just a myth ! Don’t start. We already know. Maybe it isn’t the Sceptre at all, but something else, my Uncle had, and it is just supposed to be a cover up or something, so the Mage won’t be stopped from getting their hands on it. As I’ve learned recently, my Uncle was a Collector of stuff from the world of Mages, like Sorrows. Maybe he had something in his possessions that required his death, before they could get it.”, M/n theorized.

Ghastly looked at M/n interested.

“I didn’t think of that right now. That could be a possibility. But it was said that he died from a heart attack. He was a Mortal.”

“Ghastly, with all due respect, have you seen how human doctors work ? They don’t care about people. They don’t do their job properly anymore, since I’ve been at least nine years of age. They tell you that they found nothing, even though there was something and they were just too stupid to notice it. Honestly, why would my Uncle die from something as stupid as a heart attack ? He had no symptoms for such a thing to occur, he had no diseases that could have triggered it, I was living with him and he had my phone number and he died in his study, where he had a phone right NEXT to him on his desk. He would have called me. He always called me when something was wrong. Even if he just felt a bit sick, he called me and I tried my best to help him. I dropped everything for him whenever he needed me.”, M/n told the tailor.

He stared at M/n at that in shock and then started to think too.

“If he had a heart attack, he would have noticed it before it fully occurred. He was very aware of what was going on with his body in such cases. He would have called me at least 10 minutes before it would have happened and I could have sent medical attention his way. I could have tried to get there myself and try to make it go away. But he never called. A routine we agreed on. If one of us felt weird, be it as small as possible, then you have to inform the other. He NEVER broke that rule before.”

“But...it was diagnosed.”, Ghastly said in confusion.

“Ghastly...this is the world of Mages and my Uncle was involved in it. He helped Skulduggery solving cases and stuff. Do you really think a human would have any idea, of telling, if Magic killed him ?”, M/n asked.

The tailor was silent at that.

“And just so you understand Humans better, someone could have also paid the people that diagnosed him, to lie. For money, humans do everything, even if it hurts many other humans in the process.”, M/n added, voice slightly darker.

“You didn’t...examine him ?”, Ghastly asked.

“No. I wasn’t allowed to, nor did I think I could stomach it. But if I think about it, I might dig my own Uncle out of his grave again and inspect him myself.”, M/n replied darkly.

“Wouldn’t that go against your morals and beliefs ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Either my Uncle understands me and won’t haunt me after that or he won’t and I will be damned, but honestly, I should have had the permission to check on him myself. My colleagues never did a proper job anyways and they inspected my Uncle. Hell no.”

“You might risk too much.”, Ghastly warned.

M/n looked at Ghastly, determination, unconditional love and seriousness in his eyes.

“I am willing to risk everything and anything, for my Family. I am willing to give my life for them and I am willing to kill for their safety. I am not scared to do, what has to be done.”, he said.

Ghastly looked taken aback by that statement.

“But, enough about ME. Let’s get back to the case. As I said, the Sceptre thing COULD be a cover up. You all wrote it off as a myth too, but let us state some facts. A lot of things were written off as myths before too and suddenly, they were proven to be true. No matter how old. I would like to scratch every possibility out and follow every lead that I get, to determine if it is a dead end or another open door, to get closer to the whole image. Which is why we wanted to ask of you, to let us take a look at your family’s collectibles, to see if we can find out anything about the Sceptre and other things, that MIGHT help us. I am not just asking you, because I want to join this world, nor because I want to do something for my Uncle for once as a repayment. I am asking this of you, because there is a Murderer running around, telling other Mages what to do and because you were friends with my Uncle too. You knew him too, maybe not as well as Skulduggery, but you knew him. I ask of your help, because of that.”

“This is crazy. The Sceptre is just a fairytale. This world is not yours, you two. You can still back out.”, Ghastly tried to convince.

“Ghastly”, M/n started, “there is no way back for us. We didn’t just see a bit of magic and a living Skeleton. We were actively hunted down by a Mage already. A Mage, that was told to find a key. We have no idea for what it is, but that Mage was ready to kill us TWICE at the SAME night, to get it. He broke into my home, Uncle Gordon’s house, while we were both staying the night there, because the bridge was flooded from the rain. He wasn’t leaving, no matter what you said or threatened him with. I was lucky to have had Skulduggery’s phone number and that he was close by. He was ready to kill us both and I tried to kill him first. After all, he threatened to kill me and then he started to attack me first, so, what do you do, in that situation, when you have a younger sibling, to protect ? You fight back. Then we saw Magic and Skulduggery as a Skeleton. The door was out of its hinges and we could have been attacked any minute as soon as he left, so we made him take us with himself. As we were about to go back home, as it was getting close to the time Mom would have picked up my Sister, we were attacked again by the same Mage, on the road, in the Bentley.”

Ghastly stared at him in shock.

“I saw it just in time. He wanted to ram us off of the road and kill us, I reacted fast and made the Bentley speed up and out of the way. As my adrenaline wore down and I knew we were safe, I stopped the car and got out, to take a breath, only to be attacked by that man again and I tried to fight him off. Skulduggery made it rain and the man fell into pieces, dying right then and there. Ghastly, this not something you want to forget. I LIVE in Gordon’s house, me and my Sister INHERITED it and will share it as soon as she is eighteen years of age. If I go back to my normal life now, you would make me forget this, I bet, and then I won’t remember and I might risk dying again. Whoever sent that Mage to my home, is ready to kill me. He will pay me a visit one day and then what ?”

Ghastly was very silent at that.

“It is too late to turn back now, for us, Ghastly. Please don’t get mad at us or your friend for it. It was just...bad timing all in all. Sometimes stuff like this happens and...you shouldn’t undo it. I don’t want to die, you hear me ? Not like that. If I die, then I want to die, knowing that I knew and tried to stop it and not... being unable to remember, that I should have seen that coming. I understand that you don’t like us joining this world and I understand what you said. You don’t think we should be here and maybe you are right, but this decision is not with you anymore, it is ours, since we were almost killed twice, at the same night, by the same Mage.”

He looked at M/n and sighed, then nodded.

“Alright, I understand...”, Ghastly said defeated.

“Thank you.”, M/n said softly, a small smile on his lips.

Skulduggery and Stephanie were amazed that M/n could sway Ghastly’s mind like that.

“I understand that you think the Sceptre ain’t real. But many times, fairytales were discovered to have been true all along too, so please understand, that I am willing to believe in it, even if it doesn’t exist. I rather go after clues, rumors and theories, investigate, learn as much as I can about it all, before I say it’s a dead end or maybe a step further into the right direction. So I will ask again: Can you PLEASE let us take a look at your families collectibles ?”, M/n asked again, softly.

He looked at M/n for a very long time and then he sighed in defeat, hanging his head and looking down at his feet.

“Fine, alright... I will bring you there tomorrow. Where do we meet ?”, Ghastly asked defeated.

“At my house. Grimwood. I live there and I am usually the last person that Skulduggery has to pick up. Even though, I fear that he will stay over at my house for a bit, while I try to fix his Bentley. As he left my Sister at my home and helped me to be at the place to get my own car back, he got attacked on the road and his Bentley got damaged.”

Ghastly stared at Skulduggery in shock.

“So that’s what Corrupted meant, when he said that he drove you here.”, the tailor said.

“Yep...”

“Okay then, we will meet at Grimwood’s tomorrow at eight o’clock.”, Ghastly stated.

“Okay.”, M/n answered.

Stephanie nodded, she had nothing else to do anyways and Skulduggery mumbled his agreement. Stephanie got up and with that M/n got up too.

“Corrupted ? I have a question.”, Ghastly stopped the Teen boy.

“What is it ?”, he asked.

“You are a Coroner, so you should know this term... What is a Filicide ?”, Ghastly asked.

‘Ah...he wants to test me and see if I am really a Coroner... Not surprising...’

“Filicide is the act of a parent killing their own child.”, M/n instantly answered.

“And Pedicide ?”, Ghastly asked after a short pause.

“The act of killing children.”, M/n instantly answered.

“Huh, you really are a Coroner, aren’t you ? I hoped you were kidding...”

“Believe me, you aren’t the first to hope that. I chose that path and I will stay on it. Any other questions ?”

“When is it the most difficult, to figure out, what the cause of death was ?”

“1.:  It could have been an internal issue and it may not have been previously diagnosed. 2.:  The victim could have been dead for awhile, so the body will be more decomposed which makes the examination more difficult. 3.:  It may not be a visible cause of death and there may be no other medical information to fall back on.”, M/n immediately answered.

Ghastly’s shoulders slumped in defeat.

“Okay. Thank you.”

M/n nodded sharply and then left the shop, with a stunned Skeleton and Stephanie right behind him.

“Were you educated in all that in your scholarship ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Not really. We had to examine fake bodies there and write reports and theorize on how they died etcetera, but we didn’t learn the terms. Not all of them. I taught them myself as soon as I had more than one case with such bodies.”

“So you had to deal with dead children ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“I had to deal with almost everything already.”, M/n answered grimly.

They were silent at that and got inside the Pontiac Firebird.

“Where to now, Mr. Pleasant ?”, M/n asked with a bit of humor.

“Back to your house. I have nothing much planned, besides looking over a few things, that I can also do at Grimwood.”

M/n nodded and started the engine. He looked at his little sister, who sat next to him this time, and smiled. She smiled back.

“That means we will spend more time with one another and I can watch you work on the Bentley.”, she said in triumph.

“No, it means you will rest well.”, M/n replied with a big grin.

She looked at him insulted as M/n started to drive away and back home. Skulduggery only crooked his head in amusement.

‘These two will never stop to fool and insult each other, will they ?’, Skulduggery thought.

As they were on the road for a while, M/n looked into the mirror and directly at Skulduggery.

“So, Skulduggery...I have a question.”

“What is it, Corrupted ?”

‘Right...I have to get used to that now even more...’, M/n thought bemused.

“Serpine...why do you accuse him of everything ? I get it, he killed you, he killed many more in the war, he doesn’t sound like a nice guy right now either and he is dangerous, but I can’t help the feeling, that you have a grudge against him for a whole different reason.”

Skulduggery seemed to stiffen up and he was very silent.

“I am not ready to talk about that yet, Corrupted. But you are right...”, Skulduggery answered after a while.

M/n nodded his head.

“Alright...Fine. No pressure.”

-Time skip-

They arrived not long ago and, after M/n parked his car into the backyard, he ran into the garage to take a look at the Bentley. He huffed in frustration as he saw the driver’s door. It was completely smashed in and very hard to open.

Skulduggery was next to him in a second.

“Can you do anything about that ?”, the Skeleton asked.

“You are lucky that it is only the door. I need to repair the damage, which will take two hours, but it will be fine after. Don’t worry.”, he replied with a smile.

Skulduggery nodded and then left.

For two hours, M/n was tinkering around and a few times either Skulduggery or M/n’s Sister came inside, to check on him. After three hours, M/n was finally done and you couldn’t even tell that it ever was damaged. He smiled and left the garage.

He spotted Skulduggery in the living room, looking over the reports that M/n gave him around midnight.

“Your car is fixed. Took a bit longer than I calculated in, but it is done and I think it doesn’t look all that bad.”, M/n said.

Skulduggery looked up and then got up, checking on his car. The Coroner just sat down and then saw that Skulduggery made small side notes to his research. He read a little bit about it, but was confused at the notes.

Skulduggery soon came back and M/n snapped his head up at him.

“Thank you. You can’t even tell that it was damaged at all. I am impressed.”, the Skeleton said.

“No problem.”

“You read the side notes, didn’t you ?”

“Yep.”

“You are confused what they mean, aren’t you ?”

“Absolutely.”, M/n confirmed.

“Do you want me to explain ?”

“If you want to. Otherwise I will seek out my little Sister and make us dinner.”

Skulduggery sat down next to him and pointed at the notes M/n made.

“The substance was slightly green and blackish. It is almost invisible to the human eye, yet, you saw it. The blackish spots, I suspect, are Necromancy leftovers and the greenish spots, are leftovers of poisoning. You did say that this substance seemed to have climbed their way up, so it is a climbing substance. I will have to bring it to someone who can take a closer look and tell me what poison that is, so I am already looking for someone.”

“Ah...okay.”

Skulduggery continued to explain the rest of his confusing side notes and M/n slowly got the whole image. After like an hour M/n understood the whole thing and got up.

“I get it ! Okay. You have such confusing side note taking skills...honestly. Gordon would have smacked me with the newspapers, if I would have done the same stuff, you do, to him.”, M/n said slightly jealous.

Skulduggery chuckled.

“What can I say ? Your Uncle wasn’t MY Uncle.”

“What is that supposed to mean, huh ?! My Uncle was great ! Sucks to be you, that you didn’t had my Uncle as your own ! Hah ! Suck on that, Skulkin !”

With that M/n sprung up, snatched Skulduggery’s hat and ran out of the room.

“Hey !”, Skulduggery protested, got up and chased after M/n.

Stephanie looked out of the study of her Uncle’s as she saw M/n dashing through the hallway, past her and the room, and entered his own. Not long later did Skulduggery chase after him and he slammed against the door, which M/n slammed shut in the Skeleton’s face. Just then did Stephanie see, that his hat was missing.

“Corrupted ! Give me my hat back !”

“Never, Skulkin !”, M/n replied from inside his room.

M/n hid Skulduggery’s hat in his closet and then sat on his bed, smiling evilly. Stephanie pushed Skulduggery away a bit and opened the door. She sighed as she saw her Brother’s mischievous face. Skulduggery entered.

“Where is it ?”, he asked with a slight warning.

“You have to find it.”, M/n said with a big grin.

“M/n is in a childish mood. Just play along.”, Stephanie told the Detective.

“I swear if you sit on it...”, the Skeleton growled slightly.

M/n frowned and stood up, off of his bed.

“I didn’t as you can see.”, he answered innocently.

Skulduggery muttered something and then he started to inspect the room. After he didn’t find it on any furniture, he stared at the closets and drawers. He opened them all and looked everywhere, but couldn’t find his hat. M/n chuckled and Skulduggery got frustrated. He turned to him.

“I give up. Where did you hide it ?”

M/n got up and went to the last closet, Skulduggery opened, shoved a few clothes aside and opened a small compartment in the back. Skulduggery’s hat was shown and he pulled it out, giving it back to him.

“You need to get better in the game. I will do that more often.”, M/n said.

“That is one of his rare moments where he acts like a kid for a bit.”, Stephanie said as M/n put everything back in place.

Then M/n cooked dinner and after they ate, they went to bed, while Skulduggery stayed the night.

What no one knew, was, that a woman was near the bridge, which led to Grimwood, and killed a Troll. What no one knew, was, that Mr. Bliss talked to her. What no one knew, was, that Skulduggery was right all along. Serpine was about to break the truce. What no one knew, was, that Bliss tried to avoid it somehow, so they won’t slip back into a war. What no one knew, was, that he was concerned that he won’t succeed.

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #read warnings above #not the canon au #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 6 – Convincing Ghastly

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Anger issued Reader, cursing, threatening, mild violence, Fergus x Beryl (They are really people responsible for snger issues) AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !

Part 1 - Gordon’s Testament

Gordon was dead and the Edgley Family was with Gordon’s lawyer, to hear who inherited what. Fergus, Beryl, Carol and Crystal were VERY impatient, while they had to wait for two more people.

“Can’t we just start without them already ?!”, Beryl demanded like a spoiled brat.

“No, we have to wait for the last two people.”, Mr. Fedgewick answered nervously.

Then a man, face completely covered in a scarf, hat and sunglasses, entered.

“I apologize for my lateness, it really didn’t get sooner.”, the man excused himself.

“You are ?”, Fergus asked with annoyance.

“Skulduggery Pleasant.”, the covered man answered.

Beryl scoffed and looked at Melissa and Desmond.

“Of course YOUR brat will be late ! At such an important day he HAS to be late !”, she yelled.

“Don’t talk about my Brother like that.”, Stephanie defended.

Then Melissa’s phone rang and she sighed in relief as she saw her Son’s name appear. She answered and put him on speaker.

“Hello, Son. Where are you ?”, she asked worried.

“Hey Mom ! I am so sorry ! I forgot to bring something to my workplace and had to go there to turn it in, because it was due for today. Then I wanted to drive straight to Mr. Fedgewick’s and meet you all there, but I am stuck in traffic. A car accident happened and I am stuck in here. I will need another 10 to 15 minutes to get out of here. Do you think you can wait that long ? Otherwise I am fine with you all hearing Uncle’s Will without me. It will be saddening that I am not there, but this was really unexpected and I am unsure how long Mr. Fedgewick will have time. He probably has other clients too...”, a teenage boy’s voice explained.

Before Beryl and Fergus could snarl at Fedgewick, to read the Will already, Stephanie replied.

“We can wait. This reading means a lot to you and you are Family too.”

Melissa nodded and smiled at her, while Stephanie’s Aunt and Uncle scoffed in hatred.

“She is right, Son. Just be careful and don’t drive too fast, yes ?”, Melissa said worried.

“I will be careful, Mom. I will be there soon. I am really sorry, that I am so late today. Usually I am always the first one to arrive and this is just embarrassing...”

“It could have happened to anyone, Son. Don’t sweat it. I stuck a lot in traffic and came late to work and meetings. No one was ever mad at me for it.”, Desmond replied happily.

The boy chuckled.

“Thanks, Dad. I love you two, see you soon. And Steph...when I arrive there, you better give me back my SD card.”

Stephanie chuckled.

“I have it in my bag.”

“Good.”

With that they hung up and waited a bit more.

-Twenty minutes later-

He cursed as he ran through the corridors and to the office. Why had this to happen to him at this day ?! Got he could beat himself up about this right now ! He soon arrived at the door and knocked gently.

“Come in !”, Fedgewick’s voice called.

He opened the door and breathed heavily, then entered and closed the door, taking off his coat.

“I am so very sorry that I am late. Traffic was a nightmare. The police gave my side two minutes to pass, while the other got ten. The traffic lights were broken and there was a nasty car accident, so police had to deal with it. Did I miss anything important already ?”, the Teenager asked.

“Are you M/n Edgley ?”, Fedgewick asked.

“Yes, that is me. Do you need my ID ? I have brought it with me, in case.”, M/n replied.

Fedgewick nodded and M/n quickly got out his purse and pulled out his ID card. He gave it to Fedgewick and he checked it over, after that he nodded and gave it back to him.

“Well then, FINALLY we can start.”, Beryl replied pissed and glared at M/n.

M/n scoffed as he sat down.

“Shut it, woman, you are the most disrespectful person here. If I were you, I would be praying that I even got something from my Brother in law. For your personality, I wouldn’t be surprised if he would only give you a boot to the head.”, he replied to her comment.

“You little shit ! Respect your elders !”, she yelled.

“You are older than me ? Then fucking act like it. All I see is a spoiled little brat that is a five year old. You aren’t older than me.”, he scoffed.

“Why YOU-?!”

“Anyways. Now that I am here, let us start, yes ? I still have so much paperwork to do...”, M/n said slightly saddened and rudely interrupting Beryl.

Just then he spotted Skulduggery Pleasant and he gave the person a smile.

“I think we haven’t met before. My apologies, that I didn’t notice you, Sir. My name is M/n Edgley. What is yours, if I may ?”

“It is nice to meet you Mr. Edgley. My name is Skulduggery Pleasant.”, the man covered in a scarf, sunglasses and had said, nodding his head in respect.

“Ah, Uncle talked a bit about you. His best friend, as much, as I recall. Nice to finally see you in person. I was worried that Gordon was messing with me at this point, given I never saw you around.”

The man chuckled.

“I was pretty busy, but came to visit often.”, he replied.

“Ah, that explains it. The job must be pretty serious then, otherwise you would have a lot of time. Every job is different after all.”, M/n said smiling.

Skulduggery nodded.

“He is a weirdo. Who covers their face like this ?”, Fergus scoffed in disgust.

M/n’s smile fell and it turned into an annoyed glare.

“Believe it or not, Mr. Snotty 24/7, there are people that are VERY insecure about their looks and rather hide them. From where would YOU know, what this Gentleman went through, huh ? Maybe he had a terrible accident and his face got it worst or he was attacked once and barely made it out alive or he was born a bit weird looking, that he started to hate it. Who the flying FUCK are YOU, to judge people that hide their face, hmm ?”, M/n snarled back in disrespect, getting fed up with his and his Wife’s attitude.

“You little-!”

“Now then, I deeply apologize for these Crack heads. Can we start ? I fear if I stay any longer with them in here, I will start a scene. I never got along with these people.”, M/n asked kindly and rudely interrupted Fergus.

Stephanie smiled in amusement and Fedgewick chuckled slightly.

“You are almost like Gordon was. Honest and still humorous.”, the lawyer said.

“What can I say ? I take more after him. I liked the way he was as a person and looked slightly up to him. Thanks to him, I am the person I am today.”, M/n said happily.

Stephanie, her parents and Fedgewick smiled at that, while the other half of the Edgley Family glared at him. Then Fedgewick started to give them all his condolences, with Baryl interrupted rudely, wanting to cut straight to the chase, which made M/n lose his smile yet again. He turned to her.

“Shut the fuck up, will you ? Here are people that cared about Gordon. Just because you don’t, doesn’t that mean, that you can tell anyone what to do. If you don’t wanna hear it, then get the fuck out. No one wants to hear your snotty, bratty attitude.”

“How about you learn manners ?!”, Fergus yelled.

“How about you look in a mirror and take your own advice, Fergus ? You, your Wife and your children are all VERY disrespectful. So shut the fuck up and if you don’t like it, get the fuck out. No one wants to hear you, you Gold diggers.”, M/n snarled back in hatred.

“You little adopted shit !”, Carol yelled.

M/n glared at her.

“You, better bake VERY little buns right now, you little Bitch. Get involved again and I might make you shut up in a way you won’t like.”, he threatened darkly.

“Is that a threat towards my daughter ?!”, Beryl yelled.

“Yes, it is ! You all apparently didn’t learn any manners as children, so I might as well, smack her across the face if she keeps it up ! You two grown up idiots can’t even raise your own kids properly !”, M/n hollered.

Stephanie got up and went over to her older, adopted, Brother. She pulled him into a hug, while he continued to glare at the wedded couple with hatred and disgust.

“Calm down, M/n... They aren’t worth it.”, she tried to calm him down.

“I can’t do this anymore, Stephanie ! Everywhere we go or show up with them, they are like this ! They treat everyone like utter shit and think they are the most perfect people ever ! I am sick and tired of it ! All they do is embarrass us ! God, every time we go somewhere with these people, I am in second hand embarrassment ! I have to pretend that I don’t even KNOW them, with their disgusting attitude ! I’m sick and tired of it !”

At that everyone was dead silent. M/n was pissed off and that rightfully.

“I HATE them ! All they do is care about themselves ! They never cared about Uncle Gordon and now they demand to get something from him ?! I hope they get close to nothing from him !”, he yelled.

Stephanie hugged M/n tighter and he hugged back, tears coming to his eyes. No one could tell if it was from rage or sadness, but it, none the less, made everyone go silent at once, while Stephanie was there for him.

After a while, she parted and pulled her chair next to him, so she was close, in case he had another rage episode. M/n was always short tempered and quick to rage when Fergus and Beryl were around with their kids. It wasn’t always like that, but one day, they were just toxic to each other and M/n wanted nothing to do with them since, only if necessary, did he spend time with them. And with necessary, it meant when Melissa forced him to stay and spend time with the whole Family.

“Excuse me...please continue.”, M/n got out with a quiet voice.

He was still calming down, but Fedgewick nodded and started with opening the Testament. Again giving his condolences and everything, this time, no one interrupted him, in fear M/n will lash out again.

Skulduggery kept a close eye on M/n. The Teenager seemed to be between 15 and 18 years of age and he seemed very sad.

Then Fedgewick read out what Beryl and Fergus got.

His Car, boat and a little present. As they asked what the present was, in excitement, he opened a small box and in it laid a brooch. It looked old, but M/n, none the less, smirked.

Gordon’s car wasn’t worth much to sell, the brooch was old and pretty, but not much worth and then the boat. It was a small one and also not worth much, because it was old and needed some work to look better.

M/n would have laughed, if he wouldn’t feel so incredibly sad at the same time. His Uncle was dead. He always brightened up his day after work, always knew what to do with him...He was the best and he left. Why couldn’t someone from Fergus’ side have died ? They were always rude and mean...and they only cared about the money Gordon made anyways. They didn’t like M/n either and they never helped, nor supported him, in anything he did.

It was unfair !

After that, they tried to know what else they got, but that was all, which made Beryl wail. M/n scoffed and stared at her with darkness in his eyes.

“Kindly get out of the room and cry. As many say in my workplace ‘Cry silently, Chantalle.’”, M/n scoffed.  (In my school we knew that term, please don’t take it as offense, whoever knows a Chantalle ! We just had that saying !)

Fedgewick then looked at Skulduggery Pleasant and read out a small text that Gordon wrote down. He left the man only an advice.

“Your path is yours alone and I don't want to dissuade you, but sometimes we find the greatest enemy within ourselves and fight the greatest battles against the darkness within. A storm is coming and sometimes the key to safe harbor remains hidden from us. Sometimes, however, it is right in front of our eyes.”

Everyone stared at Skulduggery with wide eyes, besides M/n. He was very interested in that advice. It sounded more like a riddle he had to solve. M/n got out his phone, opened Word and then wrote the whole thing down quickly. He will figure this out ! His Uncle was very cryptic, but he knew for a fact that this was a riddle. He will solve it !

Stephanie looked at her older Brother and saw that he typed it all down quickly. So he thought it was important and a riddle to solve. She knew, from the moment this stranger entered the office, that there was something about him. Something mysterious and dangerous.

M/n stuffed his phone back into his pocket as he finished and waited for the rest to snap out of their momentum.  Skulduggery only nodded silently. Fergus then told his Wife that they were at least lucky enough to get the few things Gordon had, instead of some stupid advice. She just hissed at him to be silent, which made him cower away.

“He is right, be grateful, Beryl. And you know what the best part is ? This Gentleman is taking it with dignity and respect. Just an advice and yet, he accepts this and doesn’t whine about it. I understand why he liked you, Mr. Pleasant.”, M/n said smiling.

Skulduggery chuckled softly and nodded.

“Thank you. His advices are greatly appreciated. I need them a lot.”, he replied.

M/n smiled.

“My Uncle was cool in that way, aren’t I right ? He helped me with these a lot too.”

“Hah ! A Team member then, huh ?”, he asked jokingly.

“Seems so.”, M/n chuckled.

Then Melissa and Desmond had their turn. He joked about leaving Desmond his Wife, that he successfully took away from Gordon. Of course it was a joke. They were saddened a bit and then Fedgewick read out that Desmond also inherited his Villa in France.

Beryl made a scene at that, while Fergus wanted her to stop her tantrum. She went on about how much worth it is and it made M/n’s blood boil.

“Fergus, put her on a leash, before I snap and slap her so hard that she will see starts, pass out and wake up in a hospital.”, M/n growled out pissed.

Fergus grew worried. M/n never threatened to hurt Beryl.

“Beryl, please calm down...”

“NO !”

M/n snapped up and stalked towards her.

“You shut your ugly trap right now ! Otherwise you won’t like the outcome, Bitch ! I warned you multiple times that I am VERY close to snap at you ! Sit your fat ass down and shut it !”, M/n screamed.

“You are my Nephew ! You have to RESPECT ME YO-!”

SLAP !

The whole room was dead silent and Beryl looked at her left, eyes wide in shock, while her right cheek formed a red handprint. M/n glared at her, his hand still in position to give her a backhand slap too. M/n looked livid.

“I. Said. SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, BITCH !”, M/n screamed at her pissed off.

She whimpered and sat down instantly, tears in her eyes.

“Just WHY do we have to deal with people like YOU, Beryl ?! My GOD are you ANNOYING and OBSESSED with showing off and money ! No wonder Uncle Gordon didn’t want you to have anything too expensive ! Such an ungrateful woman like you, I have NEVER met in my LIFE !”, M/n raged.

Stephanie quickly pulled him to his chair and hugged him tightly again. She was his anchor, when he let his rage consume him.

“DON’T mess with my Family, Bitch ! They deserved the Villa, because they CARED about Gordon as a PERSON, not some fucking PAYCHECK !”

“We are Family too, M/n.”, Fergus said softly.

“NO YOU ARE NOT ! I WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU AS A PART OF MY FAMILY ! ALL YOU EVER DID WAS HATE UNCLE GORDON ! YOU !!! HIS OWN FUCKING BROTHER !! GO TO HELL, FERGUS !”, M/n yelled in rage and pure hatred.

He looked away, scared for his life.

“M/n, Brother, remember what the psychologist said a few years ago, yeah ? Don’t let your rage consume you. Take deep breaths. Relax. No one is hurt. We are all fine. Remember what Uncle Gordon said, yes ?”, she whispered into his ear.

M/n’s rage was gone in a flash as she mentioned Gordon. His eyes went wide and then he hugged her back, tears again in his eyes.

“S-sorry, Steph...”, he muttered out.

“It’s okay. Just stay calm, okay ? No one is hurt and we won’t have to endure them that long anymore, okay ? After this testament is over, we can leave and have some bobba tea, okay ?”

He nodded with a small smile and sat down again, this time Stephanie sat on his lap, to keep him grounded.

“Is he always like this ? No judgment, just curious.”, Skulduggery asked softly.

Melissa and Desmond looked at him worried, while Stephanie felt like she had to answer him.

“Only if someone hurts us, threatens us or if Beryl and Fergus are around him with their kids. He is very overprotective of Family and he hates people that see his Family as an object, they can use. So he gets pissed off very easily.”, she answered softly.

M/n wrapped his arms around his little Sister and hid his face in her left shoulder, still trying to calm down. She felt that he was shaking. Skulduggery only nodded at that. He knew that kind of rage and protectiveness. It has been a while since he saw someone, who was just like he used to be.

“Can we please just continue ?”, M/n asked softly.

Stephanie rubbed M/n’s hands softly, to help him calm down. Fedgewick looked back down at the paper and continued to read, understanding that M/n got more and more unstable.

“With all that sorted out, I want to come to my Niece and Nephew now.”, he read out loud.

M/n and Stephanie looked at him with wide eyes. They will also inherit something ? Is Uncle Gordon serious ?

“I regret that I never had children of my own, but at the same time I felt lucky that I never had any, if I think at what Fergus and Beryl produced.”, he contined to read out.

M/n smirked and Stephanie had to keep her chuckle in.

“Although I have to admit that I saw Steph and M/n like my own kids at some point, sorry Melissa and Desmond, but I had to be honest. M/n, I know that you are adopted and that you always felt like, you weren’t good enough for anyone. That you felt like you never tried or did enough, but I promise you, you are enough. You do enough. You try enough. I know you are only 16 years of age, but you already finished school and college with 13 years of age, thanks to your incredible intelligence. I am proud of you and of how far you have come in such little time. And as you know, I let you move in with me, so you have more space to work and storage notes in and for Stephanie to finally have a bigger room to herself. I don’t want you to move out, so I decided, since you and Steph were both like my own kids that you have to share my house together.”

Their eyes went wide and M/n smiled happily. He was already worried where he should go that had enough space for him to work even from home, but now, this was a blessing to him. And he will share it with his little Sister ! He hugged her tightly, he didn’t mind sharing, all he wanted was for her to own the house too and he was happy they both own it now.

“Stephanie, my wonderful niece, I hope you aren’t all that mad with that decision. I want to give you also a few words, before I reveal what else YOU alone will inherit. The world is bigger, than you think, and scarier, as you can imagine. The only currency, that is worth something, is that, you always stay loyal to yourself, and the only goal, that is worth going for, is to find out, who you really are.”, Fedgewick read out.

She was giving a sad smile, while M/n smiled at her too, saddened, but with slight joy for her.

“Make your parents proud and take care, that they are lucky, to have you, because I am leaving to you all of my possessions, my financial assets and my royalties. They shall with the day, you’ll turn eighteen, be transferred to you. I want to use this opportunity and tell you, that I love you all in my very own way, even those, that I don’t like very much. I mean you with that, Beryl.”

Beryl scoffed softly, but instantly cowered away as M/n glared at her, with a dark promise.

“Before we end this whole testament, I want to remind you of something, M/n.”, Fedgewick continued to read out.

M/n snapped his attention back to him, listening.

“We all know you have serious anger issues and you are very overprotective, maybe even a bit territorial, of the Family. Anything bad, no matter how small, sets you off into a raging storm and that goes to Family only. Remember what I told you. No matter how outraged you get, try to keep a clear head for me, okay ? Rage can make you blind and you could lash out, doing or saying something, you didn’t mean to. Rage makes you think illogically, so please, always try to stay calm enough to take in your surroundings. Think, before you act. I know you are a very smart and clever boy, so please use that head of yours. I know you will miss me terribly, because now you have no one that will help you out, when you are stuck or stressed out, so I thought of something small, but don’t have too much hope on it.”

M/n listened very carefully and he was confused. What was his Uncle planning ?

“I bet you met Skulduggery Pleasant, my friend that I told you a bit about. You two have almost similar jobs. I ask of Skulduggery, as a very good friend, to give you his phone number. He might be able to help you in some problems you are going to be stuck in. And no, Skul, I don’t mean any physical problems, I mean in his job, some problems. After all...your jobs are almost the same. Please help him out when he asks for your help. I trust you enough for this. I love you all and I hope you will live happily.”, Fedgewick finished and took off his glasses.

M/n was surprised and Skulduggery seemed to be too.

“Similar jobs, huh ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“What kind of job, M/n ?”, Melissa asked.

M/n felt himself sweating at that question.

“Marketing ! I got promoted and I do marketing stuff now and I design websites. I didn’t know Mr. Pleasant had something similar to it.”, he lied quickly.

Skulduggery seemed to pick up on it, while the others blindly believed him.

“Ah, yes. I do something quite similar. I am surprised you do such a job as well.”, he replied, playing along.

“You might have some tricks that I don’t know of. Can’t wait to learn from them.”, M/n played it off.

“Of course.”

Stephanie got up and M/n stood up as well. Beryl threw a fit and M/n raced out of the room, wishing Fedgewick a nice day and thanking him for everything. Skulduggery was close behind him.

“Alright.”, M/n said as he was alone with the mysterious man.

“What are you actually doing for a job ?”, M/n asked.

“You say yours first.”, Skulduggery replied.

“I work as a Coroner.”, M/n answered honestly.

Skulduggery was stunned into silence.

“You, a Coroner ?”

“Yep. I worked and studied very hard for it and with 13 years I got the job. I have been very good since, but there are newly some...clients that seem to have died...weirdly. Or better...murdered....weirdly... Any time I was stuck and couldn’t make sense of it, Gordon helped me. He made me relax and then we talked about it, then he came up with conclusions and at least one of them was always right.”, M/n explained.

“You are sixteen and you work as a Coroner ?”, he repeated.

“I had to grow up way faster than others. When you lived on the streets for a while and saw horror at its worst, as a kid none the less, you don’t get scared that easily anymore when you work with corpses.”, M/n said slightly monotone.

“Oh dear... I work as a Detective.”, Skulduggery answered softly.

M/n stared at the masked man in surprise.

“Huh. Uncle was right then. We have similar jobs. You solve the Crime and who did it, while I inspect the corpses and what killed them.”

“Seems so.”

“Though, I bet you do a different Detective job, because I’ve never seen, nor heard of you around here before. So I guess you work on ‘special’ cases. Am I right ?”

“You can call it that.”, Skulduggery confirmed.

“Okay... I have some ‘special’ cases sometimes, that the Crime police doesn’t want to waste their time on, because they think it is stupid or too much of a hassle. I can send you one and you could tell me if that would fall into your categories of ‘special’ cases.”, M/n offered.

“That would be a good idea.”

“Well then...phone number ? I could send you pictures of the reports then.”

“Oh, right.”

Skulduggery pulled out a pen and paper and wrote down his phone number, then he gave it to M/n.

“Thank you, Sir.”

“If we work together a few times, just call me Skulduggery. Sir makes me feel older than I am.”

“Okay, Skulduggery. I will text you later, when I have the reports.”

“Splendid.”

Then Skulduggery looked at his pocket watch and sighed.

“Well, I have to get going to work now.”, he told the Teen.

He was about to leave as M/n stopped him.

“Hey.”

“Yes ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“If you need help or something, tell me, yeah ? I might look like I don’t know a lot, but I know more than anyone thinks. If you are stuck on something, tell me and I’ll try to help. Helping goes both ways, after all.”, M/n said softly, with a kind smile.

Skulduggery felt touched.

“I will. Same goes to you. If you are in ANY trouble, call me. I will come to help.”

“Any trouble ? Even physical ones ?”, M/n asked softly.

“Any trouble. That includes physical trouble. If you feel watched or are being followed, call me and I will come.”

M/n smiled brighter and nodded.

“I will, thank you.”

“You are welcome. After all, Coroner is just as much of a dangerous job, as a Detective one’s is.”

With that Skulduggery left and M/n felt a bit touched. He understood now why Gordon liked this guy.

Masterlist HERE !

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #valkyrie cain #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #Gordon Edgley #Stephanie Edgley #Family Edgley #Fergus #Beryl #Carol #Crystal #Mr. Fedgewick #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 1 - Gordon’s Testament

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Cursing

Part 7 – The Elders

It was 7:15 o’clock as M/n woke up and he quickly freshened up and then started to make Breakfast. He spotted Skulduggery in the Living room.

“Morning Skulduggery.”, he greeted.

“Good morning, Corrupted.”, Skulduggery greeted back.

“Is my Sister already on her toes ?”

“No, not yet.”

“Ghastly already here ?”

“No, he is not.”

“Good, I didn’t oversleep then. I am making Breakfast. You think I should cook for Ghastly too ?”

“I would recommend. He tends to not eat Breakfast when he made appointments this early in the day.”

“Okay. Is he allergic to anything ? I am planning to make pancakes. Is he allergic to eggs, milk, flour or even butter?”

“No he is not allergic to any of that.”

“Okay. Cool. I am making a portion for three then. My Sister wolves Pancakes down like crazy...”

“Okay.”

“If the door rings or knocks and I am cooking, the key is in the small bowl in the hallway, so you can open the door for Ghastly. Remember to check if it is him, otherwise do NOT open the door.”

Skulduggery hesitated at that. M/n sounded aggressive about checking the door before opening it. Why ?

“Alright ? Why though ?”, he asked.

M/n looked around nervously.

“I usually feel like someone is around my house that wants something from me. In a BAD way. I never open my door usually, besides I have to go to work or shopping or to Family meet ups.”

“You are just a bit paranoid, aren’t you ?”

“Shove it, Skeleton. I am rather careful than reckless.”, M/n hissed and then entered the kitchen.

He got out the ingredients and then started to make the batter. He mixed it with his own strength until there were no more clumps of flour and no more egg yolk left. Then he got out his pan, butter, knife, a plate, tea spoon, ladle and his favorite spatula.

He turned the stove on and turned up the heat, then tasted the batter, if it was seasoned enough, he nodded in satisfaction as it tasted just right. In a few minutes the butter, he put in the pan, was melted and he put the first small ladle of batter into the pan. The batter smoothly spread around in the pan and filled it all out. After a few minutes, M/n turned it around to see it perfectly cooked on the first side, then, he waited again, a few minutes and checked the underside. It was perfectly done, so he got the first one out of the pan, checked if the butter was enough and then added the next ladle of batter into the pan.

By the eighth pancake, M/n left the stove and looked at Skulduggery.

“Did she still not get up ? It is 7:40 o’clock.”, M/n asked the Skeleton.

He shook his head.

“Do you want me to wake her up ?”, he asked.

“Either that or you watch the pancake in the pan and check the underside of it. When it is done in your opinion get it out, add butter and then add the next ladle. Simple.”

“I take the cooking.”, Skulduggery said and went to the kitchen and on the stove.

“Okay. I will wake up my Sister, like a good big Brother.”, M/n said with a big grin.

He took out his phone and started to make a video. He went up the stairs, into a Bathroom, took a washcloth, made it wet with ice cold water and then left again. He entered his little Sister’s room and smirked as he saw her still sleeping. He aimed the cloth at her face and then threw it.

SMACK !

Stephanie screamed in shock and trashed around, M/n started to laugh loudly and she stiffened up. She spotted the ice cold, wet washcloth that hit her in the face and she glared at her Brother, seeing his phone.

“YOU ASSHOLE !”, she screamed.

M/n wheezed as she covered herself with the blanket, even though she wore a shirt. She smiled, not entirely mad at him. It was rare to have M/n laugh this hard and earnest.

“Wake-Hahaha !-Wake up sleepy head ! Hahahaha !”, he laughed out.

She smiled and threw the rag back at him, which hit him between the legs. It only made him laugh harder and she chuckled.

After a bit they calmed down and M/n stopped the recording. That will be a memory to laugh at. He smiled fondly, already planning to put that on a DVD for memories.

“How late is it ?”, she asked.

“Seven fifty o’clock.”

Her eyes widened and she jumped out of her bed, running around to get ready for the day. M/n smiled and left her room. He was about to enter the kitchen again, to free Skulduggery from the stove, as the doorbell rang. M/n changed his route and looked through the peephole.

He saw Ghastly, his face entirely covered. But the eyes betrayed him. M/n took out his keys and unlocked the front door, then he opened the door.

“Hello Ghastly. Skulduggery and I are cooking Pancakes. Come in. We will eat something, I will get ready and then we can go.”, M/n said warmly.

Ghastly entered and pulled off his scarf. He looked at M/n in shock.

“How do you know that I didn’t have Breakfast ?”, the tailor asked, taking off his coat.

“I asked Skulduggery, if I should count you in. He said I should.”

Ghastly hung up his coat, scarf and hat. Then he followed M/n into the living room and M/n entered the kitchen, seeing that Skulduggery did a well job.

“Move over, I’ll take back over. You can set the table. My Sister is getting ready, so you are the only one with no job. We need three plates, forks, knives and six tea spoons.”, M/n said.

Skulduggery nodded and got the utensils out. Then he left and entered the living room.

“Hello and good morning, Ghastly.”, Skulduggery greeted.

“Hello and good morning to you too, Skulduggery.”, Ghastly greeted back.

He put the plates and silverware down, then he entered the kitchen again.

“Good to know you are back. In the fridge are marmalades. We need Strawberry, plum jam, sour cherry, syrup, blackberry and Nutella, from the cupboards. Oh ! And we need cinnamon sugar. It is next to the Nutella. Thank my Sister for all the variations. If it would be me, I would only want sour cherry and plum jam. She is a very random, picky person...”

“It’s fine.”, Skulduggery assured M/n and he opened the fridge, grabbing a few marmalades and carried them to the table in the living room.

After he finished with setting the table, M/n had only three more pancakes to make. As he was about to make the last one, all three men heard fast steps and soon Stephanie appeared in the living room. Panic in her eyes and her hair a mess.

“M/- BUBBA ?!”, she yelled.

As she spotted Ghastly she quickly avoided to call his name. M/n looked out of the kitchen and his eyes widened at her hair.

“What have you done to your hair, again, Sister ?!”

“I didn’t do anything ! The brush won’t go through and my hair refuses to cooperate !”, she said in a panic.

Frustrated tears were in her eyes. Today was a day where she had very frustrating hair. Usually it cooperates with her and the brush. M/n sighed and washed his hands.

“Skulduggery, you have stove watch duty. I have to take care of my Sister’s lion mane...”

“Got it.”, Skulduggery replied and went back into the kitchen.

M/n then walked back with Stephanie into the bathroom and he took care of her wild hair. Skulduggery soon enough turned off the stove and put the last pancake on the plate, then brought it to the table.

“OWW !”, Stephanie yelled.

Ghastly sat up straighter. Skulduggery knew what he was thinking about.

“If you want to help them, go and ask if you can.”, the Skeleton said.

“Corrupted seems very protective.”, Ghastly said unsure.

“He only gets aggressive if someone dares to be a pervert. You aren’t one, Ghastly.”

“OWWW ! M/N IT HURTS !!!”, Stephanie screamed loudly.

“You really should help.”

Ghastly nodded, got up and went to the bathroom. He knocked gently on the door and M/n opened the door.

“Hey, Ghastly.”

“Hey, is everything okay ? Do you need help ?”, he asked the boy.

“I guess I do... The spray doesn’t work this time and her hair is really unruly today.”, M/n sighed out frustrated.

“I can help.”, he offered.

M/n sighed and opened the door wider, letting Ghastly enter.

“Try your best...”

Ghastly looked at her hair and winced. She looked about to break down. Ghastly took the brush and took out all the hair that was stuck in it, then he grabbed the hairspray and read it. He shook his head.

“Bow your head over the tub. I will rinse your hair out again and we will see if your hair will listen this time.”, Ghastly instructed.

Stephanie did as told and Ghastly took the showerhead. He turned on the water and then rinsed her hair again, making it wet again. After a while he stopped and wrung out her hair, then he took the brush and tried again. It was still refusing.

Ghastly then started to comb the ends of her hair first and slowly worked himself up to her roots. Then he combed through them from start to end and they were smooth. The siblings were in awe. Ghastly used the wind to dry her hair.

“Better ?”, he asked kindly.

“Y-yes. Thank you, Ghastly. This was awesome.”, she said with a big smile.

M/n smiled at his Sister, but felt sad that he couldn’t do that. He is supposed to help her and keep her safe, yet he can’t even help her on a bad hair day.

“No problem.”, Ghastly said with a smile of his own.

“How did you learn that ?”

“I helped my Mother and some of my friends with longer hair before.”, Ghastly chuckled out.

“That is cool. You have to teach me that technique !”

“Sure.”

M/n left the Bathroom, very silent. It concerned his Sister, while Ghastly thought it was normal. They sat down on the table and Stephanie’s eyes lightened up.

“Pancakes ! Brother, you didn’t have to !”, she said happily.

“Shush and enjoy it. I felt nice today.”, he told her.

Something was off with the way he said it. It was meant to be a tease, but it sounded empty.

“You HATE Pancakes.”, she said.

“I don’t hate them, I just don’t like eating them too often.”, he argued back softly.

“Alright, spit it out, what is wrong ?”, she pressed.

M/n looked at her and sighed.

“Can’t we just eat first ? It’s silly, really.”, M/n asked.

“Say it now, or I will not eat.”, Stephanie threatened.

Ghastly and Skulduggery looked at M/n and Ghastly was concerned.

“It’s dumb, Sis. It’s one of these days again, where I am too emotional. I just feel stupid for not being able to get your hair done, like I usually always did and someone else had to do it. Like I said, it is dumb.”

M/n eyed his empty plate and Stephanie instantly caught on what M/n actually meant.

“You are ashamed that you hurt me and tried the old method that always worked before. You had no other idea what to do and you got so desperate to help me, that you let Ghastly help, hoping he can so something and as you saw what he did, it seemed so simple and you feel stupid for not knowing that. Is that it ?”, she asked.

M/n nodded.

“Don’t be ashamed, Brother. There are times and things, that you don’t have all the knowledge about. You can learn though. All you have to do is ask and you might get a small education about it. Also, you heard Ghastly. It wasn’t his first time, he had done that. Experience makes it happen.”

M/n looked up with a small smile.

“You’re right. Like I said, just a stupid day for me. Now enough depression, I wanna eat. I am starving to the bone.”, M/n joked.

Stephanie snorted and then giggled, while Ghastly needed a minute and then laughed. He looked at Skulduggery and knew it was a joke about him.

“I feel personally attacked...”, Skulduggery muttered.

Ghastly laughed more at that comment.

“What ? I don’t want to look as boney as you, Skulduggery. Would be a real shame if I end up all boned.”, M/n joked.

Stephanie laughed with Ghastly at that.

“Your jokes are so bad sometimes !”, Stephanie laughed out and took a pancake.

“Sissy, I read too many bone tickling jokes.”, M/n replied with shit eating grin, while he took a pancake too.

The two laughed some more, while Skulduggery muttered under his breath. Ghastly took a pancake too and they decorated it with whatever they had. Stephanie put Nutella on hers, Ghastly decided on some cinnamon and sugar, while M/n put sour cherry on his own.

M/n and Stephanie rolled their pancake together after that and then started to cut it up and stab the pieces with their forks, while Ghastly cut his big pancake and ate it.

“By the way...before we go to the Vault, I have an appointment with the Grand Mage and the Elders. So we have to go there, first.”, Skulduggery announced.

M/n swallowed his piece of food and groaned, then glared at the Skeleton.

“Are you for real ?! You tell us that NOW when Ghastly is already here and he probably didn’t plan the whole day to stay outside of his tailor shop ?! Are you kidding me, you old bone ?!”

Stephanie almost choked on her pancake. The last part was a joke and everyone got it, still, M/n was angry.

“I’m sorry. I wanted to tell you earlier, but I had other things to do.”

“Shove it, spooky scary Skeleton. Then scurry away, won’t ya ?”, M/n asked a bit annoyed.

“Well here is the issue...they want to meet you and your Sister.”

“Tell them we have no time right now.”, M/n told him.

“I can’t. They are my higher ups. I have to listen.”

“Say that my Sister is sick. We are not available.”

“Can’t. I am terrible in lying.”

“Corrupted, I don’t mind.”, Ghastly mixed himself in.

He looked at the tailor.

“But I mind it. I don’t know these people, that is the first thing ! The second thing is, that I don’t WANT to meet them. Who is telling me that they will be nice, huh ? Who is saying that they will listen, like you did ? I doubt it. I don’t want to meet them, nor am I willing to let them see MY Sister. They can shove it.”

“Corrupted...please ?”, Skulduggery asked nicely.

He was ready to say no again as Stephanie interrupted.

“We will go. Suck it up, Brother. Nothing bad will happen to us. I know you hate meeting new people so quick, but we will have to live with it, if we want to stay in this world.”, she told her Brother.

He scowled at her and shoved another piece of his pancake in his mouth.

“They hurt you, I will not hesitate to kill them.”, M/n said darkly.

Ghastly looked at Skulduggery in concern.

“He is overprotective of Family. They are informed of that. If they provoke him, I will not stop him.”, Skulduggery told his friend.

He nodded softly and they continued to eat.

-Time skip after they were done eating-

“Corrupted, girl ?”, Ghastly called.

They stopped their way to their rooms, to get dressed.

“Yes ?”, they asked at the same time.

Ghastly held out two bundles of fabrics.

“Your clothes.”, he told them softly.

They stared at the two piles he held.

“You got done THAT fast ?”, M/n asked in awe as he took his bundle.

“I did. It was urgent after all.”, Ghastly replied with a smile.

“Awesome. Thank you.”, Stephanie said and took her bundle.

“Yes...thank you.”, M/n said with a smile.

“No problem. Now put them on and let us go.”, Ghastly replied.

They ran off and changed their clothes. They came back out soon enough and M/n LOVED his clothes. He wore a dark blue pair of pants, his shirt was a rich forest green and his coat was night black, his boots were black and pretty too, everything fit perfectly too. But the best was that his coat was almost like a steampunk tailcoat, with an added, hidden hood on the back and deep pockets on the sides. His boots were in a gothic like style, HIS taste ! His pants were adorned with rivets on the sides and deep pockets on his sides and his knees. He LOVED it. Who would have thought that Ghastly was THAT creative ?

Valkyrie came out with her own clothes and she was dressed in all black and out of the same material, M/n wore, which they’ve never seen before. Her pants and blouse were beautiful and the little sleeveless vest, M/n guessed it was, with the silver hooks eyelets looked very elegant on her. Everything fit her beautifully and M/n smiled. She didn’t look at him yet.

She entered the living room and said that she loved the clothes and they fit perfectly. Then M/n stepped out. Stephanie turned around and her jaw practically dropped to the floor. She eyed her Brother up and down.

“How do you like your clothes, Corrupted ?”, Ghastly asked with a slight smile.

“You want my honesty or a lie ?”, M/n asked.

“Honesty, please.”

“I fucking LOVE them. I don’t think I will ever take them off again !”, M/n said with a big grin on his face.

“M/n...you look so fricking cool ! Now I feel underdressed...”, Stephanie said softly.

“Nonsense, Sissy ! You look awesome too.”

“You look like a Goth with dark colors.”

“Sis...I am a Goth. I love dark, powerful colors.”, M/n said with hesitation.

“Oh...Right.”, she muttered.

“I am working on a second pair of clothes too, for you M/n. Don’t worry. After all, you need two pairs. These clothes should make your skin and body significantly lessen outbursts of sweat and if you sweat, these clothes won’t smell so quickly like it.”, Ghastly explained.

M/n gave Ghastly a big smile.

“I fucking appreciate Skulduggery right now, that he let me meet you. You are a lifesaver, you know that ?”

Ghastly chuckled and gave the Teen a smile.

“You are welcome. Now let us go.”

M/n nodded at that.

M/n and Ghastly were in the Pontiac Firebird, which Ghastly complimented M/n about, while Skulduggery and Stephanie were in the Bentley. M/n followed the Bentley and soon enough they parked their cars and entered the wax museum. Skulduggery and Ghastly were masked again and Skulduggery paid for entry for all four of them.

M/n and Stephanie didn’t understand why they were there. Ghastly and Skulduggery waited until a small group of tourists left. And Stephanie only opened her mouth after they were out of sight and earshot.

“What do we want here ?”

“We want to go to the Sanctuary, the meeting place of the Elders.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Are the Elders out of wax ?”, she asked skeptically.

“I like coming here.”, Skulduggery said and too his sunglasses off, ignoring her question.

“It is so freeing here.”

Then he took the rest off and both siblings looked around nervously.

“One day you will get us in trouble.”, Ghastly scolded him.

They started to search for something on the wall and Skulduggery even cursed that they always change the location of it. Then the tourists came around the corner and M/n made a sound, which made both men freeze. An American boy left the group and came over, staring at Skulduggery.

“Who is that supposed to be ?”, he asked.

Stephanie hesitated and looked frequently for an answer, which M/n had.

“What ? You haven’t heard of Sammy the Skeleton Detective yet ? Nor of his accomplice, Jason Hans ? Sammy was the lousiest Detective in the world and his accomplice was way smarter than him. He solved a lot of cases for Sammy.”

“Never heard of them before.”, the boy replied.

He poked his finger into Skulduggery’s arm. Then he lost his interest and left with the rest of the group. Skulduggery turned around and looked at M/n.

“The lousiest Detective, huh ? And Jason was the smartest, huh ?”, Skulduggery asked.

M/n fought off the smile that wanted to come up and shrugged his shoulders. Skulduggery just grumbled good – naturedly, while Ghastly giggled. They continued their search and finally found what they were looking for. Ghastly pressed something in the wall and a part of it slid aside. Behind it was secret passage.

The siblings were in awe and Stephanie started to say that she couldn’t believe that it was always right under her feet, to which Skulduggery replied that she should get used to it. They entered and the wall slid shut, stairs that were lit by torches lid the way and they descended, the more they went down, the brighter the light got. They kept going until they arrived at a brightly lit lobby.

They entered. Marble and varnished wood paneling was in the room, no windows. Two men stood on the wall in the back, guarding, hands clasped behind their backs. They were dressed in grey clothes, wore long coats and some kind of helmet, the visor covered their faces and they both had scythes on their backs, a dangerous looking scythe blade on a one and a half meter long staff. A smaller man in a suit approached Skulduggery with Ghastly and greeted them.

“Mr. Pleasant, Mr. Bespoke. You came too early. The council is not gathered yet. I can show you to the waiting room, if you like.”

“I would rather use that opportunity to show our guests around a bit.”, Skulduggery replied.

The man blinked.

“I’m sorry, but the entry is only allowed to limited personal, as you know.”

“I only wanted to show my friends the repository. The book to be more exact.”, Skulduggery told the man.

“I understand. Well, as Administrator of the Sanctuary I would have to follow you, of course.”

“Of course, I insist on that.”

He bowed and then he led them away, they followed him. On their way they encountered even more of these grey clothed people. They scared Stephanie and M/n put and arm around her, to let her know that he will protect her.

“What are these ?”, she asked the two mages.

“Cleavers.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Security guards, law keepers and soldiers in one. Dangerous individuals. Be glad, that they are on our side.”, Ghastly said.

“Where are we going ?”, M/n asked softly.

“I want to show you both the book of names. Some claim, that the Ancients created it, but in reality no one knows, who made it or how it was made. It has all the names of the people of the world. The Given Names, the Taken names – if and when a name was taken again – and true names. Whenever a Baby is born, will a new name appear in it on another page. And when someone dies, disappears the name.”, Skulduggery explained.

“Then our true names stand in that book ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n got worried.

“Just like mine and from many others.”

“That is not dangerous ? Whoever gets their hands on that book, can rule over the world.”, M/n said worried.

“My god ! And I just found myself stupid, because I thought that !”

The Administrator looked over his shoulder while walking.

“Not even the Elders open the book, too big is its power and it can ruin your character so easily. But they don’t find any solution, to destroy it. It can’t be ripped apart, burned, it won’t let us destroy it with anything that we have in our possession. If the legends are true and the book was truly made by the Ancients, than it is only logical, that the Ancients can destroy it. The Elders see it as their task, to keep an eye on it and to protect it from curious eyes.”

M/n looked at him skeptical.

They arrived at a double door. The Administrator made a sign with his hand and the doors flew slowly open. They entered the repository, a big room with marble pillars, that, as Skulduggery said, keep some of the most rare and unusual magical aids inside.

Some items the Administrator introduced to the siblings. Soon enough they reached the middle of the room and it was pretty empty. There was only a standing desk and on it laid a book.

“That is the book of names ?”, she asked.

“Yes, it is.”, the Administrator confirmed.

“I imagined it bigger.”

“It is as big, as it has to be, not smaller and not bigger.”

“And you can just leave it there like this ?”, M/n asked skeptically.

“It is not as obvious as you might think. As it was brought here, the Elders raked their heads as to how to keep it safe. How was it supposed to be protected ? A lock can anyone break open. A wall can be torn down. A Safe can be cracked open.”

“Yes, so ? Then they decided to just leave it out here in the open ?”, Stephanie asked.

“No, they came to the most sophisticated protection mechanism that existed. Willpower.”

“Pardon ?”

“The book is protected from the Willpower of the Elders.”

M/n snorted.

“That is great and all, but here is MY question. What if someone murders the Elders ? Hmm ? What then ? The book is unprotected and then what will you do ? Cry about it ? This is the most stupid idea ever.”, M/n said out loud.

“That won’t happen.”

The Administrator turned to Stephanie.

“Try it out. Take the book.”, he said to her.

M/n covered her from the man’s sight, protectiveness taking over.

“Me ?”, she asked.

“Yes you. Don’t worry, Sir. Nothing bad will happen to her.”

She looked at Skulduggery, which M/n did too. He wanted to know if this was the truth. He gave them no help at all. She turned back around and stepped out from behind her Brother.

“What do you think, you are doing ?! What if he is lying and you get hurt ?!”, M/n yelled in a panic.

“Nothing will happen to her, Sir. No worries.”

She stepped closer and closer to the book, but with each step she took, the less she wanted to continue. And then at some point, she turned around and came back. The man looked at M/n.

“Your turn, Sir.”

M/n gulped. He knew that he was different from his Sister. What if that won’t work on him ? Oh god he will be a danger-

M/n took a deep breath and looked at the man.

“Not that I want that thing in the first place. But fine, I will entertain you.”, M/n said and then went for the book.

His steps were sure and steady. He came closer and closer and he didn’t feel any weaker in his mind. He got worried. He was almost there. He turned around and looked at the others. Ghastly looked worried, while the Administrator was waiting for any effect, which M/n didn’t have. Should he...reveal it ?

“Uhm...Mr. Administrator ? I still don’t feel any effect ? Is that bad or good ?”, M/n asked.

“You...don’t ?”, he asked.

“No...”

“Prove it. Touch it.”, he said, voice filled with worry.

M/n looked at Ghastly and Skulduggery, scared.

“D-do I have to ? I don’t want to alarm anyone.”, M/n said softly.

“Don’t worry, you said you don’t want it. Nothing bad will happen.”, Stephanie told M/n softly.

M/n gulped and turned back around.

“I am going to close my eyes, I don’t wanna see any names. It ain’t my business !”, M/n called.

Then he took the last few steps to the book and reached his hand out, touching it. He threw his head back and looked at the ceiling, then slowly lowered it, to look at the Administrator. He was in shock and horror.

M/n quickly took his hand away, wiped it on his pants, it felt wrong to have touched it, and ran back over.

“So...is that Willpower broken, or is that something with me, again ? Like the Reflection thing and the thing that China did and it didn’t work on me ? Skulduggery ? Say something, I am freaking out !”, M/n asked the Skeleton in a panic.

“Wait...the reflection and Miss Sorrow’s spell ? They didn’t deceive you ?”, the Administrator asked.

“No ? I saw a horrid thing that looked nothing like me as my reflection and as China used something weird on me and my Sister, she fell in love and I just wanted to get away instead. What does that mean ? Am I in trouble ? Oh god, please don’t lock me away. I don’t even want that thing.”, M/n said freaking out.

“We better don’t tell Meritorius about this. He would freak out for no reason. Corrupted doesn’t even want it, so it is better to not make it a big deal.”, Ghastly said softly.

“It felt wrong to touch it ! God, why did you want me to touch it ?! It felt wrong and disgusting !”, M/n cried out in panic.

Ghastly pulled M/n to himself and looked at the shocked Administrator.

“Let’s not freak out right now. We don’t make this official right now. Okay ? Give us all time, to recover for a bit. If anyone finds this out, Corrupted will be in big danger.”, he told the man.

He nodded and led them back up, into the waiting room.

“What does this all mean ? Am I dangerous ? Will I be killed ? Will I be hated ? Will I be locked away ? I’m sorry !”, M/n muttered into Ghastly’s chest in panic.

“Calm down, Corrupted. No one knows this yet and we need you to calm down. Take deep breaths.”

M/n did as told and soon was very calm. After that the Administrator came back and led them into a big oval room. Soon enough the doors opened and inside came an older man with white hair and a short cut beard. He was big, bigger than Skulduggery. His suit had the color of granite and Stephanie noticed the shadows on his right side. M/n did too and stepped further in front and then stretched a protective arm out and over his sister.

“I don’t like that shadow trick... Makes me think he wants to hurt my Sister...”, M/n muttered out.

“That is not Meritorius’s shadow.”, Skulduggery said softly.

The shadows seemed to be next to Meritorius and they stretched out, more shadows came from the walls. Then they lifted up from the ground all of a sudden and turned into an elderly woman in black. She walked next to the big man and her steps got slower, as they came closer. A third figure came from out of nowhere, suddenly and appeared on the other side of the man. They seemed a bit younger than the other two and they wore a sky blue suit and the jacket that stretched over the considerable belly.

The siblings looked at the Elders and the Elders looked at them.

“Skulduggery”, said the big grown man then, “Sailing in your wake but always followed by trouble, am I right ?”

“I wouldn’t say that they are sailing after me. It is more like, they are sitting around and wait until I arrive.”, he replied.

The man shook his head.

“And these two are your new partners ?”

“That’s right.”

“No taken name yet ?”

“No.”

“At least something.”

M/n scoffed silently.

“What is that supposed to mean ? That is not good, as much as I’ve heard. Not here.”, M/n said, threatened.

The man turned to them. He saw how M/n protected his Sister and was slightly surprised that he sounded threatened.

“The overprotective one ?”, he asked Skulduggery.

“Yes, and he is already agitated, so careful. He might bite otherwise.”, Skulduggery warned.

“Skulduggery, I swear, if that was a stupid joke, I will kick your boney ass later. My Sister. Anyone touches her, they will lose that very hand, they dared to touch her.”, M/n growled out, protectively.

Stephanie put a hand on her Brother’s shoulder, to calm him down.

“I’m fine, Brother. Don’t worry.”, she said softly.

“For the record, I do NOT trust any of you three, nor do I LIKE any of you.”

“Taken into account, young boy.”, the older male replied.

“My name is Corrupted. NOT young boy.”, M/n said darkly, glaring the mage down.

The man looked at him with wariness and understanding. M/n was VERY protective of his Sister, indeed.

“Let me introduce myself then, from a bit away from you two. My name is Eachan Meritorius. I am the Grand Mage of this council. Next to me you see Morwenna Crow and Sagacious Tome. I assume that you already have a Taken name, which is a shame. But tell me that your Sister has no intentions to stay here much longer and doesn’t want to involve herself into our business.”

“That won’t happen.”, she replied dryly.

“You see ?”, mixed Skulduggery himself in, “Defiant.”

M/n’s glare intensified.

“If you only dragged us here, to start this Bullshit again, Pleasant, then we will have a few bones to pick later, you hear me ? We told you multiple times, there is no way in HELL that we go back !”, M/n snarled.

“You were both in dangerous situations”, Meritorius continued looking at the two, “and you surely want to go back to the safety of your normal all day life, right ?”

“What is so safe there ?”, she asked the mage.

M/n continued to glare, but stayed silent for now, letting his sister speak.

“Ah, rebellious !”, Skulduggery said again.

“I am very close in punching his jaw in, Sister...”, M/n growled out.

She squeezed his shoulder.

“Calm down...”, she whispered.

Then she looked at Meritorius again.

“I mean it. We could be run over, by a car, tomorrow, when we cross the street. We could be attacked tonight. You are nowhere safe.”

Meritorius lifted an eyebrow.

“That all may be true, but in your normal life you never had to deal with Mages and murder plots.”

The other two Elders looked at them with interest.

“That may be, but I don’t think we can forget all of this so easily.”

“Stubborn.”, Skulduggery said, shaking his head in sadness.

M/n growled loudly. “Pleasant, shut the fuck up, before I punch you so hard that you will lose your jawbone ! You are NOT helping to ease the tension ! You are making it worse !”, M/n yelled angered.

#Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 7 – The Elders #skulduggery pleasant #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Working on corpses, a bit graphic, cutting bodies, mention of murder, cursing AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 10 – M/n’s Workplace

They arrived at Grimwood and M/n opened the second garage, for Skulduggery, to park his car in. M/n parked his own car in the main garage and then got out with Ghastly. They waited for Stephanie and Pleasant in the living room.

Soon enough they arrived.

“Follow me. Sister, you shut up about it, otherwise I will make you regret your life.”, M/n said, still a bit coldly.

She perked up that he even talked to her.

“Of course, Bubba. I...I owe you that much for my outburst earlier.”, she said softly.

“I told you, that it’s fine. Now let’s go. I am curious if they work.”, M/n said and then speed walked away.

The others followed and Stephanie was very confused, while Skulduggery turned his head to Ghastly in questioning.

“What is he talking about ?”, he asked the tailor.

“He said he bought something not long ago. Something that projects illusions over your body and makes you look different. He wants to try them out on us, so we can follow him.”

“Then I should call Kenspeckle.”, Skulduggery said.

“That you should.”, Ghastly agreed.

M/n stood in front of a wall and ran his hand over a certain area, then the wall slid to its right and a small entry was granted. He turned to the other three.

“Get in already. Down the staircase and open the big steel door.”, M/n instructed.

Skulduggery went in first, then Stephanie and Ghastly. M/n followed after them and closed the entrance. He pulled out his phone and turned on the flashlight, he gave it to Ghastly, who gave it Stephanie, who in turn gave it Skulduggery, to light the way.

“Why no Magic ?”, she asked.

“Because this is a house that is inflammable and I don’t want that.”, M/n answered.

“Oh...”

“Yeah, oh.”

Soon enough they reached the door out of steel and Skulduggery opened it. They entered the room and M/n turned on the lights. Stephanie’s and Ghastly’s eyes widened, in shock and awe. This was looking like a laboratory for everything that is technological.

On the left of the room were closets made out of steel, that raked up to the ceiling of the room, with big and many compartments, which had doors and keyholes, so they were locked too. On the right of the room were a lot of machine parts, big parts and two doors that led to god knew where. In the back in the center of the room, was a big desk. It was messy with papers, tools, screws and nuts. There was a small lamp too and a big, cold white glowing lamp in the middle of the ceiling too, illuminating the while room. It was beautiful and messy at the same time.

“Here I put all the stuff together, that I order from the industries.”, M/n explained.

“So you order all the things and just have to piece them together ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Yeah. It is like building Lego. You get a package, all the parts and a blueprint. All you have to do is put it all together and read the blueprint correctly. Easy.”, M/n said, shrugging his shoulders.

“Huh.”

M/n pulled, out of his pants pockets, a pair of keys and pulled out one of the many he had on the chain. He went to the closets and then they all saw him squinting. He grunted in frustration.

“Stupid eyes...”, he muttered under his breath.

He went to the desk, unlocked the left drawer on it and got out a pair of glasses. Then he went back to the closets and followed the labels with his finger, reading them all and that continued for a bit, until he found the right compartment. He unlocked it and got out two small, black, round buttons.

Ghastly and Stephanie looked at them bemused, while Skulduggery pointed at the items in his hands, with his head crooked to the side, letting confusion ebb in his voice.

“And these are supposed to hide our actual looks ?”

“Yes. Now don’t start crying and mocking them. These things are really good. I tried them out once, but I ain’t a Mage, nor am I a Skeleton, so we have to see how they work on you two.”, M/n said.

“You gotta be joking.”, Stephanie groaned.

“I am dead serious. Now, Ghastly, put one on your cheek and press this button.”, M/n instructed and pointed at a small button on the side of the big button.

Ghastly took one and looked at it in suspicion. Then he pressed it to his face and it surprisingly stayed on his left cheek, then he pressed the small button. It turned green slightly and in a flash an illusion fell over Ghastly.

Stephanie stared in shock at the tailor, while M/n smirked in triumph. The illusion was almost flawless. It leaked a few scars, nothing M/n can’t program. He turned to Skulduggery.

“Your turn.”, he said.

“Does it work ?”, Ghastly asked.

“Ghastly, you look almost like someone entirely else. Some scars are flickering through, but otherwise, it is a perfect disguise.”, Stephanie told him.

“A small issue, that, I can reprogram. No worries. This Baby will run perfectly, Ghastly.”, M/n said kindly.

Skulduggery did the same as Ghastly did and soon an illusion fell over the Skeleton, but it had a few flaws. One of his empty eye sockets glitched through and one of his hands was still bone. M/n clicked his tongue. He can fix that.

“Alright you two, leave them on and come with me. The red door is where we are going. Sis, you stay here.”, M/n said.

“Why ?”, she asked.

“Very tiny space.”

“Oh...”

“Yep. We’ll be back in a bit.”, M/n told her and then unlocked the red door.

He led the two men inside there and then entered himself, locking the door behind himself too.

“Welcome back, Corrupted.”, a robotic male voice answered.

“Hello, Iron. Did you miss me ?”, M/n asked.

“Very funny, Sir.”, the robotic voice replied dryly.

“Do we have to know who Iron is and were ?”, Ghastly asked worried, looking around everywhere.

“Iron is an AI that I created a while ago. He is mostly turned off and still in development, but until now, it is functioning just fine. Iron is my security system and my personal computer for a lot of things. He calculates everything flawlessly, to make sure I am making no mistakes, he calibrates all dangers, before I do something stupid and more. Don’t worry, he can only see us through a small camera, that can’t be hacked.”, M/n explained calmly.

“You made Iron ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“From scratch, yes. Without help.”, M/n confirmed.

“Starting all systems, Sir.”, Iron said.

The lights turned on and Ghastly and Skulduggery saw a lot of monitors and a big keyboard in the room. M/n sat down in his chair and then waited for the monitors to turn on, which they soon did.

“Thank you, Iron. I need the connections to the two buttons on the two males’ faces. As you can see, I need to reprogram and adjust them.”

“Of course, Sir. Starting search for Buttons...”

Soon they were shown on the monitors.

“Starting connection to their softwares...”

After a few minutes, they were inside their systems and M/n instantly got to work. Ghastly thought it was uncomplicated, but as he saw the strings of coding, he grew a bit dizzy. How did this Teenage boy handle all of that ?

Ghastly’s was the first one. The illusion flickered, got pulled and stretched, until everything sat perfectly and then the textures were changed. After he saved everything, Ghastly was stable. Then M/n went to Skulduggery’s illusion projector and did the same. After a while, the illusion sat and there was no glitching, flickering and buzzing anymore.

“Iron, save everything and then shut everything down.”

“Understood, Sir.”

With that M/n got up from his chair and walked over to the two disguised Mages. He smiled in triumph.

“You both will LOVE the designs.”, M/n stated proudly.

Then he unlocked and opened the door again, leading them out of the room. They spotted Stephanie and as she looked at the three, her jaw dropped in shock. M/n grinned.

“The blueprints and instructions really do wonders, when you understand them, eh, little Sister ?”, M/n asked teasingly.

“Are these two really still Ghastly and Skulduggery ?”, she asked her Brother.

“They are.”, M/n assured.

“Do we look that different ?”, Ghastly asked.

M/n chuckled, took off his glasses and then left their sides. The two men were too scared to face each other. M/n pulled out a big full body mirror from behind the left closet in the back. They looked and stared at their reflections in shock.

“What the...”, Ghastly started.

“Hell...”, Skulduggery ended.

M/n smirked proudly.

Ghastly had silver hair, his skin tone was lighter, his face had no scars and he actually looked handsome. He liked that face and smiled after his moment of shock.

Skulduggery had blond hair, his skin tone was almost like Ghastly’s just a bit darker, his face had no scars, but freckles here and there, his eyes were a soft green tone, his nose fit the face perfectly, it wasn’t too sharp, nor too round and it was all over his body, as he found out. He took off one of his gloves and even there he had skin and fingernails. It had been so long since he looked human...

Stephanie started at them and then at her Brother.

“You are a genius, you know that ? They look awesome !”, she said with a big grin.

“I know I am perfect. Thank you, Sister. I needed that Ego boost.”

She hugged her Brother tightly and he returned the hug.

“I...wow...this is amazing.”, Ghastly said in awe.

“Impressive...”, Skulduggery said in shock.

“Don’t get used to them. Remember, only 12 hours battery, then they need to be charged and that means you will have your old looks back. They aren’t made to hide your true selves from you. They are made for cases, such as this one. We go to my workplace, ask some questions, inspect the bodies if they are there and then leave. An undercover mission, nothing more.”, M/n reminded the two men.

Ghastly frowned at that reminder.

Yeah...not like he could keep that miracle and hide his scarred face... Would have been too good to be true...

M/n noticed Ghastly’s sadness instantly and tsked softly.

“Ghastly, just because you have a scarred face, doesn’t that mean, that you are ugly. In the end, looks don’t matter. It depends on who you are on the inside. If someone can’t see your worth on the inside, then they aren’t worth it. Trust me. You don’t look all that bad.”

“You think so ?”, Ghastly asked.

“I KNOW so. You are handsome in your own special ways. A face is only a small piece of the whole thing and almost unimportant. Personality counts. The person you are on the inside, is what counts. You could be the most handsome looking man, but with a disgusting personality or attitude, no one would want and love you. You get what I mean ?”

“I...I get it. Thank you, Corrupted.”

M/n smiled and patted Ghastly’s shoulder.

Then Skulduggery whipped out his phone and called someone. He left the room and went up the stairs as he talked with someone, while the other three slowly followed after the Skeleton.

“Now then...I need to make you fake IDs and then we should be alright.”

“What will be my name ?”

“Yuri. Yuri Jonathan.”, M/n told Ghastly.

“Skulduggery ?”

“Sammy Thorn. Cause he is a lousy skeleton and a thorn in my ass.”, M/n joked.

Ghastly chuckled.

“What about Kenspeckle ?”

“I’m unsure. Maybe Lucius Avery.”

“Your Sister ?”

“Lumi Jackson.”

Then Skulduggery came back to them in the hallway.

“Kenspeckle is coming, after a lot of convincing.”, he informed.

“Good.”, M/n replied.

Then he boy left and went to his own room, got out the things he needed and made the fake IDs for all four of them. After he was done with all four of them, the door was knocked on and Skulduggery let an older man inside, who seemed a bit grumpy. He seemed very untrusting to Skulduggery. Probably because he wasn’t a Skeleton anymore.

M/n smiled at the man kindly.

“Hello, you must be Dr. Kenspeckle Grouse. I made you all fake IDs, so you can get in, in case they will ask for IDs. My name is Corrupted. My Sister over there has not chosen a name yet.”, he introduced.

The older male looked at M/n with intrigue. He then stretched out his hand, for a shake. M/n gladly accepted and shook the man’s hand.

“That is correct. I am Dr. Kenspeckle Grouse. That sounds perfect. Then I think, you need this, right ?”, Kenspeckle asked and gave M/n a small picture of himself.

M/n took it and smiled brightly.

“Yes, thank you so much. With that we have a picture too, so we don’t have to worry, but we should disguise you a bit. I can alter the picture a little bit. Please follow me, Sir.”, M/n said.

He led Kenspeckle away and after a few minutes came back, with a man in white hair, blue eyes and he looked younger than he really was. He was in slight shock.

“Impressive, isn’t it ?”, Ghastly asked Kenspeckle with a smile.

“So it really was you two. Also an illusion, eh ?”, the older man asked.

“Yes, exactly.”, Skulduggery confirmed.

“Now we have to go. Everyone to the Pontiac Firebird. We are leaving.”, M/n said and led them all to the garage.

-Time skip-

They arrived at M/n’s workplace and he quickly led them all inside and ran to his Boss’ office with them. He knocked at the office door and a man opened it. He had a bald head, a small, yet neat black beard and dark blue eyes. He looked at M/n in shock and let him and the other four people inside.

“Corrupted, what are you doing here ? You have vacation.”, the man said.

“I’m sorry Boss, but I have a few questions. I got a visit at my house from two Detectives yesterday evening. They told me that two people went missing and they heard that I am a Coroner. They wanted me to ask, if you got any new people in here, in the last three days and if yes, if I can take a look at them. Apparently they suspect a murder on two men and I am known for my successful work. They introduced these three men to me and this girl is an apprentice of Mr. Avery. They are supposed to be my team and help me.”, M/n quickly explained in a big lie.

Skulduggery was impressed how flawlessly he lied.

The man stared at M/n in shock and then at the other four people. He sighed.

“I will need your IDs then.”, M/n’s Boss said softly.

They got out their fake IDs and gave them to him. The man checked them and then nodded and gave the IDs back to them, got up, opened the door and turned back to them.

“Follow me then.”, was all he said as he left.

The others followed him and M/n knew exactly where they are going. The mortuary room. As they entered it all, the four people, could see were big closet like things with big doors. Big compartments. The Boss of M/n went to the first few and pointed at them.

“These are the ones that came in recently and at the tenth door, the corpses of the past three days are over. I will clear out the room for you and sent the others on other tasks, so you have the room all to yourselves, Corrupted. Be careful and I hope you find, what you are looking for.”

“Thank you. Mr. Xavier.”, M/n thanked.

“You are welcome. Now I will be leaving.”

With that the man left and M/n got, out of a drawer, a pair of keys. He unlocked all ten doors, opened them and pulled out small platforms, where dead bodies laid on. Then he looked at Ghastly and Skulduggery.

“You know your small community best, so tell me who we are looking for.”, M/n demanded.

They looked over the ten corpses and soon enough saw two men. Two male Mages.

“I think that is them.”, Ghastly said and pointed at the two next to each other.

“That is them. They were known to be very good spies.”, Skulduggery confirmed.

“Alright, so number seven and eight are the ones. Okay. Ghastly get the cart over there, I will get the other one. I will put seven on your cart and eight on mine. Then you will follow me and we will start the inspection.”, M/n instructed quickly.

They jumped into action and M/n was quick to load the corpses on the carts. He led the four then to the laboratory that was a few steps away. Mr. Xavier stood in front of the closed doors of the lab.

“That’s them ?”, he asked.

“Yes, Sir. I am forbidden to share information with you. They said it was extremely important to only inform them, as they were from a secret organization.”, M/n informed.

“That is fine. You get such cases sometimes. Do what you have to and don’t tell me anything. Just tell me when you are finished and leaving.”

“I will, Boss.”

With that the man went out of their way and M/n rushed into the lab with the other four. As soon as the doors closed, M/n locked them and looked at them.

“Okay, we are inside and we have the bodies. Now we can work.”

“What are Skulduggery, your Sister and me going to be doing ?”, Ghastly asked.

“My Sister will listen to me and look away whenever I tell her to. You will take notes, Ghastly and Skulduggery can help a bit with giving tools. Maybe he will spot some things, which we, Kenspeckle and me, can’t spot.”

They nodded and M/n and Kenspeckle got out the tools, while he told his Sister to get out blank sheets of paper for Ghastly to write on and a pen. She rushed around and got him the things. He took them and then waited. The two Doctors prepared everything and then inspected the bodies from the outside first.

“Body eight has, some bruises on the left arm and chest. Seems like he was in a fight.”, M/n informed.

Ghastly noted it down.

“Body seven, scratch marks on the right leg, seems to be of fingernails and his right arm was burned.”, Kenspeckle informed.

“Which stage ?”, M/n asked.

“Second degree.”

Ghastly noted the information down. The two inspected the back too and saw that he must have slammed against something harsh. His back was showing bruises.

“Okay...let us check the eyes...”, M/n said.

Kenspeckle nodded and opened them. They had wide eyes as they saw the dead men’s eyes.

“What is it ?”, Ghastly asked.

“I....I’ve never seen this before...”, M/n muttered.

“Nor did I...”, Kenspeckle replied.

“What is it ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Their eyes are filled with black. No speck of white or anything. They are utterly black.”, M/n answered.

“We need to run tests on that.”, Kenspeckle told M/n.

“I know that.”, he replied dryly.

He was not amused to run tests on eyes... Kenspeckle carefully removed the eyes and put them on a small sample glass. M/n took one of each from him and then they went to inspect it closer with the Microscope. Skulduggery stood behind M/n and looked over his shoulder at the eyes.

“I fear we have to cut one of the eyes open and see if the black spread in there.”, Kenspeckle stated.

“What would that mean, if it spread ?”, M/n asked the Doctor.

“It would mean that Necromancy was used on them.”, he answered.

“Oh...Oh yay...”, M/n mumbled out unamused.

#Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #skulduggery pleasant #male!reader #derek landy #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #Stephanie Edgley #Part 10 – M/n’s Workplace

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Mention of corpses, cursing, mention of murder, insulting AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

Part 4 – China Sorrows

“Samples ?”, Stephanie asked as they followed Skulduggery to his car.

M/n looked at her and sighed.

“Well, please don’t tell Mom...”, M/n begged.

“Don’t tell her what ?”, she asked suspiciously.

“Sis...I am not working as a Marketer. I am a Coroner. I work with corpses.”, M/n admitted.

She stared at him in shock.

“And Mom doesn’t know ?!”, she yelled.

“No, only Uncle G knew, because he paid the schooling for me.”

She had a wide open mouth at that, gaping at her Brother in utter shock. All this time, her Brother worked on corpses and murder cases !

“That’s so cool ! I will not say anything. But expect blackmail.”, she said then.

“Of course you would use it as blackmail...”, M/n sighed with a grin.

Then they arrived at the Detective’s car and M/n gasped, already starting to gush about the model he saw in front of him.

“No way is that a 1954s Bentley R-Type Continental !”, he yelled in excitement.

“It is.”, Skulduggery said with a smile in his voice.

“What is so special about it ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n turned to her with big eyes of excitement.

“This model was only made to the number of 208 examples ! It has a six cylinder with a 4,5 liter engine too !”, M/n gushed.

“I let a few things be added into it too. I added a Central locking system, air conditioning, navigation system and other modern amenities.”, Skulduggery told M/n.

He was bouncing on his feet, in excitement.

“I will never understand your craze for cars...”, Stephanie muttered.

“Sissy ! I only am crazy for OLD cars ! I LOVE them ! They look cool and not as stupid as the cars nowadays !”, M/n whined at her.

“What is wrong with the cars nowadays ?”

“Everything ! Even the smallest issue, you can’t fix yourself anymore, you need a garage for that and pay a huge amount of cash, for a small thing ! They all look the fucking same and they all don’t have sharp edges anymore ! All the corners of the cars, nowadays, look like someone licked on them until they were round ! Eww !”, M/n complained.

Then he pointed at the Bentley.

“This car was rare and hard to get, thanks to the limited amount of its kind ! And, to make it even better, it was one of the very FEW cars that looked good with round edges ! Also, the engines had more space in old cars. They had longer snouts not as small as nowadays and nothing was all somehow forced inside there. Everything had space.”, M/n added.

(For people who want to know what that car type looked like...)

“Is that why you begged to have that Firebird ?”, she asked.

M/n looked at her offended.

“ ‘That Firebird’ ?”, he scoffed as he repeated her.

“Firebird ?”, Skulduggery asked interested as he unlocked the car.

“I call dips !”, Stephanie yelled and took the passenger seat.

M/n took the back and Skulduggery got inside in the driver’s seat. M/n buckled up and then pouted.

“What Firebird ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“She meant my 1977 Pontiac Firebird Trans Am Y82. MY car, that is currently unavailable.”, M/n answered.

“I haven’t seen one in a long while. I might want to see it one day.”

“Sure. I will probably work with you a few times, for information exchange, so you have a high chance to see it one day.”

Then Skulduggery started the engine and they drove off. It didn’t take long and they were on a road, which M/n and Stephanie didn’t know existed. So M/n asked him how he knew.

“I visited Gordon often, so I drove around here a lot and I know every corner here.”, he answered.

“Huh. That explains it...”, M/n said in thought.

As they drove past a sign that told them the direction to Haggard, Stephanie considered to just ask him to get her home, but she refused and shook the thought away quickly. That would mean that she can forget all of this. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity !

“Where are we going ?”, she asked.

“The City. I have a meeting there with an old friend. Maybe she can shed some light on the recent events.”

“Why were you here ?”, she asked.

“Pardon ?”

“Tonight. Not that we aren’t grateful that you were, but why were you near us ?”, she asked.

“Ah, that question had to come.”

“And will you answer it ? I don’t think you just came for M/n’s reports, for whatever reason you had to get these.”

Now that M/n thought about it, he sounded ready to come over anyways. Stephanie was right, there was more to this...

“I rather not answer that.”, Skulduggery said.

“And why ?”, she pressed.

He turned his head slightly into her direction. It looked like he had them both in his sight, with the street included.

“The less you two know about all of this, the better. You two are very normal children and tomorrow you go back to your very normal lives. It wouldn’t be good, if you two get even deeper involved with this.”

“But we already are deeply involved.”, Stephanie argued back.

“But we can limit the involvement.”, Skulduggery countered.

“But I don’t want to.”, she said.

M/n just watched, amused.

“But it is the best for you and your Brother.”

“But I don’t want that !”

“But it could-“

“No more sentences with ‘buts’ !”

“Okay, I’m sorry.”

M/n laughed at that.

“You two argue like long best friends. It is really funny.”, he chuckled out.

“Hah. Hah.”, she replied in sarcasm.

Then she turned back to Skulduggery.

“You can’t seriously expect us, that we forget all of this, just like that. We saw how magic was used, we saw the fire and YOU ! And we have heard about the war, from which no one taught us in school. We saw a world, from which we didn’t even know, existed.”

“Don’t you want to go back to your normal life ? It is less dangerous.”

M/n scoffed.

“Says who, Pleasant ?”, he asked the Skeleton.

“I don’t belong there.”, Stephanie stated.

“Nor do I. I feel so out of place in my ‘normal’ life. I am just very smart and no one else is. I feel like I never even dug deep enough to discover what else I can learn, that interests me. Magic does. It did since I was a small bean with the age of 6 years. Now I know it is out there, so why not LEARN about it ?”, M/n added.

Skulduggery turned his head completely to her and crooked his head to his side.

“Curious. Your Uncle said the exact same thing as I met him the very first time. Even more curious is that Gordon did tell me, that you, M/n, will want to join the world of mages as soon as you know it exists.”

Then Stephanie asked him if the things, Gordon wrote about, were true about the world of mages, at which M/n only laughed.

“I don’t think he did ! A lot of mages would have came after him, if that were the case. No, no, no. But he told me a few things about the world of mages, I think. I was never allowed to talk to anyone about it and I had to make a pinky promise. Never talked about it.”, M/n said proudly.

“You are probably right...”, she muttered.

“He got inspired by them, but he changed everything so much, so he didn’t embarrass anyone and he didn’t get hunted down or even killed for it. Your Uncle was a very great man, really. We solved many cases together.”, Skulduggery said.

“Really ?”, M/n and Stephanie asked.

M/n was in awe and excitement.

“Oh yes, you can be proud, to have had an Uncle as him. Of course I was involved in many fights, because he dragged me somewhere and just wouldn’t stop to get on other people’s nerves, but...we had fun. A lot of fun.”

M/n smiled saddened at that. He wished he knew.

The drive was very quiet after that, until the lights of the City appeared in front of them. The City was quiet and the streets almost empty. They drove onto a small parking lot, Skulduggery turned off his engine and looked at Stephanie and M/n.

“You two stay here.”, he instructed.

“Okay.”, the two replied.

Skulduggery got out of the car and not even two seconds later did the siblings also get out of the car. They didn’t tag along just to stay in the car. They wanted to see what else the world had to offer for surprises.

“Stephanie, M/n, I’m having doubts, that you respect my authority.”, the Detective said.

“Well, we don’t.”, Stephanie answered.

“You have to earn my respect, like anyone else. And that takes a while.”, M/n replied.

“Oh...well then.”

He put his hat back on and wrapped his scarf around his chin, the wig and sunglasses, he left out though. He pressed on the remote on his keychain, it beeped and the car doors locked themselves.

“That’s all ?”, she asked.

“Steph, not everything can be magical. That would be obvious.”, M/n said softly.

“What your Brother just said.”, Skulduggery agreed and then started to walk away.

They hurried to keep up with him.

“But you do magic from time to time, right ?”, she asked.

“Sometimes. Although, I am trying recently, not to depend on Magic all that much, I’m trying to deal with most of the issues, with what is in there.”, he answered and tapped his skull.

“There is empty space.”

M/n started to laugh at that.

“Yes, but you know what I mean.”, he replied a bit agitated.

“What else can you do ?”, she asked.

“Pardon ?”, the Detective replied.

M/n calmed down with his laughter and looked at them. He liked to be in the background. That way he was rarely noticed and he liked it that way. After all...he had bad memories of the few times he was in the spot light...

Mostly he got bullied, for being smarter, than anyone else in his school and for finishing his scholar ship and for starting work so early and all that. Whenever he was in the spot light, he was mocked, insulted, pushed around and bullied. He liked staying in the back and not draw too much attention to himself.

“Something, that has to do with Magic. Show me something.”, Stephanie said interested.

“What – a living Skeleton isn’t enough for you ? You want more ?”, he asked.

If Skulduggery would have had eyebrows, M/n bet, he would have raised them.

“Yes. Teach me something.”

He shrugged with his shoulders and looked at M/n.

“You too, M/n ?”

The boy was surprised that he was asked and involved too. He wasn’t used to people paying much attention to him. He nodded with a gleam of excitement in his eyes.

“Alright then...I don’t mind. I think it won’t hurt to do that. Two different kinds of Magic exist. The Alchemists do sorcery in one way, the Elemental mages do it differently. The Alchemists are more aggressive, their techniques show faster effects. The Elemental mages in comparison, I am one of them, chose the less spectacular way and make an effort, to control the Elements better.”

“To rule over the Elements ?”, Stephanie asked.

“That is a little bit exaggerated. We don’t rule over them, we manipulate them. We influence them.”

“You mean Earth, Wind-“

“Water and Fire. Exactly.”

“Show me, how.”

Skulduggery crooked his head a bit to his right side and the siblings could hear, that he had fun with this, as he “Fine then” said and he held his open hand out, towards her. She frowned, wondered, why she suddenly was freezing, and only then realized, that a drop of water ran over her face.

She looked to M/n and he was just as much, having small drops of water on himself, but he didn’t seem to freeze.

In the next second were, both of their hair, completely soaking wet, as if they just came out of the water with their head after a dive in it.

“How did you do that ?”, she asked as she shook her head and water drops flew in all directions.

“Hey !”, M/n protested loudly as he got most of them in his face.

He glared at his Sister.

“Biatch, I am standing right BEHIND you ! Stop spraying me even more wet than I already am ! I don’t want water from your greasy hair in my face !”, he yelled childishly.

“To your info, I showered yesterday ! When did you shower, huh ?!”

“Yesterday ! A whole damn stinky, rotting corpse fell on top of me, so I HAD to shower quickly ! It REEKED and had MAGGOTS, YUCK !”

At that Stephanie felt sick and gagged.

“Ewww !”

“Thank you ! Your sympathy is greatly appreciated !”, M/n said with a grin, knowing she didn’t feel bad for him.

Skulduggery chuckled at their playful banters.

“Anyways...I’m gonna guess how he did it. He manipulated the humidity. Which means he did Water.”, M/n said with a smart, know it all, grin.

He looked at M/n.

“Very good. That is correct.”, he praised, impressed.

“The first Element was water. We can’t split the Red Sea or something like that, but we have a little bit of influence about it.”

“Show me that with the fire again.”, Stephanie said.

“I am wet...Couldn’t have anyone told me that I am getting a shower for free ? I would have brought soap, towels and new clothes for that.”, M/n whined playfully.

Skulduggery chuckled. He snapped his gloved hands and sparks flew, he formed a fist and the sparks became a flame and he held the fireball in his hand, while they continued to walk.

The fire burned brighter and she felt, how her hair slowly dried.

“M/n, come over here, I’m drying you off.”, Skulduggery said.

M/n went next to his Sister and sighed as he started to feel himself getting dry.

“Wow.”, Stephanie said.

“Exactly. Wow.”, Skulduggery replied.

“Awesome. Thank you.”, M/n said, relieved.

“Were you cold ?”, she asked.

“Steph...I am a fucking AC no matter the temperature. I don’t sweat in summer and I don’t warm up in the winter, yet barely feel the cold. I wasn’t cold, I was just uncomfortable with my hair sticking to my head, face and neck. It is a disgusting feeling.”

“Ah- I forgot...”, she muttered.

“No shit, Sherlock...”

Skulduggery shook his head in amusement. They like to talk to each other in sarcasm and to roast each other. Gordon really knew them very well.

He threw the fireball into the air, with one quick hand movement and the siblings watched as it started to burn out in the night, until there was nothing to see anymore.

“Nice firework. The boom was missing though.”, M/n said jokingly.

Skulduggery laughed.

“Why thank you, but unfortunately I don’t want to draw attention to us.”, he replied to M/n.

“I had a feeling that was it.”

“What about earth ?”, Stephanie asked.

Skulduggery shook his head.

“You don’t want to see that and hopefully you never will have to see that. The earth power is a pure defensive story and is only allowed to be used at extreme emergencies.”

M/n was confused and concerned at that statement. Was it that big of a deal ?

“So...no stomping with your foot and making an earth quake, to destabilize your enemy ? That doesn’t exist in earth magic ?”, M/n asked.

“No it doesn’t.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Oh man... Earth is supposed to be cool and then you hear that it is the most useless power...”, M/n said saddened.

“It’s not useless-“

“You are not allowed to use it, besides it is an emergency case. Of course it is the most useless then.”, M/n interrupted the Detective with a pout.

Skulduggery was silent at that. He had to agree with M/n at that one. It DID sound the most useless ability. You have it at your disposal, but because of what it can only do, it is forbidden to be used.

“What is the strongest Element ? The fire ?”, Stephanie asked after a while.

“That is the most noticeable, that gets all the ‘Wows’, but you would be surprised what a bit of air can do, if you displace it correctly. Displaced air doesn’t easily disappear, there must be a place, where you can push it to.”

“Can we see it, once ?”

They reached the end of the parking lot and walked past a low wall, which surrounded it. Skulduggery pressed his fingertips on the ball of his hand, spread then his fingers and did a fast movement from his wrist in the wall’s direction. The air shook and the bricks flew onto the sidewalk. Stephanie and M/n stared at the brand new hole in the wall.

“I knew it ! Air is the best Element you can have !”, M/n cheered.

“Man, is that cool.”, Stephanie said in amazement.

As they continued to walk, she turned back around a few times to look at the wall again.

“What about the Alchemists ? What can they do ? Are these those people you watch in Ninjago ? One can do shape shifting, the other copy magical abilities and the other can use nature to his own needs ?”, M/n asked in excitement.

Skulduggery looked at M/n as he asked that.

“Ninjago ?”

“Lego Ninjago is still my favorite Series. I watched all seasons and they also have Magic, but they call it Elemental Powers. And they are all called there Elemental Masters.”, M/n shortly explained.

“Huh. Never heard of it before.”

“It is a great Series. Steph watched it with me a lot too. I guess I am a person that will never grow too old for children series and Movies. I hate news and other stuff. All I like is Comedy, children stuff and some murder series, like Navy CIS, Bones, Castle and Death in Paradise. News are boring and my Mom keeps me updated anyways. The reporters just babble too much in my opinion.”

“That is a lot.”

“Meh, Uncle said it was way too little stuff that I liked. Now, are Alchemists like that ?”, M/n asked.

“Kind of. I met a shape shifter and someone who could read your mind.”

“So cool ! I have decided, I wanna stay here ! This is EXACTLY my world ! I always wanted to be around Magic and work with it !”

‘Oh dear, what have I done ? Gordon you would kill me...’, Skulduggery thought.

Stephanie looked at her Brother and then had a grin on her face.

“Which one is more powerful ? An Alchemist or an Elemental mage ?”, she asked Skulduggery.

M/n scoffed.

“I bet it is Elemental. I mean come on ! They have FOUR different Elements they can use, while Alchemists just have ONE, as it sounds.”

“Actually, it depends on the mage all alone. An Alchemist can have so many tricks up his sleeve, so many different abilities, that he can be stronger in the end than the strongest Elemental mage. That has been proven.”

M/n stared at Skulduggery with a wide open mouth.

“B-but, Elementals have FOUR Elements to control ! FOUR ! How is an Alchemist with just ONE power, better than YOU ?!”

“They concentrate more on their one power and are more aggressive with it than Elementals are. It gives them a slight advantage.”

“Was the sorcerer Mevolent ? The strong Alchemist ?”

“No, Mevolent was an Elemental. It is rather rare, that an Elemental is choosing such deviations, but it happens.”

“How do you know, if you can do sorcery ? Can anyone learn it ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n knew that she wanted to know it badly, but played it off as if that thought just crossed her mind.

“Not anyone. In fact just very few can learn sorcery.”, Skulduggery answered.

“They usually then gather at one location, so that there are, over the whole world, little groups, of sorcerers. In England and Ireland, as example, exist eighteen districts, in which only sorcerers live.”

“Can you also be a sorcerer, without knowing it ?”

M/n was concerned at that question. Skulduggery told them that it is most definitely possible. And Stephanie was saying it was sad, while he found it amusing. M/n scoffed.

“Sure it is very funny, to know that there are more mages out there, most possibly, and they never knew that they could have helped two worlds, mostly when it is people that just KNOW that they don’t belong and most likely decide to do suicide because of it, because they FEEL that something is missing, but never could find out WHAT was missing. Very funny. To die for.”, he told Skulduggery with a slightly agitated tone.

“Alright, when you put it THAT way, it isn’t that funny anymore.”, Skulduggery said softly.

“Because it isn’t ! Parents lose their own children out there and who knows why ! Many do it because they KNOW something is missing in their life ! What if it was a mage, that never knew, because no one could help them ?! Not every child that killed themselves did it from depression ! Seriously, and mages find it FUNNY ?!”, M/n raged.

“Brother, calm down.”, Stephanie said calmly.

M/n took deep, calming breaths.

“I am calm. But it is WRONG to find it funny, that people take their lives and die, never knowing that they could have changed the world. That they were maybe missing the world of mages. Who knows ? Maybe mages, that don’t know that they are mages, feel a certain emptiness and that means that their world is calling for them. They just can’t pick up on it.”

“I never thought about it in that way.”, Skulduggery admitted.

“Hah. Maybe you should.”

Soon enough they entered a story building and climbed stairs up. They followed Skulduggery until they stopped at a door that read ‘Library’. He knocked on that door and then waited.

“By the way: Even if you want to do it badly, don’t tell her, under any circumstances, your names.”, Skulduggery warned.

They nodded in understanding and then the door opened. They were let in by a man that seemed to be a bodyguard. They went inside and followed behind Skulduggery, who followed the man, for a while, until they spotted a female. The woman had raven black hair and water blue eyes. Then the woman smiled and Stephanie started to feel warm and welcomed, while M/n looked very uncomfortable.

Stephanie wanted nothing more but to be next to this woman, while M/n wanted to be as far away from her as possible.

“Leave it be.”, Skulduggery warned.

The woman looked at him and her smile became mocking. Stephanie stared at her delighted.

“Leave it be.”, Skulduggery repeated, firmer this time.

The woman laughed and shrugged her shoulders, but before she could say anything M/n smacked the back of his little Sister’s head, which she hissed softly at.

“First off: Hell no, little Sis. Second off: She is way too old for you. Third off: You are too young for a relationship. And fourth off: I don’t like her.”, he whispered to her.

“You didn’t fall for it ?”, Skulduggery asked M/n in surprise.

“No. Whatever it was, I didn’t get influenced. And thank fuck for that. She made me VERY uncomfortable though. I do NOT like her. Whatever she tried on me and succeeded to do to my Sister, she better shoves it up her ass for the next time, otherwise I will do something drastic about it.”, M/n said and growled at the woman.

The woman stared at him in shock. M/n put a protective arm around his little Sister, death glaring the woman.

“I’m sorry. I tend to forget, what influence, I have on humans. The first glimpse and all...”, the woman said with a slight bow.

“It seems to me, that you forget that every time, when you meet someone knew.”, Skulduggery accused.

“What can I say ? I am muddle – headed.”

Skulduggery turned to Stephanie.

“Don’t be embarrassed. Everyone, that meets China for the first time, fall for her. But believe me, the effect will wear off, the more you get to know her.”

“It will get weaker, but never fully stop. Right, Skulduggery ?”, the woman, China, asked.

M/n didn’t like what this China was referring to. He didn’t even like her, this close, to them. The Detective took off his hat, but didn’t answer her question.

“If you tell me, that you fucked this woman at some point, I will gag and vomit into your Bentley, Skulduggery. She ain’t even that pretty. She is more creepy than anything.”, M/n whispered to him, so the woman doesn’t hear him.

Skulduggery looked at him. M/n wasn’t sure, but he guessed that he was surprised.

China smiled at Stephanie, which M/n already hated, and she gave her an eggshell colored business card, on which stood a telephone number in elegant handwriting.

“Call me, if you stumble over any books or something, from which you believe, could interest me. In the past Skulduggery did that too. Nowadays not anymore. I fear, too much water has flown down, the proverbial creek. But where are my manners ? I’m China Sorrows, my Dears. Just call me China. And you two are ?”

Before Stephanie could answer, M/n stepped in.

“Her name is ‘non of ya business’, Toots. My name is ‘Joe Mama’. Now step away from me and my Sister. Ever heard about personal space and the five foot distance rule, Miss manners ?”, M/n growled out protectively.

China looked at M/n in shock and then stepped away from them. Five feet, while Skulduggery chuckled at M/n’s attitude. He really hated China.

“He is very overprotective. I rather not provoke him, China.”, Skulduggery said amused.

“I have realized.”, she muttered.

“You look almost, like that one Bitch that tried to sexually assault me, three times, in school. Be glad I just want you five feet away and not in the trash can.”, M/n growled out darkly.

“You were almost assaulted, three times ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“The whore wanted badly into my pants. She even wanted to force my family, to make me marry her, with 10 years of age. I was almost out of school too. Uncle said he took care of her. No idea what happened to her, but she just disappeared after that, luckily. That hoe was at least 7 years older than me too.”

Stephanie looked at her Brother in horror.

“Why didn’t you tell me that ?!”, she yelled.

“Because you were too young to understand. You were only six years old, Sis. You didn’t have to know.”

“What a bad woman...”, China scoffed.

M/n glared at her.

“You were no different near my Sister right now. Just keep your distance.”

Skulduggery sighed and then snapped China’s attention back on him.

“They are witnesses of how someone broke into Gordon Edgley’s estate. The intruder searched for something. What could Gordon have had, that someone wanted badly ?”

“You don’t know who it was ?”, China asked the Skeleton.

“Who the man was, is not important to me. I’m only interested to find out, who his Master is.”

“And who, do you think it is ?”

The Skeleton was silent and China laughed.

“Again Serpine ? Darling, to you, Serpine is practically responsible for every Crime.”

“Because it is exactly that.”

“Then why are you coming to me ?”

“You hear a lot.”

“Really ?”

Skulduggery asked her if China heard anything at all, and she replied that it wouldn’t be anything helpful, just some Bullshit she heard. After he pressed at that matter, she told him that she heard that Serpine was doing research about some Sceptre of the Ancients and that he was actively looking for it, apparently. He said it was just a fairytale, which already made M/n think that he might be wrong.

Then they were talking about what Gordon could have had, that someone wanted to steal. China said that, that is probably not the right question, he should find an answer to and he seemed to understand exactly what she meant. In M/n’s head it clicked, meanwhile Stephanie asked what that meant, on which Skulduggery just said that it isn’t important what they wanted to steal, but what they wanted to have, that Gordon had to die for it first.

China explained then, that there are objects, which, can only be used and taken away from the previous owner, when they are dead.

“So like in Harry Potter and the deathly hallows ? Where Voldemort had a wand that he thought belonged to him only, but that wasn’t the case, the previous owner still was alive and with that its loyalty didn’t belong to him. There was the big rumor that the previous owner had to die for the wand to switch owners, but that was wrong, they just had to deweaponized them, which Voldemort didn’t know, and then he killed the person, he thought killed the previous owner. But it wasn’t Snape who owned the wand’s loyalty, it was Draco Malfoy and after he was deweaponized by Harry Potter, it belonged to Harry. Snape killed Dumbledore, who had the wand first, but Malfoy deweaponized Dumbledore, so he was the next owner. Does this make sense ? In order to get some objects, you have to either kill someone, wait for them to die or even deweaponize them, before you can own it and the loyalty of the said object ?”, M/n asked.

All three of them stared at him.

“What ?”, M/n asked.

“You understood all of this, just from a Movie ?”, China asked.

“Yeah ? I am smart, after all. I was a Potter Fan for a while, until it died out. Can’t stand the Movies anymore.”

“Impressive. But yes, that is how this works.”, Skulduggery said.

“Well, fuck me then. This doesn’t sound like it’s gonna be an easy case.”, M/n said and slumped his shoulders.

Skulduggery turned back to China and asked her to inform him if she knows anything or heard anything that might help. In which she asked what she’d get in return.

“If this all involves my Uncle, and you decide to not say anything, and I will find out about it, I might beat your sorry ass, woman. I might look like a weakling, but I can whoop ass. I will NOT hesitate. I beat a mage tonight already, I am not afraid to do it again. You get in return, a free evening and no ass whooping, how about that ?”, M/n snarled.

She looked at M/n and then at Skulduggery.

“He did that ?”

“Yeah, he was ready to kill.”

“He woke up and chose violence today.”, Stephanie replied.

They all looked at her and M/n scoffed then mumbled stuff under his breath.

After that they left, Stephanie switched and this time she sat in the back and he in the passenger seat, M/n looked at his watch, then choked on his breath.

“SHIT !”, he yelled.

“What is it ?!”, Stephanie yelled in the car, while Skulduggery stayed calm.

“I have to get my car soon ! I can’t come home too ! I will miss the agreed upon timing to get my car and pay for the repairs ! They are always so busy and full ! It will take me hours to get my car, if I come later !”, M/n complained, stressed.

“I can just drive you there.”, Skulduggery offered.

“You’d do that ?”

“Of course.”

“Great ! Thank you !”

“No problem.”

M/n told Skulduggery the address and he drove them there. As they drove, Stephanie asked more questions about Serpine and other things, M/n only listened partly to the conversation. He had a bad feeling.

“Guys ?”, he said softly.

They went silent.

“Yes, M/n ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“I have a VERY bad gut feeling.”

“Why ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n looked around in the car and waited for something to appear. Then it happened.

“WATCH OUT !”, M/n screamed as he saw the car, without headlights, driving straight at them.

He took the wheel from Skulduggery and forced himself on top of the Skeleton and hit the gas, quickly shifting gears, to avoid getting hit. The headlights were turned on, suddenly, but M/n couldn’t care less if he was blinded, it was a straight road and the fucker came from Skulduggery’s side.

He was quickly in the fourth gear and was out of the way as the car drove down the road and into the mud. M/n’s adrenaline was way too high for him to register, that they weren’t chased anymore. So he continued to drive fast for a while, until he was calm enough to look into the mirrors and see no one following. He halted the car and then carefully went back into his own seat.

He was still pale, but he was calming down. Then he felt sick and slammed open the door of the Bentley, ran a bit away and started to vomit. Skulduggery and Stephanie got out as well. She was worried for her Brother, while Skulduggery was impressed with his reflexes.

“M/n, are you alright ?”, she asked her older Brother.

“Never been-“, he vomited again, “...better....”, he finished bemused.

“Who was that Freak ?”, she asked.

“The same guy, that intruded our house.”, M/n answered softly as he wiped his mouth clean with a tissue.

He looked at his Sister and then he froze.

“This isn’t over yet...”, he muttered in panic.

“What do you mean ? Your gut ?”, Stephanie asked worried.

M/n nodded.

“I feel watched too...”

Then there was a yell and it was the man again, with a few scars. M/n dodged him and punched him in the jaw.

“CAR ! NOW, SIS !”, M/n yelled.

She refused to do so. She tried to find out what she could do to help. Then she looked at Skulduggery.

“He seems to be immune to fire, could that mean he is specifically trained on that element alone ?”

“Yes, why ?”

“Water puts out fire. What if...”

“Water hurts him ?”, Skulduggery asked.

She nodded.

“Worth a try.”, Skulduggery said, shrugging his shoulders.

M/n landed a mean kick against the man’s shin, who screamed in pain at that.

“Just leave us the fuck alone you fucking creep ! Go back to your Master and live out your Master/Slave kink there, won’t you ?! Fucking curl up in a corner and die already !”, M/n screamed in frustration.

“Your Brother has a mouth...”

“No one ever could make him stop from cursing when he was pissed off or protective.”, she replied to Skulduggery.

Skulduggery then manipulated the humidity and water rained onto the attacker and M/n. The man started to scream in pain and, as the water became more and more, the man started to fall into pieces, right in front of M/n. He jumped back and just watched as he died, just like that.

After he was dead and only remains were left, M/n puked again.

“M/n ?!”

“Anxiety kicked in ! I’m fine !”, he replied to his Sister.

Skulduggery turned to Stephanie.

“Good thinking there.”, he praised her.

“Yeah, great thinking, Sis...”

After that, they got back into the car and Skulduggery arrived at the car dealer, whose garage was working on M/n’s car. He got out and said his bye to Skulduggery and Stephanie.

“I will visit a friend later, if you want, you and your sister can tag along.”, Skulduggery offered.

“Are you sure ? As we drove, you were very hell bent, to leave it at a onetime only thing.”, M/n asked.

“I have a feeling you two have a very good feeling, in this kind of work.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Well then, sure !”, M/n replied.

“I will join too !”, Stephanie replied as she took back the passenger seat.

“Alright then. Until later, M/n.”

“Until later, Skulduggery, Steph.”

Then they drove off and M/n waited for the garage and car dealer to open up, which was any minute now.

‘Just pay for the car, take it and drive home, then work on stuff until Skulduggery comes and picks you up.’

Masterlist HERE !

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 4 – China Sorrows

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

WARNING!: Cursing, Name calling, Creep behavior, Protective Reader, blood and gore, Violence AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!

Part 2 - Danger

M/n was at his workplace, in the lab. He was looking some substance up in his microscope.

‘This is...weird...’

M/n took notes and then took his phone out. He typed Skulduggery’s number in and then wrote him a message.

M/n: Hey, I didn’t ask if you used WhatsApp or something to write with, so I am doing it with SMS and waste my precious money. I found something weird, maybe you know what it is. I took some notes on it. I will send it to you in a second. By the way, it is the Coroner from the Testament of Gordon’s.

Then M/n sent it. After a little bit it was shown that he saw it and wrote back.

Skulduggery: Ok.

M/n then reread his notes and made sure everything was readable. He took a picture and sent it to Skulduggery. Then he added another text.

M/n: This is clearly some kind of poison, but I’ve never seen, nor heard, of something like this. It seems out of this...world ? I am pretty confused and unsure what to think. This is the third client I have, that has unknown substances on them. Substances that I can’t place. You have any idea what this is ?

He put his phone away, but left the vibration on, in case. Then he took a closer look at the substance again and he got just more confused. Then his phone vibrated and M/n picked it up.

Skulduggery: Where did you find this substance at, from the victim ?

M/n: In the lungs and stomach. It was reaching for the brain and heart too as it seemed. It seemed to be a climbing substance. I just have no idea what the hell it is.

Skulduggery: I know that kind of poison. It is very rare and very dangerous. Can you give me the file reports about the victim and a sample of the substance until tomorrow ?

M/n: Is that a ‘special’ case ?

Skulduggery: It is. And it is very urgent that I take it into my hands.

M/n: Alright. I will sneak it out today and I will be at Gordon’s until tomorrow. I have vacation time for two weeks after today. I have been working for too long and they force me to take a break, so today is my only chance.

Skulduggery: Okay. Thank you. You have a good eye. Others wouldn’t have thought anything of it. It looks like normal slime people have.

M/n: I know. I always check everything though, just to make sure, to find stuff like this. Thank you.

Skulduggery: I will get Telegram installed, so we can communicate.

M/n: Okay. I will install it too.

Skulduggery: I will give you my tag after, so you can find me.

M/n: Okay.

With that M/n put his phone back into his pocket and then he left his place, to get the file report of the victim. He opened one of his drawers and then took it out and stuffed it into his backpack. He also took the substance’s file report and stuffed it into his backpack.

Then he returned and sealed the sample off nicely, then put it into his backpack too and he remade the files. Even lied about the slimy substance, he found, to be nothing. With that his job was done for the day and he clocked out.

It was already 14:00 o’clock. He was supposed to leave 30 minutes ago, so he better leaves now, before his Boss yells at him again for working overtime. Usually he had work until 17:00 to 18:00 o’clock, but because he overworked a lot, he was forced home very early that day and then into two weeks of vacation, for his own health.

He had to call a cab, because his own car was right now in the garage and getting a check up, that everything was still fine. They had to fix something near its engine and he was only able to pick his car up by tomorrow.

As he arrived at Grimwood, he was surprised by the visit he had. Stephanie and Melissa were inside the house and sat on the couch. They smiled as they saw him.

“Hello Brother !”, Stephanie greeted.

M/n smiled.

“Hello, Steph, Mom.”

“Hello, Son. We cleaned up a bit for you. We waited for you to come back and now we would drive back. It is already a bit late.”, Melissa said.

“Okay. Be careful on the way home, yes ?”

“We will be, Son. Be careful, okay ?”

“Always, Mom.”

Then they left, only to come back inside after 10 minutes. It was raining and M/n looked at them concerned.

“What is it, Mom ?”, he asked.

“The car won’t turn on. I need to call someone to pick it up.”, she answered.

“Oh dear. I’m sorry, but I have no idea how to fix it...”, M/n muttered.

That was a plain lie, but he couldn’t let his Mother know that he had done a lot of things, besides start a job as a Coroner. Gordon paid for THREE different schoolings. One of them was Mechanic, the other was Autopsy and the last one was Robotics. Gordon arranged everything in a timed schedule for M/n too.

First he went to Mechanic for a few hours, then to Robotics and then he went to Autopsy until the evening. LATE evening. M/n was very busy and under a lot of pressure, but he pulled through. He wanted this and he will be forever grateful to his Uncle, that he helped him so much.

When he had to study or learn, Gordon helped him, by taking M/n’s notes and asking him questions, which he had to answer correctly to and then he went to sleep at Midnight or late after it, and on weekends he took proper rest and studied even harder.

“No problem, honey. I will just call someone. Can we stay until then ?”, Melissa asked.

“Of course you can stay, Mom. I won’t leave you standing in the rain.”, M/n said.

“Thank you, Hun.”

“No problem.”, he replied with a smile.

Then Melissa got out her phone and she called some people to collect her car and give them a ride to the garage. They were on their way.

“I will be on my way to my study. I need to put away a few things and make my bed and I have to fill out some papers.”, M/n excused himself.

“Yeah, sure. We will tell you when we leave.”

“Okay, Mom.”

With that M/n left and entered his study. He gave a huff of distress.

“Out of all days...it had to be today where they are stuck...”, M/n muttered under his breath.

He whipped out his phone.

M/n: I am home, but Mom and my Sister are here too. Their car broke down, I’ll let you know when they are gone.

Skulduggery: Do you have the files and the sample ?

M/n: Sure do. In my Backpack.

Skulduggery: Okay, I am close by, because of the rain. I will wait until they are away.

M/n: Splendid. I will instantly tell you when I can. I hope you won’t get wet... this was a very unexpected visit from them.

Skulduggery: I am very dry in my own car, thank you for asking.

M/n: Okay. Let us hope they will leave soon. I don’t hate them, but out of all days, today this had to happen...

Skulduggery: I understand what you mean. Don’t worry.

“M/n ?”, Melissa called.

M/n: Have to go, Brb.

M/n put his phone away and opened the door.

“Yes Mom ?”, he called.

“They will be here in 45 minutes.”

“Okay. Do you want me to cook you something to eat ?”, M/n asked.

“No, no, Dear. Do your paperwork. We will eat when we left.”

“Are you sure, Mom ?”

“Yes, Honey.”

“Okay.”

M/n closed his door again and huffed annoyed. He pulled out his phone.

M/n: I hope you have a very loose time schedule...We have to wait for 45 minutes.

Skulduggery: I have a lot of time right now.

M/n: Good. Text me, if you need something. I need to do paperwork.

Skulduggery: What kind of paperwork ?

M/n: Autopsy. I did another body and made messy notes, now I need to transfer it all onto a proper sheet of organized paper. Until I am done, the 45 minutes will be over.

Skulduggery: Alright then.

With that M/n left the SMS App and entered YouTube, listening to music, while he filled out his papers.

-45 minutes later-

Melissa knocked on M/n’s door and he quickly put away his Autopsy report papers. Then he opened the door.

“Yes ?”, he asked.

“They are here, but we have another problem...”, Melissa said softly.

“What is it, Mom ?”

“Only one of us can go with them. They don’t have more space. Steph asked to stay. She would only stay for an hour.”

M/n could hear glass, in his mind, shatter.

‘Oh you gotta be KIDDING me ! Out of ALL days !’

“Sure she can.”

“She won’t be a burden ?”

“Mom, this is Steph we talk about. She is never a burden. Don’t worry, I can watch her for a night.”

“Are you sure ?”

“I am Mom.”

“Okay, Hun. Thank you. I’ll take my leave then and call later when I am back. I will pick her up as soon as I can.”

“Okay, Mom.”

With that she left and M/n whipped up his phone.

M/n: We need another plan. Steph is staying over and I don’t know for how long tonight. It was said only an hour, but it is uncertain.

Skulduggery: Well, this day isn’t going like we wanted it to...

M/n: No kidding...

Skulduggery: I will collect the things when she is asleep or gone then. Don’t worry.

M/n: Okay.

Then M/n left the App and downloaded Telegram. After he did that he went back to SMS and asked.

M/n: Do you have Telegram already ? I made an account just now.

Skulduggery: I did. Here, I will send you my account name.

M/n: Thanks.

Then he sent his account name and he searched it up on Telegram. He found him quickly and sent a friend request.

M/n: I named myself “Corrupted”. No one needs to know who I actually am.

Skulduggery: Smart move on your part.

M/n: I know. *Smirks*

Skulduggery: Writing facial expressions now ?

M/n: I can, when I feel very nice, yes.

Skulduggery: Very nice of you, yes.

M/n: I better check on my Sister. She is very responsible and all, yes, but she is still four years younger than me and I don’t want her to do something stupid. She has her moments.

Skulduggery: Alright. Tell me when she is asleep or gone.

M/n: I will.

M/n put the phone away and left his study. He went down the corridor, spotted his Uncle’s study’s door wide open and entered the it, he spotted Stephanie on the chair, reading the manuscript, Gordon wrote, before he died. He smiled and just left her alone. He entered the kitchen and ate a small snack, then he picked up his book about Robotics again, continuing to read where he left off last.

-Two hours later-

The phone rang and M/n jumped in fright. He got up and answered.

“Hello ?”, he asked.

“Hello, Son.”, Melissa’s voice appeared.

“Hi Mom. You okay ?”

“Yes, yes I am. You and Steph ?”, she asked.

“We are just fine.”

Stephanie appeared downstairs and looked at M/n. He worded silently the word MOM and then he continued to listen to her.

“What have you two been up to ?”

“I read a book.”

“One of Gordon’s ?”, Melissa asked with a warning in her tone.

“What ? No ! I read a book about my job. To get better in marketing. Mom, seriously !”, M/n scolded offended.

“Oh, alright then. And Steph ?”

“She has been reading with me in my book, Mom. No worries.”

“Oh, okay.”

“So, is the car done ?”

“That is why I called, Son... They can’t fix it and the road to you is flooded. I will get a cab and try to get to you as quick as I can. But it will take another two hours.”

M/n was worried for his Mother.

“Mum...just go home.”

“Absolutely not ! I can’t leave you two alone in a strangers house !”, she protested.

“Mom, I live here. This was Uncle Gordon’s house and Stephanie is safe with me. You just said that the road is flooded, why would you try something as dangerous as to cross a FLOODED road ? In the worst case scenario, you will die trying. There could be a counter current and it could tear you off of the street and you could drown.”

“It won’t take long ! I will be fine !”

“Mom...where is the road flooded ?”

A short silence.

“At the bridge.”, she answered.

M/n scoffed.

“Mom ! You will take ages and it is way too dangerous to cross a flooded bridge ! The water will not just flood it, but also try to escape, which will cause strong counter currents ! They will pull you down into death ! No ! You go home and I will watch over Stephanie tonight ! You can come collect her tomorrow, okay ?”

“But...”

“Mom, think very clearly. This is too dangerous. DON’T do it. Go home and try tomorrow. I don’t want you to risk your life for something as silly as this. Steph has me and I can protect her if something happens. PLEASE don’t make me call police and Dad just to get you home.”

Melissa was silent and then sighed.

“Are you sure you can deal with this ?”, she asked in defeat.

“I am to a hundred percent, Mom. Don’t worry. Steph and me will be just fine.”, M/n said with a relieved smile.

“Okay, fine. Give me Steph, so I can tell her good night, okay ?”

“Okay. Night Mom and sleep well. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Sleep well, Son.”

M/n turned to Stephanie.

“Steph, Mom wants to say Good Night to you.”

“She isn’t coming ?”, she asked her Brother.

“No. The bridge to us is flooded and the car isn’t fixed either. She will pick you up tomorrow.”, M/n explained.

“Oh, okay.”, she said with a beaming smile.

He handed her the phone and she and her Mom said Good night and Steph assured her that she was alright with all of this. After she hung up, she beamed.

“My first time all alone in  here with you, Brother !”, she cheered.

He chuckled.

“Indeed. What do you want to eat ?”

“Humm... What do we have ?”

“A lot of food. What do would you like, I will serve.”, M/n said.

“Hmm...Oh ! Your tomato salad and...maybe some ramen noodles ?”, she asked.

M/n smiled.

“Comin’ right up, Mrs.”

She cheered and M/n made the food. After a while they ate and M/n told her to behave. He had to do something in his room and she nodded. He entered his study and sighed in frustration. He took his phone and wrote Skulduggery in Telegram.

Corrupted: Well, we have a problem. The bridge is flooded, Mom can’t pick up Steph and Steph is a hyper active twelve year old. So...any ideas ?”

Skulduggery: I will wait until she is asleep. Otherwise you will have to sneak out and give me the papers.

Corrupted: Why me ?!

Skulduggery: Because you can quickly dry off and I can’t.

Corrupted: Oh...right...Fine.

Skulduggery: Good.

With that M/n stuffed his phone back into his pocket and then left his study. He caught Stephanie again in Gordon’s study and she continued to read the script. He smiled and left her alone.

He entered the living room and turned on the TV, watching “How to train your Dragon” one.

-Time skip-

He must have nodded off, because he woke up and saw that another Movie was running. On the clock stood, that it is Midnight. The rain seemed to have stopped too. He sighed, got up, stretched, groaned as his body cracked here and there and then he went to the study only to see Stephanie leaving it.

“I just wanted to get ready for bed...”, she said.

“It’s okay, Steph.”, M/n calmed her down.

After a while of getting ready, the phone rang and M/n had a very bad gut feeling. He saw Stephanie approach it.

“Little Sister, don’t say your name.”, he warned.

“Why ?”, she asked.

“Bad gut feeling... be careful. And put the speaker on.”, he said.

She nodded and then picked up, turning on the speaker. M/n selected Skulduggery’s number and called him. He answered, but M/n didn’t say anything besides...

“Who is it ?”, he asked.

“No one is answering...”, she replied.

M/n hid his phone behind his back.

“Is it still ?”, she asked for his gut feeling.

“Still bad...”, he replied.

She nodded and took a deep breath.

“Hello ?”, Stephanie repeated.

“Who is there ?”, a male voice asked.

M/n felt a VERY bad feeling. She looked at M/n and he shook his head, eyes holding threat. She nodded in understanding.

“I’m sorry. Who did you want to speak with, Sir ?”, she asked.

“Who is there ?”, the voice repeated and this time it sounded dangerous.

M/n pulled his phone up to his mouth and ear.

“I think...I am asking for help right now...I feel VERY threatened...Help, Skulduggery....PLEASE....”, he whispered shakily.

He heard cursing on the other end.

“Don’t hang up !”, he yelled through the phone, urgency in his voice.

“If you wanted to speak to Gordon Edgley, then I have to sadly tell you, that-“

“I know that Edgley is dead.”, interrupted the man rudely, “Who are you ? Your name ?”

Stephanie hesitated and looked at M/n, who shook his head.

“Why do you want to know ?”, she asked.

“What are you doing in that house ? Why are you in his house ?”, he pressed.

“If you want to call tomorrow again-“

“I don’t want to ! Okay ? Listen, girl, if you ruin the plans of my Master, will he be very angry and he is no one, that you should piss off. Did you understand ? And now tell me who you are !”, he demanded angered.

M/n hid his phone on a save place so Skulduggery can listen in. He ripped the phone out of her hands in anger.

“Joe.”, he answered.

“...what ?”, the stranger asked confused.

“Her name is Joe mama. In other words, your fucking Mother. Now fuck off. I don’t care that you have a Master you kinky fucker. Let him whip you or whatever, but leave us ALONE.”, M/n growled out.

“No one talks to me like that !”

“Well no one in their right mind calls someone in the middle of the night and asks them shit, like some CREEP ! Now piss off ! I have a gun and I am NOT afraid to use it, got it Pisshead ?!”, M/n yelled back, protective mode activated.

“You don’t tell me what to do !”

“Just piss off already you disgusting creep !”, he yelled and slammed the phone down.

Stephanie stood there, frightened. As M/n turned around, he had a fire in his eyes, she never saw before.

“Steph, go to the Bedroom upstairs, with the lace hook. I will get a weapon.”, M/n said.

“B-but-!”

“I promised Mom to protect you. I will NOT fail. Now GO !”, he yelled.

Stephanie whimpered, grabbed the lace hook and ran up the stairs as the front door knocked loudly.

“Open up !”, the same man from before yelled.

M/n grabbed his phone and asked softly.

“How long until you are here ? He is at the fucking door.”

“Just a bit longer. I am almost there !”, Skulduggery replied.

M/n hid his phone again and then took deep breaths. He saw the shadow of the man at the glass of the front door.

“Open the damn door !”, the man yelled.

M/n rushed into the kitchen and got out the biggest kitchen knife he could find. Then he came back and yelled.

“FUCK OFF YOU BASTARD !”

The man slammed at the door harder and it shook.

“Leave my door alone you asshole ! I will NOT open shit for you, you CREEP ! I will call the police on your ass ! PISS OFF !”

The hammering stopped and M/n instantly knew he would try the back door. He checked it quickly and it was locked. Then the window knocked in the living room, next to him. He snapped around, murder clearly in his eyes. The man laughed.

“What are you planning with that ?”, the stranger asked.

“Stab your fucking eyes out and then cut your limbs off ! Now piss off you bastard !”, M/n snarled.

“I just want to come inside. Open the door for me, boy, and let me in.”, he said.

“Ha ! Fuck off, you piece of shit ! I am not opening a door, to strangers like you ! PISS OFF ! The police will be here any minute !”, he threatened.

“You’re lying.”

He picked up the phone that hung on the wall again, pointedly.

“Don’t do that.”

“I will call the police, if you don’t fuck off right now.”, he threatened darkly.

“The road is flooded, boy. If you call the police, I will break the door in and kill you hours before they even arrived.”

M/n scoffed, not scared. It only fuelled his urge to protect. He could care less about his life. This man was big talk and nothing else. Hot air is all.

“Why do you want to enter so badly ?”

“It has nothing to do with you. I was sent to pick something up. Let me in, I will look around, take what I was looking for, and leave again. I won’t hurt you and your friend. I PROMISE. But now open the door this instant !”

M/n’s grip tightened on the knife and he glared even harder.

“First you sound like some creep, then you threaten to kill me, now you tell me you wanna steal belongings and then you have the nerve to yell at me, like I am some dog. Piss off you piece of trash, before I will take care of you personally.”, M/n growled out darkly.

The man glared and punched in the window. His eyes sparkled and he entered the house. He didn’t care about the shattered glass. M/n went into a fighting position, ready to fight for his life.

“I told you multiple times to fuck off, you absolute piece of filth.”, M/n snarled.

The intruder attacked quickly. M/n, just as quickly, side stepped and cut the man’s cheek. The man was shocked and touched his cheek, then looked at his bloody hand. He glared at M/n, who gave him a nasty glare over his shoulder.

The intruder screamed in anger and attacked again. M/n dodged again and swung his knife, cutting the man near his eye, which he quickly close. Then he howled in pain.

“You little rat !”, the man hollered.

He attacked again and M/n dodged, then swung his legs out, making the male trip, make a roll forward and slam against the wall. He grunted, but got back up, ready to attack again.

“Just give me the damn key, you rat !”, the intruder screamed.

Then the front door flew out of its hinges and Skulduggery entered. M/n was still in murder mode, so he didn’t really care that he arrived. He was in protection mode. He will NOT let him get to Stephanie !

The man cursed and got up, trying to run for the stairs. M/n blocked the way and swiped at his face with his knife again. The man screamed as it made a deep cut on his nose.

“Piss off, you Crack head. You ain’t getting anywhere.”, M/n growled out darkly.

The man tried to punch him, but M/n dodged and stabbed his hand with the knife. The man screamed loudly and punched M/n, landing a hit. The boy grunted and slammed against the house wall. Skulduggery jumped into full action at that.

M/n still had a tight grip on the knife, luckily. As he opened his eyes again, he spotted Stephanie and she snuck up on the man, that was currently trying to beat the shit out of Skulduggery.

He scrambled to get up and stop her, but she already hit him aver the head with it and his attention went to her. The man kicked her away and she screamed in pain, which made M/n snap.

“Don’t. Touch. My. SISTER. YOU. FREAK !!!”, M/n roared and attacked again, knew fire in his eyes.

He didn’t notice, what Stephanie did. And that was that Skulduggery lost his glasses and hat. He jumped onto the man and stabbed at his clothes in a fury. The man hollered and threw M/n off, who got up instantly again and went again for an attack. He lost his knife, which Stephanie had now, but he didn’t need it. He set for a mighty punch. It made the intruder shout in pain as he got it into his chin. Then M/n punched him harshly into the stomach and the male lost his breath.

He kicked M/n away and he was ready to go again, but Stephanie held him back.

“LET ME AT HIM !!! NO ONE HURTS MY SISTER AND STAYS ALIVE !”, he roared.

M/n struggled against her, but she hugged him tightly.

“BUBBA !”, she yelled.

M/n froze and looked at her, over his shoulder. She seemed frightened. He forced himself to calm down. His Sister was more important than killing some scumbag. Suddenly there was shuffling and both Skulduggery and Stephanie shouted.

“WATCH OUT !”

M/n snapped his head back and saw the man aim a powerful punch for his head. M/n quickly pulled his arms up and he punched them instead. M/n and Stephanie flew backwards and he turned around, held his sister tightly to his chest, turned them and protected her with his back, as they slammed against the wall. M/n grunted in pain and then loosened his grip on his Sister.

He was weakened and he couldn’t move. His body was processing everything that just happened in a few seconds. Then his body shut down on him.

“G-go...can’t...move...”, M/n got out weakly.

Stephanie looked at him in a panic, while Skulduggery and the intruder wrestled around.

“I am NOT leaving you !”, she protested.

Then the stranger screamed. And M/n got feeling back into his body. Nothing was broken as it felt, but he was in pain.

“You don’t seriously think, that you can stop me !”, as he tried to get up.

He wasn’t very stable on his legs anymore as it seemed.

“Do you even know who I am ?!”, he screamed.

“No clue.”, Pleasant replied.

The man spat out blood and grinned. M/n got up on shaky legs, grabbed the knife, Stephanie dropped next to him and carefully approached him, from behind.

“But I know you. My Master told me everything about you, Detective, and if you want to stop me, you have to come up with something better.”

Skulduggery looked at the two siblings, shrugged his shoulders and let a fireball appear in his hand. The siblings were in amazement. Then he threw it at the man, but instead of screaming in pain, he laughed.

“More ! Give me more !”, he laughed out.

M/n was disturbed by that man, but also in shock that it didn’t kill him. Skulduggery shrugged again with his shoulders.

“If you really want that...”

With that he pulled out an old revolver and pulled the trigger. The recoil pushed his hand up. The bullet hit the man in the shoulder and he screamed. He turned around, ran for the door, stumbled, ducked and ran in slalom, to not be hit again. Because of the flames he couldn’t see clearly and he ran against the wall in the hallway.

Then he was gone.

Stephanie stared at the door, trying to understand what just happened, while M/n was in amazement and utter pain. Just then he also saw Pleasant and it was a skull. The hair and everything fell off in the fight and he saw the skull as clear as day.

‘So Uncle wasn’t lying...Magic exists...Explains so much too...’, M/n thought in wonder and pain.

Masterlist HERE !

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #Stephanie Edgley #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #Part 2 - Danger

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe MASTERLIST !!

Summary: Gordon Edgley is dead. M/n is Stephanie's older, adopted, Brother and he has real anger issues when it comes to his Family, which are only, Stephanie, Melissa, Desmond and Gordon. Thanks to some stupid psychos, M/n and Stephanie got introduced to a world of Magic. How will M/n react to it ? Will he like it ? Will his Family grow or will it become lesser ? Read here to find out !

CHAPTERS!:

Part 1 - Gordon’s Testament

Part 2 - Danger

Part 3 – Take us with you

Part 4 – China Sorrows

Part 5 – Tailor Bespoke

Part 6 – Convincing Ghastly

Part 7 – The Elders

Part 8 – The Coroner is ticked off

Part 9 – The Vault

Part 10 – M/n’s Workplace

Part 11 - Inspections

#skulduggery pleasant #derek landy #male!reader #not the canon au #read warnings above #my au #skulduggery pleasant x reader universe #ghastly bespoke #anton shudder #valkyrie cain #erskine ravel #Saracen Rue #Dexter Vex #Corrival Deuce #nefarian serpine #Stephanie Edgley #Gordon Edgley #Family Edgley #Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe #MASTERLIST

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

MASTERLIST

Skulduggery Pleasant

READ THIS PLEASE ! THANK YOU ! If you don't know the characters' looks then look at THIS ! I doubt I have to mention it, it should be obvious, but... BOOK SPOILERS !!! INCLUDES ALL THE BOOKS DEREK LANDY HAS WRITTEN SO FAR ! I have permission from Derek Landy himself that I CAN write fanfics of his work (Yes I asked in case, before I get in trouble). So no one can complain !

I DO NOT SUPPORT: rape, abuse and other bad behavior ! This is pure fanfiction and fantasy ONLY ! People who can get easily triggered by it, DON'T FUCKING READ IT ! Warnings are at the very top of the beginning, so READ THEM BEFORE you read the fic ! (I doubt it will appear, but I better add it in case) RULES !

Skulduggery Pleasant Universe x Male!Reader

Book 1 :

WIP (Work in progress)

Book 2:

WIP

Book 3:

WIP

Book 4:

WIP

Book 5:

WIP

Book 6:

Part 1 - The Death Bringer is...

Part 2 –  How Lord Vile came to be

Part 3 – Anger and a plan

Part 4 – The fight and operation

Part 5 – A bit of Background to Erskin

Part 6 – China’s secret

Part 7 – A small visit

Part 8 – Meet Damion

Part 9 – Not your fault

Book 7:

WIP

______________________________

Oneshot Masterlist HERE !

______________________________

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

______________________________

For any informations go to

update-blog-bp9

Main blog

@blackypanther9

#Skulduggery Pleasant #Derek Landy #Valkyrie Cain #Male!Reader #Skulduggery Pleasant x Reader #Ghastly Bespoke #The Dead Men #Erskine Ravel #Reader can have different names read update to understand why #Saracen Rue #Kenspeckle Grouse #Tanith Low #Dexter Vex #Anton Shudder #Larrikin #Hopeless #Corrival Deuce