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moon-in-daylight · 4 years

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Odi et amo / Dhawan!Master x reader

Summary: You already knew The Master wasn’t the easiest person to put up with when you started travelling with him, but sometimes his temper makes you wonder why you even try

Words: 2383

Note: I was going through my old Latin notes and when I found this poem I felt the need of writing this idea. My history geek side was strong while writing this, so I apologize for that. 😬

Traveling with The Master could be a little too much sometimes.

Not that you didn’t enjoy it, or that you weren’t grateful for the chance you were given to explore both time and space. You would always be grateful for everything he had done for you. For showing you the stars, and for taking you to places not even books could properly describe.

It was the most amazing experience you could have ever imagined, but sometimes his reckless behavior made things incredibly hard for you.

That time he had taken you to one of the time periods that had always aroused your curiosity, the final decades of the Roman Republic. He didn’t usually consulted you on when or where to go, he would simply set the controls on some random alien planet and let hell break lose wherever he went, but maybe hearing you talk about history with such passion as you did, had gotten him to take you there. Not that he would admit he had took you there on purpose. According to what he said when his TARDIS landed in the middle of the Forum, his ship had just casually landed there, in a completely random way.

You didn’t care what he said, though. You were simply ecstatic to be in the middle of the golden century of the Roman culture, it didn’t matter if it had been due a typo with the coordinates or whatever other excuse he tried to come up with. Only thinking about all the legendary pieces of art that were being written in the century you were visiting amazed you: Virgil’s Aeneid, Ovid’s Metamorphoses, and, of course, all of Cicero’s speeches.

For all of your student life you had heard about the myths, the battles, and everything related with the years prior the Roman Empire. But you could have never imagined you would be able to see how astonishing Rome had been in its golden century with your very own eyes.

It was simply unbelievable to think about all those historians trying to study every word written about Rome in libraries and museums when you got the chance to actually stand there. To witness the last years of one of the most important periods in western history. A period that was soon to be over, maybe even sooner than you had expected.

It had only been a few hours since the TARDIS had landed, but, as usual, it hadn’t taken long for The Master to start messing around with important historical events.

You should have probably expected it, it was always like that with The Master. He was reckless, chaotic, and he didn’t care who he killed or what he destroyed. You shouldn’t have been surprised when he used his tissue compression eliminator on one the most important historical figures of all time.

You barely had time to realize what had happened before the entirety of the Roman army started to chase you.

“You, me. TARDIS. Now!” You rushed The Master angrily. He rolled his eyes as he teleported you both back to his ship, making you disappear in front of a bunch of confused Roman soldiers. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?!” You asked in frustration at him. He ignored you, walking towards the console.

“He was going to die soon anyway.” The Master uninterested voice said, not paying attention to you.

“Julius Caesar wasn’t supposed to die until 44 B.C!” You reprimanded him.

The Master kept ignoring you as he moved things around the console, causing you to get angrier. Why did he had to be like that? Was it so much to ask that he didn’t kill anyone for just once? All you wanted was to spend a few hours there, maybe meet some of the authors you had read about all your life and even get the chance to talk to them. But thanks to his volatile temper all you had achieved was to become a public enemy to the Roman Republic.

“You just erased the last 10 years of his life and it may have changed the whole course of history!” Thinking about the impact of his actions, you added.

“So?” He turned to you, as if nothing happened. “He was a moron.”

“That’s not the point!” You cut him off, frustrated by how little he cared. “You can’t go around killing whoever you want!”

The Master looked at you in a threatening way, his deadly cold stare making you look away for a moment. It wasn’t the first time the two of you got into an argument like this one and you knew that he wasn’t amused by your impertinence. You had seen him destroy planets and civilizations in the blink of an eye, tear apart galaxies in a matter of hours. You knew upsetting him wasn’t the smart thing to do, but sometimes he could be so infuriating that you just couldn’t help yourself from rebelling to him.

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breathe in an attempt to calm down his temper he walked towards you. You looked at him in awe, swallowing the lump in your throat as you did your best to hold his gaze.

“I think you’re forgetting who you’re travelling with.” He harshly said, his eyes piercing right throw you. “You’re my pet, you don’t get to tell me what to do. If you don’t like it, leave.”

You held his stare for a few more seconds before finally giving up and leaving the TARDIS. It was completely impossible to reason with him, and you weren’t sure why you even tried anymore. It always had to be his chaotic, destructive way. You loved him, but he truly was infuriating.

Sometimes you just wished he could be a bit more relaxed, more empathic. But that wasn’t the way he was. He would never be.

You walked through Rome’s crowded streets without looking back, focused only on the anger that you were feeling. In times like these, you seriously considered the possibility of just leaving his TARDIS and going back home. You didn’t want to, but his temper was too much to bear at times. There was no need or use on killing randomly whenever he felt like it, so why couldn’t he control himself? At times like this you couldn’t help but second guess why you put up with him, why you stayed by his side in despite of all the evil things he did.

You still needed him though. He had shown you the most amazing things, taken you to places in the universe you could have never imagined could exist. And you also needed him if you wanted to go back home. Retracing your steps, you found that his TARDIS was now gone. Honestly, you weren’t surprised.

Now you were stuck in the 1st century BC. Not exactly the adventure you were looking forward to.

Resigned, you walked away from the place where the time machine had been just a few moments ago and wandered again through the metropolis. You didn’t know how long you were going to be there, or if you would ever be able to go back home again. You thought you might as well get to know the place a bit, always being careful not to bump into one of the soldiers that had seen you with The Master before, of course. The last thing you needed right now was some soldier recognizing you as one of Caesar’s murderers.

Trying to be discrete, you decided to get inside the first library you found in hopes you could hide yourself there.

You were so upset that you barely could enjoy all the knowledge that surrounded you. Normally, you would have rushed through all the shelves, picking up as many books as you could and reading as much as you could from them, The Master following you close behind as he watched you with an amused expression. But The Master wasn’t there, and you didn’t feel like doing anything other than sitting in a corner and watch the hours go by.

Just a few moments ago, you would have punched the Time Lord in the face if you had seen him, and now all you could do was think of how much you would like him to be there with you. Not only because you were trapped there without him, but because things got too quiet when he was not around. You didn’t usually admitted, but his chaotic self wasn’t always that bad. Sometimes it was fun to just watch him as he got the both of you into the most absolutely twisted situations. Now that he wasn’t there, you only wished he came back.

Getting yourself lost in those thoughts, you eyed a papyrus placed in front of you. And letting curiosity take over you, you started to read it. Soon, you recognized some of the verses written in front of you. You had read those before. They were poems written by Catullus, addressed to his lover Lesbia. They had been written only a few years before the day you had landed in.

Doing your best to understand the poems, to translate them, you looked for a specific one. It had been some time since you had last studied Latin, but you still remembered the basics. Enough to understand most of the words.

Carefully looking through the verses, you found the one you were looking for:

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.

Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

It took you a bit of effort to remember those old verses, but there was a reason why those words had popped inside your head. You roughly translated the verses:

I hate and I love. You may wonder why I do so.

I don’t know, but I feel it that way and I am tormented.

You looked at the words written in front of you, immediately thinking of The Master.

It was almost as if those verses were talking about the two of you. You hated him at times. You hated his stubbornness, his annoying arrogance. But you had been with him long enough to know that there was so much more to him than that.

He was also one of the most important people in your life. Despite his bad temper, besides his irrational anger. You couldn’t imagine what your life would be without him. Without travelling the stars with him, without being around him as his companion. You loved him and you knew that the feeling was mutual, even though he would never admit it out loud.

It was probably irrational, but that’s how you felt. And you knew deep down that you wouldn’t change it for the world. You wanted him, even though you didn’t always agree with him and even though you got mad at him sometimes.

You probably were out of your mind to feel that way for The Master. But then again, maybe he wasn’t the only psychopath travelling inside that TARDIS.

Well, he was now, you supposed, since you were stuck in Ancient Rome.

You felt a tear running down your cheek when you thought about the possibility of never seeing him again. You couldn’t blame anyone but yourself, tough, you had been the one to voluntarily leave his TARDIS.

Looking up when you saw a silhouette, you quickly recognized him by the color of his coat. The Master couldn’t be any more surprised when you quickly got up and hugged him. He had to admit that that gesture of yours caught him a bit out of guard.

“I thought you had left forever.” You told him, your head buried in the crook of his neck. He slowly put his arms around you, not knowing well how to react. Showing affection wasn’t something he dealt well with, it was easier to just argue with you.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” He admitted, letting his pride aside for barely a second.

He wasn’t going to admit it, but when he hadn’t found you in the first minutes after coming back for you, he had started to get worried sick that something had happened to you. He wouldn’t have forgiven himself if that had been the case, but he wasn’t planning on telling you any of it.

The both of you were too proud to form a proper apology, but this was the closest you would get to it. It was enough for you, and you hoped it would be for him too.

“Don’t ever run off like that again.” The Master said, letting go of you as he put back that front of his again. It was surprising to see how even him had that soft spot too.

Silently, he guided you back to the TARDIS. For the whole way back, you were still consumed by your thoughts, your mind remembering that poem every time you looked in his direction. You felt something strong for him, and you knew he felt it back. If it had been any other person, he would have never came back.

Once in the TARDIS, he walked back to the console, carefully looking at you from the corner of his eye so you wouldn’t notice. Since you hadn’t said a word in several minutes, he supposed you were still mad at him.

“I know this isn’t how you had pictured this adventure, but I-“ He started, but you quickly cut him off. You knew how hard it was for him to say those words.

“It’s okay.” You said, placing yourself beside him in the console. “Maybe I overreacted too. You were right about Caesar being a moron after all.” You laughed.

The Master turned to you with an amused gesture on his face. It wasn’t every day that either of you apologized to the other.

“You can keep him, if that's any consolation.” He searched for the miniaturized version of the Roman general in his pocket, offering it to you.

“I can’t believe you kept him.” You took him into your hands, analyzing it closely. You couldn’t help the smile from forming in your face. “You’re the absolute worst, I hate you!”

“No, you do not.” The Master smirked at you as he pulled a lever of his ship, taking you to your next adventure.

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unproduciblesmackdown · 3 years

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comet, moon, pluto, aquila, protostar

Thank You vm

Comet- What are you currently frustrated about?

lmaooo oh you know at any given time i’m weaving this rich tapestry of continual frustrations lol.....i’d say i’m in an Upswing Period of [simmering frustration levels closer to the surface] lately too lol like earlier in the week i pushed through a day or two there more casually but then it was like ah jeez here comes the malaise. more specifically today, even just before sitting down to answer this, i emerged from the bathroom to find there was a “dog has pooped inside despite having been outside within the last 10 min” shituation, which was wonderful.....annoyed from Waking by “smh at not being able to adjust my nocturnality, still frustrated about the near success of last friday being thwarted by the dead of night hammering debacle,” & regular Antagonizing Audio issues, aka being stressed by both the [loud, alarming] type sound & the [gross textural misophonia hell] type.....earlier i was like “where is the dish sponge” (still don’t know) & went to get a new, packaged one which had been in a drawer, but that one was gone too, good that there’s no pressing need to wash dishes rn i guess.....still struggling with the “well i guess i’m trying to put myself out there Socially” attempt to find relevant public discords, being generally overwhelmed as actually talking to randos in a group is A Lot & in theory it’s like well you meet someone Specific you’d enjoy talking to & branch off from there but unfortunately you can’t just skip to that step, also i do not genuinely Expect to get to that step either way, also i am not easily finding servers in the 1st place b/c it’s like, well i talk about Interests but what am i interested in? who knows. don’t do art “seriously” enough to rly wanna discuss it much, thought abt Language Learning but one i found wants you to have a verified account lmao like, no thanks. in theory i enjoy Socializing some but in practice it is sure a trial & i have not said anything to anyone anywhere yet, just a “well, not sure what else i could do here situation,” in theory take up an In Person hobby / group to make it all easier but that’s not happening. which, i was also Frustrated remembering oh right i spent a year as measured by my personal age in 1 location, both Pandemic & other [society] problems, & speaking of Interests & Hobbies not having them, i was also >:| over something having kicked in my Math Sensibilities (aka that i like math) & wondering like, would i have enjoyed getting more into math / some particular application, who knows, same but also even more so re: other things i get the sense i’m quite Into, like learning languages & ~performing arts~, which, i at least took math / math related classes into college level courses, which is not true for those other things (took a Language Class: never, took a theatre / drama class: for 1/4 of the schoolyear in 7th grade, & prior to that, just did a scene or two of a play in english class 4th grade, & the approx decade extracurricular of ballet, which is related but of course a different thing. anyhow, annoyed that i Simply Do Not Know & hardly see opportunities to find out on the horizon, although who knows.....which is related to being frustrated about [Society] some more like, thinking about “boy how different would it be if people were guaranteed the right to Essentials For Life like housing, food, medical care, both electricity & the internet Now A Days...” like, agonizing What If there, it is all so unnecessary that It Is Like This......just now someone made an unnecessary Post lmfao thank you xkit.......oh right, i was Frustrated, with an emphasis In Aro / Ace, about Media & Life, what else is new & then, you know, musings on The Theoretical Future & One’s Personal Past that would become even more of a like, audioscape: therapy session topic, these are frustrating things. and all of this answer has been stuff i remember getting Frustrated about in the past 24 hours. Also!!! that last night i was like, i want to play scrabble, so i looked up an online game but the Computer settings are a nightmare like, as far as i could tell the Difficulty settings were mostly attuned to Average Word Length but it was like, yeah you’re playing against this opponent given this effective total familiarity with the most obscure / archaic shit in the scrabble dictionary, not even simply the like, q words / two letter words ppl might happen to know specifically for the purposes of scrabble. there was also no “new game” button?? just had to refresh the page? smh. oh lmfao! also! you Know i was frustrated thinking about Billions, the series / interest that antagonizes you, jokes on you when you hone in on the Quant where it’s like, is he just meant to be the guy who sucks, plus he’s got depression....suppose they do at least handle him w/some sympathy / nonzero Care for this Char acter, but smh at sighing about [bracing yourself for anything promising (cough riawin) to spiral into disaster one way or another, whether it turns into a joke or plot device or just something introduced / built up / demolished for ambient drama/conflict].....what else is new. the periodic cycles of Billions Thoughts lol. was just frustrated at a video’s Editing Cadence basically lmfao. i also find it grating when the word “the jab” is used in tweets re: vaccination, which i just saw, presumably in the same sort of way where i automatically dislike the phrase To Be Fair or referring to food/eating with “fill / filling” or any variants lmfao, or earnest use of the description “hearty”......some words i hate the sound of no matter what, some i hate to hear used in a particular phrase / context......need to simply stop doing things in the middle of answering this b/c it will inevitably involve Frustrations lmfaooo. oh also i was annoyed to wake up to a clear sky. where’s that overcast atmosphere

Moon- Are you currently reading any books? If so, what book(s)?

i am not, but i’ve been considering it! just inconvenient b/c a) i gotta like, choose what book/s to read, & b) i have to read via laptop, which is kind of a pain, & c) like with everything, i always tend to basically read stuff all at once, but i’m also a slow reader lmao, so it’s like, okay, i’m probably basically devoting days on end to Reading Through whatever.....

Pluto- If you could meet anyone, alive or dead, who would you meet?

another classic Fascinating Answer of “i dunno” lol, i’ve never really had a go to answer for this or anything that’s particularly leapt out.....plus re: how i tend to feel nervous with on the spot socializing, the concept of like “if you could have dinner with someone” is too much lmfao like, a waste of time, i’d simply Be Nervous my way completely through it. the only way i could think of things is like, here i go giving someone an interview, i guess, and whomst tf would i feel Prepared to talk to lmfao. relevant to interests it’s like well of course you could ask w. roland things the in depth secret jared questions, or Any questions about quant n billions, but then it’s also like, well, there’s the questions I already have an answer for lol & either you have the same answer or i have a mini monologue, not like i don’t speak in mini monologues all the time if i have something to say at all, and my Questions go like that too lmfao, a disaster already trying to ask people about pertinent Information......never able to think of things re: people who have died, i suppose there’s fun answers re: like, getting lost / unknown Historical Info......when it comes to meeting people i don’t really consider it much in advance b/c i am nervous about everything & aware that any interacting is a Challenge lmfao. whenever these things actually happen, it’s hardly always a disaster, but i’m just improvising in the end. also, i could meet people i actually know but have never met, i.e. you, who i talk to but we are Virtual & Pandemic’d & etc & so on. but i suppose that’s kind of a given lol

Aquila- Do you prefer to read books or watch movies?

i think movies are less Involved for me, like, even if it takes me 3x their runtime (or longer) to watch any videos thanks to getting distracted & stuff, still quicker than i read a book, & unless i’m watching something for the first time and/or really wanting to properly pay attention, i can do other things while putting a movie on, whereas if i’m reading that’s the One Thing i can be doing. but overall i’m like “media, what media” whichever format lol like. haven’t consumed things, don’t often think of specific works i want/plan to consume, don’t often get around to it, etc. classique.....

Protostar- Give a random fact about yourself.

speaking of classic, me struggling to recall 101 info about myself or answer not that out there Questions, but when it’s like “alright hater what are you disgruntled about now” it’s like, Deep Inhale lmfao, but [are you okay? Is Anyone].jpeg on that one as well, we are out here......uh i’m sure i’ve said it before but i’m around 5′11″? maybe 6 ft tall but that might be overdoing it. sort of Average Tall but i am always literally looking down on people lmao.....and bumping my head into a low hanging light fixture around here.....

#nothingunrealistic1 #you know that's my On Brand query lol.....the three dozen ways of annoyed i probably am / have been on any given day

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