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crossinggalaxies · 6 years

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Why That Episode was AWFUL

Okay here we go. There’s going to be a lot of things you don’t agree with probably in this post. So let me preface this by saying I don’t intend to argue. I’m also very well aware that this is my opinion and not fact. I also would like to warn you, as you can probably tell by the title that this is going to be INCREDIBLY NEGATIVE. So if you are easily affected by negative talk, enjoyed the episode, or want to debate; don’t read the post.

So let me start off by saying that when I say that the episode was AWFUL I mean the writing. It’s sooo hard to critique AOS and say anything that they create is bad because the ACTORS are so good that they make everything seem GOOD even when it’s not.

Even now my brain, on some level, is trying to convince me that it wasn’t that bad of an episode because the ACTORS (especially Iain tonight -HOLY SHIT) were soooo fucking good that it almost doesn’t compute with the shitty storytelling it was attached to.

I want to also mention that the first 40 minutes of the show seemed good, but ultimately forgettable due to how BADDD the last 20 were and that is when you know you DONE FUCKED UP.

But at the end of it all when I look at the script, ignoring the excellent, performances, I see that the writing was absolutely horrible. And below I will explain why.

I also want to preface this by also saying as a writer myself there is a few things that make a story/writing (whether it’s for a book, show, movie, or what have you) good in my eyes. 1. I absolutely believe you need to tell a story for yourself. You should write something you needed growing up (you probably still need it now). You should write something you find important. And in return you should hardly ever write for your audience. (Side note this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t say for instance include gay characters. You should always try to write inclusively but not because it’s what your audience needs or wants but because it’s what ACTUAL life and humanity looks like. AKA representation matters). What I do mean when I say that you shouldn’t write for your audience is that you should write an authentic story that resonates with you and stems from a place that means something.

Btw writing for your audience doesn’t just mean writing happy/good things (IE FAN SERVICE) I also mean writing things for your audience like that purely for shock value because you know it’s what is going to get at your viewers (which is what they did, ie emotional manipulation) and cause a reaction. Ultimately you should never write just to cause a reaction. It should mean more.

2. A good writer in my book is someone who can write something that generates a response in their audience BUT NOT because it was their single goal to do so but because they authentically wrote something that meant something to them in a way that worked and their audience could feel it because of this authenticity. And tonight that wasn’t there.

To me this episode 100 percent was about writing to create shock value and showcased so little care for the actual story that they for the longest time seemed to be excellently and authentically writing. (They botched this last small half of the season and here’s why)

Deke’s Speech on Fixing the Team:

I was super conflicted about Deke’s speech to Daisy on needing to mend the team. On one hand I loved it because FUCKING FINALLY and also I 100 percent agree. But on the other hand looking at it now that the episode is done I think it was all about generating a reaction and not about story telling. For the longest time now I've been wondering why they haven't started this process of healing an episode or two earlier. And now I understand that they put it off until the last moment to increase the overall tension and reaction from the audience. It has felt incredibly out of character for the team not to be concerned about fixing things a little earlier (ie getting their shit together) than just the last episode. So while I am glad that they started the mending process it annoys me that they held it off until the last moment just to raise the stakes and make the audience feel more. Ultimately I think waiting until the last moment to raise such stakes made the pacing of the story a little off in the last section, which happens when you (in my opinion don’t write from an authentic place.)

Deke

I don’t even know where to start so lets just start with our old pal Deke. Deke became an amazing character because at first most of us really didn’t like him. However he became so important and integral to the story. And in my eyes he became a large voice of reason. The thing I loved most about him this season was watching him and his relationship with Jemma grow. It was so emotional and well done and I connected so deeply with it.

So you can imagine how LIVID I am with how he disappeared and literally no one says anything. It was completely OOC for the group but mostly for Jemma to not even acknowledge his absence and here to me is one of the largest sightings of shock value writing in this episode.

YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY NO ONE MENTIONED HIM?

Because the writers wanted you to feel the shock of his absence and in having someone speak of him it would have taken away from that.

Had someone mentioned him, or the potential for search for him... that could have possibly stripped away from the emotion/shock you were feeling for his absence. So despite the fact that it didn’t serve the story, it created what felt like a strange and OOC reaction from the group and namely Jemma, they went with it anyways because they were more concerned with the shock value. This to me served as one of the larger indicators that they were writing for shock over story telling and it damaged the episode in the process.

Phil

Oh okay. So he’s dying. But they’re just gonna chill on a beach, all smiles all is good. Man Idk I just felt like Phalinda as a couple and individuals deserved more. Also as much as I love this couple. Can I just say I’m a bit bitter. That they’ve been together for .3 seconds and would have still had a better happier ending to the entirety of the show, than a couple who’s literally suffered for 5 years. Like how the hell does that make any storytelling sense? Anyway.

Fitz

There's a lot of reasons for why I hated everything regarding his story in this last episode. Here is the most important though.

His death was bullshit: literally dude just got crushed by rocks. (Shock value much??) You know I've mentioned numerous times before that on a large level I thought that they might kill him. But even in that pit of despair centered thought I believed they would at least give him a hero's death. Believe me I know he is a hero. But that death was nowhere near what he deserved story wise. I thought that if he died he would at least have a speech/line that resonated with his death and life/purpose. Where his death would somehow have something good involved, like a sacrifice for something greater. You know a through and through heroes death? But no they didn't do anything for him. Like we have to authentically acknowledge as an audience and fan base that he's dead.

100 PERCENT DEAD.

I don't care if there is a frozen version of him floating around in space. The Fitz that we know, the Fitz that we saw grow this season is gone and dead. All those milestones - erased. (Which side note it pisses me off how much they hyped up how much the wedding meant and how excited Clarke was to get to produce it to literally just scrub it away for shock value).

Trauma: Let’s not also forget how not only did they not heal the framework Trauma but they exacerbated it and he died with those traumas unresolved and in my opinion worsened. His death ensures that that version of him that we knew and loved will never find resolution for such traumas. We have been waiting and begging for them to touch on and began to heal the trauma. But they LITERALLY brought it back and made it worse and then killed him with it unresolved.

SOOO ultimately, I was really SHOCKED that they didn’t give him the death that he deserved. Instead they had him die in some shocking random twist with unresolved trauma, the erasure of some of the HUGEST milestones of his life, no scene with the person he loved or moments of purpose just to get a rise from the audience. He didn’t get to say anything of value when he died. He didn’t get to see Jemma when he died. We have to acknowledge that all this is gone.

Let me just reiterate that again. HE HAD TO DIE WITH UNRESOLVED TRAUMA. (Also I bet your ass that CryoFitz for some reason doesn’t have any issues with the Doctor/Split and they will just use this earlier version of him to sweep away their lack of trauma mending under the rug.) Concerned about loopholes much?

Loop holes: Speaking of loopholes they totally used his death so they don’t have to go into detail on fixing his relationships with the other characters because the version of him they may find in space will have done nothing ‘wrong’ yet. (baddddd writing)

Also just another example of the shock value writing is the entirety of his death scene. Let me explain just how much they wrote these scenes just to fuck with us. So when stuff starts going haywire and the rocks fall the audience is in shock because clearly Fitz might be hurt or even worse dead. So you're brought into this feeling of intense shock as a viewer but then soon after that scene you see his hand come up through the rubble and you experience relief. You calm. Things seem okay. Until the soundtrack creeps in and he says he thinks he broke his leg, and the music deepens and you realize something is wrong. And you see the wound. And you are brought back to SHOCK. And its rising and rising. And he dies. But you look at your clock and you see there's 15 minutes left. There is time to fix it. So you relax a little. But then the show comes back on and you realize he's dead when you see Jemma’s reaction. And you feel SHOCK again. And you're crying and crying. And you see somebody wiping a plaque that says in memory (remembrance?) of but they're not showing the whole thing and then Jemma makes a comment about Fitz being interested in hearing the story that time can indeed be changed (or something along those lines) and for a second again you think he's alive and the shock dissipates. Maybe he faked his death. Maybe this is the plan. Why? Who knows. But then you realize she’s talking about CRYOFitz and the shock comes back.

THEY WERE EMOTIONALLY FUCKING WITH US for so long. I am honestly infuriated at this fact and it deepens every time I realize they thought this would be okay as a show ender. But mostly I’m infuriated over the fact that just they seemed to care so little about leaving us with a story that mattered and instead how much they valued leaving us with a story that left us shocked. Here’s a note to all writers. You may think shock value is more memorable. It’s not. It’s tiring and overused. And just leaves people bitter.

So if they were writing for shock value, they hit the nail on the head and knocked it out of the park. But shock value doesn’t resonate with me. At the end of the day. They killed a character off in a half assed way, erased his milestones, left him with unresolved trauma, allowed him no scenes with his wife, all to get a reaction out of an audience that could have had this as the last thing they ever saw of the show and ultimately they hella butchered the story in the process. (They should honestly thank they're lucky stars they got another season and can fix this.)

ALSO FRIENDLY REMINDER AGAIN THIS WAS ALL A POSSIBLE SHOW FINALE! THE FUCK??

Bruised Friendship: Also can we have knowledge that this Fitz that we know and loved who 100% died in this episode also did so being still at odds ends with his family/friends. Like the last things said between him and Mack in their one on one, or him and Daisy, never got resolved. Fitz died not knowing if Jemma was okay. He died not getting one more minute with her. He died not knowing if the rest of the team who wasn’t there in his last moments was alive. He died not knowing if Earth and humanity was going to be okay. But he also died not being on the best terms with his family/friends (at least not in the ways he has been throughout the show). He literally got SOOOO FUCKING JIPPED. Like YOU GAVE HIM NOTHING. YOU KILLED HIM BUT YOU EVEN HALF ASSED THAT.

Separation: I want to say that while I was shocked I was not surprised that they FS separated. But there is one main difference I want to point out. While I never liked any of the separations they went through you could always count on and believe that we would then see (VISUALLY SEE) Fitzsimmons overcome it and come out of it better, closer, and stronger. So a large part of my brain and I think mostly everybody else’s brains knew on some level they would be separated again. But they separated them again, this time, in the most final way possible. With death. Like honestly they have done this so much it shouldn’t have shocked us that they did it again only in a way more permanent fashion. And in a way that had no visual payment.

Reaction: What the fuck was that reaction from everyone. They seemed to basically be like. Yeah it’s sad but there’s frozen Fitz somewhere, so oh well.

BUT THIS EPISODE. WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN A SHOW FINALE ended with him dying and a 2 minute speech at the end promising to try to find him. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN OUR ENDING. A SPEECH?????? And just a bunch of shock. Like what a horrible ending that would have been. I’m tired of speeches. The poetic promise of trying to do something pales in comparison to seeing people outlive their trauma and survive. Stop telling me things might be okay. Show me for once, and mean it. Honestly such heartless and lazy writing.

Ultimately i’m just astounded that they knew this could’ve been the end and they thought it was still satisfying. And not because it was a story that mattered but because you would remember it, because you were shocked. All in all (might as well use an essay transition sense this is long AF) I don’t like shows that write for shock value. I have an issue with it because it makes everything lose meaning and authenticity. And that’s what this was. I mean I cant tell if I’m happy about the year wait or not. On one hand I can distance myself from it, and learn to care less so next time they fuck it up, it hurts less. But also a year with the imagery of him senselessly dying and the knowledge that everything good this season has disappeared with it just to close some fucking loopholes has me feeling some kind of anger I haven’t felt in a long ass time.

#aos negativity #negativity #phalinda negativity #fitzsimmons

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monsterinamusicbox · 4 years

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You should already know this from the guidelines but it’s important to repeat it: I’m writing from Jemma’s pov, and Jemma is NOT okay. So how she reads the world is a mix of things that actually happened and how her already struggling mind perceived them, a result of the way they all piled up together: self-hatred, guilt, some actual hostility from the others and misunderstandings. Which leads to changes because this is the AU where she got bitter.

***

NAME: Jemma Anne Simmons BIRTH DATE: September 11, 1987 ETHNICITY: Jewish GENDER: cis female ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL ORIENTATION: demi-hetero-romantic (requires a very strong bond, she has trouble reading her own feelings and distinguishing romantic love from platonic) heterosexual. RELIGION: atheist SPOKEN LANGUAGES: English, British and American Sign Languages, Italian, some Spanish, Latin. (oddly good with accents) RELATIONSHIPS: many hook ups, two failed attempts to see men for more than a couple of times (with Milton it lasted two months, that's her longest relationship). At first neglected by her mother and cared for by her father, once her potential was more clear Jemma was emotionally abused and pushed to her limits by the woman while her father was the one neglecting her due to his work; that's when she developed an exaggerated sense of responsibility/guilt. She raised her little sister, while her older brother hated her due to jealously, and she had a grandmother until 12 and the house staff try to take care of her as much as possible. INTELLIGENCE: canonically a super genius, able to have 2 PHDs when sixteen, to remember engineering-related codes years later even if she’s not an actual engineer, perform surgery and with an incredible memory especially when feelings are involved.

***

Jemma was taught by her father, as a child, to put all her troubles away, inside her music box, and she kept doing so as she grew up. All the traumas, all the anger she didn’t feel she had the right to let out, all the pain, got repressed because there were more important things to think about, because her friends were the ones'really suffering' and not her, and simply because she never learned how to process and deal with it. But the system stopped working and Jemma started feeling like a villain while simultaneously wanting to fight against the people who didn’t help her and, worse, misjudged her and the kind of dangerous person she could be. The more she uses questionable methods and is aggressive to people, the more she convinces herself she’s lost. And the more she convinces herself she’s lost, the more she makes herself do questionable things. She has conflicting feelings about Fitz, she expects Coulson to be against her and is preemptively antagonistic with him, May and Daisy were more or less on her side so she's ready to die for them, Mack and Bobbi were nearly strangers she never got close to but who betrayed her when she already had enough of SHIELD so they are no friends, Hunter is equally a stranger but he never did anything against her or the team so she's not feeling anything special in a good or bad way for him, and she didn't get to meet any new teammate. She doesn't have the healthiest life-style, has mood swings at times, also due to sleep deprivation, and deep down is in desperate need of being told that she's fine the way she is.

So, this is the version of her backstory for who doesn’t need a full recap of the first two seasons of aos. Long but it explains the turns her mind took to get to that darker place, I bolded parts to help you 'skip' the least important bits if you can't read too much at once:

Jemma had PTSD as well as survivor guilt and an already exaggerate sense of guilt in general. Considered herself responsible for Fitz’s brain damage in particular and everything that came with it: for his frustration, when he got angry she took it as a personal failure, she watched him struggle to be better and suffered, she hated when she couldn't finish his sentences but also knew she was slowing down his recovery by doing things for him to keep him from being angry at himself, and felt responsible for not finding a way to make things work. She was falling apart and ran away, undercover, to save him from herself and not for her own health, which instead needed some safe and quiet and not be isolated in enemy territory to avoid getting worse. And after coming back to the base, she finds herself isolated again, and learns that people actually assumed the worst of her, as well as talking about it with the new guys while she was gone. She was already thinking the worst of herself, and finding out that the people who tried to see the good in everyone else believed she’d be capable of abandoning her best friend because he wasn’t 'good enough' was already a bad hit. And not only she couldn’t voice her own reasons and pains because unable to communicate her feelings, but was aware that telling Fitz she had left because his recovery was slower thanks to the pressure he puts on himself to work better with her, and because she made him worse, would make Fitz feel even more guilty and ‘useless’, and do nothing good.

She was mostly alone, once again, even if surrounded by people she knew as opposed to undercover in Hydra, and not a comfortable kind of alone. She overworked and even when repressing her emotions she had to hid to cry often. Skye was facing her own tragedies but did try to show some support and Jemma was thankful for it, but much like May who was equally impartial and close, Jemma didn’t get to see her much anymore; Bobbi was there less than two months before she turned out to be part of another faction, too little time to be nothing but just a friendly acquaintance to Jemma. Her betrayal was still anger-inducing, especially since she brought up Fitz to try to get her out of the locker room, but Jemma wasn’t trusting her with her life before either. The real last straw after all the self-hatred, all the anger she felt for Ward, all the assumptions the others made, the isolation, the inability to fix things with Fitz, and even Trip’s death and watching Raina slaughter her team in Porto Rico with her new powers, was realizing that Fitz had hidden Skye’s powers from her, expecting her to be capable of hurting their friend. It wasn't something she'd hold against Skye, at least not with anger, because she understood Skye was scared out of her mind, but it did make her doubt Skye's trust in her.

Jemma believed she deserved many bad things, she believed she also deserved Fitz’s anger for leaving, for being the cause of his suffering and unable to make it better. But while she’d let anyone berate her over the things she had done, she refused to accept being seen as someone who could hurt one of her best friends, especially because ‘different’. Her concern had always been alien viruses, like the one that had infected her, and Skye’s potential death, not that Skye would be ‘different’. That, and it did start to feel like everyone beside May was closer to Fitz and mostly thought of her as part of the Fitz/Simmons duo.

And that’s what brought the canon divergence, because the music box cracked, and she started feeling all the anger, the need to attack and fight, the need to defend herself, while simultaneously giving up on proving she was worth of their friendship, giving up on trying to be better, to be good, and just start letting out some bitterness, some sarcasm. She started feeling she didn’t have a place in shield anymore, and didn’t get closer to Fitz through gossip and small attempts of reconciliation before and after the attack from the other faction of SHIELD, but kept distance and animosity. She still felt she deserved the anger over being the cause of his brain damage and the suffering after, but nothing else beside that. She was far more aggressive with the other faction of shield, but May voiced her wish to protect her and gave Jemma a bit more will to stay and fight. After all, Skye was still out there and Jemma wasn’t giving up on her either. Upon finding out that Skye’s powers were natural for her, that she was part alien, Jemma was at peace with her change. Later on that day she tried to kill Ward and got Bakshi instead, and even tried to get Ward to shoot her. Fitz, not knowing the details, but with good intentions told her that it was okay if she couldn’t try to kill Ward, he wasn't able to really try kill him even if he wanted to either, it just meant they weren’t like him. And Jemma pointed out that she did try to kill him and was kicking herself for failing, the next bad things Ward did were going to be her responsibility. If anything, Fitz’s comforting words were a reminder that she was, in fact, not at all like Fitz and the rest of the team. At that point, she accepted that she was more than capable of killing and felt nothing about murdering Bakshi. She was different, and if she had stayed in the team it would likely because she could bring that to the table, and dirty her hands so that people like Fitz or Skye wouldn’t have to. Do what was needed, even when technically there were other options. But she didn’t want to stay, because the team, minus May and Skye with their vocal support, and still in Skye’s case with some doubt about Skye’s feelings, felt like a team of strangers now. And she felt she was always going to be the bad guy to them, and worse, the kind of bad guy she actually wasn’t, as opposed to the one she had embraced being.

But just as she meant to leave, she took a curious look at the Monolith and got transported to an alien planet. It was a new kind of hell (and while she had no hold backs, no intention of dating anyone, she wasn't the nicest to Will either so 'getting together' was still sparked by the need for some sort of comfort, only one month before leaving Maveth, and she wasn't in love with himb. But naturally cared enough to want to save him), and when she came back she was surprised to learn that Fitz had fought so hard to rescue her even with the bleak turn their friendship had taken - not so surprised that the others had given up even before finishing to follow all the leads.

At first it was heartwarming, but the disconnection between the two of them, especially with the way she had changed, more to the point, less delicate, too tired to be anything but who she felt, was all too obvious. And the bitterness grew as she realized that the rest of the team seemed to be worrying more about Fitz’s feelings over her relationship with Will and harder personality than about her wellbeing, meaning once again she was seen in terms of how Fitz would be affected by what happened to her. She also expected Fitz to be waiting for his Jemma to come back, the one he fell in love with, and

she was too angry to see things any different, just thinking about wanting to leave a soon as possible and training. But she stayed and fought to get Will back to Earth. Sadly Will had died saving her, as she found out after being tortured by Hydra and watching Fitz almost give his life for her again. And that was all too much, she needed to leave.

Now. And due to her intention of fighting Hydra, she still had her own little reunion with Will/Hive later on.

As soon as Daisy becomes Quake, after leaving SHIELD, Jemma is of course available to have her back if Daisy hasn't been antagonist with her by then. And even if she has, Jemma is likely to try to help her because she understands Daisy's reasons, even if she herself can lose her temper at times and feel frustrated by her former team. She also tried to find them after finding out the base had 'exploded' by the end of season 4, and managed to track down agent Piper eventually, who told her they had been trapped in a virtual reality program, came back, destroyed the bad guy behind it and disappeared again. Jemma knows they can take care of themselves so that was enough to make her walk away.

How and when they meet can change depending on how we plot threads.

Generally speaking, as much as she’s now a vigilante, and she hides behind a mask of 'bad guy trying to do the right thing’, she’s still Jemma Simmons, she still wants to save people, even if it means doing some morally questionable things to do so. May and Skye in particular are family, Fitz is a bittersweet old friend/former friend, and the team can be someone she’s very bitter about. A lot depends on the take rpers have on them. She’ll keep tabs on them and show up even if not thrilled about it to help. Characters from other fandoms can find her vigilanting, training to be even more lethal, using all sort of techs we know to be part of her world to help herself, and being extremely broken and tired of being who she is, but with no idea of where to start changing things, because every time she tries to do good, people suffer or die.

A longer version of her bio, only needed if you want more details about what happened in season 2 of aos and how Jemma took it in this AU, otherwise go ahead and skip it.

season 1

And when she’s out of her element after starting a life of adventure, traveling around the world, and sees people die, is asked to be the medical doctor she doesn’t have the right personality to be, is asked to do things above her abilities or people’s deaths will be on her, watches her new best friend Skye nearly die despite her best attempts to patch her up, is infected by an alien virus and jumps off a plane to die and not take the team down with her and is rescued at the last second, is betrayed by a dear friend who drops her and Fitz in the ocean, where Fitz, her best friend, her other half, confesses is love and then gives her the one last bit oxygen left, almost dying and brought to surface by a Jemma who then learns he suffered of major brain damage over it, she puts everything in the box and keeps trying to help. She’s angry at Ward, homicidally so, and that’s okay because he betrayed them, everyone is.

But everything else is locked up.

season 2

Fitz is in pieces, he’s pushing himself too hard to prove Jemma he’s still good at what he does, but at first he can’t even speak, and Jemma learns very fast that she can’t help him, that everything she does to try to make things better, is making him feel worse. And her heart can’t take this. She’s traumatized, she’s alone in taking care of him because everyone in the team has their duties and they have to rebuild SHIELD, Fitz is frustrated and isn’t healing as fast as he should, possibly because she’s there doing too much for him while simultaneously not bringing him any comfort.

So Jemma leaves, goes undercover in Hydra, something she’s not trained for. Does horrible things, knows she’s helping them hurt people, but is also saving so many by stealing information. And she’s hopefully helping Fitz, whom she’s told is okay.

And then she comes back at the base. She finds out Fitz told people he confessed her love and she bailed for that reason, and maybe that’s not the only version, other seems to have thought, including Fitz himself, that it’s his brain damage that drove her away, the fact that he’s 'useless’ as he puts it. Skye catches her crying and reminds her it’s okay to be angry. May still believes in her. But things with Fitz are fully broken, he felt abandoned and apparently most of the team did too.

And then Skye is mostly gone, facing her own tragedies, Coulson is busy, just like May. Bobbi is new and friendly, but Jemma has problems trusting people. Mack is on Fitz’s side, and Hunter might be too, in a way that paints her as the new, unwanted element. Jemma is a bit jealous and a bit hurt, but also understands it’s all her fault, she hurt Fitz and she has no way to fix this.

Fitz tells her he’s leaving to work with Mack, and then Trip dies. Jemma is alone in Porto Rico while the team is back at the base, dealing with the guilt of not protecting Trip from an alien threat, and watches Raina slaughter her team of scientists and escape, changed by the same alien object that has killed Trip and might have infected Skye. She comes home to check on her, speaks of potential dangers of a virus, of how she should have eradicated alien threats. Doesn’t know Skye was changed too - it would be different with her, of course, she’s a friend, she'sd just want to keep her healthy and safe. But Skye is scared, and Fitz thinks Jemma has changed too much and can’t be trusted, so they agree not to tell her.

When Jemma finds out, when she finds out that the person who knows her so well, and who wanted to believe in Ward until the very end, believed her capable of hurting Skye, her music box cracks. Things truly can’t be fixed between them either, it’s over.

She has so many justifications and reasons for what she’s done and said, but it’s useless as well as impossible to let them out, and the resentment is growing day by day. Jemma wants Skye to know she’s safe with her, but after Skye is gone, to learn how to deal with the changes in her body, soon enough it turns out Bobbi and Mack weren’t really loyal to Coulson and it’s a whole new mess.

Jemma doesn’t start any reconciliation with Fitz, she’s cold and avoids him as much as possible. She still comes up with the plan to protect the toolbox and send it away with Fitz, and after that she’s more actively aggressive against the other SHIELD. May told her she was trying to protect her, and Jemma clings to that, just like she clings to the few friendly interactions she’s still has had with Skye, because everything else just reminds her that she’s different and everyone else can see it too. In the end they are all reunited - Skye is apparently an inhuman, her life is not at risk, and Jemma is relieved and has no more questions about her powers, at least none that are scared for her life - and Jemma tries to kill Ward with a splinter bomb. Fails because Bakshi stopped her and died for it, and tries to push Ward to kill her too. Why not, she failed again and she hates him too much to be scared. Probably sensing her change of mood when she’s back, Fitz, despite their tense relationship, attempts to comfort her reminding her that not being able to push herself to kill Ward is good, he couldn’t do it either, they are not like him. And that, while she recognizes it as the reassurance it is, just reminds Jemma that she’s worlds away from Fitz and people like him. Because she does have it in her to kill. Because she didn’t lose any sleep over murdering Bakshi, her first kill. Because she’s capable of anything to protect her friends, people she wants to keep safe, and out of revenge as well. She tells Fitz she did try to kill Ward, she’s kicking herself she failed. She’s not hiding that part of her, she feels it’s time to accept it, to use it. She gave up on trying to become a better person, it only brings more pain, and she’s now letting all the resentment and the clashing feelings of frustration over unfair treatment and acceptance of her role of bad person come out. She wants to leave, go help people away from the team, go hurt other bad guys like Hydra without having people who look at her like she might kill them next, but her curiosity over the monolith takes over and she’s taken to another planet right before she quits.

While she’s not planning to date Fitz, she’s not exactly the nicest most positive person when on Maveth, and her relationship with Will still doesn’t start until the last month, from her side more of a physical comfort than love; she still cares for him, doesn’t want someone else to die for her. Sadly, once home, while she almost reconnects with Fitz, she has the chance to notice more hurtful things, such as how there were still leads and yet the rest of the team gave up on finding her alive, or how the team is more focused on Fitz’s feelings and reactions over Will and what happened to her than they are about her. She still feels like an outsider, spends her time either trying to open the portal or training even if it’s too soon. She’s then captured by Hydra, tortured, Fitz once again sacrifices himself for her and goes to Maveth; she frees Lash to help herself, finds out he killed innocent inhumans later, then that Will has died to save her, and is officially done with SHIELD. Too many negative feelings and she can tell she’s going to direct them to the team if she doesn’t get out of there.

As much as she’s now a vigilante, and she hides behind a mask of 'bad guy trying to do the right thing’, she’s still Jemma Simmons, she still wants to save people, even if it means doing some morally questionable things to do so. May and Skye in particular are family, Fitz is a bittersweet old friend/former friend, and the team can be someone she’s very bitter about. A lot depends on the take rpers have on them. She’ll keep tabs on them and show up even if not thrilled about it to help. Characters from other fandoms can find her vigilanting, training to be even more lethal, using all sort of techs we know to be part of her world to help herself, and being extremely broken and tired of being who she is, but with no idea of where to start changing things, because every time she tries to do good, people suffer or die.

#about page for mobile #about page

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theartofbeinganerd · 7 years

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Hi. I love your writing and its so nice of you to take time to fill all of these prompts. Please "AU where everything is the same but jemma gets infected with the alien virus in season 2, 3 or 4, that's up to you"

Hi! Aww thanks, I’m actually really enjoying it! :) Also, thank you for the prompt!!

I chose do to Season 2 (though I could pretty easily be persuaded to try out 3 or 4…), and since “everything is the same”, I wrote under the assumption that something else in Season 1 triggered Fitz’s realization of feelings, and everything happened in much the same way, just without 1x06.

*Takes place sometime around 2x12/2x13

(Ao3)

Jemma Simmons was completely and utterly tired of aliens andthe messes they left behind.

When Coulson had gathered up her, Skye, Fitz, and May on atrip to investigate a floating body, Jemma had known nothing good couldpossibly come from it. Whatever had caused it was obviously alien, and Coulsonhad been worried that it might have something to do with the Obelisk (evenafter it’d been destroyed in the temple) or possibly even HYDRA – neither ofwhich spelled out anything good for them.

Unfortunately, it had taken two more victims for them torealize that the cause was a virus left in a Chitauri helmet, and Jemma couldn’thelp but feel responsible for more deaths; if they’d only just figured it outsooner…

However, they had the helmet in their possession, and hadloaded it onto the Bus to take with them to another SHIELD base Coulson hadgotten back up and running, that would further study and take care of it. Alongthe way, Jemma had begun the study, though, and she was so sick of anything todo with aliens that she couldn’t even find it in her to be amazed at how thevirus spread from person to person through electrostatic shock, something neverbefore seen on Earth.

And, it was just par for the course that Jemma herself wouldend up with the virus; really, she wasn’t even surprised any more by theterrible luck they all seemed to have when it came to things like this.

According to her calculations, she figured that she musthave contracted the virus thirty-six hours ago, which left her with only twohours now to figure out a solution – or remove herself from the situation,which she would if it came down to it. But, so far, nothing she’d tried seemedto work, because how could it when she didn’t understand anything about this virus?

Through the glass doors of what used to be the lab on theBus (it was considered the garage now, even though she’d been using it as herlab during this mission), she could see Fitz working on the delivery mechanismshe’d need for her antiserum. His hands were shaking terribly, seeming to makethe job much harder than it should’ve been.

She almost wanted to say…something,try and find the words to calm him down even just a bit, but she held hertongue; they still weren’t quite on even terms after the way he’d kept Skye’spowers hidden from her, not to mention his hurt over her own lies and disappearanceto HYDRA.

Finally, he finished, sparing her a brief glance as hecarefully placed the mechanism in the drawer, allowing her to retrieve it onthe other side of the glass. She offered him a grateful smile, at least, but hemissed it with his gaze locked firmly on the ground.

With a quiet sigh, Jemma loaded the antiserum into Fitz’sdelivery mechanism, mentally crossing her fingers that the antibodies would doas they were supposed to and target the virus’s antigens – that was, if thevirus even had antigens. Knowing herluck? It wouldn’t.

She could feel all eyes on her as she picked up the secondlab rat, swiftly delivering the antiserum and waiting a moment, but the ratthen released a pulse and began to float in its glass container. Releasing ashaky breath, she glanced up to find Skye’s wide, worried eyes, even as shefollowed May and Coulson up the stairs to the second level of the Bus.

Fitz, however, lingered, wringing his hands and shifting anxiously,and she heard him inhale deeply before he murmured, “It’s…it’s gonna be okay.”

But, then she noticed him darting a quick glance at thewatch on his wrist, and she rolled her eyes as she snapped, “I see you lookingat your watch, Fitz. You don’t need to lie to me to make me feel better; I’vealready had enough of it as it is.”

He visibly bristled at the implication, taking a couple ofsteps closer until he was right in front of the glass partition. “What d’youwant me to say, then?”

“Nothing! Just don’t say anything! It seems every time wetalk, things only get worse!” Jemma threw her hands up in exasperation,fighting back the tears she could feel burning along the rims of her eyes. They’dbeen so close to the surface lately with every horrible thing after another,and now this virus and her likely upcoming death, coupled with the reminderthat she couldn’t seem to find a way to salvage her relationship with her bestfriend – it was all too much.

“S’not just…I’m not the only one re…whose fault it is, y’know!”Fitz reminded her stubbornly, planting his hands on his hips and scowling downat the ground. “You’re…I don’t…what happened, Jemma?”

Jemma couldn’t help the watery, slightly unhinged laugh shelet out at that question, shaking her head as she replied, “Everything, Fitz. Everything awful thatcould possibly happen, happened, and…and that’s why – this,” she gestured harshly toward herself, “is why I’m afraid ofeverything alien, Fitz. It’s why we allshould be. We don’t understand them or their technology or their viruses andpeople get hurt because of that, people diebecause of that.”

Fitz’s head rose quickly, his eyes rounded and terrified ashe said hurriedly, “You’re not gonna die.”

Giving a weary sigh, Jemma closed her aching eyes briefly andmurmured, “Remember when you said we’d regret the decision to go into the fieldsomeday? Well Fitz, you were right because I very much do; going into the fieldwas one of the biggest mistakes we’ve ever made.”

“We?” he repeatedincredulously. “I was doing justfine, stuck in a lab and I wasn’t…I was okay, not all…damaged and useless.” Angrily, he shook out his badhand, which Jemma could see was practically vibrating, it was trembling sobadly.

Finally, the frustration she’d had building up inside of herfor months now spilled over, and shefairly cried at him, “Fitz! You’re not damaged now! Can’t you see that? What happened was just a…a setback, somethingto readjust to. And against all odds, you’ve done that and more, you’re doingso well; you can still do what youlove and maybe it’s not the same as it used to be but…but you’re alive and that’s the only thing that’sever mattered.” Finding Fitz gaping blankly at her, Jemma sniffled back thetears once more and said stiffly, “I just wanted to say that before…before Inever got the chance to, that’s all.”

Fitz inhaled a shaky breath, stepping a bit closer to the partitionas he murmured seriously, “Jemma…you have to fix this.”

“I don’t know how,Fitz,” she admitted tiredly. “The antibodies from the three firefighters aren’tstrong enough to fight this virus. It’s born from alien DNA.” She couldn’tquite help the bitter tone of her voice as she reminded him of that fact. “There’sno one to create an antiserum from because no one’s actually survived thisexcept…”

“The Chitauri,” they finished in the same moment, gazing ateach other through the glass with wide, watery eyes.

“The one wearing that helmet…must’ve had the virus,” Fitzstarted, the words slow and calculated as the revelation began to hit him.

“Yes, and managed to survive without ever emitting anelectrostatic pulse because…”

“It was immune.”

“Yes!” Jemma released a little, disbelieving laugh. “Theyjust the carrier, like Typhoid Mary.”

Fitz nodded rapidly in agreement, absently gesturing in thedirection of the stairs as he said, “So I can just…I’ll take some…um…cells fromthe helmet and…”

“We can create an antiserum, yes,” she finished, beaming inrelief as she watched Fitz scramble up the stairs to retrieve the helmet. Whileshe was waiting on him, Jemma couldn’t help but think of how this was the firsttime in so long that they were on thesame page, that they’d been able to finish each other sentences and be on thesame wavelength.

Oh, how she’d missedit, missed him.

Moments later, Fitz came rushing back down the stairs,carrying the container with the helmet in it. Before she could register what hewas doing, though, he’d unlocked the lab doors and burst inside. “No!” shecried, watching in despair as the doors closed once more behind him; she just couldn’t allow him to get sick as well,not because of her. “Fitz, you can’t be in here!”

“S’already done,” Fitz stated, shaking his head as he setthe container down on the lab table. Meeting her gaze over it, he told herfirmly, “We’re gonna fix this, Jemma. Together.”

Jemma just couldn’t say no to that, not after the months she’dspent agonizing over how much she missed Fitz, missed working side-by-side withhim, missed the thrill of completing another successful project together.Besides, as they worked seamlessly together to create an antiserum from theepithelial cells in the helmet, Jemma felt her life was nothing but safe withFitz’s hands involved in the process.

And, even if it didn’t work, at least she’d have the memoryof working together one last time to take with her.

When they were finished, Fitz asked to be the one to test itout on the final lab rat, and so Jemma stepped back to watch as he administeredthe antiserum, and she could see Skye, Coulson, and May watching just asintently from the other side of the glass. When nothing happened, Jemma felt asthough a hundred pounds had been lifted from her shoulders as she and Fitzshared a smile. “We did it,” she whispered in relief.

Then, she heard the crackle of electricity and saw theflickering blue light out of the corner of her eye. And just like that, herlast hope was dashed. She was going todie.

No longer able to hold back her tears, Jemma assured thatCoulson would get the news to her father rather than her mother, then asked ofthe three, “Would you mind if I had a brief moment alone with Fitz?”

As May and Coulson led a tear-soaked Skye upstairs, Jemmaturned back to Fitz, wiping away her own tears from her cheeks, resolve washingover her. He’d turned back to the lab bench, and his whole body was practicallytrembling as he rambled on, “Just gotta…another try that’s all. This time it…thepulse was um…much less and…”

With shaking hands, Jemma began to lift the fireextinguisher in her hands, wishing that this wasn’t the way it had to endbetween them (wishing it didn’t have to end at all). But, she found herselfhesitating; firstly because Fitz had already had a head injury and she’d feelpositively awful giving him another (even if this one would be nowhere near asbad as the first), and then, because she suddenly had a flash of memory fromthe pod, of Fitz saying that he couldn’t live if she didn’t.

She didn’t know if he still felt that way (but, she couldguess from his reaction just now that he might), and she couldn’t help but beafraid – what would happen to Fitz if she died?

But, if she stayed, there was no doubt that she would killhim and everyone else on the Bus with the pulse, and she could not allow thatto happen.

So, Jemma took a deep breath, forced back her tears, andallowed herself just one more moment to memorize Fitz; how he looked just then,his face and his voice and the hunch of his shoulders as he bent over the labtable, the way he smelled (he’d changed aftershaves while she’d been away atHYDRA, and she’d only just started to get used to the change). Then, she closedher eyes and brought the fire extinguisher down against the back of his head,trying to be as gentle as possible while still temporarily knocking himunconscious.

Just as she was stepping out onto the ramp of thecargo-hold, the wind whipping at her hair, Jemma just had to glance back one lasttime. Her heart leapt into her throat as she saw a distressed Fitz awake andattempting to pry open the doors, wild-eyed and terrified as he screamed at hernot to do it.

For just a moment, she felt a surge of regret that she’d nevergotten the chance to tell him that he was more than that too. But, she ultimatelydecided that knowing about her feelings wouldn’t have done him any good, and itlikely would’ve been too much for him in the end, so perhaps it was better thisway.

Offering Fitz one last, sad smile, Jemma stepped back offthe edge of the ramp and fell through the air, knowing that at least he wassafe.

Sometime later, a very much alive (and thankfully now dry)Jemma was just leaving Coulson’s office after being promptly scolded forpulling such a stunt when they absolutely couldn’t afford to lose anyone else.She was fortunate enough to have been followed by May, with a parachute and theactually very effective antiserum, but Jemma still couldn’t regret doing it.After all, if the antiserum hadn’tworked, she would’ve saved four lives, ones that would no doubt go on to savethe world from HYDRA and whatever other threats were waiting for them.

It’d been an easy enough trade to make, but not one that shetook lightly, of course.

Automatically, her feet began to take her in the directionof Fitz’s old bunk, but she forced them to stop as she wondered whether or nothe’d even want to see her. But, ultimately, she knew that they needed to talkregardless, so she continued the journey, gently knocking on the closed doorand sliding it open at his muttered invitation.

Inside, she found him hugging a pillow and absently rubbingat his bad hand. As she perched lightly on the edge of the bed beside him, hepointedly kept his eyes lowered. She waited a couple of beats, then he finally asked,“Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?” Jemma asked softly.

“About…um…” He lifted his bad hand, giving it a littleshake. “Me not being…damaged.”

“Of course,” she assured him, releasing a quiet sigh. “Fitz,I’ve always thought that; you just needed time.” Allowing her eyes to slipclosed, Jemma’s shoulders rose and fell on another, heavy sigh as she finallyadmitted, “The reason I left, why I went to HYDRA…it was because I made youworse, Fitz. I’d been hindering your progress, I could see it happening, so I left – for you, to help you.” Shaking her head at herself, she added, “Thatwas no excuse to lie to you, I know, but that was for you, too, so that you wouldn’tspend all your time worrying about me, and instead you could focus on healingand adjusting. And, well…you did lie to me too, if you’ll remember.”

There was a long stretch of silence, and Jemma allowed himthe time she’d already known he’d need to soak in her admission. Then, hescoffed, causing her eyes to reopen in surprise. “I’m always worrying aboutyou,” he muttered, giving a jerky little shrug. “Especially when you’re jumpingout of planes.” He was quiet a moment, then gave a sigh. “And I’m sorry for…forkeeping things from you, but…but you were acting like…I mean, the alien stuff,you were…”

Jemma cut him off there, asking quietly, “Do you understand whyI was being so cautious about it now?”

He grimaced, nodding firmly. “I do.” There was another beatof silence, though it was a bit less tense with the apologies and explanationsout in the open, which was giving Jemma hope that maybe they could fix things after all. “Y’know,” hestarted suddenly, “I was…I was gonna jump after you.”

Startled, Jemma turned quickly to face him. “Well I’m gladyou didn’t,” she stated, clasping her hands tightly together in her lap to keepthem from trembling, “you don’t need to be risking your life for me ever again,alright?”

Finally, Fitz turned to look at her, his eyebrows raised ashe said plainly, “I can’t…I’m not gonna promise you that.”

In utter disbelief, she demanded, “And why not? You knowwhat happened last time, you know the consequences and obviously it wasn’t worthit – you nearly died!”

“And if I hadn’t done it, you would have!” Fitz reminded her sharply.

Jemma felt that familiar frustration and hopelessness withthe situation bubbling up once more; he apparently hadn’t learned anything fromwhat had happened in the pod. “I don’t know why you have to be so stubborn,”she told him, rising from the bed and going to leave before things could getworse once more.

“You know why,” Fitz replied lowly, stopping her in hertracks. With her back still to him, he said softly, “I told you why, in the…the um…the pod, and I’m sorry but it’s true,okay? I tried to…to forget, to not feel…” He trailed off, giving a tense sigh,but then he went on, “Even if I’d…if it’d worked, I’d still rather die in yourplace.”

She briefly closed her eyes and shook her head, then went tosit back down next to him. “You shouldn’t, Fitz. It’s just…it’s not worth it.”

“It is,” he disagreed,his voice quiet but firm.

Jemma glanced up then, finding him closer than she’d expectedhim to be, and she had the sudden, desperate urge to close the scant spacebetween them and kiss him (and she had a pretty good feeling that he wouldn’t fighther on it). But, she managed to tamp down on the urge; there was still so much unresolvedhurt and damage done to their relationship, they still needed some time to healfrom it all.

So, instead, she offered him a small smile. “Thank you Fitz,for helping me in the lab, helping me to figure it all out. I couldn’t havedone it without you, and whether I like it or not, you continue to be a hero.”With that, she leaned in and indulged in pressing a kiss to his scruffy cheek,lingering only a couple of moments longer than was likely considered friendly.

Leaving a slightly dazed Fitz alone in the bunk, Jemma hopedthat what had happened today was the first step to mending their damagedrelationship, to restoring what they’d had before the distance and the lies andthe hurt.

And perhaps, someday soon, she wouldn’t have to decide against kissing him when the opportunity arose.

#shayna writes #fsfic #fitzsimmons #prompts #season 2 au #everything set in season 2 is so angsty omg #fzzt au #Anonymous

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agent-85 · 7 years

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And for now I'm dreaming of AU, one of the possible scenarios in Framework. Jemma is still on Maveth, but Fitz gave up. We don't know the exact date of her "death". Fitz is now with AIDA/Agnes, creator of Framework's narrative or .... with LMD/Jemma. Another, better Maveth' story, with Jemma not giving up. Regards, Mary

MARY!! Welcome back!!!

Honestly, this was my very first thought when I woke up this morning. And, mind you, usually my first thought in the morning us a big fat UGH, MORNING, so that just tells you how much this last ep destroyed me. But I legit woke up thinking Jemma is still on Maveth and FITZ moved on!!! Which, I don’t know why that would ever happen, unless AIDA/Radcliffe’s twisted view of Fitz’s “regrets” has to do with it. Maybe she knows that the worst thing can happen to Fitz is losing Jemma, so AIDA’s solution was to make sure Fitz never had Jemma to lose. Which, again, is twisted.

(And you have to remember that most of these “regrets” are not actual bad choices that the characters made. May did the right thing in Bahrain; the tragedy was that she had no other choice. It’s not Mack’s fault that Hope died; the tragedy was that he couldn’t prevent it. And it’s quite possible that Hydra took over in the Framework!verse because Coulson wasn’t there to die and motivate the Avengers! A lot of these “regrets” that AIDA is trying to correct are just the cruelty of life, and it seems that when she removes that cruelty, it manifests in other ways.)

My main theory is that whatever is happening to Fitz is tied very closely to Radcliffe. Everyone else is in the Framework is unaware that they’re in a fake reality, but Radcliffe went in, came out, and still thought it was a pretty good place. That means that, because or in spite of what AIDA is doing to everyone else, Radcliffe is in his own perfect bubble. That bubble has to include Fitz. Maybe Radcliffe is a tech mogul with Fitz’s dad as his business partner and Fitz as his protégé. Maybe Fitz’s dad isn’t involved at all, and Radcliffe has taken over that role. Either way, since Radcliffe doesn’t have a moral center and he isn’t as buddy buddy with Jemma, Jemma didn’t necessarily have to fit into that picture. With Radcliffe, it’s never been about what Fitz wants. It’s always been about manipulating Fitz into giving Radcliffe what Radcliffe wants. I suspect that this is just a continuation of that.

That said, Agnes’ role in this is interesting. AIDA is outside of the Framework; Agnes is in it. And you have to remember that Agnes is Radcliffe’s romantic interest, so it would be super weird and creepy if she was with Fitz in any romantic way. It COULD be Agnes in the limo, and they could just be on their way to some shindig for Radcliffe. He IS listed as being in the next episode on IMDB, so I’m sure it has something to do with him. Is Agnes Fitz’s pseudo step-mother? Are they both Radcliffe’s students, Agnes acting as a platonic stand in for Jemma? I don’t know. And it is still possible that the woman in the limo is Fitz’s sister (who exists because Fitz’s dad stuck around or whatever), Fitz’s mother, or someone else. It could even be Jemma! How stinking cool would it be if Jemma stepped out of that limo dressed like she’s going to the Oscars?

There are so many options here. If Agnes is in the limo, Jemma COULD be on Maveth, and if so, she could have to come back from the planet all on her own!! But I only think that would happen if Radcliffe/AIDA decided to erase all the traitors in Fitz’s life (his father, Ward, Radcliffe, and possibly Jemma in Radcliffe’s perception). That would explain Ward, for one. And that allows Jemma to have a grave that she’s not in. I don’t think that’s the most likely scenario, though. And I don’t think that’s the one I most want to see.

What I really want to see, to be completely honest, is Jemma winning Fitz back. Maybe they’ve never met, and Jemma has to convince him that they matter to each other. Maybe it’s something similar. Why do I want that, you ask? Because Fitz did it! Fitz won Jemma all over again after Maveth, and I’d like to see that be part of her role reversal. I’d like to see Fitz have other options and turn them down for her. I’ve said before that the HUGE problem with 3A was that it made their love look unequal, even though their equality is what makes them truly special. 4B went a long way to reestablish that equality, but I’d really like to see them see it through. And, hopefully, they’ll do it better than 3A, and Fitz won’t be put on a pedestal and have all his agency taken away. Cross your fingers.

Anyway, that was mostly a bit of rambling, but the long story short is that yes, I am still bitter about 3A, yes, I still feel that there is a need to restore the damage done to Jemma’s character and the FitzSimmons relationship as a whole, and it’s really hard to tell how this is all going to pan out. I’m pretty excited to see how this is going to play out, but I’ve also been burned before, so I’m reminding myself to be cautious.

#FStag #FitzSimmons #Mary #Meta of Agent 85 #Anons of Agent 85 #Answers of Agent 85 #AoS spoilers

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