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batmansymbol · 4 years

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spoilery thoughts on the marvelous mrs. maisel season 3

oh. oh. my Fictionalized!Lenny-obsessed heart. his jokes are so good. his physicality is so endearing. i am crushing so hard. i am going to reblog gifs of every scene in episode five.

i REALLY wish they had just made him a fictional famous comedian instead of, you know, Lenny Bruce, because i think the writers are slowly realizing midge has way more chemistry with him than anyone else, but they can’t wind up together because he was a real person.

the writers did it! they made me like joel again!! i was so annoyed with him during season 2, but we’re back!!! crazy what can happen when a character has an objective and exhibits appealing personality traits

but why, why, is the show still determined to give abe and rose long, protracted, uninteresting subplots?! midge’s parents are ONLY interesting when they’re onscreen with midge. no exceptions.

seriously, what the hell was with the rose’s trust fund subplot??? “abe lost his job, so we’re broke!” “just kidding, we’re not broke; there’s a trust fund we’ve been pulling from!” “but now i have pulled out of the trust fund because of Pride and Feminism, so we’re broke again!” y’all could have just left them broke in the beginning, cut out the middleman, and subsequently, this totally inert subplot.

and the activist newspaper?! fuming. not even gonna get started on that nonsense.

i loved the trajectory of Sophie’s show. actually, i loved everything involving Susie this season. Alex Borstein is a GIFT from GOD and we do NOT deserve her.

can we please at some point acknowledge that she’s not straight tho?? please???? ever?????

speaking of queer things

what happened to Shy in the last episode made me so sad. on one hand, it’s written well as a genuine misunderstanding. and it’s written well overall: as midge did that final set, i felt myself moving slowly outside her perspective. i heard the set from Shy’s point of view and it gutted me!! can you imagine one of the only people you trusted, maybe the person you’ve trusted most ever (given that Shy told Midge his real name, which he hasn’t even told Reggie), basically outing you onstage in front of thousands of people? making jokes about effeminate gayness when he isn’t even an effeminate man? obviously midge is supposed to be clueless sometimes (eg when she says in horror, ”he called me a ‘white girl’!”), but watching that set felt like one of those terrible epiphanies where you realize what someone’s thought of you all along. as if the second she found out the truth, the only thing she could think to joke about when it came to him was his sexuality, and not little foibles like she lampoons in everyone else.

overall, i’m torn. part of me wishes it hadn’t happened because it just... felt bad to see. at the same time, i’m intrigued that they’d show midge’s cluelessness actually doing damage. in reality, so often, people don’t get permanently hurt out of malice, just obliviousness or miscommunication, and that doesn’t show up onscreen nearly as often.

in fact, the whole last episode seemed to show midge’s flaws in a way we’ve never really dealt with: the revelation of how much she hurt benjamin, and then possibly ruining the life and reputation of a real friend. it’s highly unusual for this show. i'd love to see the writers engage with this further and show her, idk, growing and changing from these experiences, but i honestly don’t know if they will?

which is a bit frustrating to watch! that whole tirade of susie’s about how sophie isn’t brave but midge is, because midge refused to do that live radio commercial for, basically, an alt-right politician? i feel like the idea of her bravery or principles actually could have been driven home, if at the end of that last episode, midge had voluntarily given the rest of her tour openings to moms mabley because she realized she’d gotten preferential treatment, or something. that would have demonstrated real character in the way susie was talking about, and no outing scene necessary.

anyway. shy deserved better. i don’t really want to watch the show without him. and here i was all hopeful for a happy ending where reggie realized he was in love with shy or something. :(

still, i really loved Reggie in that final scene. obviously i’m not going to prescribe what story they ‘should’ have told, and given what they chose to do, it all felt realistic, Reggie insulating Shy from Midge after she hurt him. but i wonder if them flying off into the night will be the show’s pretext for writing Shy off and letting Midge go unchanged.

i don’t think the show is trying to go too deeply into this, but there’s something interesting to me in the idea of comedy as something that strips away your desire to grow as a person. rose brushes against that concept in her final confrontation, saying she doesn’t want to laugh at people’s flaws and misfortunes. if midge keeps fucking up and fucking up and never grows, only jokes about her defects (or displays her defects through jokes), that suggests her persona is closing around her, locking her into those flaws; it suggests you can’t actually exorcise your demons onstage, only define them more and more clearly. what does it do to a person when they splay open their worst feelings and are rewarded by the crowd for it every night. what a disincentive to get better and to be better.

to conclude: fictional lenny bruce is hot in a suit. time to queue up gifs.

#personal #essay #tmmm #the marvelous mrs. maisel #long post #highly important text posts #tmmm spoilers

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nitrateglow · 5 years

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For the ranking ask: Alan Arkin, Gene Kelly, Claude Rains, Katharine Hepburn

ALAN ARKIN

5. Deadhead Miles - There are so many subtle details and touches in Arkin’s characterization that elevate what looks like a drugged up manchild into a rather lonely, sad figure. You get the sense he’s lost anything that anchors him (a family, religion, etc.) and he’s just coasting through life, conning people for kicks more than anything, though he still has a soul and can feel badly for people worse off than himself.

4. The Heart is a Lonely Hunter - Totally heartbreaking performance, yet without an iota of self-pity or bathos. Also, his use of ASL looks very convincing. It makes me sad Arkin didn’t really do more dramatic work of this caliber in the 70s and 80s.

3. The In-Laws - In terms of his pure comedies, this is Arkin’s best that I’ve seen. He plays a straight-laced guy thrown into chaos and his reactions are not mugging, but sheer, void-staring horror and that is hilarious.

2. Catch-22 - Probably Arkin’s technical “best” role or the one that seems most representative of his penchant for the strange, dark comedies where he seems to be most at home. Having read the book first and pictured Yossarian differently, I wondered if he would fit the part. Ultimately, he was perfect at capturing the essence of this classic character.

1. Wait Until Dark - I mean, was there ever any doubt this is my favorite? I can’t resist a bad guy and Roat is one of the best “for the evulz” bad guys ever.

Arkin could have easily just played this character as a boilerplate psycho, but he instead emphasizes the “actor” element of the character, not just in how seriously he takes the roleplaying in the con, but even when he’s being “himself.” He feels like a demon masquerading at being human and the effect is uncanny.

As much as I enjoyed Stacey Keach’s cocaine-fueled scenery-chewing in the 1982 TV adaptation of Wait, it made me appreciate Arkin’s chilling, low-key menace all the more. Like, I love how he never shouts at Susy when trying to intimidate her: he speaks softly, even amiably, which is a sign of his complete confidence-- much more terrifying than a screaming nut TRYING to scare you. In fact, he only shouts when he’s scared, which is just a brilliant choice.

Also, he manages to be quite hot despite having a terrible haircut. A++

GENE KELLY

5. Brigadoon - So, I’m putting this one here mainly because I don’t remember a lot of it, but I saw this movie at an impressionable age (probably eight or nine) and recall being spellbound by it. Kelly plays a man torn between two worlds-- pretty much literally-- and I recalled being very moved by his romance with Bonnie Jean.

4. The Pirate - So, I’m not crazy about this movie, but Kelly is fun in it from what i recall. Also, he wears tons of ass-hugging, form-fitting 19th-century clothes that make the movie worth every minute.

3. Inherit the Wind - A pure dramatic role where Kelly plays a snarky journalist covering a thinly veiled version of the Monkey Scopes trial in the 1920s. While more of a supporting role, he makes a big impression and I love the way he calls the chimp “GRANDPA!”

2. The Three Musketeers - If Doug Fairbanks never made his version of The Three Musketeers, Kelly would be my favorite D’Artagnan. As it is, he’s second and just as perfect for the role as you would imagine.

1. Singin in the Rain - He’s most remembered for this movie for a reason. He got to be funny, glamorous, and romantic all in one. The “Singin’ in the Rain” number is now so iconic that I think Kelly’s acting gets overlooked a bit in it. He’s just so giddy there-- it’s so sweet and endearing that I can get why A Clockwork Orange recontextualizing that song upsets people lmao.

CLAUDE RAINS

5. The Adventures of Robin Hood - Basil Rathbone is more of the main bad guy in this movie, I guess, but Rains was my favorite of the villains. He’s so fey and deliciously wicked. And Rains really rocks that wig and tunic.

4. The Invisible Man - Only a voice for 99% of the runtime, but damn, he makes an impression.

3. Notorious - A sign of a great actor-- Rains made even a gross ass Nazi likable-- at least at first!

2. The Phantom of the Opera - Rains really made just a great Phantom. He’s not the most lethal or openly menacing, but he is just so tragic and passionate. When he starts reacting very emotionally when he learns his music has been stolen-- oh man. I have not seen the movie in years but that scene plays in my mind with such vividness, especially Rains’ impassioned, enraged line reading.

Rains also benefits from a really nasty-looking makeup. My own skin tingles seeing it. (Take note, Gerard Butler and Julian Sands!)

1. Casablanca - A typical choice? Okay yes. But I just love Captain Renault so much! His witticisms help make Casablanca the classic it is and I love his banter with Rick throughout the movie.

KATHARINE HEPBURN (I am shocked by realizing how little of her bonafide classics I have seen... and with the exception of The Philadelphia Story, I’ve actually only seen these others once and a while ago, so forgive the brevity)

5. Christopher Strong - I don’t really like this movie very much, but Hepburn is fabulous. She makes her strong-willed character so likable that when the “respectable” characters get their happy ending and she doesn’t, you’re just so angry.

4. The African Queen - I recall liking her performance when I saw the film years ago, but aside from her chemistry with Bogie, I can’t go into detail. Sorry.

3. The Lion in the Winter - Her sparring with O’Toole is so entertaining.

2. Suddenly, Last Summer - Among the Tennessee Williams adaptations, this one does not get much press and that’s a shame because Hepburn’s villainous southern aristocrat is chilling to the bone. You just absolutely hate her with relish.

1. The Philadelphia Story - Tracy Lord as a character-- abrasive, arrogant, sneering-- should annoy me. But she’s just so damned likable. Hepburn’s blend of fire and hidden vulnerability make this screwball heroine (or “goddess” if you will) so very appealing. The studio apparently wanted Norma Shearer in the role, but as much as I love her, I think Hepburn was the best choice and she gave a classic performance.

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scuba-claire · 5 years

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Cursed Child Year Four Part 1 Recap

I thought I’d do a mini recap of year fours first part 1. Disclaimer, this is just my opinion, my interpretations could be wrong, these notes are just what I thought when watching it. I know I missed things, as it’s hard to pick up on everything watching them for the first time. I also don’t think you can get a real feel for how things are going to be for the entire year based on their first show.

With that in mind I really enjoyed the show. Cast change can make the show feel fresh and new again, although this wasn’t quite as obvious this year as it was last year, as only a few of the main actors have changed this year.

I only really made notes about any changes I spotted, or my thoughts on the new actors. Although I noticed the existing cast did change things up slightly in some scenes, it wasn’t my main focus, and I didn’t make any notes for them. I’ll probably notice those things more once I’m no longer looking out for the changes generally.

Act 1

There are changes right from the opening scene. Mark stays on stage after putting on the sorting hat and directs the rest of the ensemble as they move the cases. I’d need to watch it a few more times to get the choreography, but it’s more magical, with people moving in slow motion etc as the hat directs them. It’s also a longer scene now, I think.

I liked this, although a friend of mine pointed out that the old version made it feel like muggle Kings Cross, until they go through the barrier, whereas this version has magic happening in the station instantly. I get that, although I like that there’s magic on stage now right from the first scene.

Dominic as Albus in the first scene is like a jittery, excited child, who’s in awe of everything around him. Rayxia as Rose is great. I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed watching her Rose. Michelle has a nice chemistry with Ron and Rayxia, her Hermione is really relaxed when she’s with her family and friends.

Lily’s line is different here. She mentions them always being late. Also Tom now reacts like Paul did on Broadway, when Harry says Snape was one of the bravest men he ever knew.

Albus meeting Scorpius was cute, they don’t have Sam and Theo levels of instant chemistry, but I like them together. Dominic singing the sweets line back to him was adorably awkward.

Dominic changes through the montage scenes, slowly getting beaten down by the bullying and how he blames everything that’s gone wrong in his life on Harry. Dominic smiles a lot, except when he’s with Harry. Like he genuinely thinks Harry is the reason he doesn’t fit in and is being bullied. But even then, the excited kid from the first scene still comes through in the odd moment, he’s genuinely happy he manages to cast incendio.

The Karl track is the track from Broadway, so Karl gets his chest signed by Harry, and the Karl actor is the carer in St Oswald’s. Craig as Karl was so star struck getting Harry’s signature on his stomach that he looked like he was going to faint, it was amazing.

The rose from Broadway is here, and it’s as awkward as I thought it would be.

Emma as Polly looks stunning in that wig, her Polly is gorgeous, and she knows it. She’s the pretty popular girl who will obviously pick on the geeky Albus and Scorpius. Luke as Yann gives me rich, pure blood, posh boy vibes, and I’m here for it. I missed watching Craig as I was watching these two, I need to get a feel for him in Part 2. The problem with a first show, when I’m trying to focus on so many new things and new characters, is that I know I missed loads.

I actually really like the new wand dance. I don’t know why people don’t like it. It’s not actually that different, some different choreography, they all gather around him when Albus gets his wand stuck in the floor, (no more Ravenclaw baby, weird the things you miss) and they line up at the front of the stage at the end like they’re all demonstrating the spell at the front of the class. It works as they all manage to do it expect Albus. New line, even his wand wants to be in Gryffindor.

Madeleine as Delphi. I don’t know what to say other than she’s perfect. She has really got the feel for imitating someone Albus would want to be friends with in their first meeting. She’s not super confident, and gives Albus the impression that she is just like him. You can see why Albus would want to help her.

She got her wand out as she said I’m a thief, it’s a clear attempt at a joke, and it worked with her manipulative Delphi convincing Albus she’s like him. She also didn’t do anything when Amos kept calling her, like the other Delphi’s have. It was more like she was showing Albus she also had a relative who didn’t understand her and she was resigned to it. I basically loved every moment she was on stage and am excited/nervous for Act 3 today.

I really enjoyed the blanket scene. I’ve seen Albus actors do the start of this scene in two ways. Albus is either shut off from his entire family, or just has a problem with his dad. Dominic does it the second way, he interacts with his mum, James and Lily in a positive way and doesn’t seem to have major issues with any of them. His Albus issues are all with Harry.

Dominic really doesn’t want the blanket, he doesn’t understand why his dad has given him this gift he can do nothing with and just wants his dad to leave him alone. His body language at the start is really showing how he just wants his dad to go away. When he does take the blanket, he holds it and delivers his lines like he thinks if he can just get through the conversation his dad will go away.

They both get really angry, a lot angrier than Jamie and Joe in this scene. It felt like Albus letting out his frustrations at how Harry is to blame for his life being terrible. He’s goof at trying the get a reaction from Harry. After Harry says he wishes Albus wasn’t his son, Dominic sort of looked like, of course you think that, obviously his dad was just confirming to him what he already knew.

Side thought, Dominic as Albus and Ryan as James. I got the impression from this first show that James isn’t very nice to Albus, but that Albus still looks up to him and wants his approval. Like there’s a rivalry there, but in a different way to how Dylan’s James was such a dick older brother, it’s less intense.

On the train, I liked how it looked like Albus really did just consider his plan in that moment when talking to Rose. I also don’t know if I imagined this, but when Scorpius said Rose smelled like bread on the train, it looked like Dominic sniffed the air and gave Scorpius a look like, wtf are you talking about. I hope I didn’t imagine this.

Dominic didn’t sit down while Scorpius was talking on the train. He stayed standing and looked like he was just waiting for Scorpius to shut up so he could hug him. I’ve always seen that hug as spontaneous, but this was cute. Also, when the train went to move, and they lean over, Jon basically ended up on top of Dominic, I’m always here for these random Scorbus moments.

I need time to learn all the new characters in the EGM, but I could see some anti Draco stuff going on.

So, St Oswald’s. Weirdly, I didn’t hate it. I mean I didn’t like it either, but I was expecting to hate it as much as I did when I saw this version on Broadway. I didn’t, so that’s a bonus. There’s a lot going on now though, looking at one trick means I missed another one. I would need to see it again to get a full picture. Maybe when I’ve seen it a few times I’ll get used to it, or maybe I’ll hate it again.

This is nothing to do with the actors or the tricks btw. It’s the change from the stressed out carer trying to keep order while being harassed by the residents, to this arsehole carer using magic on the residents. I know they get revenge, but still, I don’t like it.

Michelle and Susie giving each other knowing looks during the dinner scene whenever Tom was speaking is something I didn’t know I wanted until now. When Tom was saying he makes an ooof noise, Michelle nodded at Susie, and when he was talking about his Skiving Snackboxes, she reacted. It really made it feel like old friends chatting and it was great.

Polyjuice scene, Madeleine is very good, this is a theme. She’s surprisingly calm at first, until the pain hits. Michelle struggled to get into the cloak, Jon helped. They’ll get it with practice.

Act 2

There are three Voldemort arms at once in the opening scene now for some reason. Kathryn’s Petunia is great, I knew that from Broadway. They’ve given little Harry new trousers that show he’s wet himself and I don’t know how I feel about that.

Madeleine, again I love how she matches Dominic’s awkwardness, but still being more confident and someone he would look up to. She didn’t even look at Scorpius as she threw the robe at him. Although she’s not playing them off against each other as much as I’ve seen with other Delphi’s. Her kiss with Albus really fit with her Delphi, Dominic smiling loads. She then she did air kisses at Scorpius as she left. I never would have thought that would work, but it did and it was brilliant.

The Hogwarts scene, Albus really resents his dad, the moment Scorpius mentioned Harry, his body language changed. Although he liked Scorpius saying he was better than his dad. He also doesn’t agree with Scorpius when he said he still gets a tingle, Dominic’s Albus gets no joy from Hogwarts and it’s sad, this boy hates his life.

It’s weird watching the first task without James, Josh or Rosemary etc, but I can see the new cast already having fun with it. The faint is still there, but it’s now Ravenclaw girl.

Dominic ate the chocolate in the hospital scene. Dominic and Jamie work well together, Albus seems convinced he can refuse his dad at first. Genuine confusion in the scene with Ron

Dominic did something I loved in this scene on the stairs when Scorpius turned up. He kept looking down at Harry during the conversation with Scorpius, like he was waiting for Harry to change his mind or checking he was saying what Harry wanted him to.

Michelle in the DADA scene, I like her stern Hermione in the AU. I haven’t got a complete feel for her Hermione in Act 1 yet, I probably need to see it again, but I enjoyed watching her here.

Longing looks in the staircase ballet.

Delphi and Scorpius, oh Madeleine is so good. Again she really finds that way of connecting to Scorpius, of being the type of person he would obviously open up to. She hadn’t really done as much to antagonise him before this, so it makes sense she’d be able to connect with Scorpius here.

With Eve, when she said she hadn’t been to Hogwarts, it came across that saying this was a slip up on her part, which she then had to cover for. But with Madeleine, Delphi saying that might have still been a mistake, but it came across more like she knew it would get Scorpius’s sympathy and make him trust her. Also, that little look she gave as she was being wheeled off stage, like thank god that worked, this is really frustrating. Not obvious enough to give anything away, but a nice touch for her actual motivations.

A general observation, I really get the Scorpius always following Albus and doing whatever he suggests from these two, more than any other Scorbus pairing. Of course Jon’s Scorpius is jumping off the train after Albus, and breaking into the ministry to get a time turner.

Dominic’s Albus is kind of bossy with Jon’s Scorpius and its clear Scorpius just accepts that. I saw this in a few moments, like when they’re talking to Amos and Jon says “do we?” Dominic was just like, sssh Scorpius, and Scorpius just shuts up. Scorpius is used to following his friend around and doing what he suggests, even if he knows it’s a bad idea.

This makes the library scene argument really work with these two. Dominic’s reactions were great, this is clearly the first time Scorpius has ever shouted at him, or called him out for his BS, and he doesn’t know what to do with that. It’s genuinely like it’s the first time he’s thought about any of it, and it makes him realise he’s been an awful friend.

Dominic’s Albus really gets across that he’s only doing any of this because of Harry, he’s panicked that McGonagall will catch them and his dad really will force Scorpius away from him forever, there’s real desperation in the way he’s trying to convince Scorpius to hide with him.

I loved the way McGonagall leaves the library, she’s assumed they want to spend time together and sort of announces it to them, like - I didn’t see you, I’m leaving, carry on boys. It was perfect. She isn’t putting any more effort into to keeping them apart, and has let them know this.

There’s also an extra psstt moment when they’re hiding from McGonagall, and I would need to see this again to work out if it’s just the same recording being repeated or a new one.

Dominic made the story of stealing James cloak into a bad joke to try and break the tension. The joke doesn’t work, obviously, but I like how he doesn’t know how to approach Scorpius after their fight and tries humour. He also seemed genuinely distressed that his dad had been keeping them apart.

The library hug was the most adorably awkward thing ever. I don’t know if people have noticed, but there’s a slight height difference between the Scorbus actors this year. This meant that Jon’s arms were sort of hanging awkwardly over Dominic in the hug.

Blythe as McGonagall is good. She’s a lot softer than Sandy, and I’m looking forward to seeing her change in Part 2 when she’s telling them all off. There are little things she does differently, I can’t remember them all. When she put away the map, she made it seem like it was the spell closing the map and not her just folding it up.

Lucy as Myrtle is great. If I’m honest, I was expecting to just miss April in this scene, but I really like Lucy. She’s still flirty and hilarious, but totally doing her own thing. The second time she cries, she sets the water off three times, Scorpius tries to interrupt her after the second time and she stops him so she can cry again. She also makes it seem like she’s intending to keep the boys secret, and that it’s only because it’s Harry asking her that she then tells them what they’re planning.

Kathryn’s Umbridge is also great, again I knew that from Broadway. I like how she’s just sweet on the surface but you can see the evil underneath. Her laugh is spot on.

One note about this cast, they are so noisy backstage. I was in the third row, but I still only usually hear the occasional noise. This was more than usual.

I’m sure I’ve forgotten loads, but I tried to focus mainly on the new actors and the changes. I enjoyed the show and can’t wait for Part 2 tonight.

#cursed child #harry potter and the cursed child #cursed child review #harry potter play

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hollowedsammy · 5 years

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Hello, hello, everyone! My name is Susie, I am 21-soon-to-be-22, I live in the EST timezone, and this is the first of my two characters, Sam! If you’d like to plot, like this or IM me! This contains his basic info, backstory, info about what he’s currently up to, some misc. information, a small playlist, tropes that apply to him, and wanted connections. Yeah... I went a little hard.

☾ ↪ cillian murphy, male, forty, he/him. ／ ❛ have you heard from samuel marx lately ？ yeah, the forty year old mechanic / drug dealer. pretty sure they’ve been here twenty years, and from what i’ve heard, sam can be kind of cynical & self-serving, but i caught them on a good day once, and they were pretty funny & clever. i’m probably overthinking it, but given all the crazy shit around here, i hope they’re okay. maybe they’re watching their favorite scary movie, i heard it’s child’s play.

trigger warnings: homophobia, parental/domestic abuse, self-harm, depression

BASIC INFORMATION

Full name: Samuel Joseph Marx

Nickname(s): Sam (everyone), Sammy (his mother, close friends, or significant others only)

Age: 40

Gender: male

Sexual orientation: bisexual

Birthday: January 12, 1956

Zodiac: Capricorn

Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw

Personality type: ISFJ

Family: Joseph Marx (father, deceased), Serafine Marx (mother, deceased)

Criminal record: shoplifting (3 counts), underage drinking (2 counts), auto theft (1 count), fraud (2 counts), possession with the intent to distribute (2 counts)

TROPES

Beware the Quiet Ones

Cornered Rattlesnake

The Cynic

Deadpan Snarker

Don’t You Dare Pity Me!

Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas

I Just Want to be Loved

I Need a Freaking Drink

Lower-Class Lout

Not Good With People

Perpetual Frowner

The Runaway

Smarter Than You Look

The Snark Knight

Sour Outside, Sad Inside

When He Smiles

FIVE-SONG PLAYLIST

“The Mute” by Radical Face

“Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked” by Cage the Elephant

“Run Boy Run” by Woodkid

“The Kids Aren’t Alright” by Fall Out Boy

“Emperor’s New Clothes” by Panic! at the Disco

BACKGROUND

Sam was born and raised in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. He had a small family -- just him, and his parents. His father was a police officer, and his mother was a housewife.

Sam never got along with his father. Never. He can’t remember a single time that he didn’t entirely despise the man.

Joseph Marx was a corrupt cop, as well as an abusive husband and father. The Marx household was frequently filled with the sounds of slamming doors, screamed profanity, and glass breaking. While he frequently took his anger out on his wife, Sam quickly became Joseph’s favorite target.

Sam was also a favored target of other kids. An incident during which two older boys held him under the water instilled an unshakable case of hydrophobia in him, and he was often beat up when teachers weren’t around. Many said he brought it on himself -- what did he expect, when he was so obviously queer, dressed in such ratty clothes, acted so strangely?

Unsurprisingly, he developed delinquent behavior early on, and was frequently in trouble for cheating on tests, stealing other students’ possessions, skipping class, smoking, drinking, and stealing cars for joyrides.

Bullied at school and abused at home, Sam had few friends, and spent as much time as possible out of the house. He’d wander the swamps and streets alone, only occasionally having a companion with him.

Finally, when he was sixteen, Sam hit a breaking point. A terrible fight with his father led to Sam being thrown into the kitchen window. The glass shattered, cutting into Sam’s skin. His mother tried to help him get cleaned up, but Sam had had enough. That very night, he packed a small bag and snuck out the back door. He stole a truck from one of his neighbors, and hit the road, never to return to Baton Rouge.

Lacking any sort of plan, Sam wandered from town to town, making money via odd jobs, shoplifting, pickpocketing, purse-snatching, and selling dime bags of weed. He had his fair share of scrapes with the law -- even spending six months in a correctional facility when he was eighteen -- but always managed to worm his way out any long-term consequences.

While in jail, Sam finally wrote to his mother -- now that he was eighteen, he couldn’t be forced to return to his family’s home, so he could assure her that he was alive. While he kept in contact with his mother from then on, Sam never spoke to his father again, and refused to ever return to Baton Rouge, even after his father was shot and killed in the line of duty.

ARRIVAL IN HOLLOWAY

Sam got to Holloway at the age of twenty. He only intended to stay for a couple weeks, long enough to make enough money to make a cross-country trip. The girl he was dating at the time went to school in Maine, and he wanted to go visit her.

When the first Hollow Man murder happened, a couple weeks after Sam’s arrival, he was nervous. When it became evident that there was a serial killer in Holloway, he started thinking maybe he should just say “fuck the money” and skip town altogether. However, before he could, the police were asking to talk to him.

It had been discovered that a couple of the deceased had bought drugs off of Sam a few times. While they hadn’t thought much about Sam at first, this caused the cops to look closer at him. Upon further digging, the investigators found that Sam was a drifter who had dropped out of school and run away from home, had a history of behavior issues, an ever-growing rap sheet, a brief stint in jail to his name, a skittish and antisocial air about him, and an obvious hatred of cops.

Yeah. It did not look good.

Sam was interrogated many times. His story never changed. He did sell weed to two of the deceased. No, he didn’t hurt them. He never even interacted with them beyond the sales. He was asleep at the time of the murders. No, no one can confirm that, he was alone. No, he doesn’t have a hotel room, he’s been sleeping in his truck.

Despite a lack of solid evidence or a motive, Sam was still a prime suspect for the first few murders, and he was told not to leave town. Knowing it’d look much worse if he ran, Sam decided to get a job -- partially because he was stuck in Halloway for the foreseeable future, and partially because he knew he might have to hire a lawyer soon. He eventually persuaded the local auto shop to hire him as a mechanic. (Accused of murder or not, Sam is damn good with cars.)

No official charges were ever brought, and eventually, another murder took place while Sam had a clear alibi, having been drinking in a local bar in full view of at least a dozen people all night. He got busted for having a fake ID, but at least he wasn’t an official murder suspect anymore.

Key word being official. Some suspected that Sam had an accomplice, and that the whole thing was a set-up to clear his name. Despite rumors, whispers, stares, and even a few people accusing him of the crime to his face, he always maintained that he never hurt anybody.

After being cleared, Sam intended to get out of town as soon as he could. But then, the girlfriend in Maine he’d been planning to go see dumped him... via postcard. It was the cherry on top of what had been a shitty few weeks.

Sam decided to stay for a little while until he figured out where to go next. He was rather enjoying having a steady paycheck for once, and it wasn’t like he had a plan. “A little while” eventually turned to twenty years.

NOWADAYS

Sam has now lived in a half-double in town for many, many years. It’s small, but he makes it work.

While most have probably abandoned the idea that Sam killed anybody, he’s still not exactly Mr. Popular in town. He’s known to be a sarcastic, self-centered dick, who has no respect for authority. (Some things never change.)

He still works at the auto shop. The original owner’s son runs it now, but Sam is the longest-standing employee, as well as the best mechanic.

Sam still hates cops. If he could refuse service to them, he would.

He’s still selling weed on the side (his boss looks the other way -- so long as Sam doesn’t get busted while at work, he doesn’t really care), and can be bribed into purchasing alcohol for underage students. However, he refuses to get mixed up in anything harder than that.

He mostly keeps to himself, and isn’t known to be particularly violent. If someone else attacks him, he’ll defend himself, but he rarely throws the first punch.

He’s been in an even more melancholy mood than normal lately, because his mother died last month.

He honestly thought the Hollow Man business was behind him. But now that a new victim has been found, he can feel people looking at him sideways again.

And, no matter how much he says he doesn’t care what other people think... he doesn’t like it at all.

MISC.

Sam’s sexuality is not public knowledge. He’s not ashamed of it, but he also wants to avoid harassment, so he’s only ever openly dated women. The only people who know are men he’s been with in the past, and maybe, maybe a very close friend.

Despite his dislike of people, Sam is quite fond of animals, and even adopted a stray cat he found a couple years ago. He’s named him Hecate, and he is quite possibly the ugliest cat in existence -- he has one eye, crooked fangs, and scratches everything that isn’t Sam.

Sam suffers clinical depression, but is in denial about how serious it actually is. It’s driven him to make some pretty damaging decisions, and he’s had a habit of burning himself with cigarettes since high school. The scars are all over his shoulders, arms, and stomach.

Sam was -- and still is -- a frequent target of classism. Due to his lack of education and working-class background, many assume the worst in him, and many underestimate his intelligence. While he uses it to his advantage, he is irked by it.

It surprises people to learn that Sam is actually very well-read, and a talented actor. In another life, he could’ve joined a Shakespeare company. In this one, he reads passages aloud to himself when he’s alone.

Sam claims to hate... well, everyone, but he holds a special contempt for bullies and abusers. One of the only times Sam’s been known to instigate a fight is when he got sick of listening to a drunk guy catcall a woman walking by, and just decked him.

Sam still hates water, and refuses to go swimming -- on the rare occasions he has to go near the water, he won’t put his head under.

Sam has a pitch-black sense of humor. The Hollow Man murders are one of the few things he won’t joke about.

SUGGESTED CONNECTIONS

Someone who still believes Sam was or is the Hollow Man.

Related to the above, some of the younger characters have probably been told by their parents to stay away from Sam. Whether or not they listened is up to you.

Friend with benefits.

Exes.

Someone who has become aware of Sam’s depression and is trying to help him -- whether he likes it or not.

Unrequited crush (from either party).

And anything else you can think of!

#hollowfm.intro

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viralhottopics · 7 years

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‘Rugrats’ Characters Ranked By Betchiness

For this weeks TBT, were going to take a look into the lives of the most influential baby friend group of the ’90s. Im talking, of course, about the Rugrats and, most importantly, how betchy or not betchy each Rugrat is. Is it polite to rank toddlers who have not yet learned to speak based on arbitrary social categories? Probs not. Is it fun? Fucking duh.

1. Cynthia

Heres what we know about Cynthia: 1) Shes a really cool dancer, 2) Shes got cool moves (as long as you move her arms and legs), 3) Shes movin out on the floor, 4) Shes ready to break some eggs (make an omelette Cynthia!) How do we know all this? We know it from her workout tape, which I am shocked has not been sampled by Avicii or Kanye or someone yet (dont listen unless you want this song stuck in your head all day).

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Cynthias resting bitch face is on point, and she manages to look great in her belted orange dress despite the fact that she is missing of her hair. Cynthia didnt say or do shit for all 9 seasons of, yet she is still one of the shows most memorable characters, and it is her ability to do no work and remain popular that has earned her the number one slot.

2. Susie Carmichael

Susie Carmichael is cool AF. Did Susie need to appear in every episode? No. Susie had other shit to do. Shell check in every once in awhile to see what the babies are up to, teach them about Kwanzaa and generally let them know whats good, before going back next door to hang with her real friends. Whenever she does come over, the babies flip out because theyre like, obsessed with her (everyone is). Shes also the only person who has absolutely no time for Angelicas bullshit, probably because Susie has better hair, a better outfit, and wears a cool red bangle, which is more than Angelica could ever hope to have. Susie is three, which makes her older and wiser than most of the babies and probably accounts for the sheer lack of fucks she has to give. Did Susie get her ass lost in the woods when Dil was born? Fuck no, she was chilling in Paris getting turnt up with her older sister! Did Susie almost die with the Rugrats in EuroReptarland? No bitch, I just told you shes already been to Paris! Susie Carmichael always comes correct, and thats what earned her the number two spot.

3. Tommy Pickles

Tommy Pickles is the star of the show, which virtually guarantees him betchiness. Tommy also has the whole dressing like a slut thing down and spends all nine seasons of wearing nothing but a crop top and booty shorts. His outfit never stops him from leading his friend group on adventures, and you know once he can talk and operate a phone hed be the person managing the group chat, suggesting what clubs and parties to go to, making sure everyone is getting the free shots they deserve, and seeing you into your Uber at the end of the night. The thing holding Tommy back from the top spot is that hes too fucking nice. Hell let any baby with shit in their diaper come hang with him (cough CHUCKIE cough), and that means his friend group is riddled with duds (HI CHUCKIE). Be a little more discerning about your friend group, Thomas, and maybe well see you up at the top with Cynthia.

4. Angelica Pickles

We cant talk about Cynthia without getting to her BFF and designated Rugrat BSCB, Angelica Pickles. Angelica spent most of torturing the dumb babies (who were really only like a year younger than her) and making them miserable, yet still somehow being invited to all the group hangs, play dates, and brunches. Angelica spends a lot of time telling everyoneincluding the adultshow beautiful she is and is absolutely desperate for attention, probably because her rich AF parents never pay attention to her. Shes your friend who cries and starts shit at the club anytime she feels like shes not the hottest girl there (and she frequently is notthanks Cynthia!) Also girl, lay off the cookies.

5. Charlotte Pickles

Charlotte Pickles is Angelicas mom who is literally always on her phone. Like, always. Even in a time before cellphones could fit in your pocket, Charlotte is always on the phone with her assistant Jonathan (Cheban? We dont know) and ignores basically every member of her family to do so. When phones dont work, Charlotte straight up makes her husbands brother carry a fax machine around so she doesnt miss any important texts. Charlotte alternates between a power suit and workout gear, always accompanied by an Ariana Grande level high ponytail. In , Charlotte displays clear signs of some seriously botched cosmetic surgery, which is what has dropped her down to slot #5. Never try to cut corners on botox, Charlotte! Itll always go wrong. Honestly, Jonathan should have told you that.

6. Grandpa Lou

Grandpa Lou is another character who gives absolutely zero fucks and is down to hang. Much like Corinne, Lou loves naps and often falls asleep halfway through finishing his stories. Despite his old age, Lou is still a fuckboy, and is often seen hitting on women and generally trying to find ways to get laid. If had taken place in 2017, Lou would have definitely had a Tinder and that Tinder definitely would have had a picture of him from 20+ years earlier. Lou is eventually successful in finding a new wife, Lulu, who he moves in with pretty fast after they start hooking up (risky choice, Lou!) Outside of his strangely active love life, Lou also has many frenemies, including his own cousin Miriam; his bowling rival, Billy Strike Maxwell; and some other wrestling guy named Conan McNulty. This proves that when push comes to shove, Lou is just not very popular and kind of an old perv. Sixth place for you, Lou.

7. Phil And Lil Deville

Okay Im sorry, but Phil and Lil are fucking gross. Their diet is a mess, always eating fucking worms and mud and shit. Do you know how many calories are in a ball of worms, kids? Do you? Seriously. There is a episode where Phil and Lil drink straight-up toilet water. What the fuck is that? Is that something babies do? Phil and Lil also have no creativity when it comes to fashion, and instead just dress alike every damn day in greena color that is flattering on exactly 0 people. Their mom is a hardcore feminist, which is cool, but maybe the twins have been empowered to do a little bit too much. Like sure, Lil can do whatever she wants with her life, but maybe eating a giant pile of shit should not be one of those things? Idk. Seventh place.

8. Stu Pickles

Good Lord is Stu Pickles a sad man. Seriously. You have a beautiful house, two healthy babies, a cool Jewish wife who has managed to maintain her pre-baby body, and youre still fucking complaining! Look around, asshole! You have all this shit despite the fact that your dumb ass hasnt invented one successful toy. In fact, you havent even invented one toy that didnt explode and almost kill your entire family. You are literally #blessed but youre too blind to see it! The only thing keeping you from the bottom slot is this meme which, in the current political climate, is legit all of our lives right now:

9. Chuckie Finster

No. Just no. Im sorry, but again, its gonna be a hard pass on Chuckie. Here are all the things Chuckie would have to improve if he ever even wanted to hope to be betchy. 1) His voice, which is terrible. Do you have a cold, Chuckie? Go to the damn doctor. Its the ’90s. Hillary Clinton has passed the State Childrens Health Insurance Plan. You can go to the doctor. Go. 2) Grow. A. Pair. Dude. You know when Chuckie gets older hes gonna be your friend who calls the cops on his own party for getting out of hand. Hes gonna be that guy who side eyes you for doing molly at Coachella, making weird comments under his breath about how you never know whats in that stuff and generally bringing bad vibes despite the fact that Beyonc is literally pregnant and dancing in front of you. 3) The hair is a problem. Comb it. Dye it. Do something. Its a problem. 4) Tie your fucking shoes, dude. 9th place.

10. Chas Finster

There was no character on television from 1991-2004 that was less betchy than Chas Finster. He has all of Chuckies problems, but he is a fucking adult which means he has literally no excuse for being such a narc. Chas seems to be suffering from whatever health problems are affecting his son, and despite being a bureaucrat, apparently has no ability to get his ass to a doctor either. Like many sad old nerds, Chas must travel to a foreign country to find a wife, eventually convincing a way-too-hot-for-him Japanese woman to fly to America and be his Melania. Chas also has a double-Hitler mustache, which is 100% unacceptable, no matter what decade you live in. Sorry, Chas. Last place.