#also i'm aware we had this convo after a week of knowing each other

[ocean-anchored]

Continued still.. December 3, 2023

Monday night I went to the Knights & flames game with Shane, he got really great tickets & I got to wear my jersey. It was a nice evening, he was good & I had asked him before not to ask me if Im ok at any point to trigger my emotional mess. Chrystal was gone the week so I was going into okotoks everyday to cover. Tuesday I originally didn't have plans but then Connor asked to hang out after work. Went for Taco tuesday which was nice then back to his place. I ended up staying the night, I felt like he wanted me to stay but idk, I still can't get a read on him. Part of me just thinks we're kind of doing the same thing to each other. I mean I know i'm not really going out of my way to ask him or make plans but his texting just sucks that I can't read if he wants to or not. Like its hard to keep any convo up over text & maybe he's just like that, I understand his work is a lot so keeping that up is tough, but then after we talked about how I might not be doing a roadtrip in January it died off & he didn't reply so whatever. I mean he has asked to hang out so I assume, & he does ask me to stay so maybe? But to what benefit? Idk. I do enjoy his company though. Wednesday I went for dinner with Ed & Mariana a founder of ours from Mexico city. Ill have to write another time on how I had planned to do a road trip down to the states or mexico for a few weeks but I dont think it's going to work out in January so I'll talk about it later for now. Went to Charbar which was really great, nice environment & cool, really great food. Thursday I finally had a night to myself, I was pretty tired from the week & had a lot this weekend so I chilled & gamed for a bit, took it easy. Friday had lunch with Ed, again I might talk about that later but I'm still really blessed to be working with him. Friday night was my ugly christmas sweater games night which I think turned out really well! 9 people including me, jeremiah brought his friend Dan, steven, amanda, shane who came 2 hours late... that was another whole other story of annoyance & triggering for me, Kamber, amber & naythan. It was fun, started around 6/6:30 & everyone stayed till like midnight so it was a lot of fun. Saturday I chilled for day, Marc forgot about our facetime which sucks but whatever. Was supposed to go to anneriekes to decorate the tree but didn't want to be around that environment again which I think I forgot to mention anyways that I went for dinner two weeks ago & it was just a lot to take in & I'm tired of talking about Steve. Anyway I went to amber & naythans instead with nova, nova did so good with Rue, it was honestly so sweet watching nova play again & be so gentle with her, made me so happy. We played catan & had a really great night. Amber also got me the exit game advent calendar that were all in a challenge together, like 4 of us couples minus mine of course & that's super fun so far, proud that I've solved the first two alone with no hints! Anyways, love those people so much. Today, sunday, went to 8:30am service which was so good again. I really love this church I think & want to stay in it. Its so lively & actually makes me want to lean into God when I leave & "sets my heart on fire" again feeling. Went to brunch with Daniel at Diner Deluxe which was great again, he's a good guy. Hes really smart & very... aware. Its a breath of fresh air & its really nice to be able to talk to someone emotionally on the same page especially about relationships & the struggles. Then mom surprised me at being at my house after so we could go for a walk & we had some good conversation. Then went to a movie with steven & amanda which was good so im finally relaxing now winding down for bed. This week will be busy again & the weekend but then it get's quiet which I think Im finally looking forward too.

#personal #dear future self #life update #dearfutureself #monthly update

[embossross]

ahhh hi hi i'm here with thoughts about the new chap hehe

ok first, i LOVE this line so much. i can kind of see it now - the similarities between reader and hanma, but at the same time they are so so different. i'm not sure why but this stood out to me! there were also many lines like this thru out the chap - i do pay attention to details bc i know some writers have a bunch of foreshadowing in their fics👀

another thing is that i literally GASPED when a certain violet haired man made an approach in this fic, im guessing it was ran but i was so happy to have him in this fic!! (i don't think it was actually mentioned if it was ran or rin, but i'm p sure it was ran ahah) i rly liked the entire encounter and he was being pretty respectful which i didn't see coming lol.

yknow i loved this entire convo so much there was a lot thrown at us but at the same time you described/phrased it in such a way that made it easier to understand. i think i re read this part like 3 times; i kinda felt like this is the most honest convo they’ve had and it was the most series imo. it was really nice seeing hanma kinda open up. we also got to know more about the docs past too.

the last line about minimizing pain for the reader 👀 idk if im being dumb or if this has some sort of deeper meaning, but is it talking about the docs emotional pain? (towards hanma maybe?) im not sure lol rip and maybe it’ll be cleared up within the next few chapters but for now i’ll be left wondering hehe

okoki this is getting so so long i’m so sorry BUT i reallyyyy wanna talk about the smut i was literally vibrating in my seat the entire time aksdj when i first read the chap tags i kinda saw where it was going. club - hanma get head - reader watches. BUT OMG I DIDNT expect the reader to join in??!AND THE EYE CONTACT? deceased. i had to put my phone down a few times bc it was just THAT good ahaha. you really write such good smut it leaves my brain all mushy (that kakucho fie lives in my head rent free btw.)

OK IM FINISHED. i’m really sorry if this was annoying but i genuinely love this fic so much and your writing as well!!!! your fics are perfect for analysis and every chap keeps me thinking ahah but thanks again for sharing your wonderful work with us!!! have an amazing week!! (i’ve also read the devotion of the girl in the mirror again but was too nervous to send an ask rip)

this is the kind of comment/ask that really means the world to me 💖 it feels like so much more than i could ever ask for. so thank you so sincerely! i was stuck on the next chapter for both stories, and after reading this, i sat down and edited 2k words and broke the writers' block. THANK YOU 🥰

the fact that you screenshotted lines that really resonated!!!!! nothing could be less annoying!!! i'm giving you a long response right back because this is so much good stuff to react to!!!

one of my favorite lines from the chapter too! And yeah, reader + hanma are so different from each other, but i think they have a pretty similar problem with how they move through the world. they never could have had this conversation before. they're only able to be this open now because a) they both think they're talking more big picture and not being fully aware of what they're revealing about themselves; but most importantly b) they have a CREEPING INTIMACY! they are so much closer than they were a few chapters back :) I am so glad you noticed that because it was Very intentional.

you pretty much nailed the pain comment. Reader recognizes that she is taking on a very out of character risk with the Hanma stuff, and that opens her up to emotional pain but also risk that he's going to make her (or her life) change, which she is resistant to.

not much to say about the smut stuff other than...i am glad to see it's working. that is what i was going for 😏😆 (also thank you on the kakucho fic :))

it means the WORLD that you find things to analyze and think about because i am pouring so much of that in there intentionally, and knowing that people see it and get something out of it too is Super motivating. You are more than welcome to send me nice asks on any story any time (in fact, i'm begging lol jk)

#literally insanely kind and nice and so grateful wow #like woww #read more because i said a lot #i love you for this so much #asks