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secretgiftsforshaman · 4 years

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Real Healing Shit Part 2

After our play last night, I felt unsettled and upset and it took me a while to identify why. Much of it was an emotional release that came up to be processed, but some of it was unmet needs in the moment, because I did not understand them enough to ask for them to be met. I must emphatically insist that you did not do anything to hurt or neglect me. What we have done together has not, as far as I can tell, created any new injuries (at least for me), it has only uncovered old pain and trauma which already existed in my body so that it could be released. What follows is what I have processed and come to understand on this front so far:

I’ve written before about how stiffly I’ve always held my hips and pelvis because of the stuck, stagnant energy therein, and how I carry a lot of weight on my abdomen, and how much of it is a physical manifestation of the energetic armor and unprocessed emotions that I’ve accumulated over the years. I refuse to accept the bullshit (super unscientific, harmful, and dangerous) idea that thin = healthy and fat = unhealthy, because I, as a person who is studying and familiarizing herself with the true best practices regarding our relationships with food and with our bodies, know that everyone’s body is capable of knowing what it wants and needs, and that happy, exercised, well-nourished, and healthy bodies can be (and are) all kinds of different shapes and sizes. And I also intuitively know that my particular body will be happier when I can let go of much of the weight that is extra for me - because it is a simultaneously literal and metaphorical weight. The energetic/psychological/historical patterns that I have stored in my chakras/energy body *are* the same thing as this extra flesh. In order for me to do much of the Divine Feminine healing work we both serve - that which comes from my own life, and that which I have inherited - I need to engage with and dislodge these stuck emotions and traumas, and then feel them until I can release and resolve them. (I seem to have inherited a LOT of energetic trauma from my family and ancestors - all kinds of crappy behavioral/relationship/thought software, especially through my maternal line. My work is cut out for me!)

It feels like there is a deep, deep well of this stuff that is stuck deep in my lower belly, and that it can be accessed through ecstatic movement, energy work, sex, and pleasure (and naturally, the overlap of these) - through the physical and energetic movement of and within my pelvic bowl and female reproductive organs. The first time I remember masturbating was sometime in later elementary school when I discovered that pressing deeply into my lower abdomen brought me a particular pain-pleasure, never satisfying, but strongly desired all the same. Even after I learned how to stroke my clit to orgasm in college, I have continued to find myself wanting to press deep into this tight, needy, aching place (often when I’m full of sexual energy after a clitoral orgasm) which I think is somewhere near or just beyond my cervix, and I believe to be the inner nexus of my second chakra.

I think that a lot of the types of sexual desire that I’ve been feeling - wanting to be fucked hard and rough and deep, wanting my ass spanked and played with and fucked, wanting to be split open and have everything I’ve been carrying around in this place pulled out and held and tended to, wanting to be emptied of all the old, stagnant, painful detritus so that I have space to move kundalini up into and through my second chakra in a way that will allow me to truly surrender and receive pleasure and create and connect socially and sexually in healthy and whole ways: all of this lust is my bodymindheartsoul asking for the type of sexual energy work that it needs to heal itself. This is, I think, a big part of why we are called to each other: you are a safe, trustworthy, masculine source of the destructive sexual energy I need to destroy and heal the feminine wounds that Gaia has bestowed on me to carry and seek healing for. You are an acolyte of the Goddess who knows how to hold the Sacred Space I need to do this work, and I am a healer in her training/self-healing/transformation journey preparing to serve the Divine Feminine in my future clients (both formal/mass-consciousness clients and the erstwhile “clients” that have always been drawn to me for counsel and nurturing). This is why we are drawn together. This is our sacred contract.

For the longest time I’ve wanted to be filled and stretched open in a way that my own fingers could never achieve. During sex with Sweetie, I could never relax enough to accept more than two of his fingers at the absolute maximum - most of the time one was as much as I could take, but I often wanted more then, and I DEFINITELY do now. I don’t think we really spent enough time with foreplay, with few exceptions, and that this is part of why I found it so difficult to accept penetration: I rarely felt safe/unguilty enough to take as much of his time and effort as I needed to become fully aroused and/or have a truly satisfying climax. I also think that my bodymindheartsoul knew that I was not yet mature enough, or safe and held enough, to begin processing the stored shadow ‘stuff’ that would be woken up once I allowed anyone (wether someone else or even myself) deep enough into my body to touch it and awaken it.

A little over a week ago, I (finally, at the ripe old age of 29!!) got myself a dildo. This long held and growing desire to be stretched open the way I have never truly been ready for before - almost like lancing an abscess - has made penetration sound so fucking good that I gave in and sought out something to fill that need (pun so intended). The first time I tried the new toy, again about a week ago, it was very difficult for me to enjoy. I brought myself to climax once before I even began inserting it, because I hoped it would help prepare me. It didn’t help much, and eventually I had to stop because try as I might (again - I made the mistake of trying to force my pleasure, and I think I tried too soon after my bleed ended as well) it became more and more painful and I slid further and further away from pleasure, let alone orgasm. As I was trying to force myself back towards pleasure and climax, I became angry and frustrated with myself, but eventually I became numb and almost detached. I think that some lines blurred between the stored pain that I was tapping and releasing, and the pain that I was causing myself.

In the time since, I have experimented more with my new toy (but also while trying to practice self-compassion and surrender and self-trust) and I have achieved two of the BIGGEST, most long-lasting orgasms OF MY LIFE, and I loved the boneless, deep, pleasurable aaaaaache afterward :) Last night I wanted to experience another amazing climax like that, and to share it with you. I also felt that longing to be stretched open, to be fucked hard and rough and ragged, and it wasn’t until after the fact that I realized it was at least partially because a deeper part of me wanted more of that stubborn baggage exorcised out of me - it wanted the violent sex that could break open my injured parts so I could do more healing. Our dance turned me on enough that it was easy to penetrate myself and accept the toy I wanted to use, and with it I tried to give myself that hard deep fuck, but I really wanted someone else - someone I trust, like you - to give it to me. I kept pushing myself again, and I fucked myself deep and hard, and I became frustrated, and at once point - almost like a fever breaking - my emotions shifted and a vulnerable, sad place opened up within me, and a deep muscle trembling began. If you’ve read anything about psoas muscle/deep pelvic muscle trauma release, you’ll know what I’m talking about. This happened shortly before we both agreed to let go of orgasm and call it a night.

After we slowed down and stopped, I continued to feel a deep, occasionally sharp physical pain, with it’s correlated emotional ache and sadness, and wanted to debrief and receive aftercare and comfort to process it with. I think my assessment of feeling ‘restored’ was a little premature - it was less a restored energy, and more that I was feeling the healing process begin. Because we didn’t continue this work together, I turned to familiar sources of comfort to self-soothe and regulate my nervous system: hearty food, an audiobook, my bed, and a mindless phone game (mahjong, sudoku, and nonograms, if you’re wondering). These are all useful tools which, sometimes I use intentionally, and sometimes I misuse to numb myself out with. Last night, I chose to mindfully use them to help me settle and cope with the pain and sadness that our play had woken up in me, but these are only coping mechanisms: they are not the held sacred space and emotional connection that I needed to support me while I did the healing work with the released trauma. I wanted to ask you for more attention, but I chose not to both because I wanted you to have enough rest after giving so much of yourself, and because I needed to step back and try to understand what I was feeling and needing before I could explain it to you and ask you to help meet it.

I want you to know - with absolute certainty - that you cannot accept *any* responsibility for this experience I had. Yes, I felt my needs and I were neglected and untended, but because I did not communicate that to you (largely because I didn’t yet understand what those needs were), you are 100% blameless in this. Furthermore, it is only because of this unpleasant experience that I do now know what I want and need, and what to ask for in the future.

Because of my raw, mid-transformation state, and the way that sexual play has such power to prompt emotional release in me, even casual, fun sexual play has potentially intense emotional consequences for me. If we are going to continue to play, I would ask that we only allow ourselves to get into it when we both have the time and energy for aftercare and processing. For my part, I promise to improve my self-monitoring and communication so that I don’t set myself up to be neglected again and we can both have a better idea of when I will need that extra attention, and when I am safe to just have some fun. I ask you to keep in mind that I am dealing with deep and difficult work - deeper than many other Dakini you have danced with, I suspect - and I will need you to make sure that both of us are tended to as we do. Even light, easy play has the tendency to draw serious business out of my metamorphosing energy body. I am still learning how to fill my own cup, and how to ask for help filling myself up when needed. Please encourage me to tend to myself this way, and I encourage you to do the same. Neither of us can serve the Goddess from empty vessels.

I know down in my bones that I need to process this physically stored emotional/mental/spiritual trauma in my second chakra and develop healthier ways of processing trauma and meeting my needs that go beyond mere coping mechanisms and instead allow me, one day, to do this work for myself. I don’t want to rely on you forever. I want to learn how to hold the space I need for myself while I heal - because that is what will make me strong enough of a healer to hold sacred space for others, too - but until I learn how to do so, I need your help to destroy those energetic blocks and I need your support while I reassemble myself afterwards. I need my Shaman to swim alongside me in the shadowy deep. Teach me how to fish in the bottom of my ocean, Weaver. Help me weave a net to catch myself. To fish out the good pieces I can rebuild myself with and leave the dross that only weighs me down.

This isn’t the kind of work we can do every day - my system isn’t yet strong enough to process this deeply more than once, maybe twice a week. I trust us to flow and feel the timing out as we go. I am intimidated and afraid of the vast sea I’m diving into, but I have come too far to give up now. I have done entirely too much giving up, and I’m committing now to saving myself before I drown, and training until I am a strong enough swimmer to accompany others in their own oceans.

Time to jump in the deep end, Lover. Are you coming with me?

All my love,

Your Lionfish

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the-cryptographer · 6 years

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wrapped up playing final fantasy ix

yeah, idk, at some point it became clear to me that the game wasn’t really heading in the directions i wanted it to. that was... a while ago, lol. but i’m usually committed to finishing these things once i start them, even if they’re less than what i’d hoped.

on the game side of things... it’s a final fantasy game. it’s got all the regular final fantasy stuff going on. for this one in particular, i guess i like this type of ability system. otherwise it’s your standard, mostly-mindless turned based combat. summons take way to long to play. as usual i tend to favour physical combat interspersed with a healer that can cast holy. but i ended up relying a lot on Frog Drop and Dragon Crest, heh. my favourite team is something like Eiko and pick 2 {Quina, Freya, Amarant}.

Also this final fantasy gets credit for finally getting me to like moogles. they are... so cute in this. Stiltzkin is pretty great, as was Mogmi and Moguta being silly in love, but my absolute favourite was Moorock, who gets so gd excited about writing a letter and loudly exclaims ‘I love Mognet!’ even though he’s never heard of it before. why are he and Mozme not on disk four tho?! tell me they made it out okay D’x Although, hmm, I’m not sure why we trusted Artemicion with more superslick at the end there. Since he apparently he got high snorting the last bottle. god, don’t trust the addict with more of his substance.

idk, I guess I’ll go through the story characters. and just... kind of hope I cover everything that way.

Quina

I... love them. And I tend to like gag characters but... I love them. Such ambition... to eat everything. So cute. So silly. So relatable. I also really like the nightgown/smock kind of thing going on. Need more characters dressed like granny that are trying to eat us out of house and home.

Amarant

Um... there seemed to be a lot going on in this sector of the story that kind of... needed more time. Or otherwise needed cutting out, probably. I find it conceptually interesting, at least: loners being confronted with the boundaries of their... determination to be alone. So I like him in spite of myself. But Zidane’s played a pretty shitty trick on him, once upon a time, and it’s a little hard to justify the kind of devotion Amarant has in lieu of that. Because... yes... it is devotion... somehow. And it’s a little hard to buy the way he becomes so easily enamored with how Zidane’s mind works with so little development.

Eiko

Mmm, again, there was some interesting stuff here about her growing up alone, and the way she immediately clung to Zidane as a way to escape that loneliness. But her crush on him is taken a bit too seriously by the narrative, like she’s really in love with him, and that gets a bit creepy, imo. The stuff with Mog is interesting, but kind of too much trying to tug on the heartstrings when the heartstrings haven’t been wound and tuned, if you know what I mean. I suppose, at the end of the day, I didn’t end up liking her all that much. But feel like I could have and should have if they had written her even a little better.

Freya

I love this aesthetic... so much. Kind of a mix of red mage and dragoon, both of which I love individually, plus rat person. She is one of my faves on this basis alone. In terms of her actual personality... it’s so sparse and inconsistent. Ah, there are some landmarks I like - the kind of quiet and sternly professional bits, the loyalty to her homeland, she has some good moments deciding to fight after the destruction of Cleyra, and talking with Amarant too. Just- I’m left feeling like she was never pushed to a workable extreme anywhere in the narrative, and so she doesn’t really have any clear, defining personality characteristic. It’s more like... a lot of shit happens to her, and she’s sad but not too sad, and strong but not too strong. And it’s kind of lacklustre at the end of the day.

Steiner

I don’t really know how to say this except to say it. He’s funny and sweet at times. Overly distracted by rules and decorum, of course. But he also veers hard into being rather annoying to watch at times. He is... not a practical person. Overall, I’m kind of impressed with his bit in the story, though. Even if it fades as the narrative progresses. His relationship with Beatrice was kind of a bright spot in the narrative as a whole for me. I maybe... can’t help but like the fact that this hypercompetent, beautiful lady falls for his bumbling ass. Beatrice in general strikes a neat line between being chilly and needy and, really, way too good for anyone else in the cast.

Vivi

A great character and... ultimately a huge copout. There was a lot of build up to Vivi dying and, ultimately, it felt rather unsatisfying. It felt like they were trying to rob the sadness out of it by limiting what they showed us of him in the epilogue to his breed of offspring. But, even before then, they touched on so many themes about him in a way that really attempted to distance itself from the fear of human mortality. Like, this isn’t something that only happens to weird artificially constructed lifeforms. Human being sometimes find out they only have a couple months or a year left to live, and have to come to terms with that. Hell, all of humanity is on a timer - and not once did anyone really say to Vivi, ‘yeah, it’s true for all of us. We could all die at any moment. We’re only going to last so long, whether it’s a year or ten or a hundred.’ Kuja came kind of close to communicating some of this ‘i’m going to die, just like the Black Mages’. But never in a way that emotionally impacted Vivi, which ws kind of shitty writing, imo.

Dagger/Garnet

I don’t know. She’s rather generic. Which... doesn’t necessarily preclude my attachment in of itself. But, yeah, she’s generic in a way that doesn’t resonate with me, heh. She leans super hard on Zidane the whole narrative, and it’s really not even a little fun. There was some interesting stuff with Ramuh, and with Eiko and her being from the same summoner clan, and her relationship with her mother was great as well. I liked that Dagger got to be sad about Brahne - because let her be sad about losing the people who loved her and who she loved. But... Brahne herself is such a conundrum. I don’t dislike her character and her design as a whole. But I don’t like the game’s ‘fat and ugly are evil’ vibes. And I also don’t like the way she’s immediately forgiven in the public eye, and the eyes of the narrative, once she dies. She... literally destroys cities and kills thousands of people. That’s not really forgivable.

But, regarding Garnet... I started liking her a bit more once she cut her hair and started smiling in her in-game portrait. so, if nothing else, we know I am very shallow.

Zidane

Aaaaand, if I wasn’t already, this is where I start really running into problems. When you don’t really like the main character. When you’re not invested in the main character’s romance that is front and centre of the story and its ending. When you really don’t believe the strength of the emotional connections between the cast that the game is attempting to sell you on... It just makes it really hard to enjoy things. Zidane often seems dismissive, in his own head, and even shallow in the way he attempts to relate to the rest of the cast. It’s everyone else that has to come around to his way of thinking and learn from him, rather than the narrative making much of an effort to teach him about how to actually empathise with others. and it’s kind of grating then that we hear them praise him so casually.

I think, then, combined with the womanising aspect of his character... I don’t know, because I’m certainly not opposed to somebody wanting to sleep with all the ladies. That is an A+ relatable feeling. But, for someone that’s so casual about cozying up to every woman he runs across, I was left feeling like the only woman he had any kind of legitimate connection to was Garnet. (The game tells us he’s good friends with Freya, but does it really show us why? or how?) Which is... I suppose why Garnet, and not Ruby and Freya, was propped up as being Zidane’s major romance. But... idk, it feels a little too much like entitlement. He’s allowed to hit on all the ladies and look good while doing it, while he has a serious relationship developing with Dagger and she’s arguably right there to see him hit on other women, and he also has basically no interest in providing any kind of emotional support or developing any kind of connection with pretty much any woman (except maybe Dagger). Combine this with Cid cheating on Hilda and then she jealously turns him into a beetle - but, wait, this is a happy marriage, the game tells us. and the fact that the game’s major villain is pointedly described as ‘not a skirt chaser like you’... it’s just deifying an entitled straight boy ‘boys will be boys’ kind of attitude when that’s already an accepted social norm. and it’s kind of disgusting. I think there are better ways to talk about infidelity and promiscuity and the desire for the ladies, ones that are still sympathetic to all the parties involved. I think the final fantasy series /has/ talked about it better. With Edgar, who wants to get with all the ladies, but who lets Terra and Celes into his protection and the bounty of Figaro castle without touching either of them, and who is pointedly single even though he’s the sole heir of a kingdom and pushing thirty. And with Tidus, who had a power fantasy dream where Yuna and Rikku are hanging off each of his arms as they roast his father, but that’s before he gets to know each of them better as people. once he does the objectification wanes. I’m not saying that Edgar and Tidus are perfect heroes and wonderfully written, but I think this aspect of them was delivered with more nuance and a more critical eye, and it makes a huge difference.

Also... Are you a team player, Zidane? Or are you just a team player until you’re angry, or decide your pride is on the line? For a kind of ‘friendship is everything’ message, it certainly gets muddled everytime Zidane’s in a snit. Running back into Ispen Castle alone was a weird moment when we’re just getting done telling Amarant not to run around alone. Only okay when I do it(tm) And when he’s being kind of an insufferable bastard at the end of disc 3... just... why are you chasing after him guys? and why, after all that hoopla about accepting his friends’ help, does he deny it when going after Kuja at the end? I'm not saying that there aren’t things one needs to do alone just- why is Zidane always right when he says he needs to do things alone, but everyone else is wrong when they say the same thing? it’s a terrible case of protagonist-centred morality, and it’s really terrible and trite.

idk, I just- I understand why people are sick of the angsty final fantasy heroes after Cloud and Squall (the former I love, the latter I don’t). But I feel Zidane basically fell short in every way that wasn’t being upbeat and energetic, and I’m not sure what everyone sees in him.

Kuja

I can’t help but like this flamboyant bastard. God, he... soooo did not need a tacked on redemption arc. Again, mass genocide isn’t really forgivable. He is a terrible person. full stop. But I’m irrationally pleased he got some sympathy from the narrative anyhow. He’s just... I never liked Sephiroth, but Kuja has convinced me I could have liked Sephiroth if Sephiroth had even a fraction of a personality in ff7.

other than that... the wind/earth/water/fire shrine part of the game was weird. give me real dungeons, devs. also the coffee sidequest is nigh impossible to complete and then the game guilted me, and i hate that.

in the end, i suppose i feel the game was messy. the tone whip-lashed quick between whimsy and pure horror - which should be my jam but, idk, it didn’t work here for me. and a lot of the major characters and storylines lacked depth, or otherwise lacked nuance, or otherwise lacked payoff. it’s kind of hard to watch so much effort and so many good ideas flop so hard, but it flopped hard for me. i don’t get the hype about this game.

#meta lite #ff9

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nostalgic-blood · 7 years

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THAT MOVIE THO.

spoilers under the cut of course

Yeah yeah yeah pacing issues, too much cool stuff crammed into a movie with too little time to spare for many characters including AJ and Flutts who unfortunately made no friends and thus, had they not been in the movie nothing would really have affected the plot. They were there for MORAL support okay. Also my favourite gag wouldn’t have worked without Fluttershy. I wish I could watch it again to refresh my memory, but basically they were stowaways on an airship full of pirates, and the pirates find them and threaten them, like eating them or scarring them or SCARRING THEM EMOTIONALLY, and each threat is tailored to a specific pony, and the emotional one focused on Fluttershy. That was great. I loved that gag.

Also the plot was like, simple. EXTREMELY SIMPLE. bad guys show up. Run away from bad guys. search for macguffin that can defeat the bad guys. Bad guys capture good guys anyway. FRIENDSHIP IS POWER THAT CAN DEFEAT--well no, not in the giant rainbow beam smashes into bad guy kind of defeat. The bad guy actually died, and there was a lot of fighting in the climax. Huh.

Well anyway the world building was very good which I normally would never even comment on because when it comes to MLP I usually don’t give two shits about the lore. For instance in season seven they’re introducing a whole bunch of mythical legends that while might be interesting on their own, are presented in a such a way that the episode tends to be a complete bore. What do I learn about Rarity or AJ in an episode where all they do is tell campfire stories? There is no focus on a conflict or any moral lesson (except the small ones in the stories themselves) and little interaction between the main characters. I was so bored by that episode. The Daring Do episode fared even worse and somehow they shoehorned it as Pinkie’s legend (??!!?) despite Pinkie having not read any Daring Do books and having little reason to be on this adventure. (This doesn’t even begin to describe how much Daring Do being real is one of the weakest aspects of the show itself, but I digress)

The only episode that was an interesting way to depict a legend was the Fluttershy episode because figuring out who this historical healer was, was important to curing and preventing the spread of a horrible deadly illness, so that one had great and suspenseful setup with a lot of development for Fluttershy. And frankly I think in terms of legends themselves Fluttershy’s was the least interesting, but because it was framed by a really good episode about Flutters it was the best one.

Oh right I was supposed to talk about the movie.

But yeah, one thing I REALLY like and thought was a possibility in the MLP universe were sky pirates or at least sky sailors or whatever, and HERE THEY ARE, EXISTING! And BEING PIRATES! AIRSHIPS ARE A THING! They even had one in the newest MLP episode. I knew they existed for a long while (one appeared in a small moment during Rarity’s song in Sweet and Elite back in season two) but they were never really utilized until this movie. I don’t know how i feel about tons of all anthro-looking creatures though. I always assumed the world of MLP was all these quadrupedal creatures and if they did stand on two legs it was because they were hybrids with human-like pieces such as minotaurs. Or dragons, but let’s not talk about them.

But here it’s this anthro-cat, and some anthro-fishmen, and then anthro birds, and the big bad is okay because he looks like a primate of some sort, so it makes sense, but the rest of em... ehhhh. I guess since they went OUTSIDE Equestria it makes sense there are a much larger variety of creatures/races, and maybe Equestria is the just the one with the most four-legged equines, but...

Also I think we almost had enough screentime with these new characters to like them. Almost. I was starting to like them, but it wasn’t to the point that if these characters suddenly decided to help the mane six that it’d be 100% believable. Since there wasn’t much time devoted to each of them, the fact that catman decided to side with them just because Rarity in those few precious seconds fixed the hem of his shirt was a little less realistic or believable as it could have been. I get what they were trying to do, but if more time was devoted to it, it would have had much more impact. The pirates especially I thought maybe they would blame the Mane Six for leading to the destruction of their ship, but they were actually really reasonable for pirates that when we first saw them were about to eat them. They realized straight away that the real reason their ship exploded was because their boss sucked.

I could totally believe the Princess Seapony!Hippogriff thing siding with them though. She was just lonely and wanted friends. There were no ethical issues to get in the way at all like murderous pirates or conmen. The fact that the queen did not join them made sense though, since Twilight royally fucked up.

Speaking of Twilight I see a lot of people complaining she was not very Twilight in this movie, doing things that opposed the message of friendship. It made sense to me that she fell back to her more logical, rational way of life though. As they were journeying to find the Queen of the Hippogriffs, normal singing happy friendship methods to solve problems wasn’t really working. They befriended this cat man but he actually just wanted to sell them and was using them. Then they changed the ways of the pirates, but in doing so led the enemy straight towards them. I can see how Twilight thought this wasn’t like Equestria, the land of the colourful happy pastel ponies and their usual modus operandi wasn’t gonna work here. She was desperate! But due to the amount of time they had they could not spend a lot of time emphasizing this, so it may have come off to some people that Twilight was acting a lot more malicious than she is.

Another thing is this movie is clearly not for some random person to walk into a theatre, sit down, and just start watching like they’d understand the movie if it were just a standalone thing. There isn’t much time used up at all to introduce our characters and to make a blind audience care about them. It only really works if you’re already attached to the characters and know who they are, so it really wasn’t a good movie to attract casual moviegoers or anything like that.

I think another comment complaint is how helpless the ponies are especially when they are outside Equestria. This I thought was odd because we have Twilight who still had her magic which could basically solve anything and do anything if the plot demands in the show. Or Rainbow Dash who is supposedly faster than mach 3 or whatever, but neither of these two used their overpowered abilities effectively throughout the movie, almost like the movie forgot that Twilight could teleport or Rainbow Dash could escape.

But anyway all of that is moot. Why is all the above moot? Because we had a movie with a clear beginning, middle, and end. There were decent songs and a pretty good score. It’d otherwise just be a normal run of the mill 6-7/10.

BUT THAT IS MOOT BECAUSE PINKIE PIE WAS AMAZING IN THIS MOVIE. AND I WATCH MLP FOR PINKIE PIE. SHE IS THE NUMBER ONE REASON I AM INVESTED IN THIS FANDOM AT ALL. AND SHE HAD THE MOST FOCUS OF THE MANE SIX AFTER TWILIGHT.

The biggest issue I always had with adventure episodes which were usually the season premieres and finales of the show was that it was always heavily Twilight focused with the other five on the wayside. I did not want to watch a movie where Twilight solves the problem herself and her friends are hostages, or out of commission, nor not themselves, or otherwise not doing anything that affected the plot. They were just along for the ride. Yes unfortunately this ended up being the case for two of the Mane Six, but that’s just another side-effect of them not making this movie longer or utilizing what time they had effectively. (We could have had less new supporting characters or something, idk)

But luckily for my biased-self it was Pinkie they chose to focus on. When they don’t focus on Pinkie and she isn’t important she’s usually just the mindless comedic relief, which was always a depiction I hated of Pinkie. Equestria Girls Pinkie is exactly this, and that’s why she’s my least favourite in the EG Universe. This is fine if Pinkie’s comedy was actually good, but usually they aim for lolrandom humour when that happens. Pinkie’s comedic moments in the movie were much more often hit than miss. I didn’t really dislike any scene with Pinkie at all! At no point did she seem overly obnoxious. Maybe the time when she was trying to play I Spy, but the rest of the Mane Six were audibly exasperated with her so they were self-aware how obnoxious she can be at times, lol.

Also yes, she did ruin some moments too like a few others. And by ruin I mean, the Mane Six are trying to do something and have a perfectly good plan to do so, but one of the characters do the thing they’d always do and it’d ruin the plan. For Pinkie that was just yelling out loud in the marketplace trying to find help, this led them to being conned by the cat man and almost being captured. Then Rainbow ruined everything when she went overboard trying to turn the pirates by showing off her Sonic Rainboom, which is a very loud and flashy technique catching the bad guys’ attention and ruining their plans. Finally Twilight ruined everything when she straight up tried to steal the pearl. So at least it wasn’t ONLY Pinkie... and all of them to me seemed perfectly in-character or made sense for that specific context anyway.

A good example of an adventure episode where Pinkie isn’t very important but has great comedic moments is the season five premiere. She’s the first to notice the odd smiles and has great expressions and reaction faces to the weird town they’re in, and when the Mane Six are being brainwashed she has some great dry humour as well. Still funny when not even trying to be funny! A good example of an episode where Pinkie is not effective whatsoever at being comedic relief is the season three premiere. Pinkie’s just being really loud and screechy. Even if I did like the flugelhorn bit where she yells “FLUGELHORN” into a flugelhorn while trying to play the flugelhorn.

I think the reason why this movie gave such focus to Pinkie over the other five instead of someone else is that Pinkie is the most popular character among the target audience. All the little girls adore her. She’s definitely not the most popular among the brony community, but I’m glad the little girls have great taste! Also Twilight messes up and SHE gets captured, not all her friends at once! It is her friends who she alienated and ostracized that came to the rescue instead. I like this because even though Twilight is the Princess of Friendship now, it doesn’t mean she’s some flawless individual who is the end-all and be-all to friendship. She is the princess because she has many great friends, and they all complete her. It doesn’t make sense for a princess of friendship to not be doing things with her friends. That’s like Luna with no moon, or Cadance without a husband.

Also while Tempest whatever has a much better backstory than Starlight, I still find it a little annoying that MLP has a habit of infodumping a villain’s (that is meant to be redeemed) backstory blatantly in our face, and now we have to feel sorry for them and completely understand their motivations. I thought her villain song started out strong but fell apart when it just jumped into her backstory like that. Again, if the movie had more runtime we could have explored her backstory and motivations in either much more subtle ways, or with more depth, or not all at once. Still despite her edginess she was one of the more fleshed out new characters, so I’ll give her that.

The movie actually reminds of two fanfics I’ve read that have sky pirates and a world outside Equestria. In one, the villain is trying to find and kidnap the protagonist for their dastardly deeds, just like in the movie trying to kidnap Twilight for power, and the cast runs across faraway lands to escape. The other just has a bunch of sky pirates. I love those sky pirates. I made a sky pirate AU for ponies once that if I weren’t so invested in my RWBY AU powered by 1000% salt I might actually attempt to write. SKY PIRATES!!1!11!!!

It’s like the movie was pandered directly to me. Good Pinkie content and sky pirates. Yay! So, with all that bias included I’d give the movie a solid 8.5/10. But that’s just me personally. If Pinkie ISN’T your favourite character or you enjoy more complicated plots with more unpredictability you might rate it a more objective 6 or 7 out of 10.

8.5 tho. Just for Pinkie. PINKIEEEEE!!

#here i am ranting again ~#i thoroughly enjoyed the movie tho #gr8 movie would r8 again #text!post #rant!post #mlp!shit #spoilers

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