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jessiewritesthings · 4 years

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Saudade - Epilogue

Prince Zuko x Reader

Here she is!! Saudade is my baby and i’m so happy and so grateful for everyone that has taken the time to read this, i love you all! thank you thank you thank you x

Part I - Part II - Part III

168 AG

Izumi smiled softly, flipping through the pages of the family album. Black and white photos dotted the pages, documenting the life you had shared with Zuko for more than seventy years. Images of you and Zuko at the helm of numerous Fire Lily Festivals, visiting Fire Nation Citizens, meeting with delegates from all over the Four Nations. The images Izumi liked the most were the ones with all your friends in them – as a child she had thought it was just the coolest thing that her parents were best friends with the Avatar.

She also particularly loved the photos you would take on your vacations to Ember Island – loved how proudly you held yourself, scar and all. Most people would take to hiding away, a scar so bad as yours was enough reason to, Izumi had figured. She knew her father struggled with it every day – no matter how many times you tried to comfort him, he always saw it as a sign of his weakness, a reminder of the cruelty that Azula and Ozai, and the rest of his predecessors had put the world through.

Your life with Zuko hadn’t always been easy, though it had definitely been worth it. Numerous assassination attempts on the both of you had plagued your first few years together, and the backlash from Zuko’s advisors as he proposed and promptly married you, crowning you his Fire Lady, hadn’t gone down particularly easy. Nonetheless, you were stronger together, and in time the Fire Nation grew to love you, just as they did Zuko.

Izumi sighed, a tear rolling down her cheek as she closed the album, placing it on the corner table before joining her father on the balcony.

“Izumi, my dear,” Zuko murmured, reaching for her hand as she placed it on his shoulder.

Izumi stood silently with her father, watching as their guest’s ships began to depart. If she squinted, she could see Katara with Tenzin and Pema, waving as Pema wrangled with Jinora and Ikki, young Meelo clinging to his father. Raising his hand to wave in return, Zuko thought about how desperately he wanted Aang, or his Uncle Iroh around – someone that could help him come to terms with the most devastating blow he’d been dealt yet.

It had been two weeks now, since Zuko had woken to find you cold, yet soft and peaceful in his arms. Your arms had still been pressed across his chest, the same groove you always found yourselves sleeping in, legs pushed together like you were two halves of a whole – which, in a way, you were. Zuko had swallowed down his fear, and his cry for help, as he looked at you, softly brushing your white hair from your face, his fingers delicately running the beads along the strands.

“Oh, my sweet y/n,” he had whispered, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, his tears starting to fall over your face. He stayed there with you, unable and unwilling to move, as if he stayed still forever you might open your eyes and greet him. His eyes didn’t move from your form when his attendant, Mira, entered the room, a tray of hot breakfast and steaming tea in her arms.

The tray was quickly placed on the side table as Mira rushed to the bedside, gasping in shock.

“Lord Zuko,” she started, tears rolling down her cheeks.

“Mira, please.” He let go of you now, gently removing himself from your bed, as if trying not to rouse you.

Mira came to his side, placing an arm on Lord Zuko’s shoulder before he smiled softly at her and pulled her into a hug. Zuko continued to cry, comforted by Mira. You had been loved and admired by all of the palace staff, and many of them had requested to follow you and Zuko when you had moved to Ember Island following Zuko’s abdication as Fire Lord.

“The Lady y/n will be remembered fiercely, Lord Zuko. The Fire Nation’s most delicate flower.”

Zuko smiled, fondly remembering the first time he had introduced you to his dragon, Druk. Zuko had the utmost confidence in the dragon, and you had been positively terrified – not because he was a giant fire-breathing dragon – you’d proven yourself more than capable of handling fire by now – but he was just so big. Nonetheless, you had mounted Druk, and shrieked in surprise as Zuko leapt off the dragon, watching as you soared into the sky, your wild hair flowing as you clutched onto Druk’s scales. Zuko was positively enamoured – he’d already spent a lifetime loving you, but seeing you ride Druk with such tenacity and grit had sent him straight into the past, flying through all your history until you were both back in the Crystal Catacombs in Ba Sing Se. Zuko was enchanted by you, and he knew he would be until his heart stopped beating.

You were beaming as Druk had landed, your hair windswept and your blue robes loose, exhilarated. Leaping off the dragon, you ran to Zuko’s arms, flinging yourself to him as your arms found their natural home, your lips pressing to his scar.

“Zuko, that was incredible,” you’d exclaimed, astounded.

“Mmm, it certainly was.” Zuko smiled – watching you ride Druk was better than being in the reigns himself.

“My Dragon Queen,” he murmured, pressing soft kisses against your neck, the spot he knew you loved the most.

_____

Zuko sat with his daughter until the sun had entirely disappeared, and then they sat together for longer, watching the night as the stars began to dapple across the sky, the moon incandescent in its beauty as it graced the sky. They sat silently, hands clasped together, tucked into a patchwork quilt you had made for Izumi’s birth – a delicate, stunning piece of work that seamlessly incorporated both sides of you and Zuko, magical swirls of red and blue speckled with gems and beads.

Izumi twirled the blue beads adorning the quilt through her fingers, recalling the countless nights that she would rouse you both from sleep, claiming to be plagued by nightmares. You never complained, always opening your arms to pull her in, letting her nestle in-between you and Zuko where she would sleep freely. Sometimes, before sleep took her, Izumi would feel your fingers drifting through her hair, and she would fall asleep in such a tranquil, safe space.

Eventually Izumi heard stories about her grandfather Ozai – horrifying stories of what he’d done to the world, his nation, his family. She’d never asked her father about his scar – in-fact it never occurred to her as a child that it deviated from malicious intent, because her mother had one too. In Izumi’s young mind, she used to imagine that the two of you being scarred was just the spirits way of making sure you found each other, as if your scars acted as magnets that would bring you together wherever you were.

“I was so lucky to have her love me, Izumi,” Zuko hummed, voice raspy. “I always knew I would love her, after we first met. Your mother, she was magic. Ethereal. It has been the greatest honour of my life to love her, and that love brought me the greatest gift: you.”

Izumi smiled fondly at her father, leaning forward to press a kiss to his forehead.

“She was lucky to have your love, too.”

Lord Zuko turned to his daughter, a soft smile gracing his face. She was an excellent Fire Lord, and he recalled the time Ursa had told him that a Fire Lord producing a nonbending child was a disgrace in Ozai’s eyes. Of course, Ozai was wrong. Izumi was not a bender, but Zuko constantly found himself in awe of his daughter’s calm demeanour, and when he abdicated his throne, he had never been prouder of Izumi as she was crowned Fire Lord.

Izumi’s birth had not been easy for you – she was a stubborn babe, and you’d been in labour for hours – days actually, as you later found out. Katara was assisting you, and Aang had taken Zuko away to keep him distracted – it was awfully improper for a husband to be present at a birth of course. Naturally, that didn’t deter you, and you constantly pleaded with Katara and your handmaiden to please, please, please get Zuko. As Zuko and Aang returned to the palace, Fire Lord Zuko was informed that your child still had not been delivered. Anxiety consumed him, and to the horror of his advisors he’d dashed to your chambers, grasping your hand and whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you finally delivered a healthy, beautiful, precious baby girl.

Zuko was enamoured with Izumi immediately, and would often be found after a particularly highly-strung meeting with his advisors sitting on the balcony in Izumi’s nursery, holding his soft, sweet girl in his arms. Before Izumi was born, Zuko had confided in you that he wasn’t sure about his ability to be a father – he wanted to be a good father so much that it overwhelmed him, and he wasn’t able to comprehend it. He’d blurted it out in the middle of a game of Pai Sho, neither of you knowing that you were in-fact already carrying the Crown Princess of the Fire Nation. You’d reached your arm across the board, hand gently caressing Zuko as you gave him a reassuring smile.

“You will be magnificent, my love. Any children we have will grow to see their father the same way I do – brave, intelligent, loving and kind.”

Zuko took your hands, pressing them to his lips as he watched you, shadows from the flames flickering across your face.

“Have I told you that I’m madly in love with you?” he replied, a cheeky grin forming. Forgetting the game of Pai Sho, you crept over to his side, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Not nearly enough,” you answered, your lips pressing together as Zuko put his hands in your hair, pulling his fingers through.

“I’m madly in love with you, y/n. Every minute of every day.”

175 AG

Lord Zuko stirred softly in his sleep, out on the balcony as usual – you had spent most of your time here curled up together, after all. He was smiling softly, thinking of you as he always did. It had been an interesting few years without you, but nothing could fill the void that was left inside Zuko after you left. He would often wake from a restless sleep, desperately clutching the sheets as if you were there, only to be disappointed every time. He played many games of Pai Sho with Mira, and she would sit with him each evening, enjoying a cup of tea on the balcony as they kept each other company. Most often, Zuko would sit on the loveseat in the balcony, your favourite blanket draped across him for comfort instead of warmth. He’d sit there with his tea, usually forgetting it as he would drift into a deep sleep, visited by you and your memories together.

“Come, Zuko. Let’s go down to the beach,” you urged.

The sun was setting on Ember Island, and you were due to return to the palace tomorrow, Fire Lord duties to be resumed. Iroh had graciously stepped in in place of Zuko to allow the pair of you to have on ‘official’ honeymoon, something you were both incredibly grateful for.

Slipping your hand into his, you’d made your way down to the beach, both barefoot and revelling in the soothing nature of the sand. You’d let go of him now, running through the waves as they crashed on the shore. Zuko couldn’t do much more than stare at you – your hair shined in the fading sun, the red hues making you look delicious and warm. Your gown wrapped around your waist, unravelled slowly, revealing your scar. Zuko grimaced, a flash of pain echoing on his face. Seeing this, you ran to his side, placing your hands in his.

“I just…,” he started, swallowing. “I just wish I could take it away, for you.”

“Don’t, my love. It is as much a part of me as yours is you. I am proud to have this scar. Proud of what it represents for us, for all that we’ve been through. I don’t want you to feel this way every time you look at me.”

Zuko smiled softly, pressing his lips to your forehead.

“I look at you, and I am alive.”

Zuko placed his hands on your waist as you wrapped yours around his neck.

“Dance with me,” you whispered. Zuko blushed – forever the one with two left feet – and the two of you danced, softly, delicately, holding each other as if all the love in the world had been given to only you both in that moment. Water rushed over your feet as you moved across the sand. A laugh escaped you as Zuko caught his foot on yours, accidentally tripping you up as you both fell into the sand, water lapping at your feet. Sighing, you ran your fingers through his hair as you rested on top of him.

“I think I loved you the moment I saw you. Even if I didn’t know it then,” you’d whispered, gazing into his eyes. Zuko had raised his head slightly, watching you carefully, almost as if he didn’t believe you. “We will be remembered, Zuko. For the right reasons.”

Pulling himself off the sand, Zuko lent back, allowing you to shuffle into his arms. You sat silently together, watching as the stars began to dot across the night sky, peaceful and content like neither of you had ever felt before.

Zuko woke slowly, the first rays of the new day dawning. You stood before him, hazy and radiant and celestial in your beauty, before reaching one hand out to him.

“Come, Zuko. There’s still so much more to see.”

Zuko’s eyes closed, a long, deep breath escaping for one final time. He was in his dreams now – dreaming his dreams with you.

_____

“Lord Zuko,” Mira called, unsurprised to find the elderly Lord had once again slept on his balcony.

Mira approached him, a gasp of shock leaving her as she realised just how peaceful he looked. In his hands he held a small, silver hair clip, adorned with white and blue gems and beads.

Ah. Together again.

_____

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